前情提要
翻译：小肚腩 别扭大菜
当我看到的时候 我简直就 When I read the thing, I was like,
"老天爷啊 他们在拍我们的剧" "Oh, my God. They're making our show."
翻译：谋贤良 NANA
不 其实我和贝贝在做的剧 No, actually, the show Bev and I are doing
和你跟我乱想出来的东西非常不一样 is vastly different from that thing you and I kicked around.
校对：NANA小霸王
这句话可不真 Well, that's not true.
时间轴：浓子
他奶奶个腿的 Fucking hell.
后期：鱼骨头 总监：NANA小霸王
我怀念这感觉 I miss this.
是呀 感觉不错 Yeah, this is nice.
我是说喝酒 I meant drinking.
靠 Oh, fuck.
所以你的菜是... So your type is...
我觉得是聪明 I'd say smart...
美丽 beautiful...
轻微受损 slightly damaged.
你认识这类型的人吗 You know anyone like that?
我的天 My...
戏里戏外 第四季 第四集
我们完蛋了 Oh, we are so screwed.
我不这么认为 I disagree.
亲爱的 我们真完蛋了 Darling, we are so screwed
再有权势的人也救不了我们了 that large men with tools could not unscrew us.
我们的台本和这笔记上的完全不一样 Our script is totally different from what's in those notes.
"完全" "Totally"?
好吧 也就碰巧两个家庭 All right, it's got two families
由同一批演员演 played by the same group of actors.
你是指整个剧本的前提设定 You mean the premise.
行吧 设定相同 但这都是我的创意 Fine, the premise, but it was my idea.
他屁都没帮上 He offered nothing.
蒂姆也就是把它记到纸上 All Tim did was type it.
这就值不少钱呢 Well, clearly that's where the money is.
话说 难道不觉得有点奇怪吗 And by the way, don't you think it's a little odd
你以前从来没跟我提过这事 that this is the first you're telling me any of this?
因为这根本就不是个事 Because there was no "this" to tell.
也就只是个想法 It was just an idea.
现在不就有事了吗 Well, there's a "this" now.
我只是不爽他怎么突然腆着脸 It just pisses me off that he has the nerve
非说这剧本是我和他一起想出来的 to suddenly claim we came up with it together.
无所谓是谁想出来的 Doesn't matter who came up with it.
你和他是搭档 You were his partner.
你这是跟他站在一边 Are you really taking his side?
相信我 这事对我来说 Oh, believe me, the irony of this...
不知道有多讽刺 但是很抱歉 I am choking on it, but I'm sorry.
他有权这么做 He is within his rights.
等等 Wait.
你这意思难道是说 You mean to tell me that if...
如果爱因斯坦创立了相对论 if Albert Einstein came up with the theory of relativity...
你还真敢拿你自己跟他比 Really? That's who you're comparing yourself to?
就这么个意思 To make a point.
行吧 Fine.
如果爱因斯坦创立了相对论 If Einstein came up with the theory of relativity...
而他一无是处的搭档 衰因斯坦 And his useless partner, Shmeinstein,
啥都没做 只是把理论记在了白板上 did nothing but write it on the board,
难道他应该共享荣誉吗 he should share equal credit?
如果他俩是搭档 那就没错 If he's his partner, yes.
然后还可以正当命名为 And then it would rightfully be called
爱因斯坦-衰因斯坦相对论 Einstein and Shmeinstein's theory of relativity
让全世界的学生们都能乐开花 to the absolute delight of schoolchildren everywhere.
早 Morning.
靠 Oh, fuck.
我们喝了多少龙舌兰酒 How much tequila did we have?
不多不少 I'd say just enough.
四年的心理咨询全白费了 There goes four years of therapy out the window.
别这样 我们昨晚很开心啊 Come on, we had fun.
我很开心 I had fun.
有什么不好吗 What's bad?
今天想干什么 So want to do something today?
一起 Together?
不好吗 Why not?
孩子在你妈那 Your mom's got the kids.
我没事 你也没事 I got nothing. You got nothing.
我得和我姐姐吃午饭 I'm supposed to have lunch with my sister.
看来你比没事要多点事 Okay, so you got worse than nothing.
去沙滩吧 Come out to the beach.
你好久没来过别墅了 You haven't been to the house in a while.
我爱死那房子了 Oh, I fucking love that house.
那就不该跟我离婚 Shouldn't have divorced me.
那房子也没好到这种程度 It's not that great a house.
咋样 来马里布吗 So yeah? Malibu?
行啊 来就来 Sure, why not?
咋了 What?
你好的时候可真好 You're nice when you're nice.
早上好呀 要咖啡吗 Good morning. Coffee?
不用了 谢谢 No, I'm fine. Thank you.
-我正要喝呢 -那好吧 - I'm having some. - Okay.
这厨房可真豪华 What a pretty kitchen.
你好呀 Hello.
-像两座小岛 -是啊 - Wow, two islands. - Yeah.
我喜欢想象它们原来是一座大岛 I like to think that originally they were one big island,
随着时间推移它们漂移分开了 but then over time they drifted apart.
-奶和糖 -不用了 - Milk and sugar? - No, I'm fine.
-你不是喜欢... -是啊 - Don't you take it with... - I do, yes.
好啦 呼吸 Okay, breathe.
再来 Again.
感觉好多了吗 You feel better?
好了一点点 A little bit.
昨晚很棒 Last night was nice.
昨晚非常美妙 Oh, last nice was amazing.
是啊 I know.
我得说 And I got to say,
对从来没体验过这事的人来说 for someone who has never done it before...
刚开始是有一点奇怪 It was a little weird at first.
没有"把柄"可以握住 I mean, there's nothing to hold on to.
是啊 这需要适应 毫无疑问 Oh, no, it's an adjustment, no question,
但你很快就熟门熟路了 but, I mean, you picked it right up.
我擅长取悦他人 I'm a people pleaser.
可不是嘛 I will say.
我忍着不去笑了 I'm trying not to giggle.
没事 你可以笑 Okay, you can giggle.
不用 我没事 No, I'm okay.
再来一次 Do it again.
看好了 Watch.
靠 Shit.
不去看下吗 Do you got to get that?
不用 只是事件提醒 No, it's just a reminder.
什么事 About?
小事 和贝佛利一起爬山 Just a thing... A hike with Beverly.
肖恩夫妇的那个贝佛利吗 Oh, of "Sean and Beverly"?
是的 我去回绝吧 Yeah. I'll cancel.
不不不 去爬山吧 Oh, no, no, no, no, no. Go. Hike.
我不想爬山 我想和你待在一起 I don't want to hike. I want to stay with you...
除非你想让我去 Unless you want me to go.
不不不 我想让你留下陪我 Oh, no, no, no. I-I want you to stay,
除非你自己想去 you know, unless you want to go.
不想 No.
除非你想一起去 Unless you want to come?
我很想去 I would love to come.
除非你觉得贝佛利不想... Unless you think Beverly wouldn't want...
不不不 她可喜欢你了 No, no, she really likes you,
她很少会喜欢别人的 and she doesn't like anybody.
她都不怎么喜欢我 She barely likes me.
那好吧 Okay, great.
我得先回家换衣服 I just need to run home and change.
你可以穿我的衣服 Oh, I got stuff you can wear.
是吗 可以吗 Really? You sure?
当然了 你想穿哪件都行 Of course. You can borrow anything.
好的 Okay.
女同这事还挺不错 I like this lesbian thing.
看我找到谁了 Look who I found.
天啊 海伦 你好 Oh, my God. Helen, hello.
真是个惊喜 This is a nice surprise.
希望你别介意 我不想打扰 I hope it's okay. I don't want to...
当然不会介意了 Of course it's okay.
这回她就不能抱怨工作了 Now she can't complain about work.
新的风格啊 我喜欢 Ooh, this is new. I like it.
我也喜欢 Yeah, me too.
这个苗头很好啊 So this is a good sign,
第一个休息日 你们就约在一起了 the two of you together on your first day off.
看来第一周过得很不错啊 I gather week one went well.
你觉得是很不错吗 Would you say it went well?
我觉得是超级无敌好 Oh, I'd say it went very well.
我声明 Oh, I do declare.
这里有点热烘烘喽 It is getting mighty toasty up here.
-怎么 -她讨厌我这么说话 - What? - She hates my voices.
是挺讨厌的嘛 What's not to hate?
我觉得挺可爱的 I think they're fun.
-是吗 -你才没有 - You do? - You don't.
是的 I do.
为什么 拜什小姐 您过奖了 Why, Miss Basch, you flatter me.
失陪 有悬崖还等着我去跳 Excuse me while I hurl myself off this cliff.
太棒了 Great.
-怎么了 -我水喝没了 - What? - I'm out.
喝我的 Oh, take mine.
不用 No.
-你客气疯了 -你确定吗 - That's crazy. - Are you sure?
当然了 Totally.
-喝完吧 -不用 - Finish it. - No!
-没事的 -真的吗 - It's fine. - Really?
真的 Really.
你俩也可以喝我的 You're both welcome to mine.
-没事 -不用 谢谢 - We're good. - No, that's okay.
谢谢 Thank you.
早 Morning.
某人心情不错啊 Ah, somebody's in a good mood.
我在想 I was just thinking,
操你老婆是有多爽啊 "How great is it to fuck your wife?"
等等 你说什么 I'm sorry, what?
怎么了 What?
不 不 不是 Oh, no, no, no.
不是你老婆 Not your wife.
你是指任何人 One's wife.
我理解你为什么...但不是 不不 I see why you'd... but no, no, no, no.
我操了我自己的老婆 No, no, I just fucked my wife.
好吧 前妻 Well, ex-wife.
感谢你的澄清 Thank you for clarifying.
那感觉特别轻松 It's just so easy.
我知道她喜欢怎样 I know what she likes.
她知道我喜欢的 She knows what I like.
我知道她不会做什么 I know what she won't do.
她也...我还真没什么不能做的 She... Well, there's really nothing I won't do.
你和戴安哈 So you and Diane?
真神奇 Amazing.
我知道 都一个礼拜了 I know. Almost a week now.
那个男朋友呢 And the boyfriend?
虽然说他的存在对你来说完全不是问题 Not that that would ever be an impediment to you.
玩完 滚犊子了 Done. Gone.
拜拜 奥利 Bye-bye, Ollie.
好吧 不敢相信我会说到那方面 All right, I can't believe I'm actually gonna go here,
但曾经 but at one point,
你跟我说过她的问题在... you talked about an issue with her...
下面 Nether.
逼太松 Oh, the loose-pussy thing?
我已经后悔提这个事了 And already I'm sorry I went there.
是 离婚以后她把那给解决了 Yeah, she had that taken care of after the divorce.
做了个什么手术 把那里给 She had that surgery where they get in there
收紧了 and tighten everything up.
天老爷啊 Dear God.
花了我一大笔钱 Yeah, cost me a bundle.
不过现在看来 钱花的值 Although looking back, money well spent.
咱分个百吉饼 Split a bagel?
总之 Hey, anyway.
我知道你可能以为我疯了 Look, I know you're gonna say I'm nuts,
但我现在在考虑 but I'm kind of thinking
这是不是可以变成永久的事 I could see us making it permanent again.
-这才处了一周 -为什么不 - After a week? - Why not?
不会跟你当前的经济状况 This wouldn't by any chance have a little something
有那么一丁点儿关系吧 to do with your current financial situation?
节省下来的钱是非常可观 Well, the savings would be considerable.
我就知道 There we go!
说真的 如果我不支付赡养费和子女抚养费 Seriously, if I could stop paying alimony and child support?
天啊 我就不用卖葡萄园了 Jesus. I wouldn't have to sell my vineyard.
你求婚的时候一定把这句话写进去 You should definitely work that in when you propose.
我们从来没有停止过对彼此的爱 Look, we never really stopped loving each other.
还能一直陪着我的儿子们 And being back with my boys full time?
你想啊 Come on.
而且给我管钱的说我能省至少三百万 Plus my money guys think I could get at least $3 million
如果一起住 for the house.
我读了那个蒂姆拿过来的笔记 So I read through those notes from that Tim guy,
又给法务看了 and I ran them past legal.
然后呢 And?
你们有法律问题了 You have a legal problem.
-谢谢 -真的吗 - Thank you. - Seriously?
他的要求是有理由的 He's got a valid claim.
合法的吗 Legally?
合法的 法务说的 Legally, according to legal.
他妈的 现在怎么办 Bloody hell. So what now?
我们跑路吧 I say let's go pack.
先别慌 Okay, nobody panic.
让我跟他谈 Let me talk to him.
如果有必要 我们就给他点东西嘛 If we have to, we'll give him a little something,
但别担心 我会把他处理掉的 but don't worry. I'll make this go away.
-祝好运 保持联系 -天 希望如此 - Good luck. Let us know. - God, I hope so.
于是乎噩梦继续 And so the nightmare continues.
-法务说的 -太好了 - According to legal. - Perfect.
好了 Oh, good.
讽刺巴士来了 The irony bus is here.
这傻逼城市 Stupid town.
我他妈讨厌小丑 I fucking hate clowns.
你是她朋友 你就问吧 You're her friend. Just ask her.
我做不到 太尴尬了 I can't. It's too weird.
她肚子一天比一天大了 She's getting bigger every day.
我知道 我猜要么最后她生出个孩子 I know. I figure eventually she'll either have a baby
要么那六个智利矿工终于挖通出路了 or six Chilean miners will dig their way out.
真不敢相信 It's unbelievable.
不敢相信什么 What's unbelievable?
老天啊 感觉她出来的时机都很精确 Jesus, it's like she lives in a clock.
我... I... um...
我刚跟安迪说 I was just telling Andy
我刚知道我表姐 凯伦怀孕了 I found out my cousin Karen is pregnant.
她还是未婚 She's not married.
好像也没有男友 I don't think she even has a boyfriend,
但大家都不介意 因为我们都爱她 but nobody cares because we all love her,
都在为她感到高兴 and we're just happy for her.
知道我说什么呢吧 Know what I'm saying?
我表姐弗兰妮有秃头症 My cousin Franny has alopecia.
英国男演员
不戴假发的话 她看起来就像本·金斯利 Without her wig, she looks like Ben Kingsley.
所以我们是在讲表姐故事 So we're telling cousin stories.
你看过默克给的名单了吗 Hey, have you seen this list from Merc?
什么名单 What list?
荷兰娱乐节目的主持候选人 Possible hosts for his Dutch game show.
怎么样 How is it?
很明显是他自己写的名单 Well, it's clear that he did it himself.
太老 太老 Too old. Too old.
老掉牙了 这个过世了吧 Way too old. Dead?
《魔茧》上映那会儿就死了 Since, like, Cocoon.
我们需要个新名单 I think we need a new list.
话说 你有空的时候 Oh, and when you get a sec,
预算的数目已经送到我的办公室了 I've got those budget numbers in my office.
我现在就有空处理 I can do that now.
太好了 Great.
待会儿见 See you guys later.
-回见 -拜拜 - Bye. - Bye-bye.
什么 What?
不可能 No.
真的吗 Really?
你得走了 You got to go.
我不走 No, I don't.
走吧 Yeah, you do.
趁孩子都还没醒 赶紧走 I want you out of here before the boys get up.
为什么 Why?
我不希望让他们误解 I don't want to confuse 'em.
或者 Or...
干脆就跟他们挑明 we could make it less confusing.
我不晓得你想说啥 I have no idea what that means.
如果我们以后一直都能这样 What if we did this in, like, a more permanent way.
你还醉着呢 Are you still drunk?
先别拒绝 Before you say no,
你觉得再结一次婚怎么样 what do you think of getting married again?
回去吧 Go home.
这事真的不现实吗 Is that so crazy?
是的 非常不现实 Yeah, that's crazy.
为什么 Why?
这感觉多棒 This feels right.
你自己心里也清楚 You know it does.
还有谁能比我们更合拍 Where are you gonna find this again, huh?
难道那什么奥利能 With stupid Ollie?
至少跟我在一起你知道你会得到什么 At least with me you know what you're getting.
那可不 I'll say.
那又是为什么 你有新欢了 So then what? Someone new?
又去跟另一个人从头开始 You want to start from scratch?
那要多麻烦 Ugh, so much work.
你每天还得装好人 You have to be nice all the time.
刚开始装装就够了 Only at the beginning.
你刚放屁了 Did you just fart?
没有 No.
-还狡辩 -闭嘴 - Liar. - Shut up.
你还能在谁面前放屁呢 See, who else can you fart in front of?
我去跟那个人结婚 Yeah, marry that person.
拜托 Oh, come on.
想想孩子们 Think about the boys.
我们的复合对他们来说会有多棒 How great would it be for them if we got back together?
这跟上一次能有什么区别呢 And it'd be different now why?
因为这一次我就知道我将会失去什么 'Cause now I'd know what I'd be losing.
你疯了 You're insane.
也许是的 Maybe.
你考虑考虑 Just think about it.
回家去 Go home.
你不得不承认 You got to admit,
这比我上次的求婚可好多了 this is way better than my last proposal.
-这一次你没高潮 -没错 - In that you weren't coming? - Exactly.
这么说来你真的跟她提了 So you actually broached it with her?
没错 I believe I did,
如果我没理解错"提"的意思 if "Broached" Means what I think it does.
然后呢 And?
她没有拒绝 She didn't say no.
你不会觉得她会那么简单的同意吧 Well, you didn't think she would just say yes.
她几分钟前还跟人家订着婚 She was engaged to someone else, like, two minutes ago.
要我就肯定不会拒绝我 I'd say yes to me.
那当然 你那么自恋 Of course, but you're in love with you.
至少不会把我自己踢下床 Well, I wouldn't kick me out of bed.
你确定你真的准备好了吗 And you're really ready to do this?
-为什么不 -这可是个承诺 - Why not? - Um, it's a commitment?
我知道 我以前也承诺过 I know. I've made commitments before.
正是 Exactly
这次不一样 This is different.
-是吗 -没错 - Is it? - Yeah.
你准备好了这一次要忠贞不渝 You're prepared to be faithful this time?
当然 Totally.
忠贞不渝 Faithful.
我知道 Yes!
不能再碰其他的女人 No other women ever again
一辈子都不能 for the rest of your life?
好吧 咱们先别冲动 Okay, let's not get crazy.
门是开的 It's open.
你的包裹 This just came for you.
写着"易腐坏" It says "Perishable."
很好 谢谢 搁那儿吧 Great. Thanks. Leave it here.
黛安最喜欢的 Diane's favorite thing in the world
就是巴尔的摩的蒸蟹 is these steamed crabs from Baltimore,
所以我空运了一大堆来给她个惊喜 so I had a ton of 'em flown in to surprise her.
你节省开支的计划进行得不错啊 I see the belt-tightening is going well.
我得告诉你 I have to tell you,
我连跟你们公司的 I couldn't even get a meeting
初级经纪人的见面机会都争取不到 with a junior agent from your agency,
结果我现在居然在 and now here I am being taken to lunch
跟著名的艾琳·杰菲一起吃饭 by the famous Eileen Jaffee.
简直像做梦一样 It's like a dream.
可不是吗 I know.
我觉得我有可能想多了 So I may be way off base,
你不想聊的话我马上可以打住 and tell me it's none of my business...
那天我们去慢跑的时候 The other day on our hike...
怎么了 Yeah?
我 I, um...
我感觉到 I thought I sensed...
有点 ...A certain...
我也不知道 可能是我想多了 I don't know, maybe I'm crazy...
你跟海伦有点什么 between you and Helen.
-不会吧 -没错 - Really? - Yep.
但是你也不是... But you're not...
什么时候开始的 Since when?
今天几号 What's today?
我的老天哪 Oh, my God.
不会是因为你睡老板的习惯吧 Please tell me this isn't just because you work for her.
不 不是那样的 No! No, no.
这次完全不一样 This is totally different.
我也想这么说 I would say so.
她太不可思议了 She is amazing.
满足了我对一段感情的所有期望 It's everything I always wanted in a relationship.
所有 Everything?
当然啦 没有鸡巴 Well, sure, no dick.
但是那些鸡巴 But, hello, those dicks...
都带着一个鸡巴男人 They come with dicks.
你的那些的确是 Well, yours all certainly did.
但是和她在一起 我们一起玩 But with her, we hang out.
一起笑 一起能做有趣的事情 We have fun. We... we do stuff.
我去过她家了 I've been to her house.
不会吧 No.
她觉得我这个人很有趣 She thinks I'm funny.
-真的 -别那么惊讶 - Really? - Less surprised.
真的啊 Really?
那 那个 And, uh, the...
那什么呢 part?
这么说吧 Let's just say...
妹子对阴道了解的一清二楚 The lady knows her way around the vagina.
你以为我会吃不下饭 You'd think I'd stop eating.
那 And, um...
你的部分呢 from a reciprocal standpoint?
我显然是没有这么近距离见过 Oh, well, obviously I've never seen one that close before.
显然了 Obviously.
我本来以为会很奇怪 I thought it'd be a little weird,
但是你凑过去之后就感觉 这我熟 but once you get down there, it's, like, "Oh, I know you."
可不 Sure.
最棒的部分在于 当我们 The best part is when we're...
她很投入的 明白吗 She's really there, you know?
跟男的在一起 很多时候 With those guys, a lot of the time
我感觉就好像是别人穿在脚上的一只袜子 I felt like a sock with someone else's foot in it.
这回真吃不下了 Okay, I'm done.
但是跟海伦 感觉我们是真在一起 But with Helen it's like we're together.
感觉非常对 It just feels right.
很轻松 It's easy.
很美好 It's nice.
我的天 My God.
是吧 I know.
感觉很怪 但是 It's weird, but...
我觉得我可能会很开心 I think I might be happy.
看起来倒是这么回事 It certainly seems like it.
所以可能主要在于找到一个对的老板 So maybe it was just about finding the right boss.
可能吧 Maybe.
卡罗和海伦 Carol and Helen?
这我是真没想到 I did not see that coming.
我估计卡罗自己都没想到 I don't think Carol did either.
所以海伦是个 So Helen's a...
看样子是 Apparently so.
但卡罗并不完全算 But Carol's not officially...
我觉得俗世对她还不够了解 I don't think she's earned all her badges.
温迪 Wendy?
温迪 Wendy!
估计她还搞不清楚那是她名字 Maybe she hasn't learned that's her name yet.
-你好 -你好 - Hello? - Hi.
-你们好啊 -你好 - Hi, guys. - Oh, hello.
我刚跟蒂姆愉快地共进了午餐 So I just had a lovely lunch with Tim.
-然后呢 -我觉得很有意义 - And? - I'm glad I did,
因为他原来并不想要钱 because it turns out he doesn't want money.
-真的吗 -那是挺让人惊讶的 - Really? - That's a surprise.
他只想参与进来 He just wants to be involved.
什么意思 Meaning?
他想跟你们一起拍这个戏 He wants to run the show with you.
-什么 -疯了吧 - What? - That's insane.
如果他要来拍这个戏 那他不就该得钱吗 By the way, if he's running the show, wouldn't he get money?
是 不过他不只想要钱 Yes, but he doesn't just want money.
我应该这么说才对 I should have said it that way.
我希望你拒绝了 Well, I hope you said no.
我说我会跟你们谈 I said I'd talk to you.
我记得你说要把这事处理掉 I thought you were gonna make this go away.
-我也记得 -我天 - So did I. - Christ.
他现在把我们吃得死死的 Look, he's got us over a barrel.
我明白你的意思 No, I hear you.
如果代价是一场恶心的官司 Well, if the alternative's a hideous lawsuit,
那我们就受着好了 maybe we just suck it up.
我以为这一部戏的重点 I thought the whole idea of this show
就在于不会再有气受了 is that there wouldn't be any more sucking,
不是说我们不会再受气了吗 that we were done with sucking?
可能还会再受点气 There may be a little more suck.
莫塔拉 Hey, Mirtala.
戴安在吗 Is Diane around?
她好像在楼上 I think she's upstairs.
好的 Great.
干脆 Actually...
有人吗 Hello!
有人吗 Hello?
有人吗 Hello.
这他妈算啥 What the fuck?
我的天 赶紧出去 Oh, my God! Get out of here!
-这谁啊 -我是奥利 - Who's this? - I'm Ollie.
你是奥利 You're Ollie?
我是奥利 I'm Ollie!
他他妈的在这儿干啥 What the fuck is he doing here?
你他妈的又在这儿干啥 What the fuck are you doing here?
我带着螃蟹[又意阴虱] I've got crabs.
你有阴虱 You've got crabs?
不是 螃蟹 No, crabs.
螃蟹 Crabs.
你不能随便进来 You can't just show up here.
不会再来了 Yeah, that's not gonna be a problem.
-那是什么 -螃蟹 - What's that? - Crabs.
我给你带了最爱吃的螃蟹 I got you your fucking crabs.
巴尔的摩的 From Baltimore?
对 巴尔的摩买来的 可是我告诉你 Yeah, from Baltimore, but you know what?
你配不上这螃蟹 You don't deserve crabs.
我不知道该说什么 I don't know what to say.
他 过来把东西拿走 我们就聊上了 He... he came over to get his stuff, we started talking.
有人该教他 嘴在忙的时候 Well, someone should tell him not to talk
就不该聊天 with his mouth full.
你说过你跟他完了 You said you were done with him.
我是跟他完了 I was done with him.
我跟你不也完了 有些事又说不准 I was done with you too. Things happen.
你对这种事最了解了 You of all people should know that.
可别把矛头指向我 Don't make this about me.
好吧 好吧 不过我得声明 All right, all right, but for what it's worth,
我跟他是真完了 I am done with him.
我也得声明 我跟你也完了 Well, for what it's worth, I'm done too.
我很抱歉 这事是很蠢 I'm sorry. It was stupid.
根本不代表什么 It meant nothing.
我不这么觉得 Not to us.
如果能给你带来一丝丝安慰的话 If it's any consolation,
这挺好吃的 these are delicious.
不能 安慰不了 Nope. No consolation.
既然这样 我是真不爱吃这玩意 Well, in that case, I am really not a fan.
我简直不能相信 I still can't believe it.
太让人震惊了 It's so shocking.
我一直在想象你们四个人在浴室 I keep picturing the four of you in that shower.
-你把螃蟹也算进去了 -是的 - You're counting the crab? - I was.
她怎么能这么对我 How could she do this to me?
我懂的 I know.
我明白你现在的感受 Look, I know how you're feeling right now.
你不明白 No, you don't.
我能想象 Well, I can imagine.
你不能 No, you can't.
无论如何吧 Nevertheless,
你确定这就完全结束了 are you sure it's definitely over?
你开什么玩笑 Are you kidding me?
她说了那是个错误 是个偶然事件 She said it was a mistake and just a one-time thing.
我还该接受这个事实 And I'm supposed to be okay with that?
不该 但是其他人都想办法 No, but other people have managed
忘掉了这种事 to get past things like this.
我他妈可不知道怎么忘 I don't fucking know how.
我想说一下你对她做过多少次这种事 Is it worth pointing out the irony of the number of times
我觉得这事还挺讽刺的 you've done something like this to her?
不 我觉得你不应该说出来 No. It is not worth pointing out the irony.
事实上我想说 In fact, I will go so far as to say it is never
对任何人 生活中 的讽刺 worth pointing out the irony...
别人都不应该说出来 in life... to anyone... ever.
懂了 Noted.
操他奶奶 God damn it.
这事本来可以很美好 It could have been so good...
我们两重新在一起 The two of us back together,
每天都能见到两个儿子 seeing my boys every day.
而现在呢 And now...
我得把葡萄园给卖了 I'm gonna have to sell my vineyard!