你能帮我一个忙吗 Hey, can you do me a favor?
我们可以尽量避免跟我们的朋友 Can we try to avoid talking to our friends tonight
聊到婚礼计划的事吗 about our wedding plans?
我可以帮你更大的忙 I'll do you one better.
我会完全不跟他们说话 I'll avoid talking to our friends entirely
只低头玩手机 and play on my phone.
因为我还没选出谁当伴娘 It's just, I haven't picked a maid of honor yet,
要从佩妮或伯纳黛特中选一个实在太难 and I'm having trouble deciding between Penny and Bernadette.
能理解 Ah, understandable.
她们型很像 They are quite similar--
都是金发的前服务员 而且都嫁得不好 both blonde former waitresses who married beneath them.
佩妮是我的死党 Penny is my best friend,
但我当了伯纳黛特的伴娘 but I was Bernadette's maid of honor,
我想她会觉得我理应回邀 and I think she kind of expects it.
所以如果今晚有人提起这话题 So if anyone brings it up tonight,
或许你可以帮忙我改变一下话题 just maybe you can help me change the subject.
这样吧 How about this?
我强行主导所有话题 I dominate the conversation so hard,
让别人连插嘴的机会都没有 no one has a chance to get a word in edgewise.
这招嘛... I don't know.
我觉得他们已经司空见惯了 They might see that coming.
那我们用个暗语如何 What if we have a code word?
这就是我的"游艇"了 Ooh, now you're speaking my catamaran.
那是我"强项"的暗语 That's my code word for "language."
行吧 游艇 Okay, fine, catamaran.
这就是我们的暗语 That's our code word.
不行 那是我的暗语 你自己想一个 No, that's my code word. Get your own.
行吧 椒盐脆饼干 Okay. Uh, pretzels.
你听到我说椒盐脆饼干 你就转换话题 You hear me say pretzels, you change the subject.
动物园里我最不喜欢的动物是犀牛 Rhinos are my least favorite animals at the zoo.
你说什么 What?
抱歉 我还以为你刚才要我换话题了 Oh, I'm sorry. I thought we started.
帮我扶好 等我把它拧进去 Hey, just-just hold the gate still while I screw it in.
我不知道该对你们 You know, I don't know how I feel
搞婴儿保护措施作何感想 about all this baby-proofing.
如果哈雷不能自学怎么走下楼梯 If Halley can't teach herself to walk down the stairs,
或许这是大自然在说 then maybe that's nature's way of saying
沃罗威茨家到此终结 the Wolowitz line ends here.
有意思 我一直以为 That's funny. I always thought
霍华德才是大自然在说 Howard was nature's way of saying
沃罗威茨家到此终结的作品 the Wolowitz line ends here.
我也以为 但柳暗花明又一村 Me, too, but life does find a way!
哈雷够不着酒柜的啊 Hey, Halley can't reach the liquor cabinet.
你们为什么也做了婴儿保护 Why did you baby-proof it?
那你怎么发现我们做了的 How did you know we did?
有道理 Fair point.
伯纳黛特还在炸毛吗 Bernadette still going stir-crazy?
有一点吧 Oh, a little.
卧床休养了两个月 的确是挺难熬 Two months of bed rest-- it's kind of rough.
是吗 感觉很爽啊 我怎么能有这待遇 Really? That sounds great. How do I get that?
你得摔伤屁股 或让霍华德搞大你肚子 You'd either have to break your hip or let Howard knock you up.
但无论是哪一种 你隔天早上都能收到花 Now, either way, you'll get flowers the next morning.
但其实她也没闲着 She's actually been keeping herself busy
一直忙着为你研究婚礼的事呢 doing wedding research for you.
她不需要这样的啦 Oh, she-she doesn't have to do that.
她自愿的 毕竟你当过她的伴娘 She wants to. After all, you were her maid of honor.
谢尔顿 说说那个椒盐脆饼干的趣事 Sheldon, tell your funny story about pretzels.
对对 是的 Oh, right. Yeah, oh, yeah.
你们知道我们在考虑 Did you know that we've been thinking
婚礼上准备椒盐脆饼干吗 of having pretzels at our wedding? Hmm?
不不不不不不 抱歉 No, no. No, no, no, no, no. I'm sorry.
是犀牛 我们婚礼上要弄只犀牛 No, rhinos. We're having rhinos at our wedding.
不对 我得走了 No! I got to go.
谁来帮帮我 I'm gonna need some help.
有人把前门也做了婴儿保护措施 Someone baby-proofed the front door.
生
活
大
爆
炸
第十一季 第十二集
谢尔顿 我伴娘的事该怎么办啊 Sheldon, what am I gonna do about my maid of honor?
伯纳黛特还给了我那么多婚礼杂志 I mean, Bernadette gave me all these bridal magazines.
她还把有好看礼服的页面折了角 She even folded down the pages with the good dresses.
我懂 I get it.
莱纳德也曾借过我的《艾德蒙科学玩意》目录 You know, Leonard once borrowed my Edmund Scientific catalogue
还给一些页面折了角 and dog-eared some pages.
再也没折回去过 Never got 'em straight again.
这两件事还真"差不多"啊 Well, that is exactly the same thing.
你"完全理解"我的困难呢 You really understand my dilemma.
其实我还真了解 Actually, I do.
我妈妈想要我让我哥 My mother is pushing for my brother,
小乔治来当我的伴郎 Georgie, to be my best man,
我不愿意 但也不想再拒绝她 and I hate to disappoint her again.
我已经拒绝了她的救主 以及领英网邀请了 I already rejected her savior and her LinkedIn invitation.
我们怎么样才能做出 How are we gonna make these decisions
不让任何人不开心的决定呢 without anybody getting upset?
如果我们把私人感情抛开 Well, what if we take emotion out of the process,
而是用实验表现来打分呢 and base it on empirical metrics?
这样做决定的不会是我们 Then we aren't really making the decision;
而是数据 the data is.
所以我们可以不为 So we can hurt our friends' feelings
伤朋友们的心负任何责任吗 without taking any responsibility?
老娘喜欢 Me likey.
但是我们怎么才能把客观的测量 But how do we apply quantitative metrics
用在选择婚宴这种主观的事情上呢 to something as subjective as choosing a wedding party?
那个决定只是看似主观而已 That decision only seems subjective.
但实际上 In reality,
婚宴上的人都有着十分明确的功用 people in a wedding party perform very specific functions,
而某些人的发挥就是会比别人强 and some will perform those better than others.
-如果我能用超级英雄来比喻 -不能 - If I may use a superhero analogy... - You may not.
行 那我用真人 Okay, I'll use real people.
如果我们需要狗般忠心之人 Um, if a certain dog-like loyalty is useful,
那莱纳德就是最佳人选 then it's Leonard, hmm?
如果需要在糖果盒里 If, uh, having a PEZ dispenser
装满抗胃酸咀嚼片 那沃罗威茨胜出 filled with TUMS is an advantage, Wolowitz, yeah.
如果伴郎的卡车必须要有 If a best man with fake testicles hanging
假阴囊吊在后面 from his truck is important,
那我哥哥就又能进入候选名单了 well, then, my brother's back in the running.
好吧 我懂你的意思了 Okay, I see your point.
所以我们把每个职责 So we break down each of the roles
需要负责的项目拆分开来 into their component parts,
然后为它们设计专门的测量项目 and then design specialized tests for each.
正是如此 妈呀 Exactly. Boy,
要是我以前知道婚礼能有那么多科学 if I had known getting married was going to involve so much science,
我早就跟你求婚了 I'd have proposed years ago.
莱纳德 跟大家说说你的新鲜事 So Leonard, tell everyone your news.
我开始了一本书 Oh, oh, I'm starting a book.
看书对佩妮来说才是大事吧 That would be big news from Penny,
但你以前应该已经读过书了啊 but you've read a book before.
他的意思是写书 He means he's writing a book.
是啊 这件事我想做很久了 I do. It's something I've been thinking about for a long time.
是在讲一个很聪明的物理学家 Yeah. It's about a brilliant physicist
用科学破案 who solves crimes using science.
莱纳德... Oh, Leonard...
不是在写你 It's not about you.
估计是怕侵权才这么说 He probably has to say that for legal reasons.
它们给成了白饭而不是炒饭 They gave us plain rice instead of fried rice.
这怎么可以 Well, no fair!
我今早才骑了健身脚踏车 I SoulCycled this morning.
一碗油腻腻的饭是我应得的 I'm entitled to a pile of fat rice.
要我说 这算是餐饮出状况啊 Well, I would say that this constitutes a catering crisis.
我同意 谁会挺身而出来解决呢 I agree. Who's gonna step up and handle it?
无所谓啦 这也还行啊 Doesn't matter. This is fine.
佩妮 Penny?
啥 What?
算了 我来处理吧 You know what? I'll take care of it.
我是霍华德·沃罗威茨
没给我们炒饭
胖子印度朋友不高兴了
谢谢
搞定了 Done.
你没把人家骂哭吧 You didn't make him feel bad, did you?
其实他听完还在笑呢 Actually, he was laughing.
霍华德 我为你的处理感到由衷敬佩 I'm really impressed at how you handled that, Howard.
没什么啦 Please.
我这一生退了不知道多少食物 I've been sending food back my entire life.
我最先说出的其中一句完整句子是 One of my first full sentences was,
"人家早餐就吃过母奶了" "I had breast milk for breakfast""
抱歉 咱们开动之前 Excuse me, b-before we start eating,
我想先来一段致辞 I-I would like to make a toast.
-好呀 -说吧 - Oh, nice. - ?Oh, nice.
可我想不出来说什么 If only I could think of one.
你们哪位来说吧 Someone else go.
这是你要的针线包 Hey. Here's the sewing kit you asked for.
只花了1分钟19秒 Ooh! A minute, 19.
速度惊人 Quick.
你在给我计时吗 You were timing me?
没错 我最近特别沉迷于计时 Yes. I am going through a bit of a timing phase.
这个爱好会持续多久呢 How long will it last?
让我们开始计时吧 We'll find out.
你要针线包干什么 What did you need the kit for?
那个... Oh, um...
谢尔顿深蹲去捡叉子 Sh-Sheldon was squatting down to pick up a fork
把裤子撕破了 and he ripped his pants.
某人明天要肌肉酸痛啦 Oh, someone's gonna be sore tomorrow.
脑子转得很快 Oh, quick thinking.
如果你以后还要撒谎 But for future lies,
我最多只能"浅蹲"到这里 this is as far as I can squat.
佩妮拿来针线包 得20分 Penny gets 20 points for the sewing kit.
还得减5分 Yeah, minus five,
因为这是我的针线包 because this is mine.
排行榜 伴娘 伴郎
那她也是遥遥领先呀 Well, she's still pulling a commanding lead.
博纳黛特有试着给我们送来针线包吗 Did Bernadette even try to send us a sewing kit?
送了 亚马逊 标准配送 She did. Amazon, standard shipping,
连金牌配送都不是 not even Prime. ?
那我们自己也能买 We could've done that ourselves.
她就是这样说的 That's what she said.
也许我们太守旧了 Maybe we're being old-fashioned,
非要用性别来约束这两个角色 defining these roles by gender.
你知道 在历史上 You know, historically, the best man's role
伴郎的任务就是在战斗中保护新娘新郎 was to defend the bride and groom in combat.
如果这不选佩妮来做 I mean, if that's not Penny,
那我们根本就是在搞笑啊 I don't know what we're doing here.
我懂你意思 I see your point.
好吧 那我们同时开启伴男 Okay, we are officially open to a best woman
和伴女的选拔 and a gentleman of honor.
这些名字真难听 Oh, those names are terrible.
给你减一分 One point off for you.
你给我计分干什么 What am I being tested for?
这不重要 但如果你没通过 Oh, it's not important. But if you don't pass,
现在做的这些也用不上了 none of this matters.
下一项测试是什么 Okay, what's the next test?
忠诚度 Loyalty.
我们得选一个靠得住的人 We need to choose someone who has our backs,
能保密的人 甚至要帮我们瞒住彼此 someone who will keep our secrets even from each other.
我对你没有任何秘密啊 Well, I don't have any secrets from you.
你有秘密瞒着我吗 Do you have secrets from me?
当然有 Yes.
这件事压在我心头上好久了 Oh, that has been weighing on me for years.
快过来抱抱 Come here.
你觉得自己算是个忠诚可靠的朋友吗 Would you call yourself a loyal and trustworthy friend?
我是呀 Yeah, I like to think so. ?
太好了 因为我要给你讲一件霍华德的事 Great. Because I need to tell you something about Howard,
但你不能告诉他是我说的 but you can't tell him that I told you.
别 不想听 Nope. Don't want to hear it.
我一点也不想听八卦 Do not like to engage in gossip.
好吧 我敬佩你的人品 Okay. I respect your integrity.
是不是关于他那条特殊内裤的 Is it about his special underwear?
因为我早就知道了 我只说这么多 Because I already know. And that's all I'll say.
好啦 里面有个木炭屁味过滤器 Fine, it has a charcoal filter in it.
你能过来陪我 真是太有心了 It's really sweet of you to come by and keep me company.
我也这么认为 Agreed. Uh...
听着 我有个秘密 So, listen, I have a secret
很想跟人分享 that I need to tell someone.
但你绝对不能说出去 But you can never say a word.
哪怕对霍华德也不能说 Not even to Howard.
没问题 告诉我吧 I'm your girl. Lay it on me.
真的吗 Really?
你对你老公也有保留秘密吗 You keep things from your husband?
不 我什么都告诉他 No, I tell him everything.
你别傻了 Don't be a child.
好吧 告诉你 Okay. Here it is.
我可以通过手机操控 I can control the thermostat
莱纳德公寓的恒温器 in Leonard's apartment with my phone.
当他惹我生气时 And when he makes me mad,
我就把温度稍微上调几度 I turn it up, slightly.
我都不知道你来了 Oh, hey. I didn't know you were here.
你们俩在聊什么呀 What are you two talking about?
真心没任何意义的事 Literally, nothing interesting.
你真会保守 Oh, you're good.
排行榜 伴郎/伴女 伴娘/伴男
接下来 准时到达典礼 Okay, getting to the ceremony on time.
莱纳德 快点 你得在一个小时内 Leonard, quick. I need you to get me
把我送到亚凯迪亚 to Arcadia within the hour.
火车模型商店正在大打折 The train store's having a sale.
艾米为什么不送你去 Why can't Amy drive you?
因为按传统来说 在火车模型商店打折那天 Because of the tradition that I cannot see Amy
我不能和艾米碰面[应是婚礼前] on the day of the train store sale.
拜托你 去看看医生好不好 Please, please see a doctor.
-下一项测试 -先等一下 - Next test. - ?Just wait one second.
是不是有点变热啊 Is it getting hot in here?
抱歉 我们说到哪儿了 I'm sorry. Where were we?
我们的朋友是否了解我们 How well do our friends know us?
我给我最爱的阿姨打电话... So I was talking to my favorite aunt...
多伊阿姨 对吧 Aunt Doe, right?
完全正确 Exactly.
她最后弄清楚膝盖上的东西是什么了吗 Did she ever figure out what that thing on her knee was?
后来发现是巧克力碎 Turns out it was a chocolate chip.
很有可能 她很喜欢烘焙 Hmm. Makes sense, she does like to bake.
没错 哇 你真是种子选手 Yes, she does. Damn, you are a thoroughbred.
处理婚礼前的怯场情绪 You know, dealing with cold feet
也是伴娘伴郎的重要任务之一 is an important part of being both best man and maid of honor.
也许我们应该测试一下这项能力 Maybe we should test for that ability.
你真的觉得自己会怯场吗 You really think you might get cold feet?
其实 我是在说你 Actually, I was talking about you.
艾米 Amy...
如果这世上我只坚信一件事 if there's one thing in this world I'm sure of,
那就是你的担心是对的 you are right to be worried.
晚安 Good night.
霍华德 Howard.
我看上了这个限量版的沼泽怪物 I've had my eye on this limited edition Swamp Thing,
但我在下单之前 but now that I'm about to buy it,
我又有点犹豫了 你怎么看 I'm having second thoughts. What do you think?
我不知道啊 谢尔顿 这玩意挺贵的 I don't know, Sheldon, it's pretty expensive.
没错 但是如果它让我开心呢 Yes, but what if it will make me happy, you know,
余生每天清晨起来都能看到它在我枕边 waking up and seeing it every morning for the rest of my life?
真的吗 一个会走路的烂沼泽草吗 Really, a walking clump of swamp grass?
伯纳黛特也没多棒好吗 Yeah, well, Bernadette's no prize either!
你在干什么呢 Hey, what you doing? ?
谢尔顿给我出了道题 挺好玩的 Sheldon gave me a brain teaser. It's kind of fun.
一群人共进晚餐 It's about a group of people at dinner,
你得找出让他们不吵架的座位安排 and you have to figure out where they can sit without fighting.
是不是那个草绿先生不可以 Oh, yeah, is this the one where Mr. Green
和吃肉的人坐在一起 can't sit next to anyone eating meat,
浅蓝叔叔 and Uncle Light Blue
身边不能有比他颜色深的人 won't sit next to any of the darker colors?
没错 谢尔顿也发给你了吗 Yeah, did Sheldon send it to you?
艾米发的 我已经做出来了 Amy did. I solved it already.
-真的吗 -真的 - Really? - ?Yeah.
就像对待我的陪审团义务传票一样 Same way I solved my jury duty summons,
直接丢了 I threw it away.
不行 不行 不行 No, no, no, no, no.
橙黄阿姨不可以坐在吧台边 Uh, Aunt Orange can't sit next to the bar
粉红小姐会说 without Ms. Pink saying,
"我滴神呀 你喝太多酒了" "Jesus thinks you've had enough whiskey."
谢尔顿和艾米也给你们出那道题了吗 Did Sheldon and Amy give you guys that puzzle, too?
是的 是我多心 还是他们最近变得很怪 Yeah. Is it just me or have they been acting strange?
是一直怪 不是才变的 I don't think they're acting.
对啊 之前有一天 Yeah, the other day,
谢尔顿叫我带他去火车模型商店 Sheldon made me take him to the train store.
我们都没进去 他就说了句 We didn't go inside. He just said,
"做得很好" 我们就回家了 "Nicely done," and then we went home.
是啊 艾米给了我这个塑料戒指 Yeah, and Amy gave me this plastic ring
叫我保管好 and told me to hold on to it.
-我也有一只 -一样的 - I got one, too. - Yeah, same.
我也有 Yeah, me, too.
不过 被小桂子吞了 But-but Cinnamon ate it.
我明天才能"找回来" I-I'll get it back tomorrow.
不得不说 进行得真顺利啊 I have to say, this is going pretty well.
没错 It is.
如果用人类做试验在道德上是错的 I-If experimenting on humans is morally wrong,
那我不想当个道德正确的人 then I don't want to be morally right.
你们是不是在测试我们 Hey, are you testing us
谁够格当伴郎伴娘 to see who gets to be in your wedding?
-是的 -不是 - Yes. ?- No.
他们在给我们打分 Wha-- they're rating us.
我竟然是最后一名吗 And I'm in last?
别慌 还有时间 Don't panic, there's still time.
这可是马拉松 不是短跑 Look, it's a marathon, not a sprint.
知道吗 这太侮辱人了 You know what, this is so insulting.
我都不想当你的伴郎了 I-I don't even want to be your stupid best man.
-没错 -我也不想 - Yeah. ?- Me neither.
等等 等等 W-W-Wait, wait.
好奇问一句 是谁先意识到的 Just out of curiosity, which one of you figured it out?
是我 I did.
真棒 Impressive.
你好 斯图尔特 Hello, Stuart.
好啊 谢尔顿 Oh, hey, Sheldon.
想喝杯卡布奇诺吗 Can I interest you in a cappuccino?
你何时开始卖咖啡了 When did you start selling those?
有人忘在这儿了 不过还是温的 Oh, someone left it here, but it's still warm.
算你四块钱怎么样 Say four bucks?
不用了 谢谢 No, thank you.
没出什么事吧 Oh. Everything okay?
这个嘛 Well...
我暗中在我朋友身上做试验 I secretly experimented on my friends,
现在他们都不想当我的伴郎了 and now none of them want to be my best man.
也就是些寻常的婚礼破事 So, you know, normal wedding drama.
抱歉 Sorry.
可能得让我那蠢哥哥来做伴郎了 Probably have to use my stupid brother.
准备好他用咯吱窝来说婚礼祝酒词吧 So get ready for a wedding toast delivered by his armpit.
要是你真的不想让你哥当伴郎 Well, if you really don't want to use your brother,
我愿意当你伴郎 I'd be your best man.
真的吗 Really?
对啊 我们是朋友啊 Yeah, we're friends.
再说 这也挺好的 Plus, it'd be nice.
伴郎的英文是"最佳男人"
我从未被称为"最佳" Never really been called the best before.
说起来 也没被称为"男人"过 Or a man, for that matter.
好吧 谢谢你 斯图尔特 Okay, well, uh, thank you, Stuart.
谢谢你的好意 That's a very generous offer.
不客气 My pleasure.
据我所知 伴郎通常会收到一份礼物 I-I understand the best man usually receives a present.
此话不假 That's true.
开瑞坦[抗过敏药]永远都不嫌多啊 Can never have too much Claritin.
你还在解谢尔顿的那道破题吗 You're still working on Sheldon's dumb brain teaser?
老天啊 紫博士是个女人 当然了 Oh, my God, Dr. Purple's a woman! Of course!
感觉太爽了 Oh, that feels so good.
大家好 Hello.
我想我该向三位道个歉 I believe I owe the three of you an apology.
毋庸置疑 No argument here.
通过拿你们做试验 By experimenting on you,
我意识到我伤害了你们对我的信任 I realize I've violated your trust
被认为是国际人道法的标准
可能也违反了《日内瓦公约》 and possibly the Geneva Convention.
说完了吗 Is that it?
还没有 No.
所以为了不再进一步惹恼你们 So as to not upset any of you further,
我已经邀请了斯图尔特当我的伴郎 I've asked Stuart to be my best man,
他也答应了 and he's agreed.
你们仍然欢迎来参加单身派对 You're all still invited to the bachelor party.
他想在好市多超市举行 主题是"光看不买" Uh, he's thinking Costco and the theme is browsing.
你选斯图尔特也不选我们吗 You picked Stuart over one of us?
我本来想选你们其中一个 Well, I wanted to choose one of you,
但你们都离我而去了 but you all turned against me.
选伴郎不是通过计分选出的 Picking a best man isn't about keeping score.
但你们都是我的朋友 But you're all my friends.
如果我不收集数据 I mean, if I didn't collect data,
我哪有办法从你们三人之中选出一个呢 how could I possibly choose among the three of you?
这话还挺暖的 Well, that's actually kind of sweet.
是吗 可能我表达得不对 Is it? Perhaps I said it wrong.
这是你的婚礼 选你想要的人就行了 Look, this is your wedding, just pick whoever you want.
除了你自己 你谁都不必考虑 You don't need to worry about anyone else but yourself.
你也算是为今天训练了一辈子 You've kind of been training for this your whole life.
谢谢你 莱纳德 Thank you, Leonard.
如果有帮助的话 这两人都是半途而废的主 And if it helps... these two are quitters.
你在煮什么呢 Hey, what you making?
我把芝士调味包给撒了 Uh, well, I spilled the cheese packet,
所以我们今晚吃无料通心粉 so we're having mac and nothing.
我就吃通心粉好了 Yeah. I'll just have the mac.
"无料[芝士]"会让我放屁 "Nothing" gives me gas.
你心情为什么这么好 Why are you in such a good mood?
我刚跟谢尔顿聊过 Mm, I just talked to Sheldon.
他为试验的事道歉了 并邀请我当他的伴郎 He apologized about the tests and asked me to be his best man.
太好了 你为他付出了那么多 他应该请你的 Uh, great. After all you've done for him, he should've asked you.
艾米是你最好的朋友 And Amy's your best friend.
她肯定会醒悟过来选你的 I'm sure she'll come to her senses and pick you.
她才不是呢 我们又不是什么12岁少女 Okay, she's not my best friend. We're not 12.
如果她想选伯纳黛特当她的伴娘 If she wants Bernadette to be her maid of honor,
我真的不在乎 I really don't care.
听起来你挺在乎啊 Sounds like you care.
不 我只是觉得不爽 No, I mean, it-it's just annoying.
我们每天都聊天 无时无刻不在一起 You know, we talk every day. We see each other all the time.
她总是在我身边陪着我 基本上... She's always there for me, and basically--
天啊 艾米真是我最好的朋友 oh, my God, Amy's my best friend.
你还好吧 You okay?
不好 我最好的朋友没邀请我当她的伴娘 No, my best friend didn't ask me to be her maid of honor.
老娘气炸了 I'm pissed!
总之 你的行为是错误又残酷的 So, bottom line, what you did was wrong and cruel,
而我孩子的妈莫名觉得被打动了 which the mother of my children finds oddly appealing.
这么说 她仍然想当我的伴娘吗 So she still wants to be my maid of honor?
伴娘 女杀手 随你需要 Maid of honor, hit woman, whatever you need.
打电话吧 Make the call.
听着 我知道这是你的婚礼 Look, I know this is your wedding,
你想怎样都可以 and you can do whatever you want,
但如果你找除我以外的人当伴娘 but if you think anyone but me is gonna be your maid of honor,
那你就是大白痴 因为你是我最好的朋友 then you're an idiot because you are my best friend.
太晚了 伯纳黛特... Too late. Bernade...
好闺蜜 Bestie!
斯图尔特 如果谢尔顿 Stuart, I'm sorry if it's weird
选我当伴郎没选你 让你不舒服了 我道歉 Sheldon made me best man instead of you.
没关系 It's okay.
我好歹也当了两天伴郎 I was best man for two whole days.
谁都不能夺走这一殊荣 No one can take that away from me.
除了谢尔顿 他夺走了 Except for Sheldon, when he did.
不过 要是你想参与婚宴 Although, if you want to be a part of the wedding party,
你也可以当女花童 I suppose you could be the flower girl.
成交 Sold.
女花童不是要让哈雷当吗 Well, I thought Halley was gonna be the flower girl.
那样合适多了 Oh, that's much better.
抱歉 斯图尔特 你出局了 Sorry, Stuart, you're out.
伯纳黛特对我当伴娘没意见吗 Hey, so is Bernadette okay with me being maid of honor?
其实我还没勇气告诉她 Actually, I haven't had the courage to tell her.
我想应该由我来说 I guess I should do that.
是的 Uh, yeah.
不过 身为伴娘 Although, as maid of honor,
你的工作就是为我分担解忧 your job is to make my life easier.
我靠 Damn it.
斯图尔特 你还想参与这个婚礼吗 Hey, Stuart, you still want in on this wedding?
也没那么想 Not that much.
好吧 我去说 Fine. I'll do it.
不过帮个忙 先把酒柜的儿童防护锁打开 But do me a favor and unlock the liquor cabinet first.