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翻譯： NANA TanKnoX 碧落 黑里黑外 Goldencui
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后期制作: loved 校對: NANA 監制: NANA
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前情提要
知道我的幻想是什么嗎 You know what my fantasy is?
我明早醒來 I wake up tomorrow,
我的電視臺就播上了你們的劇 and I've got your show on my network.
什么 讓我們去洛杉磯 What, us come to LA?
我們討論一下演職人員吧 Let's talk about casting.
朱利安已經答應我們的邀請 Well, we already have Julian committed
將再次出演萊曼這個角色 to recreate the role of Lyman.
拉到了馬特·勒布朗入伙 We got Matt LeBlanc!
好耶 Yeah!
你們想讓我來演那個老胖子的角色 謝了 You want me for the old fat guy's part? Thanks!
-我們沒想讓你演 -再說一次 謝了 We don't want you. Again, thanks!
馬特跟我說了關于他角色的改動 Matt's been telling me about the changes for his character.
我很喜歡他扮演教練 I love that he's a coach.
我們可以命名為《冰球小子》 We can call it pucks!
我有沒有說過我討厭這部戲 Did I mention I hate this show?
有這個印象 I believe it's come up.
你比她可迷人多了 You're much more attractive than she is.
真的 她一看就是整過容的 You are. She's all plastic.
那對胸啊 Those boobs...
惡心 Yuk.
你是一位非常 非常有才華的編劇 You are a brilliant, brilliant writer.
你知道這是為什么 You know what this is about!
莫寧嗎 天吶 Morning? Oh, my god!
我對她一點感覺都沒有 Look, I have no interest in her at all!
貝貝 停車 你走錯邊了 Bev, stop! you're on the wrong side!
不 肖恩 走錯的是你 No, Sean, you're on the wrong side!
我不是那個意思 That's not what I meant!
你是不是插了我老婆 Did you shag my wife?
完全是她挑起的 She totally started it, ok. She was
她逆向行車 driving on the wrong side of the street.
所以你就操她了 So you fucked her?!
和他搞過的這個念頭 從生理上讓我反感 The thought that I was with him physically disgusts me.
-我真的感到反胃 讓我想吐 -得了吧 - I'm actually nauseated, it makes me want to vomit. - All right!
我不是想嚇唬誰 但是我覺得 Not to get too melodramatic, but I think...
你已經傷透了我的心 You've broken my heart.
我們大受歡迎 'We're a hit!'
什么 What?
試映觀眾們很喜歡《冰球小子》 The test audiences loved pucks!
你什么意思 What are you saying?
我的意思是把行李都放回去吧 I'm saying unpack those bloody bags,
你們還有電視劇要拍呢 you've got some telly to make!
戲里戲外
四個月后
拜托 怎么了 C'mon, what's going on?
沒事 我好著呢 Nothing, I'm fine.
聽著 Hey, listen,
我不僅僅是你的教練 我也是你的朋友 I'm not just your coach, I'm also your friend.
他兩個爹要分開了 His dads are getting separated.
兩個同性戀爹 The gay dads?
對 不是兩個異性戀爹 Right! Not his two straight dads.
好吧 Ok...
一個爹跟一個女的搞上了 One of my dads had an affair with a
現在人家說自己是雙性戀 woman and now he's saying he's bi.
而另一個爹呢 說他這是中年危機罷了 But my other dad says it's just a mid-life crisis.
然后呢 他搞上的這個女的 Oh, and the woman he had the affair with is the
是貢獻了卵子并且生了我的代孕母親 surrogate whose egg they used to make... me.
有什么想法嗎 教練 Thoughts, coach?
? Cut!
今天干得不錯 大家 Nice work today, everyone.
檢查鏡頭 Check the gate.
不壞嘛 Not bad.
-我覺得進行的不錯 -新來的男孩挺棒的 - I think that worked. - The new boys are pretty good.
-什么 -發型那樣的那個 - What? - The one with the hair.
斯透克 Stoke.
斯透克 什么樣的家長給孩子取名叫斯透克 Stoke! What kind of a parent names their child Stoke?
對啊 I know.
這樣一搞 這孩子最好是長得帥 It's like saying you'd better be attractive,
否則這輩子就在嘲諷中過去了 or it's all going to be ironic from here on in.
作為一名演員 他倒長得還不錯 Well, as an actor, he's lucky he's cute.
等等 像這樣 天 你牙可真多 Wait. Go like this... god, you've got a lot of teeth.
就那兒 Right there.
-什么 -有個東西 - What? - You've got a thing.
虞美人籽 估計是早上吃的百吉餅里的 Hmm, poppy seed. Must be from my bagel this morning.
那它在那卡了一天了 你怎么不告訴我 So that's been there all day, why didn't you tell me?!
我告訴你了啊 I just told you.
現在才說 所有人都看見了 Yeah, now, after everyone's already seen it!
行 那又塞回去 Ok, put it back!
-晚安 -晚安 - Night. - Night.
-今天干得不錯 -謝謝 - Good job today. - Thank you.
干得不錯 Yeah, nice work.
-內褲不錯 -謝謝 - Nice underpants. - Thanks.
你們喝咖啡嗎 Hey, do you guys ever drink coffee?
有家公司給我送了十多臺咖啡機 Cos this company sent me, like, a dozen free coffee makers.
為什么 Why?
不知道 誰管呢 I don't know. Who cares?
反正免費 你要一臺嗎 They're free, you want one?
-我不用了 謝謝 -謝謝你 - Oh, I'm all right. No thanks. - Thank you.
-今天還不錯吧 -是滴 - So today went well? - Absolutely.
你們還開心吧 You guys are happy?
-相當地 -晚安 - Very. - Night.
晚安 Night.
-我要臺咖啡機吧 -我問你了嗎 - I'll take a coffee maker. - Did I ask you?
你今晚打算怎么過 What are you thinking about for tonight?
我想我得再把第三幕過一遍 I thought I'd have another go at that third scene.
如果你想跟我過一遍 我就在家 Well, if you want to run it by me, I'll be home.
剔牙 Flossing.
行 晚安了 Right, well, have a nice night.
你也是 明天見 You too. See you tomorrow.
嘿 Hey!
你還好吧 You all right?
我很好 I'm great.
看著可不怎么好 Don't look great.
默克和我去買戒指了 Merc and I went ring shopping.
我的天吶 Oh my god!
給他老婆買 For his wife.
他帶你去給他老婆買戒指 He took you ring shopping for his wife?!
他再殘忍也不能這么過分吧 That sounds cruel, even for him.
是他們的紀念日 他也知道自己品位糟糕 It's their anniversary, and he knows he has terrible taste,
所以他讓我陪他去買點漂亮的東西 So he wanted me along to help him buy something pretty.
親 Oh, honey...
他對她真是太好了 He's so good to her.
這個嘛 Well...
我看上了一個華美無比的戒指 I found this really gorgeous ring.
我就一直在想 她是個瞎子 And all the time I'm thinking, "the woman is blind!
新戒指給我 隨便拿個舊戒指給她就好了 "buy me a fucking ring and give her one of her old ones!
她又看不出來 how will she know?!"
然后我又為我有這種想法感到愧疚 And then I feel guilty for thinking that, like,
我實在太壞了 "oh, I am this terrible person."
搞錯沒 你要跟我計較這個嗎 Really? We're gonna pull at that thread?
-抱歉 -該道歉的是我 - Sorry. - No, I'm sorry.
今晚你才是主角 Tonight's supposed to be about you.
好了 好了 OK, OK.
我回過神了 I'm here now.
我很好 來慶祝吧 I'm great! let's celebrate.
慶祝《冰球小子》 Here is to Pucks!
明晚大首播 Big premiere tomorrow night.
我待會還要看劇本呢 I've got to read a script later.
想讓劇本變得好笑嗎 Want to make it hilarious?
這是什么 Ooh, what's this?
是給肖恩的 It's for Sean...
你又在想全世界只有你沒有禮物收 And now you're thinking everyone's getting presents but you.
我又沒有說出來 I didn't say it out loud.
今天是他生日 頭一回不在一起過 It's his birthday. Our first one apart.
所以 應該挺有趣 So, that'll be fun!
你給他買了什么 Aah. What d'you get him?
手表 他一直想要的百瑞靈的古董手表 A watch. It's a vintage Breitling he's always wanted.
他肯定會喜歡的 So he'll love that.
也許他會覺得這份禮太大了 Or, he'll think it's way over the top and
顯得我很絕望 很依賴他似的 I'll come off as desperate and needy.
有可能 Or that.
我討厭這樣 他可是我老公啊 I hate this. This is my husband!
而現在他就像是個 Now it's like he's some boy
還不知道會不會喜歡我的男孩子 who may or may not still like me.
去他媽的 Oh, fuck it!
從個人經驗來看 Speaking from my own relationships,
偶爾有些"依賴"并不是壞事 a little "needy" isn't always a bad thing.
-真的嗎 -即使你可能 - Really? - I mean even though you might
顯得有些可悲 come off as kind of pathetic,
從更深的層面看 on a deeper level,
通過批判你 能讓他覺得自己很偉岸 by being able to judge you, it allows him to feel empowered,
很多男人需要這個 所以他會更愛你 and a lot of men need that. So, it makes them love you more.
所以基本上來說 So basically, if I'm ever feeling like
如果我感覺自己是世界上最瘋狂的人 the craziest person on the planet,
跟你吃個飯就好了 I should just have dinner with you.
我正是為此而來 That's what I'm here for.
還沒開播呢 他們想整死咱們啊 We're not even on the air yet and they're fucking killing us!
沒一句好的 There's not one good one.
那就別看了 So stop reading them.
-天啊 -怎么 - Jesus! - What?
《紐約郵報》的文章 The New York Post...
《冰球小子》 難看到死 "Pucks! sucks!"
瞧這名取的 Well, we just handed him that one.
這是標題嗎 《冰球小子》難看到死 What, that's the headline? "Pucks! Sucks!"?
對 然后不停地說我們很蠢 Right. Then he goes on to say we're not clever.
別看了 別折磨自己了 Please. Stop. Do not do this to yourself.
《娛樂周報》 勒布朗參演"樂不了" Entertainment Weekly - "LeBlanc shoots a le blank."
至少還有人在標題上下了點功夫 Well, at least someone gave it some thought.
"真不敢想象 "It's hard to imagine how this show
這劇居然在英國撐了四季" lasted four seasons in the UK."
因為英國版的不是這樣的 蠢貨 Because it wasn't this show, arsehole!
你們找我嗎 Did you want me?
什么 What?
沒有 No.
好吧 OK.
等等 看這個 《赫芬頓郵報》 Oh wait, wait, here we go. Huffington Post.
"我本已做好準備 "I was totally prepared
要討厭今晚的新喜劇《冰球小子》 to hate tonight's new comedy Pucks!
還好 我做足了準備" "well the good news is, I was prepared."
他們為什么都不喜歡我們 Why do they hate us?
因為他們是白癡 Because they're idiots!
沒叫你 No!
怎么這么大怨氣 不就是個電視劇嗎 So much rage. Why? It's just a little TV show.
一個劇而已 我們又沒有痛扁埃爾默 It's not like we're punching Elmo, it's just a show!
[兒童節目《芝麻街》角色]
-謝謝 -輕松又幽默 - Thank you! - It's light, it's funny.
必須的 Absolutely.
雖然不是天才之作 I mean, it's not brilliant.
但也不是"令人勞神費力的90年代老套喜劇 But is it "an exhausting rehash of '90s sitcom cliches
馬特·勒布朗江郎才盡還用力過猛" "with Matt LeBlanc digging into his old bag of tricks and coming up short"?
你為什么要念這條 Why d'you have to read that one?
他們好像看透了我們 It's like they can see into our souls.
我懂 I know.
也許我們就是"沒新意的累贅 Maybe we are "an uninspired placeholder until
苦苦挖掘笑點" something actually funny comes along."
你都背下來了 You've started memorising them?
只背下來非常差的那些 Only the really, really bad ones.
我們為什么要這么做 Why did we do this?
為什么不呆在家里 Why didn't we just stay at home?
好吧 那個 我們該去編劇室了 Right. Well, we should get to the writers' room.
好 走吧 Absolutely. Let's do it.
這些評論最好別給別人講 Probably best not telling anyone else about the reviews.
對 因為只有我們會用電腦上網 Right, because we're the only ones with the magic box.
看來這家伙把你安排到零食攤工作了 Oooh! I see this guy's got you working the concessions stand.
她很棒的 只是別叫她給你找零錢 She's great. Just don't ask her to make change.
給你 Here you go.
謝謝 Thanks.
孩子們 激動人心的一晚哦 Hi, kids. Big night. Very exciting!
你好啊 Hello, you!
要爆米花嗎 Popcorn?
當然了 Absolutely.
加黃油嗎 Butter?
好的 Sure.
[就是那只戒指] That's the ring.
給你 Here you go.
好吃 我在報紙上看到你名字 Yum. So, I saw your name in the paper today.
拯救蜜蜂行動 For that big "save the bees" thing?
這很重要 Oh, it's so important.
過去的五年中 In the last five years the worldwide
世界上的蜜蜂數量大幅減少 honeybee population has just been decimated.
[我想操你]
人們也沒有意識到這些蜜蜂 And people don't realise how essential they are
給水果蔬菜授粉有多重要 for pollinating our fruits and vegetables.
現在有一半的蜂巢都沒了 And now 50 percent of the hives are gone.
-這叫做蜂巢衰竭癥候群 -停下來 - It's called "colony collapse disorder." - Stop it!
但愿我們能讓它停下來 Well, hopefully we can.
但愿吧 Yes.
我們的大明星來了 Our star has arrived.
馬特 來點爆米花嗎 Hello Matt. Popcorn?
好 對了 多謝你們辦這個慶祝會 Sure. And by the way, thanks so much, you guys, for doing this.
很酷 Very cool.
那當然 怎么能不用心啊 Are you kidding? How could I not? Come on,
馬特·勒布朗自《老友記》后首接新劇 Matt Leblanc's first show since Friends?
[實際上還拍過一部Joey]
好吧 Ok...
快來看看我的新裝配 Hey, come and see my new set-up.
跟你們說 這很了不得 Just so you know, this is huge.
他還從沒在家放過劇呢 He's never screened a show at his house before.
他對這個劇很有信心啊 That's how much he believes in this.
也許咱們還是降低一下期望的好 Maybe we should all... lower our expectations a bit.
你看那些評論了嗎 I mean, have you read the reviews?
得了吧 誰關心電視劇評論啊 Oh, please! No one cares about TV reviews.
播出的大部分破玩意他們都討厭 They hated most of the crap we've got
大家還不是一樣看 on the air and people still watch it.
希望這部破玩意也是吧 Oh to be that crap.
開始了 過來坐吧 Curtain going up. Grab a seat.
人生有時春風得意 'sometimes you score
有時冰心透頂 and sometimes life just pucks!
馬特·勒布朗攜爆笑《冰球小子》首集歸來 'Matt Leblanc returns in the hilarious premiere of Pucks!
馬上播出 Next.'
我要找本書 I need a book.
還能再寬泛點嗎 Er, can you be less specific?!
我不清楚 找本有字的就行 I don't know, I'm looking for something with pages...
好吧 我不是要找書 Ok, fine, I don't need a book.
我也看書的好嗎 'hey, I read books.'
體育雜志的泳裝專刊 'you do realise that the swimsuit issue of a
不算書 你知道吧 sports magazine doesn't count as a book?'
怎么 什么是書也由你做主啊 'oh, so now you get to decide what's a book?
是這樣 我打你電話來著 'Anyway, I've called you.'
-我知道 -我給你留了三條留言 - I know. - I left you three messages.'
四條 'Four.'
真的 四條嗎 'Really? Four?'
對 我四條都沒回 咱們扯平了 'Yeah, and I didn't call you back four times. We're even.'
你真過分 'You're so mean.'
我是馬特 It's Matt.
話可得說清楚了 'No, just trying to be clear.'
我知道 I know.
我不會跟一個以冰球 'I'm not going out with a guy who's life
為人生中心的人約會的 centres around a hockey puck.'
要是你愿意和我多相處一會 Well, maybe if you spent a little time with me,
你會發現我內涵深著呢 可不止冰球 you'd see there's more to me than just my puck.
跟我出去約會一次吧 我保證 'Come on, go out with me once, I promise,
我提都不會提冰球的 my puck won't even come up.'
是嗎 我感覺你肯定會 'Really? Because it seems like it's
經常冰球這冰球那 probably a puck that comes up a lot.'
都說了我是有內涵的 不止冰球這點事 'I'm telling you there's more to me than just my puck.'
但是到頭來 And yet, at the end of the day, I think your
你最關心的還是冰球 puck is pretty much what you're all about.
二位行行好吧 要是我這會死了 You do realise that if I die right now,
這就是我聽到的最后一段對話誒 this is the last conversation I'll ever hear.
有多棒 How great was that?
超級棒 說實話 現在再看一遍都行 Really great! seriously, I'm ready to watch it again!
我有沒有說我多愛這個劇 Have I mentioned how much I love this show?
說了 Yeah!
各位 樓上有咖啡和甜點 Everybody, there's coffee and dessert upstairs.
好極了 Oh great, that sounds good.
-你褲子上有黃油 -什么 靠 - Oh, you've got some butter on your pants. - What? Oh shit!
沒錯 是黃油 Yup, that's butter.
這會有面包就好了 是吧 Where's bread when you need it?
好吧 好吧 Ok. Ok.
我知道你還在生我氣 Listen, I know you're still pissed at me and everything,
不過你肯定不會相信剛剛發生了什么 but you will not believe what just happened.
我沒有還在生氣 I'm not still pissed.
-沒有嗎 -沒有 - No? - No.
因為那就意味著我總有一天會不生氣 Cos that implies there'll come a time when I'm not pissed.
我會一直生你的氣 I will always be pissed.
對你 我持續生氣中 With you, I am in a constant state of pissed.
-好了 好了 但是 -沒有但是 - Yeah, yeah, ok, but... - No. No but.
-但是 -說了沒有但是 - But... - No! no but.
不管你要說什么 Whatever you've got to say,
我都不想聽 I don't want to hear it.
咱們絕交了 I'm not your friend.
你想談劇 可以 You want to talk about the show, fine.
但是工作以外的事 任何事 But anything beyond work... anything...
這也算是和工作有關的 Well, this is kind of work-related.
是嗎 Is it?
這事是看劇的時候發生的 I was watching the show when it happened?
我們做到啦 不可思議 太不可思議了 We totally did it. Unbelievable. Unbelievable.
完全出乎 It's, like, beyond what I ever...
她來啦 Hey, there she is! woo-hoo!
-沒事吧 -沒事 - Are you all right? - I'm fine.
算是買個教訓了 That'll teach me to walk into a room!
不好意思 大家是因為收視率太興奮了 Sorry, everyone's just very excited about the ratings.
真的 很好嗎 Really? We did well?
5.6是有電視機的家庭觀看節目的收視率\n 13是當晚看電視的家庭觀看節目的收視率
家庭收視率是5.6/13 We got a 5.6 with a 13 share
18-33歲人群收視率是3.8 And a 3.8 in the 18-33 demo.
哇 Wow!
我完全不知道這小伙子剛才說了什么 I have no idea what this boy just said.
知道很好就行了 They're good.
-真的嗎 -簡直超好 - Are you serious? - Really good.
波士頓先驅報的麥倫·布魯姆 Yeah. Take that,
這回知道厲害了吧 Myron Blum of the Boston Herald,
什么"我不知道這劇拍給誰看" with your, "i don't know who this show is for."
除了你這傻冒之外 人人都看 It's for everyone but you, cockface!
不是說不看那些評論嗎 I thought you said you didn't read them.
-恭喜各位啦 -對 干得好 - So, congratulations, everyone. - Yeah, nicely done.
嘿 Hey.
怎么樣 How about that?
那他們是不是能讓我們早點下班 Does this mean they'll let us go home early?
"他們"指誰啊 是我們吧 Who's "they"? We're "they".
那 So...?
不行 No.
好了 大家各就各位 謝謝 Ok, people, back to work. Thank you.
好的 稍后見 天吶 Right. I'll see you later. Jesus!
今晚排名第一的新節目 Number one new show of the night.
修蒙肯定要嫉妒死了 This is going to kill Schwimmer.
[老友記中Ross 扮演者]
收視5.6 占有率13% 5.6 with a 13 share!
-演示版3.8分 -再說一遍 And a 3.8 in the demo! say it again!
3.8分 3.8. Oooh!
平均收看長度為98% 98% retention.
嗨 他在里面嗎 Hi. Is he in?
-我知道 -這簡直 - I know. - I mean...
-太瘋狂了 -昨晚收看我們劇的觀眾數量 - It's insane. - You realise more people saw our show last night
比之前《萊曼校長和孩子們》 than probably every episode
每集的觀眾加起來的總和還多 of Lyman's Boys put together?
-不是吧 -真的 - Seriously? - Yeah.
美國就這特點 人多 You've got to say this about Americans. There's a lot of them.
你干嘛 What are you doing?
前天我在一個餅上做了記號 I marked one two days ago. I just
我就想看看他們多久換一批 want to see how long it sits here.
那么 你失望嗎 So, disappointed?
失望什么 At what?
你肯定不希望這樣一炮打響吧 I can't imagine a big hit was what you were wishing for.
你猜錯了 It's not true.
-是嗎 -就是 - Right! - It's not.
還在這里 It's still here!
你確定 就沒有任何一點點想法 You're telling me there wasn't a part of you hoping
希望這個劇泡湯 然后我們就可以 This whole thing would bomb and we
-趕緊回家 -你大錯特錯了 - could go home? - How wrong you are.
你已經說的很清楚了 回到英國 Look, you have made it very clear that when we get home
我們就離婚 不再有關系 We're finished, we're nothing.
現在至少我們還能這樣交流 Right now, at least we have this.
我還不想失去這個 Why would I wish for that to go away?
開始排練 Rehearsal's up!
我能問你點事情嗎 Hey. Can I ask you something?
你能回避一下嗎 Er, could you give us a sec?
怎么了 What's up?
這幕戲里 我知道他們在撒謊對吧 In this scene, I know the guys are lying to me, right?
對 Right.
但你要裝作不知道的樣子 But you don't want to give too much
之后再嚇他們一跳 away so you can surprise them later.
我也是這么想的 對了 還有 That's what I thought. Oh, and um, also,
昨晚看首映的時候 Jamie lapidus gave me a hand-job
杰米·拉皮多斯給我手淫了 during the show last night.
我必須告訴你 I had to tell you.
哦對啊 你搞別人老婆這種事 Oh, yeah, who better to share the news with
必須得告訴我是吧 you had sex with someone else's wife?!
其實也就是手淫一下 Well, first of all, just a hand-job.
可她老公就坐你們前面三排 With her husband three seats away!
我知道 I know!
-你還挺自豪啊 -沒有 - My god, you're proud of this?! - No.
但我必須說出來 一邊看你自己演的戲 But I gotta say, getting jerked-off
一邊有人幫你打炮 While you're watching yourself on TV?
是演員一輩子的夢想啊 Actors work their whole lives for that.
-還有誰知道這件事 -沒了 - Who else knows about this? - Nobody.
很好 別再說出去了 Good. Keep it that way.
默克·拉皮多斯最不希望在這部戲里看到的 The last thing our little show needs
就是你操他老婆 is for Merc Lapidus to find out that you are fucking his wife.
-再說一遍 我沒操她 -對他來說 - Again, not fucking. - I'm not sure he'll
你做的事和操她沒區別 appreciate the bloody distinction!
你腦子壞了啊 她是你老板的老婆 What's the matter with you? That woman is married to your boss!
既然說到這個 我倒要問問 And while we're on the subject, what is it with you
你怎么這么愛搞別人老婆 心理變態啊 And other people's wives?! it's pathological!
地球上其他那些沒男人的女性 Are there no other women in the world who aren't the spouses
你一個都不認識嗎 of people you know?! It...
干嗎 What?
這種對話久違了 I've missed this.
這件比那件好點 Mm, this one better than this one.
你還記得那件很酷的普拉達外套么 You know that cool prada jacket that you
你說我的角色肯定不會穿的那件 said my character would never wear?
我想到有一個地方可以用到它 I figured out where it would work.
-哪里 -我家 - Where? - My house.
-安妮 你能幫我拿來嗎 -好 - Annie, could you grab that for me? - Ok.
挺好 除了你誰還會順手牽羊啊 Well, good, because who's more deserving of free clothes than you?
你也能拿啊 你想要什么 You can take stuff. What do you want?
我可以像正常人一樣去商店買東西 Or I could go to a shop, like a normal person.
免費東西送你都不要 Yeah, someone who turns down free shit
可算不得正常人 - not a normal person.
-呃 肖恩生氣的這件事 -怎么 - So, listen, this thing with sean being pissed off. - Yeah?
你覺得他還要生多久的氣 How long do you think that's going to last?
沒法跟他聊天讓我感覺很奇怪 It's just weird not being able to talk to him about stuff.
是啊 真是委屈你了 Yes, this must be very hard for you!
沒錯 It is.
太好了 謝謝 Ah, that's great, thanks.
還有個帽子 There was a hat?
行 Sure.
我沒說他是不該生氣 我懂的 Look, I'm not saying he doesn't have a right to be mad, I get it,
但發火也總有個頭吧 說句"好吧算了" But at what point is it, like, "all right, already"?
-"好吧算了" -你知道我的意思 - "All right, already"?! - You know what I mean.
他發誓說絕對不會原諒我的 但我 He swears he'll never get over it, but I just...
只能選擇不信 我沒辦法 I have to believe it's not true. I just, I have to.
我明白了 Yeah. I hear you.
我也沒法怪他 I certainly can't blame him.
回頭看看我做的事情 就像是看 When I look back at what I did, it's like I'm looking at this
另一個完全跟我沒關系的人 whole other person doing these inexplicable things
在跟世界上我最討厭的家伙 with the absolutely last person on god's earth
做了些完全解釋不通的事情 I'd ever want to do them with.
不客氣 You're welcome.
事已至此 And now here we are,
我唯一在乎的人也要離我遠去了 And I may have lost the only thing I ever actually cared about.
如果有什么我能幫到你的話 Well, if there's anything I can do...
你就別噴那傻逼古龍水了 You could stop wearing that fucking cologne!
帽子怎么還沒來 How we doing on the hat?
你們看到了沒 Hey, did you guys see this?
我們劇的收視率上升了 Our ratings went up in the nationals.
你知道自己在看什么嗎 Do you have any idea what you're looking at?
不知道 No.
好險 我居然差一點點 I can't believe I came this close
-就沒接這部劇 -真的? - to not taking this show. - Really?
對 我今年有兩部戲的邀約 Yeah. I got two offers this year.
這部戲 還有人請我演出一部 This one, and they wanted me for the kid in that
狗說話的戲里的小孩 talking dog show.
還有狗說人話的劇 There's a talking dog show?
ABC電視臺的劇 下周首播 Over at ABC. It starts next week.
-其實這劇和我們是對手 -這戲有什么好 - Actually it's opposite us. - Any good?
哥們 狗會說人話啊 Dude, it's a talking dog show.
-是啊 哥們 -我本不知該選哪個 - Yeah, dude! - So, like, I wasn't sure which one to pick.
我老婆一直勸我 My wife was really pushing me to
-選另一部 -你老婆 - take the other one. - Er, your wife?
還不是正式的 Well, not officially, yet.
得等我離婚手續辦下來再說 Have to wait till my divorce comes through.
你這都第二次結婚了? This would be your second marriage?
理論上是這樣 第一次做不得真 Technically. I don't even count the first one.
根本他媽一團糟 It was just a big fucking mess.
-我們很小就結婚了 -娘胎里就結婚了 - We got married really young. - I assume as embryos.
我今年27 I'm 27.
-不是吧 -凱文29 斯透克都快31了 - You're not! - Kevin's 29. Stoke's going to be 31.
我們辦的這是什么怪中學 Very strange high school we're running!
歡樂合唱團那幫人估計都50歲了 Hey, the kids on Glee are, like, in their fifties.
打擾了 Excuse me.
-要開拍了嗎 -對 不過他們要你們 - Are we close to shooting? - Yeah, but they need you guys
到更衣室的布景去一下 over in the locker room set.
又要走路 Oh, I've got to walk.
太討厭了 It's awful!
祝你生日快樂 Happy birthday to you
祝你生日快樂 肖恩 Happy birthday, dear Sean
祝你生日快樂 Happy birthday to you.
是你安排的嗎 Did you do this?
-不是的 -馬特的主意 - Actually, no. - It's from Matt.
好吧 Ok.
-恭喜 -謝謝 - Congrats. - Thank you.
-生日快樂 -哇哦 - Happy birthday. - Oh wow!
恭喜了 Ah. Congratulations.
-大壽星啊 -謝了伙計 - Hey, birthday boy. - All right, man.
好的 切蛋糕了 Nice one. Right, come on. Dig in.
肖恩和貝佛利的辦公室 'Sean and Beverly's office.'
卡羅·蘭斯在二號線上 Carol Rance on two!
謝謝 Thank you.
-嗨 卡羅 -請稍等 卡羅馬上回來 - Hi, -Carol. - Hold for Carol, please.'
溫迪 來一下 Wendy, could you come here, please?
來了 Yeah.
可以的話 要是對方不在電話機旁 Would it be possible, when the person's not actually on the line,
你能不能跟我說一聲 這樣我就不用 You could alert me to that fact so that I don't...
-喂 -她來了 - Hi, you!' - There she is.
卡羅 什么事 Hi, Carol. What's up?
肖恩過生日 我陪你出去轉轉吧 I'm taking you out for Sean's birthday.
你不該孤零零的 You should not be alone.
真貼心 默克又放你鴿子了 Aw, that's sweet. Merc cancel again?
他忘記他孩子學校還有事 He forgot he had a thing at his kid's school.
有時候我就奇怪 我刮腿毛都是為了什么 Sometimes I wonder why I even shave my legs.
肖恩喜歡那塊表嗎 So, how did Sean like the watch?'
我不想當面送給他 他會尷尬的 I didn't want to put him on the spot when I gave it to him,
所以我請人放在他車上 So I had a PA put it in his car.
我就這樣了 怎么著吧 Yeah, so what?!
看看你 真是吸引眼球啊 Hey, look at you. Very impressive.
拜托 我吃了你他媽兩塊蛋糕 Please. I had two pieces of your fucking birthday cake!
大概得跑到克利夫蘭才能減下來 I need to run to, like, Cleveland.
盡情嘲笑我這個貪吃鬼吧 Say what you want about bulimia...
請別說下去了 Please don't finish that sentence.
我保證 只要我們這劇不被砍 I promise, once we're sure we're not getting cancelled,
我就繼續增加體重 I'll start packing on the pounds.
-不過在那之前 -我們離被砍遠著呢 - Till then... - We're doing a little better than not
你看過今天數據 getting cancelled. You saw those numbers today.
我知道 但是這個不一定 No, I know. Still.
什么 收視率那么... What? The ratings were...
沒錯 數據不錯 但大家還只是在嘗鮮 No, they were great, but that's just people sampling it.
咱們還是等到下周再看看 Let's wait till next week and see.
你還真是樂天派 Well, you're a big ball of positivity.
我參演過FOX 電視臺的一部戲 Hey, I once did this FOX show about
關于三個合住女孩的故事 these three girls living together.
我還是里面奶子最小的 I was the one with the smaller tits.
創意不錯 Interesting concept.
那一季 我們的首播數據 We had the highest number of any
是所有新劇里面最高的 new series premiering that season.
第二周 稍微差點 第三周 天啊 Week two, not so much. Week three, ooh.
數據一直下降 They kept dropping and dropping.
第六集就被砍了 They pulled the plug after six.
現在如果不能一次訂九集 Now I won't even decorate my dressing room
我都懶得裝飾我的化妝間 until we're picked up for the back nine.
開局強勢并不意味著 Just because you start out strong doesn't mean that...
-怎么 -你這是干什么 - What? - What are you doing?
-我只是說說 -今天是我生日 - I'm just saying. - It's my birthday.
我操 我太操蛋了 不會有事的 Oh, shit! I am an asshole! It's all good.
收視率絕對不會下降的 The ratings will never come down!
我本以為你的演技會比這個強點 I thought you were a better actress than that.
顯然你還沒看過對我這部戲的評論 Obviously you haven't read my reviews for this show.
生日你打算做點什么 So what are you doing for the birthday?
生日也沒什么大不了的 Oh, birthdays are no big deal.
-什么都不做 -沒事 我還有劇本要看 - So nothing? - I'm fine, I've got some scripts to look over and...
少來 我們好好慶祝下 Fuck that! we're going to celebrate.
心意我領了 但我 Well, I appreciate it, but I really...
這算是 And that was...?
生日禮物 Birthday present?
就禮物而言 這算是精心準備的了 Well, as gifts go, it was very thoughtful.
還有大份的呢 It also comes in large.
我怎么覺得有義務問一句 I don't know why I feel obliged to
你男朋友他 ask this, but your boyfriend...?
-什么男朋友 -你說你有男友 - What boyfriend? - You told me you had a boyfriend.
那看來我演技還不錯 Oh. Maybe I am a good actress.