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I'm going down to south park gonna have myself a time
Friendly faces everywhere humble folks without temptation
Going down to south park gonna leave my woes behind
Ample parking day or night people shouting howdy neighbor
Heading on out to south park gonna see if I can't unwind
I like girls with big vaginas I like girls with big fat titties
Come on down to south park and meet some friends of mine.
《南方公园》第16季 第09集 South Park Season 16 Episode 09 "提高下限"
找到合适的接球手套没 卡特曼 You find a good catcher's mitt, Cartman?
为什么打棒球的时候 Dude, how come when we play Baseball
我老是做接球手啊 I always have to be the catcher?
因为你的协调性很好 反应相当快 Well, because you've got good coordination, sharp reflexes,
而且你特么的很胖 And you're fucking fat.
我不胖 凯尔 I'm not fat, Kyle.
好吧 你不胖 Right, you're not fat.
靠 我真不胖 Dude, I'm not fat.
我可没像那个蠢妞一样开着代步车到处逛 I don't drive around on a mobility scooter like that bitch.
哇靠 Whoa, dude.
上帝啊 你连买糖都不能下来走两步吗 Jesus Christ, you can't even walk down an aisle to buy your candy?
借过 Excuse me.
明白了吧 See what I mean?
现在在沃尔玛里走着走着 You can't even walk around Walmart anymore
就要被一些鸡巴肥屌碾来碾去 without getting run over by some fat dick on a rascal!
他们怎么能让这些东西进店里呢 Why do they even allow those things in stores?
他们不仅允许 They don't just allow them,
还在门口免费提供呢 They have them available at the front.
你逗我呢吧 You gotta be kidding me.
天呐 你们快看啊 Oh my god you guys, look at this!
玉米糖夹心奥利奥 Candy corn Oreos.
玉米糖夹心的奥利奥 Oreos with candy corn filling.
太特么的爽了 Holy hell yes.
你不是吧 Are you serious?
看看周围 你不觉得发愁吗 Look around, doesn't this bother you at all?!
哪天你就是那样子 死胖子 That's you one day, fat ass.
不只是哪一天哦 Not even one day!
如果你不做些改变 If you don't change something,
你一年后就会胖成那个德行 that's you in about a year!
那是玉米糖夹心奥利奥吗 Are those candy corn Oreos?
是的 是的 给你吧 Yeah, yeah. Here you go.
翻译：东篱把酒 Foxer 小黑 原子蛋
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校对：原子蛋 时间轴：今
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后期：凉风有信 总监：原子蛋
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凯尔 我能进来一下吗 Hey Kyle, could I come in for a second?
怎么了 Why?
我想了很久 I've been doing a lot of thinking,
关于你在沃尔玛说的那番话 about what you said at Walmart.
你是对的 凯尔 You're right, Kyle.
我很胖 I'm fat.
这些年你一直在告诫我 All these years you telling me
而我只是搪塞说 and me saying
"不 我是骨架大" 'no, I'm big Boned'
或者 "不 这只是肌肉" or 'no, that's just Muscle',
只是我在逃避现实罢了 It was always just me living in denial.
我他妈很胖 凯尔 I'm fucking fat, Kyle.
我他妈就是个死胖子 I'm fucing fat ass.
卡特曼 我在沃尔玛说的只是 Cartman, all I was trying to tell you at Walmart was that--
不 没事的 凯尔 No, it's okay Kyle.
我不能跟那些胖得下不了地 Because I'm not gonna live like some slug
连家门都出不了的懒人一样活着 who can't even leave the house because he can't get around.
既然我能承认到自己很胖 Now that I can admit I'm fat.
那我就得下定决心做些改变 I've decided to finally do something about it.
帅吧 Sweeeeet.
不是吧 Oh no!
不知道为什么自己拖了这么久 老弟 Don't know what took me so long, Dude,
我就多长了几斤肉 All I needed was a few extra pounds
保险公司就赔了我个新的私人代步车 and the insurance company paid for my own private one.
看 前面还有个放玉米糖奥利奥的篮子 See it's got a basket on the front for candy corn Oreos!
你不需要坐这个 You don't need that!
快下来 Get off of it!
老弟 这很酷啊 Dude it's sweet.
你知不知道现在四处都有代步车专用通道 Did you know they make access for mobility scooters everywhere?
我可以轻松地从床上到沃尔玛 I can seriously go from my bed to Walmart
一次都不用着地 and never have to touch a floor once!
我可不是让你这样做改变的 卡特曼 That's not what I meant by doing something about it, Cartman!
没法 Hmm, I can't --
好像没法进你家厕所呀 凯尔 can't seem to get into your bathroom kyle.
什么 What?!
这就有问题了呀 凯尔 Yeah, no, this is a problem, Kyle.
你得给我的代步车修个通道去厕所呀 You've got to make your bathroom accessible for my mobility scooter
不然我就没法在你家拉屎了 or else I won't be able to take a shit in your house.
那就去别处拉屎去 So take a shit somewhere else!
这样不符合国家的规定 凯尔 That's not the way this country works, Kyle.
你家的厕所要能让我的电动滑板通行才行呀 Your bathroom has to be to code for my mobility scooter.
这是法律规定 It's the law.
这是怎么了啊 What's going on down here?
貌似我没法在你家 Can't seem to be able to
上大号了 布洛夫斯基先生 take a dump in your house, Mr. Broflovski.
似乎达不到无障碍通行标准啊 Doesn't appear to be handicap accessible.
这次我就放过你 I'll look past it this time,
不过你最好按规定修修厕所 but you better get that bathroom up to code
否则就要吃官司了 if you don't want a lawsuit.
好了 我要去试试能不能在百思买拉屎了 Well, I'm off to go try and take a shit at Best Buy, guys.
回见 凯尔 See ya, Kyle!
没人理解当个胖子有多痛苦 Nobody understands how embarrassing it is to live with obesity.
别挡路 Out of the way.
请别挡路 Out of the way, please.
不论你去哪里 都被区别对待 Wherever you go, you're treated differently.
我建议您去窗边的大桌就座 Uh, I guess take that big booth by the window.
这会让你感觉不一样 You're made to feel different.
觉得自己不像是个正常人 To feel like less of a person.
我觉得非常耻辱 I feel so much shame.
我能做的 就是周末飞到迪斯尼乐园玩 All I can do is try to make myself feel a little better
让自己觉得好受些 by flying to Disneyland on the weekends.
好了 终于要准备开始登机了 Okay we are finally going to start with preboarding.
哪位需要特别通道登机吗 Anyone needing special assistance getting on the aircraft?
借过 Coming through.
真是太不好意思了 Oh how humiliating.
丛林巡航 等待时间 45分钟
但是即使是在迪斯尼乐园 But even at Disneyland,
我还是会被我的体重所困扰 I get reminded of my weight.
抱歉 我要去队伍前面 Excuse me, gotta go to the front of the line.
真是太不好意思了 Oh what shame I feel.
天呐 瞧我胖得 Oh geez look how fat I am.
真是受尽屈辱啊 I am just mortified you guys.
不敢相信 喂 Can't believe I-- Ay!
搞什么飞机啊 What the fuck is this?
这是胖子专用队列吗 There's a wait for the rascal line?!
中间那个小孩 一点都不胖 Hey, hey that kid in the middle isn't even fat.
看看他呀 Look at him!
他不能在胖子队里待着 He's got no right to be on a rascal!
你可别想混进去 混蛋 You're not fooling anybody, asshole
去队伍后面排着 walk to the back of the line!
我没有腿 I don't have legs.
行吧 你的胳膊可是骨瘦如柴 Yeah, well, you got skinny arms.
迪士尼乐园也不能让我减少羞耻感 And then even Disneyland can't take away the shame.
那些忍受着肥胖困扰的人们 As all the people suffering from obesity
好像是隐形了一般被大家忽视 are ignored like we're invisible.
抱歉 让一让 Excuse me. Move it.
为了摆脱这些 法官大人 And so to go through all that, Your Honor.
摆脱这些耻辱以及日日的嘲讽 To go through all the shame and daily ridicule
然而却不能在百思买 拉一泡屎 and then not be able to take a simple shit at Best Buy...
在百思买 不好意思 at Best Buy, I'm sorry,
某个百思买的经理跟我说 to be told by some Best Buy manager
我的代步车进不了他们的厕所 that your mobility scooter can't fit in their bathroom.
天呐 真抱歉 Oh god, excuse me.
这是红果果的歧视啊 It's just so belittling, you know?
法官大人 我只是想上个大号而已 All I wanted to do was take a dump, your honor.
在我遭遇了这些之后 After all I've been through,
难道还不能在百思买上个大号吗 can't I just take a dump at Best Buy?
今天发生多起诉讼 More lawsuits today as people on
因为使用代步车的人们抱怨无处拉屎 mobility scooters claim they have nowhere to poo.
业主被强制要求改造其厕所 Property owners are being ordered to modify their bathrooms,
此举将花费数百万税款 costing tax payers millions.
此举的反对者们推到滑板车 Opponents of the measure are expressing their outrage
以表达其愤怒 by engaging in the act of rascal tipping.
住手孩子们 住手 住手 Stop it you kids! Stop! Stop!
政府警告说此种行为非常危险 The government warns that rascal tipping can be dangerous
可能导致肥胖人群 and may lead to fat people shitting their pants
在地上蹬腿尖叫时拉裤子 as they kick and scream on the floor.
为应对该危险 To counter the crisis,
卫生署请求拨款两千五百万 the Department of Health has called for $25 million in aid
以保证所有代步车均能装配一个翻身助手 so that all mobility scooters can be fitted with a tip assist device.
哦耶 给力 Oh yeah. Nice.
这个很不错 Yeah, that works pretty well.
特么开什么玩笑 You have got to be kidding me!
你说什么 凯尔 What Kyle?
我们不该浪费时间和金钱 We should not be wasting time and money
保证卡特曼的肥仔车不会被推翻 making sure Cartman's fat scooter can't be tipped over!
你居然容忍恶意推翻 凯尔 You condone rascal tipping Kyle?!
你知不知道全国上下 Do you know that all over our country,
所有用代步车的人正在受害吗 people in mobility scooters are being victimized?!
那你他妈就滚下来 把它们抬起来 So get off your fucking scooters and pick them up!
听到他说的了吗 Did you hear him?!
这正是阿黛尔所说的 This is exactly what Adele is talking about!
阿黛尔·阿德金斯 英国独立歌手 横扫六项格莱美大奖 体型偏胖
我们的文化崇尚少食 Our culture celebrates anorexia,
想让我们耻于没有苗条的腹部 and tries to make us ashamed if we don't have slim stomachs
和傲人的双峰 就像凯尔一样 and perky little tits, like Kyle!
大家听好 我不会再为胖而感到丢人 Well everyone, I'm gonna stop feeling ashamed just because
不会像凯尔一样一天跑六趟厕所 Kyle throws up in the bathroom six times a day
就为了让自己看起来像个封面人物 to make sure he looks good on his magazine covers!
你才该为自己感到丢人 凯尔 You should be ashamed of yourself, Kyle.
去吃你的伪娘饼和基佬鱼吧 Eating your ladkies and gafeltafish
再用手伸进胃里把它们抠出来 and then putting your fingers down your throat
就因为别人告诉你该长什么样 because society tells you how to look!
我再也不会觉得羞耻了 I'm not feeling shame anymore!
从现在开始 我要光明正大地 From now on I am going to shop sitting down
坐着购物 还要插队 and skip to the front of lines with my head held high!
有人需要用代步车并不意味着 Just because someone needs a mobility scooter
他们就是愚昧无知的白人垃圾 凯尔 doesn't mean they're an ignorant piece of white trash, Kyle!
我也许是胖 但我可不是啵啵宝贝 I may be fat but I'm not Honey Boo Boo!
啵啵宝贝是谁 Who's Honey Boo Boo?
哥们 连啵啵宝贝都不知道 Dude, you never see Honey Boo Boo?
我是啵啵宝贝 I'm Honey Boo Boo.
我是个大美女 贱人们 And I'm a beauty queen. Bitches!
我肥得一逼 但我毫不在意 I'm fat as a whale and I don't give two shits, girl!
她最喜欢的食物是黄油意大利面 Her favorite foods are sketti and butter.
她爱喝红牛和激浪 And she likes drinkin' Red Bull and Mountain Dew.
我才六岁就已经三次突发心脏病了哦 I'm only six and I've already had three heart attacks girlfriend!
挺住 Come on!
坚持住 啵啵 Come on now boo boo!
快起来向评委们挥手 Now get up and wave to them judges!
我们并不以我们的体重为耻 We ain't got no shame about our weight
因为它让我们脸皮也变厚了 cuz our weight makes us sassy.
天呐 Jesus, dude.
到底发生了什么 What's happened?
就好像什么东西降低了底线 It's like something's lowered the bar to the point
导致人们都不知廉耻了 that nobody feels any shame any more.
跟底线不一样 Well dude, it's not like the bar.
这是真实存在的东西 It's actual, physical thing.
美国詹姆斯·卡梅隆号
詹姆斯·卡梅隆 著名电影导演 2012年3月29日 詹姆斯·卡梅隆进行了首次单人下潜至马里亚纳海沟最深处的探险
就是这里 This is it.
降低速度 Throttle down!
卡梅隆先生 您没必要这么做 Mr. Cameron you don't have to do this.
为啥不回你马里布的豪宅 Why don't you just go back to your house in Malibu?
好好创作下一部电影 Go work on another movie.
我必须要这么做 I have to do this.
我必须要试着升起它 I have to try and raise it.
降低的不是底线啊 卡梅隆先生 The bar isn't something that actually lowers, Mr. Cameron.
那你怎么解释那些用代步车的胖子们 Then how do you explain all the fat people on mobility scooters?
你怎么解释啵啵宝贝 How do you account for Honey Boo Boo?!
底线已经降到了我们都无法了解的深度 The bar has been lowered to depths we can't even fathom.
如果有人能去那儿把它升起来 If anyone can go down there and raise it back.
那就是我 It's me.
释放 Let her go!
紫外线灯 打开 UV Lights on.
压力系统工作正常 Pressure system is normal.
音乐 打开 Music on.
*他叫詹姆斯 詹姆斯·卡梅隆* *His name is James- James cameron!*
*最勇敢的开拓者* *The bravest pioneer!*
*没有高昂的预算 没有深邃的海洋* *No budget too steep. No sea too deep.*
*他是谁 就是他 詹姆斯·卡梅隆* *Who's that? It's him - James Cameron!*
系统正常 Systems are normal.
你们在上面听得清楚歌吗 You guys hearing the song OK up there?
*詹姆斯 詹姆斯·卡梅隆* *James- James cameron!*
*海洋的探索者* *Explorer of the sea.*
是的 詹姆斯 我们听见歌了 Yes, James, we hear the song.
正在下潜到一千英尺 Descending to one thousand feet.
还没有看见底线 I don't see the bar yet.
看起来它沉到很深了 Looks like it must have sunk pretty low.
*英勇无畏 勇于争先* *With a dying thirst to be the first.*
*会是谁 就是他 詹姆斯·卡梅隆* *Could it be? It's him- James cameron!!*
快点 里面赶紧的 Come on! Hurry it up in there!
是的 不错 Oh yeah that's good.
现在可以过来了 That's accessible now.
不错 让我赶紧来一泡屎先 Cool, let me take a shit in this real quick.
这简直是太过分了 This has gone far enough!
怎样才能让人们知道对肥胖敏感和 How can we make people see the difference between being
让胖子们任意践踏我们的不同呢 sensitive to obesity and letting fat people walk all over us?
是的 我们需要的是能提高意识的东西 Yeah, what we need is something to raise awareness.
是的 我们必须提高人们的意识 Yeah, we gotta raise people's awareness.
用类似纪录片的东西 Something like a documentary.
比如 拍摄卡特曼的点点滴滴 You know, follow Cartman around with a video camera
然后把他的烂事都弄上电视 and then get all his bullshit on television.
对 纪录片吗 Yeah! A documentary?
至少这样可以表达我们的担忧 At least then we'd be voicing our concerns.
你仔细想想看 I mean if you think about it,
如果我们只是抱怨而不拿出实际行动的话 we should feel some shame for just
我们自己也应当感到羞愧 complaining about it and not doing anything.
你说的好像没错 Yeah I guess you're kind of right.
这样吧 Hey tell you what.
要是你愿意跟踪卡特曼 If you wanna follow Cartman around
偷拍他 and get video of him,
我就把它们做成纪录片 I'll pay to make it into a documentary
拿去播出 and get it on the air.
真的吗 Really?
谢啦兄弟 Thanks dude!
我去买个摄像机 I'm gonna go get a video camera!
托肯 Hey token.
你要叫凯尔给你拍那些东西的话 If you're gonna have Kyle video that stuff for you,
至少应该告诉他真相 you should probably tell him the truth.
他不需要知道真相 He doesn't need to know the truth.
这件事对我们两个人来说是双赢 Kyle will get what he wants and so will I.
女士们先生们 Ladies and gentlemen,
我们国家流行病盛行 we have an epidemic in our country.
肥胖问题消耗了纳税人无数的钱 Obesity is costing taxpayers millions
而一些人正在恶意利用制度的漏洞 and some are taking advantage of a system that is flawed.
前几天 Over the past several days
我录下了一个实例 I have filmed one such case,
我的搭档 托肯 and the shocking video
制作出了这部触目惊心的纪录片 has been edited by my partner, Token.
我们希望 It is our hope that this film
这部片子能让大家意识到事件的严重性 that this film will cast light on a serious issue.
黑人托肯出品 Token Blaaaaack productions.
他肥胖 He's chubby!
他恶心 He's filthy!
他还有点神经 And he's a little bit nuts.
他就是 新美国甜心 Heeere he is, America's new Sweetheart,
胖小嘟嘟 Fatty Doo Doo!
胖小嘟嘟 Fatty Doo Doo?
谁是骑滑板车代步的胖小嘟嘟 Who's that scootin' on a scooter Fatty Doo Doo?
谁像骑代步车的嘟嘟一样肥嘟嘟 Who's got doo doo like a fatty scoot-dee doo?
什么 What?
没人跟你一样肥嘟嘟要踩嘟嘟 Nobody scoots a fatty doo like you do.
吃得多多 Scatty foo foo.
拉得多多 Patty poo poo.
白人总统 黑人总统 我不关心 White President, black President, I don't care.
坐上滑板车 我自由自在 Just scoot me up some doo doo and I'll be right there.
我只知道五个调 I only know five chords.
进来 Come in.
你都干了什么 What have you done?
我帮你做了个纪录片 凯尔 I've helped you make a documentary Kyle.
我说的纪录片是 When we said documentary
新闻60分那种 I Thought we meant 60 minutes!
不是啵啵宝贝那种 Not honey boo boo!
凯尔 我在努力制作吸引眼球的节目 Kyle, Kyle, I'm trying to make Compelling television.
你请了兰迪·纽曼来唱主题歌 You got Randy Newman to do the theme song.
显然还不够努力 You're not trying that hard.
托肯 你是个好孩子 Token, you're a good kid.
你怎么能制作出一部 How can you sit there and
一个肥胖孩子慢性自杀的节目 collect money on a show that's
然后还安心地坐在这里数钱呢 about a fat child killing himself?!
你就没羞耻感吗 Where is your sense of shame?!
我还清晰地记得 I can remember exactly when I was
第一次看啵啵宝贝的时候 the first time I saw honey boo boo.
我根本就不敢相信自己的眼睛 I couldn't believe what I was seeing.
一个可耻的肥胖家庭 A shameful, fat family eating
吃垃圾食品等死 white trash food to their deaths.
然后我发现这档节目 And then I saw what network it was on
居然在学习频道播出 'the learning channel'.
如果他们觉得这样没问题 If they can feel okay about that,
那我也没问题 why can't I?
当道德下限下降时 When the bar gets lowered, Token,
我们都要付出代价的 we all pay the price.
如果啵啵宝贝是一个黑人小女孩呢 What if honey boo boo was a little black girl?
被她的妈妈喂胖 Being fattened up by her mom and
坐在那里谈论吃的东西 talking about grits and hominy.
但她不是黑人 凯尔 But she's not black, kyle.
她是白人 She's white.
下限是由社会决定的 凯尔 The bar is determined by society, kyle.
你根本就没有办法去提升它 And it's not something that can just be raised up.
任何人都不行 Not by us or anyone else.
你们看见了没 Are you guys seeing this?!
我们看见了 卡梅隆先生 Yes, we see, Mr. Cameron.
若干年前 道德下限就在这里 This is where the bar was just a few years ago.
当年的下限降到这里 It was lowered here when
因为克林顿总统在总统办公室里玩口交 President Clinton got a blowjob in the oval office
然后那些经常在巷子里吹箫的人 and suddenly men who were just getting blowjobs in alleyways
突然觉得自己的行为也没什么大不了 thought they weren't all that bad.
但明显有某种东西让底线降得更低了 But clearly something else has lowered the bar even more!
我要再往下潜 I must go deeper!
位置和角度恰到好处 We're in the pipe - five by five.
我不知道该怎么办 I just don't know what to do.
我真心痛恨卡特曼 I mean, I hate Cartman with all my heart,
可我却总是因为自己利用了他而感到羞耻 but I can't help feeling ashamed for taking advantage of him.
我应该感到羞耻吗 But should I feel shame?
下限降低了 又不是我的错 Whatever lowered the bar it's not my fault.
但如果我继续下去的话 So if I kind of go with it,
是不是对卡特曼不公平呢 is it really unfair to Cartman?
应该不是 I guess not.
但你到底想干吗呢 But what is it exactly you're trying to do?
你懂的嘛 就是用他赚点钱嘛 Just you know make some money off him.
就像啵啵宝贝那样 Like honey boo boo.
兄弟 Dude!
兄弟 这样不行 Dude not cool.
干嘛 What?
你没听说吗 Haven't you heard what happened?
啵啵宝贝的心脏不行了 Honey boo boo's heart gave out.
什么 What?
我的天 Oh my god.
真的 真的很严重 Yeah, dude, it's really serious.
医生说啵啵宝贝需要心脏移植手术 Well the doctors said honey boo boo needs a heart transplant.
他们要给她做个手术 They're gonna do a surgery and
换个猪心进去 put a pig heart in her,
我们现在去农场挑头猪 so we're going to the ranch to pick out a hog.
我要换猪心了 I'm gettin' a pig hearrrrrt!
如果啵啵宝贝换了猪心 If honey boo boo is gonna do
还想继续参加选美的话 Pageants with a pig heart,
我们就要挑一头潇洒猪 we wanna pick a hog that has pizazz
要知道怎么卖弄的那种 and knows how to work it girl.
我要那只 I want that one!!!
这只吗 This'n here?!
你要这只 You want this'n?!
对 不 等等 Yeah! Naw wait!
那边的一头猪朝我白了白眼 That pig over there gave me the evil eye!
我要那只 I want that one!
这只吗 This'n?!
要这只吗 This'n right cheer?!
你要这只 You 'ant this'n?!
我要那头猪的心脏 I want that one's heart it
它看着我的样子很搞笑 Looked at me funny!
我们在手术室里已经两小时了 We've been in the O.R. About two hours already.
我希望以后选美比赛的评委 I just hope when she does her
不要因为她换了个猪心 Pageants the judges don't take away points
而扣她的分 cuz she's got pig heart.
啵啵宝贝 Honey boo boo!
干吗 What?!
评委问起你心脏的事 What you gonna tell them judges
你怎么说 if they ask you about your heart?!
我会跟他们说 I'm gonna tell em 'my heart is
"我的心儿比熏肉好吃呢" sweeter than bacon, child!'
谁想吃面面和黄油 Who wants sketti and butter!?
她现在有猪心脏了 She's got a pig heart now
就以为自己是肥猪了 she thinks she's a pacaderm.
给大家看看你的疤 Show em' yer scar!
这是我的疤 我换了猪心脏 This' my scar cuz I got a pig heart!
多一个疤多一层厚皮 My scar makes me sassy, child!
卡梅隆号 我是詹姆斯·卡梅隆 S.S. Cameron, this is James Cameron.
我现在一万六千英尺的地方 I am now at 16,000 feet.
这里到处冰冷黑暗 You should see the cold, darkness of it all.
一片孤寂 却令人敬畏的浩瀚海底 The Isolation and yet awe of the sea's magnitude.
我下沉到的这个底线比任何人的都要低 I have now sunk deeper than any human has ever been before!
在大海深处 唯一的出路就是 Way out here in the ocean depths
往下 往下 再往下 Going deep deep deep.
詹姆斯·卡梅隆 你好啊 Oh hey James Cameron!
搞什么飞机 What the fuck?
降得如此低 I've been divin' in the deep
感觉真便宜 and I'm feelin' so cheap.
纽曼 你个杂种 You son of a bitch Newman!
你怎么比我还低啊 How did you beat me down here?!
我可不想让谁更上一层楼 I don't want anyone raising the bar
不然就没人会请我了 cuz nobody'll hire me.
在这海洋中 往下 往下 往下 Deep deep deep in the ocean.
来吧 Ooh, come on.
来比赛呀 卡梅隆 Fight me Cameron.
好 你个杂种 Alright you son of a bitch.
送你上西天 I'll take you to hell!!!
这侵害了我的公民权利 托肯 It is a violation of my civil rights, Token,
你应该感到羞耻 and you should be ashamed of yourself!
抱歉 托肯 我必须告诉他 I'm sorry Token I had to tell him.
他现在身处危险 His life is in danger.
利用别人的不便来赚钱 Making money off of people's handicaps!
托肯 请参见我的律师 Well, Token, I would like you to meet my lawyer!
等他进来了 As soon as he gets in here,
他就会给你一个停止和禁止令的 he will be handing you a cease and desist order.
那个节目不会播出了 That show is not going to air!
其实昨晚已经播了 It actually aired last night.
你找到买家了 You found a network to buy it?
是的 不过不必担心 Yeah. But don't worry,
节目影响力也不是很大 it didn't go so good.
我们的收视率被啵啵宝贝比下去了 We got killed in the ratings by Honey Boo Boo.
什么 What?!
我被那个小贱人给比下去了 That little bitch beat me in the ratings?!
怎么能这样 Oh hellllll no!
这只是我们这一季的第一集而已 所以 Well, it was only our first show of the season so you really can't...
我他妈不干 I don't give a shit, dude!
没人能比过我 Nobody beats my ratings!
给我订机票 我要那个贱人好看 Get me a plane ticket that bitch is going down!
欢迎来到 第一夫人 关于肥胖 的 讨论会
欢迎来到第一夫人关于肥胖的讨论会 We welcome you to the first Lady's symposium on obesity.
欢迎我们的发言人 With your key note speaker,
米歇尔·奥巴马 Michelle Obama.
我们国家流行病盛行 Our country is in the midst of an Epidemic.
最近一个非常重大的冲突引起了我的注意 Recently a very big conflict was brought to my attention.
这个冲突反应出了 A conflict that illustrates without a doubt
我们国家当务之急需要解决的事宜 what should be our nation's number one priority.
我们国家应该怎么办 What will we do as a country?
我无法给出答案 I cannot give you any easy answers.
但我可以给出 But what I can give you
大家所期待的 is what we've all been waiting for!
啵啵宝贝对阵胖小嘟嘟 Honey Boo Boo VS. Fatty Poo Poo!!!!!
你死定了 小贱 You're going down, bitch!
没人能抢我的收视率 Nobody takes my ratings!
不错 胖子 That's good fatty!
快生气 Get pissed!
我很生气 I am pissed!
好样的 胖子 Yeah, fatty!
我很胖 我很生气 Yeah I am fat and I'm pissed!
没人能在面面摔跤上打败我的啵啵 Ain't nobody can beat my Boo Boo at sketti wrestling!
开始吧 Let's do this!
我跟你没完 小贱 I ain't done with you, bitch.
翻身助手 好样的 Yea tip assist!
你说他死了没 You think he's dead?
但愿 I hope so.
卡梅隆号 S.S. Cameron!
我是詹姆斯·卡梅隆 This is James Cameron!
我找到了 I've found it!!!
天哪 我找到底线了 My god I've found the bar!
转移所有动力给子系统 Divert all power to subsystems!
只有百分之二的氧气了 2 percent oxygen left!!!!
底线太沉了 The bar is too heavy!!!!
加油啊 麻痹 Come on you bitch!!!!!
尼玛 Huh, I'll be damned.
哥们 没事吧 Dude, you okay?
我在想 I've been thinking,
大家是怎么变得这么不知廉耻的 how did shamelessness get to this?
从胖子们用滑板车时开始的吗 Did it start with fat people on scooters?
在那之前底线有这么低吗 Or did the bar get lowered way before that?
然后我又想 And then I started thinking
也许是我们 maybe it was us.
我也说不清 I don't know but maybe somehow
也许是我们在很久之前降低了底线 we lowered the bar a long time ago.
然后我们全都坐在这里 麻痹着 And now we're all sittin' here in the stink of it all.
回不去了 斯坦 There's no going back, Stan.
我也说不清 It's like I can't explain it.
就是突然觉得这样不好 I just suddenly feel like this isn't right.
真不知道我们一开始 I don't know why we were
为什么要来看这些垃圾玩意 watching that garbage in the first place.
奥巴马夫人 夫人 您没事吧 Mrs. Obama? Ma'am? You OK?
有点不对劲 Something's wrong.
这 全都不对 This -- this is all wrong.
够了 都够了 Stop! Everyone!
这都是在干什么 What are we doing?
你怎么能让这种事发生在自己女儿身上 How can you let this happen to your daughter?
我不知道 I don't know.
我怎么会让自己这样 How did I let myself go like this?
我都做了什么 What have I done?!
我们什么时候开始看胖小孩面面摔跤了 When did we devolve into watching fat kids sketti wrestling?
我们必须清楚 肥胖是流行 We need to realize obesity is an epidemic.
但不是病 But it's not a disease.
从现在起 From now on,
我要加强管理 I'm going to dedicate this administration
打败儿童肥胖问题 to fighting childhood obesity!
你妈了个逼 Fucking bitch!
这是怎么回事 What the hell is going on?
不知道 I don't know.
我觉得这是个机会 I think we've been given another chance.
卡梅隆先生 真难以置信 Mr. Cameron, we can't believe it!
到此结束 We're done here.
准备拍《阿凡达2》 Set course for the set of Avatar 2.
卡梅隆先生 人们应该知道 Mr. Cameron, people should know
你是如何拯救了大家 how you saved us all.
你是怎么提升底线的 How you raised the bar?
人们怎么才知道你的英雄事迹呢 How will they know what a hero you are?
詹姆斯·卡梅隆不为詹姆斯·卡梅隆 James Cameron doesn't do what James Cameron does
而做詹姆斯·卡梅隆所做的事 for James Cameron.
詹姆斯·卡梅隆做詹姆斯·卡梅隆所做的事 James Cameron does what James Cameron does
是因为詹姆斯·卡梅隆就是詹姆斯·卡梅隆 because James Cameron is James Cameron.
他的名字叫 詹姆斯·卡梅隆 His name is James Cameron.