现钱,现钱,现金收骨头! Cash, cash, cash for your bones.
你觉得身上有多余的骨头？钱不够？联系我们！ Too many bones,not enough cash? Call Cashbone.
肋骨、头骨、脊椎骨！就算是你耳洞里面的小骨骨，我们也收！ Ribs, skulls, spines,even certain tiny ear bones.
大腿骨连着我们CashBone! The leg bone's connected to the Cashbone
喔..Nibbler又拉了粑粑啦 Aw, Nibbler made a bobo for Mama.
让我来用我的supey-dupey poopy scoopy来捡吧 I'll pick it up with my supey-dupey poopy scoopy.
核心磁场强度31度 Core magnetic field...31 microteslas.
不错 Nice.
温度 ... Temperature...
哇塞，这个岩浆的PI达到了一万度了（有些词不知道是什么） Whoa! The magma P.I. is 10,000 degrees Selleck.
打死你...(粤语,搞不懂为什么这样说，说你妈嗨还不错) (speaking Chinese)
Leela我在收集数据啊 Leela, I am collecting data.
你就不能仍在其他地方吗？ Could you dump that somewhere else?
不啊 Not really.
这可是高能量的暗物质啊 It's highly volatile dark matter...
还有些玉米 and some corn.
但是我明天要交论文啊！ But I'm presenting my thesis tomorrow
都没时间准备了 and I've barely had time to prepare.
胡说！ Nonsense.
你都当我的学生当了12年了 You've been my grad student for 12 years.
6年前都该毕业了 You were ready six years ago.
什么？我应该告诉过你了吧？ What?! I probably should have told you.
管他呢，最重要的是你明天一定要放松啊！ Anyway, the important thing is to be relaxed tomorrow.
你肯定？是啊 Are you sure? Yes.
该怎么放松就怎么放松吧 Do what you young people do to unwind.
兜个风 Take a joyride in your jalopy.
做个90后放松下 Wear a T-shirt and eat a fish stick.
去啊 Go!
好吧朋友们，让我们喝少少来帮助艾米放松吧 Okay, amigos, one teensy drink to help Amy relax.
干杯！ Hear, hear!
唉，我感觉还有点紧张 Hmm... I guess I'm still kind of nervous.
再来一杯让她放松放松吧 One more teensy drink to help Amy relax.
还紧张吗？ Still a little nervous?
她真是一个神经过敏症患者啊 She's a nervous wreck!
我虽然没有个男人 Well, I may not have a man,
但是我总算有你这个小笨笨 but at least I've got you, poopsie-doodle.
Leela我们聊下好吗？ Leela, it's time you and I had a talk.
聊下？你不能甩掉我啊！ A talk?! You can't break up with me.
你是我的宠物 You're my pet.
我爱你就像爱我自己 As much as I enjoy being
但是显然你感情错位了 the object of your misplaced affections,
我起码也是一个渴望充满智慧谈话的 I am also a highly sophisticated being
高级生命体 who longs for intelligent conversation.
啊我的小宝贝是不是受到什么刺激了? Aw, is shnookums not feeling "shtimuwated"?
退一万步讲 An understatement to say the least.
你该对我尊敬些了 It's time you treated me with respect.
你想让我把你当成地位平等的伙伴？那好 If you want to be treated like a fellow crew member, fine,
零花钱没了 but no more purse rides
你那身漂亮可爱的男童海军衣服也还给我 and no more dressing you up in your cute little sailor suit.
我不是一直告诉你吗？这是我正宗的星舰军服 I keep telling you, that's my real naval uniform.
去你那还是去我那？ Your place or mine?
两个都行，这里最好 Both. But first, this place.
XXOO... Ooh... oh, my...
（水平有限,翻译不出，你懂的） Ooh! Room for one more?
我不是定的7:15 I thought I set you for 7:15.
抱歉，我昨晚和BenderXXOO了 Sorry... I hooked up with Bender last night.
那个兄弟骑在我按钮上 Dude was all over my snooze button.
但是我的博士论文考试就是十分钟后了！在火星上！ But my doctoral exam is in ten minutes... on Mars!
Kif，是你在地板上说话吗？ Kif, did you yack on the floor?
是啊 Yes, I did.
应试者在哪啊？Farnsworth Where's your candidate, Farnsworth?
我今天有大把的人来等着我羞辱呢 I have a long list of students to humiliate today.
你迟到了，天哪 You're late, Miss Wong. Oh, God,
这就像是噩梦 this is like one of those nightmares.
来，穿上我的实验袍 Here, take my lab coat.
让我来介绍你的考试委员会成员 Allow me to introduce your examining committee
按照凶残程度排序 in descending order of grumpiness.
Ogden.Wernstrom 教授 Professor Ogden Wernstrom.
Wernstrom
应用物理学教授 Downtown Professor of Applied Physics
Ethan "泡泡糖"Tate. Ethan "Bubblegum" Tate.
我从你的简历获知你是人马座的？ I see by your curriculum vitae that you're a Sagittarius.
Fischerpreis教授 And Professor Fischerpreis Schpeeknschpell.
母牛叫 ... The cow says...
他50年前证明了 He proved that 50 years ago,
他一直做这方面的研究 and he's been coasting on it ever since.
我就是受人尊敬的Morris Katz教授 I am the esteemed Professor Morris Katz,
你在浪费我的时间 and you are wasting my time.
开始 Proceed.
想一下，如果你 ... Imagine, if you will...
天哪 Oh, God.
一个巨大的天体发动机 A gigantic spherical generator,
可提供无尽的能源供应 one that could provideunlimited energy
因为它本质上做着永恒的运动 because it's essentially in perpetual motion.
女士，你是不是醉了 Young lady, have you been drinking?
恩好吧，是的但是没关系 Well, yes, but that's not "revelate."
我在说关于地球的事情 I'm talking about Earth.
地球发动机 Earth's the generator.
啊... Baa.
假使这个篮球 Suppose this basketball
就是地球 is the whole world.
很多年轻在上面的城市里面 To many young men in the inner city, it is.
当他旋转时，提供一个巨大的磁场作用 As it spins, it's producing an enormous magnetic field.
如果我们能利用他发电 If we could use that field to generate electric current,
我们就能驾驭地球... we could actually harness the Earth's rotational ener-ener...
是啊，（不知道什么意思） Yes, tapping the earth's ener-kerchoo.
继续 Go on.
抱歉，我对猫过敏 Sorry, I'm super allergic to cats.
Katz教授，您介不介意 ... ? Professor Katz,would you mind...?
王小姐，我对什么都介意 Miss Wong, I I mind everything.
你只需要让地球偏离轴心 ... You just need to polarize the Earth's core with a huge...
静电... static charge...
用超导材料来完成 ... by ratcheting superconductive wire down into...
对不起 Sorry.
够了！ Enough.
委员会现在投票赞成或反对 The committee members will now vote yea or nay.
否 Nay.
靠，否 Hell, nay.
马叫"博士学位玩完了" The horse says "Doctorate denied."
好了Amy It's okay, Amy.
我也没有一个想象力学位 I don't have a fancy degree either,
但是，今天我也成了一个包裹投递界的一个杰出的人物 but today I'm a prominent boy in the package delivery field.
好了，现在我是一个完全平等的队员了 Now that I am a full and equal member of the crew,
我对我的忠诚和睿智做出保证 I pledge my loyalty, my perspicacity,
我敢说，我的友谊 and dare I say it, my friendship.
Leela，让他闭嘴 Leela, muzzle that skunk.
我们不能让这么可爱、毛茜茜的小东西... We can't stop a meeting for some cute, fuzzy, little...
嘿，一个好可爱的猫咪 Hey, look, a kitty cat.
又是你 You again?
走开，你个脏东西 Get away, you mangy ball of histamines.
你让一个猫咪独自承受孤单 You leave kitty cat alone.
拜托，我尽量让我们生意兴隆 People, please, I'm trying to run a business,
让我拿这个小猫咪 so I get to hold kitty.
不，我来.. No, me.
奥，它的肛门像个星星 Aw, its anus looks like an asterisk.
毛茸茸船长 Captain Fuzzy Toes
报道. reporting for duty...I mean, cutie..
我最好的朋友就是穿着那个制服死的 My best friend died in that uniform.
我讨厌这个猫 I hate that cat!
如果我有一个喷雾剂的话 If I had a spray bottle,
我肯定喷它一下 I'd give him such a spritzing.
我告诉你 ... I'll tell you one thing...
它肯定有什么动机 nothing acts that cute without some ulterior motive.
啊？要换尿布了？ Aw, you want your dipey changed?
我们必须监视它的一举一动 We'll have to watch its every move.
婴儿爽身粉谢谢 Powder, please.
我的结论：这是个可爱的猫咪 Here's my new theory: That is one adorable cat.
我猜我是嫉妒他 I guess I was just jealous.
我还是想念我是Leela的宠物的时光 I do miss being Leela's shnookums.
我希望向她道歉，我还是想做她的宠物 I'm going to apologize and hope for a pity pet.
好的 Yes, my lord.
Amy和Nibbler是巨大的威胁 Amy and Nibbler are a "tewwible thweat."
她们必须做节育手术变成阴阳人 They must be spayed and neutered, "wespectivewy."
Meow-meow, meow-meow, meow-meow, meow-meow
Meow-meow, meow-meow, meow-meow, meow-meow..
Meow-meow, meow-meow.
这个猫是个魔鬼 The cat is evil.
我们已经证明了 We have proof.
它可以迷惑人 It was summoning a saucer.
它当然需要...笨蛋 Of course it wanted a saucer, you idiot...
a saucer of "dewicious cweam."
笨蛋，我说的不是奶油的问题 You fool, this isn't about the cream.
It's pwonounced "cweam"
我在抚摸她 I'm petting mine down to the bone.
看看它可爱的毛 Just stwoke its fluffy fur.
抓抓它可爱的下巴 Scwatch its flubby chin.
（不知所谓） Fweeble its fwooby pwow.
爱抚她，爱抚她 ... Pet it, pet it...
爱抚她 ... Pet it, pet it...
爱抚她、爱抚她、爱抚她 Pet it, pet it... No, no!
爱抚她、爱抚她、爱抚她... Pet it, pet it...
那个猫怎么需要那个多的毛线 What do cats need with that much yarn and cobalt?
她们在楼下干什么 They're doing something downstairs.
我们去看看 We've got to find out what.
你们干什么？非猫一族？ Where do you think you're going, No-cat?
地下室 Uh, the basement.
我想我吧我的曲棍球杆忘在哪了 I think I left the air-hockey table on.
没有一个猫，你那都别想去 Without a cat, you aren't going nowhere.
你能不能告诉我们下面在干什么 Can you at least tell us what's going on down there?
我肯定我们不是在搞什么阴谋 We're certainly not building something sinister,
如果你是在暗示的话 if that's what you're implying.
来 Bender Now, come on, Bender,
阴谋不会自己建立的 something sinister won't build itself.
Katz教授的姓是Katz Professor Katz' last name is Katz.
你认为他是不是有什么关于猫的事情 Do you think he has something to do with these cats?
推论显而易见 The conclusion is as inescapable as it is moronic.
我看我们去拜访他下 I say we pay him a visit,
如果他不说 and if he won't talk to us,
他也会对Smith和 Wesson说的 he'll talk to Smith & Wesson...
或者我手上的头骨融化器 or perhaps Consolidated Head Melter.
门上告示：滚开！ Please leave before entering
Katz教授，请给我们个解释 Professor Katz, we want answers.
警告你，我要变可爱的话 I warn you, if I have to get cute,
它就要变丑 it's gonna get ugly.
他死了！等等 He's dead! Wait!
这些绳子干啥用的 What are these strings on his lap?
靠... What the...?
他是个傀儡！ He's one of those dog-operated puppets
这些刚好方便猫来使用 that's been adapted for use by a cat!
我的博士学位就是坏在那个猫手里！？ So I had my doctorate denied by that fuzz ball?!
臭猫咪 Bad kitty!
他们真的按照我的理论制造了 They actually built the planetary ratchet
星际齿轮！ from my thesis!
Uh-oh.
靠... What the...?
好吧，看看尊贵的我碰到了谁 Well, look what the me dragged in.
你能说话？！ You can talk!
你也能说话？！ You can talk?
真是讽刺啊！ How ironic!
两个超智慧生命 Two hyper-intelligent beings
都假装是别人的宠物！ both pretending to be simple house pets.
你知道哦啊Obliteron吗？ Say, do you know Obliteron?
他假装成老鼠... 结果 He pretends to be a hamster, but...
哇，真是不错啊~ Yeah, that's really great.
告诉我们这到底是怎么回事？！ Could you please tell us what's going on?!
什么？偶，正好 What? Oh, right.
我的同胞和我是 You see, my associates and I are
是来自于一个叫ThuBan的恒星系的第九颗行星 from the ninth planet of the star you call Thuban.
很久以前，那里简直就是天堂 Long ago, life there was ideal.
太阳提供源源不断的温暖阳光，茫茫长夜适合困觉 The sun provided plenty of warm, dozy light.
鸡鲑鱼悠闲的漫步 The Chicken-Salmon roamed free.
结果灾难发生了 Yet disaster loomed.
我们的星球的转动慢慢停止了 Our planet's rotation was gradually slowing.
刚开始看起来这个挺不错的 At first, it seemed beneficial.
漫长的黑夜正适合睡觉 Long dark nights for sleeping,
漫长的大白天也正好睡觉 long sunny days for sleeping.
但是这时天气变得炎热 But then, it got too hot.
或者太冷 And too cold.
于是我们的科学家出动了 Our top scientists went to work.
结果他们发现了一个带有可以让我们的星球恢复的磁场的 At last, they located a planet with the necessary orientation
星球 and magnetic field to harness its rotational energy.
地球！ Earth!
当然！ Indubitably.
我们称她为蓝蓝亮晶晶 Although we call it Blue-Blue Shiny Ball.
公元前3500
在古代的埃及 In the area now known as Egypt,
我的臣民为我们建造了巨大的锥形发射天线 my people constructed a giant, semi-octahedral antenna
来发射地球的旋转磁场到ThuBan星系去 to beam Earth's rotational energy to Thuban.
金字塔？！ The Great Pyramid at Giza!
对 Yes.
古埃及人把我们当神 The Egyptians viewed us as gods,
讽刺的是，这真是我们的失败之处 but ironically,that was our downfall.
过多的懒散生活使我们堕落 They pampered us with feasts most fancy
让我们身体变得娇贵 and vittles most tender.
我们变胖成了宠物 We grew fat and domesticated.
几千年过去了 Thounds of years passed,
我们的家乡差不多完了 and our home world was nearing total destruction.
闭嘴！ Shut up!
但是拯救我们 But the technology
星球的科技已经遗失了 to save our planet was lost.
丢失了 Lost, that is,
知道我听到你在火星大学的 until I heard you speak
演讲 at Mars University.
于是你就说我的理论是垃圾？ So you called my thesis a fat sack of barf,
你还盗用了它？ and then you stole it?
欢迎到学术界（暗讽学术界盗用成风） Welcome to academia.
他打算吸走我们地球的转动磁场力！ He intends to siphon off Earth's rotational energy!
地球将停止转动 ... Earth will come to a stop, and...
半数的地球人哥们将被煮熟，另外一半就被冻成肉干！ Half of you will cook, and half of you will freeze.
地球就会像McDLT(暗讽麦当劳,的确麦当劳吃热的喝冰镇可乐) Earth will be one big McDLT.
我们去年才拉到赞助 We just got that commercial last year.
是吗。小聪明？ Oh, yeah, smarty paws?
你的确建造了这个机器 You may have built the ratchet,
但是你没有4000公里长的超导体的话 but you can't reach the core
不可能达到地心的 without 4,000 miles of superconducting wire.
那些毛球！ The ball of yarn!
安静 Quite.
就算这样，你还是需要一个巨大的静电 Even so, you'd still need
发生器 a tremendously powerful static charge
来触发这个过程 to trigger the process.
你曾经和猫打过交道吗（意思就是你真是我肚子里的蛔虫） Ever had a cat rub up against you?
如果你是在讨好我，我没兴趣 If you're propositioning me,I'm not interested.
我说的正是这个发生器 I'm talking about the charge generated
当五万只猫同时抓一个表面 when 50,000 felines rub against a single surface.
教授 Professor?
很快地球就会停止转动啦 Soon the world will come to a stop,
没人能阻止我 and there's nothing you can do to stop it.
地球转动停止 The stopping of the world, that is.
无法停止的 It's unstoppable.
抱歉 Excuse me.
地球满上就要停止转动了 The Earth h h is coming to a st!
看着我们别停下 Keep your eyes on the kitties and push!
这些星级猫好像是通过某种催眠的方式 These space cats seem to be employing some form
来控制他们 of hypnotic hyper-cuteness.
好吧，我们来比试下 Well, two can play at that game.
Nibbler，我的小宝呗 Nibbler? Poopsie-doodle?
Winkles，快表演秀啊 Mr. Winkles, Smudge-Smudge.
快，一起跳舞 Quick, dance with each other!
(乐声响起) (lively folk music plays)
哇 Aw!
妈的，算你们狠 Damn, they are good.
马上我们就成功了 We're coming to a full stop.
所有猫族，就位！ All cats, to your posts!
绝命海滩派对，场景一 Catastrophe Beach Party... Scene One.
插入灾难效果 开始！ Cue disaster effects and... action!
停！ Cut!
那个临时演员看镜头 That extra looked at the camera.
我们要再来次了 We'll have to do it again.
现在开始把你们星球的能量 And now to transfer your planet's rotational energy
传送到我们的星球 to my home world.
好。现在开始庆祝吧 Well, now, this calls for a celebration.
妈的我身上怎么这么多猫毛 What's all this cat hair on my sweater?
我肚子里怎么都是沙？ Why am I full of sand?
（不知道什么意思） And Tootsie Rolls?
你们都被那些可恨的猫下了符咒了 You were all under the spell of those obnoxious space cats!
享受下被太阳烤焦的滋味吧 Enjoy being broiled alive by the sun,
还有剩下的烂摊子 and also the dead bird we've left in your slipper.
快，如果我们反转这个机器 Quickly! If we turn the ratchet the other way,
我们可能可以重新让地球转起来 perhaps we can restart the Earth!
卡住了！ It won't turn.
用力！Bender Push harder, Bender!
没办法啊！ I can't do it
你应该叫我的堂兄 Turner（转动者，Bender意思为折弯者） You should have called my cousin, Turner.
在理论上 Even in theory,
这个机器只能转动一个方向 the device can only applyforce in one direction.
打开个窗好吗？ Can someone open a window?
太热了 It's getting a little warm in here.
好点了吗 Is that better?
妈的，太热了 Shmeezus, it's hot!
为什么我发明了这个可怕的装置啊！ Why'd I have to invent that awful device?
Amy，科技本身不分好与坏 Amy, technology isn't intrinsically good or evil.
关键在于怎么用 It's how it's used.
就像死亡射线 Like the death ray.
可能你是对的 Maybe you're right.
我向科技始终是要进步的 I guess science has to keep pushing forward
等等 ... with the hope that...
接着往前推！ Pushing forward!
教授，我知道怎么让地球重新转起来！ Professor, I know how to restart the Earth!
哪里可能从几句话里 You can't suddenly know something
就能怎么让地球重新转起来的方法 just by assembling a committee of words.
我将重新召集你的学位评审委员会 I'll assemble your committee!
这个齿轮不能反转 The ratchet won't turn backwards,
但是如果我们接着让它正转呢 but what if we kept pushing it forward?
地球就能重新转动了！ Earth would start turning again!
对啊！ ... 转错方向了 Yes... the wrong direction!
那么 So?
奥 Oh.
女士们先生们 Gentlemen, ladies,
我们来让地球转起来吧！ let's get this globe trotting.
行了！ It's working!
再快点 Just a little faster!
我们已经使全力了 But we're plotzing here!
看着Nibbler吧！ Then look at Nibbler!
哇 Aw!
虽然地球这个社会很低贱 On the whole, Earth society is worthless.
但是他们的那个古毛毯还是不错的 But they do have these things called antique rugs
在上面撒尿还是不错的 that are great for peeing on.
太精彩了 Good show.
虽然是在反方向 And though the world is now spinning
转动，好歹还凑合 in the wrong direction, it's good enough.
干得不错Amy. Well done, Amy.
我荣幸的授予你物理学 I'm honored to begrudgingly present with your Ph.D.
博士学位 In applied physics.
还有，运动精神奖章 Also, some kind of sportsmanship award
我已经有了 I had in my glove compartment.
哈！我终于完成我的学位了（12年啊！I 服了U） Yay! I'm finally done with school!
人才市场怎么样？ How's the job market?
Ruff. Ruff.
祝贺你，王博士 Congratulations,Dr. Wong!
祝贺你！ Congratulations.
请允许上船 Permission to come aboard?
勉强可以，小坏坏 Granted, shnookums.