早啊 Morning.
早 Morning.
睡得好吗 Sleep okay?
挺好的 Mm-hmm. Great.
我能问你点儿事儿吗 Hey, can I ask you something?
问吧 Sure.
昨晚我想尝试《性爱宝典》 Last night, me wanting to try that stuff out
里面的那招 of the Kama Sutra,
你是觉得有意思呢 还是觉得有种族歧视 was that fun for you or kinda racially insensitive?
就因为你和一位印度女人同床共枕 Yeah, just because you're in bed with an Indian woman,
你就觉得可以 you think that gives you permission
使用古印度性爱手册里的狂野体位了吗 to use crazy positions from an ancient Indian love manual?
喂 你要是能找到一本 Hey, if you can find a book called
《与白人男孩儿的诡异性爱》 我也没意见 Weird Sex With White Boys, I'd be okay with that.
别戴 你的眼睛这么美 No, no, you have such beautiful eyes.
你考虑过戴隐形眼镜吗 Have you ever thought about getting contacts?
我七年级的时候试过 I tried in the seventh grade.
总是戴不习惯 I could never get used to them.
真是可惜 Oh, that's too bad.
对啊 要是我戴上隐形眼镜 我肯定就是 Yeah, if I had contacts I would have been
史上最酷的被关在 the coolest debate club president
自己大提琴箱里的辩论俱乐部主席了 ever to be stuffed into his own cello case.
你要是现在戴上 If you had them on now,
就能看见咱们接下来要做啥了 you could see what we're going to do next.
没 没关系的 我可以脑补的 Th-that's okay. I can infer from context.
嗨 拉杰 想见识一下我最近练的小魔术吗 Hey, Raj, wanna see a new magic trick I've been working on?
霍华德 容我插句嘴 Howard, if I may interject here
给你一条友情建议 with a piece of friendly advice.
难道你的人生 Is working on magic tricks
就指着这些魔术小把戏了吗 really how you want to spend your time?
我知道你只是个工程师 但是 Granted, you're just an engineer, but...
这并不意味着你不会某天做出一个小把戏 that doesn't mean you might not someday build a geegaw
或者小玩意儿能让别人在诺贝尔奖的 or a thingamabob that may get you a "thank you"
获奖演说里送你一句"感谢某人"呀 in someone else's Nobel Prize acceptance speech.
你这魔术能把他变没了吗 Is the trick making him disappear?
好吧 咱们看看吧 Sure, let's see it.
给 洗一下牌 Here, shuffle these.
好 Okay.
正面朝下 摊在桌子上 Now spread them out on the table face down.
挑一张 看一眼 Pick one, look at it.
好的 Okay.
记住这张牌 再把它放回去 Now remember your card, put it back in the deck.
知道为啥他拿不到博士学位了吧 Is it any wonder he doesn't have a doctorate?
提醒我一下 你生日是哪天 Remind me, what's your birthday?
10月6号 October sixth.
好的 10月是第10个月份 Okay, October is the tenth month.
那么10 1加0等于1 1加6等于7 So ten-- one plus zero is one, plus six is seven.
翻开第7张牌 Turn over the seventh card.
我勒个去! How about that!
是你选的那张牌吗 Is that your card?
对 没错 真厉害 Yes, it is. Very cool!
一点都不厉害 It's not cool.
只是个简单的用来 It's a childish trick designed
戏弄傻瓜的小把戏而已 to confuse and intrigue simpletons.
你是咋弄的 How'd you do it?
魔术师是不会透露他的秘密的 A magician never reveals his secrets.
但未来的诺奖得主肯定能搞明白的 But surely a future Nobel Prize winner can figure it out.
好啊 Fine.
让我想想 Give me a second.
你有没有注意到 每次他认真思考时都会散发培根的味道 You ever notice when he thinks real hard, it smells like bacon?
-喂 -不好意思 - Oh, hey! - Sorry! Oop!
抱歉 抱歉 Sorry! Pardon me!
真不好意思 Oh, I'm so sorry!
都怪我 Oh, that was my fault.
看吧 Check it out.
我戴隐形了 I just got contacts.
生活大爆炸 第四季第十八集
一 二 One, two,
三 四 五 three, four, five.
不可能吧 No way.
这张牌就是你挑的 对吧 That's your card, right?
草花7 Seven of clubs!
太神奇了 That is amazing!
一点都不神奇 It's not amazing.
魔术小把戏都离不开 All magic tricks are merely a combination
操纵和误导的窠臼 of manipulation and misdirection
有时候还会有侏儒藏在箱子里晃腿 with the occasional dwarf in a box wiggling his feet.
哦 真的吗 那我是怎么做到的 Oh, really? So how did I do it?
我才不在乎你是怎么做到的 I don't care how you did it.
有更重要的问题等着我思考 I have more important things to think about.
显然这些牌上都是有记号的 Clearly, the cards are marked.
我以为你在思考更重要的事儿呢 I thought you had more important things to think about.
没错 你恰好 I do. You just happened
碰见我休息了 to have caught me on a break.
让我看看这些牌 Oh, let me see those cards.
有啥大不了的 不知道 Big deal. Not knowing
才有乐趣啊 is part of the fun.
"不知道才有乐趣啊" "Not knowing is part of the fun."
这是你们社区大学的校训吗 Was that the motto of your community college?
各位 你们觉得咋样 Hey, guys, what do you think?
普丽娅带我去买衣服了 Priya took me clothes shopping.
哇 看起来真不错 Hey, you look great.
干得好 普丽娅 Good for you, Priya.
我怎么样都没法让他不穿那件难看的帽衫 I could never get that stupid hoodie off him
在我俩还那啥的时候 when we were...
额 你看起来好帅 Well, you look great.
多谢 Thank you.
咱去把衣服都挂起来吧 Let's go hang everything up.
嗯 好 Yeah, good.
新隐形眼镜 New contacts.
我该早几年戴的 I should have done this years ago.
这么说你终于习惯他俩每天都这样了 So you finally getting used to them doing it on a daily basis?
我已经不和他在一起了 I'm not going out with him.
他想跟谁上床都无所谓 He can sleep with whoever he wants.
我在和拉杰说话呢 Yeah, I was talking to Raj.
啊哦 Oopsy.
这副牌肯定做了手脚 This deck is rigged in some fashion.
好吧 换一副牌 Fine. Get another deck
我照样能变给你看 and I'll do the trick with that.
你是说这是一副正常的牌吗 So you're saying this is a regulation deck?
我是说要相信魔法 你个麻瓜 I'm saying believe in magic, you muggle.
我很高兴莱纳德找到了女友 You know, well, I'm happy Leonard's found someone.
虽然没人问起这个 Not that anybody asked.
你有多少件星际迷航的制服 How many Star Trek uniforms do you have?
就两件 Just two:
常服和礼服各一 everyday and dress.
我们得谈谈 Listen, we need to talk about something.
天哪 你是要跟我分手 Oh, my God, you're breaking up with me!
为什么要带我去买衣服 Why would you take me out shopping
然后跟我分手 那太残忍了 and then break up with me? That is so cruel!
莱纳德 我不是要跟你分手 Leonard, I'm not breaking up with you.
哦 好吧 Oh, okay.
那你要谈什么 So, what's up?
我就觉得怪怪的 It's a little weird,
你前女友一天到晚在这玩 your ex-girlfriend hanging out here all the time.
我知道 I know.
我通常跟前女友老死不相往来 I usually never see my ex-girlfriends,
除非她们的硬盘崩溃 unless their hard drives crash.
我只是说 要是我整天 I'm just saying, how would you feel
跟前男友混在一块 你觉得怎样 if I was hanging out with my ex-boyfriend?
不怎么好 我想 Um, not great, I guess.
但我和佩妮现在只是朋友 But Penny and I are just friends.
我不管 I don't care.
她曾跟你上过床 This is a woman you have slept with.
要是你仍想她在眼前晃 If you want her around,
那我不得不认为你仍对她旧情难忘 then I have to wonder if maybe you're not ready to move on.
不 不不 我忘了 No, no-no-no, I'm ready!
我都为了你宁愿目不能视 I gave up the gift of sight for you.
这还不算忘了旧情 算什么 If that's not moving on, what is?
我想让你跟佩妮彻底断了 You need to cut the cord with Penny.
哦 好的 Oh... okay.
你好像不是很有信心 You don't sound very confident.
不 不 我很有信心 No, no, I'm confident.
我很清楚什么叫"我要跟你一刀两断" Its not like I'm unfamiliar with the "get lost" conversation.
虽然 这是第一次我跟人这么说 Although, this will be the first time I'll be the one saying it.
谢谢你 Thank you.
-我很感激 -应该的 - I appreciate it. - Sure.
天哪 你真香 Oh, God, you smell so good.
当然 也有可能是 Of course, that could just be
我其他感官更加灵敏了 my other senses getting stronger.
（《星际迷航》角色 女性）
假设 我能弄到 Hypothetically, if I had access
一件乌胡拉中尉的制服 你会穿吗 to a Lieutenant Uhura uniform, would you wear it?
莱纳德 这是我和我家人莫大的痛苦 Leonard, it's a source of great pain to me and my family
因为我哥衣柜居然有这一套行头 that my brother has that outfit in his wardrobe.
能不讨论这个吗 Can we not discuss it?
抱歉 别介意 I'm sorry. Never mind.
你之前拿的牌就是方块J吗 And was your card the jack of diamonds?
难以置信 Oh, unbelievable!
知道他怎么做到的了吗 Know how he did it yet?
嗷 他跟我小侄子一个表情 Aw, he has the same look my little nephew gets
他想不通为何我鼻子跟他一样时就这样 when he can't figure out how I got his nose.
我还有几个治愈系的小魔术 You know, I have some remedial magic tricks
可能更适合你 that might be more your speed.
比如 快看 Like, ooh, look!
看这铅笔上的橡皮 The pencil's rubber!
我想我知道你怎么变的了 Hey, I think I know how you did the card trick.
拜托 我都不明白 你怎么可能知道 Oh, please, if I don't know, you don't know.
这是不言自明的 That's axiomatic.
我说给你听 Come here.
还真给你说对了 You're right.
对一个不知道什么叫 Not too bad for someone
"不言自明"的人来说 还真不赖 who doesn't know what "axiomatic" means.
你的隐形眼镜呢 What happened with the contacts?
一个在楼上 One of them's upstairs.
另一个好像已经跑脑袋里了 The other one sort of slipped back into my skull.
这是普丽娅给你买的新衬衫吗 Hey, is that one of the new shirts Priya got you?
对 Yeah.
可不能这么洗 You don't wanna wash that.
-不能吗 -不能 这是丝织品 - No? - No, that's silk.
老实说 没有我你可怎么办哦 Seriously, what would you do without me?
是啊 Yeah.
我不得不说 我觉得 You know, I gotta tell you, I think
-你找上普丽娅真是太幸运了 -我也这么想 - you got a real winner with Priya. - Yeah, me, too.
她真是太可爱了 She seems really sweet.
相信我 你可不能觉得理所当然 Believe me, you do not want to take that for granted.
外面可有大堆大堆的婊子 There are a lot of bitches out there.
是啊 找个婊子可就太糟了 Yeah, bitches are the worst.
好了 回见 All right, I'll see you later.
佩妮 我有事想跟你说 Uh, Penny, there's something I have to tell you.
什么 What?
好吧 怎么说呢 Okay, uh, how do I put this?
你了解达尔文在加拉帕戈斯群岛 Um... are you familiar with Darwin's observation
考察雀类时的观察法吗 of the finches in the Galapagos Islands?
有拍电影出来吗 Did they make a movie about it?
没有 No.
那我不了解 Then no.
好吧 达尔文观察到当两组雀类 All right, well, anyway, Darwin observed that when two groups
去竞争同一种食物来源 of finches competed over the same food source,
最终 其中一种会进化出不同的鸟嘴 eventually one of them would evolve a different beak shape
从而能以别的东西为食 so they could feed on something else.
好吧 Okay.
你觉得我们可以从该行为中学到什么 So what do you think we can learn from that behavior
可以运用于自己生活中的 that we can apply to our own lives?
一鸟在手 胜过二鸟在林? Uh, a bird in the hand is worth two in the bush?
当然 这话里也有鸟 Sure, that has birds in it.
跟你说话真有趣 莱纳德 总学得到东西 It's fun talking to you, Leonard; I always learn stuff.
抱歉 那就算你答应了 I'm sorry, but I'm gonna count that.
你睡觉的时候一定要戴这玩意吗 Do you really have to wear that in bed?
对呀 医生怕我睡着之后揉眼睛 Yeah. The doctor didn't want me to rub my eye during the night.
不戴这个 就要戴那种超大的锥形颈圈 It was either this or one of those giant neck cones.
你跟佩妮谈过了吗 So did you get to talk to Penny?
谈了 真的 谈了 Oh, yes. Indeed, I did.
结果呢 And?
她毫无保留地欣然接受了 She completely understood everything I said.
妥妥儿的 Case closed.
她生气了吗 Was she upset?
也许吧 不过与我无关 Maybe, but that's not my problem.
她不是我女朋友 你才是 She's not my girlfriend, you are.
不要对她太残忍 I hope you weren't cruel to her.
那让繁花凋零的到底是秋天的残忍 Is the autumn cruel for letting the flowers die,
还是自然法则呢 or is that just nature's way?
莱纳德 莱纳德 莱纳德 Leonard? Leonard? Leonard?
干嘛 What?!
我参透沃罗威茨的小魔术了 I think I figured out Wolowitz's magic trick,
我需要你来选一张牌 and I need you to pick a card.
我不会给你开门的 谢尔顿 I am not opening that door, Sheldon!
如你所愿 As you wish.
选一张牌 放回去 Pick a card, put it back,
接下来就是见证奇迹的时刻 and prepare to be amazed.
选好了吗 Did you pick one?
好了 Yep.
这是你选的牌吗 Is this your card?
不是 Nope.
我去 Drat.
这张呢 Is this your card?
不是 No.
我去去就回 I'll be right back.
选一张牌 谢尔顿 Pick a card, Sheldon.
瞟一眼 然后放回去 Now look at it, and put it back in the deck.
记住牌面了吗 Now do you remember your card?
搞笑呢吧 哥的记忆力不是讲笑的 Of course I do, I have an eidetic memory.
我的错 My apologies.
现在洗一下牌 Now shuffle the cards.
接着洗 Shuffling.
等我一下 Wait here.
图像处理 交叉引证 Processing image, cross-referencing...
忙什么呢 Whatcha doin'?
我在对沃罗威茨的小魔术进行逆向分析 I'm reverse engineering Wolowitz's magic trick.
红外摄像机能派上什么用场 What's up with the infrared cameras?
通过对扑克牌余热等级的测量 I'm measuring residual heat levels on the playing cards
可以确定哪张牌被摸过了 to determine which one's been touched.
顺便提醒一下 By the way,
如果你打算要小宝宝的话 if you hope to have children,
我建议你把三角小内内换成四角的 I suggest you switch from briefs to boxers.
你的蛋蛋看上去温度略高 Your testicles look a tad warm.
我勒个去 别告诉我你进入了 Holy crap, are you connected
国立橡树岭研究所的系统 to the Oak Ridge National Laboratory?
没错 我正在用他们的克雷超级电脑 Yes. I'm using their Cray supercomputer
分析洗牌的模式 to analyze shuffling patterns.
谢尔顿 那台电脑是供国防部使用的 Sheldon, that computer is used for national defense.
黑进去相当于刑事犯罪 Hacking into it is a federal crime.
别紧张 现在又没人跟咱们打仗 Relax, we're not under attack right now.
趁军方直升机没来之前我先出去躲躲 Okay, I'm leaving before the black helicopters get here.
这张会是我的牌吗 And is this my card?
大爷的 Rats!
我怀疑霍华德用了放射性指示剂 I wonder if Howard used a radioactive tracer.
这么晚了我上哪弄铀-235去啊 Where am I going to find uranium-235 this time of night?
给力吧 Craigslist Come on, CraigsList.
（Craigslist 一个网上大型免费分类广告网站）
带你来印度餐厅算是种族歧视吗 Is it racist that I took you to an Indian restaurant?
没关系 我喜欢印度菜 It's okay, I like Indian food.
或者你可以宾至如归地称它为"菜" Or as you probably call it back home, "food."
你为什么不戴隐形眼镜了 Why didn't you wear your contacts?
不喜欢吗 Don't you like them?
不 不 我喜欢 No, no, I do.
只是我知道今晚要吃咖喱 It's just I knew I was having curry tonight
一个部位的灼痛就够我应付的了 and I only want one part of my body to burn at a time.
知道吗 You know...
公司向我提供了一个职位 就在洛杉矶 ...my company offered me a position here in Los Angeles.
那意味着你会在这里定居了吗 Does that mean you'd relocate here permanently?
也许吧 你觉得怎样 Maybe. What do you think?
双手赞成 I love it.
太棒了 That's great!
吃着呢 Hi!
等我一下 Hi! Just hang on.
世界真小啊 Small world.
你根本没跟她谈过对吧 You did talk to her, didn't you?
当然谈了 我跟她谈啊谈啊谈啊的 Of course, I did. I talked and talked and talked.
莱纳德 瞧你这一身像模像样的成年人打扮 Hey! Look at Leonard in his fancy-ass grownup clothes.
有你的 普丽娅 这是他第一次 Way to go, Priya. For once, he doesn't look
打扮得不像男孩服装部的模特 like a mannequin in the boys' department.
他有没有告诉你 Hey, did he
我挽救了那件真丝衬衫 tell you I saved the silk shirt?
没有啊 No, he did not.
他当时正准备把它扔进洗衣机 He was gonna throw it in the washing machine
和他的蜘蛛侠小内内一起洗呢 with his Spiderman underwear.
这就是咱家莱尼哈 That's our Lenny, huh?
对 这就是咱家莱尼 Yes, that's our Lenny.
这里的东西好吃吗 So how's the food here?
这个真的非常非常好吃 Oh, wow, that is really, really good.
抱歉 你们俩约着会呢 Oh, I'm sorry. You guys are on a date.
咱们有空再聚 吃好喝好 We can hang out anytime. Have fun.
拜拜 晚安 Bye. Good night.
辣死了 辣死了 辣死了 Oh, that's, hot, hot, hot, hot!
是不是有被我盯梢的感觉 Whoo! I really sneaks up on ya, huh?
好了 我消失 All right, I gotta go.
这个真的很辣 It is pretty spicy.
我一直想告诉你来着 Oh, I've been meaning to tell you,
你的小魔术我弄明白了 I figured out your magic trick.
真的吗 Really?
那当然 Oh, yes.
而且我还进行了改进 In fact, I improved upon it.
我很期待啊 I'd love to see that.
你呢 拉杰 How about you, Raj?
边吃牛肉通心粉 边看表演 Beefaroni and a show?
怎么可能拒绝呢 How do you turn that down?
看好咯 All right.
选张牌 Pick a card.
好的 Okay.
天灵灵地灵灵 扑克牌快显灵 Bippity-boppity-boo.
你拿根小黑棒 哔一下是什么意思 What's with the wand and the beep?
小黑棒是用来凸显我的表演能力 The wand is called showmanship,
那哔的一声则不关你事 and the beep is none of your business.
抱歉 Oh! Excuse me.
我刚收到一则 I'm getting a text message
跟这魔术没半点关系的短信 completely unrelated to this magic trick.
我的衣服干洗完了 Oh, look, my dry cleaning's ready.
你手里那张牌是黑桃5 And your card was the five of spades.
看吧 Ta-da.
这些牌上有条形码 These cards have barcodes on them.
那根小黑棒是读码器 The wand is a reader.
能把信息传送到你手机上 It's transmitting to your phone.
我刚说了 "看吧" I said, "ta-da."
看完就得了 Show's over.
这也太悲剧了 That's pathetic.
哥给你演示一下 真正的魔术师是怎么做的 Let me show you how a real magician does it.
拉杰 选张牌 Raj, take a card.
不要让我看见 Don't let me see it.
好的 Okay.
梅花3 Three of clubs.
真他妈给力 Son of a gun,
大师果然是大师 you're blowing my mind!
天灵灵地灵灵 大师给你来显灵 Bippity-boppity-boo-yah!
我受够了 我要去搞点铀 That does it. I'm getting uranium.
你打算告诉他吗 You ever gonna tell him?
或许吧 等哪天玩腻了再说 Maybe. When it stops being fun.
那就是永远也不说咯 So never.
我刚准备去上班 Oh, hey, I was just on my way to work.
没事 这事不重要 Oh, okay, its not important.
以后再说吧 It can wait.
没关系 边下楼边说吧 No, it's all right. Walk me down.
什么事 So, what's up?
我遇到一个难题 Uh, I kind of have a problem
希望你能帮我解决 I was hoping you could help me with.
当然 尽管说吧 Sure, anything.
搬出去 Move out.
什么 What?
不用搬太远 Not far.
如果你想组建家庭 Hey, if you ever wanna start a family,
拉肯纳达那边有一些不错的学校[美国加州] La Canada has some great schools.
够了 我哪儿也不去 Okay, I'm not moving anywhere.
这到底是因为什么 What the hell is this all about?
为什么就一定要有原因吗 Why does it have to be about anything?
一个人请求他的伙伴搬家 Can't a fella ask his buddy to relocate,
就不能毫无疑问地走吗 no questions asked?
看在上帝的份上 莱纳德 Oh, for God's sake, Leonard,
这是因为普丽娅 对吗 this is about Priya, isn't it?
她不想我老跟你一起玩 She doesn't want me hanging out with you.
对 就是这句 我终于说出口了 Yes. There, I said it.
好吧 听着 Okay, look.
我碰巧喜欢你的女朋友 I happen to like your girlfriend.
她也喜欢你 And she likes you.
不 她不喜欢我 No, she doesn't.
是不怎么喜欢 Not really, no.
没关系 我保证从今以后 It doesn't matter. Look, I promise from now on
我会跟你保持距离 I will keep my distance from you.
呃 先等等 Well, now, hold on.
你说的距离是指哪种 What kind of distance are we talking about?
因为我们是邻居 Because we are neighbors.
我可是那种能听见你公寓马桶冲水声的邻居 I mean, I can hear the toilet flush in your apartment.
你还能听见我的马桶冲水声 You can hear my toilet flush?
我不是故意去听 不过很高兴知道 I don't listen for it, but it's nice to know
你的排水管道一切都好 everything's okay with your plumbing.
还有这栋楼的排水管道 The building's plumbing.
莱纳德 我懂的 Leonard, I get it.
你现在处于一段新的恋爱 You're in a new relationship now.
我为你感到高兴 And I'm happy for you.
为什么我们不能握个手 好聚好散呢 So why don't we just shake hands and part friends?
呃 先等等 Well, now hold on.
这样如何 How about this?
我们还可以一起玩 不过是地下的 How about we still hang out, but on the down-low?
你真的是那种人吗 Are you really that kind of guy?
不是 No.
其实当我说出"地下"这词儿的时候 我觉得有点犯傻 I actually felt kinda silly just saying "on the down-low."
再见 莱纳德 Good-bye, Leonard.
佩妮 等等 Penny, wait.
去你的隐形眼镜 Damn contacts.
他来了 Incoming.
-嗨 -嘿 - Hi! - Hey!
你们好 Hello.
为什么这么闷闷不乐 哥们儿 Why so glum, chum?
显然 你不能在美国国家安全局 Apparently, you can't hack into a government supercomputer
给你妈妈打小报告的情况下 and then try to buy uranium
入侵政府的超级电脑 without the Department of Homeland Security tattling
还试图在上面买铀 to your mother.
这真是太糟糕了 Oh, that's too bad.
想明白这魔术的原理了吗 Figure out the magic trick yet?
想明白这狗屁魔术的原理了吗 Figure out the magic trick yet?
要我来告诉你怎么做到的吗 Want me to tell you how to do it?
不用 No.
哥再给你耍一次 I'll show you one more time.
拉杰 Raj?
慢着 Hang on.
这次由我来抽牌 This time do it with me,
这样我才能确保其中没有猫腻 so I can make sure there's no monkey business.
好的 All right.
-红桃2 -我恨你 - Two of hearts. - I hate you.
这样下去 诺贝尔奖非他莫属 Yeah, he's gonna win the Nobel Prize.