本集绝无死狗出现
Zindy 亲爱的 不敢相信我们真的见上面了 Zindy, my darling, I can't believe we're finally going to meet in person.
可惜只是匆匆一面 小甜饼 It won't be long, Johnnycakes.
我的星际巴士四点半就到了 My space-bus gets in at 4:30.
那正好能赶上Chizzler的"吃到撑自助餐" Just in time for the all-you-can-stand buffet at Chizzler.
回头见 See you soon.
那是谁啊 Zoiberg? Zoidberg, what is that?
我跟那位可爱的生物已经视频约会四年了 That is the delightful creature I've been video-dating for the past four years.
快一棍子打死它 Hit it with a stick!
今晚 美梦即将成真 Tonight is a dream come true...
我俩要在一个真实存在的地方来一场真实的约会 A real live date in a physical place that exists!
我这就回去 在我家跟她碰面 I just have to go straighten up in case we end up at my place.
看啊 我家都打扫干净了 除了一个地方 There. My home's all clean, except for one part.
里头 The inside.
我敢肯定以那恶心的外星怪物的标准里面还算不错了 Aw, I'm sure it's fine by the standards of a gross alien monster.
难说 靠边站 哥带了除虫轰弹 (蟑螂轰弹) - Nope.- Step aside, people. I got bug bombs.
Bender 等一下 臭虫们被轰出来以后难道不会跑去别的地方? Bender, wait. Won't the bugs just run out and infest someplace else?
- 比如我们公司里? - 那又不该我管 - Like our building? - Not my problem.
手榴弹规避 Fire in the hole!
真不错 Amazing!
你跳得像年轻时候身上住了只蟑螂的金凯利一样好 You move like a young, roach-infested Gene Kelly.
我的天哪 是Randy Oh, my God, it's Randy!
正是在下 我在为公园与公共娱乐闭门组织一场踢踏舞比赛 Damn right, and I'm organizing a tap-dance contest for the Parks and Rec Department.
请你一定要参赛 不然我可要自杀了 好吗? If you don't enter, I'll just kill myself, okay?
- 好啊 - 不 等一下 - Okay. - No, wait!
我 老Bender 参加舞蹈比赛? Me, little old Bender, in a dance contest?
这是为了给社区… It's a way for the community to...
我终于可以实现成为一名伟大的踢踏舞者的全新梦想了 At last, a chance to realize my brand-new dream of being the greatest tap dancer...
名扬天下 In all the world!
也就三个街区范围内 Well, in a three-block radius.
永载史册 Of all time!
你好啊 老板 Greetings, merchant.
我想买点漂亮而且便宜的东西给一位同样如此的女士 I need something beautiful and cheap for a lady who is one of those things.
我这里最便宜的就是雏菊了 六块钱一束 The cheapest thing I have is a bouquet of daisies for six dollars.
太棒了 我花三块钱买半束 Perfect! I'll take half a bouquet of daisies for three dollars.
这花剪太钝了 Ah, these flower shears are so dull.
城里稍微锋利点的剪子我一把都买不起 And I'm already in debt to every knife sharpener in town.
请让我来 Allow me.
谢谢你 Oh, thank you.
您的女朋友真是个幸运的姑娘 That girlfriend of yours is one lucky lady.
我会把她宠上天 I'm gonna snip her off her feet.
Zindy 从这里看你更漂亮了 Zindy! You're even more beautiful from a distance.
小甜饼 Johnnycakes.
我的天 这是什么鬼味道? Good God, what's that horrible stench?
味道? 可能是这个臭烘烘的车站的味道 Stench? Uh, that's probably this stinky bus station maybe.
来吧 我们去找个惠风和畅的地方白头偕老 Come, let's go someplace well-ventilated and grow old together.
好多了 Ah, much better.
好像更臭了 像开在潜水艇里的漫展的味道 It's even worse. It's like comic-con in a submarine.
要死啦 味道是从你身上散出来的 Oh, oh, my God. The smell's coming from you.
什么? 这个 这是人家的体香啦 What, that? That's just my personal musk.
你一定会喜欢上的 我就很喜欢 You'll learn to love it; I know I did.
抱歉 Zoiberg 我不能再见你了 I'm sorry, Zoidberg, I can't see you anymore.
情况有变 Something's come up.
是我要吐了 It's vomit.
我要退款 I'd like to return these for a refund.
别担心 它们还是全新的 Don't worry, they're unused.
抱歉 Oh, I'm sorry.
我做这种小生意可退不起货啊 I get so little business, I can't afford refunds.
不知道这个地方是不是有什么问题 I don't know what's wrong with this location.
我明白了 I understand.
请别哭了 我可受不了看着生命体承受痛苦 Please don't cry. I can't stand to see a living thing feel pain.
你是有生命的 对吧 You are a living thing, right?
嗯哼 我现在能得到退款了吗? Mm-hmm. Can I have a refund now?
这是一把枪刺刀 This here's a bayonet.
一把奇葩的半枪半刀的家伙 It's some kind of kooky half-gun, half-knife.
赶紧给我清空收款机 Now, empty out the register!
请别拿塑料袋 And no bag, please.
我很爱护环境 I care about the environment.
我这儿只有一把破旧的三块钱零钱 都是你的了 I have three dollars in moldy pennies. It's all yours.
你可真大方 That's generous of you.
你休想 大混蛋先生 Oh, no you don't, Mr. Big Jerk.
我活着也没什么指望了 所以我不介意告诉你这些零钱是我的 I have nothing to live for, so I don't mind telling you those pennies are mine.
你还不明白么? Don't you get it?
我是个疯子 I'm crazy!
继续啊 我不在乎会再发生什么 Go ahead, I don't care what happens anymore.
下手啊 朝我脑袋上砍 Do it; Bash my head in!
那是什么 芥子气? What is that, mustard gas?
这是非法的啊 That ain't legal.
你没听说过日内瓦公约么? Ain't you heard of no Geneva convention?
真是帅呆了 That was amazing.
你可真是勇敢而又节俭 Oh, you were so brave and frugal.
对不起 别打我 I'm sorry! Don't hit me!
我喜欢你打我的方式 但我不明白... Ooh, I like the way you hit. But I don't get it...
我遇到的大多数女人只要一靠近我就都崩溃了 Most women I've met can't even stand next to me without collapsing.
那些女人都有什么毛病? What's wrong with those women?
额 她们中的一些确实没有腿 Well, some of them didn't have legs.
但问题不在于她们 在于我 But it's not them; It's me.
我该怎么跟你说呢? How do I put this delicately?
我比妓院里的厕所还味儿 I'm smellier than a whorehouse's outhouse.
真是生动得可怕 That's terribly vivid.
但对我来说没关系 我生下来就没有嗅觉 Doesn't matter to me, though. I was born with no sense of smell.
真的? Really?
我叫Marianne My name's Marianne.
你好啊 Hello, you.
我喜欢你的垃圾箱 I like your dumpster.
谢谢你 Thank you.
上一位房客是个非常有名的浣熊 The previous tenant was a very prominent raccoon.
我记得 I remember.
他被压路机给压残可真是太糟糕了 Too bad he got partially run over by that steamroller.
我能吻你吗? Can I kiss you?
先让我掐下自己以确定我没在做梦 First, let me pinch myself to make sure I'm not dreaming.
哦哟 我忘了我是一个大螃蟹了 Ouch! I forgot I was a giant crab!
欢迎 粉丝们 Welcome, fans!
我是Randy 这次踢踏盛宴的协调人 I'm Randy, coordinator of this tap-dance-a-palooza.
Randy Randy!
经过数周的搜寻 我很荣幸为大家介绍 After weeks of searching, I'm proud to introduce
这五位愿意参加比赛的选手 the five people willing to participate!
Tonya Bender Greg 某种团型粘液怪和Petunia Tonya, Bender, Greg, some kind of blob monster and Petunia.
你们听到的额外劈啪声是我屁股发出来的 The extra clicking you'll hear is gonna be my hip.
大家请注意 这位小女生有颗美丽心灵 FYI, this little lady has a heart condition.
她总能笑对人生 She's always stealing them.
另外 她患有严重的心脏病 Also, she has a serious heart condition.
我六岁了 伦家最喜欢踢踏舞了 I'm six years old, and tap dancing is my favoritest thing.
虽然这对我的起搏器来说并不是好事 Even if it's not good for my pacemaker.
这起搏器的质量可真好 That is one quality pacemaker.
你们剩下的这些人也放弃吧 因为我会得到... The rest of you might as well give up now, because I'm gonna take home the...
我的大奖是啥? Hey, what's my grand prize gonna be?
没有奖品 Dorothy Oh, there's no prize, Dorothy.
除非你把获胜的满足感当做奖品 Unless you count the satisfaction of winning.
那我也要 It will be mine.
总之 恃强凌弱在工作场所是不可接受的 也是绝不能容忍的 In conclusion, bullying in the workplace is unacceptable and will not be tolerated.
让开 肥仔 我要练习 Bender: Out of my way, fatty! I'm practicing.
朋友们 来见见我的新女友 Marianne Friends, I'd like you to meet my new lady, Marianne.
这里肯定有蹊跷 她看起来很正常 What's the catch? She looks normal.
她不是全息投影 She's not a hologram.
也不是机器奴隶 Not a robo-slave.
我们放弃 We give up.
你们可真奇怪 You guys are weird.
我得去摆花摊了 免得炸丸子的那家伙抢了我的地儿 I have to go open my flower stand before the falafel guy takes my spot,
但见到你们很高兴 but it was great to meet you.
一会儿见 蟹黄糕 See you later, crab cakes.
Zoidburg医生 她真不错啊 Dr. Zoidberg, she's great.
她是我这辈子遇见的最好的奇遇 She's the best thing that ever happened to me.
我们在我的垃圾箱里爱爱 度过了美妙的一晚 We had a wonderful night of lovemaking in my dumpster.
我希望她采取了保护措施 I hope she used protection.
无意冒犯 但Zoidberg Uh, no offense, Zoidberg but,
她怎么没被你那能让人臭的晕眩的气味给逼疯? how was she not driven to madness by your mind-altering stench?
因为啊 朋友们 她没有嗅觉 Because, my friends, she has no sense of smell.
- 我明白了 - 这就说得通了 -Oh, I get it. -That explains it.
这是人生中头一次 我真正感到了开心 For the first time in my life, I'm truly happy.
但我想她没得治却是太可惜了 It's just too bad for her there's no cure, I assume.
其实有得治 Oh, but there is.
一位高明的医生可以实施鼻移植手术 A skilled surgeon could perform a nose transplant.
你说得对 Oh, you're right.
作为一位著名的耳鼻喉科大夫 我就可以做这个手术 And I, as a renowned ear, nose and blowhole Doctor, could do the operation.
你疯了? 如果她有了嗅觉 她就能闻着你了 Are you nuts? If she could smell, she'd smell you.
你们的关系肯定会立刻玩完 Your relationship would be over faster than you could say...
听黄头发Joe的吧 Listen to orange Joe.
你绝不能让这姑娘知道还有这么好的手术 You must never let the girl know of this wonderful surgery.
我不知道 Oh, I don't know.
这似乎对Marianne不公平 It doesn't seem fair to Marianne.
但是另一方面 我可能已经离不开她了 But on the other claw, maybe I can't live without her.
所以你说得对 So you're right.
我绝不能告诉她 I can never tell her.
你做的是对的 You're doing the right thing.
今天比赛就要开始了 Today, the competition begins.
在整个夏天 Over the course of the summer,
我们将在每周淘汰一名参赛选手 We'll be eliminating one contestant each week,
"我们"指的是我自己 And by "we," I mean "me."
应对挑战吧 宝贝们 Deal with it, you babies!
战斗开始吧 Let the battle begin.
好的 在那些练普拉提瑜伽的纳粹踏着正步占领房间之前 (踢踏盛宴) Okay, before those pilates nazis come goose-stepping in to take the room
有请入围下周冠军争夺赛的选手 Bender和Tonya Here are the finalists For next week's championship: Bender and Tonya.
我只是想得到快乐 因为跳舞是快乐的 I just want to have fun because dancing is fun
而我喜欢跳舞 And I like dancing.
我要好好的教训教训你 小女孩 I'm gonna kick your ass, little girl.
送给你 我可爱的小酥卷 For you, my lovely rugelach.
谢谢你 Thank you.
这是帝王栀子 It's gardenia imperialis.
你能用它来泡茶 You can brew it into a tea
如果你喜欢严重的胃痉挛的话 If you like severe stomach cramps.
真聪明 Such a smart one.
你对花真是了如指掌 You know everything about flowers.
除了它们的花香 Everything but how they smell.
请给我描述一下它的气味 Please describe it to me.
就像是涂有香草和蜂蜜的夏天 Uh, it's like summer with a dab of vanilla and honey
或者是浇上肉汁的冬天 Or maybe winter with some gravy on it.
如果我能闻到花香 我愿付出所有 I'd give anything to be able to smell a flower like that.
Marianne 我的挚爱 我从来没见过任何人 Marianne, my love, I've never known anyone
像你这样希望闻到气味 Who wanted to smell so badly.
也许有办法能让你闻到气味 And there's a way maybe you can.
真的吗? 什么办法? Really? How?
在医生的世界里有种叫做鼻移植的东西 We have in the doctor world something called a nose transplant.
我能给你做一个手术 I can give you a surgery,
手术完成后 你就能闻到气味了 And when it's done, you'll be able to smell.
所有的气味 Everything.
Zoidberg 我想要一个你能找到的最大的鼻子 Oh, zoidberg, I want the biggest nose you can find.
伙计 你晋级决赛了 Dude, you made the finals.
恭喜 Congrats.
你已经取得了这么多 You've accomplished so much more
我们大部分人都懒得做的成就 Than most of us would bother to.
是的 但我还没有做完 Yeah, but I'm not done yet.
我有一个万无一失的计划以保证 I got a foolproof plan to make sure
我把冠军带回家 I go home the champ.
你要在你的帽子上加上闪光亮片? You're gonna put sequins on your hat?
看见那个储物柜了吗? See that locker?
Tonya把她的踢踏舞鞋放在那儿 Tonya keeps her tap shoes in there.
所以在她跳舞之前 So, right before she dances,
我溜进去把生锈的大头钉放鞋里面 I'll sneak in and put rusty tacks in them.
她跳的越卖力 流血越多 The harder she dances, the more she bleeds.
真是好计策 Seems like a solid plan.
什么? 这是我所听过的最可怕的事 What? It's the most horrifying thing I've ever heard!
这倒没错 That's true.
还有更狠的呢 Well, it gets worse.
等到Tonya因为失血过多而退出比赛 Once tonya drops out due to blood loss,
我就绑架她的父母 逼迫他们看着 I kidnap her parents and make them watch
我用这大剪刀减掉她的头发 While I cut off her hair with these hedge clippers.
不准你碰那个天使一根毫毛 Don't you lay a hand on that angel.
天使? 我曾通过她的双眼看穿了她的灵魂 Angel? I've looked into her eyes and seen her soul.
她是个怪物 She's a monster.
你疯了 You're insane.
过来 Fry 我们走 Come on, fry, let's go.
好的 再见 Bender Okay. See you, bender.
冠军是我的 机器人 The championship's mine, robot.
为什么? 为什么? Why? Why?
什么事我还没做呢就得到这种报应? What did I not do yet to deserve this?
你给Marianne安一个新鼻子真是个高尚的行为 Aw, I think it's noble of you to give marianne a new nose.
是的 她将会永远感激你的 Yeah, she'll be forever grateful
站在上风口的某个地方 From somewhere upwind.
没错 她闻到我的气味后我们的关系就会结束了 True, our relationship will end when she smells my odor.
但你知道更糟糕的是什么吗? But you know what would really stink?
是Marianne在她的一生中都不知道 If marianne spent her whole life never knowing
她自己的花的芳香 The beautiful scent of her own flowers.
Zoidberg医生 救命 Dr. Zoidberg, help!
Bender? 你的腿怎么啦? Bender? What happened to your leg tube?
我被一个小女孩揍了 I got beat up by a little girl.
求你了 修好我的膝盖好让我 Please, fix my knee so I can get revenge
在踢踏舞决赛上报仇雪恨 At the tap dance championship.
我没时间 机器人 I don't have time for this, robot.
给 自己包扎吧 Here, patch yourself up
用这个玩具医疗包 (猴子用绷带) With this medicinal wacky pack.
是时候了 It's time.
我拿到了一个捐献的鼻子 I got a donor nose.
击剑学会发生了一起事故 There was an accident at the fencing academy.
击中得分 Touché
很快就会结束的 我的挚爱 It'll all be over soon, my love.
我可以... May I have...
求你最后一吻吗? One last kiss?
以后的亲吻会更多的唷 Oh, there will be lots more.
是是 会更多... Yes, lots.
Amy护士 上麻醉 Nurse Amy, the anesthesia.
待会儿闻你哟 Smell you later.
她睡着了 She's out.
那我们开始这个高难度手术吧 Then let's begin this delicate procedure.
好 舞迷们 请用最热烈的掌声欢迎两位决赛选手 (踢踏盛宴) Okay, dance maniacs, let's have a big hand for our finalists!
激萌小妹Tony和残酷无情的谁家那老谁 Cute little Tonya and mean old what's-his-name.
马到功成哦 Bender Break a leg, Bender.
哎呀 看样子你是马失前蹄呢 Oops, looks like you already did.
你真是个心狠手辣的小妖孽 You are an evil, heartless troll.
这样说来 其实我们挺有共同点的 So, actually, we have a lot in common.
换个环境 咱俩说不定是朋友 In another life, we could've been friends.
别做梦了 你个垃圾桶脸 No chance, garbage-can face.
准备大开眼界吧 今天我们要试试 Brace yourselves because we're gonna try something
大家在主流踢踏舞界见所未见的新玩法 you would never see in mainstream tap.
二人同台比舞 A simultaneous head-to-head tap-off.
真是亵渎 Oh, scandalous.
两位尽情舞出一台好戏吧 It's time for some fancy-schmancy dancy.
我放音乐啦 Hit it, me.
Bender Bender!
看他跳的 他才不在乎用脚呢 Ewe, look at him dance. He don't care.
看这招 死瘸子 Try this, peg leg.
这个简单 No sweat.
时间到 跳舞猫咪们 裁判已商定 单票投选也出了结果 Time's up, kittens. The judges conferred, and the vote is in.
我选她赢 I pick her.
谢啦 好心的先生 Thanks, Mr. Nice Man.
你们知道吗 虽然医生们都说我的心脏不好 You know, the doctors say my heart doesn't work very good.
但是今天我心里好舒服 因为我尽情跳了舞 But it feels good today because I got to dance.
还让大家都开开心心 And make people happy.
老子的恨意都快爆表了 I never knew I could hate this much.
Bender 她不过是个可爱的小女孩儿嘛 Bender, she's a sweet little girl.
她就是头猪 总有一天我要去她坟上跳踢踏去 She's a pig. I'm gonna tap-dance on her grave someday.
这是我这辈子最最美好的一... This is the bestest-est day of my whole...
不好啦 大家 她心脏病犯了 Oh, my God, people, she's having a heart attack.
萌萌的小心脏犯病啦 A cute little heart attack.
我是医生 而且没错 胸是天然的 I'm a Doctor, and yes, they're real.
周围安全 Clear.
进... 进行得顺利吗? How, how did it go?
非常完美 Just perfect.
这一次 你可以给我描述它们美妙的香气了 This time, you can describe their beautiful aroma to me.
怎么有一股可怕的臭味啊? What is that horrible stench?
我不知道怎么跟你说 但是... I don't know how to tell you this, but...
是花的臭味 It's these flowers!
不是花臭 是... It's not the flowers; It's...
啊 好多了 Ah, much better.
你闻起来就和我想像中的那种味道一样 You smell just like I dreamed you would.
但但是别人都觉得我一股烧着的动物园味儿 B-b-but most people think I smell like a burning zoo.
我从不知道辨别气味的好坏 I never learned a good smell from a bad smell.
但我喜欢你的味道 因为我喜欢你 But I like the way you smell because I like you.
旷世绝恋啊 It's so beautiful.
我很抱歉 她离开我们了 I'm sorry. She's gone.
瞧你那作死样儿 熊孩子 In your dead face, little girl.
我都不用等到去你坟上跳舞了 I'm not even gonna wait to dance on your grave.
老子现在直接就在你尸体上跳 I'm gonna dance on your corpse right now.
天哪 Oh, my God!
- 不行 Bender 你在干嘛 别那样 - Bender 快停下 -No, Bender, what are you doing? No. -Bender, stop.
这机器人给我离场 The robot has to go.
怎么回事? Huh? What's that?
我打了个小盹儿呢 I took a nappy.
真是难以置信 她活过来了 I don't believe it... she's alive.
Bender有节奏的胸部按压让她心脏重新跳动起来了 Bender's rhythmic chest compressions restarted her heart.
他是个大英雄啊 He's a big old hero.
不对啊 刚才我是在... 什么情况? Oh, no, I was trying... hey, wait, huh?
不要以为你救了我一命 我就不会再揍断你的腿 Just because you saved my life doesn't mean I won't beat you down again.
靠啊 你真是个死不悔改的小魔鬼 Man, you are irredeemably evil.
咱们合力统治银河系吧 Together we shall rule the galaxy.
这小踢踏舞跳得真可爱 Aw, what an adorable little kajigger.
行动 Now!
早上的第一杯垃圾汁什么的最美好了 Ah, nothing like the first cup of dumpster juice in the morning.
Marianne? Marianne?
是我 听着 Yes. Listen.
我找了份新工作 我得把你倒进来 I've got a new job, and, well, I'm going to have to dump you.
再好不过了 I'd like that.