本周有甜蜜的情人节 It's valentine's week.
格林德尔的吉祥物"人" 化身为丘比特"人" When the greendale "human being" is the cupid being,
为心爱的人送出礼物吧 delivering your gift to that special someone.
不过请注意 爱神的脸是用记号笔画在丝袜上的杰作 But remember, cupid's face is magic marker on nylon,
所以爱情不仅是盲目的 so love is not only blind,
也会令人头晕眼花兼无故好斗[丝袜透气性差导致] but also dizzy and a little belligerent.
明天的舞会我是教师督导 I'm chaperoning tomorrow's dance.
你也来吧 You should come.
说不定你的学习组成员会去 Maybe your study buds'll go.
那个金发的叫什么 布苦 布甜 布鬼[1988年电影] What's the blonde's name, bitter, butter, "Beetlejuice"?
是叫布雷塔 她觉得情人节只是形式化的 Oh, Britta. She says Valentine's Day ritualizes a connection
将热情与糖果联系在一起 between affection and candy,
女生只会为此卖弄风骚 so girls can learn the ropes of prostitution.
说白了 没人约 Translation, no date.
我陪你去舞会 I'm gonna join you at that dance.
但我没什么为人男友的经验 But as a novice boyfriend,
可否提供张扫雷图 地图名为 can I get a map of the minefield
女人在情人节的期望是什么 known as women's valentine expectations?
我希望每一天 Every day of the year,
什么令你开心 你就做什么 I want you to do what makes you happy.
明天我将开心的与统计成痴的 Tomorrow I'm gonna be happy spending the night
统计学教授共度良宵 with an insatiable statistics professor.
杰夫 我是从注册办公室打来 Jeff, it's the registrar's office.
似乎你将飞行里数当学费付 Seems you were wrong about paying tuition with airline miles.
-我们需要的是支票 -信息删除 - We gonna need a check... - Message deleted.
杰夫·翁格 Jeff Winger.
是我 I am calling you.
你可能正在 不管了 You're probably... Whatever.
你好 呀 So wassup?
是丘比特"人" Oh, it's the cupid being.
箭都背上了 真是安全起"箭" Oh, now it has arrows. That's safe.
餐厅里大胡子厨师送的 Oh, it's from the cook with the long beard in the cafeteria.
可能他说我帮你拿[另意泡到你]时就... I guess when he said, I'm gonna git you,
他是说拿巧克力 Uh, he meant chocolates.
沃恩送来的玫瑰花 Oh! A flower from Vaughn.
他去静思人生方向了 He's away on a vision quest.
居然有人送你礼物 阿布蒂 You got something, Abed?
又一位女演员送的又一篮松饼 Another muffin basket from another actress,
她想参演我的下一部影片 饼规则一下 who wants to be in my next film.
-饼规则有用吗 -有用 - Does that work? - Yep.
梅丽尔·斯特里普拿了两次奥斯卡 就因为饼烘得好 Meryl Streep has two Oscars because of her baking.
这是指桑骂槐 但我还没想出来槐指什么 Oh, that's sarcasm, but I forgot to inflect.
现在感觉更像指桑骂槐了 This sounds way more like sarcasm.
含沙射影真有意思 Inflection is so interesting.
那个大袋子 下面的 That big bag, uh, at the bottom,
是给我的吗 is that for me?
有没有什么是给特洛伊的 Anything in there for Troy?
特洛伊·巴恩斯 Troy Barnes?
巴恩斯 逗号 特洛伊 Barnes comma Troy?
谁会在乎有没有礼物收 Who cares about getting things?
糟蹋了情人节的真谛 Destroy the true meaning of Valentine's Day.
用来纪念圣瓦伦丁生日的 The birth of Saint Valentines.
箭都背上了 真是安全起"箭" Oh, good. Now it has arrows. That's safe.
-抱歉我来晚了 -没关系 - Sorry I'm late. - That's okay.
事实上你给人带来早上的感觉 Actually, you look very early.
天啊 我迟到的一塌糊涂 Oh, god, I'm really late.
-的确是 -回见 - Yes, you are. - Yeah, see you later.
需要什么 Can I get you something?
水 嗅盐 Water, smelling salts?
科特·柯本自杀的不在场证据 An alibi for Cobain's suicide?
[涅磐乐队主唱 自杀他杀悬而未决]
不用 你到是可以整整你的马脸 No, but you can help yourself to a shorter forehead,
削尖奇宝[饼干广告人物]式的圆鼻头 然后闭嘴 a non-keebler nose, and shutting up.
我认输了 Mm, that stings.
不是因为风凉话说不过你 I mean, not the words.
是您呼出的气儿变成波旁酒云飘来了 The clouds of bourbon vapor forming them.
我当愤青那阵儿一姐们儿来了 A girlfriend from my anarchist days was in town,
我们喝高了 and we drank.
不用说那么白吧 Everything.
是嘛 Yeah.
于是你说 我该给杰夫打个电话 And then you said, "I should call Jeff."
才怪 Yeah.
我乐翻天的时候怎么会第一时间 'Cause the first thing I do when I'm having fun
就是想起... is think about--
杰夫·翁格 Jeff Winger.
是我 你可能正在 I am calling you. You're probably--
不管了 Whatever.
你好 呀 So wassup?
醉酒电话 A drunk dial.
潜台词丰富 引人入胜 So much subtext, so much intrigue.
入胜到时下小青年简称这个叫BCI So much of what the kids are calling B.C.I.
意思是 招床伴之暗语 That's, uh, booty call implication.
布雷塔怎么了 What happened to Britta?
世界还是有公理的 Justice.
费了一年的劲儿否认对我有感觉 只因不想 Having spent the year denying her attraction to me
花落一家 但终于给我打电话了 just to be alternative. Britta called me'
在凌晨三点 只为了问一句 at 3:00 a.m, just to ask,
你好 呀 "What's up?"
醉酒电话 是BCI吗 A drunk dial? Was there B.C.I..?
姓布的小妞要找床伴 Booty call with a capital "b".
-这可不妙了 -没什么大不了的 - This can't be good. - It's no biggie.
我们经常打口水战 We--we give each other crap all the time.
说到重点了 Well, that's the point.
如今你占尽上风 她拿什么跟你斗 What crap can she give you now that you hold all the cards?
你打破了平衡 就象情景喜剧 You've shifted the balance. Like in a sitcom,
一个角色看到了另外一个的裸体 when one character sees another one naked.
情景喜剧里真有这么演过 Is that really a sitcom staple?
我在信口雌黄 胡言乱语 No, I have no idea what I'm talking about.
我是阿布蒂 我从来不看电视 I'm Abed, I never watch TV.
本字幕由 YYeTs人人影视 原创翻译制作 仅供学习 禁止用于任何商业盈利行为 更多影视更新 请登陆 www.YYeTs.net
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翻译：独醉 樱桃饺饺 时间轴：独醉
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校对：独醉 后期：鱼骨头 总监：独醉
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《废柴联盟》 第一季 第十六集
我们都知道在英语里 Now we all know that in English,
雄鸡的叫声是 the rooster says...
在西班牙语里 雄鸡是这样叫 In Espanol, the gallo says...
不像话 我正上课呢 What? I'm teaching.
抱歉 I'm sorry.
我就知道你没给我 Aha! I knew you were holding back.
我约会的女生送的 Aw! It's from the girl I'm dating.
生物课上认识的 Yeah, I met her in biology.
她本来去地理课教室 认错了门牌 She was looking for geology and misread the sign.
然后我说 这里可不是学习疆域的 Yeah, I said, "we do not study countries in here."
她傻傻的 不过 Yeah, she's-- She's dumb, but--
很可爱 But sweet.
我的是丹妮尔送的 她是 Yeah, mine's from Danielle. She's a...
我营销课班上的可爱女士 a lovely lady in my marketing class.
我们上床了 We're sleeping together.
她们有二位相伴可真幸运 They sound like very lucky ladies.
她们可不是虚构人物 Yeah, they're not made up.
我的天 这是怎么呢 Beep, beep. Oh, my god. What's going on?
我的废话测量仪表现异常 My bullcrap meter's going crazy.
这礼物明显就是你们自己送自己的 It's these presents you've obviously sent to yourselves
让别人以为你们有女朋友了 to make it look like you have girlfriends.
瞎说 That's ridiculous.
这个明显就是你的笔迹 颤大爷 This is obviously your handwriting, Mr. tremor.
而你的居然写成"爱你的特洛伊敬上" And yours is signed, "Love, Troy"?
这是迄今为止 我在课堂上见过的 I tell you, this is the most pathetic thing
最悲剧的事 I've ever seen in the classroom.
我的天啊 Oh, my god.
看他坐在那边 Look at him over there.
从牛排上切下软骨 Cutting the gristle off his steak
和切下特洛伊与皮尔斯的尊严时一样粗鲁 as ruthlessly as he cut off Troy and Pierce's dignity.
他居然吃软骨 Ew! Now he's eating the gristle.
昌真是令我觉得恶心 I'm so sick of Chang.
人家哪里痛他就踩哪里 Always tearing people down,
弄得大家都自我感觉奇差 making them feel horrible about themselves.
得有人像他羞辱别人一样去羞辱他 Somebody needs to humiliate him the way he humiliate always.
长胡子的 给我盒果汁 Hey. Moustache, get me a juice box.
-现在就要 -羞辱他的人就是我们 - Now! - And that's somebody is us.
你可以朝着这些食物大吐特吐 Hey, you can vomit onto this food,
它们本身闻起来就是那样 because it already smells like it.
是的 非常臭 Yeah, totally.
我任职的律师事务所 曾组织去迪士尼 My law firm went on a retreat to Disney World once,
我醉得一塌糊涂 和电动版的 and I got so drunk that I got into a fight
本·富兰克林打了起来[《独立宣言》起草人] with animatronic Ben Franklin.
你为什么要告诉我这个 Why are you telling me this?
可问题是 当我清醒时 Well, the point is, is that when I'm sober,
我并没有暗地里讨厌本·富兰克林 I don't secretly hate Ben Franklin
想都没想过他 or even think about him.
你只是喝醉了打电话给我 So you drunk dialing me,
没什么大不了的 I mean, it's not like a big deal.
你在可怜我 You're pitying me now.
你的表现太反常了 Well, you're acting really weird.
回教室后再说 I'll talk to you in class, okay?
在那之前别烦我了 Just... leave me alone until then.
这是怎么回事 What is going on here?
我的废话测量仪表现异常 My doody meter's going crazy.
行了 停 Okay, cut, cut, cut.
利奥 完全没感觉 Okay, Leo, I'm not feeling it.
你得让我真的相信 你手中握了个想像中的废话测量仪 I really need to believe that you're holding an imaginary doody meter.
问题不在我这里 The problem is not me.
是你还有你的破剧本 It's you and your stupid script.
白痴 Idiot!
就是这股怒气 好好体会 That's the anger. Use it.
拍了一个棒约翰的广告[披萨连锁店] One Papa John's commercial,
他以为自己是克里斯蒂安·贝尔[蝙蝠侠扮演者] and he thinks he's Christian Bale.
你是对的 Look, uh, you were right.
布雷塔现在看到我都怪怪的 Britta is totally weird around me.
-感觉真得很像我看到她裸体了 -这是有前车之鉴的 - It does feel like I saw her naked. - It's a resident premise.
在《谁是老板》中 托尼在片头播字幕时就看到了 Tony even saw Angela naked on the opening credits
安吉拉的裸体 of "Who's the boss"?
那托尼做了什么补救呢 And did Tony do something to fix that?
我不知道 I don't know.
看完片头字幕就没看了 I could never get past the opening credits.
但是《老友记》中的昌德看到瑞秋的裸体后 But when Chandler saw Rachel naked on "Friends",
为了扳成平手 瑞秋就要看昌德的小兄弟 to even the score, Rachel needed to see Chandler's penis.
没错 All right.
那我就露点给布雷塔看看 I'll show Britta my penis.
杰夫 请不要耽误我的时间 Jeff, please don't waste my time.
20分钟后 主演就要回童子军了 I lose my Chang to cub scouts in 20 minutes.
这么说 So, so what?
为了扳成平局 我必须要给她一个醉酒电话 To even the score, I have to drunk dial her?
这真是荒谬至极的单纯幼稚 Isn't that absurdly simplistic?
-这会管用吗 -有可能行 - Would it even work? - Maybe.
不能有任何闪失 Huh, no room for error.
她一定要相信你真得醉了 She'd have to believe it was real.
你曾经表演过醉酒吗 Have you ever acted drunk before?
我能行 I can totally do it.
我没醉 I'm fine.
我能开车 I can drive.
我现在绝对能开车 I can totally drive right now.
车钥匙给我 Give me my keys.
可以了 That's enough--
-等等 -好的 - No, hold on a second. - All right.
兄弟 说真得 钥匙拿来 Guys, seriously, give me my keys.
拍摄完毕 Okay, that's a wrap, people.
4点钟到我的宿舍 We should be at my place at 4:00,
我们可以努力一把 so we can work on this.
不 我不能这么做 Well, I-- No, I can't do that.
原因就是 Here's why.
这是史上最烂计策 Dumbest idea ever.
杰夫 你知道布雷塔就是软弱的代言词 Jeff, you know Britta's defining weakness.
她会放弃我们 然后逃避 She cuts and runs.
如果你没有倾尽全力 失败了 她会离开 If you do this half-assed and fail, she may leave.
那样我们就会失去她 Then we all lose her.
在我的监控下 不允许这种事发生 That's not gonna happen, not on my watch.
没得商量 准备吧 That's a deal breaker. Saddle up.
抱歉我发飙了 刚戒烟 Sorry I lost my cool. I just quit smoking.
这孩子会成为巨星 Kid's gonna be a star.
他是《迷失》中亚洲人的少年版 He's a young "the asian guy" from "Lost".
再试一次 Try it again.
来吧 Come on.
你能行的 You're a big guy.
开始 Action.
喂 布雷塔 Hey, Britta.
你的电话让我思考 思考让我醉倒 Your call got my thinkin' and thinkin' got me drinkin'.
停 太差劲了 Stop. That was terrible.
什么 What?
我可以一个人喝醉 You know, I can get drunk alone
如果真得对演戏有帮助的话 if that's what helps people act.
这就是你的问题所在 杰夫 Well, that's your problem, Jeff.
你一直在人生中扮演"自己"这个角色 You've been acting your whole life, okay?
是时候把扮演的行为停止 It's time to pass that act up
让"自己"来演绎你 and find the actor that's playing you.
你去加州[好莱坞]一定会混得开 Oh, they're gonna love you in California.
你喜欢布雷塔吗 Do you like Britta?
当然 谁会不喜欢 Sure. Who doesn't?
见过她的人当中超过一半不喜欢 Over half the people that meet her.
他们可能因她那空洞的面容而止步 They could be put off by her vacuous mannequin face,
或为她朱迪·福斯特[奥斯卡影后]般的严苛而生畏 and her Jodie Foster severity.
但你不同 But you're different.
她的确不是个很有趣的人 Oh, you know, she's no barrel of monkeys.
她希望人与人之间坦诚 She--she wants everyone to be honest,
但她却自欺欺人 but she lies to herself.
她见过世面 却不了解所见 She's seen the world, but doesn't get it.
她对无关紧要的事情总是力争到底 She has more fights about stuff that doesn't matter
烦过"Youtube"上的回复帖 than a youtube comment section.
她总是热情洋溢 有点傻傻的 She's passionate, which I find stupid,
不过也有点儿意思 but entertaining.
吸引你了 Attractive.
只是一开始 There was only attraction at first
她表现得很难追到手就有点烦人了 because she bothered to play hard to get.
我和蜜雪儿在一起很开心 I'm happy with Michelle.
斯莱特的确比较好伺候 Yeah, Slater is low maintenance.
非常容易哄 Mm. The lowest.
布雷塔有易怒性 不定性 不测性 Britta's irritating, impossible, unpredictable.
她不喜欢你 你喜欢她也没用 And she didn't like you so it felt useless to like her.
斯莱特爱的就是现在的你 没有寄望你什么 Slater likes you how you are, expects nothing from you,
你无需改变 you're safe from change,
但也体会不到热情 and passion.
-你给我看好 -看什么 - Watch it. - Watch what?
透着虚情假意的虚假醉酒电话 A phony drunk dial soaked in phony pity
只是对布雷塔更大的侮辱 that insults Britta even more?
真实的感觉才能有可信的表演 Or... a believable performance informed by feeling?
你知道 You know...
我一直不怀疑你是个好导演 I am sure you're a good director,
但你是个非常差劲的醉酒伙伴 but you're a horrible drinking buddy.
当你像研究变色龙式螳螂 I mean, I can't feel things
一样研究我时 我完全没感觉 with you studying me like a beige praying mantis.
你说得对 You're right.
我以为你不喝酒 I thought you never drank.
马丁·斯科塞斯也会陪罗伯特·德尼罗喝的 Scorsese drank with De Niro.
[分别为著名导演和影星]
不是为了我 是为了观众 It's not for me. For the audience.
[西语 干杯]
同学们 翻开书第 哇 All right, class. Turn to page--Whoa.
看来今天美偶主持和贫民窟的百万富翁[08年电影] Looks like the law firm of Seacrest and Slumdog's
[美偶主持曾在采访影片中小演员时遭遇尴尬]
合伙的事务所歇菜了啊 taking the day off.
又是来自特洛伊和皮尔斯虚幻情人 Another special delivery from Troy and Pierce's
的爱心专递 imaginary lovers?
等等 Wait a minute.
这是给我的 That one's for me.
太好了 All righty.
是普林斯顿大学寄来的 Wow, it's from Princeton.
他们想聘请我去做西语系的 They want to make me associate professor
副教授 of the Spanish Department?
还说工资可以漫天要价 They're telling me I can name my price?
偶的神呐 Oh, my god.
普林斯顿 省省吧 At Princeton? Come on!
你们两个白痴真以为我会信啊 You two idiots really thought I'd fall for this, huh?
这种被我羞辱之后的报复方式 This is your pathetic attempt to punish me
实在够悲剧的 for humiliating you.
不是我们做的 But we didn't do it.
甭狡辩了 Save it!
作为惩罚 As punishment,
鉴于你们明显没有女朋友的事实 because you two obviously don't have any girlfriends,
你们要穿着优雅女套装 you will escort me to the valentine's dance
到情人节舞会上陪伴我 wearing elegant ladies pantsuits.
想得美 Yeah, right.
乖乖照做 不然就等着挂科 You'll do it or you'll fail my class.
你不能这么做 You can't do that.
你不认识我是咋滴 Have you met me?
我说一不二 I mean it.
今晚 你们就是我的砧上肉 Tonight, you are my bitches.
老天 Holy crap.
阿布蒂 Abed.
都下午三点了 It's 3:00.
发生了什么事 What happened?
我就记得你 The last thing I remember is...
你就像那个电影里的女生 you were dancing like that girl
一样跳舞 in that movie...
是叫《留校顽童》吗[他将剧情记成片名了] "The Kids In Detention"?
是《早餐俱乐部》[85年青春片] "Breakfast Club".
我的天 你都对我做了什么 Dear god. What have you done to me?
等等 我给布雷塔打电话了吗 Wait. Did I call Britta?
我手机呢 Where's my phone?
这儿呢 Got it.
你有两通已拨电话 You made two outgoing calls.
一个打给布雷塔 一个打给你女朋友 One to Britta, one to your girlfriend.
我一个都不记得了 I don't remember either of them.
我也是 Neither do I.
我也不记得《早餐俱乐部》里 And I don't remember the name of the girl
那个女生的名字了 in the "Breakfast Club".
马莉 Mary.
玛格利特 Margaret.
莫莉·林沃姆[演员 角色名为克莱尔] Molly Ringworm.
你把我给毁了 You broke me.
还是不敢相信我要穿14号的 I still can't believe I'm a size 14.
我知道12号是有一点紧 I know that 12's a little tight,
但是还是塞得下的 But I could have pulled it off.
你们真就这样任人摆布吗 Are you guys really going through with this?
情非得已 不然就挂科了 We have to. He'll fail us.
不过我们一定会查出那封信是谁写的 Yeah, but we're gonna find out who wrote that letter.
我们有线索 We have leads.
信头的普林斯顿标记是假的 It was written on fake Princeton letterhead.
所以写信人肯定在普林斯顿大学工作 So whoever wrote it worked at Princeton,
信纸用完了 ran out of stationary,
还没来得及去商店买[傻得真可爱] and didn't have time to go to the store.
你们知道不 Um, you guys
什么 What?
女装尺寸普遍偏小 Women's sizes run slimmer.
普通12号的衣服你绝对能穿 I'm sure you're a 12 everywhere that it counts.
现在只要是恭维话 我来者不拒[打击太大了] Well, I'll take every little victory I can get right now.
你看起来真像科特妮·洛芙的老公 Hmm. You look about ready to marry Courtney Love.
[即科特·柯本 之前杰夫曾引用来笑话布雷塔醉酒]
你还真是以牙还牙 有仇必报啊 That's the reverse of my zinger from before.
麻烦小声点 行不 Okay, please stop shouting. All right.
我感觉像那个电视节目里的人[完全没灵感了] I feel like that person in the TV show.
你还记得昨晚打电话给我了吗 Do you remember calling me last night?
记得啊 怎么啦 Yeah. Why?
我们没事了吧 Are we cool?
那确实 Oh, yeah.
坐着吧 醉汉 开始学习吧 Have a seat, drunky brewster. Let's study.
看来平衡关系恢复了 Balance restored, I guess.
参见某电影[天才完全被酒精毁了] Movie reference.
晚上好啊 Hey, there.
情人节快乐 Happy Valentine's Day.
我一直打电话给你 I've been calling you.
我知道 Yeah, I know.
我觉得还是转语音信箱的好 I figured I'd just let it go to voice mail
省得你又打错电话到我手机上 in case you had the wrong number again.
说详细点 Elaborate?
你记不记得曾在凌晨四点打电话给我 Oh, you don't remember calling me at 4:00 in the morning
结果发现我不是布雷塔就挂掉了 and hanging up when you realized I wasn't Britta?
我猜你是不记得了 I guess not.
蜜雪儿 Michelle.
蜜雪儿 Michelle, um...
我本来是打去英国帮你订太妃糖的 I was trying to call Britain to order you toffees.
这听起来很傻 Now that may sound dumb,
但是我还是要傻话实说 But I needed to open with it
这样接下来的真相才不至于更荒唐 to make the truth less ridiculous.
前天晚上 布雷塔喝醉了打电话给我 Two nights ago, Britta drunk dialed me
事情有点尴尬 她情绪很低落 and it embarrassed her and made her sad.
唯一让她开心起来的办法 And the only way for her to get her power back
就是让我喝的够醉 was for me to get believably drunk
然后给她一条同样尴尬的留言 and leave her an equally embarrassing message.
听起来你跟布雷塔的朋友关系 It sure seems like you and Britta are friends
就像我妈跟泳池清洁工的关系一样"纯洁" the way my mom's pool cleaner was my uncle.
-你跟她上过床了吗 -小手都没牵过 - Have you had sex with her? - Not even a little.
最离谱的就是你做的这一切 What doesn't make sense is that you did
只是为了博她一笑 all this work to put a smile on her face,
但看《法律与秩序》时你连冰淇淋都不愿买 But you can't pick up ice cream for "Law & Order" night
因为那样太像两口子了 because it feels too marriage-y.
先不说别的 "胖胖小老公"[香草冰淇淋上覆盖花生酱] First of all, chubby hubby?
这口味也太恐怖了 I mean, could you pick a scarier flavor?
这个我们待会儿再说 Let's talk about this later.
我要去做舞场监督了 I need to chaperone... something.
他在那儿呢 There he is.
我原来觉得会很尴尬 现在完全被吓到了 I thought I'd be embarrassed, now I'm just scared.
我在考虑 我到底有多想要这个语言学分 I'm seriously reconsidering how much I want this language credit.
别忘了我们说的 Remember what we said.
眼泪流下来也要往肚里咽 Never let him see us cry.
没错 来吧 Right. Okay.
一 二 One, two--
-等等 -别脱外套 - Wait! - Keep your coats on.
信是我们寄给昌老师的 We're the ones that sent the letter to Chang.
什么 What?
你们在普林斯顿大学工作 You work-- you work at Princeton?
我们是为他羞辱你们的事打抱不平 We were mad at him for humiliating you.
干的还真不错 Well, nice fix,
特傻和特特傻[出自英国童谣] Tweedle dum and even tweedler dum.
我们会告诉昌老师实情的 Look. we're gonna tell Chang the truth.
后果我们来承担 And we'll pay the price.
等等 Wait.
不能让你们就这么去 We-- we can't make you do that.
他说的没错 No, he's right.
我们得先把衣服脱了 First we gotta get out of these pantsuits
你们穿上再去 and you can put them on.
皮尔斯 事情的起因是 Look, Pierce, this whole thing started
我们俩觉得没有女人关心我们 because you and I were ashamed that
面子上过不去 we didn't have ladies that cared about us.
不过好在 有人关心我们呢 And the good news is, we obviously do.
不好的就是 The bad news is...
作为男人 今晚我们有责任 that it makes it our manly duty
保护她们 to protect them tonight.
我感动的眼泪哗哗的 Oh, that's nice.
但是我们不能让你们这么做 But we really can't let you do that. It's--
他说的没错 No, he's right. He's right.
退后 Step aside.
-咱爷们儿一点 把这事解决了 -好 - Let's handle this like men. - Yes.
女士们 Oh, ladies...
他们会没事的吧 They're gonna be okay, right?
让我带你们好好"奔驰"一把 Get in my Mercedes.
亲爱的 别看 Just look away, baby.
别看了 Just look away.
在等人吗 Looking for someone?
等斯莱特呢 Yeah. Slater.
真好笑 Very funny.
知道吗 你昨晚打电话给我 You know, when you called me last night
邀请我去舞会的时候 我简直大吃一惊 and invited me to the dance, I was shocked.
还很激动 and...thrilled.
你没事吧 Are you okay?
没事 Yeah.
不 有事 No, no. Look,
对不起 不过 I'm sorry, uh, I don't--
我不记得有邀请你参加舞会了 I don't remember asking you to the dance.
什么都不记得了 I don't remember anything.
现在斯莱特知道醉酒电话的事了 And now Slater knows about all the drunk dialing stuff
我都被打进冷宫了 and I'm in the dog house.
如果她知道我邀请你了 我和她就完了 And if she finds out about this, it's over.
对不起 真的很抱歉 So again, I am sorry. I am so, so sorry.
你现在是跟我闹着玩儿吧 And you are messing with me right now, aren't you?
我就知道昨晚打电话的事 I knew you didn't remember anything
你完全不记得了 from that phone call last night.
你精心打扮 就是为了看我出糗吗 You got dressed up just to see me sweat?
相信我 绝对值了 Oh, believe me, you're worth it.
我正监督舞会呢 你们慢慢跳 Sorry, just chaperoning. Enjoy the dance.
等等 蜜雪儿 Wait, Michelle.
杰夫 还有什么好解释的 Jeff, what's left to say?
我 我不知道 Uh, I--I don't know.
我知道 I do.
他昨晚跟我说的 He said it last night.
是这样的 So look,
我真的很喜欢蜜雪儿 I am really into Michelle,
不想把这段感情搞砸了 and I don't wanna screw it up.
她是个完美女友 She's a perfect girlfriend.
我希望你也能如我一样快乐 And I want you to be as happy as me
因为 我们是死党嘛 because you're, like, my favorite friend, so--
不好意思 阿布蒂刚刚做了个"龟脸"[抬眉张大眼] I'm sorry. Abed just made a turtle face.
我要为他说话 In his defense,
阿布蒂做"龟脸"真的很搞笑 Abed's turtle face is really funny.
谢了 布雷塔 Thanks, Britta.
谢谢 Yeah, thanks.
这只是40分钟语音短信的前20秒 That was the first 20 seconds of a 40-minute message.
内容非常充实 Very informative.
情人节快乐 Happy Valentine's Day.
完美男友 Perfect boyfriend.
没错 就是我 Yeah. That's me.
老兄 我真恨不得马上把这套烂衣服给脱了 Man, I cannot wait to get out of these ridiculous outfits.
的确是 Woof, I know. Yeah.
你要干嘛 我车停在这边 What are you doing? I'm parked over here.
那啥 Oh, uh, well, um--
上车 Come on.
这是搞什么鬼 Um, what the hell is this?
我们要去吃冰镇酸奶 We're going to get frozen yogurt.
我不是同志 I'm not gay, man.
只是还有7分钟店就打烊了 They close in seven minutes.
我可以载你去啊 I could have driven you.
你说他讨厌冰酸奶的 You said he hated fro -yo.
赶紧开路 Just drive.
你个淫娃 Slut!