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-=YTET-伊甸园字幕组=- 翻译: 鬼糖 赵小兵 二木三白 羊咩咩 尤小游 lintianshine 校对: 阿公 时间轴: YTET- 林莳工
* 欢迎来到南方公园 享受好时光 * I'm goin' down to South Park,gonna have myself a time
* 到处都是友好的脸 * Friendly faces everywhere
* 淳朴的居民乐天知命 * Humble folks without temptation
* 来到南方公园 可不要大惊小怪 * Goin' down to South Park,gonna leave my woes behind
* 大车小车随便停 * Ample parking day or night
* 人人喊着邻居你好! * People spouting,"Howdy,neighbor!"
* 到了南方公园 看你感觉多自然 * Heading on up to South Park,gonna see if I can't unwind
* (你要听得清我说话 算你最厉害!) * Mrph rmhmhm rm!Mrph rmhmhm rm!
* 快来南方公园 让你笑口常开 * Come on down to South Park and meet some friends of mine
南方公园 第十九季 第二集 BD：Tearemix
上周我们都意识到 国内仍有歧视现象存在 Now,last week we were all reminded that intolerance still exists in our country.
这都是因为社交媒体上 一名特殊小学生的言论 It took a very special young student to light up social media.
为了感谢他 今天我们请他来到白宫 We've invited him to the White House today to show our appreciation.
从未有过谁的演讲词 像他这般宽容大度 感人肺腑 Because never have there been more tolerant,more moving words
让我们欢迎Kyle Broflovski 讲讲他的英雄Caitlyn Jenner than Kyle Broflovski's speech about his hero,Caitlyn Jenner.
(第一集中提到的变性人)
上台吧 Kyle Come on up here,Kyle.
看到了吗 就是这个 就是因为这个 You see?There!This is why it's happening.
每个人都在鼓吹思想开放 海纳百川 Everyone's preaching openness and acceptance,
然后一大堆移民还真他妈就来了 and so now millions of Goddamn immigrants are coming over the border,
还没人把这当事儿 and nobody seems to care!
但你又能怎么样呢? But what are you gonna do?
如今这世道 你还不能说非法移民的坏话 In today's world,it's like you can't even say anything negative about illegal immigrants.
谁刚才说"非法移民"了? Did somebody over here say "illegal immigrants"?
正确的说法是"未审批移民" 好吗? Because the correct term is "undocumented immigrants," all right,bro?
真没人把这当事儿! It's like nobody cares!
这群人就这么随意跨过边境 还带着他们肮脏的家人 And they just keep coming,crossing the border with their dirty families,
还一边放着他们的傻逼音乐 playing their stupid music.
好好看看吧 I mean,look at 'em!
我敢打赌他们里没一个合法过境的 I'll bet not one of them is here legally.
行了呗 伙计 All right,guy!
- 你好 伙计 - 你好 伙计 - Hey,buddy. - Hey,buddy.
嘿 发生啥了 兄弟 Hey,what's going on,friend?
嘿 伙计 又猎了头鹿是吧 Hey,buddy,another Moosehead,eh?
我们就他妈该修个长城 We should have put up a Goddamn wall.
等等 我还有话要说 But wait.There's still more.
因为这个国家由梦想者建立的 Because this country was built on dreamers.
Kyle 我们希望能帮你实现梦想 And,Kyle,we want to make your dreams come true.
所以我们请到了你的英雄 Caitlyn Jenner And so here is your hero,Caitlyn Jenner.
我只想说 谢谢你 Kyle 谢谢你用言语给我的支持 I just want to say thank you,Kyle,for your beautiful words of support.
Kyle 我们还给你准备了 另外一个小小的惊喜 Now,Kyle,we got another little surprise for you.
我们之前说会让你坐飞机回家 We told you we were flying you back home,
但其实 你会搭你英雄的车回家 But the truth is,you're getting a ride back all the way with your hero.
你喜欢这个安排吗? How do you like that?
系好安全带 小伙砸 Buckle up,buckaroo.
南方公园小学
好了孩子们 都回到自己的座位上 Okay,children,let's take our seats.
大家应该也注意到了 我国政府已经决定放任各种人... As you've probably noticed,our government has decided to let anyone
穿越我国边境 来搞垮我们的国家 who wants to cross the border and screw up our country.
我知道你们跟我一样愤怒 I know you're all as pissed off as I am,
那我们今天就讲讲曾经强盛的罗马帝国 是怎样走向灭亡的 so why don't we begin today's lesson on why the once-great empire of Rome fell to shit.
谁能告诉我罗马是如何灭亡的? Huh?Who can tell me why Rome fell to shit?
不 来个正常点的人 No,somebody who matters.
好吧 算了 那个穿黄色衣服的 All right,fine.In the yellow shirt.
哦 古罗马帝国 伙计 当时面临着不少麻烦事儿呢 伙计 The Roman Empire,buddy,was facing several issues,guy,
- 到了新世纪的时候 伙计 - 够了 讲英语 - as it reached a new millennium,friend... - Oh,speak in English!
好了 事实上是当时有一批 叫做哥特族的移民 You see,what happened is that these immigrants called the Goths
(古代日耳曼族分支)
因为罗马人同情他们 接纳了他们 were welcomed into Roman territories because some people felt bad for them.
然而哥特人却觉得他们受到压迫 好吗 And then the Goths suddenly decided they were being oppressed,you see?
所以他们就... and so they...
你他妈在做什么? What the hell are you doing?
八点整了 伙计 It's 8:00 A.M.,guy.
够了 That's it!
你们这群加拿大狗 哪儿来的滚回哪儿去! Why don't you Canucks go back where you came from?!
校长办公室
你真以为能把未登记移民 叫成"加拿大狗"吗? You really think you can refer to an undocumented immigrant as a "Canuck"?
治正校长 他们扰乱了我的课堂 在我的课上吹小号 P.C.Principal,they got up in the middle of my lecture and started playing music.
所以你是忘了每到8点和11点 So did you forget that at 8:00 and 11:00,
加拿大人都要正对东方 吹奏Chuck Mangione的曲子吗? all Canadians face east and play Chuck Mangione,
(美国小号演奏家)
还是你根本就不关心他们的宗教习俗？ or did you not care to find out about their religious customs?
他们...他们都不说英文 They...They don't even speak English.
那你就从现在起用双语教学 Then you need to be teaching in both languages from now on.
Mackey 给他报个加语夜班 Mackey,sign the faculty up for Canadian-language night classes.
什么? What?!
好的 治正校长 马上就去 Yes,P.C.Principal!R-right away!M'kay.
你给我小心点儿 Garrison You're on thin ice,Garrison.
遵守校规 不然你就别干了 Get in line,or you'll be out of a job,bro.
他们现在在做什么? What are they doing now?
他们在一起吃饭 祈祷 Well,they're all eating together and praying,
而且他们居然往芝士通心粉上放糖浆 and they're putting syrup on their mac and cheese.
太怪了 So weird.
他们人好多 There's just so many of them.
哥几个 我觉得这整件事就是个阴谋 You guys,I think this whole thing is a conspiracy.
- 什么意思 - 想想最近这些事 - What do you mean? - Think about what happened.
美国这几年边境保安措施都很严格 America had pretty secure borders for years.
Kyle那段讲宽容大度的演讲 已经传疯了 Kyle gives a big speech about tolerance and acceptance that goes viral.
一群加拿大人非法入境 A bunch of Canadians cross the border illegally.
Kyle的弟弟是加拿大人 Kyle's brother is Canadian.
Kyle会不会是故意做那个演讲 好让这些非法移民入境呢? What if Kyle knowingly gave that speech to get all the illegals in?
我就坐在这呢 I'm sitting right here.
而且他就坐在这儿 And he's sitting right here.
你真认为光凭我的演说 就能引来一大堆非法移民吗? You really think just my speech brought on a wave of illegal immigration?
哥们儿 你确实做得有点过了 You did kind of go overboard,dude.
啥意思? What?
我知道你愿意做些演讲啥的 It's just,I know you like giving speeches and stuff,
但不是所有事都是非黑即白的 but not everything is black and white.
是啊 你到处去夸Caitlyn Jenner没问题 Yeah,I mean,it's fine you want to go preach about Caitlyn Jenner,
但你不能以偏概全 鼓励大家为所欲为 but you can't just make blanket statements about letting anyone do whatever they want.
- 又不是我想去演讲的! - 对对 很有意思 - I didn't even want to give that speech! - Yeah,yeah.
你们有没有读过<创世纪>34章? This is interesting.Have you guys read Genesis 34?
特有意思 在<创世纪>34章里 Well,it's intriguing,because in Genesis 34,
犹太人做的那些事儿 跟Kyle现在做的差不多 the Jews actually did something similar to what Kyle's doing now.
这跟我一点关系都没有! I'm not responsible for this.
非法移民现象一直都有 Illegal immigration has been happening forever.
只不过现在更多 But it's happening a lot more now,
在你决定对Caitlyn Jenner 大夸特夸之后 after you decide to give a big speech about Caitlyn Jenner
因为你想要搞垮美国的文化根基 because you want to bring down the cultural fabric of America
因为你是犹太人 'Cause you're a Jew.
伙计们 移民不论是合法还是非法的 You guys,immigrants,either legal or illegal,
他们总会想办法进入富裕的国家 are always gonna find ways to cross into richer countries...
- 哎呀 天哪 又来了 - 我走了 - Oh,boy.Here we go again. - Yeah,I'm out.
我不想再听一遍了 Yeah,sorry.I can't listen to another one either.
各位晚上好 Happy evening,friends.
我是Stkrdknmibalz老师 由我来教你们加拿大语 My name is Mr.Stkrdknmibalz,and we are going to learn Canadian.
经过系统的训练 你们就会发现 加拿大语其实很简单 With a lot of practice,you're going to find that speaking Canadian isn't so difficult,
实际上我们的字母表 跟你们的也很像 and in fact,our alphabet and yours are fairly similar.
先让我们一起来唱一遍吧 So why don't we begin singing it together?
A B C D E F 大哥 A,B,C,D E,F,Guy
H I J K L M N O 哥们 H,I,J,K L,M,N,O,Buddy
Q R S T U 朋友 Q,R,S T,U,Friend
W X 哎 和 噗! W,X,Eh,and Pbht!
这就是加拿大的字母表 These are Canadian ABCs
Susie喜欢多毛的蛋 你们觉得这对怎么样? Susie likes hairy balls What do ya think of these?
好了 下面大家一起来 All right,now everyone.
A B C D E F 大哥 A,B,C,D E,F,Guy
H I J K L M N O 哥们 H,I,J,K L,M,N,O,Buddy
Q R S T U 朋友 Q,R,S T,U,Friend
W X 哎 和 噗! W,X,Eh,
* 我的国家去哪了? * Where has my country gone?
* 曾经到处都是机会 * * 我们团结在一起 * It was a land of opportunity that we held dear
* 但现在来了一帮混蛋 * But now all these other assholes are comin' here
* 我的国家去哪了? * And where's my country gone?
* 刚刚明明还在这儿 * It was just here like two seconds ago
* 因为他们说这里是自由的国度 * 'Cause when they said that this was the land of the free
* 我很确定他们指的是我 * I'm pretty sure that they were referring to me
* 我的国家一去不复返! * And my country's gone!
* 他很生气 于是静静离开 * It got upset,and now it's wandered away
* 换了43个总统 * * 才让我们屹立世界之巅 * It took 43 presidents to make us stand tall
* 刚来一个黑人总统 * * 一切就全都不见 * And just one black guy to unravel it all Country gone!
* 请告诉她我们需要她回家 * Please tell it that we need her back home
* 自由之桶缺了好大的一个洞 * There's a great big hole in the liberty bucket
(美国需要Garrison)
* 因为有些人忘了让外国人滚蛋 * 'Cause someone forgot to tell the foreigners to suck it
* 现在他们全在我的草坪上玩耍 * And now they're all hanging out on my lawn
* 现在又来毁掉我的歌 * And now they're ruining my song
* 听起来跟Chuck Mangione似的 * Making it sound like Chuck Mangione
* 我的国家去哪儿了? * Where my country gone?
看来这里的所有人 都害怕说出实情 Seems like everyone's afraid to speak the truth around here.
那我只好当回出头鸟 争取把这件事搞定 Well,I'm throwing my hat in and saying I'll figure this thing out.
我可能不太了解政治和移民政策 Now,I might not understand politics or immigration policies
也不太了解法律和一些基本概念 or the law or basic ideological concepts.
但是去他妈的 我只知道 这里突然出现了好多加拿大人 But damn it,I understand there's a bunch of Canadians here,
我要做点儿什么了 and I'm gonna do something about it!
南方公园小学
好了 大家 听好了 All right,everyone,listen up.
为了增进彼此的理解 In order for better understanding,
我们请加拿大的同学 给大家介绍一下他们的文化和... we have asked students of Canadian origin to introduce you to their culture and...
喂 Leslie 你他妈给我闭嘴！ Hey,Leslie,shut your * mouth!
给大家介绍一下他们的文化和习俗 To introduce you to their culture and customs.
下面他们将带我们 领略他们多元的历史 So let's give them our undivided attention
我们一起用心感受 as they take us on a whirlwind journey through their diverse history.
我们是霍普韦尔和和阿贝内基人 加拿大最早的居民 We are the Hopewell and Abenaki,first settlers of Canadian soil,guy.
我们是法国和英国探险者 来加拿大寻找皮毛和货物 We are French and British explorers,seeking furs and goods.
我是Dan Rather 向你们播报一条新闻 Yeah,and I'm Dan Rather,and I got news for you...
(前CBS新闻主播)
这儿没人欢迎你们 Nobody wants you here!
抱歉 抱歉个屁 Sorry.Not sorry.
该有人站出来说出真相 重振我们的国家了 It's time for someone to say it like is and make our country great again.
Garrison 你以为你是谁 Garrison,what do you think you're...
我并不害怕和治正校长抗争 And I'm also not afraid to stand up to P.C.Principal.
就你 你个粉刺头 玩你妈蛋去 You,sir,have a pizza face,and you suck your mom's dick.
够了 Garrison That's it,Garrison.
你已经被南方公园小学开除了 You are fired from South Park Elementary.
看见了吧? 我被开除了 Oh,see?And now I'm fired.
这就是移民背后无情又残酷的事实 That's the cold,hard truth of immigration.
我只相信一种移民政策 就是干死他们 Well,there's only one immigration policy that I believe in,and that's * 'em all to death!
孩子们 我只是说出了在座各位的心声 I'm just saying what everyone's thinking here,kids.
抱歉 抱歉个屁 Sorry.Not sorry.
兄弟们 加拿大人生气了 Dude,the Canadians are pissed off.
可是这也怪不得他们吧? Can you really blame them?
Garrison为什么要这么做? What made Mr.Garrison do that?
伙计们 如果这一切都是 Kyle精心设计的呢? Guys,what if this was all exactly what Kyle planned?
把加拿大人搞来 让他们感觉受到排挤 然后呢? Get the Canadians here,make them feel persecuted,and then what?
会有起义 叛乱 Uprisings,rebellion.
然后 他们会把我们送进集中营 当牲口使唤 Next thing you know,they're sending us to camps and using us as livestock.
你真觉得Kyle会这么做? You really think Kyle would do that?
那不重要 That doesn't matter.
我们必须赶紧想办法解决这事儿 We have to think of a way to smooth this over fast.
是的 我们需要个象征性的联盟 Yeah,we're gonna need a symbolic union.
一个什么? A what?
那是啥片来着 两方本来有仇 You know,what's that story about the two sides that were fighting,
一方的男孩爱上了对方的妹子 and then a guy from one side got with a girl from the other side,
然后他们的爱情 就让两方握手言和 and their love sort of brought the groups together?
<狮子王2>? "Lion King 2"?
对 就是<狮子王2> Yes,"Lion King 2."
就是说我们找个人 来和他们某个人搞搞 也可以来一发 I mean,if we can get one of us to go out with one of them,probably have sex,
那样的话 我们就可以和睦共处了 then it could be a symbol of us all getting along.
对 有点像一个国家的公主 嫁给另一个国家的王子 Yeah,it's kind of like when a princess of one country marries the prince of another.
得了吧 这也太扯了 Oh,come on.This is stupid.
两群人互不理解的时候 You guys,when two groups of people don't understand each other,
要缓和矛盾 不能只通过… you can't just try and diffuse the tensions with...
他现在是来劲了 要演讲吗? Is he seriously...Is he seriously giving a speech right now?
他现在是来劲了 要演讲吗? Is he seriously giving a speech right now?
这件事必须马上行动 This is gonna have to happen pretty fast,
所以不管是谁去 都要赶紧钓个加拿大妞儿 so whoever's gonna do it needs to ask a Canadian girl out soon.
- 1 2 3 不是我 - 不是我 - 1,2,3,not it. - Not it.
- 不是我 - 不是我 - 不是我 - Not it. - Not it. - Not it.
不不 不是我 No,no!Not it!
我靠! Oh,shit!
CNN头条新闻
一位科罗拉多男子 正受到大众的追捧 Support is growing for a Colorado man
他主张对付非法移民的方法 就是干死他们 who claims the way to deal with illegal immigrants is to * them all to death.
请看来自明尼苏达的现场报道 We go live to Minnesota.
Tom 这位政治活动家 正在全国路演 寻求大众的支持 Tom,the political activist is going around the country to get support for his agenda.
Garrison先生 你相信移民问题很容易解决是吗 And,Mr.Garrison,you believe the immigration problem is easy to solve.
我的国家去哪儿了?
是的 干死他们 Yes.* them all to death.
让我们一起重振这个国度 Let's make this country great again.
你说要干死他们 那具体要怎么做呢? And when you say,"* them all to death," what are you actually suggesting be done?
就是我们围住他们 扒了他们的裤子 I'm suggesting we round them all up,pull down their pants,
干到他们灵肉分离 and * them until their spirits leave their bodies.
美利坚万岁 USA!
然后等我们把最后一个干死之后 我们就建个高墙 And then after we've * every last one of them to death,we build a big wall.
然后如果有谁还敢翻墙过来 我们再干死他! And if anyone comes over the wall,we * them to death,too!
我们把他们都干死 And then we * to death all...
嗯? Dan? Dan? Uh,Dan?Dan?
我们得到消息 高墙已建成 We are getting word that a wall has already been built.
是吗? 对不对? Is that right?Yes?
CNN了解到加拿大已筑起高墙 防止我们越境 CNN is confirming that Canada has built a wall to keep us out.
他们筑墙是什么意思?! What do you mean they built a wall?!
他们筑个鸡毛墙 They can't build a * wall!
干死他们! Oh * them to death!
大家好哇 Hey,there!
欢迎来到加拿大
天气不错哈 Beautiful day,isn't it?
这是什么鬼?! What the hell is this?!
这个吗? 是城墙 Oh,this?This is a wall.
抱歉 伙伴 你们不能过来 Sorry,buddy.Nobody allowed in.
他们怎么能这样? Can they do that?
听着 我们要来跟你们政府谈谈... Look,we came to speak with your government about the...
抱歉! 过了这里就是我们的领地 Yeah,no,sorry!Everything past here is ours.
你们...你们不能 不能过来 You can't...You can't go past...past here.
我们是美国人! 我们才不想过去呢! We're Americans!We don't even want to be over there!
你以为我们会干吗? What do you think we're gonna do?
好吧 我们只是不想 让你们过来奸杀掳掠 Well,you know,we just don't want you raping our women and stuff.
真是可笑! That is ridiculous!
二逼 你快够了... All right,smart-ass,that's just about enough...
我们这边好东西可多了 不想跟你们分享 Look,there's just some really cool shit back here,and we don't feel like sharing it.
什么好东西? Cool shit like what?
和你们无关 Don't worry about it.
不 后面是什么? 让我看看! No.What's back there?Let me see!
- 算了 Garrison - 不 该死的! 让我看看! - It's all right,Garrison. - No,Goddamn it!Let me see!
那个戴眼镜的怎么样? 有点小性感 What about that one in the glasses?She's kind of hot.
哪里性感了 She's not hot.
就像个长着鸡鸡的烂黄瓜 She looks like a messed-up cucumber with wieners on it!
好吧 那个瘦的怎么样? All right.How about the lanky one there?
那个戴帽子的呢? What about the one in the hat?
她长得像Alanis Morissette 对吧? (加拿大摇滚女星) She kind of looks like Alanis Morissette,huh?
Alanis Morissette得有80岁了吧 Alanis Morissette is like 80 years old or something!
- 天呐! - 好吧 Butters 淡定 - Geez! - Okay,B-Butters,relax.
我不要加拿大女朋友 Eric! Well,I don't want a Canadian girlfriend,Eric!
好吧 那你希望有种族战争? Okay,you just want a race war?
不想! No!
穿白鞋的还算能看 The one in the white shoes isn't that ugly.
好 去上那个白鞋妹 Okay,go * the one in the white shoes.
好吧 Okay.
你好 我叫Butters 你叫什么? Hi.My name is Butters.What's yours?
我叫Charlotte I'm Charlotte.
Charlotte 我从来没这么做过 Oh,Charlotte,I've never done this before.
你觉得刀疤在天上看着吗? You think Scar's up there?
(仿<狮子王2>台词)
他不是我爸 但他是我的一部分 He wasn't my father,but he's still part of me.
不 辛巴 我们还没开始 Oh,no,Simba.We have barely begun.
我们一起远走高飞 然后... We'll run away together and...and...
建立属于自己的荣耀 And start a pride all of our own.
Tom 加拿大边境形势紧张 Tom,the scene at the Canadian border is electric
数位政治领袖正在商讨应对 加拿大封锁边境的策略 as several political leaders try and strategize how to deal with being shut out of Canada.
加拿大政府有自主筑墙的权利 If the Canadian government wants to put up a wall,they have every right.
然而我们要问 他们为何会出此下策? And yet,we must ask why they thought this to be necessary.
不 干他们 干你 No,* them,and * you.
我就想看看他们那边有啥好东西 I want to see if they have really cool * back there.
- 我们需要的是... - 不 你的逼宽如沟壑 - What we need is a... - No,you've got a gaping gash,
你的蛋酸气熏天 and you've got vinegary balls.
加拿大人不能这么做! The Canadians can't do this!
他们不知道有成千上万加拿大人 非法越境到我们这儿吗? Don't they realize that hundreds of thousands of their people are over here illegally?
你们就没修个墙拦拦? Oh,you guys didn't put up a wall?
闭上你的臭嘴 你个二逼 And you keep your Goddamn mouth shut,smart ass!
等我好好收拾你 I'll deal with you.
我要把事情解决! 我要过去那边! I get things done,and I'm getting back there!
- 给你 - 谢谢 Butters - Here you go. - Thanks,Butters.
包歉 我不知道什么是冰激凌 I'm sore-y I didn't know what ice cream was.
包歉是啥? What's sore-y?
这是加拿大人表达歉意的方式 Well,that's what Canadians say to express remorse.
嘿 没事儿 H-Hey,that's neato.
稍等 Charlotte Hang on,Charlotte,one sec.
怎么了? What do you want?
你迷奸她了吗? Have you given her the old Hot Cosby yet?
还没 我们刚看完电影 现在要去公园 No.We saw a movie,and now we're going to the park.
Butters 没时间磨蹭了 Butters,we don't have time for that.
赶紧把她奸了得了 I told you,you have to cut to the chase with a Hot Cosby.
如果我想跟这个女孩在一起 If I'm gonna be with this girl,
我不想让她回忆的时候 感觉一切都那么赶 I don't want her someday thinking it was all super rushed.
Butters 40年后 她变心就变了 无所谓 Nobody cares about 40 years from now when she suddenly changes her mind,Butters.
时间才是关键! 我们都会死的! Time is of the essence!We're all gonna die!
没事吧 Everything all right?
没事 就是工作上的事 Yeah,just some work-related stuff.
那你愿意明晚来我家吃饭吗 So,hey,I wanted to see if you wanted come over to my house for dinner tomorrow.
当然了 我当然想去了! Oh,boy.Yes,I'd love to.Here we go.Oh,God.
尼亚加拉大瀑布国家公园
好的 可以 小心蛋蛋 Okay,that's...that's good.Watch the balls.
好 头盔给我 Okay,all right,give me the helmet.
我倒要看看该死的墙后面 到底有什么 We'll see what they've got behind that Goddamn wall.
你们知道我是谁吗朋友们? You know what I am,friends?
我是实干家 I'm a doer.
带我们重振雄风
美利坚需要Garrison
重振伟大的美利坚
Garrison 我们需要你!
对 加油 Yeah!Yeah!That's right!
加拿大人说我们进不去他们的国家 我偏要进去! Canada says we can't go into their country,I'm going into their country!
而且等我进去了 我要把他们干个遍! And when I do,I am * every last Canadian so hard!
好 开始吧 All right,let's do this.
美国万岁! USA,USA,USA!
美国万岁! USA,USA!
美国万岁! USA,USA,USA!
- 美国万岁 美... - 哦 他死了 - USA,US... - Aw,he's dead.
年轻人 我知道你和我女儿 已经恋爱了 So,young man,I understand that you and my daughter have started a romance.
嗯...是的 先生 Well,uh...Well,yes,sir.
你应该喜欢加拿大女孩吧? And I suppose you have a thing for Canadian girls,huh?
对吧? 喜欢枫叶国妹子? Is that it?You've got maple fever?
喂 爸爸! Eh,Daddy!
对不起 Charlotte 但我很怀疑他 I'm sorry,Charlotte,but I get suspicious.
我们被迫住在美国已经够惨了 It's bad enough we have to live in America.
这些偏爱枫叶国妹子的男孩 又想来搞我女儿 Now all the boys with maple fever are gonna want to have at our daughter.
别说了 Thomas That's enough,Donald.
等下 你们不想来这儿吗? Wait.You don't want to be here?
怎么会想来这儿? Why would we want to be here?
因为美国的一切都很棒啊 而且一应俱全 Well,you know,'cause everything is great here,and we have cool stuff.
加拿大也什么都有 Canada has everything.
是世界上最伟大的国家 It's the greatest country on Earth.
但是...那你们为啥离开加拿大? But...so,then why did you leave?
前阵子的加拿大大选 有几个候选人 There were several candidates during the Canadian elections.
有一个人特傲慢特二 啥话都脱口而出 One of them was this brash asshole who just spoke his mind.
他没有任何的提议 He didn't really offer any solutions.
只会说一些出格的话 He just said outrageous things.
我们觉得还挺有意思的 We thought it was funny.
没有人觉得他会成为总统 就是一个玩笑 Nobody really thought he'd ever be president.It was a joke.
但是我们却让这个玩笑 开得太久了 But we just let the joke go on for too long.
他迅速发展壮大 等我们准备说 He kept gaining momentum,and by the time we were all ready to say,
"好了 都严肃一点 到底谁来当总统呢?" "Okay,let's get serious now.Who should really be president?"
他已经宣誓入驻总统府了 He was already being sworn into office.
我们都没注意到 We weren't paying attention.
我们根本没注意啊! We weren't paying attention!
天 这个总统是有多烂啊? Geez.How bad can a president be?
如果有人想离开这个国家 让他们滚! If certain people want to leave this country,then let them!
让那些龌龊的基佬来舔我的蛋蛋! You tell those pussy homos they can suck my balls!
但是 总统先生... But,Mr.President...
让中(和谐)理也来舔我蛋蛋! And tell the prime minister of China that he can suck my balls!
- 还有鸡鸡 - 总统先生? - Oh,and Johnson... - Mr.President?
舔我蛋蛋 Suck my balls.
我替爸爸向你包歉 I'm sore-y about my papa.
他有时候太情绪化了 He can be really emotional sometimes.
你不用包歉 You don't got to be sore-y.
我才应该包歉 It's me who should be sore-y.
Charlotte 我觉得 大家都对加拿大人有误会 I think everyone has the wrong idea about your people,Charlotte.
没关系 我们愿意给他们时间 It's okay.We just have to give them time.
我不值得你这么做 I wasn't supposed to have time.
我本应该迷奸你的 这样我们两国人就能和平共处了 I was supposed to give you a Hot Cosby so our species could coexist.
但现在我明白了 你们本就不想来这儿 But now I realize you guys don't even want to be here.
难道你想待在这里吗? So do you want to be here?Now?
没有什么地方是我愿意待的 There's really nowhere I'd rather be.
如果你不介意的话 If it's okay with you...
我想试试慢慢奸 I'd like to try a nice Slow Cosby instead.
在加拿大 我们称之为"爱" In Canada,we call a Slow Cosby "love."
噢 快看! Oh,look!
流星 A shooting star.
在加拿大 我们觉得它能带来好运 In Canada,we say that's good luck.
我们也是 So do we.
有人吗? Hello?
啊 天啊! 啊 天啊! Oh,God!Oh,God!
嘿! 人呢? Hey!Where is everyone,guy?
见鬼 Geez.
* A-N-Q-U-A-N * S-A-F-E-T-Y
* 安全之舞 * Safety dance
* 想跳就跳 * We can dance if we want to
什么鬼?! What?!
美国市民怎么翻墙过来的? Hey!How did a U.S.citizen get past my wall?
我来是想搞明白 我的国家去哪儿了 I came here to find out where my country gone.
你的国家去哪儿了? Where your country gone?
我还想问我的国家去哪儿了! Where my country gone!
才不是 我的国家到底去哪儿了 臭婊子! No,where my country gone,bitch!
从来没人敢跟我这样说话 伙计! Nobody talks to me like that,buddy!
也从来没人跟我这样说话 朋友! Nobody talks to me like that,fwiend!
- 呃! 真的吗? - 你个傻逼 - Ergh!Yeah? - Stupid...unh!
- 小混蛋! 你以为你能... - 所以我才会修那个墙 - Little asshole!You think you can... - This is why I built that wall!
来 来 There you go!There you go!
我来这里就是要做一件事! I came here to do one thing!
嘿 搞什么 啊! 戳疼我了 Hey,what the...Hey,that pokes,buddy!
我的天 Oh,my God,guy.
求你了 求你了 我不能 Please!Please,I can't...
求你了! 不 不 No,please!No!
不要啊! 不要啊! No!No!
看看他们 Thomas Oh,look at them,Thomas.
我觉得他们是真心相爱的 I think they really like each other.
是的 我很赞成 他们看起来像是陷入爱河了 Yes,I have to admit,it seems they're actually falling in Slow Cosby.
我来吧 I'll get it.
兄弟 你听说新闻了吗? Hey did you hear the news,buddy?
加拿大总统被干死啦! The Canadian president has been * to death.
太赞了! Yes!Yes!
啥? 你说真的吗? What?Are you sure?
什么事啊 Donald? What is it,Donald?
亲爱的 加拿大总统被干死了 The Canadian president got * to death,darling.
天啊! 那我们就能回加拿大了? Oh,my goodness!Should we go back to Canada,then?
对啊 我们走吧 Yes,I guess,let's go back.
- 再见! - 拜! - See ya! - Bye!
- 美梦成真了 伙计们! - 再见 伙计们! - It's been real,guy! - See ya,guy!
Charlotte! Charlotte!
等我到家了会联系你的 我的爱人! I'll Skype you when I'm home,my love!
啊 我就应该迷奸她的 Ah,I should've done the Hot Cosby.
- 你做到了 Garrison! - 谢谢你 Garrison! - You did it,Garrison! - Thank you,Garrison!
朋友们 我想我证明了 我的策略完全正确 Friends,I think I've proven that my policies work to get things done.
我知道我的真正目标是什么 我要带着我的目标一直走到华盛顿 I know what my true calling is,and I am going to keep this going all the way to Washington.
请等一下! 不是我! Hold on! Wait!It wasn't me!
不是我把加拿大人引到这儿来的 I wasn't the one who brought the Canadians here.
就和现在的情况一样 It was something just like this.
你们还不明白吗? Don't you see?
如果说我们学到了什么 If there's anything we've learned,
那就是我们必须在重蹈覆辙之前 停止这些耸人听闻的政治宣讲 it's that we have to stop this kind of sensationalistic politics before the same thing happens to us,
因为如果任由这种事... because if we let this kind of...
这种... this...kind of...
- 靠 - 难以置信 - Dude. - Unbelievable.
好吧 我的朋友们 我得告别了 All right,my friends,I have to say goodbye now
因为我要带着我的竞选搭档 前往华盛顿了 because I'm off to Washington with my running mate.
系好安全带 小伙砸! Buckle up,buckaroo!
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-=YTET-伊甸园字幕组=- 翻译: 鬼糖 赵小兵 二木三白 羊咩咩 尤小游 lintianshine 校对: 阿公 时间轴: YTET- 林莳工
南方公园 第十九季 第二集 完 BD：Tearemix