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获取SP资源，了解本剧资料，欢迎访问：
1、zh.southpark.wikia.com （需要翻墙）
2、coloradotownpxy.xyz/zh（无需翻墙）
本字幕仅供学习交流 禁止用于商业盈利
嘿 爸爸 你觉得我们今天能去造熊工坊吗？ Hey, Dad, you think maybe we could go to Build-A-Bear today?
※一家提供“自己做毛绒玩具”服务的真实零售商店
巴特斯 我再说最后一次 你不能去造熊工坊 Butters, for the last time, you can't go to Build-A-Bear
但是他们说他们已经开业了 所以我… But they said they were open again, so I...
他们是开业了 但我们可不是约翰逊一家 Yes, they're open, but we are not the Johnsons
※一部恶搞《辛普森一家》的动画 主角均为黑人
而且我们不会去管那些不必要的事 And we do not go to non-essential businesses
因为它就是不必要的！ When it's non-essential!
嘿 你们这些人长脑子了吗？ Hey, do you people mind?
你们应该把口罩盖住鼻子 You're supposed to wear your mask over your nose
看上去你们跟下巴上挂了个尿布一样 Looks like you're wearing a diaper for your chin
下巴挂尿布是没用的 Chin diapers don't help
什么？ What the?
发生什么事了？ What's going on now?
城镇广场有事！大家都往那边去了! Something at the town square! Everyone's gathering!
好吧 我们这是在抗议 还是在暴乱? Well, are we protesting, or are we rioting?
不 不 这次和疫情有关！ No, no. It's something to do with the pandemic!
有大事发生了 Something big's going on
待在这里别动 巴特斯 Stay here, Butters
大家好 能听到我讲话吗？ Hey, everybody. Can everyone hear me okay?
谢谢各位捧场 Thanks for turning out, everyone
你们都知道 我们在过去几个月里都经历了很多 You know, we've all been through a lot these past several months
我们关门歇业了 很多人都没了生意 We've shut down, and people have lost their businesses
难以维系生计 Lost their livelihoods
我也经营着一个小本生意 I also own a small business
我经销大麻 I sell weed
不得不说我… And I have to say I...
我的生意很不错 I'm actually doing pretty good
真的非常惊人 Amazing, really
自从三月份开始封城之后 Tegridy Farms' weed has seen a 400% increase in sales
节草农场的大麻销售额增长了400% Since the shutdown in March
我看到托马斯·特纳站在那儿 I see Thomas Turner out there
托马斯在南园南开了一家餐厅 Thomas opened a restaurant in SoDoSoPa
现在看起来不像是个好主意 是不是啊 特纳? Doesn't seem like such a good idea now, does it, Turner?
还有玛蕾·贾维斯 And there's Marley Jarvis
她自己开了一家日光浴沙龙 Who owned and operated her own tanning salon
啊噢 Whoops
但我不能只是站在这里幸灾乐祸 But I can't just stand here and gloat
因为节草农场是为了回报大家 Because Tegridy Weed is about giving back to people
所以我非常自豪地宣布 And that's why I'm very proud to announce
节草大麻将迎来疫情特售！ That Tegridy Weed is having a Pandemic Special!
我们将最好的大麻进行杂交得到的品种 An all-new hybrid of our best weed
将以九折的价格出售 Sold at nearly 10% off our usual price
不仅如此 如果你购买3镑或者以上 Not only that, but when you buy three pounds or more
的疫情特售大麻 Of the Pandemic Special
我们将赠送您一个2020疫情款水烟枪 You get a complimentary Pandemic 2020 bong
我们是一个社区 We are a community
让我们有节操地团结在一起 Let's all be together with Tegridy
我觉得人们真的很兴奋 I think people are really excited
你觉得呢 What do you think?
疫情特售 兰迪？ 认真的吗？ A Pandemic Special, Randy? Really?
咋了？ What?
人们在受苦 People are hurting
人们在死去 兰迪 People are dying, Randy
而你却想借此大捞一笔？ And all you can think about is making a special about it?
我正在做一些积极的事情来帮忙啊 I'm doing something positive to try and help
人们现在真的很需要这个 People really need this right now
你太幼稚了 兰迪！ You are a child, Randy!
现在是非常严峻的时刻 现在没有人想要 These are very serious times, and nobody wants
或是在乎你那愚蠢的特售 Or cares about your stupid special right now!
大家喜欢不喜欢 我们走着瞧 We'll see if they like my special
南方公园
疫情特辑
The Pandemic Special
*哇* Wow!
*又是宅在家的一天 什么事也不用做* Another day inside, don't have to do a thing
*我爱你 社交距离* I love you, social distancing
*没人在我身边 没人跟我说话* No one's around, no one's talking to me
*保持社交距离 我自由了* Social distancing, I'm free
*不需刷牙或洗澡* Don't have to brush my teeth or shower
*为啥要做这些？* For what?
*我可以几小时都坐在马桶上* I can sit on the toilet for hours
*我想坐多久坐多久！* As long as I want!
*因为没人跟我说* 'Cause no one's saying to me
*你们这些孩子应该出去做点什么* You kids should get outside and do something
哦！九点了 该上课了！ Oh! 9:00 a.m. Time for school!
早上好 孩子们 Good morning, guys
大家都准备好上课了吗？ Everyone ready to start school?
好的 我想你们应该都到齐了 Okay, I think we're all here
我看到吉米和克莱德也上线了 I see Jimmy and Clyde are on now
埃里克 你在吗？ Eric, are you there?
在 老师 我在 Yes, Teacher, I'm here!
我都迫不及待想要开始上-上- I can't wait to start schoo-- schoo--
课-呃…呃… Schoo-- eh...eh...
哦 不 埃里克 我觉得你的电脑又卡了 Oh, no, Eric, I think your computer is freezing up again
哦 不 真的吗？你们能听到我吗？ Oh, no. Really? Can you guys hear me?
我刚刚说-呃 I just said...Eh
呃 呃 呃 Eh. Eh. Eh
埃里克 你之后要再听一遍课 可以吗 Eric, you'll just have to listen again, okay?
你尽力吧 那么我们还是上课吧 孩子们 Best you can. So let's start today, guys
复习一下昨天的语法示例 By going over yesterday's grammar examples
温蒂 你能读下第一句吗? Wendy, can you read the first one?
*我与世界隔绝了* I'm cut off from the world
*独自 一人* Isolated, alone
*这就是我所说的存在* This is what I call existancing
*没有人能碰我 对我指手画脚* No one can touch me or boss me around
*保持社交距离* Social distancing
埃里克 你不是应该在Zoom上网课吗? Eric, aren't you supposed to be on your Zoom call?
※一款在线视频会议软件
*离我远点 老妈 耶* Stay away from me, Mom, yeah
*我们要保持社交距离* You got to keep your social distance
*因为我要做的就是歌唱* 'Cause all I'm gonna do is sing
*我有多爱你 有多需要你* About how much I love you and I need you
*保持社交距离* Social distancing
亲爱的 我知道现在日子很艰难 Sweetie, I know these are challenging times
是的 保持社交距离 老妈 Yeah, social distancing, Mom
但我们仍然要努力做好自个的工作 But we all still have to try and do our work
电脑一直都在卡着 老妈 Computer keeps freezing, Mom
如果你的工作更重要些 Maybe if you were an essential worker
我们没准就买得起更快的网 We could afford faster Internet
你至少需要完成一些作业 好吗? I at least need you to get some of your homework done, okay?
然后 或许可以去洗个澡 And then m-maybe take a shower
哦 我们这一代人被剥夺了自己生活的时候 Oh, what a folly a shower seems
洗澡是多么荒唐啊 When my generation is being denied their lives!
我见不到我的朋友 我甚至不能去上学 I can't see my friends. I can't even go to school
我好想念凯尔 呵呵呵呵 How I miss Kyle. Heh heh heh heh
亲爱的 这一切很快就会结束的 Sweetie, it's all going to be over soon
他们其实在讨论复学的事了 They're actually talking about school opening up again
说几天后就开学！ In a few days!
你他妈说什么？ What the fuck are you talking about?
到时候有一个大型会议 There's going to be a big meeting
听说他们想让你们这些孩子回学校！ Sounds like they're trying to get you kids back to school!
我们不能回学校！外面在他妈的闹疫情啊！ We can't go back to school. There's a fucking pandemic!
但是他们在讨论让你们隔天交错开来 But they're talking about maybe staggering you kids every other day...
他们不能这么做! They can't do that!
埃里克 你这样可以 Eric, you're going to be able
和其他孩子重聚的！ To be with all the other kids again!
哦 不 我懂了！世界上发生着这么多可怕的事 Oh, no, I see! There's all this horrible stuff going on in the world
但显然卡特曼的命不是命！ But apparently Cartman's life doesn't matter!
-埃里克 你不能 -啊 后退！后退！ -Eric, you can't... -Ahp! Get back! Get back!
六英尺 老妈！他妈的六英尺！ Six feet, Mom! Six fucking feet!
好的 非常感谢！ Okay. Thank you very much!
希望你享受这个疫情特售！ Hope you enjoy the Pandemic Special!
嗨！来这儿买特售大麻？给你 Hi! You here for the special? Here you go
上课上得怎么样 斯坦？ How was school, Stanley?
那不是上课 那就是一个天大的笑话 It's not school. It's a frickin' joke
我们什么东西都没学到 We're not even learning anything
我知道这对你来说很艰难 斯坦 I know this has all been really hard on you, Stanley
你想聊聊这件事吗？ Do you want to talk about it?
不 我很好 妈妈 你知道 我很坚强的 No. I'm fine, Mom. You know, I'm strong
我只是担心这一切会影响到 I'm just worried about how this all affecting
那些比较脆弱的孩子 比如…你知道的 比如巴特斯 Weaker kids like...you know, like Butters
是啊 很高兴知道你很关心自己的朋友 Yeah. Well, it's nice you care about your friend
但是如果你需要和人聊聊 But if you need to talk...
我知道这对每个人来说都是困难时期 I know this is really hard on everyone
然而 到此为止了 伙计们 Well, that's it, guys
我们今天的大麻都卖完了 We have run out of weed for the day
喔 等等 不好意思 啊 是不是有人说过 Oh, hang on. Sorry. Uh, didn't somebody say
疫情特售是个坏主意？ The Pandemic Special was a bad idea?
我不是说你赚不到钱 I wasn't saying you wouldn't make money
我说的是 这应该不是现在重点关注的事情 I was saying maybe that's not what should matter right now
噢 得了吧 想想看 Oh, come on. Think about it
你认识有人因为新冠就要死了吗？ Do you even know anyone personally who's dying of COVID?
有！我的哥哥金博 他就在医院里呢！ Yes! My brother Jimbo, who is in the hospital!
是啊 金博叔叔 Yeah. Uncle Jimbo
金博是个酗酒的死肥佬 他进医院也是迟早的事 Jimbo's a fat alcoholic who'd be in the hospital anyway
我说的是我们不能让 All I'm saying is that we can't let
来自“中国”的肮脏病毒 Some dirty virus from "China"
毁了我们的生活 让我们关门大吉！ Completely upend our lives and shut us down!
别在孩子面前复述总统说过的话！ Please do not quote the President in front of our child!
※指特朗普总统对中国有关新冠病毒的指控
莎伦 我去过中国 记得吗？在上一季里面？ Sharon, I went to China. Remember? Last season?
我去那儿卖大麻 并且我最后勾搭上了 I went there to sell our weed, and I ended up hanging out
迪士尼和米老鼠 你记得吗？ With Disney and Mickey Mouse. You remember all that?
我知道中国是什么样 I know what China's like
这些破事来自那里 我一点儿也不奇怪 Doesn't surprise me all this shit came from there
我们要回学校了！什么？ We're going back to school! What?
他们要让我们返校了！ They're gonna let us go back to school!
帕克县校区明天要举行全体家长会议 The Park County School District is holding an all-parent meeting tomorrow
官方有望让学生们能在周一回到学校 And officials are hopeful That students can return to school on Monday
噢 太棒了！ Oh, that's great!
喔 我不知道这是不是一个好主意 Oh, I don't know if this is a good idea
接下来的新闻是 The openings come on the heels of news
科学家们在发现新冠疫情 That scientists are getting closer to finding the origins
的起源上有了新进展 Of the COVID pandemic
是 是的 我们得以追踪病毒 Y-Yes, we've been able to trace the virus
并确认它实际上的确来自 And confirm that it did, in fact, come from
中国的一个脏乱差角落 A seedy part of China
哈！我就说嘛！ Ha! Told ya!
而且实际上 我们定位到这病毒 And, in fact, we've pinpointed the virus
来自武汉特定的一只蝙蝠 To a certain bat in Wuhan
武汉的一只蝙蝠？ A bat in Wuhan?
我们还没有弄明白的是 What we still don't understand is
这种传染病是怎么从蝙蝠传染到人身上的？ How did a transmitted disease get from a bat to a human?
病毒是怎样跨物种传播的？ How can a virus jump species like that?
我们就是没能弄明白 We just don't know
你好 Hello
噢！噢 嘿嘿！ Oh! Oh, hey!
你需要节草啊 中国！ You could use some tegridy, China!
-来点这个 致敬中国！哈哈！ -致中国！ -Here's to China! Ha ha! -To China!
伙计 你真的是个派对老手 米奇！ Boy, you sure know how to party, Mick!
噢 上帝啊！看看她！哈哈！ Oh, my God! Look at her! Ha ha!
她可真性感！ She is so hot!
我想那是一只蝙蝠吧 I think that's a bat
是啊！是一只蝙蝠！ Yeah! It's a bat!
是一只长着翅膀的老鼠啊！ It's a mouse with wings!
嘿 米奇？你去哪了？ Hey, Mick? Where'd ya go?
哈哈！哈哈！噢 哦哟喂！ Ha ha! Ha ha! Ooh, boy!
哦哦哦！ 哈哈哈！ -Ohh! -Ha ha!
兰迪 你也得试试！来啊 搞一发 Randy, you gotta try it! Go ahead. Take a turn
噢噢噢噢噢噢噢噢噢噢！ Ohh-oh-oh-oh!
喔喔喔喔喔喔！ Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh!
如果他们让我们返校 If they're letting us go back to school
那很快一切也都会恢复了 Then soon we can get back to everything
我想 难道那不意味着事情终于 I mean, doesn't this mean things are finally
要回归正常了嘛？爸？ Going back to normal? Dad?
我得走了！ I gotta go!
那就他妈的把未来世界卖了！ Then sell fucking Epcot Center!
※迪士尼的高科技馆 位于奥兰多
如果我们不能让人坐上那些游乐设施 If we can't get people on the rides
那就该把那些该死玩意卖了！ Then sell the fucking thing!
不 不 不！我说多拍点《曼达洛人》！ No, no, no! I said more "Mandalorian"!
※2019年迪士尼发行的《星球大战》首部真人剧集
上帝啊！我们要倒闭了！ Jesus Christ! We're fucking dying here!
什么？是他妈的谁？哈哈 What? Fucking what? Ha ha
嘿 我是兰迪·马什 来自 来自节草农场？ Hey. It's Randy Marsh. From...From Tegridy Farms?
你要什么 马什？我这已经忙成一团乱麻了！ What do you want, Marsh? I'm in the fucking weeds here!
听着 嗯…你还记得 Look. Um... Do you remember
我们在武汉上了那只蝙蝠的事吗？ When we fucked that bat in Wuhan?
我上过的蝙蝠多了！ I've fucked a lot of bats!
好吧 但我只上过一只！ Well, I've only fucked one!
我记得 就在那之后 我感觉很不舒服 I remember...right after, I got really sick
那都是十月份的事情了 And this was all back in October
上帝啊 你个混蛋！这一切都是因为你！ Jesus Christ, you fucker! You started all this!
是你让我去上那只蝙蝠的！ You told me to fuck the bat!
你回家之后没在家自我隔离吗？ You didn't quarantine yourself after you got home?
我上那只蝙蝠的时候也没新冠这回事啊！ Nobody knew anything about COVID when I fucked the bat!
我以为我从中国回来的时候只是得了流感了！ I thought I just came back from China with the flu!
听着 我们不能让科学家们找到那只蝙蝠 Look. We can't let scientists find that bat
我老婆是个疯婆子 My wife is crazy
要是她发现疫情是因我而起 If she finds out I started the pandemic
她可就要婊死我了 She's gonna be a total bitch about it
伙计 你不会相信的 Dude, you are not gonna believe this
你在这干嘛？ What are you doing here?
你爸爸在家吗 凯尔？我们得和律师谈谈 Is your dad home, Kyle? We need to talk to a lawyer
布罗夫洛夫斯基先生？ Mr. Broflovski?
老兄 从我家滚出去！ Dude, get outta my house!
如果你想聊聊 我们可以去外面聊！ If you wanna talk, we can go outside!
他们要让我们返校了 They're gonna try and make us go back to school
老兄 你没准就在传播病菌！ Dude, you could be spreading germs!
也许你没听清我说的 凯尔 Maybe you didn't hear me, Kyle
他们想要我们返校！ They want us to go back to school!
-所以呢？ -所以呢？你他妈在搞什么？ -So? -"So?" What the fuck...
你真的想回到那奴隶营里去？ You really wanna go back to that slavery?
我想好好接受教育！ I want an education!
我想在成年之后能够胜任一份工作 I want to be able to compete for a job when I'm older
你这个疯子 精神病… You crazy, psychotic....
凯尔 我们需要一名律师 Kyle, we need to get a lawyer
来阻止学校强迫我们返校 To stop the schools from forcing us back
现在 不管你那想要返校的想法 Now, whatever your messed-up beliefs are
有多么莫名其妙 About wanting to go to school...
你真的想要接下来一整年都用Zoom上网课吗？ You really wanna spend the next year on Zoom?
你不一定非得Zoom在线啊 You don't have to be on Zoom
有无数的方法可以做手脚呢！ There's a million ways around it!
记住我的话 凯尔 首先 他们会强迫我们返校 Mark my words, Kyle. First, they'll force us back to school
然后他们便不再让我们保持社交距离了 Then they'll take social distancing away from us completely
然后我就得离开自己的房间出来和你鬼混了！ And I'll be out of my room having to hang out with you!
你现在就没在自己的房间和我一起啊 You're out of your room hanging out with me now
噢 我的天啊 他们全都得兜着走 Oh, my God. They won't get away with this!
嘿！打扰一下！ Hey! Excuse me!
你就是兰迪·马什对吧？ Y-You're Randy Marsh, right?
额…是吧 Uh...m-maybe
伙计 听着 我想好好谢谢你 你知道吗？ Yeah. Look, man. I just wanna say thanks. You know?
疫情特售实在是太棒了 The Pandemic Special is really amazing
哦 行吧 挺好的 谢谢你 Oh, yeah. Cool. Thank you
别走 你听我说 你…你真的很不错 No, no, listen. You...You're awesome
现在发生了这么多破事 而且… All this horrible stuff going on, and...
呃 只有你站出来和它对抗！ Well, you come along and try to fight it!
好吧 谢了 Okay. Thanks
你 你看 我… Y-You see, I...
因为病毒 我妻子没了 I lost my wife. To the virus
我的孩子们 我…我甚至不知道该怎么告诉他们 My kids, I...I don't even know how to talk to them
你明白吗？就是… You know? Just...
幸亏有你的疫情特售 Just thank God for your Pandemic Special
感谢上帝 Thank God
这真的是个很棒的特售 它真的是 It's a great special. It really is
-行吧 -不 这简直是个超赞的特售！ -Okay. -No, it's an awesome special
做特售这个点子实在是太棒了 A-And it was a great idea to do a special
够了 够了！你别说了！ Okay, okay! Just stop!
好么 欢迎各位家长参加这次视频会议 M'kay, welcome, parents, to this all-school town meeting
来讨论一下如何让孩子们 To talk about how we're gonna get your kids
回到教室里上课 Back into the classroom
大家能听到我说话么？ Can everyone hear me m'kay?
好么 我们已经做出 M'kay, well, parents, we've made
一些非常棒的调整和人事安排了 好么 Some amazing adjustments and hirings, m'kay
我们相信孩子们星期一就能回来上课了 好么？ We believe we can welcome students back on Monday. M'kay?
你们准备怎么处理呢？ How are you going to do this?
对啊 我儿子怎么能和克雷格·塔克坐同个教室里？ Yeah, what happens when my son is sitting in a room with Craig Tucker
他爸出门了连口罩都不戴 Whose father doesn't even wear a mask outside?
噢 你他妈又来了！别拿口罩的事情说我了 斯多奇！ Oh, here we fucking go again! Stop mask shaming, Stotch!
如果你把口罩戴在下巴下面 Well, it's really not a mask if you wear it
那真不是个口罩 那就是个下巴尿布 Down around your chin. That's a chin diaper
没有实质性证据证明口罩 There's no real proof that a mask
到底他妈的有没有用！ Even fucking does anything!
这话说的太像个乡巴佬了！ Spoken like a true redneck!
噢 我可去你妈的吧！ Oh, fuck you!
好了 好了 大家安静一下！ M'kay, m'kay, everyone! Alright!
这不公平！ That's not fair!
够了！ M'kay!
我把所有人都禁言了！好么？ I just muted everybody! M'kay?
如果大家不能好好谈 Now, if we don't get along
我就坐在这儿把你们都给禁言了 I'll just sit here with you all on mute
好么 现在我们再来一遍 M'kay. Now, let's try this again
我看到温蒂的妈妈在 I saw Wendy's mother not wearing a mask
罗斯百货的更衣室里没带口罩 In the changing room at Ross
你他妈干什么 The fuck are you doing
在更衣室里监视我？ Spying on me in the changing room?
我也在罗斯百货！ -I was at Ross! -
好么 嘣！你们都被禁言了！ M'kay! Boom! You're all muted!
好么？我可以和你们耗一整天！ M'kay? I can do this all day!
现在学校已经做出了改进 Now, we've made changes at the school
我们觉得已经做好让孩子们回来上课的准备了 And we feel prepared to welcome your students back
多诺万先生 Mr. Donovan
我不关心你们做了什么改进 I don't care what changes you've made
但我儿子克莱德不会去学校！ My son Clyde is not going to class!
这是你自己的权力 禁言了！ And that is your prerogative. Mute!
你说 马什太太 M'kay. Mrs. Marsh
我觉得老师们都没回学校才是问题所在 I thought that the issue was the teachers not coming back
说得没错 That is correct
老师们认为回学校还不安全 Our teaching staff does not feel safe to return
但是…我们已经聘请了新老师 好么 But....we have hired all new teachers. M'kay
他们因为最近的事件丢了工作 These are people who have recently lost their jobs
而且非常渴望得到新工作 Due to recent events and are desperate for work
所以他们什么活都肯干 M'kay. So they'll do just about anything
什么新老师？ What new teachers?
好 伙计们！ Alright, men!
※指乔治·弗洛伊德事件后 部分地方政府停止资助警方
大伙都知道 由于最近的事情完全失控 As you all know, due to recent events totally beyond our control
我们大部分资金都没了 We have lost most of our funding
但这次的新工作肯定会很棒 But this new venture will be great
据我所知 我们都会出任小学老师 And I know we will all thrive as elementary schoolteachers
这可能是我们最后的工作机会了 This might be our last chance at a job
所以我不希望出现意外伤亡 So I don't want any unnecessary deaths
噢！噢！拒绝意外伤亡！ Ahp! Ahp! No unnecessary deaths!
让我们向小镇展示 我们是多棒的领导者 And let's show this town just what great leaders we can be
这会很棒的 This is gonna be great
今早 整个南方公园的 All over South Park this morning
孩子们都在为返校首日而做准备 Children are getting ready for their first day of class
而此时 科学家们声称 And as they do, scientists say
他们已经接近研发出疫苗了 They're closer to finding a vaccine
噢 酷！调大点声！ Oh, cool! Turn it up!
汤姆 我现在在这所新建的 Reporter: Tom, I'm standing in front of the newly built
病毒研究中心前 这里的科学家们声称他们已经找到 Viral research center where scientists say they have found
引发新冠病毒的动物了 The animal which started the coronavirus
这个动物来自中国 The creature was located in China
现在已经被关进了这里 And then flown to the facility here
科学家们正在进行系统的研究 Where scientists are studying it thoroughly
嘿 嘿 嘿！什么！你们在看什么！ Hey, hey, hey! W-Whoa! W-What are you guys doing?
他们说快要找到疫苗了 They think they're about to find a vaccine
对 我们现在已经抓到了那个动物 Yes, now that we have the animal in our possession
我们终于可以知道是什么东西导致病毒 We'll finally be able to unlock what caused a virus
传染到人身上来了 To jump from it to humans
什么东西引发了新冠病毒重要吗？ Does it matter what started coronavirus?
谁关心这个啊？ Who cares what started coronavirus?
你们这是在歧视！ You guys are being racist!
我们不需要看这种东西！遥控器在哪儿？ We don't need to watch this! Where's the remote?
这是…这是歧视性的节目 This is... This is racist television
我他妈不想看这个！ And we're not gonna watch it!
-我想听这条新闻 兰迪！ -不！ -I want to hear this, Randy! -No!
知道吗？你们实在是太可怕了 No. You know what? You guys are horrible!
快…快给我停下来！ Just... Just stop it right now!
你们追踪病毒去了武汉 You traced the virus to Wuhan
但发现源头并不是蝙蝠 是这样吗？ But what you found was not a bat. Is that correct?
没错 病毒并不是从蝙蝠开始传播的 No, no, the virus did not come from a bat
你们…什么？他说什么了？ You guys...What? What'd he say?
我们成功突破了病毒的研究 We were able to break down the virus enough
发现和蝙蝠没有半点关系 To see there was actually no bat involved
和蝙蝠没关系 和蝙蝠没关系！ No bat involved. No bat involved!
*噢耶 噢耶* Oh, yeah, oh, yeah
*不是蝙蝠 不是蝙蝠！* It wasn't a bat, it wasn't a bat
*不是蝙蝠 看到了吧！* It wasn't a bat, in your face!
*看到了吧 不是蝙蝠！* In your face, it wasn't a bat
当我们追踪病毒时 我们发现它确实是 When we tracked the virus, we found it did originate
发源于武汉 但实际是来自于一种鳞甲目生物 In Wuhan, but from a species called pholidota
那这种鳞甲目生物到底是什么？ And what exactly is pholidota?
是一只穿山甲 而它现在就在这儿 It's a pangolin. And here it is right over here
-妈 什么是穿山甲？ -我也不知道 -What's a pangolin, Mom? -I'm not even sure
你知道穿山甲是什么吗 兰迪？ Do you know what a pangolin is, Randy?
兰迪？ Randy?
你知道穿山甲是什么吗 爸爸？ Do you know what a pangolin is, Dad?
哈哈！哈哈！ Ha ha! Ha ha!
我还是不敢相信你操了那只蝙蝠 老兄 Dude, I still can't believe you fucked that bat
哈哈！ Ha ha!
-好了 好了 嘘！ -哈哈！ -Okay, okay. Shh! -Ha ha!
你真的让她嗨上天了！噢 我的天！ You really let her have it! Oh, boy!
够了！我现在不想回想那个 米奇 Okay! I don't wanna think about that right now, Mickey
我只是被震撼到了 就这样 I'm just impressed, that's all
我是说 如果你连蝙蝠都能搞定 那… I mean, if you can handle a bat, then...
那什么？ Then what?
你操过穿山甲吗？ You ever have sex with a pangolin?
穿山甲是他妈个什么东西？ What the fuck is a pangolin?
哈哈！哇哦！吼吼！ Ha ha! Ha whoa! Ho ho!
哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈哈！ Ha ha ha ha! Ha ha ha ha ha!
我操！ Shit!
好了 孩子们 欢迎回到课堂 Alright, children, welcome back to class
我是你们的新老师 哈里斯警探 I'm your new teacher, Detective Harris
这是你们的助教 And this is our homeroom teacher's assistant
约翰逊警官 Officer Johnston
我们今天先来学些数学 Let's start the day off with some math
有人会数学吗？ Does anyone understand math?
谁愿意带头教同学们数学？ Who would like to lead the class with some math?
疫情！有疫情！你们不能逼我去上学！ Pandemic! There's a pandemic! You can't make me go to school!
你们不能…啊！啊！不 不 不！ You can't...Arghh! Aaaghh! No, no, no!
哦 不 不！你们不能逼我！ Oh, no, no! You can't make me!
我不知道我能不能做到 米奇 I don't know if I can do this, Mitch
我他妈讨厌小孩 我当不了老师 I fucking hate kids. I can't be a teacher
我们只能干这个了 长官 我来试试吧 It's all we got, sir. Let me try
孩子们！好了！快点！安静下来！ Kids! Alright! Come on! Let's settle down!
现在我们来画一些手指画吧 听到了吗？ Now we're gonna do some fingerpaints. You got that?
你们用手指画一些… You're gonna fingerpaint...
“你所选的有袋动物或是夏天做过的趣事” "a marsupial of your choice or a fun thing you did over the summer."
你们不能让我们待在这儿！ You can't make us stay here!
这侵犯了我们的自由！你们谁赞同我说的？ This is a violation of our freedom! Who's with me, guys?
好了 听着！我们现在要开始画手指画了！ Now, listen! We're gonna start fingerpaintin' right now!
哦 我的天呐！我都忘了跟大家在一起感觉如此糟糕！ Oh, my God! I forgot how much it sucks to be around everybody!
我觉得我要发病了！凯尔我病你一脸！ I think I'm gonna be sick! All over Kyle!
去死吧！ Fuck you!
够了！ That's enough!
搞定！ Got him!
这就是那个动物了 And here it is
这是我们在中国抓到的穿山甲 This is the pangolin we tracked down in China
我们也许能通过它制出疫苗 The animal that could lead us to a vaccine
新冠的谜团可能会通过我们对这个生物的研究 The mysteries of COVID can be unlocked
而就此解开 By our studies of this creature
我想让你们都和它保持距离 I'll just ask you all to keep a good distance away
显然我们不能让这只穿山甲出任何事 Obviously we can't let anything happen to this pangolin
你们看 这只穿山甲的DNA已经变异了 You see, this pangolin's DNA has mutated
我们认为这就是疫情的源头 Which is what we believe started it all
这只穿山甲是如何变异的？ The pangolin has mutated how?
我们不能完全确定 We're not completely sure
但我们现在可以确信 有东西通过一些手段… But we believe now that something somehow...
把自己的DNA注入了这只穿山甲体内 Got its DNA up into the pangolin
这具体是怎么发生的呢？ How exactly could that happen?
嗯 这 就像是另一个生物 Well, i-it's almost like another creature
不知怎么的就把自己的DNA注入了穿山甲体内 Somehow inserted its DNA up into the pangolin
也许是一些其他的物种 Perhaps some other species
不知怎么就和穿山甲交媾了？ Somehow mated with the pangolin?
哦 得了吧！什么动物 Oh, come on! What kind of animal
会和穿山甲做爱啊？ Would have sex with a pangolin?
对啊！看看那玩意多丑！ Yeah! Look how ugly that thing is!
对啊 对啊！ - -Yeah. Yeah!
好了 好了 Okay. Okay
再说一遍 重要的是 我们需要解码 Again, what really matters is that we decode
注入穿山甲体内的外源DNA The foreign DNA inside the pangolin
这可能是疫苗的关键 甚至可能是解药 That would be the key to a vaccine, perhaps even a cure
我们需要知道什么东西强暴了这只穿山甲 We have to know what raped the pangolin
哦 所以现在又说“强暴”了 Oh. So now it was "rape."
不好意思 先生 你是谁？ Excuse me, sir. Who are you?
这次观展是为传染病学专业的科学家准备的 This tour is for scientists that specialize in pandemics
你…你是疫情方面的专家吗？ Are you.... a pandemic specialist?
对啊 我是疫情专家 我现在就在做疫情特售呢 Yeah, I'm a pandemic specialist. I'm making one right now
哦…好吧 不管怎样 现在大家都跟我去微生物实验室吧 O-kay. Anyway, if you all follow me now to the micro labs
我给你们展示一下 I can show you the containment system
疫苗进入试验期时的围护机制 For once a vaccine is able to be tried
好么 好么 家长们？ M'kay. M'kay, parents?
大家都能听到我么？ Can everyone hear me m'kay?
大家听着 Everyone listen up.
我们不想引发公众恐慌 好么 We don't want anyone to panic, m'kay
但我们校内出现了一例新冠病例 But there has been a COVID exposure here at the school
好么 有一位四年级生 M'kay. One of our fourth graders
几小时前被送往医院了 好么？ Was taken to the hospital a couple hours ago, m'kay?
但是我们…我们觉得托肯会好起来的 But we... we think Token's gonna be okay
现在 根据县法规 每个在学校里的人 Now, due to county protocol, everyone that was in the school
都要隔离两周 Now has to quarantine for two weeks
所以我们要把你们的孩子们留在这儿 So we will be keeping your kids here
老师们会和他们待在一起的 And the teachers will be staying with them
好了 学生们 安静 Alright, students, shut up
我知道你们不想遭遇这种情况 I know this situation is not ideal
但我们得一起隔离两周 But we all have to quarantine together for two weeks
这他妈太扯淡了！ This is bullshit!
你不想传染给你的家人 对吧？ You don't want to infect your families, do you?
你们都和这儿的一个 You were all exposed to a student here
由于新冠被送进医院的学生接触过 Who was taken to the hospital due to COVID
什么事？ Yes?
呃 我们当时在现场 托肯其实是 Uh, we were there, and Token was actually
因为你们枪击了才被送进医院的 Taken to the hospital because you guys shot him
是的 还是因为新冠 Yes, due to COVID
如果不是因为新冠 之前所有的老师 If it weren't for COVID, all the previous teachers
都还会在这里 Would have still been here
我们就不会出现在你们的课堂上 We wouldn't have been in the class
这样就没人会被枪击了 And nobody would have gotten shot
因此这个年轻人是因为新冠才在医院的 Therefore the young man is in the hospital due to COVID
这就叫“新冠相关” It was COVID-related
这简直狗屁不通！ That doesn't make any sense!
科学家们要求南方公园的所有居民 And scientists are asking all South Park County residents
留心一下这种生物 To keep an eye out for the creature
再说一遍 那只穿山甲昨天从研究机构中逃出 Once again, the pangolin escaped from the facility yesterday
许多人忧心忡忡 And many people are fearing the worst
科学家们称尽管 Scientists say that even though
他们已经有了穿山甲的样本 They have samples from the pangolin
但如今仍旧未获得研制疫苗所需的东西 They now don't have what they need for a vaccine
是的 我们现在需要的是 Yes, you see, what we needed was the foreign DNA
穿山甲体内的外源DNA That was up inside the pangolin
那个DNA将是我们研制出治愈方法的关键 It's whatever that DNA was that was our key to a cure
你好？有人在家吗？ Hello? Anyone home?
你有个快递 请签收 Got a delivery here. Needs a signature
哦 好的 Oh, okay
哦 嘿-嘿 如果你要靠近的话 Oh, h-hey. If you're gonna come any closer
你可以戴一个 呃 下巴尿布吗？ Would you mind wearing a, you know, chin diaper?
哦 不好意思 Oh. Sorry
请拿好 在这签名 Here you go. Just sign right there
祝你生活愉快 Have a nice day
哦 还有 嘿 我真的很喜欢疫情特售 Oh, and, hey. I'm really loving the Pandemic Special
是吗 谢谢 Yeah, thanks
你为什么给我寄那东西？ Why did you send that to me?
哈哈！因为你是死人一个了 马什！ Ha ha! Because you're a dead man, Marsh!
你的DNA就是研制疫苗所需的东西！哈哈！ It's your DNA that they need for a vaccine! Ha ha!
是的 我知道 但我不能去自首！ Yeah, I know, but I can't just turn myself in!
马什 这无关人情冷暖 不过利来利往 This isn't personal, Marsh. It's business
我要把你杀了 然后偷偷地把你的DNA I'm having you killed, then secretly we'll send your DNA
送到科学家那里去研制疫苗 哈哈 To the scientists for the vaccine. Ha ha
这都是你的错 米老鼠！ This is all your fault, Mickey Mouse!
当你把垃圾《花木兰》兜售给中国的时候 You made the deal with the devil
※2020年上映的迪士尼动画改编真人电影 口碑不佳
你就和魔鬼做了交易！ When you sold your "Mulan" shit to China!
然后你把我也拉上了 向我吹嘘中国有多好 And then you took me out and sold me on how great China was
以及该怎样跪舔他们！ And how we should all suck their dick!
你让我丢失了节操 和一切我曾经拥有的特别之物… You made me lose my tegridy and anything special that I had --
特别 等一下 Special. Wait a minute
就是它了 That's it
是什么？哈哈 What's it? Ha ha
特别之物 疫情特售！ The special. The Pandemic Special!
这样我就能把我的DNA注入别人体内了！ That's how we can get my DNA into people!
我们甚至可以神不知鬼不觉地为他们接种疫苗！ We can vaccinate them without them even knowing!
你在说什么？ What are you talking about?
在你杀我之前先给我几天时间吧 Just give me a couple more days before you have me killed
我 我觉得我找到了解决办法 I-I think I know a way out of this
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兰迪？ Randy?
嘘！嘿 金博 Shh! Hey, Jimbo
你 你在干什么…？ W-What are you...?
放松 金博 我想我可能找到治疗新冠肺炎的方法了 It's okay, Jimbo. I think I might have a cure for COVID
你只需要相信我 好吗？ You're just gonna have to trust me, okay?
呃 Unh
呃啊啊 Ohhhhhhh
嘘 嘘！ -Uh...Uh...-Shh!
马上就会好起来了 -不 呃… This is gonna be great. -No, uh...
好了 好了 现在呼吸 It's okay. It's okay. Just breathe
呼 吸 Br-e-e-e-eathe
没问题的 - -It's okay
会好起来的 呼吸 It's okay. Breathe
※此歌为电影《极度空间》中的插曲《Coming to L.A.》
我们很想你 宝贝！ We miss ya, honey!
我们已经等不及隔离结束了！ We can't wait for quarantine to be over! Heh
四组！你们的用餐时间结束了！ Group 4! Your meal is over!
回到你们班里去！ Back to your class!
好的 五组 现在是用餐时间！ Alright. Group 5, it's now mealtime!
进来吧 但注意保持你们的社交距离！ Come in but keep your social distance!
很好 这种距离就挺好 非常好 Yeah, that's good social distancing. Real good
3月16号！那是3月16号！ March 16th! It was March 16th!
已经那么久了！ That's how long it's been!
本应该有场派对的！ It was supposed to be a party!
在造熊工坊举办一个盛大的 快乐的派对 A big, happy gathering at Build-A-Bear
庆祝我看牙医的时候像个大孩子一样勇敢 To celebrate me being a big boy at the dentist!
然后他们就把造熊工坊关了 Then they shut it all down
他们说我得等到四月份 They said I'd have to wait until April
然后说要等到五月 之后他们又说我得等到夏天！ And then it was May. And then they said wait until summer!
现在已经是他妈的十月了！ It's fucking October now!
为什么没有人告诉我真相？ Why doesn't anyone tell me the truth?
我再也去不了造熊工坊了！ That I'm never going to Build-A-Bear!
再也去不了了！ That I'm never going ever again!
巴特斯 巴特斯 你冷静点 Butters, Butters, you gotta calm down
我再也去不了造熊工坊了 是吧？ I'm never going to Build-A-Bear, am I?
哦 嘿 老师 抱歉 等 等一下 我错了 Oh, hey, Teachers. Sorry. W-Wait. I'm sorry
我不去造熊工坊了！伙计们？ I don't need to go to Build-A-Bear! Fellas?
兰迪 车钥匙在哪？ Randy. Where are the car keys?
兰迪！ Randy!
啊？ 哦…什么？你说什么？ Huh? Uh... What? What?
车钥匙在哪？ Where are the car keys?
可能在我的裤兜里 怎么了？ They're probably in my pants pocket. Why?
我得去医院 I have to get over to the hospital
医院？你去干什么？ The hospital? For what?
是金博 医生说他现在好多了 所以我能带他回家 It's Jimbo. Doctor said he's better, so I can take him home
-金博好多了？ -他们说他现在没有任何症状 - Jimbo's better? - They said he doesn't have
而且他的核酸检测呈阴性 Any symptoms, and his tests are showing negative
天啊 Holy shit
起作用了 它帮上忙了！ It works. It can help!
哦 Unh
哦 我的天 Oh, boy
凯尔 我得和你谈谈 Kyle, I need to talk to you
嘿 老兄 我真的很担心… Hey, dude. I'm really worried..
很担心巴特斯的情况 我觉得他病了 About Butters. I think he's sick
你觉得他感染了病毒？ You think he got the virus?
不！是别的东西 No! It's all the other stuff
是孤立和猜疑 The isolation and the uncertainty
我真的很担心新冠肺炎带来的一些东西 I'm just really worried what all the stuff
会对一些孩子造成影响 Around COVID is doing to some kids
你也知道 不是所有的小孩都像我们一样 You know, not every kid is like us
有些孩子真的没办法再忍受了 There's some kids who really can't take it anymore
我知道 这烂透了 I know. This bullshit sucks
但巴特斯会没事的 But Butters'll be okay
如果他并非如此呢？ And what if he's not?
如果巴特斯真的开始神志不清了呢？ What if Butters is actually starting to lose his mind?
如果他真的觉得自己的身体歇逼了呢？ What if he feels his body shutting down right now?
你真的认为那么糟了吗？ You really think it's that bad?
我们是时候向比学校里的警察们 It's time for us to ask for help
更富有权威的人 From someone who has more authority
求助的时候了 At this school than these cops
总统先生！疾控中心打来电话 Mr. President! The CDC is on the line
他们必须马上和你谈谈！ They need to speak with you urgently!
让他们去舔我的屁眼 Tell them to suck my asshole
总统先生 福奇博士在二号电话线 Mr. President, Dr. Fauci is on line two
食品药品监督管理局局长在三号电话线 And FDA chief is on line three
哦！让福奇去捅他自己的屁眼 Ooh! Tell Fauci to shove it up his ass
然后让食药监局局长明白他得舔光我的蛋 And let the FDA chief know he can eat shit off my balls
阁下！阁下 四号线有一通 Sir! Sir, you have an urgent call on line four
来自奴隶先生的紧急呼电 From a Mr. Slave
奴隶先生？ Mr. Slave?
好吧 快接！接接接！ Okay, go! Go, go, go!
喂？我是美国总统 Yes? This is the President of the entire United States
你好 我是斯坦·马什 Uh, hi. It's Stan Marsh
斯坦·马什？奴隶先生在哪？ Stan Marsh? Where's Mr. Slave?
我很抱歉 我们不得不引起你注意 I'm sorry. We had to get your attention
听着 我们现在被困在学校 Listen, we're being kept at the school
这里有个学生病得很重 And one of the students here is really sick
老天爷啊 又来了 Oh, for Pete's sake, here we go again
你该做啥做啥 我很忙的 Just deal with it. I am busy
不 不行 总统先生 求你了！ No, no, Mr. President, please!
你得回南方公园来 You gotta come back to South Park
我们的老师们在朝人们开枪！ Our teachers are shooting people!
每个人都在争吵 并且这里…在小镇外面 Everyone's arguing, and... and there's a facility
有个搜寻穿山甲和研制疫苗的机构 Outside of town that found the pangolin and are working on a vaccine
你也许能阻止疫情蔓延！ You might be able to stop the pandemic!
为什么我要这么做？ Why would I do that?
哈？ Huh?
斯坦 对于一个孩子来说 Stan, this is gonna be very difficult
这很难理解 For a child to understand
但是我向美国公民做过承诺… But I made a promise to the American people..
要干掉所有的墨西哥人 To get rid of all the Mexicans
但传染病不只会杀死墨西哥人 But the pandemic isn't just killing Mexicans
它会杀掉他们中的很多人 It's killing a lot of them
我仔细检查过数据 斯坦 I've gone over the statistics, Stan
我现在要做的就是把雪崩引向正确的方向 All I have to do now is sort of guide the avalanche in right direction
并且我正在履行对美国公民的承诺 And I'm fulfilling my promises to the American People
直到传染病发生之前 我都收拾烂摊子 I was doing a crap job until this pandemic happened
你就打算坐在那里什么都不做？ You're just going to sit there and not do anything?
我打算积极不采取任何措施 I am going to actively not do anything
你就去舔我的蛋然后去死吧 And you can eat shit off my balls and die
真该死！ God dammit!
来 给你 Okay, there you go
我现在只能卖给你这些了 That's all I can sell you right now
你一定得吸它 知道吗？ Just make sure you smoke it, okay?
尽情享受特售吧 Enjoy the special
等 等一下 各位！ H-Hang on, guys!
我得再准备些 只需要给我四分钟左右就好 I gotta prep some more. Just give me like four minutes
兰迪？ Randy?
噢！兰迪！ Oh! Randy!
怎…怎么了？ Just... what?
兰迪 你赶紧过来！ Randy, you've gotta get in here!
我正在做重要的事 莎伦！ I'm doing something important, Sharon!
人们现在就需要这个！ People need this right now!
快上楼 金博有些不对劲！ Come upstairs. Something's wrong with Jimbo!
他睡了好几天了 He's just been sleeping for days
医生说他正在好转 They said he was getting better
昨天晚上他又发烧了 Last night, his fever came back
然后几小时前他的脸上长了这些东西 And then a few hours ago, this thing appeared on his face
什么东西？ What thing?
金博根本长不出一字胡 Jimbo's never been able to grow a mustache
哈 这可奇了怪了 Huh. That's weird
我应该把医生找来吗？ Should I call the doctor?
不！不 不 不要！不要找医生！ No! No, no, no! Don't call the doctor!
他们正忙着呢 这是前所未有的情况 They're busy. These are unprecedented times
我 我们不知道这是由什么导致的 W-We have no idea what caused this
特售… Special..
什么事 金博？ What, Jimbo?
疫情…呃…特售… Pandemic... uh... Special..
为什么他要提你的特售？ Why's he talking about your special?
每个人都在谈论特售 莎伦 Everyone's talking about the special, Sharon
这很重要 很明显他现在需要这个 It's a big deal. He obviously needs it right now
我去拿温度计 I'm gonna get the thermometer
快他妈把嘴闭上！ Just fucking shut up!
你又不知道是不是因为特售！ You have no idea if it's because of the special!
你很可能会再次染病 You could just be sick again
因为你他妈就是个嗜酒如命的死肥子 'Cause you're a fat fucking alcoholic
我才不要因为你进监狱！ And I am not going to jail for you!
你说你之前从没长过一字胡？ And you say you've never had a mustache before?
没！从来没有过！ No! Never!
它突然就凭空长出来了！ It just came outta nowhere!
怎么会发生这种事 医生？ How can this happen, doctor?
最近你有摄取任何有毒物质进入体内吗？ Have you put anything toxic in your body lately?
任何毒品或者酒精？ Any drugs or alcohol?
没有！我的意思是… No! I mean..
我只是尝了一点点疫情特售… I've enjoyed a little of the Pandemic Special..
噢 不不不 那没有任何问题 Oh, no, no no. That... That's totally fine
医生！ Doctor!
你最好赶紧来趟急诊室！ You better come to the emergency room!
我的天啊 Holy shit
究竟是出现了另一种新冠病毒 Another strain of COVID
还是只是新的和新冠有关的症状？ Or simply more COVID-related symptoms?
据报道 帕克县有十分之一的人长出了一字胡 A reported one in 10 people in Park County
并且似乎没人知道这是为什么 Are experiencing mustaches and nobody seems to know why
市长向传染病专家寻求了帮助 The mayor has called for help from infectious disease experts
安东尼·福奇博士今日抵达南方公园医院 And Dr. Anthony Fauci arrived
※美国顶级传染病专家 应对新冠病毒特别小组成员之一
并给出了他的专业意见 At South Park Hospital today to give his advice
我们并不清楚为什么有些人长出了一字胡而有些人没有 We aren't sure why some people are getting a mustache
但我们必须要竭尽所能 And some aren't, but we have to do all we can
来防止其大规模流行 To avoid it becoming fashionable
我们的下巴尿布能保障我们的安全吗？ Will our chin diapers keep us safe?
可以 但我们必须把它们戴在会长出一字胡的地方 Yes, but we must wear them where the mustache would be
我们需要用它们遮住我们的口鼻 We need to wear them over our mouth and nose
你脑子出问题了吧？ Are you out of your mind?
你想让人们在鼻子上穿尿布？ You expect people to wear a diaper over their nose?
那可真恶心 去你妈的吧 福奇！ That's disgusting. Fuck you, Fauci!
市民们被要求待在家中 Citizens are asked to stay indoors
并试着放松身心 And just try and relax
而且也许可以享受更多疫情特售大麻 And maybe enjoy some of the Pandemic Special
不要！操！ No! Shit!
爽 Nice
巴特斯…？巴特斯？ Butters...? Butters?
-什么？ -别担心 Wha? Don't worry
我会救你的！ I'm going to save you!
好 把我从什么救出来中？ Okay. Save me from what?
大伙！大伙！ Guys! Guys!
什么？谁呀？ What? Who is it?
大家 我们必须把巴特斯从这里救出去 You guys, we have to get Butters out of here
我们还能联系到谁呢 斯坦？ Who else can we call, Stan?
不是 我们必须把他从这里救出去 就现在 No. We have to get him out of here, now
我们需要带他去造熊工坊 We need to take him to Build-A-Bear
你疯了吧？ Are you nuts?
他需要出去做些正常的事！ He has to go out and do something normal!
斯坦 现在造熊工坊只有靠预约才能进去 Stan, Build-A-Bear is currently by appointment only
并且一次最多只能容纳四个人 And a only maximum party of four can visit at one time
我们不能干坐着 We can't sit around and wait for people
等着别人来搞清楚状况 知道吗？ To figure things out, okay?
这是不可能发生的 It's not gonna happen
他们只会继续剥夺他的一切 They just keep taking everything from him
然后说这是为了他好 And saying it's for his own good
但谁说他不能出去 然后他妈享受一点点乐趣呢？ But who's to say he can't go out and have a little goddamn fun?
如果我们想要让一切回归正常 If we want things to go back to normal
那么我们就必须得做点什么！ Then we just gotta go do it!
斯坦说得对 Stan's right. If we want things
如果我们想让一切回归正常 我们必须得靠自己 To go back to normal, we have to do it ourselves
他们只会设置更多限制 They're just gonna keep making more restrictions
以及更多的规则 And more rules, and who's gonna fight
所以谁愿意来为一切回归原样而做出争斗？ To go back to the way things were?
我肯定加入！ I sure as hell will!
我们能为了巴特斯让一切事变得再次正常起来 We can make things normal for Butters again
以及照常上课！ And make school the way it was
照常上课！在我们自己的房间里上网课！ The way it was! Online, in our own rooms!
等等 什么？ Wait. What?
不 我是说在教室里 和真正的老师一起！ No, in a class, with real teachers!
等一下 你在说什么？你说的照常是指什么？ Wait. What? What normal are you talking about?
我说的照常是指 回到像三月份那样的状态 I'm talking about normal, like back in March
你说的照常又是指什么？ What normal are you talking about?
我说的是像三天前那样 I'm talking about normal like three days ago
那时一切都棒极了 When everything was awesome
听着 这不重要 Look, it doesn't matter
我们他妈只需要离开这里 We just gotta break the fuck outta here
提米！ Timmy!
新一轮疫情在南方公园迅速扩散 The new outbreak in South Park is spreading rapidly
由于通往城镇的高速公路关闭 And as highways into town close
政府在考虑进行全面封锁 And governments consider a full lockdown
大家都在想同一个问题 One question is on everyone's mind
那只该死的穿山甲到底在哪？ Where is the damn pangolin?
一些人猜测穿山甲已经自寻死路了 Some speculate the pangolin took its own life
而另一些人认为…稍等 While others think tha... Sorry
抱歉 我们现在接到最新消息！ Sorry, we're getting some breaking news!
哦 天呐 Oh, God
南方公园小学的学生们 Students at South Park Elementary School
逃出了隔离区 正在外面游荡！ Have broken quarantine and are now out on the loose!
这些小孩是昨晚某个时候跑掉的 The fugitives broke out sometime last night
老师们反映 现在没有理由高度警惕 Teachers are reporting there's no cause for alarm
只是这些孩子们都暴露了在满是新冠的环境中 Except that these children have all been exposed to COVID
他们四处流窜并传播着一字胡病毒 And could Be running around spreading mustaches right now!
超级传播者！ Super spreaders!
一家只能买一罐剃须膏！ One can of shaving cream per family!
巴特斯？ Butters?
巴特斯 你赶紧回到隔离区 Butters, you get back to quarantine
要不然你就要被禁足了！ Or you are gonna be grounded!
嘿 斯多奇！ Hey, Stotch!
你听到科学家说什么了吗！ You heard what the scientist said!
把你的尿布往上戴 遮住你的胡子！ Get your diaper up over your mustache area!
我才不要在我的鼻子上糊上该死的尿布！ I'm not wearing a damn diaper over my nose!
你不为别人考虑吗？ Don't you care about people?
是啊 我们考虑的方面可比你想的多了去了 贱人！ Yeah, we care way more about what's right than you do, bitch!
天呐…整个城镇都陷入了混乱中！ For Christ's sake...the entire town is in chaos!
你们怎么能让那些孩子突破隔离？ How the hell did you let those kids out of quarantine?
不要啥都怪在我们老师身上！ Don't blame this on us teachers!
你是开放了学校 但给我们的物资根本不够用 You opened the school and gave us barely enough resources
就让我们匆忙上岗！ To do our job!
每个人都很害怕从 Everyone is terrified of catching something
超级传播者那里染上什么疾病 From these super spreaders!
嗯 我不知道你要做什么 市长 Well, I don't know what you're gonna do, Mayor
你把我们的经费都裁了 You took all our funding away
你说我们的配置太夸张了 You said our equipment was too extreme
那么现在 如果我们能有一些那些装备… Now, if we had some of that stuff back...
对 对 对 对！嘘 嘘 嘘！ Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah! Tsst-tst-tst!
我们当然不想让你们在没可用物资 We certainly don't want you teachers
的情况下担任教师 To be without every resource available
我会写一份政令让你们 I'll write an executive order to get you
得到你们需要的所有东西 Everything you need
※此歌为Mötley Crüe的《Kickstart My Heart》
伙计们…我们可以回去工作了！ Boys... we are back in business!
耶！耶！耶！耶！ Yeah!Yeah! Yeah!Yeah!
4点钟方向有疑似暴露在新冠中的人！ Possible COVID exposure at four o'clock!
嘿！听着！ You there!
你涉嫌违反了安全隔离令！ You are violating a mandated safer-inside order!
放下雪球 回到隔离区！ Put down the snowball and get back to quarantine!
我们逮到了个逃跑的！ We've got a runner!
好了 安全了 Okay, all clear
快点 走 走 走！ Come on. Go, go, go!
好了 你都准备好去找乐子了吗 巴特斯？ All right, you ready to have some fun, Butters?
我肯定准备好了 伙计们！好啊！ I sure am, fellas! Okay!
操 操 撤退！撤 撤 撤 撤！ Shit, shit, get back! Back, back, back, back!
好了 没事了 出来吧 Okay, all good. Come on
伙计们 我们成功了！ Dude, we made it!
巴特斯 巴特斯 快看！ Butters, Butters...look!
哇哦！ Whoa!
这是真的吗？ Is it really for reals?
是啊 是真的 来吧！ Yeah, it's real. Come on!
我们预约好了 We got an appointment!
哦 嘿 你好 我们有个预约 Oh. Hey, excuse me. We have an appointment
哦 不 抱歉 我们关门了 Oh, no, sorry. We're closed
但我打过电话 But I called
你说你们今天开门接受预约 You said you were open today for appointments!
是这样 但我们现在又得关门了 Yeah, we had to shut down again!
有个长胡子的人到过店里 Somebody came into the store with a mustache
有胡子的人？ A mustache?
求你了 我的朋友必须要造一只熊 Please, my friend has to build a bear
我很抱歉！这没有先例可循！ I'm sorry! These are unprecedented times!
拜托 我们只需要一分钟！ Oh, just give us one minute!
哦 干得好啊 斯坦！ Oh, good job, Stan!
谢谢你让我燃起了希望 你个混蛋！ Thanks for getting my hopes up, you asshole!
走吧 伙计 我们最好在被发现前离开这里 Come on, dude, we better get outta here before we're spotted
-我们不能走 -你什么意思？ -We can't go. -What do you mean?
我们没有选择 我们必须要闯进去 We don't have a choice. We're gonna have to break in
接着干什么？ And then do what?
接着给他造一只小熊！ And then build him a bear!
在没有任何工作人员协助的情况下？ Without any employees?
什么 你觉得我们能…造一只自己的小熊？ What, do you expect us to just...build our own bear?
如果我们不得不这么做 就是这样 If we have to, yes
伙计 你需要让工作人员帮你填充和封缝 Dude, you need people to help you do the stuffing and the closing
你…你实际根本不知道怎么去造一只自己的小熊- You don't...You don't actually build your own bear--
我不管！我不会再听这些规矩了 I don't care! I'm not following the rules anymore
你他妈在干什么？ What the hell are you doing?
我只是在把疫情特售的东西 I just gotta take all the Pandemic Special
载到汤普森湖然后扔了它们 Over to Thompson Lake and dump it
扔了？ Dump it?
你现在为什么要担心这个？ Why are you worrying about this right now?
因为疫情特售需要结束了 Because the Pandemic Special needs to end
特售必须要结束 莎伦 A special has to end, Sharon
否则它就不能被称作“特售”了 对吧？ Or else it's not really a "special," is it?
妈的 兰迪 我们的儿子还处在这场混乱中呢！ God dammit, Randy, our son is out in this chaos!
现在不是让你去处理 This is not the time for you to be dealing with
你那些狗屁大麻的时候！ Your fucking marijuana!
必须要有人找到他！ Somebody's gotta find him!
不 不！好！好 好 等一下 我来了！ No, no! Okay! Okay, okay, hold on, I'm coming!
也许我们可以在路上阻止这场特售 Maybe we can just stop the special by the lake on the way
操你妈的！ Fuck you!
我们到了 巴特斯！看啊 你做到了！ Here we are, Butters! Look...you made it!
哦 伙计们！这是梦吗？ Oh, boy! Is this a dream?
不 这不是梦！ No, it's not a dream!
我们真的在这里 而且我们即将要给你造一只熊！ We are really here, and we are gonna build you a bear!
你想要哪种？熊猫可以吗？ Which one you want? You want the panda?
你想要个野马队考拉吗？ You want the Bronco koala?
绅士棕熊 The Cabellero Grizzly
绅士棕熊 Cabellero Grizzly
好了 我们先找到皮套 还有 呃…一套衣服… Okay, we just find the shell, and the, uh... the outfit...
斯坦 你真的得找个店员帮你弄 Stan you really need employee assistance with this
我们会他妈成功的！你他妈给我闭嘴！ It's gonna fucking work! Just fucking shut up!
好 好 巴特斯 快看！ Okay. Okay, Butters look!
我们把填充物塞进去！ We're gonna put the stuffing in!
哇哦！ Wow!
好 呃 嗯… Okay, uh, um...
啊啊啊啊！天呐！ Aaaah! God!
没事的！我们可以重新开始！我们可以重新开始！ It's okay! We can start over! We can start over!
那边有个返工机器！快看！ There's a do-over machine right over there! Look!
斯坦利！ Stanley!
斯——坦！ St-a-a-a-a-an!
兰迪 要是斯坦死了怎么办？ What if he's dead, Randy?
他没死 莎伦 He's not dead, Sharon
那他为什么还没给我们打过电话？ Then why hasn't he even called?
嘿 能卖我点疫情特售吗？ Hey, can we have some of that Pandemic Special?
不能！ No!
现在大家不需要特售了 Nobody needs the special right now!
它根本不管用！ It's not helping!
噢 我的天 Oh, my God
-噢 天呐 不 -又怎么了？ Oh, God, no. What?
苹果蜂餐厅也被封了 They got Applebee's, too
回农场吧 莎伦 Drive me back to the farm, Sharon
我要拿个东西 I need to get something
见鬼了！ God dammit!
伙计 还是别管了 Dude, just let it go
不行 凯尔 我们不能让巴特斯失望！ No, Kyle, we can't let Butters down!
斯坦 你确定你这么做是为了巴特斯吗？ Stan, are you sure this is about Butters?
因为你似乎拼了命想造一只小熊 'Cause you seem really desperate to build a bear
那些抗议打砸的人听好了！ Attention protesting looters!
抗议和劫持违反了 Protesting slash looting is a violation
市长的卫生治安令 Of the mayor's health order
你们有五分钟的时间从里面出来 You have five minutes to come out
否则我们就要采取行动了 Or we will have to take action
我们得投降 伙伴们！ We gotta surrender, fellas!
而且我在造熊工坊这也没那么开心 讲真 I'm honestly not having that much fun anyways
不！我才不投降！ No! I'm not giving up!
好了 五分钟差不多到了 All right, that was about five minutes
兄弟们 家伙准备好！ Okay, boys, light 'em up!
等一下！ Wait!
所有人 都停下！ Everyone just stop!
这特么是谁啊？ Who the hell is that?
我有可能改变这一切的东西 I have something that might change all of this
是那只穿山甲！ 快看！ It's the pangolin! Look!
穿山甲！ 他找到了！ He found it! The pangolin!
他找到那只穿山甲了！ He's found it!
这是你们在找的东西 是吗？ This is what you've all been looking for, right?
行了 Well, here!
拿去做你们打算做的实验吧 Go ahead and do all the tests you want on it
你们会知道 You'll find out...
该知道的一切 Everything you need to know
见鬼 不行！ 我不会就这样让你们结束疫情的！ Oh, no! You're not ending this pandemic!
喂 卡特曼 别！ Hey! Cartman, no!
别杀了它 卡特曼！ 那东西是我们唯一的希望了 Don't do it, Cartman! That thing is our only chance
那是你们唯一的希望！为了你们的正常生活 不是我的！ Your only chance! For your normal, not mine!
我才不要上学！ I am not going back to school!
好吧 你们说对了 You guys were right, okay?
我这样做不是为了巴特斯 This hasn't been about Butters
只是因为我自己受不了 I've been acting like this because I can't take
这些停工停学的事情了 These shutdowns anymore
我害怕疫情对我造成的影响 And I'm scared what it's doing to me
所以我想找人怪罪 I'm looking for who to blame
说着想帮助别人 Saying I'm trying to help people
让自己好受一些 但说实话… To make myself feel better, because the truth is...
我只是想过回以前的生活 I just want to have fun again
我想让我能走出家门 面向世界 I wanted to see that I could go out in the world
做我以前做的事 但我做不到 And do things that I used to do, but I can't
我没变得更好 I'm not any better
也不比其他人更在乎这一切 And I don't care any more than anyone else
我这么做只是想过回我以前的生活而已 And I did all this because I just want my life back
我只想过回以前的生活… I just want my life back...
我真不敢相信… I don't believe it
那…那现在怎么样了？ So...So what happens now?
现在我们有希望了 Now we have hope
我们认识到 虽然我们也许没法过回从前的生活 We've learned that we might never get back to our old lives
但是只要齐心协力 我们就能找到新的方式适应… But by working together, we just might find a new way to...
噶啊啊！ 噢噢噢！ Aargh! Ohh!
别忘了出门投票啊 大伙们 Don't forget to get out and vote, everybody!
总统大选就要来喽 Big election coming up
由于南方公园小学的学生们突破了隔离 And since the students broke quarantine
※背景指2020年9月美国西部发生大规模山火
现在所有南方公园居民都暴露在疫情风险中 All South Park residents are now exposed
该镇将被完全封锁 未来将走向何方仍不得而知 And under complete lockdown for the unforeseeable future
我该怎么开始道歉呢？ How do I even begin to apologize?
你们说的对 You guys we were right
我想 我的脑子确实是被大麻搞糊涂了 I think all the marijuana really did go to my head
你们说…毒品就是毒品 我也不是从前的我了 You said it, a drug is a drug, and I'm not who I used to be
我是时候该坦白一切了 It's time for me to own up to everything
大家也是时候知道是什么引发了这场疫情 It's time everyone knew what started this pandemic
嘿 莎伦 我有事要和你谈谈 Hey, Sharon, I need to talk to you
我没你那么坚强 莎伦 I'm not as strong as you are, Sharon
我没法像你一样面对艰难时世 I can't deal with hard times the way that you can
只要你想谈 我随时都会听的 兰迪 If you're ready to talk, I'm ready to listen, Randy
怎么了？ What?
你说你不想和疫情特售扯上关系 You want nothing to do with the Pandemic Special
我说过 兰迪 我不吸大麻 No. I don't smoke marijuana, Randy
嗯哼 Uh-huh
你要和我谈什么吗？ What did you want to talk to me about?
我觉得 我会继续搞特售活动的 I just...think maybe I'm gonna do a few more specials
哦对了 你脸上沾了些脏东西 You got some shit on your face
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