翻译 Annie 海顿
字 幕 侠
关注新浪微博 @FIX字幕侠
翻译 豆和星星 舒九
THE SUB-MAN
校对 宇宙万宝路 后期 Jason肖
原 创 翻 译 中英双语字幕
特效 小布 压制 浅浅
♪ I'm goin' down to South Park, gonna have myself a time ♪
监制 宇宙万宝路 时间轴 阿布
THE SUB-MAN
原 创 翻 译 中英双语字幕
♪ Friendly faces everywhere
♪ Humble folks without temptation ♪
♪ Goin' down to South Park, gonna leave my woes behind ♪
♪ Ample parking day or night
♪ People spouting, "Howdy, neighbor!" ♪
♪ Heading on up to South Park, gonna see if I can't unwind ♪
南方公园 第二十一季 第２集 "放下手机"
♪ Mrph rmhmhm rm! Mrph rmhmhm rm! ♪
♪ Come on down to South Park and meet some friends of mine ♪
校会堂
好了 大家安静 All right, everyone. Listen up.
有位同学写了首歌 Today we're going to have a performance
今天要给我们表演 by one of our students who has written a song.
这首歌讲的是 The song is about his feelings
他对当前朝鲜政局的感想 towards the current political climate with North Korea.
请大家欢迎推克 Put your hands together for Tweek.
我们都要死了 We're all gonna die!
他们有核导弹了 They have nuclear missiles! Aah! Aah!
你们怎么都坐视不管 Why are you just sitting there doing nothing?!
我们得离开这里 We have to get out of here!
朝鲜想杀光所有人 North Korea wants to kill us all
我们的总统还一直添乱 and our president keeps making it worse!
为什么你们都无动于衷 Why are you all just sitting there?!
为什么你们假装啥事没都发生 Why are all acting like nothing's wrong?!
朝鲜要炸飞我们 我们都要死了 North Korea is going to bomb us! We are all dead!
我们必须干点什么 干点什么 We have to do something! Do something! Do something!
好 下面由汉娜·威廉姆斯 All right, next up we have Hannah Williams
带来表演"公车之轮" with her rendition of "Wheels on the Bus."
♪ 公车的轮子转啊转 ♪ ♪ The wheels on the bus go round and round ♪
克雷格 老兄 你得让推克冷静下来 Dude, Craig, you've got to get Tweek to get ahold of himself.
他把同学们都吓坏了 He's freaking everybody out at school.
- 我能怎么办 - 他是你男朋友兄弟 - What am I supposed to do? - He's your boyfriend, dude.
他不会听我的 He's not gonna listen to me.
他激动的时候从来都不听 He never does when he's emotional.
克雷格 我来教你谈恋爱 好吗 Craig, let me tell you about relationships, okay?
如果你没种搞事情 If you don't have some fucking balls,
是不会有未来的 you're not going to get anywhere.
不管是弯男还是直男 Doesn't matter if they're gay balls or straight balls,
如果你在感情中不强硬一点 if you don't take control of your side of a relationship,
- 你会被对方碾压．．． - 卡宝你怎么样 - you'll get walked all over... - Hey, babe. How you doing?
宝贝 你好吗 Oh, hey, baby. What's going on?
- 午休时还继续吗 - 当然回见 - We still on for recess? - Yup, I'll be there.
好的 宝贝 爱你哦 'Kay, babe. Love you.
你不是说你和海蒂分手了吗 I thought you said you broke up with Heidi.
我决定再给她一次机会 I decided to give her one more chance.
但你说她是虐待狂 But you said she was mentally abusive.
她的确是虐待狂 She is mentally abusive.
那你为什么要复合 So then why did you take her back?
因为她用自杀威胁我 Because she said she was gonna kill herself.
行了吗 大家 就这样 All right, guys? There.
我跟她分手后 她打给我 说什么 I broke up with her, and she called me, being all like,
"没有你我活不了 "I can't live without you.
我不知道我会怎么折磨自己 天呐" I'm scared what I'm gonna do to myself. Oh, God."
那婊子疯了 我能怎么办 The bitch is crazy. What am I supposed to do?
推克 Tweek.
伙计 拜托 你得冷静一下 Dude, come on. You got to settle down.
我没法冷静 我们都要死了 I can't settle down! We're all gonna die!
我们不会死的 你反应过度了 We're not all gonna die. You're overreacting.
一切都好 知道吗 Everything's fine, okay?
天呐 总统刚发推文 Oh, God! The president just tweeted
嘲笑朝鲜没胆量袭击我们 that North Korea doesn't have the guts to attack us!
他为什么要这么说 他这是在添乱 Why would he say that?! He's making everything worse!
- 推克．．． - 但朝鲜人会觉得 - Tweek... - But North Koreans are gonna think
我们都赞同总统的想法 we all agree with the president!
好 要不然你给议员写封信吧 Okay, so how about you write your congressman a letter.
那有什么鸟用 朝鲜想搞死我们 That won't help anything! North Korea wants us dead!
好 那就给朝鲜人写封信呗 Okay, so write a letter to the North Koreans.
我不会写韩文 I can't write in Korean
反正他们都就觉得我们好战 and they all think we're war-hungry anyway!
好吧 那不然你给朝鲜寄点什么 Okay, well, then why don't you just send something nice
表示友好 to the North Koreans.
这会让你放松点 宝贝 It'll make you feel better, babe.
- 送什么啊 - 不造 - Send something like what?! - I dunno, like,
烤点牛角面包啥的 make them some croissants or something.
我不会烤牛角面包 I don't know how to make croissants!
那你会做什么 Well, what do you know how to make?
纸杯蛋糕 Mm... cupcakes!
好 回家做点纸杯蛋糕吧 亲爱的 All right, go home and make some cupcakes, honey.
好吧 Okay!
- 斯坦 - 怎么 - Hey, Stan? - Yeah?
我能跟你聊聊艾瑞克吗 Can I talk to you about Eric?
卡特曼吗 好... Cartman? Okay...
我只想确保他没事 I just wanna make sure he's all right.
他怎么了 What do you mean?
我不知道该不该告诉你这些... I don't even know if I should be saying this but...
艾瑞克说他想自杀 Eric said he was thinking about killing himself.
什么 What?
我们分手了 他打电话说他要下手了 We broke up, and he called saying he was about to do it.
我还是很担心他 I'm still really scared for him.
等等 卡特曼说他要自杀 Wait, Cartman said he was gonna kill himself?
你答应我保密 我就把语音留言发给你 I'll send you the voice-mail if you promise to keep it private.
没问题 Totally.
你必须跟我复合 必须 You have to take me back! You have to!
我要自杀了 海蒂 I'm gonna kill myself, Heidi!
等我死了 你就知道后悔了 I'll kill myself, and then you'll be sorry!
就算你想跟我复合也没用 我已经死了 You'll wish you could have me back, but I'll be dead!
求你了 海蒂 求求你 Please, Heidi! Please!
笑够了吗 Okay, okay.
偷听别人的私密留言"真够义气" Really cool listening to people's private voicemails.
你听上去像快死的猪 You sound like a dying pig.
真好 看到你们觉得自杀好玩我真欣慰 That's great! I'm glad you guys think suicide is so funny!
平壤
校长办公室
进来 Entrée.
艾瑞克 有什么事吗 Yes, Eric. How can I help you?
我觉得我校学生对自杀 I don't think kids at this school
的重视程度不高 所以我们需要提高意识 take suicide seriously enough and we need to raise awareness.
很抱歉的是 Well, unfortunately this week
这周是抵制走神驾驶意识周 is Distracted Driving Awareness Week at school,
可能不太方便 so you might have a hard time.
走神驾驶 谁他妈关心这个 Distracted driving? Who gives a shit about that?
很多人 A lot of people.
由于人们开车玩手机 There's more deaths now because of
酿成了越来越多惨剧 people on their phones while driving than ever before.
P.C.校长 某人的生命危在旦夕 PC Principal, someone's life is at stake.
如果非让我跟走神驾驶抢 If I have to compete with distracted driving,
那我就不客气了 then that's what I'll do.
面 粉
朝鲜核武器准备就绪
朝鲜核武器会落在你家门口吗
朝鲜热爱纸杯蛋糕
一位叫做推克的小弯男 A young homosexual boy known only as Tweek
通过给朝鲜政府 has touched the hearts of many
送纸杯蛋糕的行为 感动了广大民众 by sending cupcakes to the North Korean government.
这个小混蛋成功引起了 The little rascal apparently made a dent
朝鲜独裁者的注意 with the North Korean dictator,
据说由于他太喜欢那些纸杯蛋糕 who is said to have loved the cupcakes so much
已着手做自己的... that he is started to make his own...
美国总统对纸杯蛋糕作出回应...
"美国总统对纸杯蛋糕做出回应..." "U.S. President responds to cupcakes..."
美国总统对纸杯蛋糕作出回应...
总统显然也听说了 The human interest cupcake story
有关纸杯蛋糕的温情故事 has apparently be heard by the president.
片刻前 总统发推写到 Just moments ago, the president tweeted,
总统阁下 @真·总统
关注
"我认识推克那小屁孩 "I know that kid Tweek.
朝鲜 他耍你呢 搞清楚点喽 He's fucking with you, North Korea. Get a clue.
我赌他在面糊里拉屎了" I'll bet he took a dump in the batter."
啥 他干嘛这么说 What?! Why would he say that?!
推克 冷静点 Tweek, calm down.
是总统 他推文里提到我了 The president! He tweeted about me!
他为啥这么干 你看见了吗 Why would he do that?! Did you see that?!
对 我看到了 Yes, I did see that.
所以我过来给你带了个好玩意儿 So I went and got you something to make things better.
- 啥玩意儿 - 这是指尖陀螺 - What?! - It's a fidget spinner.
它能缓解焦虑 看我的 It's supposed to help with anxiety. See?
指尖陀螺 你看到总统发的推文了吗 A fidget spinner?! Did you read what the president tweeted?!
美利坚总统又发送了 The president of the United States
新推文 他这次说... just tweeted again, this time saying...
"我希望全美所有儿童同推克一道 高喊 "I hope all children of America will stand with Tweek in saying,
'来炸我们呀 金正咚 你丫敢吗'" 'Go ahead and bomb us, Kim Jong Dong, we fucking dare you!'"
南方公园小学
抵制走神驾驶!!
朋友 能花一分钟了解走神驾驶吗 Hey, guys. Take a minute to read about distracted driving?
对你认识的大人们 Talk to all the grownups you
宣传当他们驾驶时 know about staying off their mobile devices
摆脱移动设备的理念 when they get behind the wheel.
同学们... 有空帮忙抵制走神驾驶吗 Hey, guys... Got a second to help stop distracted driving?
- 谢谢 - 同学们 - Thanks. - Hey, guys
同学们 花几分钟时间 Hey, guys, let's take a minute
来讨论自杀干预吧 and talk about suicide prevention.
此时此刻 学校里可能就有同学 There's probably someone right now at this school
正在考虑自杀 这事一点儿也不搞笑 thinking about killing himself, and it's not funny.
你最好严肃对待 否则他也许真的会下手 You better take it serious or he might actually do it.
♪ 我很难过 我很沮丧 ♪ ♪ I've been feelin' sad, I've been bein' sad ♪
♪ 不能和老妈诉苦 连老爸都没 ♪ ♪ Can't talk to my mom, don't even have a dad ♪
♪ 我撑不下去 活着有什么意义 ♪ ♪ I can't go on, what is living for? ♪
♪ 内心咆哮 "我真的不想活了" ♪ ♪ My heart screams "I don't wanna live no more" ♪
♪ 艾瑞克 我们不要你死 ♪ ♪ Eric, we don't want you to die ♪
♪ 艾瑞克 再给生命一次机会 ♪ ♪ Eric, give life a try ♪
♪ 艾瑞克 你要好好活着 ♪ ♪ Eric, we don't want you to die ♪
♪ 艾瑞克 天呐 别这么做 ♪ ♪ Eric, oh, God, no, Eric ♪
我真的不想活了 I don't wanna live no more!
♪ 可是艾瑞克 我们不要你死 ♪ ♪ But Eric, we don't want you die ♪
♪ 你那么酷 没了你在学校就没趣 ♪ ♪ You're so cool, we'd be sad at school ♪
♪ 没错 可朋友你不懂 ♪ ♪ Yeah, but you guys, you don't understand ♪
♪ 和我女票相处 就像陷入流沙 ♪ ♪ With my girlfriend, it's like I'm living in quicksand ♪
♪ 内心矛盾 我想进家暴妇女收容所 ♪ ♪ Conflicting thoughts, I need a battered wives' shelter ♪
♪ 我女票糟透了 我却一心想救她 ♪ ♪ My girlfriend is messed up, but all I wanna do is help her ♪
♪ 我快要窒息 快要被忧桑淹死 ♪ ♪ I'm suffocating, I'm drowning in sorrow ♪
♪ 大概明天两点半 就会自杀 ♪ ♪ Gonna kill myself prob'ly around 2:30 tomorrow ♪
♪ 可是艾瑞克 我们不要你死 ♪ ♪ But, Eric, we don't want you to die ♪
-♪ 艾瑞克 再给生命一次机会 ♪ -♪ 一起来 ♪ - ♪ Eric, give life a try ♪ - Everybody!
♪ 艾瑞克 我们不要你死 ♪ ♪ Eric, we don't want you to die ♪
-♪ 艾瑞克 天呐 别这么做 ♪ -但生活实在不易 - ♪ Eric, oh, God, no, Eric ♪ - But it's so hard!
♪ 艾瑞克 我们不要你死 ♪ ♪ Eric, we don't want you to die ♪
只有你们能改变这一切 Only you guys can make a difference.
无论你是黑人 白人 基佬 直男还是人妖 I don't care if you're black, white, gay, straight or trans,
除非你们从现在起 I am going to kill myself
把它当回事 不然我就自杀 unless you all start taking it seriously.
♪ 艾瑞克 求别自杀 ... ♪ ♪ Eric, please don't die... ♪
傻眼了吧 辣鸡 Distracted driving my asshole.
你好 推克 Hey, Tweek.
指尖陀螺玩得怎么样 How's it going with the fidget spinner?
- 棒呆了 - 你好像没那么焦虑了 - Great! - You seem a lot less anxious.
我的同性恋儿子终于好起来了 Things are finally turning around for my little homosexual son.
- 什么声音 - 不知道 - What is that?! - I'm not sure.
与会各方并未达成一致观念 Yet no agreement has been reached between the parties involved.
现在播报科罗拉多州突发新闻 Breaking news now out of Colorado,
朝鲜似乎向该州发射了一枚导弹 where the North Koreans appear to have fired a missile
经过推克的家 over Tweek's house.
推克就是上周吸引了 Tweek, of course, the young boy
金正恩注意的那个男孩 who got the attention of Kim Jong Un last week.
朝鲜新闻媒体 The news media in North Korea
声称此次导弹试射是全体朝鲜人民的胜利 is calling the missile test a victory for its people.
今天伟大的国家朝鲜... Today the great country of North Korea...
经成功向推克家上空发射导弹... has proven its determination and fortitude...
证明了自己的决心和坚定意志 by successfully firing a missile over Tweek's house.
- 推克现在．．． - 我滴妈呀我滴妈呀 - Perhaps now Tweek... - Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
为什么都发生在我身上 Why's this happening to me?!
他们必须知道这不是我的锅 They have to know this isn't my fault!
为了回应朝鲜试射导弹 In response to the North Korean test,
美利坚总统又在推特上 the president of the United States
发布了如下声明... has just tweeted this statement...
"你们真以为推克怕了吗 "You really think Tweek is scared?
推克会单枪匹马硬闯朝鲜 Tweek will single handedly go to North Korea
用后入式干死你们朝鲜小眼婊" and fuck all you slanty eyed bitches doggy style."
啥 他为啥要这么说 What?! Why would he say that?!
此外总统还发推说... The president also tweeted...
"要是你以为推克会怕 "If you even think Tweek is worried about
几个第三世界割水稻的傻屌 a bunch of dipshit poor ass third world rice pickers,
那就错了 think again."
亲娘嘞 他到底在干嘛 Oh, my God! What is he doing?!
- 推克推克冷静 - 他为毛不住手为毛 - Tweek, Tweek. Calm down! - Why won't he just stop?! Why?
推克 推克 拿着你的陀螺 Tweek! Tweek, h-here's your fidget spinner!
为啥他非要当一根搅屎棍 Why does he keep making it worse?!
拿好陀螺 推克 挺住 儿子 Your fidget spinner, Tweek! Come on, son!
注意力放在陀螺上 Focus on the fidget spinner.
我去 朝鲜好像又发射了一枚导弹 Oh, geez, looks like North Korea launched another missile.
真的 又是实验吗 你在看哪儿呢 Oh, really, like another test? Where are you looking?
我忙着呢 看到总统怎么发推回应了吗 I'm on Drudge. You see what the president tweeted about it?
- 还没他咋说 - 总统发推说 - No, what'd he say? - The president tweeted
"朝鲜就是亚洲的菊花... "North Korea is the butthole of Asia and...
无辜的娃 Innocent child!
南方公园小学
我明白 真是一场惨剧 I know. I know, it's so sad.
好极了 这才像话嘛 Well, how nice. That's a little more like it.
朋友们 怎么回事 改变主意了吗 Well, guys, what happened? Change of heart?
对 你没听说吗 Yeah, you didn't hear?
加里·波克维克被走神的司机撞死了 Gary Borkovec got ran over by a distracted driver.
啥 加里·波克维克 他死了 What?! Gary Borkovec? Is he dead?
是啊 兄弟 他死了 Yeah, dude, he's dead.
那个小贱人 Oh, that son of a bitch.
我要去找校长谈谈 I'm gonna talk to the principal!
肯尼 把蜡烛放下 Put down the candle, Kenny!
搞得像你真在乎加里·波克维克一样 Like you ever gave a shit about Gary Borkovec!
请进 Entrée vous.
P.C.校长 我费劲唤起同学们对自杀的关注 PC Principal, I'm trying to raise suicide awareness,
可现在大家都专注 but everyone's preoccupied
"开车时请勿玩手机"这破事儿 with this "Don't be on your phone when driving" Crap.
加里·波克维克是个好学生 Gary Borkovec was a good student.
他不该因为有些人 He didn't deserve to be taken away
开车时走神 就这样离开我们 by someone not paying attention to the road.
对 但加里·波克维克已经死了 Yes, but Gary Borkovec is already dead.
我们对他爱莫能助了 There's nothing we can do for him.
同学们应该关注那些企图自杀的人 Students need to focus on people thinking about dying.
我不懂你还想要我怎样 兄弟 I don't know what more you want from me, bro.
只凭一段说唱没法唤醒大家的意识 I can't just get people to care with a stupid rap song.
我要一整支管弦乐队... 管乐加弦乐... I need a full orchestra... Woodwinds, strings...
我要穿着白袍的黑人 I need black people in white robes,
穿着黑袍的白人 white people in black robes,
还要放飞一千只和平鸽 and a thousand doves to release into the air.
我能提供两个学生志愿者和一只野鸽 I can give you two student volunteers and one pigeon.
你意识到事情的严重性了吗 Do you have any idea how serious this is?
作为一名有自杀意愿的学生 As someone who deals with suicidal thoughts,
我不敢相信学校竟然如此缺乏关心 I cannot believe the lack of concern at this school!
没准我应该去大街上宣告自杀 Maybe I should just take the awareness of my suicide
引起大家的注意 out to the public on the streets!
没准你该去 Maybe you should.
我会去的 Maybe I will!
- 没准你该去 - 我会去的 - Maybe you should. - Maybe I will!
晚上好 推克 Hey, Tweek.
快瞧总统现在又推了啥 Look at what the president tweeted now!
都几点了 兄弟 What time is it, dude?
快看 Just read it!
"朝鲜可没种攻击推克 "North Korea doesn't have the balls to attack Tweek.
他们的蛋就像小汤圆" They have little tiny rice balls."
他们要来搞我了 克雷格 快看新闻怎么说 They're gonna get me, Craig! Look at what's on CNN!
总统的推文显然已吸引了 And the President's tweets have certainly caught
朝鲜的注意 the attention of North Korea,
过去几天内 他们一直在 who have been spending the past several days
观测核弹袭击的可能目标 viewing possible targets for a nuclear strike
预防战争爆发... if war were to break out...
我该怎么办 What am I gonna do?!
你得冷静下来 You gotta calm down.
我怎么冷静得下来 How am I supposed to calm down?!
朝鲜要来搞我了 North Korea is gonna get me!
- 他们要来搞死我了 - 推克推克推克 - They're gonna get me! - Tweek. Tweek. Tweek.
我们把这件事梳理清楚 Let's think this through logically.
朝鲜不会攻击任何人的 懂吗 North Korea isn't going to attack anyone, okay?
他们不会打一场没胜算的仗 明白吗 They're not going to start a war they can't win. Okay?
- 但克雷格我．．． - 推克 - But, Craig, I... - Tweek.
你不能再想这茬事了 You have to stop thinking about it.
这样吧 我们去个好玩的地方 Tell you what, we're gonna go somewhere fun
你就会感觉好点了 and make you feel better.
能抽出一分钟关注下自杀吗 Give a minute of your time for suicide awareness?
自杀很严肃哦 Suicide is serious.
请帮忙告诉凯尔这种人 这事很严肃 Help tell people like Kyle it's not a joke.
你们真棒 出自己的一份力 Hey, good for you guys, trying to help.
没错 让你身边所有人 Yeah, make sure everyone you
都知道这事儿 不然我就要自杀了 know gets involved or else I'm gonna do it.
我们得到了很多关注 艾瑞克 We're getting a lot of attention, Eric.
已有好多孩子在咱的网站上 Our website's already full of kids
说他们有同样的感受 想要求助 saying they feel the same way as you and want to get help.
他们想求助 求助啥 They want to get help? For what?
阻止他们想自杀啊 For wanting to take their own lives.
不 是我想自杀 这才是重点 No, this is about me killing myself.
但卡宝 很多小孩都和你有相同的感受 But, babe, there's a lot of kids who feel the same way you do.
他们满嘴屁话 海蒂 They're full of shit, Heidi.
他们就是想得到关注 They're just trying to get attention.
我去 你不会真在和这群蠢货网聊吧 What, are you actually talking online to these asswipes?!
我以为这是在引起大众的关注 并且帮助别人 I thought this was about raising awareness and helping people.
请谈论自杀问题 #艾瑞克别自杀
所以你就要和每个 So you're just gonna e-mail with
请谈论自杀问题 #艾瑞克别自杀
有鸡鸡又想死的男人发邮件了 every every guy who has a dick and a deathwish?
请谈论自杀问题 #艾瑞克别自杀
你不会就好我们这一口吧 Are we just your type?
- 艾瑞克别说了 - 不听着海蒂 - Eric, come on. - No, look, Heidi.
对不起 是你先对所有人说我想自杀 I'm sorry, but you're the one who started all this
才挑起这一切的 by telling everybody that I was suicidal.
好吗 Okay?
现在我这么做都是被逼的 Now I'm under a lot of pressure to do it.
所以我唯一的选择 就是确保 So the only option I have is to make sure
防范自杀能成为整个镇的 that suicide prevention becomes this entire town's
头等大事 number-one priority!
天呐 你看到 Oh, God, did you see
总统是怎么说亚洲人的吗 what the President said about Asians now?
当心 Look out!
你特么是认真的吗 Oh, are you freakin' serious?
好吧 宝贝 你想先坐哪个 Okay, babe, what do you wanna ride first?
我们在干些啥啊 克雷格 Ugh! What are we doing here, Craig?
我们要让你忘记政治 找点乐子 We're gonna get your mind off politics and have some fun.
那么 你最想坐哪个 Now, what's your favorite ride?
摩天轮 The Ferris wheel!
真是美妙啊 推克 看看这景色 Isn't this lovely, Tweek? Just look at that view.
天呐 Oh, God!
总统又发了条推文 Another tweet from the president!
得了吧 Oh, come on.
"美国为什么要怕朝鲜 "Why would the U.S. Be scared of North Korea?
推克啥都不怕 人家此刻在丹佛的 Tweek is so not scared he's at an amusement park
游乐场里玩呢" in Denver right now."
我滴妈呀 Jesus Christ!
我们赶紧离开这儿 We gotta get outta here!
推克 推克 动动脑子 Tweek! Tweek, use your brain.
朝鲜不会袭击一个游乐场的 North Korea isn't going to attack an amusement park.
这里比哪儿都安全 You're safer here than anywhere.
我的天 Oh, geez.
总统正嘲笑金正恩是个肥侏儒 The president just called Kim Jong-un a fat midget.
现在朝鲜又说他们要... Oh, and now North Korea is saying that they're gonna...
爸 当心 Dad, look out!
见鬼 Oh, shit!
碰碰车
好了 各位 All right, everyone,
请等待你们的碰碰车 please wait for your bumper cars
完全停住 to come to a complete stop.
希望你们喜欢疯狂碰碰车... We hope you enjoyed Crazy Cars...
妈妈 当心 Mommy, look out!
天呐 到底怎么了 Oh, my God, what is that?!
发生了啥 What is that?!
很可能啥事都没有 一切都好 It's probably nothing. Everything's fine.
你能别再那么说了吗 我受不了了 Will you please stop saying that?! I can't take it!
我在努力让你放轻松 I'm trying to make you feel better.
也许我现在根本不想放轻松 Well, maybe I don't wanna feel better right now!
好 但仔细想想 Okay, but think about that.
那丝毫没有逻辑 That actually doesn't make any sense.
你为什么非得这么讲逻辑 Why do you have to be so logical?!
我不需要你一直解决问题 I don't need you to problem-solve all the time,
我只需要你... 我也不知道 I need you to... Agh! I don't know!
推克 亲爱的 整整一周 你都在发癫 Tweek, honey, all week, you've been freaking out,
而我一直被迫去忍受 and I've been the one forced to deal with it.
你根本没有忍受 You haven't been dealing with it,
你只是想让它消失 you've been trying to make it go away
因为我的情绪也快把你逼疯了 because my emotions are freaking you out!
推克 朝鲜没有轰炸任何人 Tweek, North Korea isn't bombing anyone.
因为他们得不到中国的支持 They would lose the support of China,
- 然后就．．． - 你又来了 - and that would be... - There you go again!
别再对我说教了 Stop preaching facts to me!
这不是我想要的 It's not what I need!
真他妈抱歉我能控制住 Well, I'm sorry that I'm actually in control
自己的情绪 小屁孩 of my goddamn emotions, ya baby!
瞧 现在你让我失控了 Oh, see, now you made me lose control of my emotions.
妈个鸡 God damn it.
南方公园小学
克雷格 推克怎么没来学校 Hey Craig, how come Tweek's not at school?
我怎么知道 How should I know?
小情侣吵架了 Uh-oh. Trouble in paradise?
朋友们 推克不想要帮助 懂吗 Look guys, Tweek doesn't want help, okay?
他就想反应过激 He just wants to overreact.
大家稍微安静一下好吗 Hey, guys, could we have your attention?
明晚 我们会举行一场追悼会 Tomorrow night, we'll be having a memorial service
悼念所有因"走神驾驶"酿成惨祸而去世的同学们 for all the students we've lost to distracted driving.
希望大家也把家人带来 We hope you can all bring your families.
好 大家听我说 Cool, yeah. Hey, guys, and
明晚七点半在学校体育馆也有 there's also gonna be a suicide awareness pot luck
一次提高大家防范自杀意识的聚餐 7.30 tomorrow night in the school gymnasium.
我们会玩很多游戏 还会画脸谱 We're gonna have lots of games and face painting,
你们仨想搞啥活动 and what are you guys gonna have?
我们会请一些嘉宾来演讲 We're gonna have some guest speakers
也会给有需要的人提供心理辅导 and also provide grievance counselors for those who need it.
心理辅导... 听起来好有趣哦 Yeah, grievance counseling... That sounds super fun.
听着 朋友们 Listen, guys, there's a very
我很有可能会在明天此时 real chance I might actually do it right in front
当着大家的面自杀 都别错过啊 of everyone tomorrow, so you don't want to miss it.
防范自杀聚餐 各位都来哟 Suicide prevention pot luck, everybody.
艾瑞克 你够了 Eric, you need to stop.
他们做的事情很重要 What they're doing is important.
不就是办个追悼会 有人演讲有人哭吗 They're doing a memorial service with speeches and crying.
能解决什么问题 What's that gonna solve?
艾瑞克 这不是为了解决问题 It's not about problem solving, Eric.
是为了让大家聚在一起 It's about people getting together
勇敢面对他们的情绪 and feeling what they need to feel!
人们有时需要他人来梳理自己的情绪 People need help sorting out their emotions sometimes.
最佳解决方案不总是最快的答案 And the best thing isn't always quick answers,
可能只需陪着他 彼此支持 But just being there, supporting each other
互相倾诉内心的情感 And talking through those feelings.
你太难搞了 You are so up and down.
我不知道你到底想让我怎样 海蒂 I don't know what you want from me, Heidi!
别这样 肯定还有方法 Come on. There has to be a way
能让我们齐心协力 We can all work together, here.
你现在又站他们的队了 So, now you're on their side!
天啦噜 我真的马上就会自杀的 Oh, my God, I'm seriously gonna do it right now!
艾瑞克 Eric!
崔克 怎么了 Tweek! What's going on?
什么 什么怎么了 What? What do you mean what's going on?!
还不就是那些屁事 The same shit that's been going on!
情况一点都没好转吗 Nothing's gotten any better?!
亲娘嘞 你感觉怎么样 Oh, my God, how does that make you feel?
我觉得很害怕 很孤独 I feel scared! I feel alone!
这种感觉一定很难受吧 That must be horrible to feel that way!
光是想到就很难受吧 It must be hard for you to even think!
对 特别难受 It is! It's terrible!
我就知道很难受的 你还有别的感觉吗 I bet it's terrible! What else are you feeling?
我感到无力控制自己的生活 Like I have no control over my life.
好像我只是一盘大棋里的小棋子 Like I'm just a pawn in a big game.
这想法真是好恐怖啊 Oh, that's a terrifying thought.
你感觉被困住了吧 You must feel trapped.
对 困住了 Yeah, like, trapped,
就像完全动弹不了 But, like, completely unable to even move.
天哪 Jesus!
感觉什么解决方法都没有 It's like there's no solution to any of this!
你打算怎么办呢 你能怎么办呢 What are you gonna do? What can you do?
我不知道 也... I don't know. It's... It's like maybe...
也许我得找个方法 Maybe I have to find a way
来找回自己对生活的掌控感 to feel a little in charge of me again.
但这听上去好难 That sounds so insurmountable, though.
你打算怎么开始 How would you even start?
我不知道 但是我必须做点什么 I don't know, but I-I gotta do something about this.
肯定有方法能让我... There's gotta be a way I can...
谢谢你 克雷格 Thank you, Craig.
我想到了 I've got it.
大家的重点都没放对 People aren't focused on the right thing.
我知道该怎么做了 I know what I should do.
好了 大家注意 All right, everyone, listen up.
今晚 有位同学写了一首 Tonight, one of our students has put together a song
有关重大争议的歌 about a very important issue.
这首歌写了在某些特定时刻 It's a song about how there are certain times
大家不要看手机 to not be on your phone.
我希望你们都能认真聆听 I hope you all listen carefully.
♪ 生命在逝去 ♪ ♪ People are dying ♪
♪ 是我们的错 ♪ ♪ The fault is our own ♪
♪ 在你低头玩手机时 ♪ ♪ You can do lots of damage ♪
♪ 就会造成许多破坏 ♪ ♪ When you're on your phone ♪
♪ 我们都要开始 ♪ ♪ We all have to agree ♪
♪ 设法做出改变 ♪ ♪ To change it somehow ♪
♪ 就此发誓 抵制它吧 ♪ ♪ Let's all make a pledge to end it right now ♪
♪ 放下手机 ♪ ♪ Put it down ♪
♪ 别再玩手机 ♪ ♪ Don't be on your phone ♪
♪ 你当总统之时 ♪ ♪ While being President ♪
♪ 放下手机 ♪ ♪ Put it down ♪
♪ 你可能会犯蠢 ♪ ♪ You might do something dumb ♪
♪ 进而酿成惨剧 ♪ ♪ And cause an accident ♪
♪ 我们今天在此宣誓 ♪ ♪ Let all agree here today ♪
♪ 如果我们是美国总统 ♪ ♪ That if we're leader of the USA ♪
♪ 就会放下手机 ♪ ♪ We'll put it down ♪
如果你在今天任意时刻 当上了总统 If at any point today, you're being a president,
放下你的移动设备 put down your mobile device.
♪ 放下手机 ♪ ♪ Put it down ♪
如果我低头玩手机 就不会坐在 If I'm on the phone, I will not get behind
椭圆办公室的桌子后面[总统办公室] the desk of an oval office.
♪ 放下手机 ♪ ♪ Put it down ♪
我在此宣誓 I'll take the pledge!
我在此宣誓 And I'll take the pledge.
♪ 没人在乎 ♪ ♪ No one cares ♪
什么 我当选总统了 What's that? I was just elected president?
好吧 再见 Well, then, goodbye!
♪ 如果你今天是总统 请你放下手机 ♪ ♪ Put it down if you're President today ♪
♪ 当你发现自己今天是总统 ♪ ♪ If you find yourself being President today ♪
你好 布莱恩 看 我当选总统了 Hey Brian, look! I was just elected President.
你真棒 南希 赶紧把手机放下 That's great, Nancy. Now, put down your phone.
对哦 Right!
♪放下手机♪ ♪Ａｈ，ａｈ，ａｈ，ａｈ- ａｈ- ａｈ，ｐｕｔｉｔｄｏｗｎ♪
♪ 请为我国的自杀者起立鼓掌 ♪ ♪ Give a standing ovation for suicide in our nation ♪
♪ 不然我现在就掏肠刮肚 眼皮都不抬 ♪ ♪ Or I will rip my own guts out without one hesitation ♪
♪ 唤起民众的注意力 ♪ ♪ Dedication, that's what it's taken ♪
♪ 付出的代价是献身 ♪ ♪ To waken people to care ♪
♪ 然而未来如此迷茫 ♪ ♪ And still my future's so hazy ♪
♪ 我女票快把我逼疯 ♪ ♪ My girlfriend's making me crazy ♪
♪ 我却还是如此努力 ♪ ♪ But still I'm working so hard ♪
♪ 仍然在尽力撑下去 ♪ ♪ You know, just trying to hold on ♪
♪ 因为我知道 我若离开 你也不会太想我 ♪ ♪ Cuz I know that you don't miss me so much if I was gone ♪
♪ 大家伙都各说各话 ♪ ♪ And all the voices start solo ♪
♪ 但每天我都听到一种声音 ♪ ♪ But every day, I hear them grow ♪
加里·波克维克 被低头族总统误杀
♪ 喊着 艾瑞克 别这么做 ♪ ♪ Saying, Eric, don't do it ♪
♪ 别这么做 别~ ♪ ♪ Don't do it, nooooo ♪
凯莉·莫里斯 被低头族总统误杀
♪ 放下手机 ♪ ♪ Put it down ♪
♪你当总统之时 别再玩手机 ♪ ♪ Don't be on your phone while being president ♪
无数意外 一个对策
无数意外一个对策
无数意外 一个对策
♪ 放下手机 ♪ ♪ Put it down ♪
无数意外 一个对策
♪ 你可能会犯蠢 进而酿成惨剧 ♪ ♪ You might do something dumb and cause an accident ♪
♪ 我们今天在此宣誓 ♪ ♪ We all agree here today ♪
♪ 如果我们是美国总统 ♪ ♪ That if we're leader of the USA ♪
THE SUB-MAN
关注新浪微博 @FIX字幕侠
♪ 我们会放下手机 ♪ ♪ We'll put it down ♪
♪ 放下手机 ♪ ♪ Put it down ♪
我不自杀了 各位 I'm not gonna do it, you guys!
这办法有用 我不自杀了 It worked! I'm not gonna do it!