那是什么 What is that?
是阴道 It's a vagina.
啊 是人的阴道 现在看出来了 Oh! A human vagina. Oh, I see it now!
人人都只会画鸡巴 这是性别歧视 Everyone always draws dicks. That's sexist.
我要推翻刻板印象 贱人们 I'm tryna to flip the script, bitches.
真美啊 这让我想到了我妈妈 So beautiful. It reminds me of my mother.
听着 乔治亚·奥基夫[美国画家] Listen, Georgia O'Keeffe,
要不是你非得搞得这么逼真 这把超强的喷射枪 if you hadn't made it so detailed, we'd still have some fuel left
还能剩点燃料 in that incredibly powerful gun.
我的艺术不会妥协 I will not compromise for my art.
好了 大家一起进入这条冰阴道 Okay, everyone into the ice vagina.
一起杀死急冻先生 Let's go kill Mr. Freeze.
哈莉·奎茵 第二季第四集
自从这个冰冻混蛋 I've been dreaming about
把我在一块冰里冻了好几个月 getting revenge on this freezer-burned dickhead
我就一直做梦都想找他复仇 ever since he froze me in a block of ice for months!
我想的是经典的"在他嘴里塞一颗苹果 I'm thinkin' classic "Stick an apple in his mouth
然后把他像头猪一样烤 and roast him like the pig he is."
-快看看你的移动手机 -什么 - Take a gander at your cellular telephone. - What?
天啊 他终于成功了 Oh, my God! He finally did it
她终于答应了 and she finally said yes!
不！！！！！！！！！！！！！
-太好了 -事不过三 - Huzzah! - Third time's a charm.
他能做得更好的 Eh, he could do better.
我爱婚礼 我和艾薇在婚礼上都很开心 Oh, I love weddings! Me and Ivy have so much fun at weddings.
我们会喝个烂醉 呕吐 We'll get so shit-faced, we puke,
取笑那些愚蠢的夫妻 make fun of all the dumb couples,
让DJ放《自你离开后》 make the DJ play "Since U Been Gone"
直到有个老爹要来揍我们 until a dad tries to fight us.
-你们以为自己在干什么 -给我站住 - What do you think you're doing? - Stop right there!
-滚出去 -散开 - Get out of here! - Spread out.
那我要告诉你 I got news for ya,
这是艾薇的婚礼 她就是那对愚蠢的夫妻之一 this is Ivy's wedding and she's the dumb couple.
你还得找个伴 You need to find a date.
不可能 他们说完"我愿意"后 No way! After the "I dos,"
基本就是自由活动时间 她肯定想一起玩的 It's basically free time. She'll wanna hang out.
对我来说 问题不是我会带谁 而是我会变成谁 For me, the question is not who I will bring, but who I will be!
我一直在努力创造一个新的角色 桑德拉 I've been working on a new character, Sandra.
她是单身主义者 特别喜欢玩 She's single, by choice, and down to clown!
我想我只能带锤头族的塔比莎了 I guess I'll bring Tabitha of the Hammerhead Clan,
毕竟我和她订婚了 I mean, I am betrothed to her.
后小丑时代的哈莉 Post-Joker Harley
想要能约多少人就约多少人 wants to hook up with as many randos as she can.
你带人去婚礼就说明你是认真的了 Ya bring someone to a wedding, that means you're serious.
带一个妓女就不算 Not if you bring a hooker.
你就是一个邪恶的小侏儒 You are a vile, pocket-sized man.
我不想再和任何人谈认真的恋爱了 I don't want anythin' serious with anybody again.
所以 我要一个人去 So, I'm going solo.
我唯一要认真的就是从12人爵士乐队里 The only thing I'm serious about, is gettin' some strange
挑上一个或几个男人 from one or several members of that 12-piece jazz band.
天啊 是碧昂丝 Oh, my God! It's Beyoncé!
天啊 是嘎嘎 Oh, my God. It's Lady Gaga!
哈莉·奎茵 Harley Quinn,
我一直在等你和你的小丑... I have been expecting you and your insane clown...
团队 Group.
神经 Psycho.
不 太冷了 Ah! No! It's too cold!
我脑子都冻住了 I've got brain freeze.
我要你穿上外套的 I did tell you to wear a jacket.
很遗憾 你无法适应寒冷 It is unfortunate that the cold displeases you so much,
你的身体核心温度将会 as the core temperatures of your bodies are about to
急剧下降 decrease precipitously.
真是个混蛋 Oh, what a dick!
看我的宿敌给我发了什么 Look what I just got from my nemesis.
"恭喜你订婚 调味品大王" "Congrats on the engagement. Condiment King"?
调味品大王 恭喜你订婚
真是个混球 是吧 What an asshole, right?
是啊 混球又混蛋 Yes, a dick and an asshole.
等等 为什么来着 再提醒我一下 Wait, why though? Can you just remind me?
我该从哪里说起 Pff! Uh, where do I begin?
没有加表情 看不出语气 还用的是句号 No emojis to convey the tone, and a period
而不是感叹号 instead of an exclamation point?
他是在嘲讽我 He's being sarcastic.
但他是我的宿敌 But what else should I expect
我能指望什么 from my nemesis?
恰克 你没事吧 Chuck, are you okay?
不 我要疯了 小帕 No! I'm freakin', Pam!
我们一定要得到这个婚礼场地 We have to get this wedding venue.
亲爱的 别给自己太多压力 Honey, don't put so much pressure on yourself.
我们只是来看一个场地 We're just touring one venue, right?
不 不是什么"一个场地" Ah, no. It's not just "One venue."
就要这个场地 It's the venue!
如果我们订不到 整个婚礼就毁... And if we don't get it, the whole wedding will be rui--
放轻松点 Hey! Relax. Okay?
我们只需要舞池 酒吧 All we need is a dance floor, booze,
以及凯莉·克莱森的金曲 在哪里都一样 and Kelly Clarkson's greatest hit. We could do it anywhere.
自从我看到梅兰妮和克林特·霍华德 I have been dreaming of getting married
一年一度名人婚礼后 at the old Gotham corn factory
我就一直梦想着能够在哥谭的旧玉米厂 ever since I saw Melanie and Clint Howard's nuptials
举办婚礼 in Obscure Celebrity Weddings Yearly.
那张照片 That photo spread
就像是一系列文艺时期的名画 was like a series of sick Renaissance paintings,
但是酷多了 我们也可以这样 but way sicker. That could be us!
所以 没错 我是有点紧张 So, yeah, I'm a little on edge.
那我们还等什么 亲爱的 Well, then what are we waiting for, hon?
-我们去定下那个场地 -没问题 - Let's go get that venue. - Hell yeah!
我们只要用我们之间超绝的爱 All we have to do is impress the venue manager
震撼那个场地管理 一切就尽在掌握 with our super dope love, and it is in the bag.
这领带和风筝配吗 Hey, uh, does this tie go with this kite?
没有和风筝配的领带 Okay, no tie goes with a kite.
但是你看上去很帅 But you do look really handsome.
我现在要给你们解冻 I will now unfreeze you.
拜托你们别跟闹腾的婴儿似的 Please, do not act as petulant babies,
我不想杀死你们 for I have no intention of killing you.
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我的天 Holy shit!
翻译 酸奶这周菜价最高也就199了
你要对我们做什么 你这个该死的混混混蛋 What are you gonna do to us, you frigid... Fuck?
校对 酸奶这周菜价最高也就199了
咒骂 是低智者的武器 Cursing. Hmph. The crutch of the illiterate.
人们都说我是杀人凶手 People call me a murderer,
但这用词不对 but that is a misnomer.
时间轴 风粤表示急冻人需要一片scp-500
我创建这个实验只是为了 You see, I created this lab for the sole purpose of
治愈我妻子患上的罕见血液疾病 finding a cure for my wife's incredibly rare blood disease.
后期 8T
那是绝症 It's terminal.
总监 酸奶这周菜价最高也就199了
很悲哀吧 Which is sad, right?
然而 希望依然存在 And yet, there is hope.
我已经在普通的雪鼠身上 I have been performing a multitude of experiments
进行了多次实验 on the common snow rat,
它们的DNA与人类相似度达98% which shares 98% of its DNA with that of a human.
实验大获成功 The experiments have been a rousing success.
他疯了 He's lost his shit!
这真是一个洗发水工厂 This is a real shampoo factory.
我的奶酪天爷啊
你们偶然来访的时间 Your arrival has proved fortuitous,
正是我决定 as it coincides with my decision
开始人体实验的时候 to move on to human experimentation.
得救了
作为一名医生 You know, speakin' doctor to mister,
我觉得你可能应该先在雪鼠上取得成功 maybe ya wanna get it right once with a snow rat
再进行人体实验 before ya move onto humans?
不 我有98%确定 No. I'm 98% sure
DNA中2%的差异就是关键 that the 2% difference in DNA is the issue.
先在我有你了 哈莉 And now that I have you, Harley,
我可以实践这个理论 I can put that theory to the test.
也许我们可以抽签决定谁先来 Maybe we pull straws to see who goes first?
他是一个鲨鱼人 He is a man shark,
他就像一个老年小男孩 he is like an aged little boy,
他...是个泥土人 and, hmm... A dirt man?
而你 不仅是唯一的人类 Yeah. Thus, you, being not only a human,
还是一个女人 你是最理想的目标 but also a human woman, are the ideal subject
该死 又来 Fuck, again?
我不知道这会有多疼 I do not know how much this will hurt,
因为完全丧失身体机能 due to the fact that complete loss of bodily functions
会导致很多情况 can mean any number of things.
但是 如果要我猜 But, were I to venture a guess,
我猜会有点...刺痛 I'd say that it will... sting a little.
等等 我知道怎么救你妻子 Wait! I know how we can save your wife!
你说你能救她的命只是为了 You're only saying you'll save her life to save your own.
所以呢 你不希望我救你老婆的命吗 So what, you don't want me savin' your wife's life?
好吧 不救了 Okay, I won't.
放轻松 不要这么急着下结论 Hey, relax, relax. Let's not jump to conclusions.
我们在协商 This is a negotiation.
你要如何让这奇迹发生呢 How do you propose to perform this miracle?
我朋友是一名博士 还是我认识的最聪明的人 My friend's a doctor and the smartest person I know.
天 这是你对我的最高评价了 Wow! That's the nicest thing you've ever said about me.
不是你 蠢蛋 是艾薇 Not you, idiot. Ivy.
好吧 这才合理 Yeah, that makes sense.
急冻 艾薇是一名天才植物学家 Look, freeze, Ivy's a genius biochemist.
如果她都找不到治愈的办法 If she can't find a cure,
那就没有人能了 there isn't one.
艾斯利博士为什么要帮我 Why would Dr. Isley help me?
她不会帮你 但是她会帮我 She wouldn't, but she'll help me.
赶紧把我放出去 Now, let me out of these restraints,
我给她发一个信息 I'll shoot her a quick text
她就会来帮你妻子恢复健康 and she'll come fix your wife up lickety-split.
这是一个令人愉快的提议 This is an agreeable proposition.
既然我们在等待 那就只有一件事可做了... There is only one thing we can do while we wait...
午饭 Lunch!
我去做准备 I will go make preparations.
你们有什么食物过敏或者恐惧症吗 Any food allergies or phobias I should be aware of?
没有吗 太好了 No? Ha! Wonderful.
哈莉 我不想质疑你的计划 Harley, look, I don't want to question your plan,
但是你真的觉得艾薇能找到治愈的办法吗 but do you really think Ivy can find a cure?
如果她找不到 急冻绝对会杀了我们 I mean, Freeze will for sure kill us if she doesn't.
那我们就这么接受了 So we're just breezing past the whole,
"他给我们准备午餐"的设定吗 "he's preparing us lunch" thing?
不知道 但我不会让她来到这个危险的地方 No idea, but I'm not bringin' her here and puttin' her in danger.
我在给我们争取时间 I'm buyin' us time.
这个怪人满脑子只有他快死的蠢蛋老婆 This weirdo is all gross and obsessed with his dumb, dying wife.
有人可能会觉得那是"爱" Some might call that "Love"?
随你怎么说 如果我们绑架她 威胁要杀死她 Whatever. If we take her hostage and threaten to kill her,
我们就能逼他交出他的冷冻枪 we can get him to give us his freeze ray.
然后 我们就能把他冻进一块冰里 And then, we can freeze his ass in a block of ice!
精彩的计划 简直是你最棒的计划 Wow. Great plan. This is one of your best.
不过我只有一个问题 I got one question though.
我们都被冻在了椅子上 How the hell are we supposed to find his wife,
怎么找到他老婆 when we're frozen to chairs?
有人能给我递一下奶酪通心粉吗 Could someone pass the mac and cheese?
天啊 Oh, my God.
怎么了 如果要我完成计划 What? If I'm going to pull off the plan,
我需要进食 I need sustenance.
我为大家准备这场午餐是因为 The reason I wanted to do this lunch is,
诺拉已经很久没有主持招待客人了 Nora hasn't hosted guests in quite some time.
所以我想 So I thought,
她肯定会很喜欢 this will be fun for her.
她的行动范围有限 Her options are limited.
天 这个蓝色变态以冷冻女人为乐 Jesus, that blue perv gets his jollies by freezin' women.
各位 开始享用我为你们准备的美味吧 Everyone, let us begin consumption of the bounty I have prepared.
好了 计划有变 作为曾经被冰冻的受害者 Okay, change of plans. As a former ice-block victim
以及如今全世界被冰冻女人的代表 and now champion of ice-blocked women all over the world,
我决定 我们要先救他的妻子 I decided we're gonna save his wife first,
再杀了他 then kill him.
早来了四分钟 很好 Four minutes early, perfect.
很急切 但不像孤注一掷 Eager, but not desperate.
我觉得那就算是迟到 哥们 That's late in my book, bro.
米切尔 你来这里干什么 Mitchell, what the hell are you doing here?
你没听说吗 Oh. Didn't you hear?
你不是这座城里唯一一个订婚的 You're not the only world-famous villain...
知名反派 ...engaged in this town.
不好意思 "致命反派" 别逗了 I'm sorry, "World-famous"? Come on.
新新哥谭的婚礼场地很难预定 Wedding venues are tough to come by in new New Gotham.
只剩下一个空余的周末了 And there's only one unbooked weekend left.
看来你要和调味品大王 So, it looks like you've got some competish
展开比试了 from the Condiment King.
我才不会在一个 I'm not getting married
全是调味品味儿的地方结婚 in any place with the stink of condiments.
我也不会在有风筝味的地方结婚 And I'm not getting married anywhere that reeks of kite!
是吗 风筝没有味道 Oh, yeah. Kites are odorless.
除非 Unless, uh...
弄湿了或者储存方式不当 我... They do get wet or if you store them improperly, I--
恰克 我们去哪里都能结婚 Chuck, we can do this wherever.
我不会放弃 I will not yield!
等经理看到全哥谭最强大的 Once the manager sees the biggest power couple
超能夫妻站在面前 in Gotham is in his presence,
并见识到我们之间的爱 and how sick our love is,
他就会把你这个乡巴佬 he'll kick your ranch-loving ass
踢回隐秘谷 all the way back to the Hidden Valley.
你衣服上的污渍可是很难让他欣赏你们了 Gonna be tough to impress him with that stain on your suit.
什么污渍 根本没有污渍 What stain? There's no stain!
那个污渍 That one.
好了 调味品大王 贝卡 你们先来的 All right, Condiment King, Becca, you got here first,
我先带你们进行参观 so let me take you on the tour.
擦干净你衣服上的污渍 For the schmutz on your suit.
他为什么要那么做 你的脸怎么了 Why's he doing that? What's wrong with your face?
小家伙 吃下煮熟的肉 Small man, as the consumption of cooked meats
会让我的体温升高 从而让我有生命危险 increases my body temperature and puts me at risk of death,
拜托你帮我个忙 形容一下你嘴里牛排的味道 please, a little favor. Describe the mouthfeel of your steak.
黄油味 Butter-like?
像黄油 好的 Mmm, like butter. Yes.
好吧 这简直就是奇怪的《沉默的羔羊》桥段 All right, this is some weird Silence of the Lambs shit.
看来你也胃口不错 Ah! I see you found your appetite,
你这只等不及的小雪鼠 my eager little snow rat.
你们是怎么认识的 So, how'd y'all meet?
她当时还活着吗 Was she alive then?
说起来好笑 诺拉 你说得比我好 It's a funny story. Nora, you tell it better than I do.
她只是害羞 Oh, she's being shy.
我来说吧 I'll tell it.
诺拉本来管理一家夫妻共有低温实验室 Nora was the owner of a mom-and-pop cryogenics lab,
而我却要毁掉那里 and I was determined to squash it.
作为跨国企业的总裁 You see, as the CEO of a multinational corporation,
我要对我的股东们负责 I had a duty to my shareholders.
不扩张只能死 Expand or die.
虽然听起来没有关系 Now, seemingly unrelated,
但我后来在网上遇到了一个很说得来的陌生人 I had really hit it off with an enchanting stranger online.
你们绝对猜不到那是谁 You'll never guess who it was.
-你老婆 -梅格·莱恩 - Your wife. - Meg Ryan?
-诺拉 -我就说了 - Nora. - Yeah. Like I said,
她说得更好 she tells it better.
好啊 Huzzah!
可爱的约会 A meet-cute for the ages.
我只听出了一个为所谓为的混蛋 All I hear is a story of a big swinging dick
插手毁掉了一个女人的营生 coming in and ruining a woman's livelihood.
你真扫兴 Oh, you grinch.
听着 请原谅我们的这位朋友 Look, you'll have to excuse my friend here.
她现在对真爱酸得不行 She's all sour on love right now.
是的 她连去她闺蜜婚礼的伴儿都找不到 Yeah, she's not even taking a date to her best friend's wedding.
这里面放了姜黄吗 Ooh, is there turmeric in this?
真的很提味 不错 That is a swift kick, nice.
你的愤世嫉俗应该来源于 I suspect your cynicism comes from
你从未体验过真爱 never having experienced true love.
没错 绝对是姜黄 Oh, yeah, this is definitely turmeric.
我告诉你什么事真爱 你这个混蛋 I'll tell you about true love, you fuckin' bitch!
真爱让我葬送了我作为心理医生的职业生涯 True love made me sacrifice my career as a psychologist,
永远改变了我的模样 permanently change the way I look,
还好几次 差点把我弄死 and almost got me killed, like, so many times.
爱就是鬼扯 Love is bullshit!
菠菜泡芙好了 Oh, spinach puffs.
我永远不会原谅小丑 I will never forgive Joker
对你的心所造成的伤害 for the damage he's done to your heart.
让你放弃了爱 Making you give up on love
可能是他最严重的罪行 was perhaps his greatest crime of all.
我还敢打赌 你的发泄 I'm also willing to bet that your outburst
应该让我们吃不上菠菜泡芙了 nearly cost us spinach puffs.
谁还在乎那些泡芙 Who cares about the puffs?
我们被我们来杀的人关了起来 We're imprisoned by the person we came here to kill!
我们要搞到那把枪 We need to get that gun.
我只是在吃下我的感受 I'm just eating my feelings.
他的故事太感人了 His story was so moving.
问题解决了 Problem solved.
还没有 牛排没有调味 Not entirely. The steak is under-seasoned,
桌子上好像连一粒盐都没有 and there doesn't seem to be a grain of salt on the table.
天 你真是蠢到令人发指 God! Your stupidity is astounding.
泥脸 拿起枪 把我们解冻 再把枪给我 Clayface, grab the gun, de-ice us, then give me the gun.
-好计划 老大 -难以置信 - Great plan, boss! - Unbelievable.
先解冻我 我好冷 我的蛋蛋都缩成两个点了 Do me first. I'm so cold, my nuts are the size of Dippin' Dots!
你不是一直都是两个点吗 Is that unusual for you?
什么 不 What? No!
我那是正常大小的... I have regular-sized--
哎呀 Whoopsies!
这句谢谢是为我和哈莉一起说的 I think I speak for me and Harley, when I say, thank you.
我们来看看 找到了 Let me find this. Ah, there we are.
蛋蛋 ...testes!
这些的确是从店里卖的 但是你们... Sure, they're store-bought, but you--
听好了 你这个疯子 Listen up, you crazy asshole.
我才不行你的愚蠢故事 I'm not buyin' your bullshit story!
我知道你的妻子没有生病 I know your wife ain't sick.
她可能想要离开你 She probably tried to leave you,
但你受不了 就把她冰冻了 and you couldn't handle it, so you fuckin' froze her.
你在干什么 What are you doing?
把她被你夺走的自由还给她 Giving her the freedom you denied.
你就像我的前男友 你这个控制狂魔 You're just like my ex, you creepy control freak.
诺拉不再是属于你的东西了 Nora's not your property anymore!
哈莉 你不知道你在做什么 Harley, you don't know what you're doing!
这是为你毁掉了她的事业 This is for ruining her small business.
你现在没有你这把愚蠢的枪了 Now that you don't have your stupid gun,
我要杀了你 I'm gonna kill you.
看 我就说她没事 你这个混蛋 See? I told ya she was fine, ya piece of shit!
亲爱的 我看到了你的脸 My love, that I gaze upon your face
这只意味着一件事 can only mean one thing.
你找到了治愈的办法 You've found a cure!
我不会再死于这种罕见的血液疾病了 I'm not going to die of this incredibly rare blood disease anymore,
我们终于能一直在一起了 and we can spend the rest of our lives together.
不好意思 你说什么 I'm sorry, what was that?
你给她判了死刑 You've condemned her to death.
你最好祈祷你的朋友艾薇能找到解药 You better hope your friend Ivy can find a cure,
不然我就炸掉这个地方 or I'm going to blow this entire place up
我们都同归于尽 and kill us all.
好 我看看她什么时候来 Right. Let me check on her ETA.
等等 你是想说 Wait. You're telling me
蒜泥蛋黄酱只是蛋黄酱加点料吗 aioli is just mayo mixed with something else?
算是一点行业机密 Little bit of an industry secret.
-配玉米很棒 -滚出镇子啦 - It goes great on corn. - Get outta town!
不 别滚 你还要举办婚礼呢 No, don't get outta town, you got a wedding.
你们好 Oh, hi!
我就说我闻到了风筝味 I thought I smelled a kite.
天 天 Oh, jeez. Oh, jeez!
看看他们俩亲密的样子 Look at those two, thick as thieves.
梦想都很愚蠢 Dreams are stupid.
我们不可能订到这里 赶紧走吧 Never gonna get this place. We should just leave.
喂 看过来 Hey! Hey! Up here. Okay?
别管那混蛋 他是个混蛋 Fuck that guy, he's a dick.
我知道这对你来说有多重要 所以我准备好了 I know how important this is to you, okay, so I'm prepared.
我们要进去 We're gonna go in there,
把这个经理惊掉下巴 we're gonna blow that manager's goddamn socks off.
-当然了 这里就是... -大阶梯 - And this is, of course... - The staircase,
因为克林特·霍华德夫妇而出名的 made famous by Mr. And Mrs. Clint Howard.
这就是封面照 It was the cover shot.
我都起鸡皮疙瘩了 Ah, ooph! I've got goose bumps.
你觉得这个地方 Do you think this place
只是给好莱坞名流结婚的场所吗 is just a wedding mill for Hollywood royalty?
不 当然不是了 Oh, no. Of course not.
老哥谭玉米厂拥有深厚的历史底蕴 I mean, the old Gotham corn factory is just so rich with history.
这才是我们最关注的的方面 You know, I think that's what we really connect with.
真的吗 你们对这个地方有多少了解呢 Oh, really? What exactly do you know about this place?
小哈
是哈莉 她从来不打... Ah! It's Harley, and she never calls...
十一个电话 除非是急事 eleven times, unless it's an emergency.
玉米... Ha! Uh, corn...
玉米...婚礼... Um, the maize... Yeah, venue...
未婚妻...爱... Ah, fiancée... The love... Um, well, uh,
我...我是个随便的人 you know, Per-- I'm a husk guy.
-所以... -宝贝 很抱歉 - So, uh-- - Babe, I'm so sorry,
哈莉惹了点不得了的麻烦 Harley's gotten herself into some serious trouble,
我要去救她了 and I have to go save her.
对不起 我爱你 我爱你 I'm sorry. I love you. I love you!
你要用你对玉米的喜欢 So you were about to enlighten me
来让我大吃一惊吗 on your personal connection to corn?
我会错意了吗 没错 Did I misread the situation? Yes.
但是小艾 要是你看到他给她喂汤 你也会这么做的 But Ive, if you'd seen him feed her soup, you'da done the same.
他们会找到治愈的办法 亲爱的 They'll find a cure, my love.
但如果他们找不到 我们就一起死 But if they don't, we will die together.
因为我会炸掉这个地方 Because I'm blowing the whole place up!
不 你不会的 No, you are not!
如果给你另一只眼 Hey, would it speed things up
也搞一个显微镜 能不能加快进度 if I got ya a microscope for the other eye?
不行 不过顺便 Yeah, no. But BTdubs,
谢谢你把我卷进来 thanks so much for getting me involved in this.
我本来一直不想把你卷进来 I actively tried not to put ya in the situation.
然后发生了什么 And then what happened?
-然后 我搞砸了 -难怪 - Well then, I... I fucked up the situation. - There it is.
我不知道该怎么办了 I didn't know what else to do!
只能打给我认识的最聪明 最厉害 最性感的人 Other than call the smartest, coolest, hottest person I know.
这倒没错 Well, that is true.
听着 急冻疯了 Look, Freeze is crazy!
是他策划了不义联盟对我的偷袭 He orchestrated the whole Injustice League hit on me.
荒谬的指控 How absurd.
我在一块冰里醒来 I woke up in a block of ice.
这是你的标志 你想杀了我 That's your signature move! You tried to kill me!
其他人都想杀你 Everyone else wanted to kill you,
但是我说服了他们只是冰冻你 but I convinced them to freeze you.
你也可以想象 As you can imagine,
一群男性异性恋性别歧视的白种犯罪头子 a group of white, cis-gendered, heterosexual, male, crime lords,
都是非常乐于把一个女人 they loved the idea of turning a woman
变成一个无助的装饰品 into a helpless object of mockery.
这下你自豪了吧 Well, I hope you're proud of yourself.
你错误地指控了新新哥谭里觉醒程度最高的 You've falsely accused the most woke ice-themed villain
冰冻反派 in all of new New Gotham.
这真是太疯狂了 但我觉得我可能找到答案了 Okay, this is crazy, but I think I might have our answer.
谢天谢地 Oh, thank God.
我...我要接一下 怎么了 亲爱的 I... I gotta take this. Sup, babe-arino?
嗯 你以前的温室 嗯 Ah, yeah... Oh. Your old greenhouse? Yeah...
还记得我们以前去那里的时候 Hey, remember when we were there
蚜虫都爬到了我身上 and I had a couple too many margs,
然后不知道怎么...是急事啊 and next thing you know... Oh... Oh, it is urgent?
为你做一切都可以 Anything for you.
我的未婚妻需要风筝人立马出动 My betrothed needs the K-man ASAP.
如果你现在离开 If you leave right now,
这绝对会影响到我的决定 this is definitely going to affect my decision.
好的影响吗 因为你看到了 Positively? Because you'll see
我有多爱我的未婚妻 愿意为她做一切 how much I love my fiancée and will do anything for her,
这比我们和玉米之间 which is far more important
所有的联系都要重要 than any corn connection we might have?
-当然不是 -好吧 - Absolutely not. - Well...
我们为爱做的一切 对吧 The things we do for love, right?
真没想到 I wouldn't know.
再确认一下 我要找什么颜色的花瓣 Just to double-check, what color petals am I looking for?
洋红色 Magenta.
好吧 好吧 Right, right.
就是...就是偏红的粉色吗 That... That's like a reddish pink?
不 不 是偏紫的粉色 No, no. It's a purplish pink.
别碰偏红的粉色 那是致瘫的 Don't touch the reddish pink ones, they're paralytic, okay?
好吧 大概问一下 Cool. And, uh, ballpark,
那个大概多久会起效... uh, how long does that take to kick in--
你知道吗 You know what?
这不重要 Doesn't matter,
因为我绝对没有碰偏红的粉花 'cause I definitely didn't touch the reddish pink one.
几分钟后到 There in a few.
天 Oh, boy!
我碰了偏红的粉花 I touched the reddish pink one.
嗯 我看出来了 Uh, yeah, I see that.
别担心 会...会消退的 Don't worry, it's... It's gonna wear off.
好了 看起来不错 Okay, looks good.
好了 诺拉需要输血 Okay, so Nora needs a blood transfusion,
但不幸的是 她的血型 but unfortunately, her blood type
和她的血液病一样稀有 is as rare as her blood disease.
永远是我独特的小蝴蝶 Ever my unique butterfly.
你注射了这种血清后 Once you inject this serum,
就会把你的血型转变成和诺拉一样 it will change your blood type to Nora's.
然后 我们就能把你健康的血液输送给你妻子 And then, we can give your healthy blood to your wife.
"你的妻子" "Your wife!"
但是输血会让你丧命 But, the transfusion will kill you.
节哀 My condolences.
你为什么非要说出会丧命 Why the hell did you have to say the death part?
现在他要逼我们其中一人注射了 Now he's going to make one of us do it!
我从来没有像现在这么庆幸我的鲨鱼血统 Well, I've never been more thankful for my shark blood.
之前也说了 And, as previously stated,
我是土人 所以我用了也没用 I am a dirt thing, so it won't work on me.
真是绝了 This is bullshit.
不 这必须由我来牺牲 No, it must be my sacrifice.
我之所以这辈子都穿着 The only reason I've suffered through life
这件该死的冷冻服 in this godforsaken cryo-suit,
就是为了找到治愈诺拉的办法 is to find a cure for Nora.
如果这一刻真的来临 If that time has come,
我将会笑着拥抱我的死亡 then I greet my end with open arms.
上帝啊 这真是疯了 Holy shit, that's insane.
这不是疯了 It is not insane,
因为如果你真的爱一个人 for if you truly love someone,
你为为他们做一切 you will do anything for them.
我美丽的女孩啊 My beautiful girl.
再见了 亲爱的 Goodbye, my love.
享受我从没给过你的人生吧 Have the life I could never give you.
我会永远爱着你 I will never stop loving you.
不 No!
天啊 Oh, God!
我感觉到感觉了 I'm feeling feelings!
这是我见过最真挚的真爱 I've never seen truer love than that.
该死 这跟我和小丑之间的感情根本不一样 Damn. That's nothin' like what Joker and I had.
我猜那也挺不错的 I guess that would be kinda nice.
不要对自己要求太高了 Oh. Don't be too hard on yourself.
我们都经历过扭曲了我们 We've all been in toxic relationships
恋爱观的有毒恋爱 that skewed our thoughts on love.
莱斯莉啊 Leslie.
开心点 小哈 如果我能找到真爱 Chin up, Harls. I mean, if I can find true love,
你肯定也可以的 then there's hope for you too.
我真是为你们高兴 I'm so happy for you guys.
节哀顺变 And my condolences to you.
他看上去是一个很好的人 He seemed like a really great guy.
是啊 是个好人 Yeah, good guy.
-真的很抱歉 -他是一个真正的男人 - So, so sorry. - He was a real mensch.
我们能走了吗 Can we go now?
天啊 赶紧滚 Oh, my God! Get out of here!
宝贝 我...我很抱歉在婚礼场地弃你而去 Babe, I'm just... I'm so sorry that I left the venue.
我知道那对你来说有多重要 I know how much this meant to you,
希望我没有搞砸一切 and I hope I didn't mess it all up.
今天我准备道歉时 意识到一件事 While I totes appreesh the apology, I realized something today.
我们在哪里结婚并不重要 It doesn't matter where we get married,
唯一重要的是我要和你结婚了 the only thing that matters, is that I get to marry you.
我甚至都不在乎场... I don't even care about the ven--
我就知道我无私的姿态会有回报 I knew my selfless gesture would be rewarded.
哥谭旧玉米场
这就像是喜剧的收尾 Ah! It's just like the end of a rom-com!
风筝人接通 You're go for the K-man.
希望你有备选的场地 风筝混蛋 Hope you had a backup venue, you kited douche!
米切尔 Mitchell?
不 让斯图接电话 No, put Stew on.
-不 他说得没错 -看来你没有 - No, he's right. - Looks like you didn't...
"符合标准"[切芥末] "Cut the mustard."
天啊 开始了 Oh, Jesus, here we go.
你永远别想追上[番茄酱]我 You'll always be trying to "Ketchup" To me.
他不是认真的吧 He can't be serious.
祝你[蛋黄酱]日安 "Mayo" Have a good day.
他是认真的 He is.
我先下了[塔塔酱] "Tartar" For now.
挂了 Closer.
他现在也变成我的宿敌了 I think he's my nemesis now, too.