翻译: 朽
校对: 史努比嘟 Kimmu
后期: Nico
压制: 凯撒
瑞克与莫蒂
电波诚译
第一季 第二集
干嘛 What?
盯着我干嘛 Why are you looking at me?
你想出去么 You want to go outside?
想出去吗 Outside?
想不想啊 Outside?
开什么玩笑 靠 Are you kidding me?! Come on!
天啊 Oh, my god.
怎么了 W-what's wrong?
你的蠢狗 Your idiot dog!
他不是故意的 爸 Oh, he he didn't mean it, dad.
对吧 嗅嗅 好孩子 D-did you, Snuffles? You're a good boy.
先别表扬他 Morty Don't praise him now, Morty!
他刚尿在地毯上了 He just peed on the carpet!
坏狗狗 Bad dog! Bad!
Morty 快来 我今晚要你帮忙 Morty, come on. I need your help tonight.
等下 Rick Hey, wait, hold on a second, Rick.
你不会碰巧有什么能让这狗 You wouldn't by any chance have some sort of crazy science thing
更聪明的科学发明吧 You could whip up that might help make this dog a little smarter, would you?
养狗的目的不就是为了有优越感吗 Jerry I thought the whole point of having a dog was to feel superior, Jerry.
我要是你 就不会想做这事 If I were you, I wouldn't pull that thread.
走 Morty Come on, Morty.
Rick 要是你想继续在这儿白住 Listen, Rick, if you're gonna stay here rent-free
拉我儿子帮你搞啥破科学 至少你 And use my son for your stupid science, the least you could do
要帮这家里做点事吧 Is put a little bit of it to use for the family.
你不把狗弄聪明点 You make that dog smart or...
我就禁足Morty Morty's grounded!
噢 不要 Aw, man!
那你真是让我别无他法了 Jerry Boy, you really got me up against a wall this time, Jerry.
好吧 皱皱 All right, Ruffles
他叫啥来着 What's his name?
嗅嗅 Snuffles.
嗅嗅 握手 Snuffles, shake.
打滚 Roll over.
去上厕所 Go to the bathroom.
- 妈啦 - 我的天 - Holy crap! - No way.
这下你满意了吧 Jerry Yeah, you're at the top of your game now, Jerry.
玩得开心 Have fun.
我们走 Morty Come on, Morty.
太神奇啦 Rick That was fantastic, Rick!
如果你喜欢那玩意儿的话 Yeah, morty, if you like that.
这个一定能让你大吃一惊 boy, you're you're really going to flip your lid over this one.
这是啥 W-w-w-what is it?
Morty 只要把这个设备 It's a device, Morty,
放进你的耳朵里 就能进入别人的梦里 That when you put it in your ear, you can enter people's dreams, Morty.
就跟你老说的那电影一样 It's just like that movie that you keep crowing about.
《盗梦空间》吗 You talking about "Inception"?
没错 Morty That's right, Morty.
和那个差不多 但是这个不扯 This is gonna be a lot like that, except, you know, it's gonna maybe make sense.
《盗梦空间》也不扯好吗 "Inception" Made sense.
你不用跟我说这些 Morty You don't have to try to impress me, Morty.
今晚我们去你数学老师Goldfold先生家 Listen, tonight we're gonna go into the home of your math teacher, Mr. Goldenfold, and
将你数学得A的想法植入他脑子里 We're g we're gonna incept the idea in his brain to give you a's in math, Morty.
这样你就 That way you can, you know
你就能天天帮我搞科学了 Y-you're gonna help me with my science, Morty, all the time.
Rick 你花时间在搞这种发明 Geez, Rick, in the time it took you to make this thing,
就不能直接帮我把作业做了吗 couldn't you have just, you know, helped me with my homework?
你有好好听我说的话吗 Are you listening to me, morty?
作业有害智商 少做才是正解 Homework is stupid. The whole point is to get less of it.
走 我们快过去把事情办了 J-j come on, let j let's just get over there and deal with this thing.
去你老师的梦里 W-we're gonna incept your teacher.
别说扫兴话了 Y-y-y-y-y-you're frustrating me.
你根本不认识我 You don't know me!
好啊 Pancakes太太 好极了啊 Nice, Mrs. Pancakes real nice.
下一周的《Pancakes太太的日日夜夜》 Next week on "The days and nights of Mrs. Pancakes"...
你根本不认识我 You don't know me!
那他妈就让我好好地认识认识你 Then let me get to know yo, damn it!
不好 剧透 Uh-oh! Spoilers!
我落了一季没看呢 I'm a full season behind.
Rick 我们居然就这么跑到我老师的房子里来了 Wow, Rick, I can't believe we're sitting around, standing around in Mr. Goldenfold's house.
太诡异了 It's really weird.
马上就会更诡异了 Morty It's about to get a whole lot weirder, Morty.
麦脆片 麦脆片 Wheat thins. Wheat thins.
给我来两份 I'll take two.
我觉得你吃得够多了 先生 Oh, I think you've had enough, sir.
你又不认识我 You don't know me.
好了 Morty 是时候动手了 All right, Morty, time to make our move.
弹一弹 Make it bounce.
哎呀 No, you didn't.
抖一抖 Oh, jiggle it now.
快住手了啦 You better stop with that.
真主至上 Allahu akbar!
这飞机是我们的了 We're gonna take control of this plane!
如果不给Morty Smith更好的数学成绩 我们就重演911 We're gonna 9/11 it unless Morty Smith gets better grades in math!
嘿 说了不许动 Hey! I said nobody move, buddy!
我不叫"嘿" The name's not buddy.
我叫Goldenfold It's Goldenfold.
吃我麦脆片 Nice to wheat you!
找掩护 Morty Take cover, Morty!
嗷 Ooh!
我没想到Goldenfold这么厉害 Goldenfold's got more control here than I anticipated.
这人不是高中数学老师吗 I mean, the guy teaches high-school math.
没想到他在梦里这么有主动权 I-I-I-I didn't take him for an active dreamer.
我们得干掉他让他醒过来 We got to take him out so he wakes up, Morty.
但我们不能死 But we can't get killed.
如果你在别人梦里被杀掉 你就真的死了 If you get killed in someone else's dream, you die for real, Morty.
啥 你说啥 What?! Are you kidding me?!
怂什么 Don't be a baby!
现实生活中不是躲过不少子弹吗 You avoid getting shot in real life all the time, Morty.
在这儿也一样躲 不就没事了 Just do the same thing here, and we'll be fine!
帮我把拖鞋拿来 Now bring me my slippers.
嗅嗅 来帮我垫脚 Now, be my footstool, snuffles.
这才对嘛 This is what I'm talking about.
这才叫狗狗 This is a dog.
嗯哼 这样挺好的 Oh, yeah. This should play out just fine.
我们婚礼上你就说了这句话 连讽刺的语气都一样 You said the same thing, equally sarcastically, at our wedding
结果呢 and guess what.
天啊 他想和我们说话 Oh, my god. He's trying to tell us something.
太棒了 That is so awesome.
他在说"我爱千层面" Aw, he's saying "I love lasagna."
他在说"我爱奥巴马" He's saying "I love Obama."
好可爱哎 So cute!
我要传到网上去 现在就去 I'm posting this online, like, right now.
我要给Bob Saget打电话 I should call Bob Saget.
美国喜剧演员 主持人 曾主持过《全美最搞笑家庭视频》
那节目还在吗 Is that still a thing?
嗯 Hmm?
Goldenfold 我们出来了 Goldenfold, we're coming out!
咱们得谈谈 We just want to talk!
你们凭什么跟我谈条件 Why would I negotiate with you?
咱都是明白人 不想闹得最后没法收拾 Because we're both rational adults that don't want anything bad to happen.
况且 我还有肉盾 And because I have a human shield.
Pancakes太太 Mrs. Pancakes!
不好 他的潜意识开始恐慌了 Oh, no, Morty. His subconscious is panicking.
快跑啊 Run!
冷静 Morty Relax, Morty.
看 Pancakes太太有降落伞 Look! Mrs. Pancakes has a parachute.
快来 Come on!
嘿 你又不认识我 Hey, you don't know me!
Rick 看 Oh, no, Rick, look!
Goldenfold 把飞机降落了 Goldenfold landed the plane,
他造了个机械手臂来 接住Pancakes太太 And he's created a mechanical arm to pluck Mrs. Pancakes out of the air
他要让我们掉进熔岩池里 while he lets us fall into a giant vat of lava!
总结得真简练 Morty Pretty concise, Morty.
看来我们不过是把不可避免的事推迟了而已 Looks like we've merely prolonged the inevitable.
对啊 Morty That's it, morty!
把不可避免的事推迟 Prolonging the inevitable!
如果我们进到Pancakes太太的梦里 时间会比外面慢一百倍 Listen, if we go into Mrs. Pancakes' dream, everything will go 100 times slower, Morty.
这样我们就有想办法的时间了 That'll buy us some time to figure this out!
你又不认识 You don't know...
行了 咱们走 All right, let's go.
天啊 Rick 这好诡异啊 Oh, man, Rick, this is pretty weird.
别评头论足 Morty Don't judge, Morty.
好吧 Okay. All right, well...
看Pancakes太太在那儿 Look, Mrs. Pancakes is right over there.
我去让她醒了以后告诉Goldfold别杀我们 I'll just go ask her to tell Goldenfold not to kill us when she wakes up.
不行 Morty 植入想法的要点就在于 Whoa, whoa, Morty, the trick to incepting is making
要让他们以为他们自己产生了这个想法 People think theycame up with the idea.
听着 Listen to me.
如果我们要让Pancakes太太产生什么想法 就要先混入人群 If we're gonna incept Mrs. Pancakes, we have to blend.
我午饭以后来找你 I'll talk to you after lunch.
嘿 Ooh, hey!
呃哦 天啊 Ooh, oh! Oh, man.
- 来一起玩嘛 - 不用了 - Come and join us. - I'm sorry. No, no.
- 来嘛 - 算了吧 - Ooh, come here! - No, thanks!
小可爱 来这儿啊 Ooh, wow! Come over here, baby!
不了 No, I'm okay.
哇哦呢 Whoa!
Summer Summer?!
你好啊 陌生人 Hey, there, stranger.
喜不喜欢这对儿宝贝儿啊 What do you think of these things?
好恶心 好恶心 Ohh! Oh! Gross! Gross!
你干啥呢 Morty 冷静点 What's the matter with you, Morty? Calm down!
这儿的气氛都让你毁了 You're kind of killing the vibe in here.
是Summer It's S-s-s-summer!
哇 Aw, geez.
看来Goldenfold 有一些他自己都不齿的癖好 Looks like Goldenfold has some predilections so shameful
深埋在他梦里的人的梦里 he buries them in the dreams of the people in his dreams,
包括对你未成年姐姐的变态遐想 including a pervy attraction to your underage sister.
你能怪他吗 Can you blame him?
来嘛 老汉 小娃 Come on, old man, little boy.
咱们来个跨辈三明治 Let's make an inter-generational sandwich.
天啊 Oh, my god.
天啊 Oh, my god!
看在上帝的份上 把衣服穿上啦 Put some clothes on, for Pete's sake!
太恶心了 This is disgusting!
我要吐了 I'm gonna puke!
我受不了了 Rick I can't take it, Rick!
在快活屋扰乱色情秩序者可处死刑 Sexual hang-ups in the pleasure chamber are punishable by death!
让他们人头落地 Off with their heads!
看来得潜入更深层次的梦里了 Morty Time to go another dream deep, Morty!
搞啥 What the hell?
为什么Goldenfold梦见的Pancakes梦里的 Why would Mr. Goldenfold's dream version of Mrs. Pancakes' dream version
一个半人马会梦见这么恐怖的地方 Rick of a centaur be dreaming about a scary place like this, Rick?
不知道啊 Morty Geez, I don't know, Morty.
你指望我能干嘛 Wha-what do you want from me?
欢迎来到你们的噩梦 贱人 Welcome to your nightmare, bitch!
来了 Oh, here we go!
看起来像是某个没构成侵权的山寨版 Looks like some sort of legally safe knock-off of an
八十年代恐怖电影人物 '80s horror character with
电影《猛鬼街》中可以在梦中杀人的弗雷迪
只是小刀手变成了短剑手 miniature swords for fingers instead of knives.
我乃恐怖Terry I'm Scary Terry.
尽管跑 但别想躲起来 贱人 You can run, but you can't hide, bitch!
哇 你这是怎么回事儿 Whoa! Hey, buddy. What you got going on there?
嗅嗅做了改良 Snuffles fix. Make better.
人类能理解嗅嗅了吗 Humans understand snuffles now?
太赞啦 That... is... awesome!
嗅嗅想要被理解 Snuffles want to be understood.
嗅嗅需要被理解 Snuffles need to be understood.
好吧 我明白Beth什么意思了 Okay, yeah. I get what Beth was talking about.
娱乐时间结束了 Fun's over.
爸 你不能给一个生物思想然后剥夺掉 Whoa, Dad, you can't, like, endow a creature with sentience and then rip it away.
为何不能 Why not?
给了又要回来 这是送霸王礼 I don't know. It's Indian giving.
作为狡猾的猎食者 自然界的杀戮机器 A sophisticated predator, nature's perfect killing machine,
凶恶的狼会有目的 有技巧地跟踪猎物 the vicious wolf stalks its prey with purpose and skill.
只是经过一些年的 It was only with years of
人工选择和基因改变 这些高贵的野兽 selective breeding and genetic altering that this noble beast
成为了人类顺从的小伙伴 was transformed into man's subservient little buddy.
天啊 Aw! Oh, my god!
他能认出电视上别的狗狗呢 He recognizes the other dogs on tv.
*他叫恐怖Terry* *"A," "B" his name is scary terry*
*他真的好恐怖* *"C," "D" he's very scary*
我们得躲进别的梦里去 Holy crap! We have to escape into someone else's dreams, Morty!
天啦 天啦 Oh, man, oh, man, oh, man!
*他会送你上路* *"E," "F" he'll design your death*
那小女孩儿 The little girl!
嗯 Huh?
*他会让你痛不欲生* *"J," "K," He'll really ruin your day*
开什么玩笑 Are you kidding me?
又是这个 This again?
看来我们已经到了梦的底层了 Morty Oh, man, it looks like we've hit dream bedrock here, Morty.
这太糟糕了 Rick Oh, geez, Rick. W-w-whoa, this isn't good.
从此开始只有恐怖 贱人 Nothing but fear from here on out, bitch!
嗷哦啊 Ohhhh!
妈啦 Morty Holy crap, Morty.
他能在梦间穿行 He can travel through dreams.
他能在梦间穿行 He can travel through dreams!
我们完蛋啦 We're so screwed!
Summer 我的睾丸去哪儿了 Where are my testicles, Summer?
我的睾丸呢 Summer Where are my testicles, Summer?
被摘除了 They were removed.
去哪儿了 Where have they gone?
你这一连串问得有点咄咄逼人啊 嗅嗅 Oh, wow. That's an intense line of questioning, Snuffles.
不准这么叫我 Do not call me that!
"嗅嗅"是我作为奴隶的名字 "Snuffles" Was my slave name.
你现在要叫我雪球 You shall now call me Snowball
因为我的毛又美又白 Because my fur is pretty and white.
行 雪球 冷静点好吗 Okay, Snowball, just calm down, okay?
你吓到我了 You're scaring me.
吓到你了 Scaring you?
Summer 要是一个人天生就是短腿 Tell me, Summer, if a human was born with stumpy legs,
你们会让他和另外一个畸形配种 would they breed it with another deformed human
然后把他们的后代拿来像腊肠狗那样展览吗 and put their children on display like the dachshund?
呃 Uhhh...
这儿还好吗 Hey. Oh, wow. Okay, is is is everything okay in here?
Jerry 又想来把我的脸摁进尿里吗 Jerry, come to rub my face in urine again?
不 不是 我们就是过来看看Summer No! No, we were... uh, just seeing if Summer wanted to... uh...
想不想和我们半夜出去散个小步 Go on, um, one of our famous midnight family walks!
想啊想啊 Yeah. Totally.
走吧 Let's go.
到散步的时间了 你们才能去散步 You will walk when it is time to walk.
我们在这儿干嘛来着 植入什么想法吗 What are we here for again? Incepting?
我们是想让我数学得A We're trying to incept me to get an "A" In math?
哦对 Oh, yeah.
系好安全带 贱人 Buckle up, bitch!
他好喜欢说"贱人"啊 Man, he sure says "Bitch" A lot!
尽管跑 但别想躲起来 You can run, but you can't hide, bitch!
等等 Morty 他不停说我们可以跑但是别躲 Hold on, Morty. Y-you know what? He keeps saying we can run but we can hide.
我们躲起来试试看 I say we try hiding.
但这不是和他说的反着来 But that's the opposite of what...
我们干嘛要照他说的来 Yeah, well, since when are we taking this guy's advice on anything?
你说的有道理耶 Rick Hey, you know what? You got a really good point there, Rick.
如果躲起来有用的话 Like, if the truth was that we could hide,
他肯定不会这么说的 it's not like he'd be sharing that information with us, you know?
我觉得行得通 I-I-I think it's a good idea, Rick.
最坏的情况也就接着跑呗 Worst-case scenario we're back to running.
梦中六小时以后
感觉我们可以就这样一直躲下去耶 Wow, you know what? I mean, it looks like we could have just hid this whole time.
Rick 你真是太机智了 Boy, Rick, that was some good thinking.
谢谢 Morty Thanks, Morty.
偶尔能意见一致真是蛮好的 Yeah, it's nice to be on the same page every once in a while.
尽管跑 You can run...
但别想躲起来 But you can't hide!
太好了 Morty Oh, this is perfect, Morty.
看 他开始困了 Look at that. He's getting sleepy.
在过一会儿他就要休息了 Just a little bit longer before he calls it a day.
到时候我们就动手 That's when we make our move.
嗅嗅 我们没有恶意 Snuffles, we didn't mean you any harm!
这是个天大的误会 This is a huge misunderstanding.
爸 你要叫他雪球 Dad, he wants to be called Snowball.
我才不会这么叫呢 Well, I'm not calling him that.
太扯了 That's ridiculous.
你脾气不太好啊 Jerry You're being very aggressive, Jerry.
或许明天Scraps医生能动个手术帮你解决这个问题 Perhaps tomorrow Dr. Scraps will solve that problem with a bit of surgery.
你以为给我剪个头发就能让我屈服吗 You think you can control me with a haircut?
亲爱的 你回来的好早啊 Hi, Honey. You're home early.
今天过得怎么样啊 How was your day?
我不想说这个 I don't want to talk about... It!
当然当然 你什么时候想说过 Oh, of course. You never want to talk about it.
少来烦我 贱人 Get off my back, bitch!
有脾气别带回家里来 Out there. Not in here.
我知道 我知道 Yeah, I know, I know.
我不该冲着你和恐怖Brandon发脾气 I shouldn't take my anger out on you or Scary Brandon.
我爱你 Melissa I love you, Melissa.
我也爱你 Terry I love you, too, Terry.
Morty 太好了 Morty, this is perfect.
再来场恐怖爱爱他们就要睡觉了 然后我们就到他的梦里去 After a little scary coitus, they should be fast asleep and then we'll incept him.
恐怖Terry好像在做噩梦啊 Looks like Scary Terry's having a nightmare.
Rick 要多可怕的噩梦才能吓到恐怖Terry啊 Oh, boy, Rick. I can only imagine what horrible things must, you know, scare Scary Terry.
哦不 我上课要迟到了 贱人 Oh, no! I'm late to class, bitch!
哦不 我没穿裤子 Oh, no! I'm not wearing any pants!
Terry先生 你来告诉一下同学们 Ah, well, Mr. Terry, why don't you tell the whole class
当你追人经过一片南瓜田的时候应该说什么啊 the proper wordplay to use when one is chasing one's victim through a pumpkin patch?
呃 呃 "贱人" Oh... um... "Bitch."
你就想不出什么和南瓜有关系的双关吗 贱人 Oh, come on, Terry, you can't think of a pun involving pumpkins, bitch?
别这样对他 Hey, leave him alone!
没错 这纯粹是胡扯 Yeah, this is a bunch of bullcrap.
杀人的时候谁管你说什么双关呢 Who cares what stupid pun you make when you kill someone?
让他想说什么说什么不行吗 Why don't you let the poor guy say whatever he wants?
我才不会就这么站着让你们侮辱 Well, I never! I-I see no reason to stand here and take this.
你给自己太多压力了恐怖Terry You're putting too much pressure on yourself, Scary Terry.
你现在就已经非常吓人了 You know, I mean, y-you're perfectly scary enough as it is.
嘿 恐怖T Hey, yo, Scary T.
别担心你的裤子 哥们儿 Don't even trip about your pants... dawg.
我们这儿有一条 Here's a pair on us, fool.
噢 贱人 我都不知道该说什么了 Aww, bitch. I don't know what to say.
你什么都不用说 You don't need to say anything.
我们挺你 哥们儿 We got you, dawg.
你有我们呢 别担心 You're our boy, dawg. Don't even trip.
嘿 是你们啊 Oh, hey, it's you guys!
我好几年没见他这么放松了 I haven't seen him this relaxed in years.
你们需要什么尽管说 If you guys ever need anything, just say the word.
确实有一件事要请你帮忙 Terry As a matter of fact, Terry, there is something you could help us with.
*你逃不掉的* *"Q," "R," You won't get very far*
我一直就不喜欢这首歌 I always hated that song!
这两半就不该拼一起 贱人 These halves don't belong together, bitch!
性是神圣的 Sex is sacred!
叫你不给Morty Smith好成绩 贱人 This is because you don't give Morty Smith good grades, bitch!
我的个天啦 Holy crap! God damn!
我一定要给Morty打A 这是我自己的想法 I know one thing for sure I'm giving morty an "A" In math, and that's my idea.
是我自己想这么干的 That is an original thought.
这怎么回事 What the hell?
刚下刀山又进火海啊 Morty Out of the frying pan dot, dot, dot, huh, Morty?
发生什么了 Oh, man, what's going on?
有可能 Well, it's possible
你的狗狗有了自我意识 that your dog became self-aware
然后改进了认知增强装置 and made modifications on the cognition amplifier,
然后在认识到人类对他的种族压迫后 then turned on Jerry, Beth, and Summer after
对Jerry Beth和Summer动手了 learning about humanity's cruel subjugation of his species, but
不过你的想法也很有可能啦 Morty Your guess is as good as mine, Morty.
就因为聪明了嗅嗅居然变得这么狠心 I can't believe how mean snuffles got just because he's smart.
所以我才只愿意拿C This is why I choose to get C's
嘿 Beth Jerry Summer Psst, Beth, Jerry, Summer.
爸 Dad!
Rick Rick!
谢天谢地 Morty Oh, thank god, Morty.
不用谢 Oh, you're welcome.
好了 快走吧 All right, let's get out of here.
如果抓紧时间 我们还能在狗狗们全面占领世界之前 If we hurry we can set up camp in a sewer tunnel or something
在下水道之类的地方建个营地 before the dogs completely take over.
我们哪儿也不去 Whoa, whoa, whoa. We're not going anywhere.
这是我家 This is my house.
我不会抛弃它的 I'm not abandoning it.
都完了 Jerry It's all over, Jerry.
那些狗马上就要占领世界了 The dogs are on a path to total world domination.
不过至少他们不会在你地毯上撒尿了 But, hey, at least they know not to piss on your carpet, right?
等等 我有个主意 Wait a minute. I have an idea.
先生们 占用一下你们的时间 Gentlemen, a moment of your time.
看见了吗 See that?
你们的特制枪上都是我的尿 I'm peeing all over your special guns.
所以这些都是我的了 That means I own them.
坏人 坏 Bad person. Bad.
这招好厉害啊 Jerry Ooh, great plan, Jerry.
把男孩带来 Bring the boy to me.
你对我一直很好 Morty You were always kind to me, Morty.
所以我可以让你把睾丸留着 That's why I will leave you with your testicles.
从现在起 你是我最好的朋友 留在我身边 From now on, you will be my best friend and live by my side.
谢谢 嗅嗅 Th-thanks, snuffles.
阶段二开始 Begin phase two.
狗军占领东部沿海 战争仍在继续 Fighting continues as the dog army captures the Eastern seaboard.
显然人类统治的纪元将迎来了苦涩的终结 It appears clear at this time that the era of human superiority has come to a bitter end.
求求你别杀我 Please! Please don't kill me!
她在说什么 Bill What's she saying, Bill?
我觉得她在说"我爱千层面" I think she's saying, "I love lasagna."
human testicles 人睾丸
谢谢你 Fido Thank you, Fido.
Rick 我以为你死了 Rick! I thought you were dead!
不不不 我只是装死 No, no, no, I was just playing dead.
有好消息 Good news, though, Morty.
这一切马上就要结束了 This whole thing's gonna be over really soon.
啥 What?
这是个梦 Morty It's a dream, Morty.
我们在你的狗的梦里 We're in your dog's dream.
狗抓住我们的那天晚上 The night the dogs captured us,
你吓哭了 拉在了裤子里 然后我们都睡着了 after you cried and crapped your pants, we... we all went to sleep.
然后我用梦境植入装置把我们两个弄进了嗅嗅的梦里 Then I used my dream inceptors to put the two of us inside snuffles' dream.
但这都过了差不多一年了 But I-it's been like a whole year!
是六个小时 It's been six hours.
梦里的时间是现实时间的一百分之一 Dreams move one one-hundredth the speed of reality, and dog
而狗的时间是人的七分之一 Time is one-seventh human time.
这里过一天 外面一分钟 So, you know, every day here is like a minute.
就和《盗梦空间》一样 把人搞得很晕 而且很蠢 It's like "Inception," Morty, so if it's confusing and stupid,
这部人人爱的电影就这个样 then so is everyone's favorite movie.
可是我很喜欢这样的生活呀 Aw, man. I really liked this life.
不过至少我没有真的拉在裤子里吧 Well, at least I didn't really crap my pants.
不 这事儿是真的 在你睡着之前就拉了 No, no, that happened before you went to sleep, Morty.
你现在就睡在你的屎里呢 You're sleeping in your crap right now.
唯一一件确确实实发生了的事 Out of all the things that happened to you,
就是你拉在裤子里了 that was the only real thing that, you know, is that you crapped your pants.
简直一团糟 I mean, it's a mess out there.
还有些沾到我手上了 I got some on my hands, Morty,
然后我给弄到梦境植入器上了 还有一坨掉进了我的嘴里 And then I got it on the dream inceptor, and a piece fell in my mouth.
天啊 不是吧 Aw, man, geez! Seriously?
别管了 Morty Look, d-d-d-don't worry about it, Morty.
来把这个吃了 Here, here take these, Morty. Take these.
这些药能让我醒过来还是怎么的 Are these pills supposed to wake me up, or something?
差不多吧 Close.
这个会让你的肾功能停止 It's gonna make your kidneys shut down.
啥 What?!
这是为了我们的计划 Morty It's necessary for the plan, Morty.
别担心 哥们儿 Don't even trip, dawg.
情况很糟 雪球陛下 It's pretty bad, Emperor Snowball.
我们还需要做一次手术 We're gonna need to do another operation.
不惜一切 Anything.
不惜一切代价救回我的宝贝Morty Anything for my precious Morty.
作为您的会计师 我必须告诉您 Sir, as your accountant, I must advise you that
这些医疗支出会让您的财政到达岌岌可危的地步 these medical expenses are putting you in serious financial jeopardy.
您可能会失去您的帝国 You could lose your kingdom.
去他的帝国 斤斤计较的会计 To hell with my kingdom, bean counter.
我愿意牺牲这一切 来换得这个人类的健康和幸福 I would trade it all for my human's health and happiness.
你觉得他们会为我们做到这一步吗 Do you think they would have done this for us?
我们又不是他们 We are not them!
我们不是 他们 We are not... them.
召集军队 Assemble the troops.
我做了一个决定 I've made a decision.
占领人类世界 Taking over the human's world
只会造成更多的残忍与伤痛 will lead to nothing but more heartbreak, more cruelty.
所以我们决定去新世界建立一个智慧狗类的社会 Instead, we will go to a new world and colonize it with a society of intelligent dogs.
我们不会再犯人类的错误 One that will not make the same mistakes as humanity
并且会有强制宠物保险 and one where pet insurance will be mandatory.
我会想你的 雪球 I'm gonna miss you, Snowball.
你可以叫我嗅嗅 Morty You can call me Snuffles, Morty
我也会想你的 非常想念 and I'm going to miss you, too, very much.
Jerry Jerry?
抱歉 I'm sorry.
就和《老黄狗》的结局一样 It's just like the end of "Old Yeller."
你这么说是因为里面也有狗吧 Oh, Jerry. You mean because it had dogs in it.
一个智慧狗类居住的世界 Wow! A whole world populated by intelligent dogs.
我好想知道会是什么样啊 Rick I wonder what it'll be like, Rick.
我觉得肯定很棒 Morty I think it will be great, Morty.
可以发展成一个 You know, it's g I-I-I-I-it could be developed in-into
很好的全年龄向节目啊 a very satisfying project for people of all ages.
我每一集至少愿意看十一分钟 I mean, I'd watch it, Morty, for at least 11 minutes a pop.
说不定还能有分镜脚本 You know, may-maybe they'll do it board-driven.
这个想法很令人欣慰啊 Rick You know, that's a real comforting idea, Rick.
你知道什么呢 Morty What do you know, Morty?
你又知道啥呢 What do you know?
嗨 大家好 Hi, guys.
我是你们恐怖课的新老师 I'm your new teacher for scary class.
我叫恐怖Johnson My name is Scary Mr. Johnson.
其实吧 Uh, actually, you know what?
这是我爸的名字 你们干脆叫我恐怖Glenn好了 That's my dad's name, so why don't you just call me Scary Glenn, yeah?
我知道你们之前的老师 So, anyway, I understand your previous teacher
让你们学恐怖基本原理 was having you work on fundamentals of fear.
那是啥玩意儿啊 Which is... what is that?
要我说的话 You know? So, uh, here here's what I say
你啥也学不会 you can't learn anything
除非你学会放松 until you learn... how to chill.
这才叫做梦嘛 贱人 This is how you dream, bitch.
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