前情提要
你们看什么呢 What are you guys staring at?
翻译：持久 小肚腩
在看安德鲁·莱斯利那个小贱人 That dick whistle Andrew Lesley.
安德鲁·莱斯利也来了 Andrew Lesley's here?
翻译：别扭大菜 NANA
我一直没机会跟你说我很喜欢你的剧本 I didn't get a chance to tell you I loved your script.
校对：NANA小霸王
才没有 You did not.
-真是个混蛋 -哪一个 - What an asshole. - Which one?
时间轴：浓子
随便选 Take your pick.
这家电视台从来没有让女人担任过这职位 This network has never had a woman in that job.
后期：鱼骨头 总监：NANA小霸王
你不觉得这会... Don't you think it would--
你觉得海伦·拜什怎么样 What about Helen Basch?
她表现的若无其事 但是拜托 She acts like nothing happened, but come on.
我毁了她的婚姻 I broke up her marriage.
她怎么可能让我当她的副手 You think she's gonna want me as her number two?
打给你的经纪人 Call your agent.
卖剧本 挣大钱 Sell your show. Make the money.
我很抱歉 I'm sorry.
联邦调查局在调查 The FBI's been investigating him
他窃取客户资产的事 for stealing money from his clients.
-拉里 -你在他那放了多少钱 - Larry? - How much do you have with him?
什么多少钱 是所有钱 What do you mean how much? All of it.
-糟糕 -挨千刀的王八羔子 - Oh, shit. - Motherfucking son of a bitch.
-愿他安息 -你跟谁是一伙的 - May he rest in peace. - Whose side are you on?
戏里戏外 第四季 第二集
亲爱的 是我贝丝 吵醒你了吗 Hi, honey, it's Beth. Did I wake you?
好的 听我说 Okay, listen.
我快被打来的评论电话淹没了 I've been getting tons of calls for a comment.
关于什么的 About what?
资金窃取的事 The money thing.
什么 The what?
资金窃取的事 The money thing.
拉里·彭策尔 窃取你的资金 Larry Penzel? Stealing your money?
天哪 对了 Oh, Jesus, right.
该死 Oh, fuck me.
我替你写了一个简短的声明 Okay, so I've written a short statement for you.
我只是想跟你确认一下看你是不是认可 I just want to make sure you're comfortable with it.
“17年来 "For 17 years,
“拉里·彭策尔一直是我的投资经理人 Larry Penzel was my business manager
“和生活中的朋友” and personal friend."
臭不要脸的 Evil sack of shit.
“我可以证实他从我这儿 "I can confirm that he misappropriated
“窃取了一大笔资金” a substantial amount of money from me."
祝他在地狱里被轮奸 Hope they're raping him in hell.
“然而 还有其他受害者 "However, there are other victims of his fraud
“损失远比我还要多” who lost much more than I did."
是真的吗 Is that true?
我不知道 I don't know.
“我向彭策尔先生的遗孀及孩子们深表同情” "My sympathies go out to Mr. Penzel's widow and children."
不 才不同情 No, they don't.
“她们的损失远比我多得多” "Their loss is much greater than mine."
-瞎扯 -有其他意见吗 - Bullshit. - Any other thoughts?
我希望他能起死回生 I hope he comes back to life,
得个屁癌 然后再死一回 gets ass cancer, and dies again.
好吧 我再过一遍 All right, let me give it another pass.
不 Oh, no.
怎么 What?
-你说怎么 -又不完全一样 - "What?" - They're not the same.
他们自己都分不清谁是谁 Another checked shirt couldn't tell them apart.
艾琳 你好 Eileen. Hello?
伙计们 你们在一块儿吗 Hi, guys, are you two together?
简直了 You have no idea.
要汇报的可多了 So, lots to report.
我把所有电视台的会面都排在周五了 I set up all our network meetings for Friday.
我想我们可以连着一路见过来 I figure we'll do them in a row, bang, bang, bang,
然后吃个午饭 沟通一下 and then go for lunch and see where we are.
听这计划不错 Sounds like a plan.
好的 周五见 Okay, see you Friday!
大家都想签你们 一定会很有意思的 Everybody wants you. This is gonna be so fun!
-拜 -谢谢你 - Bye. - Thank you.
怎么 What?
你真的还想再遭这种罪吗 You really want to go through this again?
就我们现在的经济状况 不去就太蠢了 Financially I think we'd be foolish not to.
这回也许会不一样 你也说不准 It might be different this time. You don't know.
亲爱的 怎么可能会不同呢 Darling, why on earth would it be different?
至少听听他们会说些什么 Let's at least hear what they have to say.
他们说什么无关紧要 It doesn't matter what they say.
他们说的肯定都是我们想听的 They'll say whatever we want to hear.
他们总不可能全都是狡猾的贱人 Look, they can't all be devious fuckwits.
当然可能了 Yes, they can!
那这样呢 我们去会面 Okay, how about this? We take the meetings.
然后拒绝他们 And shove them?
如果我们能找到一家我们都觉得 If we can find one that we both agree
不会毁掉剧本主旨的电视台 won't crush our souls,
那我们就考虑做这个剧 then we'll consider doing the show.
否则就让剧本继续在抽屉里待着 Otherwise, back in the drawer it goes.
-那就赌一把 -谢谢你 - I'll take those odds. - Thank you.
我更喜欢刚刚那件衣服 I liked the other shirt better.
我知道 I know.
你穿着呢 You're wearing it.
有多糟 How bad is it?
一方面 即使资金遭到窃取 Well, on one hand, even with the embezzlement,
你仍然是个有钱人 you're still a wealthy man.
那另一方面呢 And the other hand?
看看这个 Take a look at this.
你要是按现在的花销水平继续下去 If you maintain your current rate of spending,
到这一年你就会花光所有的钱 you'll run out of money by the time you get here.
2019年 2019?
去他妈的另一方面 Fucking other hand.
问题在你几乎没有现金 The problem is you have virtually no cash.
都困在非流动资产上了 Everything's tied up in non-liquid assets:
房产 汽车 一颗恐龙蛋 Real estate, automobiles, a dinosaur egg?
没错 可棒了 Yeah, it's pretty awesome.
有这么大 上面都是斑点 It's, like, this big with spots on it and--
我们需要做的是 What we need to do
把其中一部分转为创收资产 is convert some of that to income-generating capital.
什么意思 卖家产 Meaning what, sell shit?
没错 Right.
我们还需要做的是 What we also need to do
减少你的花销 is look at reducing your expenses.
显然有些是不可避免的固定支出 Obviously there are fixed costs that are unavoidable.
保险 医疗 Insurance, medical,
你父亲公寓的房贷 the mortgage on your father's condo.
那个倒是还可以商量 Um, that one's not in stone.
你准备好要驱逐你的父亲 You're prepared to evict your father?
我是说就把这个留作后手 I'm just saying let's keep it in our back pocket.
好吧 孩子的抚养费 赡养费 All right. Uh, child support, alimony--
那个实际上也不需要了 Actually, that one's going away.
我前妻就要再婚了 My ex-wife's getting remarried.
那可真是省了一大笔 Well, that's a sizable saving.
恭喜啊 Congratulations.
知道是什么时候吗 Do we know when that's happening?
不知道 但我可以问问 No, but I can find out.
把这一项去掉会是一个很大的帮助 Taking that off the books will be a big help, big.
看见没 也并非全是另一方面 See? It's not all the other hand.
这还只是开始 It's a start.
我们还得跟你谈谈你的一些 We also need to talk about some of your more, uh,
自由支出 discretionary expenses.
Jose Padilla是谁 Who is Jose Padilla?
帮我打扫海滩的 He's the guy who sweeps my beach.
如果他不打扫了呢 And if he didn't?
那谁来打扫 Who's gonna do it?
对 这就是可能需要削减的支出 See, that's the kind of thing we may need to eliminate.
有点过激了吧 Wow, that seems pretty drastic.
我们再考虑考虑 Well, let's think about it.
还有一个葡萄园 All right, um, there's the vineyard.
不 不 那可是有收入的 No, no. No, that's income-producing.
我酿的酒赚了不少钱 I make money on the wine.
事实上 亚伦算了算 Actually, Aaron ran the numbers.
你在葡萄园运作上的花销 For what you're spending to operate the vineyard--
新设备 保险 员工薪水 new equipment, insurance, salaries--
算下来一瓶的成本是1100美元 it's actually costing you about $1,100 a bottle.
我不能把葡萄园卖了 I-I can't sell the vineyard.
首先 我的名字可是印在酒瓶上的 First of all, my name is on the label.
此外我还花了 Plus I got, like,
一万五千块印的运动衫 T恤 帽子 $15,000 worth of sweatshirts and T-shirts
印着我的商标呢 and hats with my logo on it.
不 不卖 No, not selling it.
没得商量 It's off the table.
好吧 那架飞机呢 All right, there's the plane.
-不行 -那可是相当大的... - No. - It's a huge--
不 飞机也没得商量 No, the plane is off the table.
-可是 -下一个 - But-- - Move on.
我想我们应该讨论一下汽车收藏 I think we should discuss the possibility
变现的可能性 of liquidating the car collection.
滚 Fuck you.
好吧 Okay.
所以也没得商量吗 So that's not on the table?
想都别想 Not even near the table.
但你打算赶走你父亲 But you're prepared to evict your father?
我的车又不是混蛋 Not one of those cars is an asshole.
我们继续 Let's keep going.
我们查到您花了12万6千 We're showing you spent $126,000
黑手党头目
买了一瓶阿尔·卡彭曾经收藏过的白兰地 on a single bottle of Brandy once owned by Al Capone?
算是历史文物嘛 A little piece of history.
那你舍不舍得卖了它呢 Can you see yourself parting with it?
我已经喝了 I drank it.
当时我喝醉了 酒就摆在那 I was drunk. It was there.
有脑子的人都知道这简直难以抗拒 As a business decision, it's hard to defend.
不好说啊 I don't know.
完全没有共鸣 This did nothing for me.
我也是 感觉与我们的生活不贴切 I agree. It just doesn't feel like us.
-我挺喜欢的 -真的吗 - I liked it. - Really?
我挺喜欢主角之间的关系设定 I like the relationships between the characters.
我喜欢动作喜剧 给人焕然一新的感觉 I like the physical comedy. It feels fresh.
但我们真的要拍一部木偶剧吗 But do we really want to do a show with puppets?
木偶 Puppets?
海伦·拜什来见你了 Uh, Helen Basch is here to see you?
海伦来了 天呐 快让她进来 Helen's here? Oh, my God, send her in.
“我打扰你们了吗” "Am I interrupting?"
我这显然是打扰了 Said the woman who's clearly interrupting.
没事进来吧 随意打扰 Please, interrupt away.
我来介绍下 So, introductions.
不用说 这位就是海伦·拜什 Obviously, Helen Basch.
这是安迪·巴顿 Andy Button.
你好 能给我加薪吗 Hi, can I have a raise?
太早了吧 现在就提 Too soon?
这位是麦拉·李赫特 And Myra Licht.
其实我和麦拉去年就在阿斯彭喜剧节见过了 Actually, Myra and I met last year at the Aspen Comedy Festival.
好吧 Okay.
瞧瞧你现在呀 你... And now look at you. You're--
咋了 What?
们要一起共事了 Going to be working together.
没错 等不及了 特别激动 Yes, can't wait. So excited.
你的员工都很棒呀 You got quite the crew here.
这样吧 你们让我俩单独聊聊 All righty, how about you guys give us a few minutes?
很高兴见到你 加薪什么的真是我开玩笑 So nice meeting you. Totally kidding about the raise.
基本算是 Sort of.
我们待会再见 I'll see you both soon.
拜拜 Bye-bye.
天呐 我还以为她... Oh, my God. I totally thought she was--
她从没提过 我们也不敢问 She's never said, and we're all afraid to ask.
肯定有什么不对劲 Well, something's going on in there.
她要不是怀了孩子 那就是吃了一个 If she's not having one, she definitely ate one.
快请坐吧 So, sit, sit, sit.
我们都很激动能请到您 We are all so thrilled you are here.
谢谢 Thank you.
是这样 我必须先把一些事说清楚 All right, look, I need to get this out of the way.
咱们还是别装啥事没有了 Can we talk about the elephant in the room?
当然 Oh, sure.
早知道我该做做准备 I wish I'd brought peanuts.
在你说之前 我要郑重道歉 Okay, before you say anything, I am so sorry.
要是世界上有后悔药的话 我肯定买 If I could go back in time and undo it, I would.
没有任何借口 There is no excuse.
我当时年轻 还很幼稚 I was young. I was naive.
好吧 这就是两个借口了 Okay, those are both excuses.
但那是我第一份正经工作 But it was my first real job.
他很强势 还能振奋人心 He was powerful and exciting,
你压根不知道我到底在说什么 and you have no idea what I'm talking about.
不知道 Nope.
到底是有多少事要谈 How many elephants are in here?
-早上好 -早 - Morning. - Morning.
稍等 One sec.
你来干什么呀 What are you doing here?
马特·勒布朗来找你们了 Matt LeBlanc is here to see you.
多谢提前告知 Thanks for the heads up.
提什么 The what?
是什么风把你刮来了 So, to what do we owe the pleasure
还是你又是来让我们开眼界的 or whatever it is we're about to experience?
我们也很想邀请你坐下 但是 We'd offer you a seat, but, um--
是啊 你们那破沙发哪去了 Yeah, what happened to your shitty couch?
我们只知道从伦敦回来沙发就不见了 We know when we came back from London, it was gone,
随便找个箱子坐吧 so, uh, pull up a box.
有啥事吗 What's up?
我需要帮助 I kind of need a favor.
-不行 -要不先让他说完吧 - No. - Maybe let him ask first?
谢谢 Thank you.
好吧 帮啥忙 Fine. What?
我想让你们找安德鲁·莱斯利谈谈 I need you to talk to Andrew Lesley.
-去你的 -想都别想 - Fuck off. - No way.
他不肯让我参演他的试播集 Look, he won't let me do his pilot
因为他觉得我还在演我们这狗屎玩意 'cause he thinks I'm still doing our piece of crap.
多谢夸奖 Oh, thank you.
你得告诉他我们这个已经挂了 You got to convince him ours is dead.
他会听你们的 你们以前认识的 He'll listen to you guys. You got the history.
不行 想都别想 No, forget it.
我们是不可能和那个自以为是 There is no way we are speaking
表里不一 屁话连篇的围巾男说话的 to that smug, duplicitous, talking scarf.
我本来想说“除非猪从你屁眼飞出来” I was about to say "when pigs fly out of your ass",
但我见过你吃的啥 想着也不是没可能 but I've seen what you eat, so it's not an impossibility.
求你们了嘛 我已经走投无路了 Come on! I'm desperate here.
他们都想让我卖了葡萄园 They want me to sell my vineyard!
你居然有葡萄园 You have a vineyard?
我没送过你们葡萄酒吗 I never gave you a bottle?
-没 -没有 - No. - No.
我马上就给你们一瓶 Well, you are definitely getting a bottle
还有运动衫 还有帽子 and a sweatshirt and a hat.
我太激动了 I'm excited.
如果你真的急需用钱 If you need money so badly,
为什么不把飞机卖了 why don't you just sell your plane?
飞机没得商量 The plane is off the table!
我需要接戏工作 What I need is work.
我知道我的请求很无理 Look, I realize what I'm asking,
但只需要花你们几分钟时间 but it's a few minutes of your time,
就能挽回我的人生啊 求你们了 and it would mean everything to me, come on.
好吧 我们会打电话的 Fine, we'll call him.
你们得当面说 You got to do it in person.
-去你的 -当面 门都没有 - Fuck off. - In person? No fucking way.
我的经纪人和经理都打过电话 My agent called him. My manager called him.
打电话是根本行不通的 It's not gonna work over the phone.
必须得面对面说 It's got to be face-to-face.
-没门 -去你的 - No. - Fuck off.
要是你帮我这个忙 If you do this for me,
我就带你去金球奖赞助商展示活动 I will take you to a Golden Globes gifting suite.
再多说点 Say more.
等等 Wait, wait.
所以不是你要求他和我分手的吗 So you didn't make him break up with me?
我压根都不知道他找小三了 I didn't even know there was a you.
所以也不是你要求他开除我的吗 And you didn't make him fire me?
要是我知道的话我可能会这么做 I probably would have if I'd known.
这么说能让你感觉好点吗 Does that help?
所以说他干的那些事 So he did all that
都只是为了不想再跟我交往 just to stop seeing me?
我的天哪 Oh, my God!
我知道你爱过他 Look, I get that you loved him,
我也知道你很难接受 and I know this is hard to hear,
但爱德就是个情绪易怒 but Ed was an emotionally stunted,
满口谎言的臭傻逼 compulsively lying, evil sack of shit.
他人看着真的很好啊 He seemed so nice.
至少你逃脱了 我还在付他赡养费呢 Hey, at least you got out. I'm still paying him alimony.
我能问你个问题吗 Can I ask you something?
你想谈的事是什么 Uh, what was your elephant?
我听说你在另谋他职 Oh, I heard you were looking for another job,
我想劝你留下来 and I was gonna convince you to stay.
下午好 这里是安德鲁·莱斯利办公室 Good afternoon, Andrew Lesley's office.
请稍等 Please hold.
-你好 我们 -肖恩和贝佛利夫妇 - Hello, we're-- - Sean and Beverly Lincoln.
我们一直在等你们来 We've been expecting you.
安德鲁 他们来了 Andrew, they're here.
我的天哪 Oh, my God.
你们居然来我办公室了 Look at you! In my office!
我的启蒙导师啊 My mentors!
Yenz 我是不是一直都在提他们 Yenz, how much do I talk about these two?
-是的 -一直都在提 - All the time. - All the time.
我们也经常提到你 Well, we talk about you a fair bit too.
快进来 快进来 Come in, come in, come in, come in,
请坐 请坐 Sit, sit, sit.
让你们坐这沙发真是抱歉 是临时的 I apologize for the sofa. It's temporary.
我定的那套一直都没送来 The one I ordered is taking forever.
得去找麻烦 Heads will roll.
小心沙发上的麻烦 Oh, look out for the heads.
没问题 All right.
来 Here we go.
-我的天 -没有这个必要的 - Oh, my God. - You didn't have to--
没事 我们每天都这样 Please, we do it every day.
-是你自己的吗 -别生气 - Are these yours? - Don't be mad.
你去买一些就好了嘛 You can just buy them.
我知道 不过你喜欢我做的啊 I know, but you like them.
你自己烤的 You baked these?
他自己烤的 He baked these.
我跟他说过不用自己烤的 橙子酱要吗 I told him he doesn't have to. Marmalade?
我真是太荣幸了 This is such a treat.
对了还有 你们的剧不错啊 Oh, by the way, bravo on the show.
我们之前听说你们已经给砍了 We heard you were cancelled.
现在又没砍 Now you're not.
《冰球小子》继续 More episodes of Pucks!
实际上 我们就是为了这事来的 Actually, uh, that's why we're here.
不论官方怎么说 Whatever they're saying officially,
我们的戏肯定是结束了 our show is definitely over.
不是吧 No!
我以为他们又预订了六集 I thought they ordered six more.
是这样 不过这只是为了 They did, but it was just a ploy
让马特不能来拍你的戏 to keep Matt from doing your show.
那些混蛋 Those buggers.
看来我比我自己以为的要重要 Guess I'm more important than I thought.
可能吧 I guess.
主要的问题是 Anyway, the point is,
我们的戏已经完了 我们希望能说明白 since our show is dead, we wanted to put it out there--
尴尬了 Awkward!
我还没开始雇编剧呢 I haven't even started hiring writers yet.
什么 What?
你们知道 我认为你们都很有才华 You know I think you're both beyond brilliant.
只是我觉得不是特别搭 It's just not quite the right fit.
不不不 No, no--
我是想找一些比较年轻的 I'm just going for something a bit younger.
我们不是来找工作的 We're not here looking for work.
随你们怎么说吧 Whatever you say.
我们事实上有一部戏 Actually, we have a show
现在三家电视台争着要 that three networks are competing for.
那可不 I'm sure you do.
我们是代表马特来的 We're here on Matt's behalf.
他觉得你应该知道 He felt it was important that you know
《冰球小子》是真正结束了 Pucks! is really finished,
希望你能再考虑一下让他出演 so you might reconsider him for the part.
这不可能 Yeah, that won't happen.
除非他从法律上已经没有任何约束了 Unless he's legally free and clear,
否则电视台都不会冒这个险 the network will never go for it.
还有 我悄悄告诉你们 And, uh, just between us,
我觉得我们还可以找到更好的 I think we can do better.
柠檬酪要吗 Lemon curd?
见到你们真是太高兴了 It was so lovely to meet you.
-拿点司康路上吃吧 -不用了 - Scones for the road? - No, thank you.
行啊 Yeah, fine.
你被炒了 You're fired.
我什么 I'm what?
没什么 Nothing.
儿子踢得怎么样 How's our guy doing?
还跟那站着呢 Well, he's still standing.
可不像贝克汉姆 He's no Beckham.
连贝嫂都比他强 Not even Victoria.
-奥利呢 -上班 - Where's Ollie? - Work.
什么时候结啊 So when's the big day?
你着什么急 又不请你 What do you care? You're not invited.
真的 我还想把你亲手交给他呢 Really? I was kind of hoping to give you away.
他是不是跑错方向了 Is he running in the wrong direction?
好歹也是在锻炼身体吧 Well, at least he's getting exercise.
日子定了没有 So, uh, you guys set a date yet?
我就问问 为你高兴呢 Just asking. I'm excited for you.
没有定日子 该来的就会来 No, no date. If it happens, it happens.
这是什么意思 What does that mean?
意思是 It means...
有可能没这天了 it might not happen.
你说啥 What?
迈克尔 宝贝 站起来 Michael! Honey, stand up!
你会绊倒人家的 Someone's gonna trip on you!
你说没这天是什么意思 What do you mean it might not happen?
最近我感觉 这可能不是个好主意 Lately it just isn't feeling like such a great idea.
发什么神经 你可得跟他结婚 That's crazy. You gotta marry him.
那可是奥利 It's--it's Ollie!
你都没见过他 You never even met him.
我知道 不过你说他人挺好的啊 I know, but you said he's such a great guy.
他是挺好的 不过他也有毛病 He is, but he's got issues.
什么毛病 What kind of issues?
比如很凶 有时候挺刻薄的 Like hostility issues. He can be mean.
刻薄算啥 谁不刻薄 Mean. Who isn't mean?
你也刻薄 我也刻薄 算个啥 You're mean, I'm mean. Come on.
我可没开玩笑 I'm talking mean.
有时候会特别愤怒 Sometimes there's a lot of rage there.
什么叫愤怒 Define rage.
你这是在干什么 What are you doing?
我不想让你丢掉一段美好的感情 I don't want you to throw away something good.
如果那人偶尔有虐待倾向呢 Even if he's sometimes abusive?
怎么虐待倾向了 What kind of abusive?
倒也不是身体上的 不过 Well, not physically, but--
那这说的不是废话吗 Then what are we even talking about?
你让她跟那个容易愤怒的男人和好 You told her to go back to the man with the rage?
只是偶尔愤怒 Sometimes rage.
先不说戴安 Okay, forget Diane.
你难道真希望你的孩子 Do you really want your children growing up
在这种不快乐的家庭环境 in this potentially unhappy situation
跟这个暴力倾向的男人长大 with this abusive man?
确实能省很大一笔钱 The savings are significant.
为了钱你就愿意让孩子 For which you're prepared to consign them
陷入痛苦的童年之中 to a miserable childhood?
不就童年吗 很快就过去了 It's childhood. It's over before you know it.
你压根就不该生小孩 You should never have been given sperm.
我知道你不能用金钱 Look, obviously you can't put a price
来衡量孩子的幸福 on your children's happiness,
但事实证明是可以的 but it turns out you can.
他们给我做了一张表 They showed me a spreadsheet.
不谈了 I'm out.
猜我们今天见了谁 Oh, guess who we saw today
自以为是又很傲娇的那位 in all his unrelenting smarminess.
你们见了安德鲁 莱斯利 You saw Andrew Lesley?
-然后呢 -没希望了 - And? - It's never gonna happen.
什么 What?
只要你跟我们这戏还有法定合约 As long as you're legally contracted to our show,
他们就不可能给你这个角色 they're never gonna give you the part.
法定 "Legally."
那是个什么意思 What does that even mean?
法律可强制执行 Uh, enforceable by law.
这很难跟你争论 That is hard to argue with.
这是什么 What's this?
我从葡萄园给你们带了点谢礼 I brought you a little thank-you gift from my vineyard,
虽然我看也没什么可感谢的 even though it turns out there's nothing to thank you for.
勒布朗白 "LeBlanc de Blanc"?
我估计这酒味道不会很复杂 I'm guessing it's not a very complex wine.
你干吗还要费那事 Why are you even bothering to meet
去跟其他几家电视台会面 with those other networks?
因为很有可能 Because in all likelihood,
我们不会把这个戏给你们 we're not giving our show to yours.
为什么 你必须得给我们 What? You have to give it to us.
那是为什么呢 Because why?
因为这个 What about this?
根据以往经验来看 Yeah, that hasn't exactly paid big dividends
这在工作上不是什么好事 on a professional level.
那如果我的新老板知道以后会怎么看我 Okay, how is it going to look to my new boss
我最好的朋友把她的戏给了别人 if my best friend gives her show to someone else?
我是你最好的朋友 I'm your best friend?
大概算吧 Well, probably.
你最好的朋友是谁 Who's your best friend?
我没有最好的朋友 又不是七岁小孩 I don't have a best friend because I'm not seven.
你有时候真的很伤人 You can be very hurtful.
等着瞧吧 You'll see.
瞧什么 I'll see what?
你会把戏给我们的 You're gonna give us that show.
因为你们把上一部拍的特别好是吗 Because you did such a bang-up job with our last show?
不是 因为海伦很厉害 No, because Helen's amazing.
她是我合作过的老板中最棒的 She's the best executive I've ever worked with.
你该知道跟她比的都是些什么人吧 You realize how low the bar is?
我知道 我知道 I do, yes. I do.
他们准备好了吗 Are they ready?
小伙子们快把东西拿好 爸爸来了 Guys, come get your stuff. Daddy's here!
别忘了艾登今天下午还有那个 Uh, don't forget Aiden's got that,
什么玩意来着那个事 uh, whatchamacallit this afternoon.
知道了 Oh, right.
你在干嘛 What are you doing?
你也要吃吗 Oh, you want some?
不用 No.
这些是他的维他命 是儿童维他命 They're his vitamins. They're children's vitamins.
好吃呀 Really good.
你跟奥利怎么样了 So, uh, where are we with Ollie?
你没事吧 又说奥利 Seriously? Again with Ollie?
对不起 我关心了 I'm sorry, I'm invested.
那么... So--
结束了 It's over.
结...什么... Ov--wh--
你说结束了什么意思 What do you mean over?
我不想谈了 I don't want to talk about it.
但我们不是说好要给他个机会嘛 But we decided you were gonna give it a chance.
给过机会了 孩子们 I gave it a chance. Boys!
行 还是因为虐待倾向那事吗 Okay, is this still about the abusive thing?
你别介意 因为有时候你的期望 'Cause, no offense, sometimes your expectations
有点不太实际 can be a little unrealistic.
艾登 迈克尔 快点 Aiden, Michael, move it!
我要被你们爸爸气死了 Your father's starting to piss me off.
就这样了 就这么结束了 So that's it? It's just--just over?
对 结束了 Yeah. Over.
天啊 Oh, Jesus.
你眼睛里那是泪吗 Are those tears in your eyes?
太让人难过了 This is very upsetting.
你们好 抱歉我迟到了 Hi, guys. So sorry I'm late.
你还好吗 头怎么了 Are you all right? What happened to your head?
没事 就是从办公桌上摔下来了 Oh, it's fine. I just fell off my desk.
人到齐了的话 可以开始了 If everybody's here, they're ready.
太好了 您先请 Great. After you.
我们好爱这部戏 We love this show.
-您过奖了 -谢谢 - Oh, that's very kind. - Oh, thank you.
有趣 又聪明 It's funny. It's clever.
一眼就看出来是英国人写的 You can totally tell that English people wrote it.
你们怎么那么聪明 Everything you all do is so smart.
可你们还是喜欢美国 And yet you felt you needed your own country.
可不是 Exactly.
但我们就有一个问题 One question we do have though,
双重身份 所有演员都演两个角色 the doubling, where all the actors play two parts...
问题在哪 It's not quite a question yet.
你已经定下来了吗 Are you married to that?
圆满愉快 Happily.
对 如果没有双重身份 Yeah, without the doubling,
这个剧就仅仅是关于两个家庭了 it's really just a show about two families.
最大特色就是双重身份 The doubling's what makes it distinctive.
还是噱头 Or...gimmicky?
我坚持它是特色 I'm gonna stick with distinctive,
但我死都不会忘记噱头这俩字的 but I'll go to my grave remembering gimmicky.
我们爱死它了 太美味了 We love this. It's yummy.
秀色可餐 我都想一口吃了它 It's delicious. I want to eat it.
就是那么可口 It's that delicious.
-谢谢 -祝你好胃口 - Oh, thank you. - Bon appetit.
里面有好多超赞的角色 There are some great parts in here.
我们肯定能打动很多大牌 I think we can attract some major talent.
事实上根据我们拍《冰球小子》的经验 Actually, um, after our experience on Pucks!,
我们并不倾向于找大牌明星 we're not really keen on going with big names.
懂你 绝对理解 Got it. Totally hear you.
但假如说我们找一个 比如说 But say we could get someone like, I don't know,
安东尼·霍普金斯演父亲[超大牌] Anthony Hopkins for the father...
不错 但他也是个大牌 Uh, right, but he would be a big name.
当然不是说他 不是说他本人 No, of course. I don't mean him per se.
我说的是安东尼·霍普金斯那型的 I'm talking about an Anthony Hopkins type.
那不错 Oh, well, that would be fine.
比如说唐纳德·萨瑟兰 Like Donald Sutherland.
冯小刚的大腕就是讲此人 最近出演饥饿游戏中斯诺总统
这还是 大明星 Again, that's a big name.
懂你 我跟你想的一样 Gotcha. I'm with you.
我只是说唐纳德·萨瑟兰那个款的 I--I just mean someone Donald Sutherland-esque.
-行 -比如克里斯托弗·普卢默 - Okay. - Like Christopher Plummer.
音乐之声男主角
-这也还是 -对对 - Again-- - Yeah, yeah.
你懂我的意思 You know what I mean.
我们都懂 I think we do.
好的 写的太棒了 All right, so this is fantastic.
非常成熟又幽默 It's sophisticated and hilarious,
你这一天估计都在听这些话 and you've been hearing that stuff all day long.
但还没听腻 But not yet tired of it.
给智慧一个大夸赞 Well, kudos on being brilliant.
现在 你们有什么想问我们 Now, what questions do you have for us?
我们不知道还能反过来问 We didn't know it could go that way.
新鲜 Refreshing!
我们有什么问题吗 Do we have any questions?
好的 Uh, okay.
有建议说我们应该 It's been suggested that we might want
取消双重身份 to eliminate the doubling.
为什么 我爱双重身份 Why? I love the doubling.
双重身份才是关键 The doubling is the key.
否则这个剧就只是两个家庭而已 Otherwise it's just a show about two families.
就是 Exactly.
对选角有建议吗 Uh, any thoughts on casting?
我跟他们说了 I already told these guys
我把剧本给苏珊·萨兰登看过了 I showed the script to Susan Sarandon,
老戏骨 电影《云图》里饰演四个角色
她非常看好 who was very hot on it.
我提了戈尔迪·霍恩 I mentioned Goldie Hawn,
奥斯卡最佳女配
但她已经不是我客户了 although she's no longer a client,
所以我们可以找更好的 so I think we can do better.
听着 你们想找谁都可以 Look, we'll do whatever you want,
但你们是已经定下来要找大明星吗 but are you dead set on going with big names?
不一定 Uh, no.
我感觉是 剧本这么棒 I feel like, with a script this strong,
何必借明星的光呢 you don't need names.
你看近二十年以来 I mean, if you look at just about any big comedy
成功的喜剧中 from the last 20 years,
最初都是找非常优秀的演员 they started out with really good actors
然后把他们打造成明星 and made them stars,
而不是反过来 not the other way around.
有意思 Interesting.
反正如果剧火起来 And if the show's a hit,
最后片酬都会那么高 you'll end up paying them just as much,
人也耍起大牌 何必一开始就遭罪呢 and they'll wind up just as crazy, so why start there?
这就是你们的明星 This is your star.
看你那一脸洋洋得意 Look at you, all smug.
不是得意 是高兴 Not smug, happy.
好吧 八成高兴 两成得意 All right, 80% happy, 20% smug,
余下一点额外的洋洋 with a little extra smug in reserve.
得了吧 她超赞的 Oh, come on, she's fantastic.
她多聪明啊 There's nothing remotely fuck wit about her.
我说对了吧 她很棒 有没有 So, was I right? She's great, right?
她令人印象深刻 She's very impressive.
然后 And?
然后她完全理解这部剧的优点在哪 And she clearly gets what's good about the show.
所以 So?
对比今天我们见过的其他笨蛋来说 Well, compared to the other idiots we met today,
她有绝对优势 she's obviously head and shoulders--
天妈呀 赶紧告诉我你准备把剧给我们 Oh, Jesus, just tell me we're getting the fucking show.
我非常担心 I have grave misgivings,
这可能是个大错 it's probably a huge mistake,
我肯定到时候会非常后悔这个决定 and I'm sure there'll come a day when I regret this.
所以你答应了 So it's a yes!
Jose Hey, Jose.
你知道我很看好你 You know I think you're fantastic,
而且这事不是因为你 and this has got nothing to do with you.
这沙滩是多 I mean, this beach is--
不幸的是关于财务方面 But unfortunately I'm having to make
我要做一些艰难的决定 some tough financial decisions.
我不知道你看没看过财经新闻 I don't know if you saw the trades,
反正是出了个丑闻 but there's been a whole scandal.
我的经理人把我坑惨了 然后 My business manager totally fucked me over, and--
你也猜得到 噩梦一样 well, you can imagine, it's been a nightmare.
他们想让我把飞机卖了 They want me to sell my plane.
简直不可能嘛 I mean, that's not gonna happen.
总得有底线吧 You got to draw a line somewhere.
遗憾的是 我必须减少一些支出 But sadly I do have to make some cutbacks.
所以我想感谢你十八年来的工作 So I wanted to thank you for 18 years.
我也不敢相信 但今天就是最后一天了 I can't believe it, but today needs to be our last day.
你就把那边的 If you could just grab
海草什么的收拾走 that little bit of seaweed shit over there,
就可以了 I think we're good.
还有我不知道这耙子是你的还是我的 Also, I actually don't know if that's your rake or my rake,
这就送你了 but by all means
还是要谢谢你 and again, thank you.
那边还有个死海鸥 Oh, there's part of a dead seagull over there.
麻烦你一起收拾走 好吧 If you could just grab that, that'd be great, yeah?