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翻译： NANA TanKnoX 碧落 黑里黑外 Goldencui
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后期制作: loved 校对: NANA 监制: NANA
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前情提要
知道我的幻想是什么吗 You know what my fantasy is?
我明早醒来 I wake up tomorrow,
我的电视台就播上了你们的剧 and I've got your show on my network.
什么 让我们去洛杉矶 What, us come to LA?
我们讨论一下演职人员吧 Let's talk about casting.
朱利安已经答应我们的邀请 Well, we already have Julian committed
将再次出演莱曼这个角色 to recreate the role of Lyman.
拉到了马特·勒布朗入伙 We got Matt LeBlanc!
好耶 Yeah!
你们想让我来演那个老胖子的角色 谢了 You want me for the old fat guy's part? Thanks!
-我们没想让你演 -再说一次 谢了 We don't want you. Again, thanks!
马特跟我说了关于他角色的改动 Matt's been telling me about the changes for his character.
我很喜欢他扮演教练 I love that he's a coach.
我们可以命名为《冰球小子》 We can call it pucks!
我有没有说过我讨厌这部戏 Did I mention I hate this show?
有这个印象 I believe it's come up.
你比她可迷人多了 You're much more attractive than she is.
真的 她一看就是整过容的 You are. She's all plastic.
那对胸啊 Those boobs...
恶心 Yuk.
你是一位非常 非常有才华的编剧 You are a brilliant, brilliant writer.
你知道这是为什么 You know what this is about!
莫宁吗 天呐 Morning? Oh, my god!
我对她一点感觉都没有 Look, I have no interest in her at all!
贝贝 停车 你走错边了 Bev, stop! you're on the wrong side!
不 肖恩 走错的是你 No, Sean, you're on the wrong side!
我不是那个意思 That's not what I meant!
你是不是插了我老婆 Did you shag my wife?
完全是她挑起的 She totally started it, ok. She was
她逆向行车 driving on the wrong side of the street.
所以你就操她了 So you fucked her?!
和他搞过的这个念头 从生理上让我反感 The thought that I was with him physically disgusts me.
-我真的感到反胃 让我想吐 -得了吧 - I'm actually nauseated, it makes me want to vomit. - All right!
我不是想吓唬谁 但是我觉得 Not to get too melodramatic, but I think...
你已经伤透了我的心 You've broken my heart.
我们大受欢迎 'We're a hit!'
什么 What?
试映观众们很喜欢《冰球小子》 The test audiences loved pucks!
你什么意思 What are you saying?
我的意思是把行李都放回去吧 I'm saying unpack those bloody bags,
你们还有电视剧要拍呢 you've got some telly to make!
戏里戏外
四个月后
拜托 怎么了 C'mon, what's going on?
没事 我好着呢 Nothing, I'm fine.
听着 Hey, listen,
我不仅仅是你的教练 我也是你的朋友 I'm not just your coach, I'm also your friend.
他两个爹要分开了 His dads are getting separated.
两个同性恋爹 The gay dads?
对 不是两个异性恋爹 Right! Not his two straight dads.
好吧 Ok...
一个爹跟一个女的搞上了 One of my dads had an affair with a
现在人家说自己是双性恋 woman and now he's saying he's bi.
而另一个爹呢 说他这是中年危机罢了 But my other dad says it's just a mid-life crisis.
然后呢 他搞上的这个女的 Oh, and the woman he had the affair with is the
是贡献了卵子并且生了我的代孕母亲 surrogate whose egg they used to make... me.
有什么想法吗 教练 Thoughts, coach?
咔 Cut!
今天干得不错 大家 Nice work today, everyone.
检查镜头 Check the gate.
不坏嘛 Not bad.
-我觉得进行的不错 -新来的男孩挺棒的 - I think that worked. - The new boys are pretty good.
-什么 -发型那样的那个 - What? - The one with the hair.
斯透克 Stoke.
斯透克 什么样的家长给孩子取名叫斯透克 Stoke! What kind of a parent names their child Stoke?
对啊 I know.
这样一搞 这孩子最好是长得帅 It's like saying you'd better be attractive,
否则这辈子就在嘲讽中过去了 or it's all going to be ironic from here on in.
作为一名演员 他倒长得还不错 Well, as an actor, he's lucky he's cute.
等等 像这样 天 你牙可真多 Wait. Go like this... god, you've got a lot of teeth.
就那儿 Right there.
-什么 -有个东西 - What? - You've got a thing.
虞美人籽 估计是早上吃的百吉饼里的 Hmm, poppy seed. Must be from my bagel this morning.
那它在那卡了一天了 你怎么不告诉我 So that's been there all day, why didn't you tell me?!
我告诉你了啊 I just told you.
现在才说 所有人都看见了 Yeah, now, after everyone's already seen it!
行 那又塞回去 Ok, put it back!
-晚安 -晚安 - Night. - Night.
-今天干得不错 -谢谢 - Good job today. - Thank you.
干得不错 Yeah, nice work.
-内裤不错 -谢谢 - Nice underpants. - Thanks.
你们喝咖啡吗 Hey, do you guys ever drink coffee?
有家公司给我送了十多台咖啡机 Cos this company sent me, like, a dozen free coffee makers.
为什么 Why?
不知道 谁管呢 I don't know. Who cares?
反正免费 你要一台吗 They're free, you want one?
-我不用了 谢谢 -谢谢你 - Oh, I'm all right. No thanks. - Thank you.
-今天还不错吧 -是滴 - So today went well? - Absolutely.
你们还开心吧 You guys are happy?
-相当地 -晚安 - Very. - Night.
晚安 Night.
-我要台咖啡机吧 -我问你了吗 - I'll take a coffee maker. - Did I ask you?
你今晚打算怎么过 What are you thinking about for tonight?
我想我得再把第三幕过一遍 I thought I'd have another go at that third scene.
如果你想跟我过一遍 我就在家 Well, if you want to run it by me, I'll be home.
剔牙 Flossing.
行 晚安了 Right, well, have a nice night.
你也是 明天见 You too. See you tomorrow.
嘿 Hey!
你还好吧 You all right?
我很好 I'm great.
看着可不怎么好 Don't look great.
默克和我去买戒指了 Merc and I went ring shopping.
我的天呐 Oh my god!
给他老婆买 For his wife.
他带你去给他老婆买戒指 He took you ring shopping for his wife?!
他再残忍也不能这么过分吧 That sounds cruel, even for him.
是他们的纪念日 他也知道自己品位糟糕 It's their anniversary, and he knows he has terrible taste,
所以他让我陪他去买点漂亮的东西 So he wanted me along to help him buy something pretty.
亲 Oh, honey...
他对她真是太好了 He's so good to her.
这个嘛 Well...
我看上了一个华美无比的戒指 I found this really gorgeous ring.
我就一直在想 她是个瞎子 And all the time I'm thinking, "the woman is blind!
新戒指给我 随便拿个旧戒指给她就好了 "buy me a fucking ring and give her one of her old ones!
她又看不出来 how will she know?!"
然后我又为我有这种想法感到愧疚 And then I feel guilty for thinking that, like,
我实在太坏了 "oh, I am this terrible person."
搞错没 你要跟我计较这个吗 Really? We're gonna pull at that thread?
-抱歉 -该道歉的是我 - Sorry. - No, I'm sorry.
今晚你才是主角 Tonight's supposed to be about you.
好了 好了 OK, OK.
我回过神了 I'm here now.
我很好 来庆祝吧 I'm great! let's celebrate.
庆祝《冰球小子》 Here is to Pucks!
明晚大首播 Big premiere tomorrow night.
我待会还要看剧本呢 I've got to read a script later.
想让剧本变得好笑吗 Want to make it hilarious?
这是什么 Ooh, what's this?
是给肖恩的 It's for Sean...
你又在想全世界只有你没有礼物收 And now you're thinking everyone's getting presents but you.
我又没有说出来 I didn't say it out loud.
今天是他生日 头一回不在一起过 It's his birthday. Our first one apart.
所以 应该挺有趣 So, that'll be fun!
你给他买了什么 Aah. What d'you get him?
手表 他一直想要的百瑞灵的古董手表 A watch. It's a vintage Breitling he's always wanted.
他肯定会喜欢的 So he'll love that.
也许他会觉得这份礼太大了 Or, he'll think it's way over the top and
显得我很绝望 很依赖他似的 I'll come off as desperate and needy.
有可能 Or that.
我讨厌这样 他可是我老公啊 I hate this. This is my husband!
而现在他就像是个 Now it's like he's some boy
还不知道会不会喜欢我的男孩子 who may or may not still like me.
去他妈的 Oh, fuck it!
从个人经验来看 Speaking from my own relationships,
偶尔有些"依赖"并不是坏事 a little "needy" isn't always a bad thing.
-真的吗 -即使你可能 - Really? - I mean even though you might
显得有些可悲 come off as kind of pathetic,
从更深的层面看 on a deeper level,
通过批判你 能让他觉得自己很伟岸 by being able to judge you, it allows him to feel empowered,
很多男人需要这个 所以他会更爱你 and a lot of men need that. So, it makes them love you more.
所以基本上来说 So basically, if I'm ever feeling like
如果我感觉自己是世界上最疯狂的人 the craziest person on the planet,
跟你吃个饭就好了 I should just have dinner with you.
我正是为此而来 That's what I'm here for.
还没开播呢 他们想整死咱们啊 We're not even on the air yet and they're fucking killing us!
没一句好的 There's not one good one.
那就别看了 So stop reading them.
-天啊 -怎么 - Jesus! - What?
《纽约邮报》的文章 The New York Post...
《冰球小子》 难看到死 "Pucks! sucks!"
瞧这名取的 Well, we just handed him that one.
这是标题吗 《冰球小子》难看到死 What, that's the headline? "Pucks! Sucks!"?
对 然后不停地说我们很蠢 Right. Then he goes on to say we're not clever.
别看了 别折磨自己了 Please. Stop. Do not do this to yourself.
《娱乐周报》 勒布朗参演"乐不了" Entertainment Weekly - "LeBlanc shoots a le blank."
至少还有人在标题上下了点功夫 Well, at least someone gave it some thought.
"真不敢想象 "It's hard to imagine how this show
这剧居然在英国撑了四季" lasted four seasons in the UK."
因为英国版的不是这样的 蠢货 Because it wasn't this show, arsehole!
你们找我吗 Did you want me?
什么 What?
没有 No.
好吧 OK.
等等 看这个 《赫芬顿邮报》 Oh wait, wait, here we go. Huffington Post.
"我本已做好准备 "I was totally prepared
要讨厌今晚的新喜剧《冰球小子》 to hate tonight's new comedy Pucks!
还好 我做足了准备" "well the good news is, I was prepared."
他们为什么都不喜欢我们 Why do they hate us?
因为他们是白痴 Because they're idiots!
没叫你 No!
怎么这么大怨气 不就是个电视剧吗 So much rage. Why? It's just a little TV show.
一个剧而已 我们又没有痛扁埃尔默 It's not like we're punching Elmo, it's just a show!
[儿童节目《芝麻街》角色]
-谢谢 -轻松又幽默 - Thank you! - It's light, it's funny.
必须的 Absolutely.
虽然不是天才之作 I mean, it's not brilliant.
但也不是"令人劳神费力的90年代老套喜剧 But is it "an exhausting rehash of '90s sitcom cliches
马特·勒布朗江郎才尽还用力过猛" "with Matt LeBlanc digging into his old bag of tricks and coming up short"?
你为什么要念这条 Why d'you have to read that one?
他们好像看透了我们 It's like they can see into our souls.
我懂 I know.
也许我们就是"没新意的累赘 Maybe we are "an uninspired placeholder until
苦苦挖掘笑点" something actually funny comes along."
你都背下来了 You've started memorising them?
只背下来非常差的那些 Only the really, really bad ones.
我们为什么要这么做 Why did we do this?
为什么不呆在家里 Why didn't we just stay at home?
好吧 那个 我们该去编剧室了 Right. Well, we should get to the writers' room.
好 走吧 Absolutely. Let's do it.
这些评论最好别给别人讲 Probably best not telling anyone else about the reviews.
对 因为只有我们会用电脑上网 Right, because we're the only ones with the magic box.
看来这家伙把你安排到零食摊工作了 Oooh! I see this guy's got you working the concessions stand.
她很棒的 只是别叫她给你找零钱 She's great. Just don't ask her to make change.
给你 Here you go.
谢谢 Thanks.
孩子们 激动人心的一晚哦 Hi, kids. Big night. Very exciting!
你好啊 Hello, you!
要爆米花吗 Popcorn?
当然了 Absolutely.
加黄油吗 Butter?
好的 Sure.
[就是那只戒指] That's the ring.
给你 Here you go.
好吃 我在报纸上看到你名字 Yum. So, I saw your name in the paper today.
拯救蜜蜂行动 For that big "save the bees" thing?
这很重要 Oh, it's so important.
过去的五年中 In the last five years the worldwide
世界上的蜜蜂数量大幅减少 honeybee population has just been decimated.
[我想操你]
人们也没有意识到这些蜜蜂 And people don't realise how essential they are
给水果蔬菜授粉有多重要 for pollinating our fruits and vegetables.
现在有一半的蜂巢都没了 And now 50 percent of the hives are gone.
-这叫做蜂巢衰竭症候群 -停下来 - It's called "colony collapse disorder." - Stop it!
但愿我们能让它停下来 Well, hopefully we can.
但愿吧 Yes.
我们的大明星来了 Our star has arrived.
马特 来点爆米花吗 Hello Matt. Popcorn?
好 对了 多谢你们办这个庆祝会 Sure. And by the way, thanks so much, you guys, for doing this.
很酷 Very cool.
那当然 怎么能不用心啊 Are you kidding? How could I not? Come on,
马特·勒布朗自《老友记》后首接新剧 Matt Leblanc's first show since Friends?
[实际上还拍过一部Joey]
好吧 Ok...
快来看看我的新装配 Hey, come and see my new set-up.
跟你们说 这很了不得 Just so you know, this is huge.
他还从没在家放过剧呢 He's never screened a show at his house before.
他对这个剧很有信心啊 That's how much he believes in this.
也许咱们还是降低一下期望的好 Maybe we should all... lower our expectations a bit.
你看那些评论了吗 I mean, have you read the reviews?
得了吧 谁关心电视剧评论啊 Oh, please! No one cares about TV reviews.
播出的大部分破玩意他们都讨厌 They hated most of the crap we've got
大家还不是一样看 on the air and people still watch it.
希望这部破玩意也是吧 Oh to be that crap.
开始了 过来坐吧 Curtain going up. Grab a seat.
人生有时春风得意 'sometimes you score
有时冰心透顶 and sometimes life just pucks!
马特·勒布朗携爆笑《冰球小子》首集归来 'Matt Leblanc returns in the hilarious premiere of Pucks!
马上播出 Next.'
我要找本书 I need a book.
还能再宽泛点吗 Er, can you be less specific?!
我不清楚 找本有字的就行 I don't know, I'm looking for something with pages...
好吧 我不是要找书 Ok, fine, I don't need a book.
我也看书的好吗 'hey, I read books.'
体育杂志的泳装专刊 'you do realise that the swimsuit issue of a
不算书 你知道吧 sports magazine doesn't count as a book?'
怎么 什么是书也由你做主啊 'oh, so now you get to decide what's a book?
是这样 我打你电话来着 'Anyway, I've called you.'
-我知道 -我给你留了三条留言 - I know. - I left you three messages.'
四条 'Four.'
真的 四条吗 'Really? Four?'
对 我四条都没回 咱们扯平了 'Yeah, and I didn't call you back four times. We're even.'
你真过分 'You're so mean.'
我是马特 It's Matt.
话可得说清楚了 'No, just trying to be clear.'
我知道 I know.
我不会跟一个以冰球 'I'm not going out with a guy who's life
为人生中心的人约会的 centres around a hockey puck.'
要是你愿意和我多相处一会 Well, maybe if you spent a little time with me,
你会发现我内涵深着呢 可不止冰球 you'd see there's more to me than just my puck.
跟我出去约会一次吧 我保证 'Come on, go out with me once, I promise,
我提都不会提冰球的 my puck won't even come up.'
是吗 我感觉你肯定会 'Really? Because it seems like it's
经常冰球这冰球那 probably a puck that comes up a lot.'
都说了我是有内涵的 不止冰球这点事 'I'm telling you there's more to me than just my puck.'
但是到头来 And yet, at the end of the day, I think your
你最关心的还是冰球 puck is pretty much what you're all about.
二位行行好吧 要是我这会死了 You do realise that if I die right now,
这就是我听到的最后一段对话诶 this is the last conversation I'll ever hear.
有多棒 How great was that?
超级棒 说实话 现在再看一遍都行 Really great! seriously, I'm ready to watch it again!
我有没有说我多爱这个剧 Have I mentioned how much I love this show?
说了 Yeah!
各位 楼上有咖啡和甜点 Everybody, there's coffee and dessert upstairs.
好极了 Oh great, that sounds good.
-你裤子上有黄油 -什么 靠 - Oh, you've got some butter on your pants. - What? Oh shit!
没错 是黄油 Yup, that's butter.
这会有面包就好了 是吧 Where's bread when you need it?
好吧 好吧 Ok. Ok.
我知道你还在生我气 Listen, I know you're still pissed at me and everything,
不过你肯定不会相信刚刚发生了什么 but you will not believe what just happened.
我没有还在生气 I'm not still pissed.
-没有吗 -没有 - No? - No.
因为那就意味着我总有一天会不生气 Cos that implies there'll come a time when I'm not pissed.
我会一直生你的气 I will always be pissed.
对你 我持续生气中 With you, I am in a constant state of pissed.
-好了 好了 但是 -没有但是 - Yeah, yeah, ok, but... - No. No but.
-但是 -说了没有但是 - But... - No! no but.
不管你要说什么 Whatever you've got to say,
我都不想听 I don't want to hear it.
咱们绝交了 I'm not your friend.
你想谈剧 可以 You want to talk about the show, fine.
但是工作以外的事 任何事 But anything beyond work... anything...
这也算是和工作有关的 Well, this is kind of work-related.
是吗 Is it?
这事是看剧的时候发生的 I was watching the show when it happened?
我们做到啦 不可思议 太不可思议了 We totally did it. Unbelievable. Unbelievable.
完全出乎 It's, like, beyond what I ever...
她来啦 Hey, there she is! woo-hoo!
-没事吧 -没事 - Are you all right? - I'm fine.
算是买个教训了 That'll teach me to walk into a room!
不好意思 大家是因为收视率太兴奋了 Sorry, everyone's just very excited about the ratings.
真的 很好吗 Really? We did well?
5.6是有电视机的家庭观看节目的收视率\n 13是当晚看电视的家庭观看节目的收视率
家庭收视率是5.6/13 We got a 5.6 with a 13 share
18-33岁人群收视率是3.8 And a 3.8 in the 18-33 demo.
哇 Wow!
我完全不知道这小伙子刚才说了什么 I have no idea what this boy just said.
知道很好就行了 They're good.
-真的吗 -简直超好 - Are you serious? - Really good.
波士顿先驱报的麦伦·布鲁姆 Yeah. Take that,
这回知道厉害了吧 Myron Blum of the Boston Herald,
什么"我不知道这剧拍给谁看" with your, "i don't know who this show is for."
除了你这傻冒之外 人人都看 It's for everyone but you, cockface!
不是说不看那些评论吗 I thought you said you didn't read them.
-恭喜各位啦 -对 干得好 - So, congratulations, everyone. - Yeah, nicely done.
嘿 Hey.
怎么样 How about that?
那他们是不是能让我们早点下班 Does this mean they'll let us go home early?
"他们"指谁啊 是我们吧 Who's "they"? We're "they".
那 So...?
不行 No.
好了 大家各就各位 谢谢 Ok, people, back to work. Thank you.
好的 稍后见 天呐 Right. I'll see you later. Jesus!
今晚排名第一的新节目 Number one new show of the night.
修蒙肯定要嫉妒死了 This is going to kill Schwimmer.
[老友记中Ross 扮演者]
收视5.6 占有率13% 5.6 with a 13 share!
-演示版3.8分 -再说一遍 And a 3.8 in the demo! say it again!
3.8分 3.8. Oooh!
平均收看长度为98% 98% retention.
嗨 他在里面吗 Hi. Is he in?
-我知道 -这简直 - I know. - I mean...
-太疯狂了 -昨晚收看我们剧的观众数量 - It's insane. - You realise more people saw our show last night
比之前《莱曼校长和孩子们》 than probably every episode
每集的观众加起来的总和还多 of Lyman's Boys put together?
-不是吧 -真的 - Seriously? - Yeah.
美国就这特点 人多 You've got to say this about Americans. There's a lot of them.
你干嘛 What are you doing?
前天我在一个饼上做了记号 I marked one two days ago. I just
我就想看看他们多久换一批 want to see how long it sits here.
那么 你失望吗 So, disappointed?
失望什么 At what?
你肯定不希望这样一炮打响吧 I can't imagine a big hit was what you were wishing for.
你猜错了 It's not true.
-是吗 -就是 - Right! - It's not.
还在这里 It's still here!
你确定 就没有任何一点点想法 You're telling me there wasn't a part of you hoping
希望这个剧泡汤 然后我们就可以 This whole thing would bomb and we
-赶紧回家 -你大错特错了 - could go home? - How wrong you are.
你已经说的很清楚了 回到英国 Look, you have made it very clear that when we get home
我们就离婚 不再有关系 We're finished, we're nothing.
现在至少我们还能这样交流 Right now, at least we have this.
我还不想失去这个 Why would I wish for that to go away?
开始排练 Rehearsal's up!
我能问你点事情吗 Hey. Can I ask you something?
你能回避一下吗 Er, could you give us a sec?
怎么了 What's up?
这幕戏里 我知道他们在撒谎对吧 In this scene, I know the guys are lying to me, right?
对 Right.
但你要装作不知道的样子 But you don't want to give too much
之后再吓他们一跳 away so you can surprise them later.
我也是这么想的 对了 还有 That's what I thought. Oh, and um, also,
昨晚看首映的时候 Jamie lapidus gave me a hand-job
杰米·拉皮多斯给我手淫了 during the show last night.
我必须告诉你 I had to tell you.
哦对啊 你搞别人老婆这种事 Oh, yeah, who better to share the news with
必须得告诉我是吧 you had sex with someone else's wife?!
其实也就是手淫一下 Well, first of all, just a hand-job.
可她老公就坐你们前面三排 With her husband three seats away!
我知道 I know!
-你还挺自豪啊 -没有 - My god, you're proud of this?! - No.
但我必须说出来 一边看你自己演的戏 But I gotta say, getting jerked-off
一边有人帮你打炮 While you're watching yourself on TV?
是演员一辈子的梦想啊 Actors work their whole lives for that.
-还有谁知道这件事 -没了 - Who else knows about this? - Nobody.
很好 别再说出去了 Good. Keep it that way.
默克·拉皮多斯最不希望在这部戏里看到的 The last thing our little show needs
就是你操他老婆 is for Merc Lapidus to find out that you are fucking his wife.
-再说一遍 我没操她 -对他来说 - Again, not fucking. - I'm not sure he'll
你做的事和操她没区别 appreciate the bloody distinction!
你脑子坏了啊 她是你老板的老婆 What's the matter with you? That woman is married to your boss!
既然说到这个 我倒要问问 And while we're on the subject, what is it with you
你怎么这么爱搞别人老婆 心理变态啊 And other people's wives?! it's pathological!
地球上其他那些没男人的女性 Are there no other women in the world who aren't the spouses
你一个都不认识吗 of people you know?! It...
干吗 What?
这种对话久违了 I've missed this.
这件比那件好点 Mm, this one better than this one.
你还记得那件很酷的普拉达外套么 You know that cool prada jacket that you
你说我的角色肯定不会穿的那件 said my character would never wear?
我想到有一个地方可以用到它 I figured out where it would work.
-哪里 -我家 - Where? - My house.
-安妮 你能帮我拿来吗 -好 - Annie, could you grab that for me? - Ok.
挺好 除了你谁还会顺手牵羊啊 Well, good, because who's more deserving of free clothes than you?
你也能拿啊 你想要什么 You can take stuff. What do you want?
我可以像正常人一样去商店买东西 Or I could go to a shop, like a normal person.
免费东西送你都不要 Yeah, someone who turns down free shit
可算不得正常人 - not a normal person.
-呃 肖恩生气的这件事 -怎么 - So, listen, this thing with sean being pissed off. - Yeah?
你觉得他还要生多久的气 How long do you think that's going to last?
没法跟他聊天让我感觉很奇怪 It's just weird not being able to talk to him about stuff.
是啊 真是委屈你了 Yes, this must be very hard for you!
没错 It is.
太好了 谢谢 Ah, that's great, thanks.
还有个帽子 There was a hat?
行 Sure.
我没说他是不该生气 我懂的 Look, I'm not saying he doesn't have a right to be mad, I get it,
但发火也总有个头吧 说句"好吧算了" But at what point is it, like, "all right, already"?
-"好吧算了" -你知道我的意思 - "All right, already"?! - You know what I mean.
他发誓说绝对不会原谅我的 但我 He swears he'll never get over it, but I just...
只能选择不信 我没办法 I have to believe it's not true. I just, I have to.
我明白了 Yeah. I hear you.
我也没法怪他 I certainly can't blame him.
回头看看我做的事情 就像是看 When I look back at what I did, it's like I'm looking at this
另一个完全跟我没关系的人 whole other person doing these inexplicable things
在跟世界上我最讨厌的家伙 with the absolutely last person on god's earth
做了些完全解释不通的事情 I'd ever want to do them with.
不客气 You're welcome.
事已至此 And now here we are,
我唯一在乎的人也要离我远去了 And I may have lost the only thing I ever actually cared about.
如果有什么我能帮到你的话 Well, if there's anything I can do...
你就别喷那傻逼古龙水了 You could stop wearing that fucking cologne!
帽子怎么还没来 How we doing on the hat?
你们看到了没 Hey, did you guys see this?
我们剧的收视率上升了 Our ratings went up in the nationals.
你知道自己在看什么吗 Do you have any idea what you're looking at?
不知道 No.
好险 我居然差一点点 I can't believe I came this close
-就没接这部剧 -真的? - to not taking this show. - Really?
对 我今年有两部戏的邀约 Yeah. I got two offers this year.
这部戏 还有人请我演出一部 This one, and they wanted me for the kid in that
狗说话的戏里的小孩 talking dog show.
还有狗说人话的剧 There's a talking dog show?
ABC电视台的剧 下周首播 Over at ABC. It starts next week.
-其实这剧和我们是对手 -这戏有什么好 - Actually it's opposite us. - Any good?
哥们 狗会说人话啊 Dude, it's a talking dog show.
-是啊 哥们 -我本不知该选哪个 - Yeah, dude! - So, like, I wasn't sure which one to pick.
我老婆一直劝我 My wife was really pushing me to
-选另一部 -你老婆 - take the other one. - Er, your wife?
还不是正式的 Well, not officially, yet.
得等我离婚手续办下来再说 Have to wait till my divorce comes through.
你这都第二次结婚了? This would be your second marriage?
理论上是这样 第一次做不得真 Technically. I don't even count the first one.
根本他妈一团糟 It was just a big fucking mess.
-我们很小就结婚了 -娘胎里就结婚了 - We got married really young. - I assume as embryos.
我今年27 I'm 27.
-不是吧 -凯文29 斯透克都快31了 - You're not! - Kevin's 29. Stoke's going to be 31.
我们办的这是什么怪中学 Very strange high school we're running!
欢乐合唱团那帮人估计都50岁了 Hey, the kids on Glee are, like, in their fifties.
打扰了 Excuse me.
-要开拍了吗 -对 不过他们要你们 - Are we close to shooting? - Yeah, but they need you guys
到更衣室的布景去一下 over in the locker room set.
又要走路 Oh, I've got to walk.
太讨厌了 It's awful!
祝你生日快乐 Happy birthday to you
祝你生日快乐 肖恩 Happy birthday, dear Sean
祝你生日快乐 Happy birthday to you.
是你安排的吗 Did you do this?
-不是的 -马特的主意 - Actually, no. - It's from Matt.
好吧 Ok.
-恭喜 -谢谢 - Congrats. - Thank you.
-生日快乐 -哇哦 - Happy birthday. - Oh wow!
恭喜了 Ah. Congratulations.
-大寿星啊 -谢了伙计 - Hey, birthday boy. - All right, man.
好的 切蛋糕了 Nice one. Right, come on. Dig in.
肖恩和贝佛利的办公室 'Sean and Beverly's office.'
卡罗·兰斯在二号线上 Carol Rance on two!
谢谢 Thank you.
-嗨 卡罗 -请稍等 卡罗马上回来 - Hi, -Carol. - Hold for Carol, please.'
温迪 来一下 Wendy, could you come here, please?
来了 Yeah.
可以的话 要是对方不在电话机旁 Would it be possible, when the person's not actually on the line,
你能不能跟我说一声 这样我就不用 You could alert me to that fact so that I don't...
-喂 -她来了 - Hi, you!' - There she is.
卡罗 什么事 Hi, Carol. What's up?
肖恩过生日 我陪你出去转转吧 I'm taking you out for Sean's birthday.
你不该孤零零的 You should not be alone.
真贴心 默克又放你鸽子了 Aw, that's sweet. Merc cancel again?
他忘记他孩子学校还有事 He forgot he had a thing at his kid's school.
有时候我就奇怪 我刮腿毛都是为了什么 Sometimes I wonder why I even shave my legs.
肖恩喜欢那块表吗 So, how did Sean like the watch?'
我不想当面送给他 他会尴尬的 I didn't want to put him on the spot when I gave it to him,
所以我请人放在他车上 So I had a PA put it in his car.
我就这样了 怎么着吧 Yeah, so what?!
看看你 真是吸引眼球啊 Hey, look at you. Very impressive.
拜托 我吃了你他妈两块蛋糕 Please. I had two pieces of your fucking birthday cake!
大概得跑到克利夫兰才能减下来 I need to run to, like, Cleveland.
尽情嘲笑我这个贪吃鬼吧 Say what you want about bulimia...
请别说下去了 Please don't finish that sentence.
我保证 只要我们这剧不被砍 I promise, once we're sure we're not getting cancelled,
我就继续增加体重 I'll start packing on the pounds.
-不过在那之前 -我们离被砍远着呢 - Till then... - We're doing a little better than not
你看过今天数据 getting cancelled. You saw those numbers today.
我知道 但是这个不一定 No, I know. Still.
什么 收视率那么... What? The ratings were...
没错 数据不错 但大家还只是在尝鲜 No, they were great, but that's just people sampling it.
咱们还是等到下周再看看 Let's wait till next week and see.
你还真是乐天派 Well, you're a big ball of positivity.
我参演过FOX 电视台的一部戏 Hey, I once did this FOX show about
关于三个合住女孩的故事 these three girls living together.
我还是里面奶子最小的 I was the one with the smaller tits.
创意不错 Interesting concept.
那一季 我们的首播数据 We had the highest number of any
是所有新剧里面最高的 new series premiering that season.
第二周 稍微差点 第三周 天啊 Week two, not so much. Week three, ooh.
数据一直下降 They kept dropping and dropping.
第六集就被砍了 They pulled the plug after six.
现在如果不能一次订九集 Now I won't even decorate my dressing room
我都懒得装饰我的化妆间 until we're picked up for the back nine.
开局强势并不意味着 Just because you start out strong doesn't mean that...
-怎么 -你这是干什么 - What? - What are you doing?
-我只是说说 -今天是我生日 - I'm just saying. - It's my birthday.
我操 我太操蛋了 不会有事的 Oh, shit! I am an asshole! It's all good.
收视率绝对不会下降的 The ratings will never come down!
我本以为你的演技会比这个强点 I thought you were a better actress than that.
显然你还没看过对我这部戏的评论 Obviously you haven't read my reviews for this show.
生日你打算做点什么 So what are you doing for the birthday?
生日也没什么大不了的 Oh, birthdays are no big deal.
-什么都不做 -没事 我还有剧本要看 - So nothing? - I'm fine, I've got some scripts to look over and...
少来 我们好好庆祝下 Fuck that! we're going to celebrate.
心意我领了 但我 Well, I appreciate it, but I really...
这算是 And that was...?
生日礼物 Birthday present?
就礼物而言 这算是精心准备的了 Well, as gifts go, it was very thoughtful.
还有大份的呢 It also comes in large.
我怎么觉得有义务问一句 I don't know why I feel obliged to
你男朋友他 ask this, but your boyfriend...?
-什么男朋友 -你说你有男友 - What boyfriend? - You told me you had a boyfriend.
那看来我演技还不错 Oh. Maybe I am a good actress.