前情提要
翻译：别扭大菜
我想让你们找安德鲁·莱斯利谈谈 I need you to talk to Andrew Lesley.
我们是不可能和那个自以为是 There is no way we are speaking
表里不一 屁话连篇的围巾男说话的 to that smug, duplicitous, talking scarf.
翻译：小肚腩 谋贤良
要是你帮我这个忙 If you do this for me,
校对：NANA小霸王
我就带你去金球奖赞助商展示活动 I will take you to a Golden Globes gifting suite.
再多说点 Say more.
时间轴：浓子
写的太棒了 So this is fantastic.
后期：鱼骨头 总监：NANA小霸王
非常成熟又幽默 It's sophisticated and hilarious,
你这一天估计都在听这些话 and you've been hearing that stuff all day long.
我说对了吧 So, was I right?
她很棒 有没有 She's great, right?
-她令人印象深刻 -妈呀 - She's very impressive. - Jesus.
赶紧告诉我你准备把剧给我们 Just tell me we're getting the fucking show.
这可能是个大错 It's probably a huge mistake,
我肯定到时候会非常后悔这个决定 and I'm sure there'll come a day when I regret this.
所以你答应了 So it's a yes!
我们需要做的是 What we need to do
减少你的花销 is look at reducing your expenses.
孩子的抚养费 赡养费 Child support, alimony--
那个实际上也不需要了 Actually, that one's going away.
我前妻就要再婚了 My ex-wife's getting remarried.
那可真是省了一大笔 Well, that's a sizable saving.
恭喜啊 Congratulations.
你跟奥利怎么样了 Where are we with Ollie?
-结束了 -就这样了 - It's over. - So that's it?
就这么结束了 It's just--just over?
对 结束了 Yeah. Over.
天啊 Oh, Jesus.
你眼睛里那是泪吗 Are those tears in your eyes?
太让人难过了 This is very upsetting.
戏里戏外 第四季 第三集
看着 Okay, watch.
首先像这样画上青蛙先生的眼睛 First you draw Mr. Froggie's eyes, like this.
画上下巴 Now let's give him a chin.
再加上腿 He's gonna need some legs...
还有嘴 And a mouth.
他非常惊讶 And he's really surprised,
他自己居然不是青蛙 'cause he's not a frog at all.
而是... 我勒个去 He's a-- what?
咋了 What?
是蒂姆·韦狄克的消息 Something from Tim Whittick.
他在这里 He's in town.
想和我们共进午餐 Wants to have lunch with us.
是和"我们"还是和"你" With "us" or with "you"?
也可能是指"你们" Could be the plural "you".
-亲爱的 他讨厌我 -他没有 - Darling, he hates me. - He doesn't.
得了吧 Oh, please.
在他眼里 我要是没出现 In his mind, if I hadn't come along,
你俩肯定还在共同创作 you'd still be writing together.
他叫我洋子 He calls me Yoko.
小野洋子 被指因其出现而导致披头士解散
他才没有叫你洋子 He doesn't call you Yoko.
是没有当面叫过我 但是 - Well, obviously, not to my face, but--
好吧 我从没跟你说过这事 All right, I've never told you this
因为我知道你肯定会说我疯了 because I know you'll say I'm crazy,
但他每次见到我 but every time he sees me,
他总是会在对话中有意无意提到"小野" he somehow manages to work the word "Ono" into the conversation.
"不是吧"[音同"小野"] "Oh, no."
没错 你是疯了 Yeah, you're crazy.
你们还在吗 Are you still there?
我们当然都还在 Of course we're still here.
办公室又没有别的门 There's no other way out.
肖恩和贝佛利办公室 Sean and Beverly's office.
艾琳·杰菲 一号线 Eileen Jaffee on one.
你好 Hello.
你们快死了吗 So are you dying?
每天死心一点点 A little bit every day.
言归正传 《交易杂志》头版 Seriously, front page of The Trades.
-什么 -你们还没看到吗 - What? - You haven't seen them yet?
没有 No.
在大肆宣传你们卖剧本的事 There's a whole thing about you guys selling the show.
温迪 《交易杂志》到了吗 Wendy, have The Trades arrived yet?
什么交际 What trains?
交易 Trades.
稍等 艾琳 Hang on, Eileen.
瞧瞧 Look at that.
真不敢相信你们还没看过 I can't believe you didn't see it.
真不敢相信他们用了那张傻乎乎的照片 I can't believe they used that stupid picture.
我看起来就像是某个失败的男声团体成员 I look like I'm in a failed boy band.
别管照片了 这事多了不起啊 Forget the picture. Enjoy this.
直接预订一季 A straight-to-series pickup--
今天会有三百名电视编剧恨死你们了 there are 300 TV writers who hate you today.
没有比这更好的了 It doesn't get better than that.
你确实喜欢让人嫉妒 You do like the envy.
好了 我得挂电话了 All right, I'm jumping off.
恭喜恭喜 你们可能不这么说 Mazel tov, as you probably don't say.
Mazel tov 为美国常用的希伯来语
-拜拜 -谢谢 - Bye. - Thank you.
新上任的电视台执行官海伦·拜什称 "Newly appointed network prexy Helen Basch says,
很高兴能拍摄如此才华横溢的剧本 'we're thrilled to be working with a script of this caliber.'"
谢谢你 海伦 Thank you, Helen.
这是真不能回头了 No turning back now.
你就不能高兴点吗 You really can't let yourself enjoy it?
不能 我就这样 Not and still be me.
好吧 Okay.
糟糕程度从一到十 On a scale of one to ten,
你觉得这会有多尴尬 How awkward would this be?
默克·拉皮多斯 Merc Lapidus...
五 Five.
想要过来推销一部戏 Wants to come in and pitch a show...
七 Seven.
我可能得买下这部剧 And I'm probably gonna buy it.
最高是十 对吧 It goes up to ten, right?
他卖的什么剧 What's he pitching?
我不知道 I have no idea.
但你知道你会买下来 But you know you're gonna buy it?
我可能不得不买 I sort of have to.
为什么 Because?
因为我人生第一份工作是他给的 He gave me my first job.
不可能 No way.
所以我大概是欠他一份人情 Yeah, so I kind of owe him.
至少他是这么说的 At least that's what he said.
你和他谈过了吗 You talked to him?
我只是听着 他苦求我 Oh, I listened. He begged.
他乞求的水平可真高超啊 He's very good with the begging.
相信我 我清楚着呢 Believe me, I know.
不不 No. No.
我 我不是指的 I-I didn't mean...
那方面 that way.
咋了 我... What? Look, I--
我不知道你听说了什么八卦 I don't know what you've heard--
我听说你俩奸情了五年 I heard that it lasted five years
他离开后才断了 and ended when he left.
看来你已经很了解了 So you're pretty much caught up.
我就觉得该帮他点什么 I just think I've got to do something.
他的人生真是糟糕透了 I mean, his whole life went to shit.
先被解雇 然后离婚 First the firing, then the divorce,
然后又是拉里·彭策尔这事 Now the Larry Penzel thing.
天啊 他也牵扯上了 Oh, my God, he was in that?
他很有可能遭受重创了 Supposedly, he took a big hit.
那他过来你没事吧 So you're gonna be okay having him here?
当然 Absolutely.
完全没事 我说真的 I'll be fine. Honest.
-有多真呢 -算是二吧 - Honest on a scale of-- - Let's say two.
够了 Good enough.
机组就位 Camera set.
背景就位 And background. And...
开拍 action.
台词 Line?
"早上好" "Morning."
早上好 Morning.
你要是识字的话 If you could read,
应该能看到已经闭馆了 you'd see the library is closed.
台词 Line?
"听说你和我弟弟玩得很开心啊" "So I hear you and my brother had a good time."
听说你和我弟弟玩得很开心啊 So I hear you and my brother had a good time.
也就差不多三分钟 For about three minutes.
不幸的是 约会长达三小时 Unfortunately, the date lasted three hours.
台词 Line?
"是谁早就提醒过你 "Hey, who's the person who warned you about him
而且不止发了一两封 in not just one, not just two,
而是五封邮件 but five emails,
并且每封都有个摇手指的表情" one of which had an emoticon of a wagging finger?"
我可早提醒过你了 Hey, I warned you.
你开什么玩笑 Are you kidding me?
台词 Line?
不是 混蛋 是我本人在说 No, asshole. That's me talking.
一整集你只有六句台词 You have six fucking lines in the whole episode.
-谁他妈在乎 -老天爷啊 - Oh, who gives a shit? - Jesus christ.
这破烂剧又不会有人看 No one's gonna see this piece of crap.
我才不会浪费时间背这破玩意儿 I'm not gonna waste my fucking Time learning it.
还要继续吗 Shall we continue?
你用看看剧本吗 You need to see the script?
不用 我挺好 No, I'm good.
准备 开始 And action.
-台词 -王八犊子 - Line? - Son of a bitch!
卡 Cut!
好 都拍完了 All right, I think we got that.
这场戏的结尾都没拍呢 We didn't even get to the end of the scene.
没关系的 已经够好了 It doesn't Matter. It's good enough.
是不是因为马特那破礼物套装 Is this about going to the stupid gifting suite with Matt?
我得赶在好东西没了之前到那 I have to get there before the good stuff's gone.
我们可以休息吃午餐了 I say we break for lunch.
真的 Really?
明显我们已经开始休息了 Apparently, we've already broken.
好的 大家可以去吃中饭了 Okay, that's lunch, everybody.
你还等什么 What are you waiting for?
去换衣服 快点 快点 Go change. Go. Go.
好 你必须努力克制一点 Okay, you are gonna have to try and calm down.
我这已经很努力了 This is me trying.
快去 Go!
蒂姆来了 Oh, there's Tim.
-该死 -蒂姆 - Oh, shit. - Tim!
我说的"该死"二字 有哪部分让你觉得 What about "Oh, shit" made you think
我想让他过来了 I wanted him over here?
-蒂姆来了啊 -你好啊 - It's Tim. - Hello, you.
你也好 And you.
见到你真高兴 Great to see you.
悄悄这二位大人物 Look at you two moguls.
哪有啊 Hardly.
我好喜欢他的电邮 "我们片场见" I loved this one's email-- "Meet me at the stage.
"在食堂吃点东西" We'll grab a bite at the commissary."
简直像是《日落大道》的情节 It's like something out of Sunset Boulevard.
可惜大多数时间 And yet most of the time,
我们俩就像威廉·霍登一样浮尸泳池 we feel like William Holden floating in the pool.
《日落大道》男主演员姓名 角色也是剧作家
反正见到你挺开心的 Anyway, so nice to see you.
什么 你居然不和我们一起走 Oh, what? You're not joining us?
我也希望可以啊 Oh, I wish I could.
可惜我和马特·勒布朗有约了 Unfortunately, I have this thing with Matt LeBlanc.
不是吧 Oh, no.
等一下 Wait. Hang on.
这间房里所有东西都是免费的吗 Everything in this room is free?
这几间房 Rooms.
这是第一间 This is just the first one.
我的天妈啊 Oh, my god.
简直是《绿野仙踪》成真了 It's like when The Wizard of Oz turns to color.
马特·勒布朗 Matt LeBlanc.
贝丝 维内克请我们来的 Beth Vennick put us on the list.
当然 欢迎 Absolutely. Welcome.
现在怎么办 Now what?
我们四处走走 Uh, well, now we go around,
他们会送东西给我们 and they give us stuff.
跟你说 这里和我脑子里的幻想 By the way, this is very similar
简直一模一样 to things I've made up in my head.
好吧 Okay.
抱歉 借过 Sorry. Sorry.
活力八号 是一种纯天然能量饮品 Vive-8 is an all-natural energy drink.
汇集了八种草药及多种维生素 It's packed with eight herbs and vitamins
以及抗氧化物 antioxidants
无糖 无咖啡因 No sugar, no caffeine.
能源来自人参 瓜拉纳 The boost comes from things like
黄芪等物质 ginseng, guarana, astragalus root.
味道惨绝人寰 Tastes like plague.
想来几罐吗 Would you like a few cans?
当然 Absolutely.
免费 It's free.
马特 您介意我给你照一张 Matt, do you mind if we get a shot of you
手拿活力八号的照片吗 maybe holding the vive-8?
没有免费的午餐 Nothing's free.
我建议一下 你能不能稍微有点选择性 I'm just saying, try to be a little selective.
喂 看这里 Hey, eyes here.
不管你拿了什么东西 我都得给人照相 'cause whatever you take, I got to do a picture,
然后他们会放到网站上 and then it shows up on their website,
马上就变成我在替那垃圾背书 and suddenly, I'm endorsing their shit.
我只要求你 别见啥要啥 So all I'm asking is that you don't take everything.
花生糖 Ooh, peanut brittle.
说说 你过的怎么样 So tell me, how are you?
最近在忙什么 What have you been up to?
我来这里想见点人 Oh, I'm out here trying to get meetings
当然 谁都没见到 and, of course, not getting meetings.
我这有个剧本 Eh, I've got this script.
我连一个阅读后被拒绝的机会都没有 I can't even get anyone to read it to reject it.
我懂 这破城市太恶心了 I know. It's a horrible, stupid town.
手里有俩剧的人如是说 Said the man with two tv shows.
好了 首先 Right, okay, first of all,
《冰球小子》一直以来就是个噩梦 Pucks! Has been a bloody nightmare.
没 我讲真的 No, no, seriously--
从头到尾 就他妈是场灾难 From start to finish, a fucking disaster.
哟 乖宝儿 Oh, poppet.
我这表情够遗憾吗 Do I look like I feel sorry for you?
已经很努力在装了 'cause I'm trying so very hard.
傻屌 Prick.
干嘛 你还想让我同情你 What? You want sympathy?
你的照片都登上《综艺》杂志了 Your picture's on the front of variety,
还是挺替你高兴的 which was very exciting, by the way.
当我看到的时候 When I read the thing,
我简直就"老天爷啊 I was like, "Oh, my god.
他们在拍我们的剧" They're making our show."
等等 什么 I'm sorry. What?
我们的剧 Our show.
你终于找到人拍了 You--you finally got it on.
不不 No. No.
其实我和贝贝在做的剧 Actually, the show Bev and I are doing
和你跟我乱想出来的东西 is vastly different from that thing
非常不一样 you and I kicked around.
这句话可不真 Well, that's not true.
不不 真的很不一样 No, no. It absolutely is.
《我们的对立面》跟那个不一样 The opposite of us bears no resemblance to--
我都想不起来叫什么名了 I can't even remember the name of the thing--
《我们不是他们》 We're not them.
对了 Right.
都是关于两个家庭 I mean, they're both about two families.
那个 Well...
每个演员各饰演两个角色 They've both got the same cast playing two parts.
对 但具体的角色 Right, but the specific characters,
故事 还有场景 the story, the scenes--
相信我 如果你看了就会发现... Believe me, if you'd read it, you'd realize--
-我已经看过了 -你已经看过了 - Oh, I've read it. - You've read it?
从斯坦利·理查森拿到了一份 I got a copy from Stanley Richardson.
他也还是我的经纪人啊 He's still my agent too, you know.
天 这人太没用了 God, he's useless.
但他给把我们的剧本给你了 But he gave you our script?
对 所以倒也不是完全没用 Right, so not completely useless.
对 Yeah.
让·卢克总部在巴黎 Jean luc is based in paris.
他所有的作品都是手工缝制 All his pieces are hand-stitched.
沙朗·斯通和詹妮弗·劳伦斯 He's designed for Sharon Stone,
都有穿他的设计 for Jennifer Lawrence.
我就这么穿走吗 And I can just take this?
我们也可以送到府上 Or we can ship it to you.
瞬间 你给我们带来的这些折磨和痛苦 Suddenly, all the crap you've put us through
现在看来也值得了 is totally worth it.
我们家的手工莎莎酱 Our artisanal salsas are all handcrafted
全部是由天然有机的原料手工加工而成 from natural, organic ingredients.
您要来一罐吗 Would you like a jar?
你说什么 就一罐 Seriously, a jar?
她刚刚送我一件皮夹克 She's giving out leather jackets.
猫砂 真假 Kitty litter? Really?
有机的呢 It's organic.
你他妈家里连猫都没有 You don't have a fucking cat.
贝贝对于拍我们俩的作品有什么想法 So how does Bev feel about doing our project?
她肯定觉得很尴尬吧 That's got to be a bit awkward for her.
她什么想法都没有 因为我们压根没提过 She doesn't feel anything, because we haven't discussed it,
因为 别介意 这根本不是一个剧 Because, no offense, it's not the same show.
就是一个 And yet it is.
我偷你一个薯条 I'm stealing one of your chips.
公平吧 Seems only fair.
我们先保留各自不同意见 Look, we're just gonna have to agree to disagree.
显然我和你的记忆内容非常不一致 Clearly, my recollection of it is very different from yours.
而且我们压根就没有剧本 And it's not even like there's a script
可以拿出来看 we can turn to or--
有笔记啊 There's the notes.
笔记 The notes?
我们的笔记 Our notes.
那句"我来打字" And the words "I'll do the typing"
终于有回报了 Finally pay off.
好吧 这些东西我是还没看过 Right, obviously, I haven't seen these,
但是我可以很肯定的告诉你有天壤之别 But I can tell you right now there are huge differences.
但是我的律师们还在 And yet my lawyers keep banging on
纠结那些相似点 About the similarities.
你的律师们 Your lawyers?
他们对这事儿挺激动的 They're very excited about this.
我还跟他们说他们"淡定" And I'm like, "Okay, calm down.
"这些是老朋友了" "These are old friends.
"他们才不会迫害我呢" "They wouldn't try and screw me.
"他们又不笨" They're not stupid."
去他的 这些我都要了 Ah, fuck it. I'm taking all of these.
有生之年我都不想走了 I want to stay here for the rest of my life.
那你还是快去死吧 我要闪人了 Well, then hurry up and die, 'cause I'm ready to go.
你疯了么 Are you fucking nuts?
有可能 怎么了 Probably. What?
你教他们画阴道了 You taught them to draw a vagina?
淡定 不就是个阴道么 Calm down. It's just a vagina.
贵安 How are ya?
他们还是孩子呀 They're children.
不会有问题的 They're fine.
怎么不会有问题 They're not fine.
说真的 放轻松 Seriously, relax.
放你个头的松 You relax.
你又不用怕接到一堆愤怒母亲的电话 You're not the one who's gonna get the calls
抱怨小孩回家的时候 From the other mothers when their kids come home--
-我的老天 -怎么了 - Oh, christ. - What?
-我等会儿打给你 -你在哪儿 - I got to call you back. - Where are you?
在一个傻逼赠送会上 At this stupid gifting-suite thing.
等会儿再讲 I'll talk to you later.
不许挂我... Do not hang--
你做什么啊 这是人家的 What are you doing? That's hers.
这是我桌上拿的 It was on the table.
这好像是你的 I believe that's yours.
操他大爷的 Jesus fuck.
你欠我一个包包 You owe me a handbag.
你们在这儿啊 There they are.
来来来 Come here.
看看你俩 我最喜欢的两个妹子 Oh, look at you-- my two favorite girls.
我发明的她们 I invented these two.
你说了算 Okay.
海伦·拜什 卡罗·兰斯 来见见 Helen basch, carol rance, meet...
-阿尔杨·范林登 -林登 没错 - Arjen Van der linden. - Linden. Yes.
-欢迎 -谢谢 - Welcome. - Thank you.
很高兴认识你 Nice to meet you.
这家伙是个天才 This guy is a genius.
-这个么 -别这个那个的 - Well... - No, no, no. Not "Well."
在荷兰他的节目可是榜首 He has the number-one show in holland.
你们真该见识见识 You should see.
整个国家在周三全部停摆 The whole country shuts down wednesday nights.
餐馆关门 街道空无一人 Restaurants close. Streets are deserted.
连木鞋的声音都听不到 You can't hear a wooden shoe.
快进来吧 跟我们说说看 Well, come on in. Tell us.
坐吧 坐吧 Sit, sit.
那我直接跟你们讲吧 Should I just dive in?
-我开始讲咯 -好的 - I'm diving in. - Yep.
从字面直译的标题是 Okay, the title literally translates as,
我和装我的盒子 This is me and the box I am in,
当然 这个标题我们会改 Which, obviously, we'll change.
因为不太抓眼球 It's not exactly gripping.
不过标题什么的先别管了 But titles, schmitles.
节目才是精彩部分 The show is fantastic.
这些荷兰混蛋太天才了 These dutch fucks are so brilliant at this.
就像生存者加上老大哥 It's like survivor meets big brother
加上百万富翁再加上 生存者 Meets millionaire meets... Survivor again.
好吧 Okay.
节目一开始 有12个人 It starts with, like, 12 people.
六个人 Six people. Yeah.
六个人 Six people.
他们都在盒子里面 And they're all in these boxes.
这个 一开始他们不在盒子里 他们 Well, they don't start in the boxes. They, uh--
对对对 Oh. Oh, right. Right, right, right.
不 一开始还不在盒子里 No, they're not in the boxes yet.
-他们一开始 -是坐在椅子上的 - They start... - In the chairs.
椅子上 In the chairs.
然后再降到盒子里面去的 And they're lowered into the boxes.
你们说的盒子是... When you say boxes...
是的是的 有点像是牢房 Yeah, yeah, they're like these cells
里面什么都没有 With nothing in them.
在盒子里面的这些人 And the people in the boxes
必须回答问题 Have to answer these questions,
答对得点数 And they get points.
-其实不是点数 -对 不是点数 - Not points. - Okay, not points.
但是就像是点数 But they're like points.
-咱们就算它是点数吧 -好吧 - Let's call them points. - Okay.
用点数来换取生活必需品 Yeah. To buy, like, basic necessities,
像是毯子或是鞋或是一片水果 Like a blanket or shoes or a piece of fruit.
这个 水果要晚一些才会出现 Well, fruit is later. It's...
晚些会有水果 fruit is later.
但是像是枕头或者厕纸啊 but say a pillow or toilet paper.
盒子里没有厕纸么 They don't have toilet paper?
里面有厕纸 They have toilet paper.
行行行 他们有厕纸 All right, all right, they have toilet paper.
咱们先别纠结小事 Let's not get bogged down.
重点是 他们要换取生活必需品 The idea is, they're buying these basic human necessities,
不包括厕纸 With the exception of toilet paper...
因为他们已经有厕纸了 which they already have.
他们的确有 Well, they do. Yeah.
好的 Okay.
或者是 这是我最爱的部分 Or-- and this is the part I love--
他们可以消耗点数 They can spend their points
来坑其他盒子里的人 To do shit to the people in the other boxes.
他们可以让其他人的盒子冷点或热点 They can make someone else's box colder or hotter
也可以往里面倒虫子 Or fill it with bugs.
-真的么 虫子 -真的 真的 - Really? Bugs? - Oh, yeah, yeah.
这是很重要的部分 That's a very big part of it.
他们喊"放虫啦" They yell, "Release the bugs!"
下面的观众会跟着喊"放虫啦" And the audience yells, "Release the bugs!"
这些操蛋的虫子就这么泼进去了 These fucking bugs come pouring in.
就像《谁敢来挑战》 还记得么 It's like fear factor. You remember fear factor?
NBC为满足观众的 猎奇心理而制作一个真人秀节目
跟那差不多 不过更高雅点 It's like that, but classy.
那是肯定的 他们有厕纸嘛 Well, of course. They've got toilet paper.
说的没错 Exactly.
那么这些人在盒子里面待多久呢 So how long are they in these boxes?
这个么 整个季度呗 Well, the whole season.
老天 Jesus.
要怎么结束呢 How does it end?
-他们相互投票决定 -不是的 - They vote each other out. - No.
不对不对 是观众投票 No, no, no. The audience votes.
-不是的 -我不晓得 - No. - I don't know.
反正就会结束的 It eventually ends.
我们又不会跟他们搞的一模一样 Look, we don't have to do it like they did it.
荷兰那什么鬼地方啊 It's fucking holland.
现在你又有空啦 Now you can talk?
我带着礼物来的 I come bearing gifts.
你带着垃圾回来的吧 You come bearing crap.
不全是垃圾啦 Not all of it's crap.
猫砂 Kitty litter?
好吧 有些是垃圾来的 Okay, some of it's crap.
等一下 有东西要给你看 Hang on. I want you to see something.
你儿子今天在美术课上画了这玩意儿 Your son drew this in art class.
我了个操 看看这个 Holy shit. Look at that.
-这是阴道 -我知道 - It's a vagina. - I know.
他 画了个 阴道 He drew a vagina.
淡定 Oh, calm down.
又没在里面画老二 It's not like there's a dick in it.
学校都给我打电话了 They called me from school.
必须的 I'll bet they did.
画得太棒了 This is very impressive.
你怎么就不懂 How do you not get--
我懂 但是老天 你看看 I get it. But, jesus, look at this.
他怎么画这些腿的 The way he drew the legs--
还有透视咧 还有细节咧 It's got perspective. It's got detail.
-连阴毛都画了 -是啊 - It's got pubes. - Yeah.
-他才八岁 -可不是么 - He's eight. - I know.
我八岁的时候连房子白云都画不好 When I was eight, I couldn't draw a house with clouds.
他有天分 He's talented.
你拿老娘开涮么 Are you fucking with me?
没有 No.
试着撇开生殖器再看看 Try to get past the pussy part.
撇开生殖器就没东西看了 There's nothing past the pussy part.
当然有东西 你看那精确度 Yeah, there is. Look at the execution.
好好看看 Just look at it.
你不得不承认 You got to admit...
好吧 我大概懂了... All right, I kind of see--
我就是这意思 that's all I'm saying.
不管怎么说 你是他父亲 Still, you're his father.
你不该教他这些鬼玩意儿 You're not supposed to teach him shit like this.
我可不敢说是我教的 Hey, I cannot take credit for this.
我画的就是一简笔画 That thing I drew was like a stick figure.
但这个 This...
叫天赋 is a gift.
你不许贴到冰箱上 You're not putting it on your fridge.
我绝对会贴到冰箱上 I am so putting it on my fridge.
见到你真高兴 So wonderful to see you.
谁都没有你会推销 Nobody pitches like you do.
你今天真是拿出了最好的表现 You really brought your "A" Game.
这节目完全用不着推销 Ah, this thing pitches itself.
我跟你们说 这节目绝对会火 I'm telling you, it's gonna be bigger here
比在荷兰还火 than it is over there.
别再夸了 我们豆买了 Stop selling. We bought it.
阿尔杨 很高兴认识你 Arjen, so nice to meet you.
我们非常期待 We're really excited about this.
谢谢 非常感谢 Thank you. Thank you very much.
我就跟你说吧 Didn't I tell you?
-周末愉快 二位 -谢谢 - Have a good weekend, you two. - Thanks.
去按电梯 Hey, get the elevator.
-我马上就过去 -好 - I'll be right with you. - Sure.
-你刚刚叫他什么 -谁 阿尔杨 - What did you call him? - Who? Arjen?
阿尔杨 阿尔杨 Arjen. Arjen.
阿尔杨 等等 Arjen, wait up!
天啊 Oh, my god.
我们这是买了个什么呀 What did we just buy?
完全不知道 I have no idea.
反正办的是好事 Well, we did a good thing.
派蒂 Patty?
告诉我 我今天没有安排了 Tell me I have nothing else today.
你今天没有安排了 You have nothing else today.
爱死你了 周一见 I love you. See you monday.
-真的吗 -对 回家吧 - You sure? - Yes. Go home.
周末愉快 Have a good weekend.
总体来说 头一周还不算太糟 All in all, not a bad first week.
还糟 Not bad?
我们买到了荷兰收视率第一的节目 We've got the number-one show in Holland.
包括《好声音》在内的很多大火真人秀都起源于荷兰
那可是荷兰 In Holland.
最棒的是 工作做完了 Well, the best part is, we're done.
有个问题 So here's a question.
你抽大麻吗 Do you ever get high?
极其偶尔 Once in a while.
这个挺酷的 Oh, these are kind of cool.
一走路就亮灯 They light up when you walk.
对 我就想要一双还得充电的人字拖 Yeah, that's what I need-- flip-flops I have to recharge.
我自己要了 I'll take 'em.
老天啊 看这个 Jesus, look at this.
谁会穿橡胶裙啊 Who the hell would wear a rubber dress?
画里这姑娘 Uh, the girl in this picture?
对了 你会喜欢这个的 Oh, here we go. You're gonna like this.
-你在干嘛 -怎么了 - What are you doing? - What?
我已经三个月滴酒未沾了 I haven't had a drink in three months.
我知道 所以才要庆祝一下嘛 I know. We should celebrate that.
你这个大贱人 You're such a shit.
偶尔小酌 死不了的 Once in a while's not gonna kill you.
这是戒酒十三步的最后一步吗 Is that the 13th step?
谁知道了 第二步我都没到过 I don't know. I never got past two.
有青柠吗 You got any limes?
-你觉得怎么样 -帅 - What do you think? - Nice.
怎么了 What?
镜片上那是划痕吗 Is that a scratch across the lens?
就剩这最后一副了 They were the last pair.
-可是不要钱啊 -好吧 - But free! - Right.
你能看到吧 But can you see?
看不太到 你完全搞错重点了啦 Not really, but you're totally missing the point.
选眼镜的重点 Of glasses?
你和蒂姆午餐吃的怎么样 So how was your lunch with Tim?
还有 你听到那句"小野"了吧 Oh, and by the way, you heard the "Oh, no" thing.
-听到了 -谢谢 - I did. - Thank you.
亮瞎你 Wanker.
好吧 午餐 Um, well, okay, lunch.
我先说一句 不用担心 Let me start by saying there is no cause for alarm.
绝逼是好货 This is fucking great.
是医用的吗 Is it medical?
我儿子种的 My son grows it.
我也想要孩子 I want children.
-谁 -麦拉 - Yeah? - It's Myra.
请进 Oh, come in.
现在说话方便吗 Is now a good time?
-当然方便 -非常 - Very, yeah. - Very.
我收到了纽约的选角 I got the casting from New York
是好消息 on first the good news.
已经给你们俩发链接了 I sent you both the link.
太好了 我们肯定会看的 Great. We'll definitely take a look.
周末愉快 Have a good weekend.
你要去哪玩吗 Are you doing anything fun?
大屠杀纪念馆里有新展了 There's a new exhibit at the Holocaust museum.
好好看 Enjoy.
再见 Bye.
她那表情 好像是闻出来了 She looked like she smelled it.
她总是一副闻到屎的表情 She always looks like she smelled it.
怎么这么安静 Why is it so quiet?
孩子们呢 Where are the boys?
我就欣赏你 到这会儿了 I like that you're just now wondering
才想起问孩子们去哪了 where your children are.
他们今天在我妈家睡 They're staying over at my mother's.
自愿去的 Willingly?
还记得我们没孩子那会吗 Remember when we didn't have kids?
太美好了 That was nice.
又不怪我 "我只放进去一点"先生 Don't blame me, Mr. "Just the tip."
还搞了俩次 And twice.
虽然我是爱着他们的 但是 I mean, I love 'em and all, but...
没有他们之前的日子多好啊 How great was it before they showed up?
在房子里四处乱搞 Screwing all over the house,
骑上脚踏车 沿着海岸骑 getting on the bike, riding up the coast.
时过境迁 It was a different time.
是啊 那时候你可疯了 Yeah, you were crazy back then.
那时候的我 可能就会穿那件橡胶裙 Back then, I would probably put on that rubber dress.
我不会穿橡胶裙的 I'm not putting on the rubber dress.
行吧 Okay.
我怀念这感觉 I miss this.
是呀 感觉不错 Yeah, this is nice.
我是说喝酒 I meant drinking.
天 你真美 God, you're cute.
我都忘记你有多美了 I forget how cute you are.
闭嘴 Shut up.
干嘛 What?
我不会穿橡胶裙的 I'm not putting on the rubber dress.
他奶奶个腿的 Fucking hell.
快出来 让我看看 Come on, let me see.
这是橡胶除轮胎以外的最佳用途 That's the best thing to happen to rubber since tires.
给乳胶裙姑娘买杯酒 Buy a latex girl a drink?
靠 Oh, fuck.
什么那么好笑 What's funny?
我在想象你和默克 I'm picturing you with Merc.
你干嘛要想那个 Why would you want to do that?
五年啊 真的吗 Five years? Really?
真的 但我都三十多了 Yeah, but I'm in my 30s,
也不算太浪费青春 so that's not time wasted.
好吧 Okay.
所以有 默克 So, Merc...
还有我前夫 我还听到八卦 My ex-husband and I heard a rumor.
很可能是真的 Probably true.
卡斯特·索托 Castor Sotto?
你和老板们都是怎么回事 What is with you and bosses?
就好这口吗 Have a type, do you? -
可能我是被权力吸引了吧 I think I'm attracted to power.
还有 我可能有恋父情结 Also, I may have some father issues.
难以自处再加上脑子不清 Self-aware and fucked up.
见到你很高兴 Pleased to meet you.
怎么光在谈我的烂事 Okay, why are we only talking about my shit?
你肯定也有烂事 You must have shit.
我当然有烂事 Oh, I do have some shit.
然后呢 So?
你好哪口的 What's your type?
你现在有恋人吗还是 Are you seeing anybody or--
有过 三个月前分手了 Was. Ended three months ago.
没事的 我很好 It's fine. All good.
是我认识的男的吗 Is he anyone I'd know?
也许 Uh, maybe.
这男的是三台新闻的詹妮弗·科利尔 He's Jennifer Collier from channel three news.
所以你的菜是... So your type is...
是聪明 I'd say smart...
美丽 beautiful,
轻微的破损 slightly damaged.
你认识这类型的人吗 You know anyone like that?
我的天 My.
所以 So...
也许不只是恋父情结 maybe not just father issues.