三周前 Three weeks earlier.
啥 Huh?
有些电影或者电视剧 一开头就是在 You know how sometimes a movie or a show
一个引人入胜又没交待任何背景的场景中 begins on a random, intriguing scene with no context given
会让你禁不住去猜想 encouraging you to wonder whoa,
这剧情肯定超疯狂的 how'd this crazy scenario come to be?
然后画面一黑 出现一行字 And then it cuts to black and a title comes up and
三周前 says three weeks earlier.
我们现在就是 Here we are.
坐在房车里 一言不发地坐着 Sitting in silence, crammed into an RV.
颠簸在科罗拉多州的山路上 Winding through the mountain roads of Colorado
车顶上还绑了一个将近六米长的玻璃纤维手 with a 19 foot fiberglass hand tied to the roof.
如果哪个场景适合切出一个「三周前」 If there was ever a time to cut to three weeks earlier
那就是现在了 it'd be right now.
知道我是什么意思吧 Know what I mean?
埃尔罗伊 有酒吗 Elroy you got any booze?
别翻我东西 Don't go through my stuff!
这可不是巴士 This isn't a bus.
你站的是我客厅厨房卧室里 You're standing in my living room, kitchen, and bedroom.
我真没这么想过 Ooh I never thought about that.
那你家后院有40075公里 And your backyard is 24,900 miles long,
因为这是地球的周长 because it's the circumference of the Earth.
因为你 没有家 Because you have no home.
谁想喝水 Did anyone need water?
我们聊点别的什么 What else can we talk about?
要想开场更引人入胜 I guess to make it really intriguing,
我们当中最好有一个挂彩的 one of us should be visibly injured in a way
会让人纳闷到底怎么回事 that makes you wonder how it happened
比如布雷塔有个熊猫眼 Like if Britta had a black eye.
院长 能跟你单独聊两句吗 Dean, can I speak to you privately?
我肯定答案是不能 I'm pretty sure the answer is no.
马上来 Coming up.
当初我为了你为了学校 答应你这事的时候 You know, when I agreed to hold this thing for you and the school,
你可没告诉我会有六个人坐后面 you didn't say anything about six people sitting back there.
天啊 真想知道他们说什么呢 Man, I wonder what they're talking about.
天 那谁能知道啊 God! Who knows?
他们把那隔音塑料片子拉上了 They're sealed off behind this soundproof vinyl.
我要拖家带你们开下悬崖 I will drive my house off a cliff.
埃尔罗伊 我们不是来查你 Elroy, we're not here
也不是来评判你的 to snoop or judge you.
又不是只有你有脏盘子 小黄片 You're not the first person to have dirty dishes, CD rom porn and
还有跟俩混血少女在公园的合影 framed photos of yourself with two biracial teenagers in a park.
不是那事 It's not that.
多了这些重量 All of this weight.
我好像算错了公里数 I may have miscalculated the mileage.
真讨厌啊 我想劫持本辆房车 Darn it, I wanna hijack this RV,
可我被这2001年前款 but I'm foiled by its impenetrable
坚不可摧的安全措施阻挡在外了 post-2001 security measures.
你继续开你的 You keep driving
不用跟大家说这些 懂吗 and nobody else needs to know about this, understand?
我们现在最不需要的就是恐慌了 The last thing we need is a panic.
怎么回事 What's going on?
没油了吗 Are we out of gas?
是的 Yes!
已经指到空了 It's on empty!
感觉那指针都快看不见了 Like, the needle is invisible.
天啊 Oh, my God!
针都没了 There's no needle.
没了 它可能在塑料盖下面 It's gone. It's underneath the plastic or
也可能引擎把它当燃料给吞了 maybe the engine tried to use it as the fuel.
别喊了 Oh, stop yelling.
那你别没油啊 Well, stop being out of gas.
你吓到我了 You're freaking me out.
吓到就对了 You should be freaking out.
我开了二十五年的车了 I have been driving for 25 years,
这辈子就没见过那么低的油量 and I have never seen so little gas in my life.
安静 别喊了 Stop, stop,
我得喊的更大声让你们都安静 I'm yelling even louder so you have to stop.
我们控制不了油量 好吗 We're not in control of the gas, okay?
我们要把注意力集中在可控事件上 We have to focus on what we can control.
大家手机的电都充满了吗 Is everyone's phone charged?
对 给手机充电去 Yes. Charge your phones.
好主意 Good idea.
好 Okay.
充上了 Okay.
看到没 See?
我们将恐慌转变为了做准备 We turned panic into preparedness.
如果真没油了 看谁的手机电是充满的 Now if we do run out of gas, guess who's got fully charged phones?
满格电量 Well charged.
电量满满 Full battery.
我的上帝老天爷啊 你们可别充电了 For the love of God, stop charging your phones!
失陪一下 Excuse me a moment.
■
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-怎么回事 -我才不会告诉你 - What happened? - I'm not telling you!
有道理 Fair enough.
我们都要死了 We're all gonna die!
翻 译 夕橙空间盗梦寻找喀秋莎
翻 译 大菜穿越星际为口罗宋汤
翻 译 DayDay魔术致命不玩套娃
翻 译 蓬蓬裙记忆碎片不在莫斯科流眼泪
时 间 轴 姜姜骑士黑暗崛起吃大列巴
后 期 鱼骨头追凶白夜行不行
校对/总监 夕橙没疯
废柴联盟 第六季 第十集
三周前
全体同意吗 All in favor?
那大手的问题就解决了 And that solves the matter of the giant hand.
-如果没有别的事 -有 - If there's no other business. - Yes.
我建议将此刻 I'd like to move that we establish this moment
作为闪回的开头 as the opening for a flashback.
不 散会 No. Meeting adjourned.
看来我们不玩三周前那个哏了 Oh, I guess we'll not doing the three weeks earlier thing.
第四堵墙指的是演员观众之间的屏障
阿布蒂用第四堵墙手法插入对话 Abed insert dialogue here by you dropping the fourth wall shtick.
-漂亮 -小心别整满了 - Nice. - Careful you don't flood it.
你已经提醒了我五次别整满了 That's the fifth time you've reminded me not to flood something.
抱歉 可惜跟我们当前情景不符 I'm sorry but it doesn't apply to our situation.
我要去一下检查电池 I'm gonna check the battery.
你到底能不能派人来 Can you send someone or not?
能等一下吗 Can you please hold?
不行 等不了 No, I can't hold.
讨厌 Darn it.
当你被转到等待接听 就挂掉 马上再打 When they put you on hold, you hang up and you call right back.
弗兰教我的 Frankie taught me that.
你好 是我 Hi, it's me.
对 那个被你转到等待接听的人 Yeah, the one you put on hold.
被我逮到了吧 See where that got you?
你到底能不能派人过来 Can you send somebody or not?
-请稍等 -你敢 - Please hold. - Don't you dare.
当你被转到等待接听 就挂掉 马上再打 When they put you on hold, hang up and call right back.
这游戏老娘可以陪你玩一天 I can play this game all day.
-我说了我们需要道路救援 -请稍等 - I told you we need roadside service on - Could you please hold?
你不是玩我呢吧 Oh, you can't be serious.
你好 你猜我是谁啊 Well hello, guess who.
我有的是时间和拨号的手 哥们 I got nothing but fingers and time, pal.
道路救援 墨菲特路 Road side service, Moffett pass.
好的 好的 All right, all right.
你一小时前怎么不说 You, well, you could've told me that an hour ago.
房车里都是疯婆子 RV is full of crazy ladies.
你家房车里才都是疯婆子 再见 Your RV is full of crazy ladies, good bye.
你们听没听过军人节 Have any of you heard of Armed Forces Day?
看来就是今天 算我们倒霉 Because apparently it's today and it's really boning us.
对 今天是军人节 Yep, here it is, Armed Forces Day, huh.
为什么要定在五月呢 Why would they put it in May?
五月最后一个周末加周一
完全被阵亡将士纪念日抢风头啊 It's just sitting there in Memorial Day's shadow
12月25日 为期八天 跟圣诞节撞车
简直是军界光明节 like a military Hanukkah.
安排俩战争节日在同一个月 Fitting that both war holidays have to fight each other
简直就是让俩节撕逼啊 over the same month.
值得注意的是我们记住的那个节日 Notable that the one we remember
是有记忆主题的 is the one with the theme of memory.
刚刚好证明了你的敏感点没市场 Way to make this about justifying your unmarketable sensibilities.
显然这军人节 Well, apparently Armed Forces Day
对拖车司机很重要 is the big one for tow truck drivers.
因为方圆三百多公里的三位司机 Because there are three within 200 miles of this spot
都去参加这个游行了 and they're all in the same parade.
也许他们会路过这地方呢 Maybe it'll come by this way
如果我们提供些乐器 if we offer them instruments?
没人会更改游行路线 Nobody reroutes parades.
他们更改了肯尼迪总统游行的路线啊 They rerouted Kennedy's parade.
那我们给中情局打电话 So, we'll just call the CIA,
说我们要去暗杀总统 tell them we want to assassinate the President,
那我们就可以及时到家看「幸运之轮」了 and we'll be home in time for Wheel of Fortune.
我们骗谁呢 Who are we kidding?
这招肯定不行 That'll never work.
我们又布雷「砸」了 对 我也这么用 We got Britta'd, yes, I use it too.
我不希望这里有人为此而责怪自己 I don't want anybody here blaming themselves for this.
我希望大家要怪就怪弗兰 I want everyone blaming Frankie.
啥 What?
就是因为她我们才会来这里的 She is the reason we are here.
你在不对的时间里做出来的决定 This is what happens when you make decisions
就会导致这种结果 outside the moment.
我很想把自己抽离 Whatever moment you were in the day
你网购大手的那天的每一刻 you got on the Internet and bought a gigantic hand,
这样我到死都很会感激无比的 I am proud to remain outside until I die.
你会的 You will baby.
所以我在逻辑上就打败了你 And this is where logic gets you,
夕阳西下 你卡在落基山口 stuck in a Rocky Mountain pass at sundown,
一点点冻死 gradually freezing to death.
然后有可能哈 在某个地方 And forced to decide somewhere
还被人逼着背着我们 in the backs of our heads, just in case,
决定先吃掉我们之中的谁 who we'd eat first.
小安妮 对不对 Annie, right?
-啥 -不是真让你判断 就生理上来说 - What? - It's not a judgement, it's about biology.
说啥呢 What?
克拉格 这破手正在扼杀我们的生命 Craig, the hand currently crushing our lives
现在不是时间对不对的问题 is not about being in the moment.
是因为我们本来就没钱 你还买这东西 You bought this thing we can't return
退也退不回去 with money we don't have,
也没人知道为什么 nobody knows why.
你最后的办法是把它放在一块牌匾上 And your latest idea is to put it on the quad with a plaque
写上「帮帮你的大脑」 that says give a hand to your brain.
是「给你的大脑帮把手」 Give your brain a hand.
你故意让我的口号听起来蠢蠢的 You're making it sound stupid on purpose.
克拉格你真的够了 你有弗兰算你走运 It's over Craig, you are lucky to have Frankie.
算你走运 她还能帮你在易趣网上找到傻叉 And you're lucky she was able to find some weirdo,
哦错了 是极品傻叉愿意用现金来买这货 excuse me, bigger weirdo on eBay willing to pay cash for it.
这里用的是大量的叙事手法 This is a lot of narrative pipe.
估计我们真的应该用上「三周前」的倒叙 Maybe we did need a three weeks earlier flashback.
阿布蒂 你觉得我们现在在演戏吗 Abed. Is this a show?
我记得你好像说过这不是电视剧啊 I thought you said you knew it wasn't a TV show.
你是说在演第二季吗 Season two you mean?
那我就不知道了 I don't know.
我可以改主意 好商量 I can change my mind.
那我这样讲 你说我们在戏里但我说不是 Well can I ask that it not be a show about you saying it's a show?
因为剧情太傻叉 Because dumb.
你才傻叉 You're dumb.
你坐回去 Go in the back.
那你自己坐回去 Go in the back and sit by yourself.
杰夫 Jeff.
-一枪毙了他 -搞什么嘛你 - Give him a shot. - What's wrong with you?
我真是受够了好吗 I'm sick of it.
这是演戏 这不是演戏 It's a show, it's not a show,
该你演了 该我演了 it's your show, it's my show,
好戏啊好戏 烂剧啊烂剧 it's a good show, it's a bad show.
我真的受不了了好吗 I am sick of it.
我再也不想听到「戏」这个字啦 I don't want to hear the word show again.
戏戏戏 戏呀么戏戏戏 Show, show, show, is a show, show, show.
所以现在这段吐槽 是不是也是戏 So now it's a show about this?
有道理 这更可怕 Oh, you're right, that's way worse.
-阿布蒂 过来吧 -好嘞 - Abed, come back. - Yes.
-阿布蒂 过来 -好好好 - Abed, come back. - Yes, yes, yes.
我不道歉 I'm not sorry.
那我不高兴过来 It's not good to be back.
你们都在搞什么鬼 What the hell was that?
电池用光了 The battery is dead.
充满了吗 Flooded?
你有能耐你救我啊 So help me God.
房车有两块电池 The RV has two batteries,
-一块主电池 一块...-蓄电池 - a primary, and a second... - Secondary.
电气系统超负荷了 发动机电池牺牲了 We overloaded the electrical system, and killed the engine battery.
现在蓄电池可能 So now, the secondary battery has maybe
-有三四小时的电 -来充 - three or four hours of juice... - Charge,
三四小时电来充 juice, charge.
我们有两个选择 Then we have a choice to make.
接下来由杰夫来给大家解释一下具体选择 And Jeff can explain that choice.
不用了这是你的房车 No, it's your RV.
这是我导的戏 你们一点都不关心 This was my show. You didn't give a damn about that.
阿布蒂 我们都支持你的 Abed, we're all on your side,
如果你也支持你自己 这么说就太小气了 so if you're also on your side, it's petty.
我们可以等几个小时 We could wait for a couple of hours and
希望电池能自己重启 hope that the engine battery resets itself.
如果重启不了 我们就在这过夜 If it doesn't, then we're spending the night here,
至少蓄电池能给我们 and at least we have the secondary battery
供几个小时的暖 to keep us warm for a few hours.
别别别 我们千万别在这过夜 No, no, no, we're not spending the night here,
第二个选择是什么 so what's the second option?
也就是我说的「行动步骤」是什么 Which I am nicknaming little course of action.
我重新给蓄电池接线到发动机上 I rewire the secondary battery to the engine
希望能启动 and hope it can start it.
如果这也失败了 就得和两块用光的电池 If it doesn't we're spending a very cold night
在这里度过一个非常寒冷夜晚 with two dead batteries.
那好 我们把两块电池换过来吧 Okay, let's switch the batteries then.
很民主吧 Good democracy.
我们能保证蓄电池真的没有用光吗 Are we sure the secondary battery won't just die too?
-呵呵 -有这个可能性 - Ha. - It's a possibility.
很有可能哦 It exists.
不过我还是很有信心的 But I'm pretty confident,
因为蓄电池只给内舱供电 because the secondary battery only powers the cabin.
而且我们把灯都关了 And we've kept the lights off and
更不用说 it goes without saying that
我们都没有再给手机充电了 we've all learned to stop charging our phones.
为什么你们都这副表情 Why you all looking at each other like that?
你们手机现在都在哪 And where are each of your phones now?
话说我正在想一些不敢想的事情了 You know, I'm starting to suspect the unthinkable.
也就是说 不管我们再怎么有经验 Namely, that in spite of all we've experienced,
现在我们房车里有很多个人电子设备 there's a cartoonish vampiric orgy of personal devices
如卡通版的吸血鬼一样 somewhere in the RV
疯狂吮吸着所剩无几的电池饕餮盛宴 sucking away our remaining battery.
我现在略略不爽 因为现在 I only draw limited comfort from the fact
还没有人跑去拔掉任何东西 that nobody's running to unplug anything.
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不过你们知道吗 You know what?
啥也不用说 Say nothing.
就让我静静地把灯打开 I'll just, turn the light switch to the on position.
事情还有好的一面 There is a bright side to this.
很多常规武器是不用电的 Most conventional weapons don't require electricity.
你是要先吃掉我吗 Are you going to eat me first?
你们听到蟋蟀叫了吗 Hear those crickets?
你在这里做脱口秀估计是有点难 This would be a challenging place to practice your stand-up act.
我之前租了卢旺达饭店的碟 So I rented Hotel Rwanda the other night.
事先说明 不适合约会看 And let me just say, not a date movie.
如果阿诺·施瓦辛格被德古拉咬了 What would Arnold Schwarzenegger sound like
他会怎么叫啊 if he was bit by Dracula?
三周前
大家都同意吗 All in favor?
那大手的问题就解决了 Then that solves the matter of the giant hand.
如果没有别的事... If there's no other business...
如果我们要这么干的话 我想用闪回 If we're doing this I'd like to restate
来重申讲述这个故事的重要性 importance of telling some of this story with flashback.
什么叫重申啊 What do you mean by restate?
我的天 我又上当了 Oh my God, I fell for it.
散会 Meeting adjourned.
为什么它们叫肘子呢 Why do we call them elbows?
为什么不叫手膝盖呢 Why not arm knees?
老天 我要死在这了 Man, I am dying up here.
我根据每人手机的瓦数给你们分配毛毯 I'm scaling the blanket rations inversely
谁瓦数多 谁拿的少 to the wattage of each person's phone.
这样呢 害我们越多的人死得越快 That way the person who killed us the most will die the soonest,
感觉公平 which feels fair.
对不对呀布雷塔 Right, Britta?
我可不能整晚都这么生气 I can't go all night being this angry.
我家有心脏病史 你们这帮货不值得我犯病 Heart attacks run in my family and you people aren't worth it.
对不起 I'm sorry.
没事 It's okay.
也是因为我没加满油才导致现在的情况 I caused the situation by not topping off the tank,
那个塑料折叠隔板就是人与人不信任的象征 and that vinyl accordion partition is a totem of distrust.
我也为这句话抱歉 Sorry for that, too.
埃尔罗伊 你太大气了 Elroy, that's big of you.
我们为给自己完全正常能用的手机充电 And for our part, we're sorry that charging our perfectly normal
并毁了你又怪又脆弱的房车表示道歉 cell phones destroyed your weirdly fragile RV.
好吧 刚刚那个道歉我也表示道歉 Okay, I'm sorry about that apology.
我努力做个好房客 I'll try to be a better house guest.
不对 Oh, no.
不好意思 刚才不跟你们交谈 Sorry I've been unavailable,
因为我是想把画面切到三周前 I've been trying to cut to three weeks earlier.
真的感觉我们需要闪回 Really feels like we needed that.
我也有事情需要道歉 I have something to apologize for as well.
你们有没有想起早些时候 Perhaps you recall earlier when it seemed
我们好像闻到一股子臭鼬味儿 as though we drove through a skunk patch.
是啊 那时候你正嗨着 Yeah, you were getting high.
-当时你在吸大麻 -你嗨大了 - Yeah, you were smoking pot. - Yeah, getting high.
你都嗨晕了 You were getting stoned.
好吧 我以为自己糊弄成功了呢 okay, I remember thinking I really pulled that one off.
你那么以为是因为你吸嗨了 You thought that because you were high.
你还以为我们在飙车呢 You also thought that we were speeding
因为你一直看见同一只鸟 cause you kept seeing the same bird.
三周前
都同意吗 All in favor?
那大手的问题就解决了 Then that solves the matter of the giant hand.
如果没有别的事... If there's no other business...
请容许我在此解释一下闪回的必要性 Let me just explain the need for flashback here
不要打断我 and don't interrupt...
好吧 简单说一句 Okay, one quick thing
然后随你怎么说闪回 and then you can talk about flashbacks forever.
散会 Meeting adjourned.
阿布蒂 Abed?
电视剧闪回到三周前的时候 When they cut to three weeks earlier on TV,
他们也不是在穿越 笨蛋 they're not traveling in time, dip ass.
杰夫 Jeff.
好了 该我道歉了 Okay, my apology now.
我一直在想这事儿 I've had some time to think about it,
现在我觉得 我很抱歉 and I've decided, I'm sorry for
在这次旅行之前 not asking people what they wanted
没有征询大家意见就擅自买了零食 before buying all the snacks for the trip.
真的吗 Wow, really?
-太棒了 -怎么了 - That's great. - What?
我在这次旅行中就做了这么一件称得上坏的事 Think about it, it's the worst thing I've done on this trip.
而且我搞定了 I've been nailing it.
没错 She has.
你做到了 但我却没有 You have, I haven't been.
我不该在你们任何人面前对院长大喊大叫的 I shouldn't be yelling at the dean in front of any of you,
太不专业了 it's unprofessional.
没事的 弗兰 You're all right, Frankie.
我们不怪你 We got no complaints.
我原谅你们了 I forgive all of you.
什么 What?
三周前
那大手的问题就解决了 Then that solves the matter of the giant hand.
如果没有别的事... If there's no other business...
一般公路电影是这样的 In a normal road trip story,
第一幕基本是以决定上路作终 the first act would end with us deciding to go on the trip.
第二幕以灾难出现结束 The second act would be the trip ending with a disaster,
第三幕是最终安全归来 and the third act would be us getting back.
现在的问题是 The problem is that
我们几周前就已经决定要上路 we've already decided to take this trip weeks from now,
就是说故事的开始我们已经在路上了 which means the story starts with us already on the road,
这就意味着第一幕的最后不是我们决定上路 which means the end of act one won't be us going on the trip,
而是灾难的开始 it'll have to be the disaster.
也就是说第二幕中会出现更可怕的事 which means something even worse has to happen in act two.
除非现在我们在第一幕的闪回里 unless we make the decision, right now,
也就是现在要做出决定 that act one is a flashback,
这样现在就是第一幕了 而开头不算第一幕 so that the beginning story is now instead of then.
你原谅我们了 You forgive us?
当然 Absolutely.
你个小人 You turd!
你说什么 I beg your pardon.
-伙计们 -你这人一点责任心都没有 - Guys? - You have no sense of accountability.
你就像个孩子 You're like a child.
如果我是孩子 你就是虐童狂 If I'm a child, you're a child abuser.
这可不好 安妮 No, not cool, Annie.
你从没说过 别碰我的手 You never just said, leave my hand where it is,
我喜欢它在那儿 我要求保留它 I like it there. I demand it stay.
因为人人都在抱怨 Because everyone complained about it.
我们不是说好要放下面子的嘛 Well, where's that commitment to spinelessness
我们都主动承认自己犯的错了 when we're all admitting we did stuff wrong?
好吧 对不起 Okay, I'm sorry.
对不起 I'm sorry.
我是个坏院长 行了吧 I'm a bad dean, okay?
不行 你总这样 No, that's what you always do.
这不是真正的道歉 That's not a real apology.
-杰夫 -阿布蒂 闭嘴 - Jeff? - Abed, shut up.
自己一边玩你的剪辑闪回去 Go flashback and cut to stuff.
而你 要为自己 And you, say you're sorry for
买下那只大手 置之不管 buying a giant hand and letting it sit around
直到我们介入解决这件事而道歉 until we had to deal with it,
而且道歉的时候不许哭 and say it without crying.
不 No!
我是个大人了 I'm an adult.
你们凭什么不许我哭 And you can't make me not cry.
你们这群恶棍 You're all a bunch of bullies,
我想怎么道歉就怎么道歉 and I will say, I'm sorry, however I want.
你们猜怎么着 我还偏不道歉 And by the way, I'm not sorry!
这是我的大手 我喜欢它 It's my giant hand and I love it.
我们不卖了 We're not selling it.
这就像养了一只小狗 Okay, this is like crate training a puppy.
人人都使出浑身解数 就为了逗他出来 Everyone suppress every instinct you have to let him out
让他和我们一块儿睡 and sleep in bed with us.
冷 Cold.
我是说房车里好冷 No, I mean, it's cold in the RV.
才不是今晚我们对院长的所作所为 I don't care how we treat the dean tonight.
阿布蒂 别出去 Abed, don't go out.
他们让你出来继续讽刺我的吗 Did they send you out here to be mean to me too?
-不是 -太好了 - No. - Good.
再不补充电解质 我都哭不出来了 Because I can't cry anymore unless someone brings me a Pedialyte.
过来 Here.
挺好的 是不是 Pretty comforting, huh?
我们本可以把它放在艺术系 生物学门口 We could've put it outside the Art Department, or Biology,
或者掰掉一根指头 放木雕系那里 or wood working if we remove one of the fingers.
你不属于这上面 You don't belong up here.
你上来就不对头了 It's not right that you're up here.
你懂的 是不是 阿布蒂 You get it, don't you, Abed?
你知道这手的意义 You know what's important about the hand?
不 我只知道故事哪里重要 No, I know what's important about the story,
而且我知道灾难早该出现了 and I know we're structurally overdue for a disaster.
太棒了 Oh, great.
我还以为会有一个人是站在我这边 Figures the one person on my side,
结果这人是拿人当棋子玩呢 is the one playing people chess.
别动 别动 Don't move, don't move!
我们还能怎么办 What the hell else are we supposed to do?
和我一起闪回 Flashback with me.
-什么 -相信我 - What? - Just trust me.
我把闪回定在了三周前 I set a flashback three weeks earlier.
那就是故事的开头 It's how this story begins.
闭上眼睛 集中注意 Close your eyes and concentrate.
三周前
那大手的问题就解决了 And that solves the matter of the giant hand.
如果没有别的事... If there's no other business...
还有事 Oh, there's business.
是啊 还有事呢 Yeah, there's business.
当你们把大手锁上车顶的时候 When you tie the hand to the roof
请记得多锁几道 we'd like you to use extra thick straps please.
多锁几道 Extra thick.
多锁几道 Extra thick straps!
加固 Reinforced.
好了 散会 太好了 All right. Meeting adjourned, great.
多锁几道 Extra thick straps!
多锁几道 Extra thick straps.
这样应该可以了 There, that should do it.
什么可以了 Wha, wha, what should do it?
我们多锁了几道 We made the straps extra thick.
-记得吗 -不 我不记得 - Remember? - No, I don't remember
因为根本没发生过 because it didn't happen.
没发生吗 It didn't?
怎么回事 What?
刚刚是不是有什么东西从车顶掉下来了 Did something just fall off the roof?
这问题真蠢 安妮 That's a really stupid question, Annie.
显然是有东西掉下来了 Obviously something fell off the roof.
正确的问题是 什么掉下来了 The question is what?
阿布蒂 院长呢 Abed, where's the dean?
糟糕 快 Oh, damn, come on.
好了 一 二 三 Okay, one, two, three.
小心 小心 Carefully, carefully.
手怎么会这样无缘无故砸到人身上呢 How do you lose a hand off a person haphazardly?
知道吗 安妮 You know what, Annie.
院长 撑住 Dean, hang on.
院长 对不起 我们爱你 Dean, we're so sorry, we love you.
去你们的 Screw you!
什么 What?
那是我的家 Hey, that's my house.
我们才不抱歉 我们恨你 We are not sorry, we hate you!
咱们是不是要被冻死了 Are we gonna freeze to death?
这个手是我的了 I call the hand.
玻璃纤维会保存身体的热量 The fiberglass will preserve body heat.
我居然觉得这样很性感 我脑子是不是有病 What's wrong with me if that's hot?
院长 现在的温度正在削弱我们的免疫系统 Dean these temperatures are lowering our immune systems
而这个世界上挤满了没打疫苗的小破孩 in a world that is swarming with weird people's unvaccinated toddlers.
我管你去死 Deal with it.
我去那边看看 I'm gonna go run to the other side
他是不是把那边的车门也锁了 and see if he's locked that door too.
也许大声宣布这主意会达不到我的预期目的 It probably undercuts my goals to announce it out loud
但我是语言思考者 but I'm a verbal thinker,
有时候我得等到说出来才知道我心里有主意 I'm not even sure I have an idea until I say it.
登山鞋的鞋尖上应该放一个指南针 They should make hiking boots with a compass in the toe.
快去 Go!
你们真是的 But don't you.
院长 我们抱歉 我们爱你 Dean, we're sorry and we love you?
这种无法控制的疑问语气真有种啊 布雷塔 Nice uncontrollable question mark, Britta!
你连装一下都装不好吗 You can't even fake it!
院长 我们好抱歉 我们好爱你 Dean, we're sorry and we love you.
好逼真哦 安妮 你是真正的反社会 Super realistic, Annie, you're a real sociopath.
紧急关头 我算把你们的真面目都看清了 I saw all your true colors when the chips were down.
阿布蒂是你们之中唯一算得上是人的 Abed is the only human among you!
我想各位也清楚这有多讽刺 And I think we all know how ironic that is,
无意冒犯 阿布蒂 no offense, Abed.
没关系 None possible.
阿布蒂 你跟他感情深 Abed, you bonded with him.
跟他说话 Talk to him.
达阵区里只有你一人 You're alone in the end zone.
这个球只能是你的 别无他人 This ball is yours or nobody's.
鉴于本人众所周知的运动热情 I appreciate your appeal to my well know
感谢你的盛情呼唤 passion for athletics,
还有讽刺 但我跟他感情真心不深 and sarcasm, but I didn't actually bond with him.
我差点害死了他 I almost killed him.
我对人为闪回技术的单纯痴迷使得我自己 My naive obsession with contrived flashback technique has kept me
一直没有投入到这个实际的故事中 from being invested in any of this actual story.
这到底算个啥呢 I mean, what was it even?
一部房车里的一群人 难道我得用诺兰大法吗 A bunch of people in an RV? And I had to Christopher Nolan it?
这就是了 Well, there you go.
现在你得忘记所有 Now you can forget all about
关于什么闪回三周前的胡思乱想 stupid three weeks earlier flashbacks
加入我们 成为英雄 就在此刻 and be a hero by joining us here, in the moment,
像真正的人一样跟院长谈话 and talking to the dean like a human.
-这才是我的故事轴线 -这就是你的轴线 - That's my arc. - That's your arc.
好 那就开始吧 Okay, here we go.
三周前
如果没有别的事 If there's no other business.
我想提议本集大量使用闪回片段 I'd like to propose a heavy use of flashback in this episode.
不要 阿布蒂 别这么做 No Abed, don't do it.
谢了 阿布蒂 Thanks Abed.
别闹了 Stop that.
清醒一点 回到现实吧 Get your head out of your ass.
我不知道怎么做 我现在满脑子都是这个 I don't know how. I'm over saturated with it.
-你给我 -我不知道什么算现实 - Give me, - I, I, I don't know what's real.
你在说谎 You are lying.
你别再说谎了 You have to be lying.
-你很享受这样是吧 -住手 - You enjoy this. - Stop this.
你发什么疯 What has gotten into you?
他跟人不合群 你何必这么震惊 Why are you shocked that he's alienated?
那换你来 在不虐待他的情况下 You get him to do something normal
让他干点正常事儿 without abusing him.
阿布蒂 听我说 Abed, listen.
现在这是闪回 记得吗 This is a flashback remember.
真正的故事发生时间是在未来 The real story is happening in the future.
你是闪回回来帮我们的 You actually flashed back to now to help us.
说得真挺棒的 Okay, that was pretty good.
30个标准的银河时间单位之后
数个世纪以前在这发生的事情真是让人伤悲 So sad what happened here, all those centons ago.
真伤悲 So sad.
真的可以防止的 So preventable.
时空长老阿布蒂 你能用念力逆转时间 Space Elder Abed, can you reach backward with your mind
拯救我们人类吗 and save our species?
我可以 I can.
我是时空长老布雷塔 I'm Space Elder Britta.
你们刚刚在聊什么 What are you guys talkin about?
我来了 孩子们 I'm here now, child.
一切都会重回正轨的 All will be made right.
-院长 -阿布蒂 - Dean. - Abed.
我已经发现这只大手的含义了 I have discovered the meaning of the giant hand.
手有两个功能 抓住和放开 A hand has two functions, to grip and to release.
但如果没有这两种力量 也是无用之手 But without both of these powers, it is useless.
就像刚出生的婴儿一样 Like newborn infants,
什么离得近 我们就抓住什么 we grab what comes near us,
想着能控制它 品尝它 hoping to control it, taste it,
拿着它往别的孩子眼睛上戳 jam it into another child's eye.
但 我们用来控制自己世界的时候 But, the time we spend in control of our world,
同时我们也在一直放走了其他东西 is the time we spend letting go of others.
创意 故事 骄傲 Ideas, stories, pride,
身穿柔软毛衣的萌妹 电玩 girls in soft sweaters, video games,
拌了黄油的面条 紧抓一个东西的时间太长 buttered noodles, grip one for too long
从而错失了太多从未握住过的东西 and you lose so much that you've never held.
这只大手 是送给我们所有人的一个邀请 This giant hand, was sent to all of us as an invitation.
让我们的紧握能力能得以增长 To increase our mastery over the power to hold on.
然后再洒脱放手 And let go.
对不起 Sorry.
-笨蛋 -人家真是有点恨你了 - Dummy. - I kinda hate you.
那边的车门也锁上了 The doors are locked on that side, too.
你去的可真够久的 Took you long enough.
要是我说我没在上大号 那肯定是在说谎 I'd be lying if I said I didn't poop.
那拜托你能撒一下谎不 Could you lie then?
当然可以 Sure I can.
我还打了他一耳光 I slapped a man.
三天后
你死去哪儿了 Where were you?
保持轻握
你好 我是布莱克 Hi, this is Blake,
就是你那个大手的买主 the gentleman to whom you're selling the giant hand.
我打电话来是想确认一下你记的地址没错吧 I am calling to confirm that you have the correct address?
我们家就在一条很长的车道尽头 We live at the end of a long driveway
这条车道经常会跟一条路搞混 which often gets confused with a road.
总之距离咱们预定的交货时间 Anyway, it's been many hours
已经过了好几个小时了 since our scheduled appointment time.
重复一下 我是名字以B开头的布莱克 Again, it's Blake with a B,
那只大手的买家 the purchaser of the giant hand.
再见 Bye.
他们不会来了 对吧 They're not coming, are they?
我不知道 凯伦 我留了言 I don't know, Karen. I left a message.
你要怎么办... What are you gonna do with?
我要拿这只大表怎么办吗 What am I gonna do with the giant watch?
我也不知道 I don't know.
我也没打算失败的 I, I don't plan for failure.
你有打算过成功吗 Have you tried planning for success?
你对这个家做的事有过... Does everything you do to this family have.
不要 停止你的想法 No. Finish your thought.
不许你再想了 Finish your thought.
我做的所有的事情是吧 Does everything have to do with me,
网购各种超大型物品什么的是吧 purchasing oversize items on the Internet.
但这根本不是你的真正意思 不是吗 But, that's not what this is really about, is it?
这跟大手 大手表没什么关系 It's not about a giant hand, or a giant watch.
别说了 Please don't.
你要说的是一个正常尺寸的儿子 It's about a normal sized son.
他失踪了 而且全都是我的错 Who disappeared and it's all my fault,
因为我送了他一个超大型风筝 because I gave him a giant kite!
没错 难道这些之间都没有关系吗 Yes, how could you not make that connection?
你为什么要一直去买 Why do you continue to buy
各种日用品的超大版本呢 giant size versions of everyday objects,
-尤其正是咱们儿子 -消失的罪魁祸首 - when they are the reason our son is - Disappeared!
消失了 Disappeared.
地面上一直没找到儿子的尸体 They never found his body on the ground,
这证明了他还在天上等着我们 which proves he's still up there waiting.
他还在等着一个更好的父亲 He's waiting for a better daddy,
有着更大的手 with a bigger hand.
这样啊 Oh, really?
那为啥要买手表呢 So then why the watch?
我觉得这样会看起来很酷 I thought it would look really cool.
我要去遛狗 然后离开你 I'm gonna walk the dog, and eventually leave you.
那我把手表放车库 I'll put the watch in the garage.
大概就不洗澡了吧 And probably stop showering.
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你看懂了吗 Did you get any of that?