为什么大家都戴那种奇怪的帽子 Why is everyone wearing those hats?
院长又搞什么变态活动了吗 Is the dean planning another ridiculous event,
还是格林德尔帽子协会 or is the Greendale hat club still
还挣扎着想引起关注 struggling to be noteworthy?
你这不就关注了嘛 You're talking about it.
我关注的恶心事儿多着呢 I talk about lots of stuff that annoys me.
-说到院长... -你们好 伙计们 - Speaking of the dean... - Guten tag, homies.
我希望你们都参加"啤酒节" I hope you'll all be attending Oktoberfest.
我们很少有机会庆祝德国文化 It's not often we get to celebrate German culture.
我们也很少有这意愿 It's not often we want to.
-是啊 太小众了 -是的 - Yeah... A little goes a long way. - True.
格林德尔的"啤酒节"的确关注度不高 Greendale's Oktoberfest has never drawn huge crowds,
也许是因为我们人种繁多 probably due to our diversity.
今年 我们加入了新元素 So this year, we are adding some color!
看看吧 Kick it!
你可要特别留意一下 特洛伊 I'm gonna give this to you, Troy.
"机械舞啤酒节" "Pop and locktoberfest."
主题活动是"机械舞马拉松" The central event will be a pop-and-lock-a-thon.
胜者可以侵占波兰 Winner gets to annex Poland.
开玩笑 Kidding!
冠军送一张itunes充值卡 The winner gets an itune gift card.
-好的 -天啊 机械舞比赛 - Okay. - Oh! A break-dance contest.
我们给队伍起个什么名字 What should we name our team?
好吧 让我去壁橱上吊先 Okay. I'm gonna go hang myself in my closet.
同去 I'm comin' with.
只有我发现这个问题吗 Is it me, or is this campus
这学校一天比一天更卡通了 getting more cartoonish every day?
是啊 好激动 Yep. It's exciting.
我在图书馆侧面画了一条隧道 I painted a tunnel on the side of the library.
等涂料干了 我就穿过去 When it dries, I'm going for it.
看到那个家伙了吗 Okay. You see that guy over there?
穿着古奇西服 The one wearing the gucci suit
轻薄羊毛马海毛混织衬衫那个 and the lightweight woven wool-mohair blend?
是我原来的同事 We used to work together.
帅气 他来自你的过去 Cool. So he's from your origins.
来的可真是时候 This is all I need.
打扰 先生 我朋友说你来的真是时候 Excuse me, sir. You're all my friend needs.
你没有微笑 我理解错你的意思了吗 Your mouth isn't curved upwards. Did I misread something?
探戈兄 Ah...Tango?
《怒虎狂龙/Tango & Cash》主角之一 警探
霸王弟 Sundance.
《虎豹小霸王/Butch Cassidy and the Sundance Kid 》主角之一 罪犯
-我们跟不同的合伙人 -明白 - We worked with different partners. - Got it.
你来格林德尔干什么 What brings you to Greendale?
我是个老师 I'm a teacher.
等下 这个更丢人 Wait. That's worse than the truth.
我是个学生 I'm a student.
我可不会嘲笑你的 Hey, I'm in no position to judge.
我是来参加戒毒互助会的 I'm here for an N.A. Meeting, so...
-戒毒互助会吗 -记得你问过 - Narcotics anonymous? - Remember when you asked
我的秘诀 我说是瑜伽 我说谎了 for my secret, I said yoga? I lied.
-我是阿布蒂 -你好 - I'm Abed. - Hey.
阿布蒂 这位是艾伦·康纳 Abed, this is Alan Connor.
我和这家伙 This guy and I
曾在法庭把那些公诉人打得落花流水 used to wipe the courtroom floor with prosecutors.
地方检察官说我们是垃圾虫 D.A. called us the litterbugs,
我们帮多少人渣重见天日啊 we put so much trash back out on those streets.
来吧 让我摸你 Come here, come here!
-你还怕抓痒吗 -快停手 - You still ticklish? - Stop that!
我们去喝一杯吧 Hey, hey, hey. Let's get a drink, huh?
-你能喝吗 -可以 我不吸毒了 - Are you allowed? - Yeah. I quit doing blow,
又没说戒酒 not being rad.
那走吧 All right, let's do it.
等下 杰夫不能去 他还有课 Wait. Jeff can't go. He has class.
可是那工装裤可不同意 Well, those cargo pants would suggest otherwise.
你怎么变成这个样子了 What has this place done to you?
你不会懂的 Ah. You have no idea.
帽子俱乐部 Hat club!
现在懂一点了吧 Now you have some idea.
本字幕由 YYeTs人人影视 原创翻译制作 仅供学习 禁止用于任何商业盈利行为 更多影视更新 请登陆 www.YYeTs.net
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翻译：大卫熊 夕橙 yank121 独醉
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校对：米粒 时间轴：崽猪
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后期：鱼骨头 监制：米粒
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《废柴联盟》 第二季 第二集 iTunes 720p版本调教：Tears
-这么说 -说什么 - So... - So?
每个参加过机械舞马拉松的人都知道 Anyone that's ever been in a team pop-and-lock-a-thon
想要赢得比赛至少要有7个人 knows you need at least seven people to stand a chance.
-我们有7个 -有吗 - We have seven. - Oh, do you?
我可是听说翁格忙着 Word has it on campus that winger's too busy
和他的酷酷律师好友把酒言欢 hanging out with his cool new lawyer friend.
你的消息真过时 Slow news day.
二者都是脱口秀主持人
你模仿卡森就模仿成这样 That's your carson?
我模仿的约翰·斯图尔特 John Stewart.
-晕死 -听着 我们会答复你的 - You depress me. - Look, we'll get back to you.
别考虑太久 All right, well, don't take too long.
别忘了结束动作 And don't rip off this exit.
-杰夫在哪 -显然是和艾伦在一起 - Where is Jeff? - Obviously hanging with Alan.
他俩就像是连体婴 Those two are like siamese twins
俩人共用手机套呢 attached at the cell phone holster.
我还没见过他 I haven't met him yet.
杰夫找到以前的好友 我们不为他高兴吗 Shouldn't we be happy that Jeff found an old friend?
我们担心的是杰夫和艾伦 Our concern is that alan is to jeff
就像1990年电影《不良影响》里 what Rob Lowe was to James Spader
罗伯·劳和詹姆斯·斯派德的关系一样 in the 1990 film Bad Influence.
他是不良影响 He's a bad influence.
你看过那部电影 You saw it?
伙计们 Hey, uh, guys.
我今晚会晚一点 Uh, I'm gonna be a little bit late today.
艾伦和我要去酒吧喝一杯 Alan and I are gonna take a quick sidebar.
也许是其他"吧" Mmm, or any bar.
比布雷塔模仿的强多了 Oh, he's got Britta down!
-你看起来很眼熟 -很有可能 - You look familiar. - That's possible.
你或其他人曾经有过工伤的经历吗 Have you or someone you know been injured at work?
是的 一艘捕虾船撞了我的表亲 Yes! A shrimp boat ran over my cousin.
很严重 给我打电话哦 That's serious. Call me.
杰夫 你要尊重大家的时间啊 And, Jeff, you need to be more respectful of our time.
雪瑞 如果我以基督徒的身份 Shirley, if killed a man,
杀了一个人 你会原谅我吗 as a christian, would you forgive me?
我会考虑的 I would.
所以说 要么对你来说 Then either that man's life is
时间比一个人的生命更重要 worth less than your time,
否则 我是可以迟到的 or it's okay for me to be late.
厉害 Ha ha! No!
身手依然矫健 You still got the moves, man.
如果他们给头脑游戏大师颁奖的话 If they gave away awards for mind games,
奖杯形状肯定是杰夫·翁格在和大脑嘿咻 the statue'd be Jeff Winger doing it to a brain.
拜托 杰夫水平很一般的 Come on, Jeff's bush league.
我可是主讲过操纵大脑的研讨会 I gave seminars on manipulation.
我可以侵入一个人的灵魂 I could reach into a man's soul
轻轻一拨就能使之瓦解 and unravel it with one tug.
牛逼 拿我试试 Cool. Hit me.
-你个秃驴 -你不也是 - You're bald. - So are you.
我要杀了你 I'll kill you, you--
-过来啊 -无效审判 - Come here! - Mistrial.
走吧 Ha ha ha! Come on.
老子有毛的 I have hair.
主啊 我有毛的 Father, I have hair.
就凭一个偷税案吗 On a tax evasion case.
是啊 Yeah.
老天 我真怀念讨论这些啊 God, I miss talking about this stuff!
你该去办公室看看 Well, you should visit the office.
是吗 我被辞退时那么逊 Right. I can't show my face there
我才不要再出现在办公室 after getting busted like that.
杰夫 你知道一个人欺骗州律师公会 Jeff, you know what lawyers call someone
在法学院入学考试上作假 who defrauds the state bar,
又混进律师事务所 cheats on his LSATs,
这种人叫什么吗 and cons his way into a firm?
绝世无双最佳律师 Best...Lawyer...Ever.
真的吗 Seriously?
明晚 办公室派对 Hey, tomorrow night. Office party.
我邀请你做我的客人 You're my guest.
哦 不要 Oh. Naw.
拜托 你刚不是说挺怀念的吗 Come on, you just said you missed it.
没错 I do.
我真的真的挺怀念的 I really, really do.
艾伦跟我们比多点啥呢 What does Alan have that we don't?
杰夫香肠专用屁屁 A butt for Jeff's weiner.
我的意思是 我们也都有屁屁 I mean, we all have butts too.
我们有屁屁 但并不是专门给 We have butts. Just not for the same thi--
我想说的是他俩搞基 I'm trying to say they're gay.
我不喜欢他们举杯共饮千杯少 Well, I don't like how much drinking and carousing they do.
这只是在麻醉自己而已 It's a gateway to narcotics.
麻醉 我知道我是怎么认识艾伦的了 Narcotics! I know how I know Alan!
但是我不能说 But I'm not allowed to say.
也就是说你在戒毒互助会见过他 Which means that you met him in narcotics anonymous.
不能说你还提他干嘛 Why bring it up if you're not allowed?
因为有一次会上 Because...he said something at a meeting
他说过自己做过的坏事 about something bad he did.
而且受害者也许是杰夫 And he might have done it to Jeff,
但是我不能说是啥事 but I can't say what it is.
好吧 你已经从做作进化到烦人了 Okay. You've gone from precious to annoying.
要不你别大声说出来但我们可以猜猜看 What if you don't say it out loud but we guess?
-像是你来比划我来猜 -大家一起吗 - Like charades? - With this group?
我来围观 I'm watching.
四个词 Four words.
艾伦害杰夫被取消律师资格 "Alan got Jeff disbarred."
拜托 那些瘾君子一旦吸多了 Oh, please, those junkies weren't thinking about rules
才不管什么规矩呢 when they were shooting up scag.
-杰夫 艾伦出卖了你 -出卖 - Jeff, Alan narced on you! - Narced?
但是他貌似很没有可能做那种事 Hmm. But he's like way too primo for that,
[最标新立异的摇滚明星之一]
弗兰克·扎帕 Frank Zappa.
我认为就是他把你告发到州律师公会的 I think he turned you in to the state bar.
我曾在某个戒毒会上见他正吹嘘此事 I was in an N.A. Meeting, and he bragged about it.
他没认出我来 因为我头发长了 He doesn't recognize me, because my hair's longer,
我的皮肤干净清透 我 My skin's clearer, I--
-我还瘦了很多 -安妮 - I've lost a lot of weight. - Annie.
他说过他告发的我 He said he turned me in?
他说过他寄过一封电子邮件 He said he sent an email
致使一位与他竞争的同事被解雇了 that got a rival coworker fired.
差不多跟你被解雇的时间相符 It was around the time you got caught.
我知道《嘎巴宝宝》里没教过这个 I know they never covered this on Yo, Gabba Gabba,
儿童节目
但这种事叫做偶然事件 But that's called circumstantial.
还有其他无聊的阴谋论吗 Any other meaningless conspiracy theories?
是的 你知道Go-Gurt就是酸奶吗[挤压装酸奶] Yes. Did you know that Go-Gurt is just yogurt?
你知道心理医生 You know what a therapist
把这种关系叫做什么吗 calls this kind of a relationship, right?
金矿 A gold mine.
共存 Codependent.
你们不想让我快乐 You guys don't want me to be happy.
你们就想让我渴求你们 You want me to need you.
让我觉得有点患上幽闭恐怖症了 It's getting a little claustrophobic.
我曾如野马脱缰全速奔跑在无边旷野上 I used to run full-speed through the boundless wilderness,
现在却困在动物园里 and now I'm in the zoo
抬头就是墙纸 呼吸的都是陈腐之气 where the horizon is wallpaper and the air is stale
生活毫无刺激感 and nothing is ever at stake.
也就是说 我们不够酷 In other words, we're not cool.
我没这么说过 也许你们听过 I never said that. You may have heard it.
也许我也这么想过 也许这是真的 I may have thought it, and it may be true.
但是我从未这么说过 But I never said it.
杰夫 明晚我们会在 Jeff, will we see you
机械舞马拉松中见到你吗 tomorrow night at the pop-and-lock-a-thon?
不 阿布蒂 我要去参加酷酷老东家 No, Abed, I'm going to a cool party
举办的一个酷酷派对 at my cool former law firm
那时我的生活简直酷到家 from when my life was cool.
好啦 你可以加入 Fine. You can be on the team.
新交易 New deal.
如果我们赢了 我要加入学习小组 If we win, I get to be in the study group.
前所未有的刺激 The stakes have never been higher.
我只是想感谢大家的到来 I just wanna thank everybody for coming.
要说当我成为一名律师时 You know, when I became a lawyer,
我曾有个梦想 I had a dream.
我曾梦想有一天我会成为事务所的头头 I had a dream that one day I'd be head of a firm
这样就没有人会议论 so nobody would be able to talk about
我手上这个诡异的大洞 the big, weird hole in my hand.
我知道大家都在背后讨论这个 I know everybody talks about it behind my back,
不过没关系 换我也会这样 and that's okay. You know, I would.
不过还好你们不会盯着看 What's great, though, is that you don't stare
或是问个不停 or ask any questions.
作为对你们的克制的酬谢 And as a reward for your restraint,
给你们准备了小把戏 Got a little something for ya.
就这么着 There.
应该能让你笑到圣诞节了 That oughta keep you goin' to Christmas.
大家吃好喝好玩好 Everybody have fun tonight!
换做别人的话会戴手套的吧 Anyone else with that hand would wear a glove.
他却用它掌控全局 He controls a room with it.
绝对是大师 He's the master.
他绝对欣赏你 Well, he sure is a fan of yours.
那个 Oh, um...
你跟他聊的时候 Hey, when you talk to him,
能不能提一下我 will you mention me?
他老是无视我 不让我做合伙人 He keeps passing me over for partner.
艾伦 你邀请我来是别有所图吧 Alan, did you invite me here with an ulterior motive?
老天 我真想念这儿 God, I miss this place!
上帝啊 简直满屋子翁格 God, it's a sea of Wingers.
这里充满了道德模糊的臭味 This whole place reeks of moral ambiguity.
其实 是我放的 抱歉 Actually, that was me. I apologize.
现在 你们是第一次踏入上流社会 Now, you guys are new to high society,
所以只要 跟着我学 So just... follow my lead,
就会万事大吉了 Everything will be fine.
首先 你们怎么会在这里 First, why are you here?
其次 我不关心 快出去 Second, I don't care. Leave.
事实上 杰夫 我们是受邀前来 As a matter of fact, Jeff, we were invited.
谁会这么干呢 Why would anyone do that?
嘿 你们来啦 Hey, you guys made it!
快进来 Come on in.
好了 在大家还没有出更多丑之前 Okay, before this gets more embarrassing,
你们这琢磨的是什么鬼主意 What is your misguided plan?
就对你的朋友进行诽谤此事 To apologize to you for casting aspersions
跟你道歉 on your friend.
并向你展示我们也可以很酷 And to show you we can be cool.
嘿 那边是杰夫·翁格吗 Hey! Is that Jeff Winger?
找到安妮然后赶紧离开 Find Annie and leave.
泰德 你好啊伙计 Ted! Hey, man!
最近怎么样 What's goin' on?
一旦安妮搞到艾伦的办公室房间号 Once Annie gets Alan's office number,
你们闯进去 侵入他的电子邮件 You guys break into his office, hack into his emails,
找到他陷害杰夫的证据 and find proof that he screwed Jeff over.
四楼 470房间 Fourth floor. 470.
起初他说是69 First he said it was 69.
真想把脑子里的画面洗掉 I wanna rub Purell on my brain.
大家都很想你 杰夫 You are so missed here, Jeff.
如果这里能有五个人有你的种 If we had five guys around here with your balls,
就不需要三十个律师了 We wouldn't need 30 lawyers.
是啊 那得有个好医生才行 True. But we'd need a good doctor.
泰德 别再勾引我的妞了 Ted, stop hittin' on my date.
开玩笑呢 我们可以分享的 I'm kidding. We can share.
我要脑袋 I get the head!
我喜欢里面的大脑 I love the brain in there!
我要吃这个 I'll eat it.
大家注意下 杰夫·翁格来了 Hey, everybody, Jeff Winger's here!
欢迎 Hey!
我们是不是应该通知一下谁 Shouldn't we notify someone
说咱们队没法去参加机械舞马拉松了 that our team's not gonna make it to the pop-and-lock-a-thon?
你还真以为会有人关心吗 You actually think anybody cares?
石南花嘻哈队前来登记 Um, checking in for the Heather pop and locklears.
好的 其他团队成员呢 Okay. And, um... Where's the rest of your team?
他们会来的 Oh, they'll be here.
我想你可以自己开始跳 I suppose you're allowed to start by yourself,
但如果没有队友 你是不可能获胜的 but you won't stand a chance if you don't have someone--
他们会来的 They'll be here!
我带了些作案工具来 I brought stuff people use for capers.
吸盘 Suction cup.
信用卡 Credit card.
氯仿[麻醉剂] Chloroform.
如果信用卡不起作用 就用氯仿 The credit card doesn't work, the chloroform does.
安妮 回去帮我们放风 Annie, go back and keep lookout.
为什么是我放风 为什么不是你们 Why me lookout? Why not you guys?
因为如果有人来这里 'cause if someone comes up here,
溜门撬锁二人组就要去蹲监狱了 Kanye and Kumar get taken to jail.
-而你则会被约去吃晚饭 -别这样 - You get taken to dinner. - You guys!
我可是这个小组里最聪明的人 I am the smartest one in this whole group,
却只能当个诱饵 分散别人的注意 And all I've been used for is bait and distraction.
继续你们愚蠢的任务吧 Go on your stupid mission.
希望你们搞砸 I hope it sucks.
-她说什么 -我不知道 - What did she say? - I don't know.
我就听到suck[搞砸/吮吸] All I heard was suck.
艾伦还没有成为合伙人 这让我很吃惊 I'm surprised that Alan hasn't made partner yet.
没开掉他就不错了 I'm surprised I haven't fired him.
为什么 我是说他的胜利记录比我还好 Why? I mean, he's got a better win record than I do.
他是个没有骨气的信托基金屌人 He's a spineless trust fund jagoff.
我给你说 杰夫 I'll tell you what, jeff.
你是我所雇过的最棒的骗子 You're the best liar I ever employed.
如果你看着我的眼睛 If you can look me in the eye
告诉我你真的喜欢艾伦 and tell me you actually like Alan,
我就让他做完全责任合伙人 I'll make him a full partner.
我这辈子只喜欢过一个人 Well, I only ever really liked one person.
我妈妈 My mom.
她喜欢我老爸 And she liked my dad.
一切归于尘土 监护权也尘埃落定后 And after all the dust and custody was settled,
我真正崇拜 不是喜欢 是崇拜 The guy I really admired-- not liked, admired--
就是穿着帅气衣服 Was the lawyer leaving the courthouse
开天蓝色梅赛德斯奔驰SLK in the great-looking suit
离开法院的律师 and a sky blue mercedes slk.
-好车 -好工作 - Sweet ride. - Sweet job.
好生活 他不在乎 Sweet life. He didn't care.
他也顾不上 He couldn't care.
他越不关心 他就越优秀 And the less he cared, the better he was.
我们是特殊的人物 We are a special breed
因为我们要站在更高角度看世界 because we rise above the sloppy stuff
寻找事物的底线 and look at the bottom line.
你想要喜欢你的员工们吗 You wanna like your employees?
开个美发沙龙好了 Open a hair salon.
你想要赢得诉讼吗 You wanna win?
那就让艾伦入伙 Make Alan partner.
青出于蓝而更甚 The student has become the master.
谢谢你 杰夫 Thank you, Jeff.
你让我想做个更烂的人 You make me wanna be a worse man.
顺便说一下 就算你不能在这里负责案件 By the way, just 'cause you can't work cases here
也可以来工作嘛 doesn't mean you can't work.
你可以做个顾问 You can always be a consultant.
泰德 这可太好了 Ted...That would be amazing.
失陪一下 Oh. I'll be right back.
我都不知道还有规矩 I didn't know they had rules.
杰夫 你肯定认识菲利普吧 Hey, Jeff. I'm sure you know Philip.
你知道吗 Did you know
如果我每个月都和菲利普睡一觉 that if I sleep with philip once a month,
我就可以随时去住他在里奥的海滨别墅 I can use his beach house in Rio whenever I want?
太棒了 Wow.
你俩这交易真不错 You guys are really on to something.
我想你发现了世界上最新的一个职业 I think you found the world's newest profession.
伙计们 你们知道吗 Guys, guys, did you know
那个抢我丈夫的贱女 I actually have a civil case
据说我可以对她进行民事诉讼 against that bitch that stole my husband?
雪瑞 别去起诉脱衣舞女郎 Shirley, don't sue a stripper.
-为什么不能 -她是个脱衣舞女郎 - Why not? - She's a stripper.
生活已经起诉了她 她败诉了 Life sued her, and she lost.
皮尔斯跑哪去了 Where's Pierce?
老天 我为什么要去担心他 Jeez, why am I even worried about him?
你们知道在印度尼西亚的一个岛上 Did you know there's an island in Indonesia
你是可以捕猎人类的吗 where you can hunt people?
我们得好好谈谈 We need to talk.
就是这封邮件了 打印吧 I think this is it. Print it.
打扰一下 'scuse me.
你们是谁 这不是你们的办公室 Who are you guys? This is not your office.
我可以解释 I can explain.
让我解释给你听 Let me explain.
神啊 Oh, my god!
-我不知道该怎么办了 -我的天 - I didn't know what to do. - Oh, my god!
我通常都不会插手现实 I usually have one foot out of reality,
而现在就连我也吓坏了 and even I'm freaking out right now.
你用氯仿放倒了门卫 You chloroformed the janitor?
别冲我大喊大叫的 是你们被抓住了 Stop yelling at me! You're the ones that got caught!
是你在大喊大叫 You're the one who's yelling!
我们有大麻烦了 我们得做点什么 We're in big trouble! We have to do something!
我不知道该怎么办了 Oh, I don't know what to do.
我整个大脑都在哭泣 My whole brain is crying!
伙计们 伙计们 Guys, guys, guys!
我有个办法 Hey, hey, I have an idea.
可能听起来有点怪 不过请相信我 Okay, it may sound a little weird, but trust me.
发生什么事情了 What's...Happening?
我们都被氯仿放倒了 Oh! We all got chloroformed!
有人用氯仿迷昏了我们 Somebody chloroformed all of us.
现在我们又一起清醒过来 And now we're regaining consciousness together.
我不明白 她是谁 I don't understand. Who's she?
她为什么拿着抹布 Why is she holding a rag?
好吧 这主意太垃圾了 Okay, that was the worst idea ever.
我们现在能直接逃走了吗 Can we please just run away now?
-好 -好 - Yeah. - Yeah.
抱歉 Sorry.
已经过了四个小时了 It is the fourth straight hour,
本·昌仍在孤军奋战 And Ben Chang is still on his own.
大家都在想 究竟是什么让他 One can only imagine what is driving him to...
不断挑战自己的极限 push himself to such limits!
我全身疼 My body hurts.
全身疼 my body hurts.
我们和你的酷友相处和谐 你嫉妒了? You jealous because we're fitting in with your cool friends?
不 你们变身让我看着难受 No. I'm distracted, watching you mutate.
布雷塔 你不是站街女郎 Britta, you're not a whore.
雪瑞 耶稣宽宏忍让 Shirley, Jesus turned the other cheek.
不会去索取赔偿 He didn't garnish wages.
皮尔斯 还需要我告诉你吗 Pierce, do I even need to say this?
把人当猎物的运动是不对的 It is bad to hunt man for sport.
厉害 Bad ass.
这是艾伦发给律师公会的电邮 This is the email that Alan sent the bar association.
杰夫 是他出卖你的 He stabbed you in the back, Jeff.
他是个损友 He's a bad friend.
你说的对 You're right.
他是损友 He is a bad friend.
但他是个好律师 But he is a good lawyer.
我非常感谢 Now, I appreciate
你们的关爱 you guys caring,
但你们要明白 我不会关爱别人 but you have to understand that I don't.
关爱是律师的致命伤 Caring is lethal around here.
是绝症 It's--it's a disease.
你们以关爱为本 我不是 You guys have it. I don't.
如果你们真是对我关爱有加 So if you do care about me,
别把"关爱"传染给我 don't infect me.
现在 Now,
去争取"机械舞马拉松"的冠军吧 go win that pop-and-lock-a-thon.
周一见了 各位 I'll see you Monday.
感觉象灵魂从指间溜走 It's like watching a soul slip through our fingers.
但我们还能做些什么呢 But what more can we do?
你还没完了是吧 Would you stop?
探戈兄 Tango!
兄弟 真不知你怎么办到的 I don't know how you did it, man...
站在你面前的可是公司的下任合伙人哦 But you're looking at the firm's next partner.
如果我不是拼命压住了自己的双重好奇心 If I wasn't actively repressing my bi-curiosity,
我一定把你那漂亮的嘴唇吻个够 I would kiss you full on your beautiful mouth.
好说 也许有天你可以还我这个人情 Well, maybe you can return the favor one day.
也许 现在就可以还你人情 Maybe...I can return it right now.
你可能知道 You probably know
是公司的人告发你的 that it was someone here at the firm who turned you in.
老天 真难开口 God, this is really hard.
艾伦 没事 Alan... It's okay.
告诉我吧 You can tell me.
是汤普森 It was Thompson.
-汤普森? -是的 - Thompson. - Yeah.
领养了三个迷途少年 Thompson that adopted three at-risk teens
并且捐肾给临时工的汤普森 and donated his kidney to a temp.
做秀给人看的 All an act.
要不怎么你前脚走 他后脚就辞职了 Yeah. Why do you think he quit right after you left?
他妻子去世了 Well, his-- his wife died.
她死了吗 杰夫 Did she...Jeff?
真死了吗 Did...She?
话说回来 恭喜你了 Anyway...Congrats.
我们去和菲尔喝几杯吧 Hey, let's go do some shots with Phil, huh?
你去吧 我... No, you go ahead. I, uh...
我还有点事 I think I caught something...
要回格林德尔 at--at Greendale.
大学美眉 明鸟 College chicks. I get ya!
坏小子 You're bad!
好痛 It hurts!
加油 好痛 Shamone...It hurts!
本 你需要换个舞姿哦 Ben, you need to switch up your moves.
特洛伊·巴恩斯终于来救场了 Ohh, did my eyes could see Troy Barnes checking in for the save.
我的妈呀 Oh, my god!
只剩两队啦 Only two teams left.
罂粟锁舞袜队 The poppy lockstockings,
石南花嘻哈队 and the heather pop and locklears!
-特洛伊 怎么了 -不知道 - Troy, what's wrong? - I don't know.
我的心思不在这儿 My heart's just not in it.
也许我们应该退出 Maybe we should quit.
谁在乎这个比赛啊 I mean, who even cares about this anyway?
看来杰夫·翁格接棒上场了 Next step, looks like Jeff Winger.
杰夫瑞 你回来啦 Oh, Jeffrey, you're back!
-想我了吗 -怎么这么晚才来 - Did you miss me? - Took you long enough.
这才像样 Now we got it.
太棒了 Hey! Yes!
杰夫瑞 你是不是狠揍了艾伦那张二五仔的脸 Jeffrey, did you punch Alan in his rotten face
-然后摔门而出 -当然没有了 - and then storm out? - Hell, no.
那家伙还有利用价值 That guy's useful to me.
多亏了你们 现在那个刚当上合伙人的 Thanks to you, I've now got leverage
懦夫兼社交白痴对我相当依仗 over a spineless jag that just made partner.
那里可是我的理想工作地 That is the place I want to work.
但抱团 我还是宁愿和酷友在一起 But I prefer to hang out with cool people,
有关爱之心的酷友 People so cool... They care.
现在 扯线公仔式 And now...The puppet.
杰夫瑞 Jeffrey!
翁格 舞场上不准停止舞动 Ah, no parking on the dance floor, Winger.
我是很认真的 你出局了 No, I'm serious. You're disqualified.
冠军是罂粟锁舞袜队 The winners are the poppy lockstockings!
不要啊 Noooooo!
我嘻哈 我锁舞 I been popping and locking
扭了五个小时 for five hours,
你们一来就前功尽弃 and you threw it all away!
比赛并不重要 The contest doesn't matter.
重要的是我们拥有彼此 相互扶持 What's important is we have each other.
那么 我可以进入你们的学习小组了吗 Then...Can I be in your study group?
这个嘛 约定不是这样哦 Well, that wasn't the deal.
我们输了 所以... We lost, so...
我们跳的太绝了 That was dope, what we did.
真的很不错 That was so good!
扯线公仔式也不错 那动作... The puppet too! The puppet was so...
跳的时候我的踝关节扭着了 I rolled my ankle during that.
-是嘛 -扭到了吗 - Aw! - Twisted it?
伤了也值得 It was worth it, though.
他太煞风景了 You know what, he's bringing us down.
把他挪走吧 可以把他挪走吗 Let's move him. Can we move him?
这边 特洛伊 Psst! Troy!
是我 It's me.
阿布蒂 Abed?
我过来了 I made it through!
现在我是卡通人物了 I'm a cartoon now.
这不可能 That's impossible.
这里一切皆有可能 动物可以讲话 Nothing's impossible in here. Animals can talk.
你的心脏是心形的 Your heart is shaped like a heart.
馅饼的香味可以让你飘起来 And the smell of pie can make you float.
特洛伊 你要相信 You have to believe, Troy.
等等 你没必要相信 Wait! You don't have to believe.
我不相信 I didn't.
可能我给他留下了心灵创伤 I may have done some damage there.