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《南方公园》第16季 第01集 South Park Season 16 Episode 01 "马桶位" "Reverse Cowgirl"
I'm going down to south park gonna have myself a time
Friendly faces everywhere humble folks without temptation
Going down to south park gonna leave my woes behind
Ample parking day or night people shouting howdy neighbor
Heading on out to south park gonna see if I can't unwind
I like girls with big vaginas I like girls with big fat titties
Come on down to south park and meet some friends of mine.
传给我 传给我 Throw it here. Throw it here.
干得好 克莱德 Ya, nice one Clyde.
克莱德 Clyde!
克莱德 上来 快 Clyde, get up here, hurry.
那是什么 What is that?
马桶 A toilet.
没错 That's right.
这是个马桶 克莱德 It's a toilet, Clyde.
那马桶座圈在哪呢 And where is the toilet seat?
在上面 It's up!
因为你又没把它放下来 Because you left it up, again!
无数次了 克莱德 We have been through this countless times, Clyde.
行了老妈 别当着我朋友的面说 好吗 Okay, mom. Just not in front of my friends. Okay?
不好 No, not okay.
因为你压根没听进去 Because you're not getting the message.
万一我掉进去了呢 What if I fell in.
别光站着 Stop listening to me!
把它放下来 Put it down!
谢谢 Thank you.
太悲催了 克莱德 Dude, that sucks, Clyde.
当妈的不该这样连上厕所都要管 A mom shouldn't be able to put rules on toilet time like that.
上厕所可是美国人最后的自由了 Toilet time is the last part of American freedom.
你妈一直都这样吗 兄弟 Is your mom always like that, dude?
这事你们能别在学校张扬吗 Look, could you guys not say anything about this at school please?
当然 哥们 放心吧 Of course, man. It's cool.
克莱德 克莱德 Clyde! Clyde!
我不是说了尿尿要坐着吗 What I have told you about pissing on the seat.
克莱德说 Clyde is like,
"行了老妈 操 别当我朋友的面说" "oh, okay mom, fuck, not in front of my friends."
卡特曼 完全没笑点 Cartman, it was actually really lame.
我知道 I know right.
女人都羡慕嫉妒恨嘛 Women are jealous they have to
因为女人撒尿拉屎都只能把脸对着外面嘛 face outward to pee and crap.
等下 你们都是脸对着外面拉屎吗 Wait a minute. You're supposed to poop in a toilet facing out?
我以为应该这样坐在马桶上的 But I thought you sit on the toilet this way
这样就能在架子上看漫画呀 so you have the nice little shelf for your comic book
喝巧克力奶呀 and chocolate milk.
当然 还可以直接按冲水按钮 Of course. You have the flusher here.
不是吗 No?
天啊 太尴尬了 Oh, geez, that's embarrassing.
克莱德 克莱德 Clyde, Clyde!
找到你了 There you are.
妈妈 Mom?
克莱德·多诺万 你给我马上回家 Clyde Donovan you come home this instant.
为什么 Why?
我是怎么跟你说的 What have I told you about
上完厕所要把座圈放下去 putting the toilet seat down after you go to the bathroom?
老妈 我在上课呢 Mom, I'm in class.
我还要跟你讲多少次 克莱德 How many time do I have to tell you, Clyde?
我正准备去上班 I was trying to get ready for work,
就看见座圈又立起来了 and the toilet seat was up again.
贝特西 回家吧 没那么严重 Betsy, come back home. It's just not that big a deal.
不 罗杰 这是个恶习 No, Roger it's a disgusting habit.
我彻底受够了 And I'm sick and tired of it.
如果我坐下了 If I had sat down,
就会沾到一阴道的马桶水 I would've gotten toilet water all over my vagina.
我奶奶就是弗吉尼亚来的 My grandmother is from Virginia.
"弗吉尼亚"与"阴道"发音相近
马上给我回家 克莱德 You're coming home right now, Clyde.
给我把座圈放到正确的位置上 And you're putting the toilet seat down where it belongs.
我们走 Let's go!
哥们 跟你说件笑死人的事 Dude, I'm telling you it was freaking hysterical.
克莱德课上一半就走了 Clyde had to get up in the middle of class
跟着他妈妈回家 把马桶座圈放下来 and follow his mom home to put the toilet seat down.
真是丢脸丢到家了 我估计他都想死了 He was so embarrassed dude, I thought he was gonna die.
我知道 肥猪 我在场 I know, fat ass, I was there.
他妈妈...他妈妈说 His mom...his mom goes,
"克莱德你这个混蛋... Clyde you're an asshole and
害得我一妹妹的马桶水" now I got toilet water in my vajayjay.
她不是这么说的 你又在添油加醋 That's not what she said. You're putting extras on it again.
一点都不好笑 It's not that funny.
我知道厕所现在是美国人最后的自由之地了 I know that bathroom is the last part of American freedom.
你难道一点也不同情克莱德吗 Don't you feel just a little bad for Clyde?
你应该同情他 Well, you should.
那个可怜的娃 不该为这些丁点儿小事 The poor guy shouldn't be screamed at for something
而被人大叫大骂 just isn't that big of a deal at all.
出什么事了 What's going on?
他们在救克莱德的妈妈 They're trying to save Clyde's mom.
她怎么了 From what?
据说克莱德又没放下马桶座圈 They're saying Clyde left the toilet seat up again.
坚持住 你会没事的 Hang in there, you're going to be fine. Okay?
保持清醒 Stay with me now.
抱歉 我们也无能为力了 I'm sorry. There is nothing we can do.
-什么 -她掉进去的同时 - What? - When she fell into the toilet,
按了冲水键 she also made it flush.
形成了一股吸力 把她吸了进去 It created a suction that is literally pulling out her in sides.
我们不能拆分厕所和管道吗 Can't we disconnect the toilet from the plumbing?
能 且只能这么做 Yes, we have to.
但如果真这么做 But when we do that
所产生的压力变化会吸出她的器官 the change in pressure will rip out her organs.
但她不会死的 对吧 But she's not going to die, is she?
你为什么不放下座圈 孩子 Why did you leave the toilet seat up, son?
克莱德 克莱德 Clyde, Clyde.
克莱德 你要知道我并不怪你 Clyde, I want you to know I don't blame you for this.
以前你没放下座圈的时候 We should have been harder on you all those times
我们对你再严厉一点就好了 you left the toilet seat up.
妈妈 对不起 Mom, I'm sorry.
我没多少时间了 克莱德 I don't have a lot of time, Clyde.
为了你姐姐 从今往后 Just please put the seat down from now on
记得要放下座圈 for your sister's sake.
拜托了 天哪 Please, oh God.
让我解脱吧 Please, let me go.
让我解脱吧 Let me go.
动手吧 动手 Do it, do it, do it!
翻译：胡好时 小黑 百万总舵主
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校对：原子蛋 时间轴：珍珍 今
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后期：鱼骨头 总监：原子蛋
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妈妈 Mom.
我记忆最深的是贝特西·多诺万的仁慈和善 I'll remember Betsy Donovan's kind nature more than anything.
她总是尊重敬待他人 She always treated people with dignity and respect.
她的离去是我们莫大的伤悲 What a tragedy she had to leave us so soon.
但我相信贝特西希望 But I'm sure Betsy is hoping
她的离去可以帮助所有的女性 her death will help women everywhere,
提醒她们在上厕所之前 just take that extra second to look
多检查几秒钟 before they sit on a toilet.
我想要代表亡者说 I'd like to say on behalf of the departed that
不是女人有义务去检查座圈是否放下来了 it isn't a woman's responsibility to see the seat is down.
而是男人有义务放下它 It's a man's responsibility to put it down.
这并非难事 It's not that hard.
-说的好 -没错 - Yes, that's right. - Ya.
放下座圈并非难事 Putting the toilet seat down isn't that hard.
所以 当然是 女人 So, is it too much to ask, women,
在盲目地冲掉大便之前 to just look and put it down
检查检查 放下座圈 before they go plopping their butts blindly on the toilet bowl.
上帝啊 各位 这是场葬礼 My God, people, this is a funeral.
请放尊重点 Please have some respect!
这儿有个小男孩刚刚失去了他的母亲 There is a little boy here who has lost his mother.
他再也见不到她了 He'll never see her again,
只因为他小便后 because he couldn't take the six tenths of a second
不肯花那半秒钟 去放下座圈 to put the toilet seat down when he was done peeing.
现在小克莱德的妈妈去世了 Now little Clyde's mother is dead
而他的小鸡鸡就是罪魁祸首 and the blood is on his penis.
老妈 快去开门 Mom, get the door!
您好 女士 Hello, ma'am.
我们是马桶安全管理局的 We're the Toilet Safety Administration.
什么局 The what?
最近那起悲剧之后 After the recent tragedy,
新的安全法案要求我们 new Safety regulations require us
检查所有马桶的安全 to check every toilet for security.
我们能进来吗 Can we come in?
当然 Sure.
这两傻逼是谁 Who are these buttholes?
马桶安全管理局的 宝贝 It's t Toilet Safety Administration hon,
他们是来检查检查马桶的 they're going to do something to the potty.
我的马桶吗 My potty?
他们要对它做什么啊 What are they going to do to it?
喂 那是我的厕所 That's my bathroom.
这个马桶要彻底翻新一下 女士 We're gonna have to completely redo this, mam.
这个柜子至少要往那边移六英尺 You need to have this counter moved at minimum of 6 inches.
我们给你装个安全带 We'll go ahead install the safety belt.
安全带 Safety belt?
联邦法律规定所有马桶都必须装安全带 Federal law requires all Toilets to have a safety harness
这样就没人会掉下去了 so that nobody can fall in.
我才不会绑着安全带上大号 Dude you can't make me wear a seat belt to take a dump.
这是为了你的安全 This is for your safety.
已经有个女人死了 A woman died, you know.
害死她的是克莱德的鸡鸡 又不是我的 The blood is on Clyde's Weiner not mine.
先生 我们很担心我们的朋友克莱德 Sir, we are worried about our friend Clyde.
不管他走到哪 都有人对着他说 Everywhere he goes people are Telling him
他的鸡鸡是罪魁祸首 he has blood on his weiner.
嗯 说 Huh-uh, go on.
我们一直对他说 We keep trying to tell him
也许不全是他的错 maybe this isn't all his fault.
也许造马桶的人 Maybe the people who made the Toilet
应该承担责任 are to blame for what happened.
所以我们一直想着 是不是可以控告某个人 So we were just wondering if we can sue somebody.
想告谁都行 You can always sue somebody.
太好了 Alright.
克莱德你瞧 See, Clyde.
好 我们就告那个发明马桶的人 OK, we want to help him sue who ever invented the toilet.
没问题 You got it.
找到了 马桶发明者 Here we go, Inventer of the Toilet.
英格兰赫尔斯顿的托马斯·哈林顿爵士 Sir Thomas Harington, Helston England.
1692年去世 Died 1692.
他死了啊 Oh, he'd dead.
那就没法告他了咯 So then we can't sue him.
有什么不能的 Why not.
想告谁都行 You can always sue somebody.
只不过要走一些特殊的程序而已 It's just gonna take some special protocol.
我们要举行一个起诉祭 We will have to perform a Suance.
起诉祭 A Suance?
没错 我们事务所 You bet. Here at Hoffman & Turk
专门起诉死人 we specialize in suing the Dead.
只要你们出钱 If you hire us,
我们就为你们 we'll work hard.
卖命 For you.
哇 真的吗 Wow, really?
克莱德你听到没 You hear that, Clyde.
听好了 Now look.
你们必须敞开自己的心扉 I'll be asking all of you to have an open mind
做好接受恐惧的准备 and a willingness to face your fears.
提醒你们 起诉祭可能会非常 I warn you boys. A Suance can be very
贵 Expensive.
有多贵 How expensive?
有多少钱你们 How much do you have?
克莱德有三千块他妈妈的保险理赔呢 Clyde has $3000 from his Mom's life insurance.
哇 起诉祭正好是三千块 Whoa, that's exactly how much a suance costs.
哇 也太巧了吧 Wow, that's weird.
我靠 Damn it.
警官好 Hey, officer.
坐到马桶上 You sitting on the toilet
就必须系好安全带 先生 you Need to be wearing your safety belt, sir.
知道 我本来系着的 Yeah. I had it on
我就解开一下下去拿...拿... I took it off for a second to get to the -- to get to the--
这里的地址是德洛大道260号 Address here is 260 avenue Delos Mexicanos.
拜托 别开罚单啊 Oh, come on. Don't give me a ticket.
安全带要系好 否则可能会掉进去 Gotta wear the safety belt or you could fall in.
我不会掉进去的 I'm not going to fall in.
我又不是娘们 I'm not a chick.
法律面前人人平等啊 Law is the law.
你可以选择缴付罚款 You can pay this by mail
也可以选择超过时限后法庭上见 or appear in court on that date.
祝你一天愉快 先生 Have a nice day, sir.
谢啦 狗屁 Yeah thanks, asshole.
你说什么 You said something?
没 我跟我屁眼说话呢 No I was talking to my asshole.
屁眼 你赶紧拉啊 Come on asshole, let's get back to work.
真是没法相信 This is unbelievable.
傻逼马桶安全管理局 Stupid Toilet Safety Administration.
在IHOP餐厅拉个屎 You can't take a crap at IHOP
还要排40多分钟的队 without a 40 minute line.
鞋子脱掉 皮带解掉 Shoes off, belts off.
锋利物品放到塑料盒里 Sharp objects in the plast tank.
简直没有人道 This is inhuman.
闭嘴 先生 Shut up, sir!
要去拉屎吗 女士 Taking a dump today, ma'am.
没 我小便 No, just need to pee.
好吧 我来检查一下你的屁眼 Alright I just need to check inside your asshole.
我说你们能不能动作快点 Hey how about you people speed it up in here.
我屎都要拉裤子上了 I'm about to crap my pants.
我要求立刻使用马桶 I demand access to the toilet alright now.
介意我摸你蛋蛋吗 先生 Alright, you mind if I touch your balls sir?
当然介意了 Ya I mind.
我摸你蛋蛋你他妈的介意吗 You mind if I touch your fucking balls.
我好了 OK. I'm done.
我来检查一下你的屁眼 I just need to check inse your asshole.
我不用你来给我擦屁股 I don't need you wiping my ass for me.
我是成年人 I'm a grown man.
是啊 你是个大男孩 对吧先生 Yeah, you're a big boy aren't you, sir?
是 我是个大男孩 Yeah, I'm a big boy.
要说"大男孩 长官" That's "Big boy, sir".
我是个大男孩 I'm a big boy.
像大男孩一样拉屎 I took a big boy poop.
孩子们 坐好 什么都别想 Alright. Boys, sit down and clear your minds.
起诉祭马上就开始了 The suance is about tobegin.
门和窗都锁上了 Doors and windows are locked.
500块都准备好了吗 You boys have your $500 in cash ready?
准备好了 Ya.
我这里有一个大碗 是用来装钱的 I have the big bowl set here for the money we're about to make.
我们开始吧 Now, let us start.
我们向死亡之地召唤 We call out to the land of the Dead.
约翰·哈灵顿爵士快快出现 Sir John Harrington, your presence is requested.
约翰·哈灵顿快快出现 Appear to us, John Harrington.
我们有你的传票 We have a subpoena.
天呐 没用啊 Geez,t's not working.
约翰·哈灵顿 John Harrington.
由于你的疏忽 我的客户应该得到补偿 My client is due compensation for negligence.
你的名字叫什么 神灵 What is your name, spirit.
债券 吉米债券 Bonds, Jimmy Bonds.
你觉得我是谁啊 What's it to you?
你们是何许人 Who are you mugs?
古人就是这样说话的 That's how people talked in the past.
我们要告约翰·哈灵顿 你认识他吗神灵 We have a claim against a john harrington, do you know him, Spirit?
也许认识 Well maybe I do.
也许不认识 Maybe I don't.
为了让我好好回忆 你们是不是该意思意思 Might need a little something something to jar my memory.
我们要买通他 往盒子里放一百块 We gotta grease him, put a hundred in the box.
哦对 哈灵顿 我认识他 oh, ya. Harrington, I know him.
总是在琢磨着发明什么东西 Always going around inventing things.
对 就是他 Yes, that's him.
他和你在一起吗 Is his personage amongs you?
也许在 也许不在 Maybe it is, maybe it isn't.
再给他一百块 Give him another hundred.
我见过他 Ya, I've seen him around.
他总是在跟别人炫耀 He was down that way bragging
一个陶瓷的机器什么的 about a porcelain machine and what you have.
不 不 No, no!
借基督之力起诉你 By the power of Christ we sue you.
你们不能起诉我 You can't sue me.
快 Quick.
再扔300块到盒子里 Put another 300 in the box.
这事算进展地相当相当顺利了 This actually went really, really well.
总有些官僚主义分子 Always happens a bureaucrat tries to block
想要阻碍首次起诉祭 the first suance attempt.
但这不错了 明天继续 But this is good, we are going tomorrow.
就这样了 So, that's it?
是的 明天还得再加400块 Yeah, we gonna need $400 more tomorrow.
我知道你为你妈的事而难过 克莱德 I know you're sad about your mom, Clyde.
不过别担心 官司会打赢的 But don't worry, we gonna win this thing.
把你的咖啡放在塑料托盘上 先生 Put your coffee in the plastic tray, sir.
鞋子脱掉 Shoes off.
皮带解掉 Belts off.
行 行 Ya, ya.
口袋里有无金属制品 Got any metal in your pockets?
我得检查你的屁眼 I just need to check your asshole.
真是荒唐 So ridiculous.
屁眼安全 Asshole clear.
多谢 Thanks.
拿走你的咖啡 先生 Pick your coffee up, sir.
总之他说我不能再吃硬冰激凌了... Anyways he says I can't get npne anyway so then he...
我说 那是什么 Hey. What's that thing?
那是摄像头 监控摄像头 That's a camera, security camera.
-你们还监控我 -没事的 先生 - You people have me on camera now? - It's okay, sir.
只有一个人 There is just one person
在一个独立监控室查看监控录像 viewing the monitors in a discrete location.
我们的自由正一个个被剥夺 Exactly how long are we going to sit around
我们还要沉默多久呢 as our freedoms are stripped away one by one?
是时候团结起来 大声宣布 It's time for to us tanned together and say
让政府滚出我们的厕所 we want the government out of our bathroom.
听好 Now, listen.
我们要做的是共同提出倡议 All we have to do is agree as a community
固定马桶座圈 to all bolt our toilet seats down.
要是座圈不能抬起也不能放下 If they can't raise or lower
就不会有人掉进马桶了 there will be zero chance of anyone falling in.
如果没有马桶座圈 If there is no toilet seats
政府就不能制定马桶座圈安全法 the government can't make a Toilet Seat Law.
等一下 如果座圈不能向上翻 Hold on! If the seat can't raise up
男人会尿得到处都是 the men will just pee all over it.
不 我们不会的 No, we won't.
错 你们会的 Ya, you will.
对不起 女士们也许得解决圈圈上面的尿渍 Well, sorry, women might have to deal with a little splash of pee on the rim.
但这可比政府 But it's a far better solution than
在我们厕所里搞的那些好多了 对吧 having the government in our bathrooms. Right?
如果男人同意坐着撒尿 How about we agree to that
我们就同意 if men agree to always sit down to urinate.
不 你不能要求男人坐着撒尿 No, you can't make men sit down to pee.
那我们怎么玩尿沉船的游戏呢 How can we play Sink the Boat?
我和尼尔逊还怎么在狂欢夜尿个大叉叉呢 How will Nelson and I make an X on sleepover nights.
我们这些樵夫又怎么办呢 What about us loggers,
辛勤劳作的我们喜欢大便之后站起来 hard working men who like to stand up
转过身 对着大粪撒一泡尿 after they take a pooh and turn around
造就一条鲜明的大便分水岭 and cut their pooh in half with their urine.
抱歉 若不想被政府当成孩子对待 Well, sorry. But if we don't want our government treat us like children,
我们只能放弃尿出分水岭的权利 we might have to give up being able to pee our feces in half.
我们世代在这里工作 Folks have been logging around this part for generations.
我爸爸教我伐木 他爸爸教他 My papa taught me logging and his papa for him.
我想咱们还是顺着马桶安全管理局吧 I think we have to live with the TSA.
死去的亡灵正环视着传票 The spirits of the Dead are looking over the subpoena.
以原告的名义申请简易裁判 Motion of summary judgement on be half of the plaintiff.
发生了什么 What is happening now?
我们的申请被法官驳回了 Motion has been denied by the judge.
孩子们请集中注意力 Concentrate, boys.
我从来没有遇见过这样的情况 This aspect is like none that I have ever encountered.
他用禁令驳回了我们的诉求 He managed to avert our ability with the injunction to our claim.
这是啥意思 So what is that mean?
明天我们得采取集体诉讼来对付他 We will hit him with a class action lawsuit tomorrow.
把你们的朋友及家人叫来 We need all of your friends and
联名签署请愿书 每人还要交50块 families to sign a petitio and kick in $50 each.
什么 What?
坚持住 克莱德 Hang in there, Clyde.
这都是为了让世界更安全 This is all to make the world a safer place.
安全事故 Security bridge!
新闻今夜谈
头条新闻
马桶安全管理局今日遇难题 An embarrassing day for the Toilet Safety Administration.
一位不明身份的恐怖分子 Shock and outrage issued after an unknown terrorist
成功携带枪支和婴儿闯过桶安局安检系统 managed to get through TSA security
且未放下马桶座圈 with a gun and a baby
引人震惊愤怒 leaving the toilet seat up.
桶安局负责人对此发表讲话 The head of TSA operations had this to say.
去屎 Shit.
同时愤怒的群众宣称他们终于 Meanwhile outraged civilians are claiming they are finally
受够了政府过分的官僚主义 fed up with the overblown government bureaucracy.
桶安局都不能保护我们 What good is the TSA
留着还有什么用 if they're not protecting us.
如果恐怖分子可以这样挟持人质 Why are we giving up freedom
携带婴儿和枪支如厕 if a terrorist can take a hostage on the bathroom
我们为什么还要放弃自由 with a baby and a gun in the toilet.
而且 还没放下马桶座圈 And the toilet seat was up.
我们站出来是因为政府剥夺了我们的尊严 We all stood by as mother government is taking our dignity.
说得好 That's right!
如今 是时候对自己负责了 Now it's time for us to take responsibility for ourselves.
是时候长大了 It is time for us all to grow up.
说得好 That's right.
是时候为起诉祭而战了 It is time for a suance.
等等 什么 Wait, what?
起诉祭是毛玩意 What the fuck is a suance?
汤姆 我在南方公园法庭外 Tom, I'm outside of the south park courthouse
专家们已成功传唤 where experts have successfully summoned
马桶发明者约翰·哈灵顿 the ghost of toilet inventer John Harrington.
既然他的亡灵已经到来 Now that the spirit has crossed over from the Dead,
律师们也将开始审讯 正式起诉他 lawyers are going to trial and sue him.
托马斯·哈灵顿爵士 您的巨大过失 Sir Thomas Harrington, your extreme negligence
让纳税人损失惨重 has cost taxpayers millions.
非也 非也 No, no.
你将会被起诉 亡灵 You will be sued, Spirit.
对此事件负全责 The liability is without question.
在法庭上现身吧 哈灵顿 Appear before this court, Harrington.
绝不 Never.
大家快点 把所有的钱都拿出来 Quick everyone, get out all your money.
克莱德 Ahhh, Clyde.
克莱德 Clyde.
妈妈 Mom?
这个律师是个骗子 This lawyer is a fraud.
他一直在骗取你和你朋友的钱 He has been swindling you and your friends for your money.
妈逼啊 见鬼了 Fucking me. It's a ghost.
你不能起诉死人 克莱德 You can't sue the dead, Clyde.
放下座圈是基本礼节 Putting the toilet seat down is a matter of simple etiquette.
这是常识 克莱德 It's common sense, Clyde.
又来了 Oh boy here we go.
别把妈妈的死归咎他人 Don't try to blame mommy's death on anything but your failure
这都是是因为你没有做到我一再要求你做的事 to do something I asked you time and time again to do.
都是你的错 It's your fault.
都给我把嘴闭上 Hold on just a second!
这不是任何人的错 It's not anyone's fault.
我受够了你们对我发明的 I am sick and tired of all this nonsense
陶瓷坐便器的一派胡言 over my porcelin toilet machine.
是他 There he is.
约翰·哈灵顿爵士 Sir John Harrington.
赶紧起诉他 Quick sue him.
你不能起诉我 You can't sue me.
你们根本没有正确使用我的发明 You're all using my toilet invention the wrong way.
当你坐着方便时 When you have to sit and take a sir harrington,
应该面朝这边 这样才可以在这个小架子上 you're suppose to face this way, so you can use the littte shelf
放书 放笔 放墨水 for your books, your quill and your ink.
早跟你们说了 马桶要这么坐 I told you, you should sit on it that way.
早跟你们说了 I told you.
我的设计怎么可能是 Why would I design it so that
等你们方便之后 when you finishing taking a sir harrington
还得站起来 转过身 you have to stand up and turn around
看着排泄物被冲走 and look at your sir harrington to flush.
也太恶心了 That's gross.
但如果你这样坐 But if you sit on it that way
就得把整条裤子脱下来啊 you gonna to take your pants all the way off.
那当然 我不然我为什么要设计 Of course, why do you think I designed
带着洗衣孔的卫生间啊 toilet rooms with a laundry hole.
这个孔是这个意思啊 That's what that hole is for?
克莱德妈妈的鬼魂不停地说 So, Clyde's mom ghost is all like,
"克莱德 我跟你怎么说的啊" "Clyde, what I have told you,"
"克莱德 你这蠢货" "Clyde, you asshole."
而克莱德就说 And Clyde is all like,
"妈妈 放过我吧' "Mom, leave me alone"
"我 求你了" "I'm...please..."
我可没这么说 That's not what I said.
我就是很高兴桶安局终于解散了 I'm just glad that stupid TSA craps are over with.
我知道你这个星期不好过 克莱德 I know you have a tough week, Clyde
但至少你妈妈不是白白牺牲的 but at least your mom didn't die for nothing.
我是说 我们又回到了 I mean, we came right back to the bathroom
"厕所是美国人最后的自由之地"的时代了 being the last place of American freedom.
所以严格来说 你妈算是白死了 So technically you mom did die for nothing.
克莱德 克莱德 But, Clyde...Clyde
克莱德 你在吗 Clyde... Are you there?