-=伊甸园美剧 http://bbs.sfile2012.com=- -=伊甸园字幕站 http://ytet.org/=- 荣誉出品 本字幕仅供学习交流，严禁用于商业途径
-=YTET-伊甸园字幕组=- 翻译: 鬼糖 二木三白 羊咩咩 长青柚 校对: 阿公 时间轴: YTET- 林莳工
* 欢迎来到南方公园 享受好时光 * I'm goin' down to South Park,gonna have myself a time
* 到处都是友好的脸 * Friendly faces everywhere
* 淳朴的居民乐天知命 * Humble folks without temptation
* 来到南方公园 可不要大惊小怪 * Goin' down to South Park,gonna leave my woes behind
* 大车小车随便停 * Ample parking day or night
* 人人喊着邻居你好! * People spouting,"howdy,neighbor!"
* 到了南方公园 看你感觉多自然 * Heading on up to South Park,gonna see if I can't unwind
* (你要听得清我说话 算你最厉害!) * Mrph rmhmhm rm!Mrph rmhmhm rm!
* 快来南方公园 让你笑口常开 * Come on down to South Park and meet some friends of mine
南方公园 第十九季 第四集 BD：Tearemix
跨时代城屎小镇
- 早上好 Randy - 早上好 Ger - Morning,Randy. - Morning,Ger.
又是美好的一天 Just another day in paradise,huh?
是啊 随着全食超市的入驻 开了不少新餐馆呢 Yeah,look at all these new restaurants the Whole Foods has brought in.
我们去吃吃看那家吧 Let's try out that one there.
嗨 两人桌 谢谢 Hi.Two of us,please.
抱歉 我们这儿还得等30分钟才有位置 Yeah,sorry,guys.We got about a 30-minute wait.
喔 借一步说话 Oh,uh,excuse me.
好的 先生 请稍等 我马上给您找个位置 Yes,sir.Give me a second.I'll have a table right away.
你跟他说什么了 What'd you say to him?
我只是告诉他我的身份 I just told him who I am.
- 你的身份? - 我是Yelp的评论员 - Who are you? - I'm a Yelp reviewer.
(美国的大众点评)
我平时不太会提这茬 以免他们太巴结我 I usually keep it on the down-low so they don't kiss my ass too much.
请跟我来 先生 Right over here,sir.
你们好 欢迎来到地方特色餐厅 All right,guys,welcome to Vernacular.
谢谢 他们有告诉你我是Yelp会员吗 Thanks.Uh,did they mention to you that I am a Yelper?
是的 先生 通知我们了 Yes,we've been alerted,sir.
很好 Great.
你能让人把灯光调亮一些吗 谢谢 Could you have them turn the lights up a little,please?
看呐 Gerald Oh,look at it,Gerald...
这么多新住户搬进城里 All the new families moving in.
我们的小镇已今非昔比了 Our little town is all grown up.
那份煎玉米卷还没做好吗 客人催了 Where's that other taco plate?We need it now!
我有点忙昏头了 I'm a little overwhelmed.
我知道 但是我们倾家荡产 搬到这里开店 I know,but we put everything into moving here and starting this business,
我们必须要成功 and we have to be impressive.
David 你一定要尽全力帮助妈妈 David,you must help your mama however you can.
我们不能再回那鬼地方了 We're not going back to that miserable place.
我也不想回去 I don't want to go back,either.
- 做好了 - 好的 - Okay,done. - Great!
我们必须让这位客人满意 We really have to impress this customer.
他是个本地美食评论家 He's a local food critic.
又来一个? Another one?
好的 来了 朋友 Okay,here you go,amigo...
第二份煎玉米卷和牛肉卷 Another taco plate and the taquitos.
谢了 Oh,thank you.
我说过我是Yelp的评论员了吗 And did I mention I am a food critic for Yelp?
是的 您提到过几次了 Yes,you mentioned that several times.
我只是不希望你放松警惕 Okay,I just didn't want you caught off guard.
我本想给这家店五星好评 I was thinking of giving this place five stars.
真的吗 Really?
是的 但是我在五星和 一星之间 犹豫不决 Yeah,but I'm kind of teetering on five stars or one star.
不不不不 请别打一星 有什么我能效劳的吗 Oh,no,no.No one star,please.What can we do to...
来点免费甜点 或许我能动心 I mean,I could probably be persuaded with some free desserts.
我马上给您拿一份 Let me get that for you.
很好 话说能调小一点音乐吗 Great.And could you turn down the music a bit?
这异教玩意儿伤到我耳膜了 This pagan shit hurts my ears.
当然 Of course.
嘿 嘿 那个杂工 Oh,hey.Hey,busboy.
小杂工 小杂工 叫你的 Busboy!Busboy!Por favor!
- 小杂工! - 我叫David - Busboy! - My name is David.
- 你说什么? - 我说 我叫David - Excuse me? - I said my name is David.
应该读"Day-vid" 好吗 Uh,it's actually pronounced "Day-vid," okay?
不 我叫"Da-veed" Well,I'm "Da-veed."
是读David 伙计 查查字典 It's David,dude.Look it up.
发生什么事了 What's going on?
别还嘴 儿子 我们需要他 Do not argue,son.We need him.
来 一份免费甜点 There you are...A few free desserts.
噢 抱歉 又来客人了 Oh,excuse me.More customers.
你好 两位 谢谢 Hi.Two of us for lunch,please.
好的 这边情 Yes. Right away.
哦对了 我只是想说一下 我和我老婆都是Yelp评论员 Oh,and,uh,I just wanted to mention that my wife and I are Yelp reviewers,
所以 请安排你们最好的位置 谢谢 so,uh,your best table,please.
天呐 你们俩也是? Oh,geez.You guys,too,huh?
好的 恩 我带你们去这边吧 Okay,um,I'll get you set up right over here,okay?
这家店看起来不错 This place seems nice.
还不好说呢 I guess we'll see.
还不好说呢 是的 I guess we'll see,won't we?
我老天 现在什么人 都能把自己当美食评论家了 Oh,God.Now everyone thinks they're a food critic.
南方公园小学
警告:YELP评论员
拿到了吗? 拿到了吗? 拿到了吗? Did you get them?Did you get them?Did you get them?Huh?
拿去 Here you go.
Olive Garden的脆皮意式烩饭小球 (全美连锁意大利风味餐厅) Crispy risotto bites from Olive Garden.
Eric 你是怎么做到的? How do you do it,Eric?
我是个美食评论家 Butters 想要什么都会有 I'm a restaurant critic,Butters.I get whatever I want.
天呐 Geez.
那边往前走就是餐厅 然后大部分教室都在这边 So,the cafeteria's back that way,and most of the classrooms are this way down the...
小杂工在这儿干吗 What's the busboy doing here?
David是转校新生 David is new to our school.
挺好的 你也得擦这里的桌子吗? Oh,cool.Are you gonna clean the tables here,too?
你是怎么来上学的? How do you get to school?
你骑着你的小自行车来的吗? Do you ride your tiny bicicleta?Huh?
闭嘴 Shut up.
听着 朋友 抱歉 我只给了你家餐馆两颗星 Look,amigo,I'm sorry I only gave your parents' restaurant two stars,
- 但我已经手下留情了 - 你为什么只给两颗星 - but it could've been worse. - Why'd you only give them two stars?
抱歉 那儿的食物完全扰乱了 我的消化系统 I'm sorry,but the food totally messed my stomach up.
吃完的第二天早上 我上厕所 发现我的粑粑太硬了 The morning after I ate it,I went to the bathroom,and my poop was all solid...
就 根本没有稀的 Like,no water at all.
- 本来就不该有稀的 你知... - 当时就是.. - It's not supposed to have water,you... - It was like this one,
我必须从菊花里挤出一整条硬的 solid piece that I had to push out my asshole.
就像我从里面被强暴了一样 It was like being raped from the inside.
你家的餐馆达不到我的标准 "Day-vid" Your parents' restaurant just wasn't up to my standards,"Day-vid."
- 是"Da-veed" - "Day-vid" - "Da-veed." - "Day-vid."
- "Da-veed" - "Day-vid" - "Da-veed." - "Day-vid."
"Da-veed" "Da-veed."
"Day-vid" "Day-vid" "Day-vid" "Day-vid" "Day-vid." "Day-vid.""Day-vid.""Day-vid."
我可以马上把这条评论 改成一星差评 I can update this to a one-star review in two seconds,dude.
老天 当美食评论家真好 Oh,God,I love being a restaurant critic.
然而 这并不是全部 And yet,there was more.
因为在这段秋意凋零的酥脆时光里 For in this crisp time when autumn begins to fade,
主厨辣椒卤鸡竟然在酥皮上 也撒了一层薄薄的辣椒粉 the chef brines chicken in haba帽ero and even adds haba帽ero powder to the crust.
但是辣味却被压制住了 But the heat is restrained.
你可以品尝着充满果香的珍馐 而不用担心辛辣之刺痛 You experience the fruity,delicious flavor of this without any spicy pain.
我不需要感到痛苦 I don't need anymore pain.
废话 谁会想 Hell,does anyone?
Gerald 我们要去公园 你要一起去吗 Gerald,we're going to the park.You want to come along?
抱歉 亲爱的 Sorry,honey.
这条苹果蜂餐厅的评价 已经上了热评了 This review for Applebee's has turned into a 50-pager.
然后我还需要润色一下 Ruby星期二餐厅的评价 Then I have a polish on Ruby Tuesday's.
Gerald 你能歇会儿吗 Why don't you take a break from Yelping,Gerald?
你太把Yelp当回事儿了 You seem a little overwhelmed.
我确实是太把这个当回事儿了 I am overwhelmed.
我都不知道自己在做什么 Sometimes,I don't know what I've gotten myself into.
但现在大家都在看我的评价 我不想让大家失望 But now everyone relies on my Yelp reviews,and I-I don't want to let anyone down.
好吧 如果你饿了的话 冰箱里有只鸡 Well,there's chicken in the fridge if you get hungry.
谢了 但我还需要给 城里新开的饭店写评论 Thanks,but I-I got Yelp a new place in Shi Tpa Town tonight.
我滴妈 累屎我了 God,I'm so damn tired.
好吧 你开心就好 Okay,have fun.
呵呵 开心 她说 "Fun," she says.
总之 造访苹果蜂餐厅 让我有一种升仙的感觉 In finality,I would say my experience at Applebee's was sublime
尤其是在超精美的角斗士旁边吃饭 and my treatment near that of a gladiator most decorated.
但街边停车不是很方便 But the street parking wasn't that great.
两星半 Two-and-a-half stars.
好了 Yes.
过来 Liza 跟你介绍一下女生们 Come on,Liza.I'll introduce you to the girls.
你怎么不吃饭呢 Eric? Well,aren't you eating lunch,Eric?
我是美食评论家 好么 Butters I am a food critic,Butters,okay?
我不可能吃餐厅的东西 I can't just eat cafeteria food.
先僧您的快递到了嘿! Okay,here you are,sir!
陈皮鸡 城屎牛肉和城屎蛋卷儿! There's orange peel chicken,some city beef,and a city egg roll!
你在逗我吗 Are you joking?
你迟到了 Well,you are a little late.
大概迟了一颗星吧 Like,I don't know,maybe only-one-star late.
不要 不要 不要减一颗星 Oh,no.No one star,please.
你们这帮评论员太坑爹了 You Yelpers are killing me.
好吧 免费 免费 还不行吗 Okay,you no pay.You no pay. Please.
这还差不多 你可以滚了 Sounds good.Now get the * out of here.
好好好 我这就滚 谢谢谢谢! Yes,yes!I'll get the * out!Thank you!
你好厉害哦 Eric Well,you're pretty important,Eric.
他一点都不厉害 He's not important at all.
对对对 你说得对 Kyle 我不厉害 Yeah,no.No,no,you're right,Kyle.I'm not important.
David 就随便说说 Oh,hey,David,I was just wondering.
你怎么来上学的? Um,how do you get to school?
骑着你那个小小墨西哥自行车吗? Do you ride your tiny bicicleta?
- 有完没完 - 怎么了 - Stop it. - What?
我就想听他说 四滴 就骑我的小小墨西哥自行车来滴 I just want to hear him say,"Si,me ride me tiny bicicleta to school."
四滴 就骑我的小小墨西哥自行车来滴 Si,me ride me tiny bicicleta to school.
哈哈 我说的对吧 我去歇会儿 That's awesome.I'm gonna go out to recess.
帮我收一下好吗 David? 谢啦 Will you bus this for me,David?Thanks.
哥们儿 别去啊 Ah,don't.Dude... Dude,don't.
老大 都半夜了 回家睡觉吧 Sir,it's midnight. Go home.Get some sleep.
全市人民都指望我呢 我不能睡觉 There's no time to sleep when the city's counting on me.
还要写Yelp的评价? More Yelp reviews,sir?
今天在红龙虾吃得很不爽 I had a bad experience at Red Lobster,
如果别人不知道 他们也会遭殃 and if the people don't know about it,they could,too.
大家应该知道去哪里吃饭最好 Mitch Folks deserve to know where to eat,Mitch.
但他们有感谢你吗 But does anyone even thank you for it?
我不需要他们感谢我 I don't need them to.
我知道他们需要我就够了 I know they need me,and that's enough.
- 上帝保佑你 - 我知道 - God bless you,sir. - I know.
欢迎光临口哨威利餐厅 匹萨怎么样 Welcome to Whistlin' Willy's.Y'all enjoying your pizza?
来 你过来 Look here,my good man.
我们已经等了15分钟了 你还不给我儿子唱生日快乐歌 We've been waiting over 15 minutes for you to sing "Happy Birthday" to our son.
实在不好意思了 我们一家三口都是美食评论员 Unfortunately for you,we are both restaurant critics,and so is our son.
一星差评 One star.
有人吗! 紧急情况! Excuse me!Emergency!
在这里! 紧急情况! Over here!Emergency!
给我在塑料球池子里弄张桌子 I would like a table inside the area with all the little plastic balls,please.
动作迅速点 我是Yelp评论员 And make it snappy.I am a food critic for Yelp.
够了!我受够了! That does it!I've had enough!
所有Yelp评论员 都从这给我滚出去! All you Yelp reviewers get the hell out of here!
我不管我的饭店会怎样! I don't care what happens to my business!
我特么受够了跪舔你们了! I ain't kissing your asses no more!
起来 所有Yelp评论员都给我滚出去 Go on.Every Yelper,get the * out of here!
小心点 Bill 一星差评可不是好事哦 Careful now,Bill.You don't want a one-star review.
你不是美食评论家 Dennis! You're not a food critic,Dennis!
你特么就是个修车的! 给我滚! You're a * mechanic!Now get the * out!
所有Yelp评论员 都给我滚出去 Go on!All you Yelping sons of bitches get the * out of here!
你会后悔的 口哨威利 You're gonna regret this,Whistlin' Willy.
你怎么这么对待Yelp评论员呢 You can't treat Yelpers this way.
你特么给我滚 You get the...Get the * out!
干得漂亮 Well,good for you.
你也是 给我滚 You,too,you son of a bitch.
跨时代城屎小镇
结束了! 全都结束了! It's over!It's over!??
你看报纸了吗? 结束了! You see paper?!It's over!
口哨威利和Yelp评论员干起来了 Whistlin' Willy!He stand up to the Yelpers!
我们再也不用跪舔他们了! We don't have to kiss their asses anymore!
赶走Yelp评论员后 生意火爆
看! 大家都开始这么做了! Look!Everybody doing the same!
Yelp评论员禁止入内
结束啦 结束啦 It's over!It's over!
Skeeter 你听说了吗 Hey,Skeeter,you hear the news?
是个奇迹 It's a miracle.
真是个奇迹 It's a miracle!
卧槽 谁把屎拉地上了? What the * Uh,dude,somebody spilled shit on the floor.
David 地上有脏东西 Hey,David,somebody spilled something here.
你过来擦一下 谢啦 Could you clean this up,por favor?
David 地上脏了快来擦 David?Over here.There's some shit on the floor.
说你呢嘿 怎么不理我 Hey,hey,hey,hey.What's going on,man?
你没听说吗 You haven't heard?
没人在乎你们评论员怎么想了 Nobody gives a * what Yelp reviewers think anymore.
说什么呢 What are you talking about?
我是这里最有影响力的评论员 I'm the most influential critic in this town.
好吧 David 别管地上的脏东西 Okay,David,forget the spill.
你就说 我叫David Just give me one little,"My name is David.
我骑着小小墨西哥自行车上学 Me ride me bicicleta to school."
我叫Da-veed My name is "Da-veed."
我这就改我的评论 Okay,I'm...I'm updating my review.
这就改哦 I'm about to do it.
你最好马上说 我骑小小墨西哥自行车上学! You better say,"I ride me bicicleta to school!"
一颗星 One star.
没... 没星星 No...no stars?
没星星都不行? No stars?
你不能这么对我 You can't just treat me like I'm nothing.
我说话多少还有点用 I still know I'm worth something.
别这样啊 各位 Come on,guys.
好吧 你们都留在学校吧 没事儿 Oh,yeah.Y-you guys stay at school.That's cool.
都留在这吧 Y-you guys stay here.
跨时代城屎小镇
Yelp评论员禁止入内
我们不在乎你是不是美食博主
嘿 Eric Oh,hey,Eric.
都结束了 Butters It's all over,Butters.
我好不容易走到今天这步 Everything I've worked so hard to achieve.
一群屁都不懂就想当食评家的傻逼 让我的职业变成了笑话 All these hack wannabe food critics have made my profession a joke.
噢 真遗憾 兄弟 Aw,I'm sorry,bud.
这些人都想成为我这样的人 All these people trying to be like me,
但他们第二天 甚至连排便是否顺畅都懒得记 and they don't even write about poop consistency the next day.
好了 Eric 你该为 有人想成为你这样的人感到骄傲 Well,Eric,you should be proud that people want to be like you.
我是说 你的确开了个好头 I mean,you really started something.
也许吧 I guess.
如果这些人真的仰慕你 也许 Well if these people look up to you,maybe...
也许你应该定些规矩 告诉他们该怎么做 maybe you can sort of set the record straight and show them the way it's supposed to be done.
你说的对 Butters You're right,Butters.
也许我的确可以利用这些人 让真正的食评家重获尊重 Maybe I can actually use all these people somehow to make real food critics respected again.
Harrison Yates 你到底怎么了? Harrison Yates,what's gotten into you?
够了 Maggie 我不干了 That's it,Maggie.I'm hanging it up.
要是人们想吃镇上的新餐馆 就去吧 If people are gonna be trying all the new restaurants in town,
但他们没法参考我的评论了 they'll have to do it without my reviews.
你说什么呢? What are you talking about?
你不是说帮助大家远离恶劣就餐体验 是你奋斗的初心吗? You said that protecting people from bad dining experiences was what kept you going.
餐厅挂了禁止我入内的牌子 The restaurants put up signs saying I can't come in.
我不知道为什么他们偏偏不让我进 但似乎是大家不需要我了 I don't know why they singled me out,but it's like people don't need me.
- 我擦嘞 - 这是什么? - Well,I'll be damned. - What is it?
有人给我塞了张纸条 邀请我去聊聊 Somebody's put a note in the mailbox asking me to come and talk to them.
嘿 Yelp评论家 我们需要你
他们是真的需要我 They do need me.
我现在就去 I need to get going.
需要我陪你吗? You want me to come along?
不 他们只邀请了我 No.They're just asking for me.
我想是时候出马保护这个小镇了 I guess maybe I do have a town to protect.
噢 宝贝 你是要开派对吗? Oh,are you having a party,sweetheart?
不是派对 妈妈 Not a party,mom.
我邀请了所有装逼食评家来开会 I've invited all the poser food critics over for a meeting.
噢 好有趣 Oh,how fun.
一点也没趣 这很严肃 It's not fun.It's serious.
这些人以为 我能做的他们也能做 These people think they can do what I do,
必须有人告诉他们真相 but they need to be made to understand the reality.
等Yelp评论员到了 我需要你回避 听见了吗? When the Yelpers get here,I need you to get lost,okay?
好了 他们来了 是他们 走 妈你快走 Okay,that's them,that's them.Go!Get lost,mom!
你好啊! 嗨! 我叫... Hello!Hi!My name is ...
- 我是来开会的 - 是这里吗? - I'm here for the meeting. - Is this the right place?
擦
- 妈! - 我这就走宝贝 - Mom! - I'm going,honey.
妈 门外至少有十亿人! Mom,there's like a billion people here!
噢 是的 宝贝 Oh,yes,sweetie.
很多人都是Yelp评论员啊 I think quite a few people are Yelp reviewers.
这些人除了在Yelp写点评 就没别的事儿好干了吗? Oh,this many people have nothing better to do than write reviews on Yelp?
应该是这样的 宝贝 I guess so,honey.
你需要再来点柠檬水吗 ? Do you need more lemonade?
妈 可是特么有十亿人呢 Mom,there's a * billion people here.
感谢大家的到来 Uh,thank you all for coming.
我叫Eric 众所周知 我们这些Yelp评论家已经成了众矢之的 My name is Eric,and as you know,us Yelpers are being scrutinized.
你就不能大点声吗?! Can't you speak a little louder?!
好 我们Yelp评论家成了众矢之的! Yes,us Yelp critics are being scrutinized!
是的! 没错! That's right!Yeah!
现在 诚如你们所见 问题就在于评论的人太多 Now,you see the problem is that when there's too many reviewers,
人们已经分不清 谁才是真正的评论家了 people no longer know who is the real food critic.
你们都想做评论家 这很好 It's great that you all want to be critics,
但我们心里都清楚 谁才是这个镇上真正的食评家 but we all know who the real food analyst of the town is.
说得对! 对! That's right!Yeah!
噢 谢谢 Oh,thanks.
好了 既然已经明确了领导 你们其他人就只能服从 Okay,so,as long as there is one clear leader,then the rest of you can just follow.
只要这么多人可以追随一位领导者 And with this many people all following one captain,
我们就能夺回我们的权力! we can fight to get our power back!
夺回权力! Poweeeer back!
起义吧 为了你们的领导者 战斗吧! So now rise up,and fight for your leader!
同仇敌忾 让那些餐厅 看看我们这些食评家的能耐! Fight together,and show the restaurants that our food critic does matter!
好的 走起! Yeah,let's go!
- 好的 跟着我! - 所有人 这边走! - All right,follow me! - This way,everyone!
另一家本地餐馆在被Yelp评论家攻占后 关门大吉 Another local business is closing its doors tonight after being taken down by Yelp reviewers.
口哨威利 镇上孩子们最爱的餐厅 Whistlin' Willy's,a child favorite in town,
已成废墟 老板也已被脱衣斩首 was destroyed and its owner stripped and beheaded.
下面是现场视频 The following video is graphic.
不 求求你们 !不要! No,please!No,no,no,no,no!
南方公园小学
警告: Yelp评论家出没
我们都爱口哨威利餐厅 We all loved Whistlin' Willy's.
谁让他惹Yelpers评论家 It didn't do well with Yelpers.
你们这群混蛋 毁了镇上最好的地方 就因为人家不想拍你们马屁! You assholes destroyed the best place in town because they wouldn't kiss your asses!
拉倒吧 那儿太难吃了 Oh,come on,admit it.The food sucked.
谁他妈去那儿是想吃东西啊! Nobody went for the * food!
很抱歉各位 但口哨威利 Look,I'm sorry guys,but Whistlin' Willy failed to
没有意识到我们这类人 对他生意的重要性 recognize the influence someone like me has on their business.
现在我只有一个问题想问你 David Now I just have one question for you,David.
你是骑着你的小自行车来学校吗? Do you ride your teeny,tiny bicicleta to school?
四滴 就骑我的小小自行车来滴 S铆.Me ride mi teeny bicicleta to school.
- 你完了 - 是哈 我完了 - You're done. - Yeah,I'm done!
我现在可是千万人的领导者! I'm now the leader of thousands of people!
他们对我唯命是从 They all hang on my every word,
我要用这力量给小镇 带来它真正需要的东西 and I'm gonna use my power to finally get what this town really needs.
我发现红龙虾餐厅的服务员 态度很粗鲁 I found the waitstaff at Red Lobster to be rude and barely
甚至都没有意识到我是谁 以及我对这城市的意义 even acknowledging who I was or what I meant to this city.
Gerald 我要带Ike去小丑学校 Gerald,I'm taking Ike to clown school.
你要一起去吗? You care to join us?
我不能去 亲爱的 我现在是千万人的领导者 I can't,honey.I'm now the leader of thousands of people.
他们对我唯命是从 They all hang on my every word.
我要用这力量给小镇 带来它真正需要的东西 And I'm going to use my power to finally get what this town really needs.
跨时代城屎小镇
持续五天的时间里 著名的城屎小镇 已经被Yelp评论员攻占了 For the fifth day in a row,historic Shi Tpa Town is under siege by Yelp reviewers.
餐厅方面仍没有屈服之意 而Yelp评论员正在... The restaurants are still refusing to be intimidated,and the Yelp reviewers are...
而Yelp评论员正在准备全面开战 And the Yelp reviewers are preparing for all-out war.
愤怒的Yelp评论员 要求在镇上的所有餐厅享受特殊待遇 The angry Yelp reviewers are demanding special treatment at all city restaurants.
他们声称作为本地食评家 They claim that as local food critics,
他们理应受到尊重 而且所有的反对者都要受到惩罚 they deserve respect and that all who oppose them will suffer.
所有在线餐厅评论员都严阵以待 准备让餐厅臣服于他们 The online restaurant critics are getting ready to bring businesses to their knees,
一些已经关门大吉了 and some are already closing their doors.
停业
感谢不平凡的六天
一位当地餐厅的工作人员 居然向Yelp评论员的领导呛声 One local restaurant worker actually called out the Yelp critics' leader!
你以为你赢了吗 大人物? I guess you win,huh,big shot?
如果你真的是什么重要人物 If you really are any kind of important anybody,
带上你那食评家大屁股 滚到城南来见我 then get your bullshit food-critic ass to the south of town and face me,
因为你根本就不是美食评论家 你根本不重要! because you aren't a food critic,and you aren't important!
别当孬种 城南见 And unless you're chicken,I'll see you south of town.
- 警官 你去哪? - 你听见他说的了 - Where you going,sir? - You heard him.
墨西哥的小屁孩要见我 Little Mexican kid called me out.
他想跟我打架 好啊 He wants to fight me,that's fine.
警官 要后援吗? You need backup,sir?
不 他只让我自己去 No.He's just calling me out.
- 警官 上帝保佑你 - 行啦! - God bless you,sir... - I know!
David! 哥们 等下! David!Dude,wait!
哥们 别冲动啊 Dude,you don't wanna do this.
你不知道Cartman有多厉害 You don't know what Cartman's capable of.
在我家那儿 我们都用拳头解决问题 Where I come from,we settle things with our fists.
但这不是墨西哥 But this isn't Mexico.
哥们 我不是从墨西哥来的! 我来自爱达荷州 I'm not from Mexico,dude!I'm from Idaho!
(美国西北部州)
我要让这个混蛋知道 我们在博伊西是怎么做事的! I'm gonna show this prick how we do things in Boise.
(爱达荷首府)
你好啊 David! Oh,hello,David!
好 你有了军队 All right,you've got your army.
还有了追随者 You've got your followers.
如果你真的是伟大的领袖 告诉这城市你想要什么吧 死胖子! If you're such a great leader,then just tell the city what you want,fat ass!
小子 不许说我胖 我这么做是因为他们已经... Don't call me fat,son.I'm doing this because they've...
我想要的就是领导这些可爱的人 What I want is to be able to lead these fine people
- 给予他们尊重和尊严... - 不是我想做领袖的 - with the respect and the dignity... - I didn't ask to be the leader.
我是大家选定的 I was appointed!
我对这个小镇至关重要 You see,I'm extremely important to this town,
- 而且我并不打算... - 我作为镇上食评员的... - and I'm not going to be... - My journey as this town's food...
你让这些人受人鄙视 现在他们都来向我寻求答案 You've made these people feel unwanted,and now they look to me for answers.
我站在这里 尽管无助又害怕 但是我仍然愿意为这些人... Now here I stand,vulnerable,afraid,and yet willing to do what the people of this...
所以我们说 都见鬼去吧! And so we said to hell with it!
我们接受挑战 从小镇食评员 变成小镇精神领袖 And we took the challenge to go from the town's food critics to the town's spiritual leaders.
我们想要什么? What do we want?
人们可能会说"你只是一个美食博主" People would say,"Oh,you're just a food blogger.
"只是人群中的一小股声音" You're just a tiny voice in the crowd."
但现在我不再人微言轻 所以我会... Well,now my voice is heard,and I will...
...想要特殊优待 但是这些人认为这是我应得的 Wanted special privileges,but these people think I should have them.
对吧 伙计们? Right,guys?
也许我不配享受优待 Maybe I don't deserve special treatment,
但不然要怎么成为 他们心目中理想的美食评论家呢 but how else can I be the elite food critic they want?
人人都觉得自己是主角 Every person here thinks this is about them.
我想我知道应该怎么办了 I think I know what to do.
嗯 我也是 Yeah.Me,too.
鉴于你对社区的所有贡献 And for all your service to this community,
我们宣布你为终身精英美食评论家 we want to once and for all declare you our most elite food critic.
并授予金勋章 To distinguish you,we present to you the golden badge.
戴着这枚胸章意味着 你将会一直享受你应得的优待 Wearing this badge means you will always get the special treatment that you deserve.
市长 谢谢您 Thank you,Mayor.
这是一份重大的责任 但我必须接受 It's a big responsibility,but I suppose I have to accept.
我会尽全力为这个小镇服务 I will do my best to serve this town.
我们相信你会的 We know you will.
好的 带下一个进来 Okay,bring in the next one.
Davis先生 你已经证明你就是领袖 Mr.Davis,you have proven yourself a leader.
鉴于你对社区的所有贡献 And for all your service to this community,
我们宣布你为终身精英美食评论家 we want to once and for all declare you our most elite food critic.
并授予金胸章 To distinguish you,we present the golden badge.
戴着这枚胸章意味着 你将会一直享受应得的优待 Wearing this badge means you will always get the special treatment you deserve.
好的 所有饭店都已经同意 让Yelp评论员进店了 All right,we got all the restaurants to agree to let the Yelpers in
还要让他们感觉有优待 and to make them feel special.
儿子 你是怎么做到的? How did you do it,son?
嗯 请来份牛排 我是Yelp精英食评员 Ah,yes.The steak,please.I'm the,uh,Yelp elite.
来了个Yelp的人 要特殊关照哦 All right,we got a Yelper.Give it that special attention.
没问题! You got it!
你是Yelp享受特权的人啊 So you're one of Yelper's special blessed
你要吃的都是饭店最好的美食 You demand a restaurant's very best
他们一定会特殊对待你们的哦! Well,they're gonna treat you special
我告诉你 朋友 I'm telling you,chum
准备来点鼻屎和精液吧! Now get yourself ready for some boogers and cum!
- 鼻屎!精液! - 这就是对Yelp人的优待! - Boogers and cum! - That's called a Yelper special!
- 鼻屎!精液! - 说说你的脆饼干上是什么啊? - Boogers and cum! - Say,what's that on your pretzel?
你们的网上评论真的很有用 Your online critiques are real useful to some
享受你的鼻屎和精液吧! Now have a good time eating boogers and cum!
- 鼻屎!精液! - 有人往你的沙拉上放屁啦 - Boogers and cum! - Someone farted on your salad
- 鼻屎!精液! - 但是你的评论仍然有用 - Boogers and cum! - But your decor critiques are valid
你觉得你很特别 你就是大哥 You think you're special,like you're A number one
你吃的鼻屎和精液更特别! Well,there's a whole lot of special in boogers and cum!
鼻屎!精液! Boogers and cum!
比目鱼和大便的搭配怎么样? How about some feces with your flounder?
鼻屎!精液! Boogers and cum!
你喜欢独特味道的汉堡吗? You like that queefy quarter-pounder?
这有点辣辣的配料是什么? What's that spice that feels tangy on my tongue?
是柚子胡椒...还有鼻屎和精液 Oh,that's a yuzu pepper...along with some boogers and cum.
先生 给您 Here you are,sir.
谢谢David 服务态度不错哦 Thank you,David.That's good service.
我的朋友 我每天都给你带食物来 I will bring you food every day,my friend.
嗯 这是奶油酱吗 Hmm,is that a jalape帽o cream sauce?
是的 我爸爸为你特制的 Yes.My father made it just for you.
有点酸 但是还是很好吃 It's tart,but savory.
- 鼻屎!精液! - 做美食评论员很简单! - Boogers and cum! - Bein' a food critic's easy!
- 鼻屎!精液! - 你觉得有点反胃吗? - Boogers and cum! - Oh,you feel a little queasy?
你要去看医生吗? Do you need a diagnosis?
好的 医生来了 Well,the doctor's got one
你的胃里好像都是鼻屎和精液 Your stomach seems to be filled with boogers and cum.
- 鼻屎!精液! - 在你的土豆上撒尿! - Boogers and cum! - Piss in your potatoes!
- 鼻屎!精液! - 还有人在你的番茄上便便呢! - Boogers and cum! - Some guy shit on your tomatoes!
好吧 高大上的食评家 好像你们赢了 All right,fancy food critic,looks like you've won
请尽情享受鼻鼻鼻鼻...屎吧 Now please enjoy all the Bo-o-o-o-gers
鼻鼻鼻鼻...屎啊 Bo-o-o-o-gers
还有精...液啊! and cuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuum!
南方公园 第十九季 第四集 完 BD：Tearemix