m 20 0 l 209 0 b 218 0 229 11 229 20 l 229 209 b 229 218 218 228 209 228 l 20 228 b 11 228 0 218 0 209 l 0 20 b 0 11 11 0 20 0
m 115 64 l 115 35 l 171 0 l 177 0 l 133 46 l 143 52 l 179 0 l 184 0 l 159 63 l 229 107 l 229 182 l 145 96 l 135 122 l 207 227 l 137 227 l 115 172 l 115 93 l 126 76 l 115 64 l 104 76 l 115 93 l 115 172 l 93 227 l 23 227 l 95 122 l 84 96 l 0 182 l 0 107 l 70 63 l 45 0 l 50 0 l 87 52 l 97 46 l 52 0 l 59 0 l 115 35
m 71 60 b 71 0 161 0 161 60 b 161 120 71 120 71 60
m 325 0 l 355 0 l 332 47 l 354 47 l 399 136 l 369 136 l 328 53 l 288 136 l 257 136 l 325 0 m 467 0 l 497 0 l 474 47 l 496 47 l 541 136 l 511 136 l 470 53 l 430 136 l 399 136 l 467 0 m 545 1 l 583 1 l 583 14 l 568 14 l 568 19 l 583 19 l 583 30 l 568 30 l 568 34 l 599 34 l 599 30 l 583 30 l 583 19 l 599 19 l 599 14 l 583 14 l 583 1 l 611 1 b 616 1 622 6 622 10 l 622 36 l 652 0 l 678 0 l 644 41 l 622 41 l 622 47 l 596 47 l 597 54 l 625 54 l 625 68 l 541 68 l 541 54 l 572 54 l 571 47 l 545 47 l 545 1 m 583 72 l 583 85 l 569 85 l 569 90 l 598 90 l 598 85 l 583 85 l 583 72 l 611 72 b 615 72 621 78 621 82 l 653 44 l 678 44 l 644 86 l 621 86 l 621 103 l 597 103 l 597 136 l 570 136 l 564 126 l 562 136 l 542 136 l 548 107 l 568 107 l 565 121 l 571 121 l 571 103 l 547 103 l 547 72 l 583 72 m 600 107 l 620 107 l 624 124 l 653 89 l 679 89 l 642 136 l 615 136 l 618 132 l 606 132 l 600 107 m 689 0 l 716 0 l 721 15 l 732 15 l 732 30 l 718 56 l 731 56 l 735 100 l 721 100 l 717 59 l 714 64 l 714 136 l 693 136 l 693 79 l 676 79 l 707 30 l 679 30 l 679 15 l 694 15 l 689 0 m 738 0 l 804 0 b 807 0 813 6 813 9 l 813 87 l 794 87 l 794 14 l 756 14 l 756 87 l 763 77 l 763 21 l 787 21 l 787 91 l 798 91 l 798 120 l 820 120 l 812 136 l 778 136 l 778 90 l 748 136 l 723 136 l 756 87 l 738 87 l 738 0 m 257 151 l 275 151 l 297 182 l 319 151 l 337 151 l 304 197 l 304 227 l 290 227 l 290 197 l 257 151 m 337 151 l 355 151 l 377 182 l 399 151 l 417 151 l 384 197 l 384 227 l 370 227 l 370 197 l 337 151 m 425 192 l 447 192 b 445 181 427 181 425 192 l 410 192 b 414 162 458 162 462 192 l 462 206 l 425 206 b 425 210 429 212 433 213 l 462 213 l 462 227 l 433 227 b 412 227 408 203 410 192 m 462 151 l 532 151 l 532 165 l 504 165 l 504 227 l 489 227 l 489 165 l 462 165 l 462 151 m 580 172 l 580 186 l 549 186 b 543 186 543 192 549 192 l 565 192 b 589 192 589 227 565 227 l 532 227 l 532 213 l 565 213 b 570 213 570 206 565 206 l 549 206 b 524 206 524 172 549 172 l 580 172 m 592 213 l 606 213 l 606 227 l 592 227 l 592 213 m 639 172 l 665 172 l 665 186 l 639 186 b 623 186 623 213 639 213 l 665 213 l 665 227 l 639 227 b 603 227 603 172 639 172 m 700 184 b 722 184 722 215 700 215 l 700 229 b 740 229 740 170 700 170 b 660 170 660 229 700 229 l 700 215 b 680 215 680 184 700 184 m 737 172 l 782 172 b 803 172 813 177 813 198 l 813 228 l 799 228 l 799 198 b 799 186 793 187 782 187 l 782 228 l 768 228 l 768 187 l 752 187 l 752 228 l 737 228 l 737 172
I am afraid it's a no on lunch.
Bev just isn't up for it.
Unless you want to do it without her.
It feels a little weird.
Sweetie, it's a sandwich, not a blow job.
Kim sally, as promised,
this is sean lincoln.
- This is awesome! - Good news?
You know that guy who got my part in the NBC pilot?
paralyzed!
Oh, my god.
The man is paralyzed.
Jesus!
Be happy for me for once!
There he is!
So, what's up?
Should I be worried?
What?
I can't take my favorite client to lunch?
We got a lot to celebrate.
Last week of "Pucks."
It's worth a steak salad.
Okay. Good.
I got nervous.
Thought you were gonna tell me,
like, that guy's not paralyzed anymore.
Relax. It's apparently a lot worse than they thought.
Okay. Phew!
So, where are we with the NBC thing?
Do we have a deal?
So I should be worried.
No, not "Worried" Worried.
Now, look -- the writer, the british guy,
Totally wants you.
You're his first choice, only one on his list.
- Blah, blah, blah. - So?
So the network is saying that they need to hear you read.
Get the fuck out.
What can I tell you?
You've never done drama.
- Have they seen "Pucks"? - Yeah.
That's probably another reason they want you to read.
Well, screw them.
I'm not reading for NBC.
I worked there for 12 years.
That was a lifetime ago.
Everyone who was there when you were there,
they're that pile of bones in the corner.
Jesus.
Audition?
I know, but that's the world we live in.
If Lucille Ball came back from the dead,
They'd make her read to see if she's still funny.
Although I got to say, she wasn't...
that funny at the end.
Nobody's funny at the end.
What if we say no?
Well, then they say no.
Listen, I've been around and around
with these idiots on this.
It's a nonstarter.
If you really want it --
You know I want it.
But I'm not reading.
You sure?
It's insulting.
They know what I can do.
I'm not gonna jump through their hoops.
Okay. That's what I'll tell them.
- Christ. - I know!
What can I say?
It's a giant hairy ass fuck.
We're ready to order.
I'm thinking it's time to stop taking the meds.
I firmly disagree.
I'm telling you, I really feel okay.
I'm calm. I'm centered.
Nothing's talking that shouldn't be talking.
I'm really good.
The reason you're good is because of the meds.
It would be a huge mistake to stop now.
I cannot stress this enough.
Okay. Okay.
I hear you.
That's fine.
You're awfully quiet.
Am I?
Well, considering "Am I?"
is the first thing you've said since we started, yes.
So, is "Am I?" Also the last thing you're going to say?
Maybe.
What's going on?
Nothing.
What?
"What?"
You are acting very weird.
- Am I? - Aren't you?
I'll just say this --
There are no secrets in this town.
And yet you seem to have one.
Isn't it funny?
With all your judgments
and your moral high ground --
There you go. Let it out.
"Everyone's so phony here.
"You can't trust anyone.
They'll lie to your face."
well, guess what.
You're no better than we are!
In fact, I would never do to you what you did to me!
I have to say
I am now simultaneously troubled and excited
to find out what I did.
And thank you for the uncanny impression, by the way.
Did you actually think that I wouldn't find out?
This is torture.
I know you're shopping a script to Kim Sally at Fox.
What?! Who's...Kim sally?
"Who's kim sally?"
How would you feel if you found out...
If you found out that the person
you thought was your best friend -- ha ha! --
was secretly shopping a script
to another network?
I don't know what the hell you're talking about.
Oh, really?! Really?!
Then why was Sean having lunch
with kim sally and eileen jaffee?
And don't tell me they weren't,
'cause I was there, and I saw them.
Okay, fine. Yeah, fine.
I had a bite of lunch with them,
But it was nothing.
A club sandwich.
There were also appetizers,
And I'm pretty sure they split a sundae.
Since when do we take meetings without each other?
Not a meeting. A sandwich.
Bullshit!
Nobody "Takes a sandwich" In this town.
Look, you said you didn't want to go.
You didn't say I couldn't go.
Really?
That's your loophole?
A loophole's a loophole. It counts.
- Don't. - Don't.
And what was your plan, exactly?
Were you gonna do the whole show behind my back?
"Darling, you know that script from the drawer?
Congratulations! It's in its ninth year."
No. No.
I was very clear.
She knows she can't have it.
Damn straight she can't have it.
If anyone's getting it, I'm getting it.
You're not getting it.
- I want it. - Why? You haven't even read it.
- I read it! - You read it.
Eileen gave it to me.
Really? What'd you think?
Oh, my god!
If "Pucks" was half this good,
you'd still be on the air.
Flattered and hurt.
You guys, it's so good!
I swear, if you let us do it,
we won't change a word.
Really? Could you put that in writing?
What are you doing? No, no, no.
Let me be absolutely clear with you,
And you, Mr. Club Sandwich --
This script isn't going to you.
It isn't going to Fox.
The only place it's going is in our suitcase home.
Okay.
I totally hear you.
- But -- - Obviously, you don't hear me.
I do!
- But - No. No more "Buts."
Fine!
I just --
No "Buts" And no "Justs."
Either you let go of this, or you and I are done.
This is your moment of truth.
Are you my friend,
Or are you some bloodsucking network vampire?
Why do I have to pick one or the other?
Sorry.
It's time to choose.
Now.
Fine!
I'm your friend.
But I'm not happy about it!
Thank you.
Then you don't mention this again.
You don't pursue it behind our backs.
It's over.
Can I just ask one question?
And don't get mad.
What if I'd picked the other one?
Any way you would have given it to me?
Fine!
Friend.
Oh. I'm telling you, you guys can't go back to london
until you've tried one of these.
See? And I thought we could.
You'll see. You're gonna thank me.
We're not really hot-dog people.
How can you not be hot-dog people?
It's just all the sodium and nitrates.
Plus, god only knows what else is ground up in them.
Frankly, I'm more concerned about the casings.
I assume they still use pig intestines.
I forgot how fun it is to share shit with you.
Publicist.
Hey, beth.
Hi, honey.
I'm gonna conference Jason in.
You're on with Jason.
Hey, bud.
Hey, man. What's up?
Okay.
I just got off with TMZ.
They're about to run a story.
They've got it on good authority you're going into rehab
for cocaine and diet pills.
Are you shitting me?
So you're not?
No.
Honest?
How can you even ask me that?
Uh, you were a little sniffy at lunch,
And you didn't touch the bread.
Jesus.
Oh, good, good. Okay.
I just had to make sure.
So, are you sure now?
Yeah, yeah. But you talk about bad timing.
I just told NBC you won't read.
And?
Well, they're supposed to get back to me,
But they're already nervous about working with you.
When they hear about this, on top of your D.U.I.?
Well, why can't we just tell TMZ it's bullshit?
Oh. They'll never buy that.
You're better off just admitting it and moving on.
But it's not true.
You asked. I'm telling you.
What do you want from me?
Well, then how do we make it go away?
Any idea where it could have come from?
No. I...
Oh, fuck.
I forgot to send my father his check.
You really think your father planted that story?
I know he did.
Anytime I forget to send his check,
He calls the tabloids and makes up some bullshit --
Hang on.
Dad, pick up.
Pick up.
Pick up the fucking phone, you lying sack of shit!
I'm on my cell. Call me.
He's not gonna call.
I got to go over there.
You mind if we swing by? It's right on the way.
Uh, this is really a family thing.
You don't need us there for that.
Yeah, I do.
Because if it's just me and him,
I'm gonna fucking kill him.
When will we learn?
Always -- always -- take two cars?
Hey. Is he in?
We're supposed to do the prep for our elliot salad lunch.
He's in, but...
But?
He's kind of not having the best day.
'cause we really should do this before tomorrow.
I don't know what to tell you.
Sorry to bother you.
But we said we were going to prep for the elliot lunch?
It's very dark.
Want me to turn on a light?
Or I can leave it off.
Should I leave it off?
I'll leave it off.
So, uh...
I just think we should have some idea
of what we're going to say...
Like which projects we're excited about.
- None. - None.
Okay.
Good.
See, I didn't know you felt that way.
We're fucked.
Okay.
Everything we have is shit.
Everything?
Really?
That seems a little bleak.
I-I think we have a couple of strong --
- We don't. - No?
No.
Nothing's fresh.
Nothing's bold.
It's all the same rehashed,
pre-digested garbage.
It's like everything you gave me
arrived pre-canceled!
I'm so disappointed in you.
I thought you were gonna thrill me.
Do I look thrilled?
It's kind of hard to see you.
- Do I?! - No.
- What?! - No. You don't look thrilled.
I'm just a little confused.
Last week, it seemed like you thought
some of it wasn't shit.
I was being polite.
I don't like to hurt people's feelings.
- What did you say?! - What? Nothing!
Nothing.
And that's all you give me --
Nothing!
Get out!
Wait, wait, wait.
I may have one more script for you to read.
"May"?
What the fuck does "May" Mean?!
Don't give me "May"!
Okay. I do! I have one more script!
- Comedy or drama?! - Comedy!
Oh, good.
I could use a laugh.
Look who's here.
Hi, Linda.
Ooh. So skinny.
You lost weight.
Yeah. I wish.
Well, you look it.
Come on in.
I'm making fruit salad.
Your friends want fruit?
- No. That's very kind. - Thank you, no.
Suit yourself.
Where is he?
Ah. He's out.
You just missed him.
Well, when he gets back,
tell him I'm gonna punch his face in.
You want to punch my face?
Look what's here.
I just said you were out.
Next time, say it louder.
What am I -- a mind reader?
So, what'd I do this time?
You know what you did.
Bullshit. If I knew what I did,
I wouldn't say, "What did I do?"
Don't ask me to say stuff
if you're not gonna back me up.
I look like a liar.
- We are Sean and Beverly, by the way. - Hello.
You saying you didn't tell tmz I'm going into rehab?
Oh, you're finally going into rehab?
No, I'm not going into rehab.
Is that why I didn't get my check?
You didn't get your check because I fucking forgot.
Do they know to keep sending them while you're away?
I'm not going into rehab!
TMZ's usually right about this stuff.
The only reason they're saying it
is 'cause you fucking told them.
I didn't tell them.
I didn't even know you were going.
Listen to me, you lunatic.
You're gonna call them and say you were wrong.
What is the big deal? Everybody's in rehab.
I-I can't say it again.
He's not going into rehab.
And if people think he is,
It could seriously damage his career.
Where are you from?
What career?
He hasn't been on TV in 10 years.
I'm on TV now!
Oh, that thing with the hockey.
We watched it once.
I'm so glad we came.
Yeah, well, that non-career of mine sure pays for a lot.
He's always got to rub our noses in it.
You're sure? No fruit?
You couldn't afford it.
You don't think we know what you're worth?
We googled you.
You can google what I'm worth?
You can google anything.
How much did it say?
Really? In front of strangers?
How much?
60.
"60"?
Too high or too low?
I'm not fucking telling you.
So, what? So you know how much to gouge me?
You hear that?
Gouge him.
He is your father.
You show him some respect.
Use a spoon! What are you -- an animal?
Relax. It's fruit.
You know, you just waltz in here with your $60 million.
It's not 60.
You think I like taking money from you?
You don't think it's embarrassing for me?
Well, not too embarrassing to take it.
Why? Y-you'd rather we starve to death?
We're not exactly rolling in it here.
You know, I haven't had a vacation in four years.
From what?!
- Oh, fuck you! - Fuck you!
Is that papaya?
I hope not.
Okay. Last chance.
You gonna call tmz or not?
And tell them what?
I can't undo something I didn't do.
That's it. I'm cutting you off.
Listen, you fat fuck --
if the man says he didn't do it --
You want to cut me off, cut me.
- Consider yourself cut. - Fine.
I don't need your goddamn money.
No? How about all the shit you bought with it.
Huh? You need this?
Wait, wait, wait, wait, wait.
What are you doing?
Oh, he says he doesn't need it.
Eh, take it. I hate that lamp.
It's like reading on the surface of the sun.
Since when do you read?
Oh, fuck you.
This makes me very uncomfortable.
I'm guessing you don't need these pillows, either.
Take them. They only get in the way.
They add color.
Here.
I am so sorry.
I had no inkling when he brought us here...
Shut up!
You need the microwave?
I know I paid for this.
It was a christmas present.
It shouldn't count.
Who gives a shit?! Let him take it!
What, you're gonna wait for the water to boil?
Here.
No, give me that.
Give me that.
Don't let her take it.
She's very strong.
She's an 80-year-old woman!
Fuck you, 80!
I'm calling the police!
Better do it before I take back the phones.
- Do something. - You do something.
God damn it!
I wish David Schwimmer was my son.
So do I!
Fuck you.
Fuck you!
This is nice.
Is it new?
None of your business.
And it's roomy.
You can put a lot of crap in there.
You want me to go up and get some more?
Fuck you.
Fuck you! Get in the car.
Drop dead, you piece of shit!
So nice to meet you.
You too.
Get in!
I have to say, this feels like rather harsh justice.
It's not.
He's a lying scumbag, and he went too far this time.
Still, shouldn't you at least give it to a charity
or the homeless?
Yeah.That's what the homeless need -- throw pillows.
Hi, honey. It's Veth.
So, I just got off with TMZ.
Do you know a woman named dawn randolph?
No.
Morning's daughter?
Oh. Yeah.
Understandable.
You only fucked her once.
What about her?
Evidently, she's the one who gave TMZ the rehab story.
Guess I should have called her back.
Maybe.
Can I tell them she's just an angry ex?
Yeah, yeah. Sure.
So, it definitely wasn't my father?
Definitely. They know him over there.
Wasn't him this time.
Gotcha. Thanks.
Shouldn't you give it all back?
Nah.
It'll keep him on his toes.
Yeah. Counting equities, counting real estate,
The office-building thing -- all of it --
Just roughly a ballpark figure.
Really?
How the hell would google know that?
Hang on. I got another call.
Let me call you back. Okay.
Hello?
Just got off with NBC.
Guess what.
They blinked.
Seriously?
You don't have to audition.
No shit?
No shit.
You just have to go in and meet.
Why?
Why? So they can save face.
Look, you'll make nice. They'll make nice.
You'll blow their skirts up.
I can do that.
I know you can.
And I don't have to read?
And you don't have to read.
All right.
Great.
Don't say I never did anything for you.
You're the one who told me you thought I should read.
Hey, if I were right about everything,
you'd still have a movie career.
This is very unusual.
He's never late.
It's fine.
Gives us a chance to catch up.
Totally.
So, what's new?
Well, uh, my wife has hodgkin's disease.
And I bought a tesla.
- Oh, my god. - I know.
It's so strange,
knowing I'll never have to buy gas again.
Sure.
Feels good.
So, talk to me...
Before he gets here.
How's he doing?
Castor?
Oh, shit.
No. No, no, no. All good.
Are we in trouble here?
I don't think so.
Jesus, fuck!
No, we're fine.
It's just I should probably give you a little heads-up.
What?
Sometimes he can seem a bit...
Gay?
No.
- Anti-semitic? - No.
What, then?
Apologies, apologies! Oh!
Sorry I'm late.
No. Sit, sit, sit, sit.
So sorry I'm late.
I was actually here 20 minutes early,
But I refuse to valet park.
I know. Crazy!
But they sit in your seat. They touch your wheel.
Anyway...
I ended up parking halfway to Burbank,
but I'm here now.
Just give me a sec to look at the menu,
see if there's anything I can eat.
Then I'm all yours.
What do you mean, anything you can eat?
I'm vegan.
That's a pain in the ass.
My daughter's vegan.
It's supposed to be very healthy.
Tell that to her scale.
She weighs 230 pounds, and she's 5'1".
That's a lot of vegan.
Place ain't gonna smell the same without you.
Now get out of here, ladies.
And...Cut!
Check the gate.
And that, my friends, is a final wrap on "Pucks"!
- Oh, my god. - It's over.
It's actually over.
I know. Unbelievable.
Should we say a little something?
We probably should.
Everyone, can I have your attention, please?
Or Chris will.
Before everyone scatters,
there's something I really have to say,
and I cannot stress it enough.
You must be sure to see Amy
and return your dressing-room keys.
Otherwise, there will be a $50 key charge.
Thank you.
Not quite the speech I would have given.
But it came from the heart.
I've got to say, I'm a little sad.
I know.
Me too, which is surprising,
considering I hated every single minute of it.
Hello.
We were just saying this all feels very strange.
What?
Oh. Yeah.
Oh, I'm gonna miss you guys!
Maybe we should all go out for a drink or something.
Absolutely.
That sounds great, except I can't.
I've got a wig fitting.
My pilot starts tomorrow.
She's stealing the wardrobe.
Yes, she is.
Uh, I didn't know you had a pilot.
What's it about?
Oh, it's this stupid sci-fi thing
About eight people who, uh, survive a nuclear holocaust,
And they want my hair short.
Well, sure. Nuclear holocaust.
Definitely calls for a pixie cut.
Yeah. Well, this hair's not going anywhere for a pilot.
All righty.
I guess this is it.
Sad face.
Yes. Sad faces all around.
Take care, you guys.
- Bye-bye. - Bye-bye.
Bye.
And then there were two.
Sad face?
I don't think so.
We're going home.
I'll believe it when we're eating nuts on the plane.
We are going home.
Oh, we are going home!
You got to taste this carrot.
I don't know why,
but that's the best carrot I ever tasted.
It's 'cause you're hungry.
So...Talk to me.
Where are we? Tell me something good.
Okay. Well, first of all, this one's a genius.
What?
Uh...Wow. Thank you.
Yesterday I was kind of down.
I don't know if you could tell.
A little bit, yeah. A little.
I was all, "Oh, we don't have anything.
What are we gonna tell Elliot?!"
Then this lady hands me a script.
Just pulls it out of her ass.
I read it last night.
Oh, my god.
It's gonna turn this network around.
Okay. This is what I want to hear.
You're talking about "The opposite of us"?
Uh, yeah.
Ah. It is so goddamn good!
The writing -- razor-sharp.
The comedy.
Fuck!
I was laughing out loud.
I never laugh out loud.
He doesn't.
It's got heart.
It's a show you want to watch.
I want to watch it right now.
I'm excited. You're talking, and I'm excited.
Who wrote it?
Sean and Beverly Lincoln.
You know, the team who did "Pucks."
And it's good?
I'm telling you -- it's not just good.
It's a home run.
This one found a winner.
That's very generous.
But before we commit to this,
There are a lot of other really great scripts
That I could, you know, pull out of my ass.
What? No! This is it.
I don't want to even shoot a pilot.
I want to go straight to series.
How soon can they start?