下课前 我要谢谢大家 Before we wrap up, I would like to thank you guys
为我填写了这些匿名评估卡 for filling out these anonymous evaluation cards.
我发现你们的反馈 I found your feedback to be
很有建设性 恭维话也不少 largely constructive and flattering,
-谢谢了 -客气啥 - so gracias on that. - De nada.
你以后不用署名 You don't have to sign your name anymore.
明白 Got it.
但是有个评价写得 But there was one evaluation
及其不中听 伤人 that was so harsh and hurtful
种族歧视 and racist
我亲自花时间将那个字迹 that I took the time personally
与以往考试的笔迹进行核对 to analyze that handwriting against past exams.
这位胆小鬼 And this particular coward
写i上面的点时 会画个 dots her "i"s with tiny,
小小 小小的圈圈 itty-bitty, little circles.
这不是难得又有趣吗 Isn't that precious and cute?
现在是谁"行为不规矩 反复无常" Who's "erratic and unstable" now,
踩过界公主[gringa为拉美西语国家对美英女性的蔑称] Princess Gringa?
今天天气挺好的 是吧 Nice day out today, isn't it?
是呀 糟糕 Yeah. Shoot!
-忘了东西? -是呀 - You forget something? - Yeah.
忘了错开和雪瑞走出教室的时间 I forgot to stagger the timing of my exit with Shirley's.
下节课 我们都要去学院另一边上 We both have a class across campus, and I can't go
我可顶不住听这么远的 "真好" that kind of distance with "ooh, that's nice."
-你太过分了 -不 - That's mean. - No.
真不好 That's not nice.
我觉得和雪瑞聊 不容易冷场啊 I find Shirley very easy to talk to,
还有 你应该是奥林匹克 and besides, aren't you supposed to have,
话痨金牌得主才对啊 like, an Olympic gold medal in jibber-jabber?
对 但我是短跑型 Yeah, but I'm a sprinter.
快速连爆俏皮话是我的强项 I'm at my best during high-speed bursts of wit.
和雪瑞一起走 On a Shirley walk,
经过"瘾君子"树下时我就该大喘气儿了 I'd be winded by that stoner tree.
布雷塔 好吗 Hey, Britta, hi. What's up?
-沃恩 最近好吗 -安啦 - Hey, Vaughn, how's it going? - No worries.
真有趣 如果是我装嫩 Interesting. 'Cause I might be worried
扮幼稚踢沙包 我会觉得一点也不好 if I was playing hacky sack a decade too late.
我要去那边上课 My class is that way.
好的 但是我想指出 All right, but I just wanted to point out
我们轻松地走过了近百米 that we easily walked more than 100 yards
没有尴尬冷场 with no awkward pauses,
这就是建立了真正友谊的象征 and that is the sign of a true friend.
你不再想着泡我了 我真的很开心 I'm really glad that you're not hitting on me anymore.
尴尬的冷场 There's the awkward pause.
翻译：贝贝船长 Leon 默默 jacquelinezhao
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本字幕由 YYeTs人人影视 原创翻译制作 仅供学习 禁止用于任何商业盈利行为 更多影视更新 请登陆 www.YYeTs.net
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校对&时间轴：独醉 后期：鱼骨头 总监：青蛙
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《废柴联盟》第一季 第四集
抱歉 对不起 女士们 Excuse me. Oh, sorry, ladies.
邓肯教授 邓肯教授 Professor Duncan! Professor Duncan!
对不起 我叫安妮·埃迪生 Sorry. Annie Edison.
-我听了您的第一课 -你好 - I'm in your 101 lecture. - Hello.
对于您的特殊心理研究 我也有所耳闻 I've heard about your special psych lab.
-邓肯原理 -是的 - Ah. The Duncan principle. - Yes.
我知道只有大二的学生才能参加 And I know it's limited to second-year students,
但我申请大学的平均分是4分[相当于百分制的90分以上] but I had a 4.0 at Riverside High,
我丝毫没有看不起这所学校的意思 and I'm not looking down on this school at all,
短暂的毒瘾 才让我沦落于此 but I'm only here because of a brief addiction to pills
据说磕药可以让我更专注学业 that I was told would help me...focus...
事实却是 让我痛失奖学金和贞操 But they actually made me lose my scholarship and virginity.
这样啊 Right.
如果您能让我早一年参与研究 If you would let me take your lab early,
那将是我成绩单上最浓墨重彩的一笔 it would be a real feather in my transcript.
说实话 这种情况我遇到过很多次了 Okay, I've actually been in this situation many times,
我事先声明 so I'm just going to be up front.
我被禁止和学生约会 I'm not allowed to date students.
你是8分靓女也不行 Even though you're an eight.
相当于英国的10分 Which is a British ten,
气死我了 I'm angry.
但是如果 即便这样 你还有兴趣 But if, in spite of that, you are still interested,
那你就可以参与研究 then you may join the lab.
好了 你要带两位实验对象 Okay. You need to bring two human subjects.
能不能借我五块 这件事丝毫不会影响 And it would not hurt your chances one bit
你进研究小组 if you could lend me a fiver.
我好像把钱包忘在提包里了 I seem to have left my purse in my duffle
我的提包在车尾箱里 所以 and my duffle in the boot of my lorry, so--
我问得很客气 然后熊猫脱下了他的裤子 I asked politely, and then panda took his pants off.
原来"无性别"是这个意思 I never even knew that's what asexual meant.
不知道这个快递邮包里装着什么 I wonder what this express package could be?
某人急着让我快点收到 Somebody had to get something to me very fast.
你把邮包带来学校 You brought your mail to campus?
爽啊 我的"听远器" Oh, yes. My ear-noculars.
是什么 看起来像你的蓝牙设备 What is that? It looks like your bluetooth thingie.
不 不是 这是我的手机耳机 No, no, no, no, no. This is my cell phone headset.
这是"听远器" And this is ear-noculars.
间谍或其他牛人用的 让你听见音波的声音 It's for spies and whatnot. It gives you sonic hearing.
-所有的声音都是由音波组成 -你说啥 - All hearing is sonic. - What's that?
谁想参与心理学实验 So who wants to be in a psych experiment?
伙计们 伙计们 Hey, guys, guys, guys?
安妮在说什么实验 Annie is talking about some kind of experiment.
她就在你身后 没兴趣 She's behind you. Not interested.
拜托了 给报酬的 Please? You get paid.
-会对臀部实验两下吗 -不会 - Do they do stuff to your butt? - No.
如果对臀部实验两下 是不是报酬更多 Do you get paid more if they do stuff to your butt?
-不会 -那好吧 - No. - That's fine.
-我参加 -太好啦 - I'll do it. I'm in. - Yay!
你呢 阿布蒂 明天能来吗 How about you, Abed? It's tomorrow.
明天 Ooh, tomorrow?
美景电影院有《夺宝奇兵》四部专场 They're showing all four Indiana Joneses at the Vista (theatre).
我很期待前三部 I'm really looking forward to the first three.
鞭子我都买了 I bought a whip.
这真的对我很重要 阿布蒂 This is really important to me, Abed.
作为我的朋友 你能去吗 Could you please go as my friend?
我非常好的朋友 My really good friend?
我没发现我们是非常好的朋友 Wow, I didn't realize we were really good friends.
我觉得我们就像《老友记》中的钱德勒和菲比 I figured we were more like Chandler and Phoebe.
他们之间绝不会有故事 They never really had stories together.
好的 我去 钱德勒[原来小蒂觉得自己是菲比] Sure, I'll do it, Chandler.
谢谢你 阿布蒂 Oh, thank you, Abed.
我要去英雄救布雷塔一把 I'm gonna go save Britta from that dude.
是啊 美人有麻烦了 Yeah, she looks like she's in trouble.
"帅到你窒息"的麻烦 Hope he doesn't try to "handsome" her to death.
熊猫没有裤子 And panda has no pants.
-两位 -啥事 哥们儿 我是沃恩 - Hey - Hi, what's up, man? I'm Vaughn.
-你在排队吗 -没有 - You in line? - Oh, no, no, no.
我们只是在放松一下 We're just, uh, we're just chillin'.
你不会是想来杯咖啡吧 Hey, you're not gonna order coffee?
不 我只是看看布雷塔是否... Oh, no, I was just gonna see if Britta--
我没有恶意的 兄弟 我以前也喝咖啡 Hey, no judgment, bro. I used to do coffee.
后来我就换喝绿茶了 Then I made the switch to green tea.
绿茶好像 好像 It's, like--it's, like,
充满了抗氧化剂还有其它好东西 filled with these antioxidants and stuff.
-太有品了 -有品 是的 - It's pretty tight. - Tight. Yes.
我听说过绿茶的这些特点 I've heard that about green tea.
我喜欢绿茶 我也应该换一换 I like green tea. I should make the change.
来击掌吧 甜甜宝贝熊 Up top, sugar bear.
-是的 我也来一下 -来吧 - Yeah, give me some of that. - There it is.
小杯咖啡 谢谢 Small coffee, please.
布雷塔要改喝绿茶了 Britta's making the change to green tea.
那不错 绿茶对皮肤有好处 Oh, that's good. It's good for your skin.
各位研究助理 欢迎欢迎 Welcome, research assistants.
请注意监视器 If you turn your attention to the monitor,
你们会看到我们的研究对象 you will see that our subjects
正在等待实验开始 但是 are waiting for the experiment to begin, but...
实验已经在进行中了 It's actually happening right now.
让他们等待就是实验 You see, the waiting is the experiment.
邓肯原理很简单 The Duncan Principle is simple.
也就是 自我控制能力的减弱 Namely, that the more control lost by the--
我也要写下来 Yeah, I'm gonna write this down too, actually.
这原理太棒了 That's a good point.
自我控制能力的减弱 The more control lost by the ego,
本能冲动性就会增加 the more gained by the id,
最终产生一个可预见的惊人的 resulting in a surprisingly predictable
情绪爆发 或者爆发点 emotional eruption or breaking point.
即老爸老妈都知道的 俗语说的发脾气 Known to ma and pa as a good old-fashioned tantrum.
安妮 你去告诉我们的实验对象 Annie, why don't you, uh, go and tell our subjects
我们的实验即将 that we're going to be starting the experiment
在5分钟内开始 in five minutes, okay?
还有 安妮 And Annie...
事实上实验不会开始的 It's never actually going to start.
我们开始吧 Let's do this.
大家好 Hi, everyone.
你好 特洛伊 Hi, Troy.
你好 阿布蒂 Hi, Abed.
你好 昌老师 Hi, Senor Chang.
怎么啦 一个社区学院的西语老师 What, a community college Spanish teacher
不能赚这80块钱吗 can't use 80 bucks?
实验稍稍有点延迟 Well, we're just running a little bit behind,
可能会在5分钟后开始 so we'll probably start in about five minutes.
不 不 不 不 不 不 不 不 No, no, no! No, no, no, no, no!
太不像话了 受不了了 It's unacceptable, all right?
你们骗人 You lied to me!
既然说了是9点开始 When you say something starts at 9:00,
就得做到9点开始 it starts at nueve!
不 No!
-不 -休斯顿[太空人用语] 发现白痴 - No! - Houston, we have an idiot.
你知道我们下课后同路吗 Did you know we walk the same way after class?
我确信你不知道 否则我们就会一起走了 I'm sure you didn't or else we would've been walking together,
除非你是个混蛋 unless you're a jerk.
开玩笑的 Just kidding.
那我们走吧 Let's do it.
别走太快了 我腿短 Don't go too fast for these dogs. Short legs.
-你觉得... -你有个小孩 是吗 - How do you like-- - So you've got a kid, right?
-什么 -没事 - What's that? - Nothing.
皮尔斯头脑不太正常啊 So Pierce isn't exactly right in the head, is he?
我知道很多成年男人 I know a lot of grown men
耳朵里都会冒出个雷达装置来 with radar dishes coming out of their ears.
他就像《机械神探》[卡通系列 99年推出真人版电影] He's like "Inspector Gadget".
是的 "大小便失禁系统开启" Yeah, go, go, Gadget incontinence.
说说那个总在布雷塔身边转悠 And how about that guy that's always around,
和她调情的家伙吧 flirting with Britta?
正想说这个 他真是极品啊 沃恩吧 I know! He's the worst! Vaughn?
没错 他的头发到底怎么了 I know, and what is it with his hair?
总是湿湿的 It's perpetually moist.
好 我们已经进行了3个小时 现在回顾一下 Okay, we're three hours in, so let's review what we've seen.
尤其注意每个实验对象的爆发点 And pay close attention to every subject's breaking point.
这个是声嘶力竭 We've got a shouter.
那个是跺穿地板 再见了 嬉皮士 That one's a stomper. Bye, hippie.
这个是普通的疯子水平 上窜下跳 There's a generic whack job, bouncing up and down
犹如多动症的儿童 like a six-foot child.
颤抖 写下来 Shaking. Write that down.
明显颤抖 Visible shakes.
看那个追大个子的小家伙 Look at the little one chase the big one.
看他在跑 我来让他跑快点 Look at him go. I'm gonna make him go quicker.
他就像班尼·希尔[英国喜剧大师] 去抓他吧 It's like Benny Hill looks. Whoo, ooh, ooh, get him.
再来一次 去抓他吧 Come back again. Whoo, ooh, ooh, get him.
真有趣 是吧 All right? There's a bit of fun.
心情都好起来了 It lightens the mood.
然后回到现在 And back to the present.
只剩下两个人 And then there were two.
爆发 Break.
不 不 不 安妮 No, no, no! Annie!
里面到底在搞什么 What is going on in there?
为什么 为什么要等这么久 Why? What is taking so long?
我在这里浪费了一整天 你害的 I've wasted all day here for you.
今晚有灵魂列车音乐大奖[奖项主要为R&B 说唱 灵乐及爵士] The Soul Train Awards were tonight.
你对臀部实验保证过了 You promised butt stuff!
出局了 还是我们厉害 And he's out. We got him.
三振出局 Strike three.
一边儿凉快去吧 You're gone.
这地上好多灰尘 There's so much dust in here.
你们知道吗 Do you know what?
酝酿的时间越长 爆发的越厉害 The longer they wait, the harder they break.
等着看好戏吧 同学们 Buckle up, students.
你注意到沙包男脱衣的频率了吗 Do you see how often hacky sack takes his shirt off?
[同志篮球真人秀 球员几乎都裸露上身]
就算下棋 恐怕他也会上演一出《少点束缚多点激情》 He'd play "Shirts and Skins" in a game of checkers.
能一吐为快真是太好了 I'm so glad to be able to talk to someone about this.
我很想和布雷塔说这个话题 I wanted to say something to Britta about it,
但我们现在是朋友关系 but we're supposed to be friends now,
她会觉得我是在嫉妒 and she'd think I was jealous.
不明白为什么你和布雷塔没成 I don't see why you and Britta aren't together.
白皮肤的俊男靓女 一起上学 Two cute white people, going to school together,
多般配啊 just seems right.
雪瑞 我们可不是动物园被逼着配对的大熊猫 Shirley, we're not pandas in a zoo.
我的天啊 Oh. Oh, dear.
不该看到的偏偏看到了 That is not what I want to see.
又在脱了 There goes the shirt.
是你啊 我很好 Hey, I'm fine.
想让我 Want me to, uh,
想让我帮你看看有没有草渍吗 want me to check you for grass stains?
我不知何时 也不知如何开口 I wasn't sure how or when to bring up
告诉你我和沃恩的事 that I was hanging out with Vaughn.
我觉得你会取笑他 还有我 I figured that you'd make fun of him...and me.
首先 Uh, first of all,
朋友之间不会互相嘲笑 friends do not make fun of each other,
就算是被嬉皮撂倒在地 也不能取笑 even if they're being tackled in the quad by a hippie.
其次 沃恩看上去不错 And secondly, Vaughn seems cool.
你们应该找时间聚聚 Well, you guys should hang out sometime.
我得走了 I gotta go.
刚才那幕很俗气 I--uh, that was tacky out there.
你不会再看到那一幕了 You won't ever see that again.
安啦 小布 Oh, no worries, Brah.
雪瑞 看到昌老师今天穿的袜子了吗 Shirley, did you see Senor Chang's socks today?
斗牛士的行头 Tiny bullfighters.
我有个更搞的 I can top that.
你看到沙包男的脚链了吗 Did you see that hacky sack wears an anklet?
为啥你不取笑沃恩了 Since when won't you talk about Vaughn?
我正试着和布雷塔成为好朋友 I'm trying to be a good friend to Britta.
她认为我会取笑他 She thought I was gonna make fun of him,
我想让她另眼相看 but I want to be unpredictable.
我要向她证明 我不是她想像中的混蛋 我要对 I'm gonna show her that I am not the jerk she thinks I am
那个喝绿茶 围圈敲手鼓的半裸男 友好到他奶奶家去 and friend the hell out of that green-tea-drinking drum circler.
好吧 但你肯定注意到了 Okay, but tell me you've noticed
他那小小的胸前两点吧 how small his nipples are.
-对我没吸引力 -什么 - Not engaging. - What?
阐述事实就算不上是八卦 It's not gossip when it's fact.
我孩子的宠物仓鼠 乳头都大过他的 My kids have got hamsters with bigger nips.
-我不说 -得了 - No! - Oh, well.
-不 -杰夫 - No! - Jeff!
监视器暂停了吗 Is it on pause?
不 他还在 No, that's just him.
不好意思 让你等了26个小时 Sorry you've been waiting 26 hours.
再等5分钟就可以了 It's just gonna be another five minutes.
好的 没问题 Okey, dokey.
我的妈呀 Oh, my god.
为什么他不走 Why won't he leave?
-教授 -什么 - Professor. - What?
我很抱歉 但是他一动不动 I'm sorry, but this guy's not moving.
我有课要上 I have classes to go to.
走吧 走好 Go! Fine!
[披头士灵魂人物 被马克·查普曼枪击身亡 查普曼又高又胖]
再去刺杀约翰·列侬吧 你个窝囊废 Go kill John Lennon again, you loser.
他毁了我的研究 He's ruined my study!
他毁了邓肯原理 He has--he has warped the Duncan principle.
见鬼 你这错得离谱的数据 Damn you, you outlying piece of datum!
都是你 都是你的错 It's you! It's your fault!
但是 是你让我带实验对象的 But you told me to bring subjects.
[88年电影 主角患自闭症 曾住在精神病院]
是实验对象 不是"雨人" Yeah, subjects! Not Rain man!
我根本就不该让你参与实验 I should never have let you into this lab.
["Little Annie Fanny"系列漫画 曾连载于《花花公子》杂志]
有胸无脑笨安妮 没事找事讨厌女 Miss Annie Fanny, panties in a bunch!
令人捧腹大笑啊 Oh! Oh, that's so hilarious!
这笑话是你上次匆忙 Did you think of that
去看牙医时想出来的吗[美国人喜欢嘲笑英国人是烂牙] the last time you skipped a trip to the dentist?
让我用另外一个问题 来回答你的问题 Oh, let me answer that question with another question.
不公平 不公平 这太不公平了 It's not--it's not fair! It's not fair!
你们在干什么 What are you doing?
放下 别写了 Put your-- Stop writing!
放下笔 给我那个 Put your pen-- Give me that!
滚滚滚 你们这些猪头 Get out! Get out, you dorks!
滚 Get out!
你毁了邓肯原理 You have destroyed the Duncan principle!
回家吧你 Go home!
好啊 Cool.
回见啦 See ya.
布雷塔说你做过不少社区服务工作 So Britta said that you did a lot of community service.
在老年活动中心 举行终极飞盘活动 Ultimate frisbee at the senior's center.
令人叹为观止 It is amazing.
飞盘怎样玩才算终极 And what makes frisbee ultimate?
天啦 如果每回答这问题一次 Aw, man, if I had a nickel
就有五分钱拿 我希望人人都来问 for every time I wished somebody asked me that.
我去拿甜点 你要什么 I'm gonna get dessert. Want anything?
胡萝卜 Carrots.
我就不用了 Oh, I'm good.
-两位好啊 -你好 - Hey, you two. - Hey.
好漂亮的T恤 Well, that's a cool shirt.
谢谢 多谢夸奖 Thank you. Thank you very much.
哪个牌子的 Where's it from?
其实我不知道 Oh, uh, I don't even know.
我猜这是 I guess it's-- Well, uh--
看这里 "恒适"[名牌 主营棉类衣物] Hey, look at that. "Hanes Classic."
真不错啊 Oh, that's nice.
其实大众都低估了老年人 You know, people underestimate the elderly.
你知道吗 当你看到这些老年人在户外 You know, but you see these guys out there
互抛飞盘 and they're throwing the bee
他们真的很热爱生活 你会觉得很受鼓舞 and they're just loving life. It's just inspiring.
我会好好 好好地想想 You know, I'm gonna really-- I'm gonna think about it.
好的 我过去看看布布 All right. I'm gonna go check on Britts.
回见 See ya.
你还真不择手段 You are the devil.
同意 I know.
我们周六去哪里
星期天去 Domingo, pl--
其实 我 Oh, okay, I--
我们周六去哪里 Where do we go on Saturdays?
-你说的周日 -我想问你个问题 - You said Sunday. - I have a question for you.
你觉得沃恩不错 对吧 You like Vaughn, right?
他 他很可爱啊 Oh, he--he's very cute.
我只是有点担心 I'm just worried
他对这段关系的热情投入程度 that he's thinking a little bit more intensely
大于我 about this thing than I am.
在那什么后 他会说些话 He says stuff, you know, after...
放学后 School?
-在那什么之后 -吃完餐后薄荷糖? - After... - Dinner mints?
在那... After...
不会是上床后吧 Not having sex?
怎么会那样 How was that?
什么 算了 What? Forget that.
现在的问题是 他管我叫"宝贝儿" The problem right now is that he's calling me "babe."
还要牵手 He's trying to hold my hand.
就好像我俩在谈恋爱一样 It's getting a little relationship-y.
他还给了我点东西 And he gave me something.
生殖器疱疹吗 Herpes?
不是 这个 No. This.
一首诗啊 A poem?
这种东西我该如何回应 How do I respond to something like that?
难道说谢谢吗 "Thank you"?
这问题问的好 Well, it's a very good question.
我会回答你 And it's one I will answer. Uh--
我有短信 Ooh, I'm getting a text.
如果你不介意的话 我先看这个 I'm just gonna read it, if you don't mind.
我在看短信 现在看完了 I am reading it, and it is read.
海天交融一色处 伊人可曾见 "Did you ever notice where the ocean meets the sky, did ya?
精灵蓝眸催人醉 布布在心间 It's the same wizard blue that I see in your eye, Brit-ta."
不是吧 还"精灵蓝" Oh, no, no. "wizard blue"?
对啊 Yeah.
太感谢了 多亏你我才有这么乐的一天 Thank you so much. You just brightened my day.
真开心我们又可以一起拿那家伙开涮 I'm so glad we can rip on that dude again.
看这个 看这个 Look at this, look at this.
"超帅"这里还有泪痕 That is the stain of a teardrop over the word "rad."
他居然用了"超帅" 我以为他说"超衰" Oh, he said "rad"? I thought he said "bad."
这么说更糟 Oh, that makes it worse.
真不敢相信他居然识字 I'm surprised he can read.
-明白我意思吗 -明白 - You know? - I know.
抱歉 我没有参加那个心理实验 Hey, sorry about bailing on the psych experiment.
那本身就是实验 特洛伊 That was the experiment, Troy.
我们在测试人们等待的极限 We were testing to see how long people would wait in the room.
懂了 Oh, gotcha.
懂了 "Gotcha"?
-你想说的就是这个吗 -对啊 - That's all you have to say? - Yeah.
你在那屋里坐了26个小时 You sat in a room for 26 straight hours.
难道你都不烦吗 Didn't that bother you?
-当然烦了 我怒了 -那干嘛不走呢 - Yeah, I was livid. - Then why didn't you leave?
因为你让我等着 而且你说咱们是朋友 Because you asked me to stay and you said we were friends.
等等 这也是实验的一部分吗 Wait. Is this still part of the experiment?
他更像是长了鱼嘴的小狗 He's more like a puppy with a fish mouth.
没错 更像是这样子 Right, right. It's more like this.
行啊 笑吧 That's right. Laugh it up.
你们想知道他们在笑什么吗 You guys want to know what they're doing?
-想 -当然 - Yeah. - Sure.
他们在嘲笑我们大家 Making fun of all of us.
我用"听远器"听到的 I heard you with my own ear... noculars.
皮尔斯 我们不是在嘲笑你 Pierce, we are not making fun of you.
是啊 管我叫"沙包男" Uh-huh. Calling me "hacky sack"
嘲笑我的六块腹肌 还有我湿湿的头发 and ripping my--my six pack abs and my moist hair.
还有你刚做的那个鬼脸 And that face you made?
我很肯定你在模仿安妮 Well, I think it's pretty obviously Annie.
我知道这肯定还是实验的一部分 Okay, this is definitely still part of the experiment.
皮尔斯 我们不是在嘲笑你 Pierce, we were not making fun of you.
才怪 Yeah.
我们在嘲笑布雷塔的男友 沃恩 We're making fun Britta's boyfriend, Vaughn.
好吧 如果是那样的话 Oh, good. Well, in that case.
我们应该团结起来一起嘲笑他 But if we're gonna do something, let's do it as a team.
我先来 可能他下面那根棍又短又细 I'll get the ball rolling. Maybe he has a tiny penis.
这是在说谁呢 Who is this guy?
你们可得会会他 You all have got to see him.
总是把"安啦 安啦"挂在嘴边 Everything's all, "no worries, no worries."
而且总是把三个问候的词儿一起说 And he always says hello three times in a row.
你好 晚上好 你好吗 Hello, good evening, how are you?
还有 看这个 他还写诗 And--here, look! He wrote a poem!
我能看吗 Can I read it?
-我们不应该传阅的 -没关系的 - We shouldn't show that. - Oh, no, it's fine.
我差不多一小时后就可以走了 So I'll be done in, like, an hour.
-安啦 -他又说了 - Yeah. No worries. - He just said it!
各位 你们见过沃恩了 对吧 Guys, you've met Vaughn, right?
你好 好吗 大家好 Hey. What's up? Hi.
这组人刚看了儿童搞笑诗集 是不 This troop's got a "Case of the giggles", huh?
那是不是 Is that--?
你把我写的诗给他们了吗 Did you give them my poem?
-没有 -好吧 - No. - Okay, well,
那为什么那老古董拿着我的诗的照片 why is the dinosaur rocking a picture of my poem?
给你 读读看 Here, read it.
你们是在 我明白了 Oh, you guys are-- Right?
你们在嘲笑我 是不是 You guys are laughing at me, aren't you?
-对啊 -哪有 - Yeah. - No.
你们居然 天哪 That's uh, wow.
这是我经历的最没品的事 This is the least tight thing that's ever happened to me.
你太过分了 I can't believe you.
没错 杰夫 你怎么能这样呢 Honestly, Jeff, how dare you?
我能听到他在门外 他在哭呢 I could hear him outside. He's crying.
现在开始大嚷大叫了 Now he's barking.
杰夫 等等 对不起我出卖了你 Jeff, wait! I'm sorry I sold you out.
布雷塔永远不会原谅我了 Britta is never gonna forgive me.
我真后悔给你看了那诗 I can't believe I showed you that poem.
[加拿大的系列剧集 反应青春期少年的各种问题]
上帝啊 我的人生就是"迪格拉丝中学" Oh, my god, my life is "Degrassi High".
杰夫 我说人闲话已经到了病态的地步了 Oh, Jeff. I have a gossip problem.
我喜欢煽风点火 杰夫 我唯恐天下不乱 I stir the pot, Jeff. I'm a pot stirrer.
这并非我今年参加的唯一的学习小组 This isn't even the only study group I've had this year.
你看到那边的姐们儿了吗 You see those ladies over there?
我以前是那组的 后来被撵出来了 I used to be in their group till they kicked me out.
她们叫我"瞎掰俏娘子" 其实这是个褒义的绰号 They call me "tattle-ina." It's a bumblebee nickname.
虽然听起来挺好 但被叫绰号总是不爽 It's--it's cute, but it stings.
看那大婶 耳环圈真够大 Hey, look at the size of that woman's earrings.
小狗都可以跳过去了 It's like little dogs should be jumping through them.
-这样不行 -快看啊 - This is never going to work. - Look at them.
不能再说人闲话了 This has to end. Mm-mm, mm-mm.
雪瑞 别这样 我们还是可以闲聊的 Shirley, don't do this. Look, we can still hang out.
别再对人品头论足就行了 It's just, you know, we won't bag on people.
拜托 杰夫 那我们该聊点什么啊 Come on, Jeff. What are we gonna talk about?
我孩子吗 还是你的 你的医生事业啊 My kids? Your--your doctor career?
-我曾是律师 -看吧 我已经觉得没劲了 - I was a lawyer. - See? I'm already bored.
至少 "微点"将是我们永远的珍贵回忆 Well, we'll always have "tiny nipples."
他那两点可真小 They were tiny.
杰夫 等等 虽然我不应该告诉你 Jeff, wait. Wait. I know I shouldn't do this,
但还是要最后当次大嘴巴 but one last little piece of gossip.
布雷塔告诉我 她有次春梦的男主角是你 Britta told me she had a sex dream about you.
所以你是有机会的 You still have a chance.
-再说点细节 -没门 - Details! - Mm-mmm!
我要细节 Details.
告诉我细节 Details!
阿布蒂 这个给你 Abed, here.
很抱歉 我对你大吼大叫 I wanted to say sorry for yelling at you.
《夺宝奇兵》 太好了 Indiana Jones. Cool.
我只买了前三部 因为 I just got the first three because...
第四部是烂片 The fourth one blows.
-我们没事了 -布雷塔 - We're cool. - Britta.
我不想和你说话 I do not want to talk to you.
我知道 我很抱歉 No, I know, and I'm sorry.
我很抱歉 非常非常抱歉 如果你希望 I'm really sorry. I'm really, really sorry. And I will go talk to Vaughn
-我可以去跟沃恩解释 -我们分手了 - if you want me to. - Vaughn broke up with me.
你辜负了我对你的信任 你太差劲了 You broke my trust. You suck.
我知道 对不起 I know, and I'm sorry,
但我所处的位置也很尴尬 but I was in a tough position.
女性朋友的角色我可扮不来 I couldn't handle just being one of the girls.
那你想怎样啊 What do you want to be?
在陌生人与聊聊男友的女性话题间 Is there a spot on the friendship spectrum
有没有一个平衡点 between total stranger
是属于朋友范畴内的 and having to hear about the guys you date?
理想中 最好是一个比送你去机场 And ideally, just a notch underneath
以及替你刷厨房 稍低的位置 driving you to the airport and painting your kitchen?
偶尔当猫保姆 这种层次的朋友如何 How about the friend level where you sometimes have to cat-sit?
没问题 Done.
如果我偶尔全裸出境于你梦中 And if I'm occasionally naked in your dreams,
我不会介意的 I won't complain.
-雪瑞这家伙 -我知道 - Shirley. - I know.
她有点问题 她就喜欢煽风点火 She's got a problem. She stirs the pot.
唯恐天下不乱 She's a pot stirrer.
抱歉 伙计们 Sorry, dudes.
安啦 哥们儿 No worries, man.
哥们儿 有些不安 有些不安 Yeah, some worries, man. Some worries.
雪瑞肯定会对那人好好调侃一番 Shirley would have said something funny about that guy.
然后我就告诉他 So I told him...
你好啊 杰夫 Oh, hey--hey, Jeff.
不妙 Oh, no.
皮尔斯 把你的什么器借我下 Pierce! Pierce, give me your ear-thing.
已经扔掉了 Got rid of it.
杰夫 你要知道有些事 You see, Jeff, there are certain things
男人还是不听为妙 man was not meant to hear.
我们被设计好了 无论你觉得是被什么设计的 We were designed, by whatever entity you choose,
总之是听这个范围内的东西 to hear what's in this range,
而且也就是这个范围了 And really, this range alone.
因为在这范围内 你知道是谁在和我们说话 Because you know who's talking to us in this range?
我们爱的人 The people we love.
他一定是听到我们说他是"机械神探"了 He must have heard us call him Inspector Gadget.
[火人节于每年9月初在内华达州黑岩沙漠举行]
我认为是时候点燃"火人"了[行为艺术的聚会 结束前烧火人] Oh, I think it's time for burning man.
我是萨达姆·侯赛因 Ew, I'm Saddam Hussein. Ew.
很高兴认识你啊 老兄 Nice to meet you, dude.
我喜欢读书 也喜欢做"绝望的主妇" Oh, wow. I love reading and being a Desperate Housewife.
注意 我来啦 Hey, man, coming through.
我最喜欢"绝望的主妇"了 I love de Desperate Housewives.
我是"天才小医生"兼美偶帅哥主持 I'm Dr. Doogie Seacrest.
我40了 我比谁都厉害 I think I'm better than everyone else because I'm 40.
我哪有40岁 I'm not 40.
透过窗户我能听见你们 笨蛋 I can hear you through the window, morons.
假装睡着了 Just pretend like you're asleep.
假装在睡觉 Just pretend like you were sleeping.