别忘了 假血颜料任意取用 Remember, you guys can have dip too,
不要大意 和橡胶蜘蛛 and don't be afraid to play with the...
玩个尽兴吧 ruuubber spiiider!
我想再问一遍 I'll ask again...
真的不能带自制点心过来吗 Are you sure I can't bring anything?
我搞不懂 I don't understand.
正式派对之前 We're having a party,
我们为什么要另开派对 before we're going to the real party?
有时候 你们年轻人 Sometimes, I think you young people
就喜欢编些乱七八糟的 are just making this crap up.
这叫做"派前派对" It's a pre-party!
随和温馨 It's informal, intimate,
只为我们 and just for us.
我跟你们说过不用化装的 And I told you guys you didn't have to dress up.
你打来电话时 我们正好穿着化装服 Oh, we were wearing this when you called.
等我们真化装起来 绝不会这么正常 Yeah, when we dress up, you'll know it.
你的播放列表里只有幽灵乐队 There's nothing in your playlist but spooky party,
甲壳虫汁 还有电台之声 the beetlejuice soundtrack, and NPR podcasts.
好呀 就听这些吧 Ooh! We could listen to one of those!
这里有米歇尔·诺里斯 I have Michele Norris
采访埃罗尔·莫里斯的音频 interviewing Errol Morris.
不担心 没有互采 Don't worry, they address it.
我们快点结束吧 Okay, let's make this quick.
今晚还有三个造型要试呢 I got three more polite appearances to make tonight.
怎么 我扮的是《速度与激情》帅男 What? I'm one of the three Fast and Furious guys.
帅男很多 你扮哪一个 Which one?
没注意 这种脑残片我从来不看 Oh, I don't know. I don't watch that shallow crap.
只是借用扮相把个妹 I just pick a costume girls will like.
杰夫 能和你简单说两句吗 Jeff, can I have a quick conversation with you?
肯定不止一两句 但我不坚守希望 Doubtful, but I support the dream.
还记得吗 上周我拿了心理学课的问卷 Remember last week, when I made you guys fill out
发给你们做匿名人格测验 those anonymous personality tests for my psych class?
千万别告诉我 你又把问卷掉在雨坑里了 Listen, if you dropped them in another puddle--
不 我依照作业要求统计出了结果 No, I processed the results, as per my assignment.
结果发现 杰夫 我们中存在一位 And, Jeff, one of our friends is...
重度心理病患 deeply disturbed.
不给糖就放院长 Trick or Dean!
请记得光临校餐厅 参与万圣节舞会 Don't forget to come by our Halloween scare-tacular dance,
今晚9点半 "剩蛋"揭幕 starting in the cafeteria at 9:30.
是我特意把灯光调成闪动 Also, I had the lights rigged to flicker
烘托万圣灵异气氛 because it's Halloween!
灯都闪了一周了 It's been happening for a week.
万圣周嘛 Halloween week!
这么说灯要到11月1号才能恢复 So the lights will work on November 1st?
万圣... All saint's day...
月 Month!
你是开玩笑吧 I'm sorry, you were about to get ridiculous?
不信你看 Look!
有一份问卷反馈结果 One of the tests came back
75题中有70道亮红灯 with 70 out of 75 red flags
表明有极端人格障碍 for an extreme personality disorder.
极端啊 杰夫 Extreme, Jeff!
比极品多力多滋还极端 Like a dorito?
就是一包反社会多力多滋 A sociopathic dorito.
蒙牛牧场杀人狂 好酷 A cool ranch lunatic.
丧心病狂 可不是好事 Only instead of zest, Jeff,
学习小组中有位成员 One member of our study group has...
有杀人倾向 homicidal tendencies.
我倒觉得 学习小组中有位成员 I think one member of our study group
心理学学疯了 is an overzealous psych major.
说不定你把结果"谱雷塌"了 You probably just Britta'd the test results somehow.
胡说 我检查过了 No. I double-checked them.
慢着 Wait.
大家竟然用我的名字 Are people using my name
来比喻"毛毛躁躁" to mean "Make a small mistake"?
是啊 Yes.
本字幕由YYeTs人人影视 原创翻译制作 仅供学习 禁止用于任何商业盈利行为 更多影视更新 请登陆 www.YYeTs.com
■
翻译：天蜗独 如狼似虎赛太公 老涵 山炮
■
校对：小独 时间轴：六水
■
后期：鱼骨头 总监：小独
■
《废柴联盟》 第三季 第五集 iTunes版本调教：Tears
速度开始激情结束 Let's make this party fast and furious,
本着这条开完派对 in that order.
我蛮想去舞会的 Yeah, I want to go to the dance.
听说院长从军方搞来玉米饼卷肉 免费发放 I heard the dean's got free taco meat from the army.
去舞会倒也可以 We can go to the dance in a bit.
但不如 我们先讲两个恐怖故事吧 But first, why don't we tell some scaaary stories?
好呀 Good!
我先来 讲述一个无辜人们 I'll start with a story about a horrible fate
惨遭不幸的故事 befalling innocent people,
我想看到每个人的反应 And then I'm curious to get individual reactions.
从前 Once upon a time,
有一对孤男寡女 在深夜寂林中 there was a couple in a car in the woods
耳鬓厮磨 making out or something.
我好像听见了怪声 I think I heard something.
那是我心潮澎湃的轰响 It's just the sound of my heart, baby.
今晚播报 新闻提要 In the news tonight, top story:
精神病院一囚犯今日越狱 an escaped convict from the asylum has escaped,
精神状况不稳定 不可理喻 and he's mental and he's on the loose and stuff.
天哪 听着好危险 Oh, my god. That sounds dangerous.
哎呀 这人不能怎样 Oh, I'm sure it's no biggie,
但我可欲火难熬了 but I am a horny man.
戏才做一半 I'm only half-present.
此人最后一次目击 是在密林中 He was last seen in the woods and has a thingy for a hand,
断臂一只 装有铁钩手 a hook thing where his hand should be.
-大家懂的 -感觉真蛮危险 - You know what I mean. - That sounds dangerous.
服了你 我这就出去看看 Fine, I'll get out and look.
看完就要专心和我亲热了 But then I'm entitled to sex.
我被他的铁钩手刺中了 I'm getting stabbed with his hook hand thing.
天哪 不 Oh, my god! No!
被我说中了 I was right!
女人尖叫连连 难施援手 And the woman was screaming and screaming
男人就被杀了 and the man got killed.
-阿布蒂 -怎么 - Abed? - Yep?
你听完这故事 有何感受 How did that story make you feel?
-不屑 -这反应好奇怪 - Embarrassed. - That's an odd reaction.
不奇怪 Seems fair.
哪点让你不屑了 What embarrassed you about it?
人物塑造不入我的眼 I didn't care about the characters.
不入您法眼 Didn't care about them?
蠢到家了 They were stupid.
他们故意以身犯险 They deliberately put themselves in danger,
明明收到警告了 and, when they were warned about it,
那男人居然还下车 the guy got out of the car.
你的意思是 他太蠢了 Do you believe because he was stupid
所以活该炮灰 he deserved to die?
这算哪门子派对啊 What the hell kind of party is this?
我另辟蹊径地提出 I suppose, from a creative standpoint,
个别人物就是炮灰 some characters deserve to die.
这种人物缺乏常识 没有基本的生存本能 Ones that lack common sense or even basic survival instinct.
你的故事并不恐怖 因为人物的抉择与观众相去径庭 Your story's not scary because the characters
人们听了不会有代入感 are making choices the audience wouldn't make.
再说 主角要聪明些才好看 打个比方 Plus, you need a smarter lead. Here, like this.
深山老林中 月黑风高 长夜冷凄 It's a dark, cold night in the woods.
设定一个小木屋 传统场景 We establish a traditional log cabin,
然后镜头切到 then cut to--
到了 我租了一幢小木屋 Here we are, a log cabin I rented so we could be
保障我们幽会安全 早就不是50年代 intimate in safety, because it's not the 50s,
车内吻颈 撩拨起火的俗套就省了吧 so we don't have to park a car and neck at inspiration point.
说得有理 That makes sense.
"智"令"欲"昏 I'm turned on by how logical you are.
你的亮丽秀发 对称脸庞 也让我浑身舒爽 I'm comforted by your shiny hair and facial symmetry.
来吧 我刚刷完牙 Well, I just brushed my teeth,
此时不吻 更待何时 so this would be the optimal time to kiss.
过程愉悦 樱唇柔嫩 Enjoyable. Soft lips.
湿润合度 Just the right level of moisture.
-何不再次相吻 -不要 - Would you like to do it again? - No.
现在到了收听广播新闻的时间 We should listen to the news on this radio.
我带收音机就是不想错过紧急新闻 I brought it as a cautionary measure,
这间小木屋的不远处 because this cabin is within walking distance
可是本地的疯人院 of the local insane asylum.
难怪你能便宜租到 Oh, is that why you were able to rent it
-这么豪华的小木屋 -没错 -at such a reasonable rate? - Yes.
我希望今晚的你跟我一样春意盎然 I hope you're as fertile as I am tonight.
有过之而无不及 More.
阿布蒂 Abed!
干嘛还要模拟唱这整首歌 Why are you doing the whole song?
他们哪可能一打开广播 They wouldn't turn the radio on at the exact moment
就听到要听的新闻啊 of the most pertinent news broadcast.
过度巧合显得太假 It's too coincidental.
我快进吧 But I'll jump forward in time.
那是什么声音 What was that noise?
从我们刚听到的新闻报道来看 Based on the news report we just heard,
就是音乐唱完的那段 but not just just heard,
应该是趁疯人院落后的安保系统失灵 I assume it's the deranged, hook-handed killer,
跑出来的精神错乱钩子手杀人魔弄的声音 who escaped when the asylum's antiquated security system failed.
谁让精神病院贪小便宜 I guess they shouldn't have cut corners,
不过鉴于经济衰退 although it is understandable,
他们也算情有可原吧 given the recent economic downturn.
是不是该去查看一下啊 Should we go check it out?
不必 我们只需 No. We should call 911
用我电力满满的手机打给警察伯伯 on my fully-charged cell phone,
锁上门 拿起刀 背靠背 lock the doors, and then stand back to back
站在房间正中央 就万事大吉啦 in the middle of the room holding knives.
-我爱你 -噤声 - I love you-- - shh.
那两个人到底死不死啊 Did these people ever die or what?
不是不死 而是时候... Eventually, once it had been...
未到 到 到 eaaarned.
布雷塔 Well, britta...
看来有人看走眼 操错心了啊 It looks like you're barking up the wrong tree.
就是 你们想听恐怖故事是吧 Yeah. You want to hear a scary story?
给你们讲美国恐怖故事 I've got a scary story.
谢谢你把我从马车里救出来 Thank you for pulling me from that carriage.
真不知道我的马儿是被什么吓成这样 I don't know what could have frightened my horses so.
许多邪恶生物都这森林里窝藏 Many vile creatures make these woods their home.
据说此地还有... 怪物出没 Some even warn of... monsters.
我不相信有怪物的存在 I don't believe in monsters.
我相信人性本善 所以天下无怪兽 I believe every man has good within.
明天我得把书从马车残骸中找回来 I must retrieve my books from the debris tomorrow.
我是个老师 I am a school teacher,
很多孩子都指望着我上课呢 and many children rely on me to educate them.
走吧 无辜妹子 Be gone, innocent one!
怎么了 What's wrong?
你可以选择不相信它们的存在 You may choose not to believe in them,
可我真的是怪物 but I a monster.
不吃人不行 and I must feed.
别嫌弃我虚弱不堪的样子 Do not judge me for my weakness.
省口气吧 Stifle your slackened maw,
你个血尽人枯的贱妇 you drained and tainted bitch dog.
吸吸就习惯了 I'm fine with this.
慢着 Wait!
教我读书识字吧 Teach me to read.
词 Wo...
念出来 Sound it out.
词 狗 Wo...rd dog
厌 猫 hates... cats.
"别和我说需要不需要" "Oh reason not the need!
[出自莎士比亚的《李尔王》 第二幕第四场]
"最卑贱的乞丐 也有他不值钱的身外之物" Our basest beggars are in the poorest things superfluous."
对对 太棒了 Yes! Yes! Yes!
我成功帮你洗心革面 你真该觉得自豪 You should be proud of how much I've changed you.
谢谢你帮我 Thank you for helping me,
但恐怕有些怪物 but I'm afraid some monsters
死性难改 cannot change.
不要 No...
抑制你的渴望 Resist your craving!
拿起一本好书 Just pick up a good book
静下心看吧 and read!
你的鹅颈白嫩 光洁如瓷 Your porcelain neck,
映着如水月华 in the light of the full moon,
让我食"齿"大动 too appetizing.
很遗憾 Unfortunate...
你才是待宰的羔羊 for you.
正如你说 有些怪物死性难改 You see, some monsters cannot change.
有些则能随机应"变" But others can.
这是闹哪样 What is this?
我是一个专吃自私吸血鬼的狼人 I'm a werewolf that feeds on selfish vampires.
他的躯体被五马分尸 大卸八块 And she ripped into his torso,
比沙鼠啃碎的桂格燕麦盒子还破碎 like a gerbil shredding a Quaker oats box,
内脏碎块漫天飞舞 sending chunks of viscera
血雾狂喷 溅了那无耻二奶一脸 and an aerosol mist of blood all over the skanky concubine.
她还用了他的肌腱剔牙 Then, she flossed her teeth with his tendons.
由于吸血鬼的生命力强韧 And, because he was a vampire,
他意识清醒得被生吞活剥 He lived through all of it.
直到她吞下自己最后一个眼球 He had to watch her swallow his last eyeball.
而且她还让眼珠子连着视神经 She kept it attached to the optic nerve,
好让他能随着被吞入食道 so he could see down her throat,
看到自己那尚未被消化完毕的血肉 to his own partially digested flesh
在她胃部翻滚的景象 in...her...stomach.
瞧 峰回路转 出人意料 See? There was a twist.
我说安妮呀 Wow, Annie
想不到你居然是《吸血鬼戈尔》的粉丝 I didn't know you were such a fan of...Gore.
今天可是万圣节 It's Halloween.
恐怖故事 代入感和真实感缺一不可 If you're gonna tell a scary story, give it some texture.
你的故事也就普通 Wasn't that great.
你的故事有点太过冷血残酷虐杀了吧 Well, your texture was so discompassionately macabre,
没有点人间温情 as if without the slightest regard for human life.
够了 别瞎夸她了 That's enough. Stop pinning ribbons to her.
为啥安妮就可以各项全能 Why does Annie get to be good at everything?
听我说个真实不鬼扯的恐怖故事吧 You guys wanna hear a real, legit scary story?
你好 Hello?
有人在吗 Is there anyone here?
谁来帮帮我 I need help.
谢天谢地 有个老医生 Oh, thank God. An old doctor.
我和我的搭档是战斗机飞行员 Me and my partner are top gun fighter pilots,
横扫飞行界 无人能敌 The best of the best.
哒 哒 哒 Pew pew pew.
我们的F15战机坠入树林了 Our f-15 went down in the woods.
难怪刚听见外头一声美妙的巨响呢 I thought I heard something awesome out there.
请进吧 帮你们急救或干嘛的 Please, come in, for first aids and what have you.
陌生人给的饮料 Mmm, drinks from a stranger.
太治愈了 谢谢 So medical. Thank you.
醒醒 醒醒 Wakey-wakey.
这是怎么回事 What's going on?
这个隔间是我的工作室 This cabin is my lab,
我在这里做各种诡异的人体实验 Where I do weird experiments on people.
看 Look!
不 Noo!
被迫连体一辈子 Forced to be together forever!
是我把你们缝在一起了 I sewed you together.
从上到下都缝在一起了 I totally sewed you together!
阿布蒂 Abed!
既然被缝在一起了 Now that we're sewn together,
你说咱能意念移物吗 do we have E.S.P.?
有 现在我们通灵了 Yes! We're psychic now.
我们可以用意念力打败他 We can destroy him with mind powers.
你试图打败我们... You tried to destroy us...
但你却让我们... But you only made us...
更加强大 More awesome!
不可以 我会妒忌的 No! I'm a j-jealous
现在你是实验品了 Now you are the subject.
什么 什么 说清楚点 What? What? Tell me more.
我们把你的屁股 We sewed your butt
丰到胸上去了 哈哈 To your chest! Ha!
不 Noo!
等等 Wait.
哈哈 你们这些蠢材 Ha! You fools!
把屁股缝到我胸前 By sewing my butt to my chest,
我不就能随时自摸了吗 you've given me boobs I can touch all day.
拿什么摸 With what?
不 Noo!
不 No!
不 Noo!
不 Nooo!
脚成了手 Feet hands.
为什么要那样对我 What did I do to deserve that?
故事无聊 就别伤及无辜 Keep me out of your stupid stories.
我可没说那是你 I didn't say it was you.
我说的是一个种族歧视的疯子老教授 I said he was a crazy, old, racist doctor.
没错 朋友里就我三条全符合 Yeah, and I'm your crazy, old, racist friend.
从前是 现在可能改过自新了 I was, anyway. Now I'm not so sure.
这只是个故事 皮尔斯 It's just a story, Pierce.
是吗 接下来这个也只是个故事 Yeah? Well so is this.
接着来呀 酒鬼 Come back to bed, magnum.
马上 美女们 In a moment, girls.
我正浅酌事后酒 高档白兰地 I'm just enjoying an expensive, post-coital brandy.
看来找到好东西了 Whats we gots heres?
入室抢劫 你这假娘们 This is a home invasion, you jive mother.
冷静 冷静 冷静 Easy, easy, easy.
没必要伤人 Nobody has to get hurt here.
是的 没必要 白鬼子 Yeah, that's right, honky.
你好好冷静一下 You take it real easy
高档白兰地和毂盖统统交出来 and give us all your expensive brandy and hubcaps.
好的 但是... okay, but...
可怜的 Oh, man.
给...你... You...Are...
最后...一下 Still...Relevant!
我的天哪 Oh, my god! Unh!
好了 我准备好玩打屁屁了 Okay, I'm ready for my birthday spanking.
哪个美女能从现在开始数到30 Which of you girls knows how to count to 30?
这鬼东西...到底... What...In the hell...
是什么 Was that?
那连个鬼故事也算不上 That wasn't even a ghost story.
有点像十八禁 It was like an episode of some show
少儿不宜剧集节选 we're all too young to have heard of.
别想歪了 我只是把你们碎尸而已 Fine! Then I chopped up both your bodies.
我们是被剁了 那你还是酒鬼吗 So that was us, and you were magnum?
还是 巴基斯坦人 想试试吗 Still am, Pakistan. Wanna try me?
伙计们 我认为故事有人身攻击了 Guys, I think these stories are starting to get personal.
过于暴力 And so needlessly violent.
过去那些正义战胜邪恶的 What happened to the days when ghost stories
传统鬼故事多好啊 were about good versus evil?
从前 Once upon a time...
伙计 我这儿药磕完了 Aw, man. My drugs are wearing off.
谁还有吗 Who's got more?
给你 亲爱的 Here you go, baby.
太好了 太好了 All right, all right.
女体盛什么的最带劲了 That is my kind of pot bong.
来 混球 来看看 Yo, Jango, check it out.
蝗虫之灾 Swarms of locusts
还有青蛙之灾 and tornadoes of frogs.
纽约客表示无压力 I don't care. I lived in New York.
哦 外面可真像纽约 Ugh! It's like New York out there.
抱歉打扰重金属狂欢夜 We interrupt your death metal
有重要消息播报 to bring you some heavy news.
善良的信徒都上了天堂 All the good christians got raptured up to heaven,
如果你能听到 So if you're hearing this,
好消息是 你们帅呆酷毙 举世无双 The good news is you're the coolest people in the world.
好耶 Yes!
坏消息是 没"世"让你们活了 The bad news is the world is over.
夜间新闻报道 This is NPR.
惨了 世界末日吗 Aw, man. End of days?
惨不忍睹 Could anything suck harder than this?
你...们好 Hel-lo!
魔鬼给你们请安 Devil here.
顺路带来地狱游小贴士 Just popping by with a little damnation orientation.
现在是无线电播送 Here's the sched.
蝎噬之刑 请按00 00, you'll be buried neck-deep in scorpions.
熔岩灌肠请按15 接下来是普拉提 15, lava enemas, followed by pilates.
-还不错 -我喜欢普拉提[健身操] - Oh. That's good. - I like pilates.
我所谓的普拉提是恶魔噬蛋之刑 Pilates is a demon that eats your genitals.
这些稍后 But first,
吓怕怕吧 stabby-stabby.
你哭给谁看 For whom do ye cry out?
好人都修仙走人了 All the good people are gone!
那不是我们欺凌的信徒朋友嘛 It's our friend we used to pick on for being christian.
哇 好纯好美 Oh, she looks great.
正义的风在吹 A righteous wind blows!
吹到普拉提了 Off to pilates!
谢谢你救了我们 雪瑞 Thank you for saving us, Shirley.
我知道 你名字不叫雪瑞 I mean, your name's not Shirley,
原创故事 不宜对号入座 This is a story about strangers.
不管怎样 能带我们去天堂吗 Anyhoo, can you take us
求你了 to heaven now, please?
哦 我不能 Ooh, I cannot.
我只是顺路道别 前往极乐世界 I just came to say good-bye on my way to Abraham's bosom.
再见 Bye.
我宽恕你们 I forgive you.
打倒基婚 Gay marriage!
然后他把他们锯成了碎屑 And he chainsawed them to bits!
又把他们给装回去 Then he put 'em back together.
再把他们锯成碎屑 And then he chainsawed them again!
循环往复 永无休止 Forever.
杰夫打过酱油就没影了吗 Where was Jeff in that story?
凭什么我要叫混球 And why was my name Jango?
雪瑞 那不是个好故事 Shirley,that wasn't a hard story,
那是在说教 that was a sermon.
你毁了一个"谱雷塌"的聚会 You ruined a Britta party.
雪上加霜 越抹越脏 That's like letting poop spoil.
不 别走啊 No! Wait!
先别走 No!
事情搞清楚之前谁也不许走 No one can leave until we figure this out.
搞清楚什么 Figure what out?
长话短说 Long story short,
上周我让你们做的心理测试出结果了 those psych tests I made you take came back.
结果表明我们中有位变态杀人狂 Turns out one of you is probably a homicidal maniac.
太离奇了吧 That's stupid.
我肩负使命 I have a responsibility,
作为一个心理学的先行者 as a practitioner of the mental arts,
有义务找出潜伏在我们之中的变态 to figure out which one of you is sick,
然后给他对症下药 and get you the treatment you need.
他现在的状态于人于己都很危险 You're a danger to yourself and others in your current state.
我们都相处两年了 We've known each other for two years.
没看出谁是杀人犯啊 None of us are murderers.
但有位同志杀人思想冒头了 No, but one of you has the potential.
如果我们现在就离开 If we leave here now,
你知道会发生什么吗 do you know what might happen?
布雷塔 你在瞎扯些什么 Britta, what are you describing?
什么 What?
谁的思想会这么黑暗啊 Who has images like that in their head?
或许借鬼故事之名暗地分析我们思想的那位 Probably the same kind of person that would make us
思想龌龊就至于此 tell ghost stories in order to secretly study our minds.
我只是担心你们当中有人 I'm just worried that one of you--
为什么只是我们 你也参加了测试啊 One of us? You took that test too, right?
什么 你说什么 What? What are you saying?
哦 天啊 Oh, my god!
如果真是我该怎么啊 What if it is me?
等等 这一切太疯狂了 Wait. This is crazy!
咱们自己吓自己 无非是因为万圣节 We're getting freaked out because it's Halloween,
我们都冷静冷静 we just need to settle down.
我要杀了你 I'll kill you!
试试硫酸钡的滋味吧 You don't want to be barium sulfated!
-停 -别靠近我 神经病们 - Whoa! - Stay back, psychos!
不然我就浴血撕喉 Or I'll slit your throats and bathe in your blood.
你们这是怎么了 Whoa! What has happened to all of you?
你也听布雷塔讲了 You heard all the stories.
这里的人都可能是神经病 Anyone here could be a...Psycho!
杞人忧天才是神经病 Thinking that is what psycho.
给你们讲个温情故事治愈一下吧 Here, I have a story that I think might help.
在你行凶之前 Before you do anything,
告诉我们你为什么要杀人 tell us why you kill people.
恐惧 Fear.
我杀人是因为我害怕 I kill because I'm afraid.
爱我你就抱抱我 Somebody, please, give me a hug.
快进来 Get in here.
来抱抱 爱的拥抱 Love hugs. Love hugs.
哭出来吧 一切会好起来的 Let it out. It's okay?
不客气啊 You're welcome.
这故事基情四射 That was the gayest crap
无下限了 I've ever heard in my life.
是啊 杰夫 你什么意思啊 Yeah, Jeff. What the hell?
你为什么一心执念于麻痹我们 Why are you always so determined to have us relax
让我们放松防备 and put down our weapons?
或许 他就是那个没人性的疯子 Maybe he's a remorseless madman with no empathy,
想要通过说服大家 来逃避排查 who eludes detection by manipulating others.
有可能 杰夫 Yeah, Jeff.
我们或许该挨个检查下你的测试结果 Maybe we should go through your test answers one by one.
随便查 反正我是瞎填的 It doesn't matter. I filled mine out randomly.
-别装了 -什么 - Oh, come on. - What?
你太2B了 You idiot!
有问题的可能就是你瞎填那张 That was probably the test that returned the psychotic result!
有可能哈 Hmm. Maybe.
哪门子反社会的不招供啊 Well, what kind of sociopath doesn't offer that information,
一小时之前你干嘛来着 like, an hour ago?
不不不 我不是反社会者 No, no. I'm no sociopath.
是非善恶我自己分得清楚 I always know what I'm doing is wrong.
我就这样 不爱测试不工作 I'm just a guy that doesn't like taking tests, doing work,
不听说教不受责 or getting yelled at.
考虑到这点的话 So if you think about it,
我才是这里最理智的人 that makes me the sanest person here.
屁 Boo!
这是你的试卷吗 Is this your test or what?
我上哪儿知道去 只有涂卡又没题目 How should I know? It's just a bunch of bubbles.
等一等 Wait!
给我看看 Give me those.
为什么分数打在单子的底部 Why are the scores on the bottoms of the sheets?
他们应该 They should--
布雷塔 看看这大箭头 Britta, look at the arrow.
入读卡器时试卷放反了 You ran these through the machine upside-down.
她又犯二了 She britta'd it.
好吧 我重新去做一下 Whatever. I'll run them through again.
你们大家 别再用我的名字 And you guys are gonna stop using my name
暗喻"犯错犹可恕"了 to mean "Making a tiny and understandable mistake."
一小时以后
我们都是疯子啊 So we're all insane.
除了这哥们儿 Well, except for this person.
那是我的吗 Is that one mine?
要不要查个究竟 We should probably figure it out, right?
我们中只有一个人是正常的 If one of us isn't crazy, it's only fair
说明其余的人都是疯子 that the rest of us know who they are.
换个角度 积极点想 Or we could hold on to the comforting notion
举世皆疯 清醒何用 t-that any one of us m-might be sane.
好吧 就这么想吧 Yeah. Okay.
我们今晚都上了很重要的一课 We learned an important lesson tonight.
我们再也不能做事"谱雷塌" We should never make the Britta
或者"不理他"了 of Britta-ing each other's feelings.
这词不这么用的 You're using it wrong.
你实在"不会答"到"谱雷塌"啊 Wow. You Britta'd "Britta'd."
-我们去"爱蹦迪"吧 -我没明白 - Yeah, way to pull an Abed. - I don't get it.
雪瑞 你别"皮二死"了 Shirley, don't Pierce.
我还是没懂 I don't get it.
万圣节快乐
祝福请笑纳
安妮 杰夫 布雷塔 特洛伊 雪瑞 皮尔斯
以及 正常人阿布蒂
伙计们都三天了 Guys, it's been three days!
你们打算什么时候放了我啊 When are you gonna let me go?
至少说句话吧 At least say something!
伙计们 Guys?
伙计们 Guys!
我们应该放了他吗 Should we let him go?
让我想想 Hmm...Let me think.
不 再来点儿白兰地吗 Nah. More brandy?
我直接喝你不介意吧 Don't mind if I do.
这太糟糕了 Mmm...That's terrible.
F15已经意念修复了 Should we get back in our F-15 that we repaired
我们是不是该回去了 with our mind power?
我也是这么想的 I was thinking the same thing!
我知道 I know!
你拍一我拍一 你拍二我拍二 Jinx! Double jinx!
你拍三我拍三 Triple jinx!
特洛伊和阿布蒂合体 Troy and abed sewn together.