翻譯：持久 小肚腩
翻譯：別扭大菜 NANA
校對：NANA小霸王
時間軸：濃子
后期：魚骨頭 總監：NANA小霸王
前情提要
你們看什么呢 What are you guys staring at?
在看安德魯·萊斯利那個小賤人 That dick whistle Andrew Lesley.
安德魯·萊斯利也來了 Andrew Lesley's here?
我一直沒機會跟你說我很喜歡你的劇本 I didn't get a chance to tell you I loved your script.
才沒有 You did not.
-真是個混蛋 -哪一個 - What an asshole. - Which one?
隨便選 Take your pick.
這家電視臺從來沒有讓女人擔任過這職位 This network has never had a woman in that job.
你不覺得這會... Don't you think it would--
你覺得海倫·拜什怎么樣 What about Helen Basch?
她表現的若無其事 但是拜托 She acts like nothing happened, but come on.
我毀了她的婚姻 I broke up her marriage.
她怎么可能讓我當她的副手 You think she's gonna want me as her number two?
打給你的經紀人 Call your agent.
賣劇本 掙大錢 Sell your show. Make the money.
我很抱歉 I'm sorry.
聯邦調查局在調查 The FBI's been investigating him
他竊取客戶資產的事 for stealing money from his clients.
-拉里 -你在他那放了多少錢 - Larry? - How much do you have with him?
什么多少錢 是所有錢 What do you mean how much? All of it.
-糟糕 -挨千刀的王八羔子 - Oh, shit. - Motherfucking son of a bitch.
-愿他安息 -你跟誰是一伙的 - May he rest in peace. - Whose side are you on?
戲里戲外 第四季 第二集
親愛的 是我貝絲 吵醒你了嗎 Hi, honey, it's Beth. Did I wake you?
好的 聽我說 Okay, listen.
我快被打來的評論電話淹沒了 I've been getting tons of calls for a comment.
關于什么的 About what?
資金竊取的事 The money thing.
什么 The what?
資金竊取的事 The money thing.
拉里·彭策爾 竊取你的資金 Larry Penzel? Stealing your money?
天哪 對了 Oh, Jesus, right.
該死 Oh, fuck me.
我替你寫了一個簡短的聲明 Okay, so I've written a short statement for you.
我只是想跟你確認一下看你是不是認可 I just want to make sure you're comfortable with it.
“17年來 "For 17 years,
“拉里·彭策爾一直是我的投資經理人 Larry Penzel was my business manager
“和生活中的朋友” and personal friend."
臭不要臉的 Evil sack of shit.
“我可以證實他從我這兒 "I can confirm that he misappropriated
“竊取了一大筆資金” a substantial amount of money from me."
祝他在地獄里被輪奸 Hope they're raping him in hell.
“然而 還有其他受害者 "However, there are other victims of his fraud
“損失遠比我還要多” who lost much more than I did."
是真的嗎 Is that true?
我不知道 I don't know.
“我向彭策爾先生的遺孀及孩子們深表同情” "My sympathies go out to Mr. Penzel's widow and children."
不 才不同情 No, they don't.
“她們的損失遠比我多得多” "Their loss is much greater than mine."
-瞎扯 -有其他意見嗎 - Bullshit. - Any other thoughts?
我希望他能起死回生 I hope he comes back to life,
得個屁癌 然后再死一回 gets ass cancer, and dies again.
好吧 我再過一遍 All right, let me give it another pass.
不 Oh, no.
怎么 What?
-你說怎么 -又不完全一樣 - "What?" - They're not the same.
他們自己都分不清誰是誰 Another checked shirt couldn't tell them apart.
艾琳 你好 Eileen. Hello?
伙計們 你們在一塊兒嗎 Hi, guys, are you two together?
簡直了 You have no idea.
要匯報的可多了 So, lots to report.
我把所有電視臺的會面都排在周五了 I set up all our network meetings for Friday.
我想我們可以連著一路見過來 I figure we'll do them in a row, bang, bang, bang,
然后吃個午飯 溝通一下 and then go for lunch and see where we are.
聽這計劃不錯 Sounds like a plan.
好的 周五見 Okay, see you Friday!
大家都想簽你們 一定會很有意思的 Everybody wants you. This is gonna be so fun!
-拜 -謝謝你 - Bye. - Thank you.
怎么 What?
你真的還想再遭這種罪嗎 You really want to go through this again?
就我們現在的經濟狀況 不去就太蠢了 Financially I think we'd be foolish not to.
這回也許會不一樣 你也說不準 It might be different this time. You don't know.
親愛的 怎么可能會不同呢 Darling, why on earth would it be different?
至少聽聽他們會說些什么 Let's at least hear what they have to say.
他們說什么無關緊要 It doesn't matter what they say.
他們說的肯定都是我們想聽的 They'll say whatever we want to hear.
他們總不可能全都是狡猾的賤人 Look, they can't all be devious fuckwits.
當然可能了 Yes, they can!
那這樣呢 我們去會面 Okay, how about this? We take the meetings.
然后拒絕他們 And shove them?
如果我們能找到一家我們都覺得 If we can find one that we both agree
不會毀掉劇本主旨的電視臺 won't crush our souls,
那我們就考慮做這個劇 then we'll consider doing the show.
否則就讓劇本繼續在抽屜里待著 Otherwise, back in the drawer it goes.
-那就賭一把 -謝謝你 - I'll take those odds. - Thank you.
我更喜歡剛剛那件衣服 I liked the other shirt better.
我知道 I know.
你穿著呢 You're wearing it.
有多糟 How bad is it?
一方面 即使資金遭到竊取 Well, on one hand, even with the embezzlement,
你仍然是個有錢人 you're still a wealthy man.
那另一方面呢 And the other hand?
看看這個 Take a look at this.
你要是按現在的花銷水平繼續下去 If you maintain your current rate of spending,
到這一年你就會花光所有的錢 you'll run out of money by the time you get here.
2019年 2019?
去他媽的另一方面 Fucking other hand.
問題在你幾乎沒有現金 The problem is you have virtually no cash.
都困在非流動資產上了 Everything's tied up in non-liquid assets:
房產 汽車 一顆恐龍蛋 Real estate, automobiles, a dinosaur egg?
沒錯 可棒了 Yeah, it's pretty awesome.
有這么大 上面都是斑點 It's, like, this big with spots on it and--
我們需要做的是 What we need to do
把其中一部分轉為創收資產 is convert some of that to income-generating capital.
什么意思 賣家產 Meaning what, sell shit?
沒錯 Right.
我們還需要做的是 What we also need to do
減少你的花銷 is look at reducing your expenses.
顯然有些是不可避免的固定支出 Obviously there are fixed costs that are unavoidable.
保險 醫療 Insurance, medical,
你父親公寓的房貸 the mortgage on your father's condo.
那個倒是還可以商量 Um, that one's not in stone.
你準備好要驅逐你的父親 You're prepared to evict your father?
我是說就把這個留作后手 I'm just saying let's keep it in our back pocket.
好吧 孩子的撫養費 贍養費 All right. Uh, child support, alimony--
那個實際上也不需要了 Actually, that one's going away.
我前妻就要再婚了 My ex-wife's getting remarried.
那可真是省了一大筆 Well, that's a sizable saving.
恭喜啊 Congratulations.
知道是什么時候嗎 Do we know when that's happening?
不知道 但我可以問問 No, but I can find out.
把這一項去掉會是一個很大的幫助 Taking that off the books will be a big help, big.
看見沒 也并非全是另一方面 See? It's not all the other hand.
這還只是開始 It's a start.
我們還得跟你談談你的一些 We also need to talk about some of your more, uh,
自由支出 discretionary expenses.
Jose Padilla是誰 Who is Jose Padilla?
幫我打掃海灘的 He's the guy who sweeps my beach.
如果他不打掃了呢 And if he didn't?
那誰來打掃 Who's gonna do it?
對 這就是可能需要削減的支出 See, that's the kind of thing we may need to eliminate.
有點過激了吧 Wow, that seems pretty drastic.
我們再考慮考慮 Well, let's think about it.
還有一個葡萄園 All right, um, there's the vineyard.
不 不 那可是有收入的 No, no. No, that's income-producing.
我釀的酒賺了不少錢 I make money on the wine.
事實上 亞倫算了算 Actually, Aaron ran the numbers.
你在葡萄園運作上的花銷 For what you're spending to operate the vineyard--
新設備 保險 員工薪水 new equipment, insurance, salaries--
算下來一瓶的成本是1100美元 it's actually costing you about $1,100 a bottle.
我不能把葡萄園賣了 I-I can't sell the vineyard.
首先 我的名字可是印在酒瓶上的 First of all, my name is on the label.
此外我還花了 Plus I got, like,
一萬五千塊印的運動衫 T恤 帽子 $15,000 worth of sweatshirts and T-shirts
印著我的商標呢 and hats with my logo on it.
不 不賣 No, not selling it.
沒得商量 It's off the table.
好吧 那架飛機呢 All right, there's the plane.
-不行 -那可是相當大的... - No. - It's a huge--
不 飛機也沒得商量 No, the plane is off the table.
-可是 -下一個 - But-- - Move on.
我想我們應該討論一下汽車收藏 I think we should discuss the possibility
變現的可能性 of liquidating the car collection.
滾 Fuck you.
好吧 Okay.
所以也沒得商量嗎 So that's not on the table?
想都別想 Not even near the table.
但你打算趕走你父親 But you're prepared to evict your father?
我的車又不是混蛋 Not one of those cars is an asshole.
我們繼續 Let's keep going.
我們查到您花了12萬6千 We're showing you spent $126,000
黑手黨頭目
買了一瓶阿爾·卡彭曾經收藏過的白蘭地 on a single bottle of Brandy once owned by Al Capone?
算是歷史文物嘛 A little piece of history.
那你舍不舍得賣了它呢 Can you see yourself parting with it?
我已經喝了 I drank it.
當時我喝醉了 酒就擺在那 I was drunk. It was there.
有腦子的人都知道這簡直難以抗拒 As a business decision, it's hard to defend.
不好說啊 I don't know.
完全沒有共鳴 This did nothing for me.
我也是 感覺與我們的生活不貼切 I agree. It just doesn't feel like us.
-我挺喜歡的 -真的嗎 - I liked it. - Really?
我挺喜歡主角之間的關系設定 I like the relationships between the characters.
我喜歡動作喜劇 給人煥然一新的感覺 I like the physical comedy. It feels fresh.
但我們真的要拍一部木偶劇嗎 But do we really want to do a show with puppets?
木偶 Puppets?
海倫·拜什來見你了 Uh, Helen Basch is here to see you?
海倫來了 天吶 快讓她進來 Helen's here? Oh, my God, send her in.
“我打擾你們了嗎” "Am I interrupting?"
我這顯然是打擾了 Said the woman who's clearly interrupting.
沒事進來吧 隨意打擾 Please, interrupt away.
我來介紹下 So, introductions.
不用說 這位就是海倫·拜什 Obviously, Helen Basch.
這是安迪·巴頓 Andy Button.
你好 能給我加薪嗎 Hi, can I have a raise?
太早了吧 現在就提 Too soon?
這位是麥拉·李赫特 And Myra Licht.
其實我和麥拉去年就在阿斯彭喜劇節見過了 Actually, Myra and I met last year at the Aspen Comedy Festival.
好吧 Okay.
瞧瞧你現在呀 你... And now look at you. You're--
咋了 What?
們要一起共事了 Going to be working together.
沒錯 等不及了 特別激動 Yes, can't wait. So excited.
你的員工都很棒呀 You got quite the crew here.
這樣吧 你們讓我倆單獨聊聊 All righty, how about you guys give us a few minutes?
很高興見到你 加薪什么的真是我開玩笑 So nice meeting you. Totally kidding about the raise.
基本算是 Sort of.
我們待會再見 I'll see you both soon.
拜拜 Bye-bye.
天吶 我還以為她... Oh, my God. I totally thought she was--
她從沒提過 我們也不敢問 She's never said, and we're all afraid to ask.
肯定有什么不對勁 Well, something's going on in there.
她要不是懷了孩子 那就是吃了一個 If she's not having one, she definitely ate one.
快請坐吧 So, sit, sit, sit.
我們都很激動能請到您 We are all so thrilled you are here.
謝謝 Thank you.
是這樣 我必須先把一些事說清楚 All right, look, I need to get this out of the way.
咱們還是別裝啥事沒有了 Can we talk about the elephant in the room?
當然 Oh, sure.
早知道我該做做準備 I wish I'd brought peanuts.
在你說之前 我要鄭重道歉 Okay, before you say anything, I am so sorry.
要是世界上有后悔藥的話 我肯定買 If I could go back in time and undo it, I would.
沒有任何借口 There is no excuse.
我當時年輕 還很幼稚 I was young. I was naive.
好吧 這就是兩個借口了 Okay, those are both excuses.
但那是我第一份正經工作 But it was my first real job.
他很強勢 還能振奮人心 He was powerful and exciting,
你壓根不知道我到底在說什么 and you have no idea what I'm talking about.
不知道 Nope.
到底是有多少事要談 How many elephants are in here?
-早上好 -早 - Morning. - Morning.
稍等 One sec.
你來干什么呀 What are you doing here?
馬特·勒布朗來找你們了 Matt LeBlanc is here to see you.
多謝提前告知 Thanks for the heads up.
提什么 The what?
是什么風把你刮來了 So, to what do we owe the pleasure
還是你又是來讓我們開眼界的 or whatever it is we're about to experience?
我們也很想邀請你坐下 但是 We'd offer you a seat, but, um--
是啊 你們那破沙發哪去了 Yeah, what happened to your shitty couch?
我們只知道從倫敦回來沙發就不見了 We know when we came back from London, it was gone,
隨便找個箱子坐吧 so, uh, pull up a box.
有啥事嗎 What's up?
我需要幫助 I kind of need a favor.
-不行 -要不先讓他說完吧 - No. - Maybe let him ask first?
謝謝 Thank you.
好吧 幫啥忙 Fine. What?
我想讓你們找安德魯·萊斯利談談 I need you to talk to Andrew Lesley.
-去你的 -想都別想 - Fuck off. - No way.
他不肯讓我參演他的試播集 Look, he won't let me do his pilot
因為他覺得我還在演我們這狗屎玩意 'cause he thinks I'm still doing our piece of crap.
多謝夸獎 Oh, thank you.
你得告訴他我們這個已經掛了 You got to convince him ours is dead.
他會聽你們的 你們以前認識的 He'll listen to you guys. You got the history.
不行 想都別想 No, forget it.
我們是不可能和那個自以為是 There is no way we are speaking
表里不一 屁話連篇的圍巾男說話的 to that smug, duplicitous, talking scarf.
我本來想說“除非豬從你屁眼飛出來” I was about to say "when pigs fly out of your ass",
但我見過你吃的啥 想著也不是沒可能 but I've seen what you eat, so it's not an impossibility.
求你們了嘛 我已經走投無路了 Come on! I'm desperate here.
他們都想讓我賣了葡萄園 They want me to sell my vineyard!
你居然有葡萄園 You have a vineyard?
我沒送過你們葡萄酒嗎 I never gave you a bottle?
-沒 -沒有 - No. - No.
我馬上就給你們一瓶 Well, you are definitely getting a bottle
還有運動衫 還有帽子 and a sweatshirt and a hat.
我太激動了 I'm excited.
如果你真的急需用錢 If you need money so badly,
為什么不把飛機賣了 why don't you just sell your plane?
飛機沒得商量 The plane is off the table!
我需要接戲工作 What I need is work.
我知道我的請求很無理 Look, I realize what I'm asking,
但只需要花你們幾分鐘時間 but it's a few minutes of your time,
就能挽回我的人生啊 求你們了 and it would mean everything to me, come on.
好吧 我們會打電話的 Fine, we'll call him.
你們得當面說 You got to do it in person.
-去你的 -當面 門都沒有 - Fuck off. - In person? No fucking way.
我的經紀人和經理都打過電話 My agent called him. My manager called him.
打電話是根本行不通的 It's not gonna work over the phone.
必須得面對面說 It's got to be face-to-face.
-沒門 -去你的 - No. - Fuck off.
要是你幫我這個忙 If you do this for me,
我就帶你去金球獎贊助商展示活動 I will take you to a Golden Globes gifting suite.
再多說點 Say more.
等等 Wait, wait.
所以不是你要求他和我分手的嗎 So you didn't make him break up with me?
我壓根都不知道他找小三了 I didn't even know there was a you.
所以也不是你要求他開除我的嗎 And you didn't make him fire me?
要是我知道的話我可能會這么做 I probably would have if I'd known.
這么說能讓你感覺好點嗎 Does that help?
所以說他干的那些事 So he did all that
都只是為了不想再跟我交往 just to stop seeing me?
我的天哪 Oh, my God!
我知道你愛過他 Look, I get that you loved him,
我也知道你很難接受 and I know this is hard to hear,
但愛德就是個情緒易怒 but Ed was an emotionally stunted,
滿口謊言的臭傻逼 compulsively lying, evil sack of shit.
他人看著真的很好啊 He seemed so nice.
至少你逃脫了 我還在付他贍養費呢 Hey, at least you got out. I'm still paying him alimony.
我能問你個問題嗎 Can I ask you something?
你想談的事是什么 Uh, what was your elephant?
我聽說你在另謀他職 Oh, I heard you were looking for another job,
我想勸你留下來 and I was gonna convince you to stay.
下午好 這里是安德魯·萊斯利辦公室 Good afternoon, Andrew Lesley's office.
請稍等 Please hold.
-你好 我們 -肖恩和貝佛利夫婦 - Hello, we're-- - Sean and Beverly Lincoln.
我們一直在等你們來 We've been expecting you.
安德魯 他們來了 Andrew, they're here.
我的天哪 Oh, my God.
你們居然來我辦公室了 Look at you! In my office!
我的啟蒙導師啊 My mentors!
Yenz 我是不是一直都在提他們 Yenz, how much do I talk about these two?
-是的 -一直都在提 - All the time. - All the time.
我們也經常提到你 Well, we talk about you a fair bit too.
快進來 快進來 Come in, come in, come in, come in,
請坐 請坐 Sit, sit, sit.
讓你們坐這沙發真是抱歉 是臨時的 I apologize for the sofa. It's temporary.
我定的那套一直都沒送來 The one I ordered is taking forever.
得去找麻煩 Heads will roll.
小心沙發上的麻煩 Oh, look out for the heads.
沒問題 All right.
來 Here we go.
-我的天 -沒有這個必要的 - Oh, my God. - You didn't have to--
沒事 我們每天都這樣 Please, we do it every day.
-是你自己的嗎 -別生氣 - Are these yours? - Don't be mad.
你去買一些就好了嘛 You can just buy them.
我知道 不過你喜歡我做的啊 I know, but you like them.
你自己烤的 You baked these?
他自己烤的 He baked these.
我跟他說過不用自己烤的 橙子醬要嗎 I told him he doesn't have to. Marmalade?
我真是太榮幸了 This is such a treat.
對了還有 你們的劇不錯啊 Oh, by the way, bravo on the show.
我們之前聽說你們已經給砍了 We heard you were cancelled.
現在又沒砍 Now you're not.
《冰球小子》繼續 More episodes of Pucks!
實際上 我們就是為了這事來的 Actually, uh, that's why we're here.
不論官方怎么說 Whatever they're saying officially,
我們的戲肯定是結束了 our show is definitely over.
不是吧 No!
我以為他們又預訂了六集 I thought they ordered six more.
是這樣 不過這只是為了 They did, but it was just a ploy
讓馬特不能來拍你的戲 to keep Matt from doing your show.
那些混蛋 Those buggers.
看來我比我自己以為的要重要 Guess I'm more important than I thought.
可能吧 I guess.
主要的問題是 Anyway, the point is,
我們的戲已經完了 我們希望能說明白 since our show is dead, we wanted to put it out there--
尷尬了 Awkward!
我還沒開始雇編劇呢 I haven't even started hiring writers yet.
什么 What?
你們知道 我認為你們都很有才華 You know I think you're both beyond brilliant.
只是我覺得不是特別搭 It's just not quite the right fit.
不不不 No, no--
我是想找一些比較年輕的 I'm just going for something a bit younger.
我們不是來找工作的 We're not here looking for work.
隨你們怎么說吧 Whatever you say.
我們事實上有一部戲 Actually, we have a show
現在三家電視臺爭著要 that three networks are competing for.
那可不 I'm sure you do.
我們是代表馬特來的 We're here on Matt's behalf.
他覺得你應該知道 He felt it was important that you know
《冰球小子》是真正結束了 Pucks! is really finished,
希望你能再考慮一下讓他出演 so you might reconsider him for the part.
這不可能 Yeah, that won't happen.
除非他從法律上已經沒有任何約束了 Unless he's legally free and clear,
否則電視臺都不會冒這個險 the network will never go for it.
還有 我悄悄告訴你們 And, uh, just between us,
我覺得我們還可以找到更好的 I think we can do better.
檸檬酪要嗎 Lemon curd?
見到你們真是太高興了 It was so lovely to meet you.
-拿點司康路上吃吧 -不用了 - Scones for the road? - No, thank you.
行啊 Yeah, fine.
你被炒了 You're fired.
我什么 I'm what?
沒什么 Nothing.
兒子踢得怎么樣 How's our guy doing?
還跟那站著呢 Well, he's still standing.
可不像貝克漢姆 He's no Beckham.
連貝嫂都比他強 Not even Victoria.
-奧利呢 -上班 - Where's Ollie? - Work.
什么時候結啊 So when's the big day?
你著什么急 又不請你 What do you care? You're not invited.
真的 我還想把你親手交給他呢 Really? I was kind of hoping to give you away.
他是不是跑錯方向了 Is he running in the wrong direction?
好歹也是在鍛煉身體吧 Well, at least he's getting exercise.
日子定了沒有 So, uh, you guys set a date yet?
我就問問 為你高興呢 Just asking. I'm excited for you.
沒有定日子 該來的就會來 No, no date. If it happens, it happens.
這是什么意思 What does that mean?
意思是 It means...
有可能沒這天了 it might not happen.
你說啥 What?
邁克爾 寶貝 站起來 Michael! Honey, stand up!
你會絆倒人家的 Someone's gonna trip on you!
你說沒這天是什么意思 What do you mean it might not happen?
最近我感覺 這可能不是個好主意 Lately it just isn't feeling like such a great idea.
發什么神經 你可得跟他結婚 That's crazy. You gotta marry him.
那可是奧利 It's--it's Ollie!
你都沒見過他 You never even met him.
我知道 不過你說他人挺好的啊 I know, but you said he's such a great guy.
他是挺好的 不過他也有毛病 He is, but he's got issues.
什么毛病 What kind of issues?
比如很兇 有時候挺刻薄的 Like hostility issues. He can be mean.
刻薄算啥 誰不刻薄 Mean. Who isn't mean?
你也刻薄 我也刻薄 算個啥 You're mean, I'm mean. Come on.
我可沒開玩笑 I'm talking mean.
有時候會特別憤怒 Sometimes there's a lot of rage there.
什么叫憤怒 Define rage.
你這是在干什么 What are you doing?
我不想讓你丟掉一段美好的感情 I don't want you to throw away something good.
如果那人偶爾有虐待傾向呢 Even if he's sometimes abusive?
怎么虐待傾向了 What kind of abusive?
倒也不是身體上的 不過 Well, not physically, but--
那這說的不是廢話嗎 Then what are we even talking about?
你讓她跟那個容易憤怒的男人和好 You told her to go back to the man with the rage?
只是偶爾憤怒 Sometimes rage.
先不說戴安 Okay, forget Diane.
你難道真希望你的孩子 Do you really want your children growing up
在這種不快樂的家庭環境 in this potentially unhappy situation
跟這個暴力傾向的男人長大 with this abusive man?
確實能省很大一筆錢 The savings are significant.
為了錢你就愿意讓孩子 For which you're prepared to consign them
陷入痛苦的童年之中 to a miserable childhood?
不就童年嗎 很快就過去了 It's childhood. It's over before you know it.
你壓根就不該生小孩 You should never have been given sperm.
我知道你不能用金錢 Look, obviously you can't put a price
來衡量孩子的幸福 on your children's happiness,
但事實證明是可以的 but it turns out you can.
他們給我做了一張表 They showed me a spreadsheet.
不談了 I'm out.
猜我們今天見了誰 Oh, guess who we saw today
自以為是又很傲嬌的那位 in all his unrelenting smarminess.
你們見了安德魯 萊斯利 You saw Andrew Lesley?
-然后呢 -沒希望了 - And? - It's never gonna happen.
什么 What?
只要你跟我們這戲還有法定合約 As long as you're legally contracted to our show,
他們就不可能給你這個角色 they're never gonna give you the part.
法定 "Legally."
那是個什么意思 What does that even mean?
法律可強制執行 Uh, enforceable by law.
這很難跟你爭論 That is hard to argue with.
這是什么 What's this?
我從葡萄園給你們帶了點謝禮 I brought you a little thank-you gift from my vineyard,
雖然我看也沒什么可感謝的 even though it turns out there's nothing to thank you for.
勒布朗白 "LeBlanc de Blanc"?
我估計這酒味道不會很復雜 I'm guessing it's not a very complex wine.
你干嗎還要費那事 Why are you even bothering to meet
去跟其他幾家電視臺會面 with those other networks?
因為很有可能 Because in all likelihood,
我們不會把這個戲給你們 we're not giving our show to yours.
為什么 你必須得給我們 What? You have to give it to us.
那是為什么呢 Because why?
因為這個 What about this?
根據以往經驗來看 Yeah, that hasn't exactly paid big dividends
這在工作上不是什么好事 on a professional level.
那如果我的新老板知道以后會怎么看我 Okay, how is it going to look to my new boss
我最好的朋友把她的戲給了別人 if my best friend gives her show to someone else?
我是你最好的朋友 I'm your best friend?
大概算吧 Well, probably.
你最好的朋友是誰 Who's your best friend?
我沒有最好的朋友 又不是七歲小孩 I don't have a best friend because I'm not seven.
你有時候真的很傷人 You can be very hurtful.
等著瞧吧 You'll see.
瞧什么 I'll see what?
你會把戲給我們的 You're gonna give us that show.
因為你們把上一部拍的特別好是嗎 Because you did such a bang-up job with our last show?
不是 因為海倫很厲害 No, because Helen's amazing.
她是我合作過的老板中最棒的 She's the best executive I've ever worked with.
你該知道跟她比的都是些什么人吧 You realize how low the bar is?
我知道 我知道 I do, yes. I do.
他們準備好了嗎 Are they ready?
小伙子們快把東西拿好 爸爸來了 Guys, come get your stuff. Daddy's here!
別忘了艾登今天下午還有那個 Uh, don't forget Aiden's got that,
什么玩意來著那個事 uh, whatchamacallit this afternoon.
知道了 Oh, right.
你在干嘛 What are you doing?
你也要吃嗎 Oh, you want some?
不用 No.
這些是他的維他命 是兒童維他命 They're his vitamins. They're children's vitamins.
好吃呀 Really good.
你跟奧利怎么樣了 So, uh, where are we with Ollie?
你沒事吧 又說奧利 Seriously? Again with Ollie?
對不起 我關心了 I'm sorry, I'm invested.
那么... So--
結束了 It's over.
結...什么... Ov--wh--
你說結束了什么意思 What do you mean over?
我不想談了 I don't want to talk about it.
但我們不是說好要給他個機會嘛 But we decided you were gonna give it a chance.
給過機會了 孩子們 I gave it a chance. Boys!
行 還是因為虐待傾向那事嗎 Okay, is this still about the abusive thing?
你別介意 因為有時候你的期望 'Cause, no offense, sometimes your expectations
有點不太實際 can be a little unrealistic.
艾登 邁克爾 快點 Aiden, Michael, move it!
我要被你們爸爸氣死了 Your father's starting to piss me off.
就這樣了 就這么結束了 So that's it? It's just--just over?
對 結束了 Yeah. Over.
天啊 Oh, Jesus.
你眼睛里那是淚嗎 Are those tears in your eyes?
太讓人難過了 This is very upsetting.
你們好 抱歉我遲到了 Hi, guys. So sorry I'm late.
你還好嗎 頭怎么了 Are you all right? What happened to your head?
沒事 就是從辦公桌上摔下來了 Oh, it's fine. I just fell off my desk.
人到齊了的話 可以開始了 If everybody's here, they're ready.
太好了 您先請 Great. After you.
我們好愛這部戲 We love this show.
-您過獎了 -謝謝 - Oh, that's very kind. - Oh, thank you.
有趣 又聰明 It's funny. It's clever.
一眼就看出來是英國人寫的 You can totally tell that English people wrote it.
你們怎么那么聰明 Everything you all do is so smart.
可你們還是喜歡美國 And yet you felt you needed your own country.
可不是 Exactly.
但我們就有一個問題 One question we do have though,
雙重身份 所有演員都演兩個角色 the doubling, where all the actors play two parts...
問題在哪 It's not quite a question yet.
你已經定下來了嗎 Are you married to that?
圓滿愉快 Happily.
對 如果沒有雙重身份 Yeah, without the doubling,
這個劇就僅僅是關于兩個家庭了 it's really just a show about two families.
最大特色就是雙重身份 The doubling's what makes it distinctive.
還是噱頭 Or...gimmicky?
我堅持它是特色 I'm gonna stick with distinctive,
但我死都不會忘記噱頭這倆字的 but I'll go to my grave remembering gimmicky.
我們愛死它了 太美味了 We love this. It's yummy.
秀色可餐 我都想一口吃了它 It's delicious. I want to eat it.
就是那么可口 It's that delicious.
-謝謝 -祝你好胃口 - Oh, thank you. - Bon appetit.
里面有好多超贊的角色 There are some great parts in here.
我們肯定能打動很多大牌 I think we can attract some major talent.
事實上根據我們拍《冰球小子》的經驗 Actually, um, after our experience on Pucks!,
我們并不傾向于找大牌明星 we're not really keen on going with big names.
懂你 絕對理解 Got it. Totally hear you.
但假如說我們找一個 比如說 But say we could get someone like, I don't know,
安東尼·霍普金斯演父親[超大牌] Anthony Hopkins for the father...
不錯 但他也是個大牌 Uh, right, but he would be a big name.
當然不是說他 不是說他本人 No, of course. I don't mean him per se.
我說的是安東尼·霍普金斯那型的 I'm talking about an Anthony Hopkins type.
那不錯 Oh, well, that would be fine.
比如說唐納德·薩瑟蘭 Like Donald Sutherland.
馮小剛的大腕就是講此人 最近出演饑餓游戲中斯諾總統
這還是 大明星 Again, that's a big name.
懂你 我跟你想的一樣 Gotcha. I'm with you.
我只是說唐納德·薩瑟蘭那個款的 I--I just mean someone Donald Sutherland-esque.
-行 -比如克里斯托弗·普盧默 - Okay. - Like Christopher Plummer.
音樂之聲男主角
-這也還是 -對對 - Again-- - Yeah, yeah.
你懂我的意思 You know what I mean.
我們都懂 I think we do.
好的 寫的太棒了 All right, so this is fantastic.
非常成熟又幽默 It's sophisticated and hilarious,
你這一天估計都在聽這些話 and you've been hearing that stuff all day long.
但還沒聽膩 But not yet tired of it.
給智慧一個大夸贊 Well, kudos on being brilliant.
現在 你們有什么想問我們 Now, what questions do you have for us?
我們不知道還能反過來問 We didn't know it could go that way.
新鮮 Refreshing!
我們有什么問題嗎 Do we have any questions?
好的 Uh, okay.
有建議說我們應該 It's been suggested that we might want
取消雙重身份 to eliminate the doubling.
為什么 我愛雙重身份 Why? I love the doubling.
雙重身份才是關鍵 The doubling is the key.
否則這個劇就只是兩個家庭而已 Otherwise it's just a show about two families.
就是 Exactly.
對選角有建議嗎 Uh, any thoughts on casting?
我跟他們說了 I already told these guys
我把劇本給蘇珊·薩蘭登看過了 I showed the script to Susan Sarandon,
她非常看好 who was very hot on it.
老戲骨 電影《云圖》里飾演四個角色
我提了戈爾迪·霍恩 I mentioned Goldie Hawn,
奧斯卡最佳女配
但她已經不是我客戶了 although she's no longer a client,
所以我們可以找更好的 so I think we can do better.
聽著 你們想找誰都可以 Look, we'll do whatever you want,
但你們是已經定下來要找大明星嗎 but are you dead set on going with big names?
不一定 Uh, no.
我感覺是 劇本這么棒 I feel like, with a script this strong,
何必借明星的光呢 you don't need names.
你看近二十年以來 I mean, if you look at just about any big comedy
成功的喜劇中 from the last 20 years,
最初都是找非常優秀的演員 they started out with really good actors
然后把他們打造成明星 and made them stars,
而不是反過來 not the other way around.
有意思 Interesting.
反正如果劇火起來 And if the show's a hit,
最后片酬都會那么高 you'll end up paying them just as much,
人也耍起大牌 何必一開始就遭罪呢 and they'll wind up just as crazy, so why start there?
這就是你們的明星 This is your star.
看你那一臉洋洋得意 Look at you, all smug.
不是得意 是高興 Not smug, happy.
好吧 八成高興 兩成得意 All right, 80% happy, 20% smug,
余下一點額外的洋洋 with a little extra smug in reserve.
得了吧 她超贊的 Oh, come on, she's fantastic.
她多聰明啊 There's nothing remotely fuck wit about her.
我說對了吧 她很棒 有沒有 So, was I right? She's great, right?
她令人印象深刻 She's very impressive.
然后 And?
然后她完全理解這部劇的優點在哪 And she clearly gets what's good about the show.
所以 So?
對比今天我們見過的其他笨蛋來說 Well, compared to the other idiots we met today,
她有絕對優勢 she's obviously head and shoulders--
天媽呀 趕緊告訴我你準備把劇給我們 Oh, Jesus, just tell me we're getting the fucking show.
我非常擔心 I have grave misgivings,
這可能是個大錯 it's probably a huge mistake,
我肯定到時候會非常后悔這個決定 and I'm sure there'll come a day when I regret this.
所以你答應了 So it's a yes!
Jose Hey, Jose.
你知道我很看好你 You know I think you're fantastic,
而且這事不是因為你 and this has got nothing to do with you.
這沙灘是多 I mean, this beach is--
不幸的是關于財務方面 But unfortunately I'm having to make
我要做一些艱難的決定 some tough financial decisions.
我不知道你看沒看過財經新聞 I don't know if you saw the trades,
反正是出了個丑聞 but there's been a whole scandal.
我的經理人把我坑慘了 然后 My business manager totally fucked me over, and--
你也猜得到 噩夢一樣 well, you can imagine, it's been a nightmare.
他們想讓我把飛機賣了 They want me to sell my plane.
簡直不可能嘛 I mean, that's not gonna happen.
總得有底線吧 You got to draw a line somewhere.
遺憾的是 我必須減少一些支出 But sadly I do have to make some cutbacks.
所以我想感謝你十八年來的工作 So I wanted to thank you for 18 years.
我也不敢相信 但今天就是最后一天了 I can't believe it, but today needs to be our last day.
你就把那邊的 If you could just grab
海草什么的收拾走 that little bit of seaweed shit over there,
就可以了 I think we're good.
還有我不知道這耙子是你的還是我的 Also, I actually don't know if that's your rake or my rake,
這就送你了 but by all means
還是要謝謝你 and again, thank you.
那邊還有個死海鷗 Oh, there's part of a dead seagull over there.
麻煩你一起收拾走 好吧 If you could just grab that, that'd be great, yeah?