皮尔斯 你让大家开车来到 Pierce, you made us all drive to
这荒山野岭的仓库 a warehouse in the middle of nowhere.
至少得告诉我们原因吧 You could at least tell us why.
我也一头雾水好吧 Hey, I know as much as you.
我父亲的遗嘱执行人 I got a letter from
发了封信给我 the executor of my father's estate.
说让我带七位最好的朋友来这里 It said to come out here with my seven closest friends.
你只带了六个 You brought six.
他还能带谁来啊 Well, who else was he gonna bring?
莱瓦·伯顿说不定能来[《星际迷航》主演] Levar Burton was a maybe.
霍桑先生 Mr. Hawthorne.
-不好意思 -吉尔伯特 - I apologize. - Gilbert.
就算死了 我爸还让你 Even from the grave, my father's got you
为他跑腿擦屁股 by the short and curly salt and pepperies.
我叫吉尔伯特·罗森 My name is Gilbert Lawson.
30多年来一直是科尼里奥斯·霍桑的助理 I was Cornelius Hawthorne's assistant for over 30 years,
在这之前 我只是在他泡澡时 and before that, I was just the teenager
为他读《圣经》的少年 who read the bible to him in the bath.
好了 好了 All right, all right.
该继承遗产了 It's inheritance time.
支票拿来吧 哥们儿 How 'bout that check, soul brother?
你父亲确实给你留了点东西 Your father did leave you something,
更确切说是一次活动 but it's more of an activity.
多谢你搞得无比诡异 Thank you for keeping it as creepy as possible.
这看起来像是多人游戏的界面 This looks like a multi-player gaming interface.
听到这句就行 I've heard enough.
那个坏心肠的老顽固 Oh, that diabolical old fossil face.
1979年时 我问他要钱开发电子游戏 I asked him for money to invest in video games back in 1979.
科尼里奥斯花了30多年的时间 Cornelius spent over 30 years
为你开发了一款游戏 developing a video game for you.
他的遗愿就是 It was his dying wish
你和你七位最好的朋友一起玩 that you and seven of your closest friends would play it.
莱瓦·伯顿说不定能来 Lavar Burton was a maybe.
所以 请选个位子吧 So, please, choose a seat.
酷 Cool.
这么说百岁老怪设计了一款 So a 100-year-old man designed
30年历史的老游戏 a 30-year-old video game?
我得瞧瞧 This I've got to see.
当你们坐到电脑后 Once you're seated behind your computers,
会被拍照 a photograph of you will be taken
游戏人物会根据你的模样生成 and an avatar will be made from your likeness.
我没带画像来[likeness有画像之义] I didn't bring my likeness.
别笑 Don't smile.
好的 各位 游戏开始 All right, everyone, let's begin.
霍家堡冒险记 模拟加载中
本字幕由 YYeTs人人影视 原创翻译制作 仅供学习 禁止用于任何商业盈利行为 更多影视更新 请登陆 www.YYeTs.com
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翻译 独醉
时间轴 鱼骨头
校对 三集联播橙酱油
后期 鱼骨头
总监 夕橙
《废柴联盟》 第三季第二十集 霍家堡冒险记
点击游戏开始
-爽 -酷 - Nice! - Cool.
-咱们的学校 -酷酷酷 - Old school. - Cool, cool, cool.
哪个是我 Which one is me?
我不搞种族歧视 我不猜 I assume nothing because I'm not racist.
我们好萌哦 We're adorable!
既然是完全随机 Why did this thing take photos
虚构出的身材 为什么要给我们拍照 if it was going to completely fabricate random body shapes?
我也这么想 不过我发型不错 That's what I'm saying! My hair looks good, though.
橙色按钮是跳 Orange button is jump.
我是哪个 Which guy am I?
这里有门 There's a door here.
-和平 爱 -这是什么啊 - Peace. Love. - What's that?
-我想是嬉皮士 -和平 爱 - I think it's a hippie. - Peace. Love.
安妮 别动不动就哦哦地叫 Annie, stop "awing" everything.
别烦嘛 人家说了和平 Don't be jaded. He's saying "peace."
-你好 -性爱 - Hello. - Sex.
-他刚说性爱吗 -毒品 性爱 - Did he say "sex"? - Drugs. Sex.
我的天啊 Oh, my god.
坚持下 我来了 Hold on, I'm coming.
见鬼 该死 Darn! Shoot!
-我靠 -杰夫 你刚把安妮给杀了 - Dang it. Um- - Jeff, you just murdered Annie.
总比看着她被人施暴好吧 Well, better than doing nothing!
-我觉得说不通 -有点道理 - I'm not sure that's the case. - That's debatable.
伙计们 救我 You guys, help me.
-像你救安妮那样救吗 -性爱 - The way you helped annie? - Sex.
我们参战前 应该旁观研究下他们的战术 Before we engage, we should hang back and study their tactics.
-什么 -群交 - What? - Group sex.
我的妈呀 Oh, my god!
太好了 我又活了 Oh, cool, I'm alive.
-皮尔斯 -这游戏没法玩 - Pierce? - This game makes no sense.
你怎么也死了 What happened to you?
我不想谈这个问题 I don't want to talk about it.
皮尔斯 操纵杆向右 Pierce, point the joystick right.
难不成还得让我自己猜吗 So I'm supposed to just guess that?
游戏说明在哪里 Where are the instructions?
受死吧 我们太厉害了 Take that! Take that! Yeah, we rule!
你们又活了 Oh, you guys are alive.
死后可以在自习室里活过来 You re-spawn in the study room when you die.
我让你去瞧瞧 Here, I'll show you.
杰夫瑞 你这样太丢人了 Jeffrey! Shame on you!
旁观研究下他们的战术 "Hang back and study their tactics"?
让他发泄下吧 Let him get it out of his system.
算了 继续前进吧 Ah, forget it. Let's just keep moving.
现在怎样 Now what?
欢迎来到霍家堡 Welcome to Hawkthorne.
这是我爸的声音 爸 That's dad's voice. Dad?
皮尔斯南德 1980年 Piercinald, in 1980,
你说未来超赚钱的生意 不是湿纸巾 you said that video games, not moist towelettes,
而是电子游戏 were the business of the future.
现在 湿纸巾在各大超市随处可见 Today, moist towelettes are stocked in every supermarket,
但游戏机室却是一家接一家的关门 while arcade after arcade closes.
他说的有道理 He's got a point.
但是 我还是设计了这款游戏让你 Nevertheless, I designed this game to be played upon my death
在我死后和你那撮所谓朋友的 by you and whatever cabal of fruits,
同性恋 瘾君子和荡妇一起玩 junkies, and sluts you call your friends.
人家叫布雷塔 Her name is britta.
只有一位玩家可以胜出 Only one player can win-
第一个到达霍家堡王座的人为胜者 The first to reach my throne inside castle Hawkthorne.
皮尔斯 奖品是你的继承权 Their reward, Pierce, will be your inheritance.
-什么 -他的继承权 搞什么 - What? - His inheritance? What?
你看 皮尔斯 原来你是对的 So you see, Pierce, turns out you were right.
电子游戏很重要 Video games are important.
史上最不争气的儿子 Worst son ever!
这下可好 我怎么可能赢过你们 Well, great. How do I fight you guys?
哪个按钮是打人 Which button fights?
-皮尔斯 别这样 -皮尔斯 放轻松 - Pierce, stop. - Pierce, relax.
皮尔斯 别泄气 别泄气 Pierce, stay in the game, stay in the game.
皮尔斯 冷静 Pierce, calm down.
-没人会与你为敌 -为什么 - Nobody's gonna fight you. - Why not?
因为我们已经和你做了三年的朋友 Because when you're friends with someone for three years,
偷朋友家里的钱是很奇怪的事 it's weird to steal their family's money.
而且打赢你太没游戏精神了 And there wouldn't be a lot of sport in beating you.
-瞧你这模样 -他说的对 - Look at yourself. - Yeah, he's right.
游戏不是这样玩的 You're playing the game wrong.
亨利·贝拉方提怎么在这[音乐人 已逝] Why is Harry Belafonte in here?
我是吉尔伯特 It's Gilbert.
你们不应该合作 You're not supposed to cooperate,
应该互相竞争 you're supposed to compete.
多谢提醒 Thanks for the advice,
但我想我们可以选择玩的方式 but I think we can choose how we want to play.
-我想可以吧 -他这是吓唬人吗 - I suppose we can. - Is he being ominous?
你为什么要吓唬我们 Why are you being ominous?
可以捡道具吗 Whoa. We can pick stuff up?
这款游戏比你们想象的要复杂得多 This game is more complex than you can imagine.
物品栏 材料
而且程序设计员 And aside from its programmers,
都已经被遣返回中国了 who have all been deported back to china,
飞刀制造成功
只有我知道这游戏该怎么玩 I'm the one who knows how it works.
可以投掷
快跑 快跑 他要扔飞刀了 Run, run! He's gonna throw a knife!
他要扔飞刀了 快 He's gonna throw a knife! Go!
跳 跳 Jump! Jump!
等等 你要做什么 Wait! What are you-?
他是个疯子 他... He's a psychopath! He's suffo-
听着 伙计 我知道给肯德基老爷子 Hey, look, buddy, I know it must have sucked
做牛做马不是滋味 being Colonel Sanders' manservant and all,
但皮尔斯好歹算我们的朋友 but Pierce is technically our friend,
你想坑他的钱 我们不会坐视不理的 and we're not gonna watch you screw him over.
也许你应该问问自己 Perhaps you should be asking yourselves
你将如何阻止我 how you intend to stop me.
我们过来整死你怎么样 How about if we come over there and kick your ass?
整死他 特洛伊 Go get him, Troy.
随便啦 Be my guest.
但离开座位30秒后 But 30 seconds after you leave your chairs,
体重感应器将视为自动弃权 the weight sensors will recognize it as an automatic forfeit.
体重感应器 Weight sensors?
忍无可忍了 咱们去收拾那个混蛋 That's it. Let's get that jag!
-上啊 -收拾他 - Yeah! - Get him!
嬉皮士受死吧 Kick that hippie's ass!
我们走 快快快 Let's go! Move, move, move!
-我想他留了张字条 -什么 - I think he left a note. - What?
"在你们挥霍完自己的积蓄后 "After you've squandered the last of your savings,
我会在霍家大楼顶层办公室通过望远镜 I'll watch you writhe, penniless, in the gutter,
欣赏你流落街头一文不名的惨状" through a telescope in the penthouse office of Hawthorne Tower."
居然可以留纸条 这游戏太赞了 You can leave notes. This game is incredible.
皮尔斯 Pierce?
-别这样 皮尔斯 -别这样 - No, Pierce! - Please, no!
我们需要你 We need you!
让我死吧 Just let me die.
皮尔斯 吉尔伯特是知道一堆诀窍 Pierce, so Gilbert knows a couple tricks.
有什么了不起的 咱们人多不怕 Big deal. We outnumber him.
而且更重要的是 他为贪婪而战 And most importantly, while he's fighting for greed,
我们为友谊而战 we're fighting for friendship,
我们不会输的 好吗 which means we can't lose, okay?
-好的 -好的 - Okay. - Okay!
我想没设计拥抱按钮 I guess there's no hug button.
大家保护好皮尔斯 Everybody keep Pierce protected.
我们得赶在吉尔伯特前 We have to get him to the throne
把他送到霍家堡的王座 of Hawkthorne before Gilbert.
别忘了 一旦死掉 And don't forget, when you die,
就得从自习室从头再来 you go all the way back to the study room.
所以 别死 So... Don't die.
"真会"加油打气 杰夫 Good pep talk, Jeff.
是啊 我以前喜欢送死 Yeah, I used to love dying,
这番话让我回心转意了 but that speech really turned me around.
爱听不听 Whatever.
这是什么 干掉 What's that? Kill it!
是个女生在挤牛奶 皮尔斯 It's a girl milking a cow, Pierce.
我去看看 我刚才害过杰夫一次 I'll check it out. I owe Jeff that.
算你自觉 I wasn't gonna say it.
我叫希尔达 我住在村子里 I am Hilda. I live in the village.
同性恋 Lesbian.
选择: 讲话 选择: 小姐 我有问题
我可以帮忙 I can help with that.
我拥有很多主题的资料 I have information on many topics.
酷 Cool.
选择: 霍家堡王座
王座在霍家堡里 由此向北 The throne is in Castle Hawkthorne, north of here.
打开城堡大门 需要惩戒白水晶 You unlock the castle with the white crystal of discipline,
要到黑暗洞穴中将白水晶解救出来 which you must free from the black caverns.
这话里有话啊 I'm picking up on some hidden symbolism.
没错 白水晶 Right, "white crystal."
你们觉得我爸是说迷幻药吗 You think dad was into meth?
在这样的小镇上应该可以补充装备 You can usually get supplies in a town like this.
老天 为什么我妈不在这儿 Man, why can't my mom be here?
她总是说我的游戏知识迟早会派上用场 She always said my video game knowledge would come in handy.
我居然不相信她 I never believed her.
大家分头行动 各去一个小屋 Everybody split up and take a hut.
击败吉尔伯特的唯一机会就是攻占更多地盘 Our only chance of beating Gilbert is to cover more ground.
选择: 更多
我拥有以下主题资料 I have information on the following topics.
我擦 Holy crap.
为什么你现在才出现在我生命里 Where have you been my whole life?
我买卖武器及盔甲 I buy and sell weapons and armor.
铁匠 武器 盔甲 药剂
酷 我们需要武器 Cool. We need weapons.
这么贵 有不要钱的吗 Ooh. Well, what's free?
火炬可以给我们吗 Can we have a torch?
-贼 贼 -安妮 放回去 - Thief! Thief! - Annie, put it back.
对不起 对不起 Sorry. Sorry.
对不起 对不起 对不起 Sorry, sorry, sorry.
上帝啊 Oh, my god.
-你干什么呀 -是意外 - What are you doing? - It was an accident!
他快死了 He's dying!
坚持 坚持 All right, hold on, hold on!
你这又是干什么呀 Now what are you doing?
他太痛苦了 He was suffering!
是啊 被斧子劈的 Yeah, from axe wounds!
如果这个不算得分 那什么才算 Well, if this isn't worth any points, what is?
你问我作甚 You're asking me?
我还想找"乒乓对战"玩呢[古董电玩] I'm still looking for a pong paddle.
-我们打牌吧 -这才像话嘛 - Let's play poker. - Oh, now we're talking.
你翻桌子 我抄衣柜 Check the desk. I'll check the dresser.
怎样才能把画摆正 How do I straighten that painting?
没办法 别像个小女生似的 You can't. Stop playing like a girl.
摆正画作: 是 否
别像个小女生似的 Stop playing like a girl?
这就是女人的优点 杰夫 Here's the thing about women, Jeff.
我们不会用暴力解决问题 We don't hack and slash our way through life
一切尽在温柔掌握中 because we're one with life.
-帮我把尸体藏起来 -上帝啊上帝 - Help me hide the body. - Oh, my lord. Oh, my lord.
雪瑞 这种事在游戏里很正常 Shirley, these things happen in video games.
-是吗 -是的 - They do? - Yes.
现实世界的道德感在这里不管用 We can't get hung up on real world morality.
我们得活下去赢得胜利 We need to survive and win.
你们好 我是铁匠的妻子 Hello, I'm the blacksmith's wife-
啊 救命啊 Aah! Help!
-见鬼 -守好大门 - Oh, crap! - Guard the door.
什么 What?
雪瑞 Shirley!
不能留活口 No witnesses!
能拿多少拿多少 Grab everything you can carry.
我去楼上看看还有没有人 I'll check upstairs for any more family.
别这样看我 都怪你没用 Don't give me that look. These are your loose ends.
我只是收拾残局而已 I'm just tying 'em up.
这也太酷了 This is so cool.
你们的衣服呢 Where are your clothes?
皮尔斯教我打牌 Pierce taught me poker.
我没什么天赋 I'm not good at it.
你还在和这女生聊吗 You still talking to this girl?
是的 根据激活的基本模式 Yeah, she only has three moves
她只有三种动作 that you activate with basic patterns of stimulus.
我以前从未有这种感觉 I've never felt this way before.
-阿布蒂 别走火入魔了 -不会的 - Abed, don't get weird. - Oh, I won't.
她还没准备谈正式的恋爱 She's not ready for anything serious,
但她要我见见她家里人 but she wants me to meet her family.
-我爸是铁匠 -她爸是铁匠 - My father is the blacksmith. - Her father's a blacksmith.
-大家好 -大家买东西去了吗 - Hello! - Everybody go shopping?
我们就是买东西去了 That's all we did.
这屋子着火了吗 Is that hut on fire?
天啊 多么不可思议的悲剧 Oh, my. What an unexplained tragedy.
我们和这锅子搭调吗 Don't we look comfy at a cauldron.
快看 Check it out.
酿造: 是 否
瞧 我要把这些都放进去 Ooh, see, I'll put all of this in here,
还有这个 然后点这个 and then that, and then I'll hit this.
什么东西 What is it?
我想 应该是强力剂吧 I assume, like, a strength potion.
那我想应该是毒药吧 Then I assume it's poison.
你只是嫉妒而已 因为在这个世界里 You're just jealous because we found a world
我混得比你好 where I know what I'm doing.
这地方和你公寓相比 不过少20团猫粪 This place is 20 cat turds and a pixies poster
和一张烂俗海报而已 from being your apartment.
这一身主妇打扮的女生怎么了 What's with the st. Pauli girl?
希尔达的父母住在这屋子里 Hilda's parents lived there.
现在她没有家人了 Now she has no family.
她将被迫嫁给一位男性村民 She'll be forced to marry a male villager
或是去荒野生存 or take her chances in the wilderness.
这到底是哪门子的游戏啊 What kind of game is this?
-见鬼 吉尔伯特来了 -哎哟喂 - Oh, crap, it's Gilbert. - Well, well, well.
看来有人落后一步了 Looks like someone's one step behind.
就是 如果你想找武器 没门儿 Yeah, if you're looking for equipment, tough luck.
在一场可怕的意外中武器店没有了 The store was lost in a freak accident.
我根本不需要武器 年轻的女士 I hardly need equipment, young lady.
你购物的时候 我已升级到有这种能力了 While you were shopping, I gained enough levels to do this.
他耍六脉神剑呢 老子居然没穿衣服 He's shooting lightning and I'm naked!
到我们后面来 我们有盔甲 Get behind us! We have armor!
大爷的 吉尔伯特 Oh, great! Gilbert!
我擦 邪恶绝地武士版吉尔伯特 Oh, great! Evil Jedi Lightning Gilbert!
布雷塔 快喝你做的超级强力剂 Britta, drink that super strength potion you made.
对哦 对哦 Oh, right, right, right, right.
快 布雷塔 Hurry up, britta!
我也想快 我也想快 I'm trying, I'm trying! Aah!
我靠 原以为可以指望布雷塔 Damn it, I thought we could count on Britta
喝东西她最拿手 to not screw up drinking.
这下有意思了 This'll be fun.
搞什么 What the hell?
希望我们可以指望她 Here's hoping we can count on her
补药做成毒药 to screw up making potions.
难以置信 Unbelievable.
杰夫把大家的命都押在布雷塔身上 赢了 Jeff bet all our lives on Britta and won,
我的裤子却输给了一对九 and I lost my pants to a pair of nines.
好吧 Very well.
咱们来好好玩玩吧 Let's play.
各种牛逼功能 执行: 是
阿布蒂 你拿定主意了吗 Abed, are you sure about these?
是的 感觉就该这么做 Yeah. It just feels like the right thing to do.
我回来了 Hey, I made it back.
你们没死吗 怎么打赢吉尔伯特的 You guys never died. How did you beat Gilbert?
不就是 团队合作嘛 Oh, you know. Teamwork.
我们要去黑暗洞穴 We were headed for the black caves
找白水晶 to find the white crystal.
我们在跟阿布蒂告别 We were just saying good-bye to Abed.
我要留在村子里 帮助希尔达 I'm gonna stay here in the village with Hilda
重建家园 and help her rebuild her life.
阿布蒂 她是游戏角色 Abed, she's a program.
有人对我做出过相似的评价 People have said similar things about me.
不好 他要开始玩"雨人"那套了 Uh-oh. He's playing the rain man card.
咱快走吧 Let's bounce.
我还要赢继承权呢 I've got an inheritance to win.
村庄树林
懒惰山谷
这名字太无礼了 Offensive. Called it.
闭嘴 布雷塔 Shut up, Britta.
同志之岛
你在岛上表现不错 杰夫 You did great in there, Jeff.
闭嘴 皮尔斯 Shut up, Pierce.
免费轮渡
黑暗洞穴
好了 低头 保持 Okay, duck. Stay ducked.
好的 抬头 Okay, unduck.
好了 跳 Okay, now jump.
我想快到了 I think we're almost there.
谢天谢地 这洞穴差劲死了 Thank god. This cave is the worst.
就是 真不知道哪个更无礼 I know, I don't know what's more offensive-
直白的种族歧视 还是若有似无的 The actual racism or the insulting notion
针对咱们的侮辱性暗示 that it might somehow rub off on us.
小心 爵士火鸡 Look out! Jive turkeys!
在它们繁殖前干掉它们 Kill them before they start multiplying!
-受死吧 -接招 爵士火鸡 - Yeah, suck on this! - Take that, jive turkey!
太好了 白水晶 All right! The white crystal!
快拿 Get it!
我来拿 I'll take it.
因为我有朋友 才配拥有 I've earned it by having friends.
到了 This is it.
当然是到了 It certainly is.
-不是吧 -阴魂不散 - No, man! - You again?
现在水晶归我了 Now I'll have that crystal.
这个归你了 I think you'll have this.
不好意思 Whoops.
发箭 Arrows!
搞什么 不是吧 What? Come on!
你从哪里搞的这些装备 Where'd you get all that stuff?
你才玩了一个钟头 You've only been alive for an hour.
这太不公平了 Well, that was not fair.
你搞什么 吉尔伯特 What the hell, Gilbert?
你作弊 这个我没意见 You're cheating, which I have no problem with,
但你被抓住了 这可不够专业 but you're getting caught, and that's not cool!
别傻了 Yeah, don't be a knob.
我有权继承 That inheritance is rightfully mine!
有权? Rightfully?
我是他儿子 I'm his son.
我也是 So am I.
什么 这不可能 What? That can't be true.
-你有一半...白人血统 -转得好 - You're half... White. - Nice save.
你还记得你小时候的保姆 艾达吗 Do you remember your childhood nanny, Etta?
艾达有一个漂亮的表妹 Well, Etta had a hot cousin.
就是我妈 My mother.
明白了吗 皮尔斯 So you see, Pierce,
我是你同父异母的弟弟 I am your half-brother,
比起你 我更像是你父亲的儿子 and I am more your father's son than you ever were,
所以闭上嘴 继续玩游戏吧 so shut up and play the game.
走吧 皮尔斯 Let's go, Pierce.
听我说 我知道事情看起来已经绝望了 Okay, look, I know things seem hopeless
因为他已经带着白水晶前往城堡 because he's all the way to the castle with the crystal
而我们却重新开始 and we're starting over,
但事实是 but here's the thing-
我们现在更优秀了 We're better at this game now.
我们牺牲过重生过 我们是英雄 We've died and been reborn, and that makes us heroes.
去收拾他 Let's get him!
我想我们现在还能玩 I guess the fact that we're still playing
证明他还没赢 means he hasn't won yet.
是啊 但有什么用啊 Yeah, but what's the point?
他会一直作弊直到胜利 He'll just keep cheating until he wins.
为什么这些树被砍了 Why are all the trees cut down?
这里以前不是阿布蒂的村子吗 Isn't this where Abed's village was?
-老朋友 你们好 -阿布蒂 - Hello, old friends. - Abed!
还记得希尔达吧 You remember Hilda.
我住在村子里 我爱阿布蒂 I live in the village. I love Abed.
她刚才说的是你名字吗 Did she just say your name?
将角色的信任及情感等级 Yeah, if you max out a character's trust
加到最大 便可以进入 and affection levels, you can gain access
编写前端脚本语言 to a front-end scripting language.
看着 Watch.
选择: 制造阿布蒂宝宝
酷酷酷 Cool cool cool!
她可以为我制造宝宝 She can make babies for me.
我不可以是吧 Oh, and I can't?
我是不可以 I can't.
进来吧 Come on inside.
我是白手起家的 I built this from scratch.
来看我的城堡 Check out my castle.
很漂亮 Oh, it's nice.
希望这不是血泪黄金建的 I hope this isn't blood gold.
这是我家 This is my family.
阿布蒂宝宝拥有我的眼睛和她的帽子 Baby Abed has my eyes and her bonnet.
每个宝宝都可以执行定义代码 Each baby is capable of executing custom code,
就是说你可以编写代码 which means you can write a code
让一个宝宝告诉其他宝宝怎么做 that makes one baby tell another baby what to do,
跟真正的孩子在操场上的表现一样 much like real children on a playground.
阿布蒂 但是 Oh, Abed, but-
安妮 咱们等下再帮铁皮人找心 Annie, let's find the tin man's heart later.
阿布蒂 你这里有多少物资 Abed, how much stuff do you have here
我们可以用来做什么 and what can we make with it?
-这个要取决于 -什么 - That depends. - On?
你的想像力 On what you can imagine.
欢迎 Welcome.
你是第一个来到霍家堡王座的人 You are the first to make it to the throne of Hawkthorne.
让我看看你 Let me take a look at you.
根据你的肤色 According to your complexion,
我想你可能是吉尔伯特·罗森 I think you might be Gilbert Lawson.
是吗 Is this true?
等下 Just a moment.
你好 吉尔伯特 Hello, Gilbert.
因我们的关系性质决定 Due to the nature of our relationship,
这份有法律约束力的同意书 I'll need your electronic signature
需要你的电子签名 on this legally-binding agreement.
在此命令你永世不得用你那蛮夷之族的 It dictates that you will never, ever besmirch the Hawthorne name
妖异邪说败坏霍家的名声 with any outlandish notions regarding you genealogical origins.
你是有色淫妇和一个身份不明 You are the bastard offspring of a colored seductress
意志薄弱的混血主张者的孽种 and an unknown, weak-willed miscegenist...
你任何反对的论断 and any assertion on your part to the contrary
将成为没收继承权的理由 will be grounds for the seizure of this inheritance.
你同意吗 Do you agreed?
这是个很简单的问题 吉尔伯特 It's a simple question, Gilbert.
你同意吗 Do you agree?
不同意
多谢你的诚实 吉尔伯特 Thank you for being honest, Gilbert.
再见 Good bye.
不 No!
我是你儿子 I'm your son!
抱歉 吉尔伯特 I'm sorry, Gilbert.
我一早知道你会让我失望的 I always knew you'd disappoint me.
酷酷酷 酷酷酷 Cool cool cool! Cool cool cool!
看来你选择了团队合作 Ah, I see you've chosen teamwork.
胆小鬼的策略 A coward's strategy.
我会依此提升你的挑战等级 I will upgrade your challenge accordingly.
霍家堡
我的财产不会交给弱者 I bequeath my fortune to no inferiors.
-爽 -进攻 - Yeah! - Attack!
现在是什么情况 What's this now?
进攻咯 Here we go!
干掉他 瞄准关节 Get him! Aim for the joints!
干掉他 Get him!
种族歧视者 去死吧 Die, racism!
特洛伊和阿布蒂射击熔浆 Troy and Abed shooting lava.
受死吧 Take that!
嘿 快看我啊 老爸 Hey! Look at me now, dad!
我想你们很奇怪 玩家们 I suppose you're wondering, player,
为什么要录制自己呼吸不畅的声音 why record myself breathing weird
让你们摧毁我 and letting you destroy me.
因为我是个君子 Because I am a man of honor.
所以你们可以享受我的死亡带来的乐趣 So you've earned the pleasure of my death.
但我没参与 But I didn't.
战胜你的人不是我 I'm not the one that beat you.
就是你 Yes, you are.
我们弃权了 We're forfeiting.
警告 玩家弃权倒计时30秒 Warning, player forfeit in 30...
吉尔伯特 你是对的 Gilbert, you're right.
比起我 你才是他的儿子 You were more his son than me.
忍受他这么多年 You took all his crap
却没法跟他姓 and you didn't even get to take his name.
有次在教堂他坐在我身上只为看得更清楚 He once sat on me in church just so he could see better.
我们只玩了这游戏几小时 We've only been playing this game a couple of hours.
而你这辈子都在玩 You've been playing it your whole life,
现在是拿奖品的时候了 兄弟 and now it's time for your reward, brother.
所以快去吧 干掉咱老爸 So get in there and kill our dad.
谢谢你 皮尔斯 Thank you, Pierce.
等等 给 拿着 Wait a second. Here, take this.
-你可能会需要 -皮尔斯 - You may need it. - Oh, Pierce.
你真不知道这个是干嘛用的吧 You really don't know how this works, do you?
你一直带在身边吗 Are you always carrying that?
洗澡时不带 Not in the shower.
今天的事 再次谢谢你们 I'd like to thank you again for today
我为我的行为道歉 and offer my apologies for my conduct.
我完全疯了 I wasn't myself.
家庭 真能让人做一些疯狂的举动 Family can make a person do a lot of crazy things.
我知道 我有个叔叔自己做披萨吃 I understand. I have an uncle who makes his own pizza.
没事的 Don't worry about it.
如果这样能够算是小小补偿的话... If it would make it up to any of you in any way,
城里有间酒吧叫"斯奇普" there's a bar in town called Skeepers,
我听说他们有种特饮 and I hear they make a specialty drink-
玛格丽特酒 事实上 盛酒的玻璃器皿 A margarita, in fact, and it's served in a glass
有将近一米长 an entire yard long.
-我请客 -够意思 - My treat. - Score.
这是我人生中最美好的一天 This is the greatest day of my life.
我一直想有个兄弟 I've always wanted to have a brother.
随便问问 Hey, hey, settle a bet.
说黑白仔可以吗 还是找抽 The word "mulatto," is it okay or just borderline?
我们为他道歉 We apologize for him.
没事 家里人就这样 Oh, that's okay. He's family.
希尔达 我的爱人 Hilda, my love,
我说了会回来找你的 I said I'd come back for you.
不知道 我就是觉得在平行宇宙里 I don't know. I just think that in a parallel universe,
-河蟹们... -慢着 - blorgons are- - Hold on.
孩子 我没料到这个 A baby. I wasn't expecting this.
看来得养大他 Guess we'll have to support it.
我可以找工作 I guess I could get some kind of job,
比如说咖啡店 maybe at Beans and More.
可能一天要上两个班 但是 I'll probably have to work double shifts, but-
我看出来了 Oh, I see.
你在外面咖啡店升职发财 While you're off, climbing the ladder at beans and more,
我就在家一个人把他带大 I'll just stay home and raise him alone.
可以 我放弃自己的梦想好了 That's fine. I'll just give up on my dreams.
-又来了 -怎么了 - Here we go. - What?
他需要知道坚强的男人也可以流泪 He needs to learn a strong man can cry.
酷酷酷 Cool cool cool.
你刚说河蟹什么 So, what were you saying about blorgons?
河蟹 在其它平行宇宙里 Blorgons- in this other universe,
叫做河鳖 they're actually called glorbons.