South Park S22 E03 The Problem with a Poo
《南方公园》第22季 第3集 该屎的麻烦
我到南方公园转一转 享受美好时间
i'm goin' down to south park gonna have myself a time.
黄发垂髫 怡然自乐 到处摆着和善傻脸
friendly faces everywhere.humble folks without temptation.
我到南方公园转一转 烦恼丢到天边
i'm goin' down to south park gonna leave my woes behind.
阡陌交通 车位俨然 人们嚷着"约吗,约吗!"
ample parking day or night.people spouting howdy neighbor.
我到南方公园转一转 好似做大保健
i'm heading down to southpark,gonna see if i can't unwind.
我爱上无脑矫情妹 我屌也爱矫情妹
I like fucking silly bitches and I know my penis likes it.
所以快到南方公园转一转 会会我的小伙伴
so come on down to south park and meet some friends of mine.
😁沙雕字幕组译制
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😁沙雕字幕组译制
??翻译：fiufa Dimitri98 A&K
😁翻译：fiufa Dimitri98 A&K
??校对：熊熊 fiufa 航大小栗旬 A&K
😁校对：熊熊 fiufa 航大小栗旬 A&K
??时间轴： 中关村老实人 The New Kid
😁时间轴： 中关村老实人 The New Kid
﻿诸位 是时候面对一些令人难以承受的真相了
People, it's time we faced some hard truths
整个镇子在向我们索取答案
The town is looking to us for answers
而我们一直在埋头逃避
and all we keep doing is burying our heads
我们需要削减今年圣诞庆祝活动的预算
We need to cut the budget for this year's Christmas pageant
天哪！
My God
我已经让节日活动的负责人过来一趟
I've asked the director of the holiday show to stop by
我们来一同告知他这消息
so we can all give him the news
他不会乖乖接受的
He's not going to take this well
如果他不接受 我们就只能让他走人了
If he doesn't, we should just let him go
是时候了
God knows it's about time
嘿 很多人喜欢他 好吗
Hey, a lot of people like him, all right.
是啊 但很多人认为他臭不可闻
Yeah, and lot of people think he stinks.
让我们了结这件事吧
Let's just get this over with
好 让他进来
All right, send him in
你~们~好~啊
Howwwwdy ho
你们想见我
You wanted to see me
那你们可得快些
Better hurry.
我们离圣诞节只有两个月了
We only have two months before Christmas
汉基先生 我们叫您到这里来是为了通知你
Mr. Hankey, we called you in to let you know that
圣诞庆祝活动的资金已被削减
your Christmas-pageant funding has been cut
直接减半
By half
啥
What
但我手头上的资金才刚刚够办一趟好的圣诞展会呀
But I can barely make a good Christmas show with what I have
我们不过是没有像之前一样支持圣诞展会
We just don't have the support for the Christmas show that we used to.
有些人认为你令人不快
The truth is, some people find you offensive.
令人不快？我怎么令人不快了？
Offensive? What about me is offensive
有些人认为屎
Some people think that shit
并不是圣诞节的最好代表
isn't the best representation of Christmas
你们 你们不能这么做
You.You people can't do this
圣诞节是一年中最为神奇的时间
Christmas is the most magical time of the year
大家已经决定了
The decision has already been made.
谢谢你 汉基先生 祝您的展会好运
Thank you, Mr. Hankey, and good luck with the show.
好 停下
Okay, stop.
孩子们 这首歌叫《闪亮的圣诞节》
Kids, the song's called "Deck the Halls,"
不是《都来舔蛋》
not "Let's All Suck Balls."
现在 加油 孩子们
Now, come on, kids
为什么我们要现在做这个
Why do we have to do this now
是啊 现在万圣节都还没到呢
Yeah, It's not even Halloween yet
RH两周前就已经挂起了他们的圣诞节装饰 好吗
Restoration Hardware put up their Christmas decorations two weeks ago, all right
注：Restoration Hardware是美国的家具和家居用品品牌连锁店
现在听好 我也不想这样
Now, listen, I didn't want this, either
我想要丹佛交响乐团来演出
I wanted the Denver Symphony
但他们削减了我的预算 现在我只能靠你们了
But they cut my budget, and I'm stuck with you
现在 从头开始
Now, let's take it from the top
女强人副校长
Vice Principal Strong Woman
有什么事 PC校长
Yes, PC Principal
我想你是否想
I was seeing if there's anything
同我讨论一些事情
you might want to discuss with me
我们有什么需要讨论的吗
What would we need to discuss
我很抱歉利用了我的职权
I am so sorry that I took advantage of my position
操纵你让你成为我的性伴侣
and manipulated you into a physical encounter
嘿 我是女强人 对吗
Hey, I am a strong woman, all right
我不会被操纵
I don't get manipulated.
我们都对于
We both are guilty
这一工作场合的不当关系负有责任
of an ill-advised relationship at the workplace
但那是很久之前的事情了
but that was long ago
我已经决定继续前行了
and I have decided to move forward
你确定我们能继续前行
Are you sure we can move forward
为什么不呢？我们犯了错误 我们继续前行
Why not? We make a mistake, we move forward.
我只是觉得可能依然会有一些余波
I was just thinking be some fallout from
不 我们会忘掉它
Nope. We're just gonna forget about it
然后让它归于平静
and put it to rest
你认为真的没有什么东西
You don't think there's anything else
要谈的吗
to dis to discuss
不 没有 再见
No, I don't. Bye-bye
老兄 凯尔 老兄
Dude. Kyle. Dude
老兄 啥
Dude. What
你看汉基先生昨晚的推特了吗
Did you read what Mr. Hankey tweeted last night
他发了啥
What Mr. Hankey tweeted
嗯 我想在乐队排练之后
Yeah, I guess after band rehearsals
他在推特上谈论了我们
he went on Twitter to talk about us
看
Look
哦 上帝呀
Oh. Jesus Christ, dude
圣诞老人在路上
Santa Claus is on his way
他把货物装满雪橇
He's loaded goodies on his sleigh
他将在圣诞节发放它们
He'll drop 'em off on Christmas Day
汉基先生
Mr. Hankey
哦 凯尔
Oh, Kyle
你~好~呀
Howwwwwdy ho
汉基先生 所有人都对你很生气
Mr. Hankey, everyone's really mad at you
你昨天发了推特吗？
Were you on Twitter last night?
是的没错
Yeeeahhhh.
你是否发了：南方公园的孩子个个都是不会演奏音乐的可恶同性恋
Did you tweet, "The kids of South Park are retarded homos who can't play music"?
是…的
Eeeeeyeeaaahhhhh
你为什么要发这样的推
Why would you tweet that
所有孩子都快气疯了
All the kids are really pissed off
这是个开的不好的玩笑 我很抱歉
It was a bad attempt at a joke. I'm sorry
你能告诉孩子们我不是故意的吗
Will you please tell the kids I didn't mean it
你想让我怎么说
What do you want me to say
事实上 我昨晚睡不着
The fact is, I couldn't sleep last night
所以我吃了些安必恩
so I took some Ambien
注：安必恩“Ambien”是一种有效治疗失眠的处方安眠药
你也吃过那玩意
You ever take that stuff
它把我的脑子搅成了一锅粥
It turns your brains into oatmeal
求求你 凯尔 告诉孩子们我没有恶意
Please, Kyle, tell the kids I didn't mean any harm
我们得集中注意在圣诞节上
We've gotta focus on Christmas
好了 大家注意
All right, everyone, listen up
副校长今天已经和你们讲过
The vice principal has asked to speak with you today
她认为现在是我们作为校集体
She believes it is time that we all as a school
来讨论体外受精的时候了
finally discussed in vitro fertilization
是的 孩子们
That's right, kids
现如今许多女性选择在没有男人的情况下生孩子
Many women today make the choice to have children without a man in their lives
她们可以在实验室中用一个陌生人的精子
They can have their eggs fertilized
来让自己的卵子受精
by an unknown person's sperm in a lab.
是的 女强人
That's right, Strong Woman
在当今社会中一个孕妇和男人发生过关系的假设是错误的
In today's society, it is wrong to just assume that a pregnant woman had intercourse with a man
在校的学生需要小心
St-Students at this school need to be careful
因为提出诸如“孩子父亲是谁？”之类的问题可能会冒犯他人
because it can be offensive to asks questions like "Who's the father?"
你还好吗？女强人？
You -- You all right, Strong Woman
我没事
I'm fine
所以 - 所以 我们希望所有的学生今晚与父母谈谈
So -- So, we'd like to have all our students talk to their parents tonight
关于体外受精 之后
about in vitro fertilization, and after that
让我们把整个问题抛在脑后
let's just put the whole issue behind us
那是我的羊水破了
That's my water breaking
没什么大不了的
Not a big deal.
圣诞节
Christmas time
是圣诞节
It's Christmas time
圣诞节
Christmas time
耶 圣诞节
Yeah, Christmas time
汉基
Hankey
我们需要谈谈你发的推文
We need to talk about what you tweeted
哦 我非常抱歉
Oh, I'm so sorry
两天前我吃了安眠药
I took Ambien two nights ago
所以才把孩子们称为同性恋
and I called the schoolkids homos
不 我说的是你昨晚发的推文
No, I'm talking about what you tweeted last night
“市议会成员
"The city council members
是一群舔阴的伊斯兰教徒
are a bunch of pussy-licking Islamists
哦 哦 天哪 我这么说吗？
Oh. Oh, geez. Did I say that?
听着 如果你累了睡不着
Listen, if you're tired and you can't sleep
不要吃安眠药
do not take Ambien
好吗？呼
Okay? Whew
恐怕我们作为市议会的执行计划经理
I'm afraid we have no other option but to fire you
除了解雇你别无选择
as executive planning manager of the city council
开除我
Fire me
不不不 拜托 我真的很抱歉
No, no, no, please. I'm really sorry
不 等等！等等
No, wait! Wait
请再给我一次机会
Please give me another chance
不要这样！圣诞节怎么办？
Don't do this! What about Christmas
没事 我们马上就到医院
It's okay. We'll be at the hospital soon
保持呼吸
Just keep breathing
我不需要你的帮助
I didn't need your help.
我只是作为同事想帮助另一位有需要的同事
I'm just a co-worker helping another co-worker in need
是的 好吧 人们可不会这么想
Yeah, well, people might get the wrong idea
我一生都在工作
I have worked my whole life
要成为最强大的女人
to be the strongest woman possible
一个让小女孩钦佩的人
a person little girls could look up to
如果那些女孩认为我是那种类型
If those girls thought that I was the type
被上级“帮助”
to get knocked up by my boss
我当然不想往身为女性的你身上加压
I certainly do not want to put any pressure on you as a female
但有时我想知道是否还有更多我们应该讨论的问题
but at times I wonder if there is more we should discuss
没什么可讨论的！
There's nothing to discuss
我犯了个错误 我正勇往直前
I made a mistake, and I am moving forward
我的公民权利遭到了侵犯
My civil rights are under attack
他们不能从圣诞节表演中炒掉我
They can't just fire me from the Christmas show
整件事都是我的杰作！
The whole thing is my creation
呃 昨晚 你发推说
Uh, last night, you tweeted
市议会可以吸我的墨西哥大屌
"The city council can suck my Mexican dick."
这是个玩笑话
It was a joke
看着我！我甚至没有丁丁
Look at me! I don't even have a dick!
明白吗
Get it
好 好 看 我知道 这不是一个好笑话
Okay, okay, look, I know -- It wasn't a good joke
但这真的不是我的错
But it really wasn't my fault
事实上 我昨晚回家了 我很生气
The fact is, I went home last night, and I was angry
我睡不着 所以我吃了些安眠药
I couldn't sleep, so I took some Ambien
然后我开始发推
And then I started tweeting
安眠药让我昏了头
Ambien messes with my head.
你吃过那玩意吗
You ever take that crap
你想让我们以此来对付安眠药公司
You want us to take this up against Ambien
他们拥有世界上最好的律师
They have the best lawyers in the world
好吧 我想也许我可以赢过他们
Well, I thought maybe I could get them
在一场便便诉讼中
in a defecation lawsuit
哎呀
Argh
我永远不会说那些话
And I never, ever would've said those things
关于市议会但安眠药让我脑子瓦特了
about the city council but the Ambien makes me kind of black out.
对不起 先生 但我们不能代表一坨屎
I'm sorry, sir, but we don't represent pieces of shit
为什么不能
Why not
（愤怒）
Argh
我想也许我们可以
And I just thought maybe we could
说服市议会雇回我
convince the city council to hire me back
我很抱歉 但很久以前我就知道
Look, I'm sorry, but I learned a long time ago
为你辩护 如入鲍鱼之肆
that if you defend poop, you get stained
汉基先生
Mr. Hankey
哦 凯尔
Oh. Kyle
（无力）你...好
Howwwwdy ho.
你在这里做什么
What are you doing here
只是想得到一些帮助
Just trying to find some help
镇上没有律师帮我去
There isn't a lawyer in town who will take me
等一下 - 你！
Wait a minute -- You
你是律师的儿子
You're the son of a lawyer
你身上流着律师的血！
You have lawyer blood inside your veins
你可以在诉讼中为我澄清 凯尔
You can help me with my defecation lawsuit, Kyle
我？我能做什么
Me? What can I do
拜托了 凯尔
Please, Kyle
你是唯一可以帮助我的人
You're the only person left who can help me
你和我 伙计 我们要挑战这个体制
You and me, pal, we are gonna fight the system
找班德博士
Paging Dr. Bender
你的副校长生了五个孩子
Your vice principal gave birth to all five babies
没用硬膜外麻醉
with no epidural
我必须说 她是一个非常坚强的女人
I must say, she's a very strong woman.
没错
That she is.
五胞胎都很健康而且在休息
The quintuplets are all healthy and resting away.
她的宝宝在那
There are her babies right there
天哪 伙计 老兄
Oh, dude. Bro
是的 可爱的小东西 不是吗
Yes, cute, little buggers, aren't they
三个男孩和两个女孩
Three boys and two girls
我认为强制性别规范是不对的
I think it's wrong to force gender specification upon them
在他们这个年龄
at this young age
有意思 这正是他们母亲所说的
Funny. That's exactly what their mother said
五胞胎都是都是白种人 蓝眼睛
The quints are all Caucasian, blue-eyed
还有点奇怪的事情
and something kind of weird
什么
What's that
嗯 宝宝都是极端的PC
Well, the babies are all extremely PC
我从没见过这种
the likes of which I have never seen.
看这个
Watch this.
三个黑人走进酒吧
Three black guys walk into a bar
没事没事
It's okay! It's okay
他们走了 他们走了
They left! They left
医生 我可不可以
Doctor, would it be possible for me
抱一下PC宝宝
to hold the PC Babies?
抱歉 只有父母可以这么做
I'm sorry. That's only for the mother and father.
然而 据副校长说
Though, according to the vice principal
他们的父亲甚至不存在
the father doesn't even exist
各位 嘿各位
You guys! Hey, guys
我想我知道了！ 什么
I think I figured it out. What
如何再给汉基先生一次机会
How to get Mr. Hankey another chance
市议会有附则
There's by-laws in the city council
社区服务领导者
that community service leaders
没有听证会就不能被解雇
can't be terminated without a hearing
我需要你们作为见证人
I need you guys there as character witnesses.
不
N-N-Nope.
不要让我沾上屎味
Not getting the stink on me.
他有权发表意见
He has a right to be heard.
他对这个城镇意义重大
He's meant a lot to this town.
老兄 你为什么一直在为他辩护 凯尔
Dude, why do you keep defending him, Kyle
是的 你知道镇上的每个人都认为他只是一坨屎
Yeah, you know everyone in town thinks he's a piece of shit
拜托了伙计们 我们不能弃之不顾
Come on, guys. We can't just turn our backs.
汉基先生帮我们度过多少次难关
How many times has Mr. Hankey been there for us
嗯 有一次 算是吧
Mmm, once, kind of
看 他昏了头
Look, he messed up
但我不知道他是否应当
but I don't know if he deserves everything
承担这些后果
that's coming down on him
我想站在我朋友身边
I wanna stand by my friend
嗯 让我们看看你2018年会怎么样
Mm, let's see how that goes for you in 2018
副校长
Vice Principal
我的孩子们！他们在哪
My babies! Where are they
嘘 没关系 宝宝们很好
Shh. It's okay. The babies are fine
在婴儿室休息
Resting in the nursery
他们是最
They're the most
他们是我见过的最PC的宝宝
They're the most PC babies I've ever seen
你不应该在这里
You shouldn't be here
人们会起疑心
People will start getting suspicious
看 我就是那个滥用职权的人
Look, I was the one who abused my position
并利用下属
and took advantage of a subordinate
没有人利用我！没有利用
Nobody took advantage of me! Not took advantage.
你知道我在说什么 我是个女强人
You know what I'm saying. And I'm a strong woman
我想做的就是帮你
All I want to do is help
我们可以说我是男保姆
We can say I'm the manny
如果有人有问题
And if anyone has a problem with that
他们有性别歧视的问题
then they have a problem with gender biases
我可以当挡箭牌
and they can take it up with me
我们可以完全掩盖关于宝宝的真相
We can keep the truth about the babies totally hidden
哦 是的 那个课程应该
Oh, yes, that curriculum should be fine
对学生很有益
for the students
我将开始制定全校提案
I'll start working on an all-school proposal
哦 是的 非常好 副校长
Oh, yes, very good, Vice Principal
希望它是通过返校之夜完成的
See that it is done by back-to-school night
好的 妈咪
All right, Mommy
你的小宝贝们就在这里
Your little bundles of joys are here
哦 这是谁
Oh, and who's this
我是男保姆
I am the manny
有问题吗？
Anyone have a problem with that
哦 没有没有
No, not at all
这里一切都好吗
Everything good here
噢！这些是PC婴儿
Aw! Are these PC babies
现在 镇法院直播
And now, live from the town courthouse
这是南方公园第十三号 汉基先生听证会
It's the Hankey Hearings on South Park 13
汉基先生
Mr. Hankey
注：该场景影射美国大法官候选人布雷特·卡瓦诺性侵事件听证会
14小时前 你有没有说过
14 hours ago, did you or did you not say
南方公园里的每个人都是个该死的混蛋
Everyone in South Park is a goddamn douche bag
是的
Yes
那只是个糟糕的圣诞节笑话
That was a bad attempt at a Christmas joke
但此言论中并没有圣诞节的相关内容
But there's nothing in that statement about Christmas
我说过的 这是一次糟糕的尝试
That's was I said, it was a bad attempt
该言论的哪一部分
What part of the statement was actually
你想听一个好的圣诞节笑话吗
You wanna hear a good Christmas joke
在2005年 你说
In 2005, you said that
你说你没有回忆
You said that you had no recollection
抱歉 我流鼻涕了
Sorry. I got the sniffles
汉基先生 你是否了解
Mr. Hankey, do you understand
这些陈述有多重要
how important these statements are
对于这个镇的公民
to the citizens of this town
我只知道还有八周就要圣诞节了
All I understand is, it's only eight weeks until Christmas
如果我们不停止浪费时间
If we don't stop wasting our time
我们都会错过
we're all gonna miss out
一年中最精彩的部分
on the most magical part of the whole year
昨晚你的推文是什么意思
What did you mean last night when you tweeted
南方公园的市长是一个没有乳头的荡妇
The Mayor of South Park is a titless whore
哦拜托 只是个玩笑
Oh, come on! It was a joke
就是这样 就是这样
That's it! That's it
我已经受够了
I've had enough of this whole sham
我操你们妈！还有整个体制！
fuck all you and fuck this whole system!
圣诞节到了
It's Christmastime
这很好
It's okay
（哄小孩的声音）
Shh.
我们只需要一些尿布
We just need to get some diapers
（哄小孩的声音）
Shh
哦 多么可爱的小宝宝
Oh, what adorable little babies
谢谢
Thank you
喔 他们看起来很PC
My, they look very PC
哦不 不
Oh no, no
他们根本不是PC
They're not very PC, at all
噢！看那PC宝宝
Aww! Look at the PC babies
他们实际上不是PC
They actually aren't PC
不是吗
No
你听说莫妮卡莱温斯基成为共和党人了吗
Did you hear Monica Lewinsky's becoming a Republican
注：指前总统比尔·克林顿与白宫女实习生莫妮卡·莱温斯基的丑闻 即“拉链门”
民主党人在她口中留下了不好的味道
The Democrats left a bad taste in her mouth.
（哄笑）
laughing
天啊 嘘！不 不 不 不 不
Oh, God. Shhhh! No, no, no, no, no
一切还好吗
Is everything all right
哦 看！更多PC宝宝！他们到处都是
Oh, look! More PC babies! They're everywhere
我告诉过你我们要分开购物
I told you we need to shop separately.Shh Shh
打扰了 东方食品区在哪里
Excuse me, where is the Oriental food aisle
嘘！安静！这是PC宝宝
Shhh! Quiet! There's PC babies
哎
Gee-whiz
谢谢你和我一起出来 凯尔
Thanks for comin' out with me, Kyle
这些天 大概你是我唯一的朋友
These days, it's like you're my only friend
那么计划是什么
So what's the plan, huh
你怎样拿回我的工作
What you got figured out to get my job back
我是有计划
I had a plan
你却把市长称为没有乳头的荡妇
You decided to call the mayor a titless whore
哦 这是个玩笑 凯尔
Oh, it was a joke, Kyle
有时 当我服用安眠药时
Sometimes, when I take Ambien
第二天我真的昏昏沉沉
I'm really groggy and moody the next day
这真的是它的副作用
It's a real side affect
它印在瓶子上
it's printed right on the bottle
我不知道我还可以为你辩护多久
I don't know how much longer I can defend you
人们开始认为我很恶心
People are starting to think I'm shitty
凯尔 难道你不明白这一切
Kyle, don't you understand this whole thing
是一次诽谤事件
is a smear campaign
为什么人们会关注一些我说的蠢话
Why are people focusing on a few stupid words I said
当圣诞节即将来临之时
when Christmas is just around the corner
这就像每个人都忘了圣诞节的内涵
It's like everyone's forgot about what Christmas means
哦 我的上帝
Oh, my God
凯尔！就是它！节日精神
Kyle! That's it! The holiday spirit
现在是十月
It's October
这就是重点！你不明白吗
And that's the point! Don't you see
我们需要
What we need to do
让每个人都有在圣诞节的心情
is get everyone in the Christmas mood
我们可以提前带来整个圣诞的精神
We can bring the whole spirit of the holidays early
好的 你去干吧
Okay, you do that
不不不 凯尔 你得帮我
No, no, no. Kyle, you gotta help me
我不能一个人干
I can't do this alone.
我有作业和事情要做
I have homework and stuff!
你是我的全部
You're all I have
甚至我妻子都带着孩子们走了
Even my wife left with the nuggets
因为这些压力
because of all the pressure
好吧
Okay, fine
我会帮你
I'll help you
但听我说
But listen to me
我不在乎你今晚多么焦虑
I don't care how restless you get tonight
不许吃安眠药
No Ambien
好吧 如果我真的无法入睡 也许只吃一点
Well, maybe just a "liddol" if I really can't sleep
不 一点也不行
No! None
如果你这次需要我的帮助
If you want my help this time
今晚你就不能吃安眠药 这就是条件
you aren't taking any Ambien tonight, this's the deal.
好极了！就这么定咯
Yay! It's a deal
好家伙！凯尔 我很兴奋
Oh, boy! Kyle, I'm so excited
我们将把圣诞精神
We're gonna bring the spirit of Christmas
带给南方公园
to South Park
看 是PC宝宝啊
Aww, look at the little PC babies
呃 不是 我们是密苏里州的
Uh, no. We're from Missouri
我一看就知道是PC宝宝
I know a PC baby when I see one
是谁热爱主持社会公平
Who loves social justice
谁是我们的未来 谁是我们可怕的未来
Who's the future? Who's the big bad future
对 就是他们 PC宝宝
Yes, they are
哇 PC宝宝们
Aww, PC babies
好吧 大家请让一让
All right. Please, move along folks
我们不想让宝宝被吓到了
We don't want the babies to get excited.
你好啊 南方公园
Hello, South Park
大家快来 都来这边
Come on, everybody! Get over here
接下来就是见证奇迹的时刻
Who wants to see a miracle
大家好！
Howwwwdy ho, everyone
猜猜现在是什么时间
Guess what time it is
现在是圣诞庆祝时间
It's Christmastime
哇哦！
Ohhhhh
装饰一遍大厅 修剪好圣诞树
Deck the halls and trim the trees
圣诞将至
Christmastime is here
一起歌唱 忘掉烦恼
Gonna sing and flush our worries away
这是一年中最美的时光
It's the best time of the year
各位 就是这样 你们爱圣诞节吗
That's right, everybody! Who loves the holidays
就像基督诞生那天一样
Just like when Christ was born
我们要和父母在一起
let's all be with our mothers and fathers
也不要忘了全世界的小男孩小女孩 他们
Let's not forget that boys and girls all over the world are
喂 喂 注意点 你让这些PC宝宝不高兴了
Hey! Hey, careful! You're upsetting the PC babies
PC什么来着？听着
The PC what? Listen
圣诞节的意义就是庆祝世界的和平
Christmas season means peace on earth
和表达人们美好的祝愿
and good will towards men
呃..听着 节日中最重要的是什么
Uh, uh, look, what is the holiday season about
就是我们相亲相爱 不是吗
It's about loving each other, right
爱戴..什么啊？怎么了
Loving and -- What
他们现在还哭什么啊
What are they crying about now
有时候PC宝宝就是没有理由 瞎几把哭
Sometimes, PC Babies don't even know what they're crying about
那就告诉他们闭上臭嘴
Well, then tell the babies to shut the fuck up
到底是谁TM会带小孩来看圣诞节表演啊
Who the brings a goddamn baby to a Christmas show anyway
汉基先生 别说了
Mr. Hankey, stop
放开我 凯尔 这些人全TM是蠢货
Lemme go, Kyle! These people are idiots
妈咪 好臭啊
Mommy, something stinks
对啊 是屎
Yeah, like shit
你竟然支持一坨屎？王八蛋
You stand up for all pieces of crap? Asshole
啊哈？2018
Uh-huh. 2018
凯尔 听我说 凌晨3点的时候
Kyle, listen.It was 3:00 a.m. last night
我还是睡不着 所以我...
and I still hadn't slept, so I d
凯尔
Kyle
凯尔 求你了 他们会把我赶出这儿的
Kyle, please.They're gonna run me out of town, Kyle
他们会把我和我曾经的努力都抹去的
They're going to erase me and everything I ever did
所以你想让他们也把我抹掉？
You want them to erase me, too?
凯尔 我们都会有搞砸的时候
Kyle... we can all be shitty sometimes
他们都好坚强 就像他们的妈妈一样
They're so strong like their mother
他们都好PC 就像.管他们爸爸是谁呢
They're so PC, like whoever their father is
我们无法让他们安静下来
We'll never keep them quiet
唯一的希望就是一直藏着他们
Our only hope is to keep them hidden
他们永远都不能知道我是他们的父亲吗
Can they ever know that I'm their dad
我们做出了世界上最不PC的事
We did the most un-PC thing imaginable
你想想 那会对他们造成什么影响
Think about what that would do to them
我们永远不能让他们知道是我们俩的奸情
We can never let them know the debaucherous
把他们带到了这个世界
sickening circumstances that brought them into this world
那我只能尽我所能做他们的好校长了
Then, I'll just try to be the best principal to them that I possibly can
那么我将是他们最坚强的副校长
And I'll be their strongest vice principal
希望..这个世界能够冷静下来
and hopefully... the world will calm down
不要激怒他们
and not do anything to upset them
今天 南方公园要对汉基先生说再见了
Today...South Park says goodbye to Mr. Hankey
镇上和这个圣诞假期人物形象的长期合作
The longtime union of this town and the holiday figure
永远的结束了
is over for good
我们都应该为自己感到非常自豪
We should all feel pretty great about ourselves
轻轻的拍一下自己的后背
give ourselves a little, nice pat on the back
作为我们每个人 作为一个社会
as we, as a society, continue
将会继续扫除每一坨屎
to try and sweep away all the poop
大家 这可能就是永别了
Well, everyone I guess this is goodbye
当然我们曾经相处得很好
It sure has been swell
并不 别说了 你只需要离开就好了
No good-byes, Hankey. You just need to go
你对我们来说就是一坨"扫兴屎"
We've already called you a "Poober"
"扫兴屎"？还有这一说？
A Poober -- They have that
噢 意思是要我离开
Oh, you mean Lyft.
好吧 大家再见
Well, okay. Goodbye, everyone
希望我至少曾给你们的内心深处 带去过一些欢声笑语
I hope I brought a few smiles and a few laughs into your hearts.
汉基先生 再见了
Goodbye, Mr. Hankey
他会去哪呢
Where will he go
他只能找个能容忍一坨像他这样种族歧视的坏屎的地方了
He'll have to find a place that accepts racist, awful beings like him
外面的世界很大 总有能容忍偏执和仇恨的地方
There are still places out there who don't care about bigotry and hate
大家好
Howwwwwdy ho
酷啊 会说话的屎
Cool, man. Talking crap
欢迎你来这 朋友
Welcome, my friend
找个地方歇歇脚 把这当成家吧
Please, rest your wary feet and make yourself at home here
好哇
Hooray