天啊 我爱死这鸡肉了 Oh, my God. I love this chicken.
常言道 金肉 银肉 Oh, you know what they say,
比不上免费的鸡肉 best things in life are free.
是是是 我是吃了你不少东西 Okay, you're right. I eat your food a lot.
不如这样吧 Now, how about this?
我也让你随时去我冰箱找东西吃 You can raid my fridge anytime you want.
还真是"良心"发现啊 Oh, that's very kind of you.
等下次我想吃"汁多味美"的一号电池 Next time I have a hankering to wash down a D-cell battery
再配一罐陈年腌瓜汁时 with a jar of old pickle juice,
我会去找你的 I'll come a-knockin'.
拉杰 你没有回复我的婚礼邀请函啊 Hey, Raj, you didn't send your RSVP in.
我得知道你是否会带女伴来 I'm suppose to ask you if you're bringing someone to the wedding.
我再通知你 I'll let you know.
能快点吗 Well, can you make it soon?
有人在打擂台要抢婚礼席位呢 There's a battle royale going on over the seating charts.
擂台一角有伯纳黛特的老妈 In one corner, Bernadette's mom,
而另三角 是我老妈 in the other three, mine.
我最讨厌去婚宴了 Yeah, I hate wedding receptions.
真希望新郎新娘能学学比尔博·巴金斯 Yeah, I wish the bride and groom would take a cue from Bilbo Baggins.
比尔博·巴金斯 《魔戒》人物 曾是至尊魔戒的持有者 戴上魔戒后 有隐身的功能
戴上戒指 隐身 大家就各回各家 Slip on the ring, disappear, and everyone goes home.
你不是挺喜欢盖瑟教授的婚礼吗 Mm, you liked Professor Geyser's wedding.
他婚礼上有个圣代自助吧 They had a make-your-own-sundae bar.
多么令人难忘的一夜啊 Oh, that was a night to remember.
告诉你 有次我从头到尾就只吃了碗坚果 Do you know, on one trip, I just had a bowl of nuts.
总而言之 你带不带人来都得赶紧通知我 Anyway, you got to let me know if you have a plus one.
你不带人的话 位子就让给那位 Because if not, my mom's trying to sneak in the doctor
帮我妈脖子做抽脂的医生啦 who sucked the fat out of her neck.
好吧 行 All right, uh, fine.
我会来 而且会携伴出席 I'm coming and I'm bringing somebody.
库萨帕里 加个伴 Uh, Koothrappali plus one.
你带谁来啊 Who you bringing?
你又带谁来啊 Who are you bringing?!
他带我来啊 你带谁呢 He's bringing me; who are you bringing?
哎哟 好一群多管闲事的美国佬啊 Wow, what a bunch of Nosey O'Donnells.
说嘛 带谁呢 Come on, who is it?
就是不说 I'm not telling.
我是神秘的亚洲人 天机不可泄露 I'm from Asia, I'm mysterious, deal with it.
霍华德 你会弄个圣代自助吧吗 Howard aren't having a make-your-own-sundae bar?
应该不会吧 I don't think so.
那我建议你弄一个 Well, you should.
五成的婚姻都是以离婚告终 50% of marriages end in divorce,
但十成十的圣代自助吧都是以幸福收场 but 100% of make-your-own-sundae bars end in happiness.
生活大爆炸 第五季 第二十集 By aBu 201705
妈妈 爸爸 你们好吗 Hello, Mummy, Daddy. How are you?
还行 没啥好抱怨的 Pretty good. Can't complain.
亲爱的 你肯定行 Oh, I'm sure you can.
酝酿一下 抱怨自然来 Just give it a minute.
是这样的 Listen, uh,
我想告诉你们一件事 there's something I want to talk to you about.
之前我一直没做好心理准备 I wasn't ready until now, but...
现在时机已到 I think it's time.
终究还是发生了 It's finally happening.
你要出柜了 对吧 You're coming out of the closet, aren't you?
我们爱你 也能接受你不同的生活方式 We love you, and we accept your alternate lifestyle.
你别...张扬乱搞就行了 Just... keep it to yourself.
没有 我才不是同性恋 No, I'm not gay.
人家顶多是都市花美男 If anything, I'm metrosexual.
那是什么啊 What's that?
就是 我爱女人 也爱她们的保养品 It means I like women as well as their skin-care products.
好吧 如果你不是要出柜 Well, if you're not coming out,
在印度 板球是非常火热的运动
那干嘛还打扰我们看板球半决赛 why did you call us during the cricket semifinals?
在人海中寻觅真爱的日子 我过累了 I'm tired of trying to meet someone,
我想请你们帮忙我找个... and I think I'd like you to help me find a...
老婆 a wife.
我就问清楚 And just to clarify...
是女性的老婆吗 a female wife?
是的 Yes!
包办婚姻 聪明的选择啊 儿子 Matchmaking-- very smart move, son.
比自由恋爱的婚姻好多了 Much better than marrying for love.
我们当初就是自由恋爱的啊 We married for love.
所以过得多么幸福美满啊 And it's been wonderful!
量子力学真让我满心欢喜 Quantum physics makes me so happy.
恭喜恭喜 Yeah, I'm glad.
如同看着一丝不挂的宇宙 It's like looking at the universe naked.
能打扰一下吗 Hi. Guys got a minute?
行啊 什么事 Sure. What's up?
我想到谢尔顿开的小玩笑 Well, I was thinking about Sheldon's little joke
就那天晚上说我老蹭你们东西吃 the other night about me eating all your food.
那不是在开玩笑 不过... Oh! That was no joke. But...
我能理解你以为我是说笑 I understand your confusion,
毕竟我一直是咱们小团体中的笑话王 as I am our group's resident cutup.
不是吧 你还是小团体中的笑话王吗 I'm sorry, you are our resident cutup?
当然 Yes.
证明一下 Oh, prove it.
敲敲门 敲敲门 Knock-knock.
-谁呢 -插嘴物理学家 - Who's there? - Interrupting physicist.
这改编自插嘴牛的笑话 当对方问牛怎么插嘴 你就用牛叫声[哞Moo]插嘴
-物理学家怎么插... -介子[哞哞] - Interrupting phys... - Muon!
言归正传 我收到了我广告的尾款 Anyway, I got a little residual check from my commercial,
我想了想 不如给你们 and I thought, hey, how about I get the guys
买点感恩礼物当做回报吧 a little thank you to pay them back?
所以呢 谢尔顿 So, Sheldon...
你看 ta-da!
未拆封的经典 A vintage mint-in-box
1975年米果公司出产的星际迷航传送机 1975 Mego Star Trek Transporter
还会有真实的传送特效 with real transporter action.
帅爆了 Hot darn!
你去哪里买的啊 Where did you get that?
斯图尔特的漫画店里买的 From Stuart, at the comic book store.
你孤身一人走进了漫画店啊 You went to the comic book store by yourself?
是啊 挺好玩的 Yeah. It was fun.
我一走进 俩男的立刻被迷得哮喘发作 I walked in, and two different guys got asthma attacks.
感觉真爽啊 Felt pretty good.
这个应该表示一下感谢 This calls for an expression of gratitude.
哟 是不是要给我一个罕见的谢氏拥抱 Ooh, am I about to get a rare Sheldon Cooper hug?
这次不行 不然我的拥抱就掉价了 No, not this time. Then they wouldn't be special.
谢了 佩妮 Thanks, Penny.
不客气 You're welcome.
别担心 我没忘记你 Don't worry, I didn't forget about you.
莱纳德 我给你买了 Leonard, I got you...
一个标签机 a label-maker!
哇 Wow...
真好 No, it's great.
也是全新没开封的 Also mint-in-box. Mm.
我也给你买了个传送机 And I got you a transporter, too!
太帅了 Awesome!
这是专门配我的珍藏版史波克模型的呢 Look, it was actually designed for my vintage Mr. Spock action figure.
那太好了 我们快拆开把他放进传送机吧 Oh, that's great! Let's open them up and put him in there.
-打开?! -老天啊 不行 - Open it?! - Oh, good Lord, no!
为什么 玩具不是拿来玩的吗 Why? They're just toys.
-拿来收藏的 -全新没开封的 - They're collectibles. - They're mint-in-box.
拜托 打开来看看也不行吗 Come on. Can't we open one up and take a look?
不行 No, don't!
一旦开封了就不值钱了 Once you open the box, it loses its value.
我妈也曾教育我 要用这种态度对待童贞 Yeah, yeah. My mom gave me the same lecture about my virginity.
不过我觉得 与其收着发霉 Gotta tell you, it was a lot more fun
不如拿出来多晒晒"太阳" taking it out and playing with it.
你确定要我们陪你见相亲对象吗 Are you sure you want us here when you meet this woman?
确定 Oh, yes.
按照我们的习俗 In my culture, it's expected
相亲时就得带个伴来帮过过眼 to have a chaperone to oversee a first date.
况且我想留个好印象 说了你们别生气 Plus, I want to make a good impression, and no offense,
跟你们在一起 我看上去就像一米八的 but with you guys here, I look like I'm six-two.
我们高中舞会时修女也老是盯着我们 The nuns always chaperoned the dances at my high school.
她们总是要我们保持距离 留点空间给圣灵 They used to make us leave room between us for the Holy Spirit.
印度人也这样 Uh, Hindus do the same thing.
只不过他们留空间给牛 Except they leave room for a cow.
我很欣赏你的种族歧视幽默感 Listen, I love your charming racist humor,
但能不能别在女人面前 嘲笑我的宗教信仰呢 but any chance you could not mock my religion while she's here?
你昨天还笑我吃熏鲑鱼呢 Yesterday, you made fun of me for eating lox.
那不一样 你们犹太人又不崇拜鲑鱼 It's different, your people don't worship lox.
显然你没跟我堂兄妹吃过早午餐 Clearly, you've never been to brunch with my cousins.
包办婚姻是不是双方父母一旦决定 So, arranged marriages-- the parents just decide
你们就得结婚 and then you have to get married?
不是 我有说话权的 No, no, I get a say in it.
不过我相信不管什么样的人来 But I'm sure whoever shows up will be better company
杰迈玛大婶和巴特沃斯夫人均为食品品牌名称
都比跟杰迈玛大婶和巴特沃斯夫人 than the threesome I've been having
在厨房里玩3P要好得多 with Aunt Jemima and Mrs. Butterworth.
请问 你是拉杰什吗 Excuse me, are you Rajesh?
我是 Ah, yes.
你应该是拉克希米吧 You must be Lakshmi.
很高兴认识你 Uh, nice to meet you.
我也是 Nice to meet you, too.
这两位是我朋友 Oh! These are my friends.
-这位是伯纳黛特 -你好 - This is Bernadette. - Hello.
-这位是霍华德 -幸会 - And this is Howard. - Nice to meet you.
-幸会 -请坐 - You, too. - Please, have a seat.
双重婚礼有戏了 I'm thinking double wedding.
库珀博士 Dr. Cooper.
库珀博士 Dr. Cooper?
谁在说话 Is someone there?
在这里 你桌子上 Down here. On your desk.
史波克 Spock?
我需要跟你谈谈 I need to speak with you.
太奇妙了 Fascinating.
唯一合乎逻辑的解释就是 这是梦 The only logical explanation is that this is a dream.
做梦也不是唯一合乎逻辑的解释 It is not the only logical explanation.
比如 你之所以产生幻觉 For example, you could be hallucinating
是因为被某物砸到头 比如说 after being hit on the head by,say,
椰子 a coconut.
我真的被椰子砸到头了? Was I hit on the head by a coconut?
我不想就此做出任何回应 I am not going to dignify that with a response.
先说要紧事 Now to the matter at hand.
你要玩这个传送机玩具 You need to play with the transporter toy.
可这是全新没开封的 But it's mint-in-box.
没错 Yes.
而且开封了就毁了它的价值 And to open it would destroy its value.
但你要记住 你跟我一样 But remember, like me,
也有一半人类血统 you also have a human half.
我不想就此做出任何回应 Well, I'm not going to dignify that with a response.
你想一想 Consider this.
玩具的意义在于什么 What is the purpose of a toy?
给人玩 To be played with.
那么 不给人玩意味着... Therefore, to not play with it would be...?
不合常理 Illogical.
该死 史波克 你说得对 Damn it, Spock, you're right.
我这就开封 I'll do it.
谢尔顿 等等 Sheldon, wait.
你得先醒来 You have to wake up first.
当然 Oh, of course.
先设好相位仪 对吧 Set phasers to dumb, right?
赶紧 赶快 马上 Goodie, goodie, goodie!
这样不对 这样不对 This is wrong, this is wrong.
太兴奋了 可这样不对 I'm so excited, but this is wrong.
我要开封了 I'm going to do it.
我在开封了 I'm doing it.
开完了 I did it.
跟我想象中的1975年的味道一样 That's what I always thought 1975 smelled like.
斯科特 送我下去 One to beam down, Mr. Scott.
遵命 史波克 Aye, aye, Mr. Spock.
启动 Energize.
别坏啊 Don't be broken.
求求你 千万别坏 Oh, please, don't be broken.
瞧你让我干的好事 What did you make me do?!
冷静冷静 动动脑子 Okay, okay, think.
这样完全合乎常理 It's only logical.
天啊 这真是太好吃了 My goodness, that was delicious.
我希望你还吃得下巧克力软心蛋糕 Well, I hope you saved room for chocolate lava cake.
不错嘛 Impressive.
你怎么想到做这个 What goes into making something like that?
其实呢 最开始 Well, you start out by trying to
我是想做巧克力酥的 结果失败了 我慌了 make chocolate souffl? And when it falls, you panic,
赶紧改个名字 当当 就变成软心蛋糕了 quickly change the name, and voila, lava cake.
我们的家长现在肯定很想知道进展如何 I bet our parents are dying to know how things are going here.
一起看看 Well, let's see.
没错 有三通未接电话 Yep, three missed calls.
四通未接电话 两条短信 Four missed calls, two text messages
一次视频聊天邀请失败 我赢了 and a failed video chat. I win!
那我们该怎么跟他们说呢 So, what are we going to tell them?
我觉得一切进展顺利 I'd like to tell them things are going well.
同意 Me, too.
但在燃起他们的希望之前 But before we get their hopes up,
得先弄清楚我们的步调是否一致 we should probably make sure we're on the same page.
好 Okay.
那你现在走到哪一步 What page are you on?
我现在走到 父母不断施压 I'm on the one where I'm under a lot of pressure
逼我结婚定下来 from my parents to get married and settle down
组建家庭 and have a family,
所以我会乖乖结婚 好隐瞒我是拉拉的事实 and I'm going to do it so they don't find out I'm gay.
你说什么 Say again?
我是拉拉 I'm gay.
好比男男 Like... dude-on-dude,
但你是女女吗 but with women?
我知道假结婚的只是一场骗局 I know a fake marriage isn't an honest way to live,
但你一定比其他人更理解 我们的文化中 but you of all people should know how difficult it is
出柜是多么难以被接受 to come out in our culture.
为什么我比其他人更理解 Why me of all people?!
你老家新德里那里有传言 说你... Well, there's a rumor back in New Delhi that you're--
委婉点说好了 how shall we say--
身穿男服 心在纱丽 comfortable in a sari.
我不是基佬 I'm not gay!
真的吗 巧克力软心蛋糕 Really? The chocolate lava cake,
浴室的小肥皂 the little soaps in the bathroom,
而且 你身上的"香水"味比我还重呢 and I'm sorry, but you're wearing more perfume than I am.
那可是科勒和拉马尔的"固若金汤" That's Unbreakable by Khloe and Lamar.
顺便告诉你一下 这是中性香水 And for your information, it's unisex.
玩个填空游戏吧 Fill in the blank.
我爱夜生活 I love the nightlife...
我爱布"基"[舞蹈] I like to boogie.
露馅了吧 Got you.
是跟女人跳 我爱跟女人跳布吉 With women! I like to boogie with women!
真让人失望 That's disappointing.
你就是我想要的带"把儿"假老公 You were exactly the kind of phony-baloney husband
最完美的人选 I was looking for.
谢谢 Thank you.
重申一次 我的"把儿"喜欢女人 And once again, my baloney likes girls.
慢着 W-W-Wait!
在没尝过我自制的香堤伊奶油之前 You don't want to put a bite of that in your mouth
最好先一口都别吃 without trying my homemade Chantilly cream.
好吧 这次我听出来基味了 Yeah, okay, that time I heard it.
天啊 Oh, dear.
两个太阳 没带防晒乳 Two suns and no sunscreen.
你好 谢尔顿 Hello again, Sheldon.
又怎么了 小小史波克 What is it now, Tiny Spock?
我对你非常失望 I am very disappointed in you.
你弄坏了自己的玩具 然后偷换给莱纳德 You broke your toy and switched it with Leonard's.
你应该为自己的行为感到羞耻 You should be ashamed of yourself.
是你让我玩玩具的 You're the one who told me to play with it.
那我让你从进取号的舰桥上跳下来 If I told you to jump off the bridge of the Enterprise,
你会照办吗 would you do it?
如果我上了进取号的舰桥 Oh, if I got on the bridge of the Enterprise,
我死也不会跳出去 I would never, ever leave.
相信我 很快就会玩腻了 Trust me, it gets old after a while.
你必须改正你的错误 谢尔顿 You must right your wrongs, Sheldon.
为什么 我成功蒙混过关了 Why? I got away with it.
莱纳德有他的玩具 而且永远也不会打开 Leonard has his toy, and he's never going to open it,
所以不会知道那是坏的 so he won't know it's broken.
而我得到了一个完好无损的玩具 And I have a toy that isn't broken.
皆大欢喜 Everybody's happy.
错 我不开心 Well, I am unhappy.
《星际迷航》史波克是人类与瓦肯人的混血 瓦肯人是个几乎能克制所有情感的种族
我以为你是来自无情绪星球的呢 I thought where you come from they don't have emotions.
我来自台湾的一家玩具工厂 I come from a factory in Taiwan.
现在快去改正错误 Now, do the right thing.
知道你是什么吗 You know what you are?
瓦肯人有绿色的血液
你是个冷血的扫兴绿鬼 Well, you're a green-blooded buzz kill.
你现在还是赶紧传送走吧 Perhaps it's time you beam on out of here.
好吧 Fine.
我用传送机把自己传送走吧 I will just use the transporter.
哎呀 我忘了 Oh, right.
你把它弄坏了 You broke it.
很好 Very well.
库珀呼叫进取号 请求传送一人 Cooper to Enterprise, one to beam up.
开始传送 Energize.
小小史波克 救命啊 Tiny Spock, help.
要去吃午餐了吗 Ready for lunch?
要的 等一下 Yeah, one sec.
好了 我老妈要是发现 Oh, good. Ma would've killed me
我把牙保持器弄坏了会杀了我的 if she found out I broke my retainer.
我可以跟你谈个事情吗 跟拉希米有关 Can I run something by you? It's about Lakshmi.
好 说吧 发展得怎么样了 Yeah, sure. How are things going?
我们有几个小问题 We hit a couple of bumps.
她住在曼哈顿海滩 She lives over in Manhattan Beach,
我得花一个小时才能到她家 so it takes, like, an hour to get there.
而且她是个拉拉 And she's a lesbian.
你说她是"拉拉"是什么意思 What do you mean, "she's a lesbian"?
还记得每次我们去酒吧泡妞 Well, you know how whenever you and I would try
只要失败了 我们就会互相安慰 to hit on women in bars and they'd blow us off
说那女的铁定是同性恋吗 and then we'd tell each other they were probably gay?
就像那样啊 It's like that.
只是这次 她是真的同性恋 Except this time, it's true.
那她干嘛还出来跟你相亲啊 Then why did she even go out with you?
她想找个老公假结婚来掩盖事实 She was looking for a husband so she can appear to be straight.
虽然这主意 And, you know,
乍听之下挺疯狂的 it sounded crazy to me at first...
但我真的有考虑跟她结婚 but I'm actually thinking about doing it.
这事情乍听就很疯狂是因为 Okay, so the reason that might sound crazy...
这本来就很疯狂啊 is 'cause it's crazy!
霍华德 你有女朋友了 Look, Howard, you're in a relationship.
你当然不用妥协 You know you have to make compromises.
但我要妥协的是 买哪种床单 Yes, but my compromises are about which bedspread to buy
或者今天该轮到谁洗衣服啦 or whose turn it is to do the laundry,
伯纳黛特还是我妈 Bernadette's or my mom's.
跟她结婚很合算啊 It's a great deal.
我和她都能摆脱父母的控制 We both get our parents off our backs,
每晚回家不用再面对空荡荡的屋子 I don't have to come home to an empty apartment every night.
再说结了婚 我就尽情吃碳水化合物了 Plus, once I'm married, I can finally eat carbs again
据说不吃碳水化合物能减肥 控制身材
不用再担心身材问题 and let myself go.
何不告诉你父母 Why don't you tell your parents
你想另寻意中人 you want to try to find someone else?
或许找个睡过的女人比你少的伴儿 Maybe one who hasn't slept with more woman than you.
但这个女人想跟我结婚 Because this one wants to marry me.
我从没找到过想跟我结婚的女人 I might never find another one who does.
所以你真的是在慎重考虑 So you're seriously thinking about marrying someone
要过无性婚姻吗 you're never gonna have sex with?
不敢相信你是这态度 I can't believe your attitude.
你不是向来支持同性恋婚姻的吗 I thought you were in favor of gay people getting married.
没错 我支持的是双方都是同性恋 Yes, to other gay people!
你知道你这话有多"恐同"吗 Do you hear how homophobic you sound?
我才不想要坏的 Oh, I don't want a broken toy.
没事 Nothing!
什么 What?
没事 我说了没事 Nothing. I said nothing.
好诡异 That was weird.
真的吗 他的诡异早被我当正常了 Really? I don't even notice anymore.
我真不敢相信 你们真的不拆出来玩 I cannot believe you guys aren't gonna play with these.
我说了你不信嘛 全新未开封不能拆 Well, I told you, you don't. It's mint-in-box.
我不知道 只是觉得浪费 I don't know. I just think it's a waste.
放心啦 我只看看盒子 Relax. I'm just looking at the box.
你光用眼睛看就行了 Perhaps you should look with your eyes
把你那肌肉发达的汉子手拿开 and not your muscular Nebraska man hands.
你到底怎么回事啊 What is your problem?!
我就是怕你弄坏莱纳德的玩具 My problem is that I don't want you to break Leonard's toy.
万一你摇一摇 就摇坏了呢 Which you probably did by shaking it!
她摇过了 我们都看到了啊 She shook it, we all saw her.
莱纳德 我送你这个 Leonard, I bought you this
只是想让你玩得开心 'cause I wanted you to have fun with it.
我不想它一直呆在盒子里不见天日 I don't want it to sit in this box.
你说得对 You know, you're right.
这可是你送我的 I mean, it's from you,
我不可能拿出来卖 I'm never gonna sell it.
-我这就拆吧 -太好了 - I'm opening it. - Yes!
-是坏的 -什么 - It's broken. - What?
瞧你干的好事 汉子手 Oh, nice job, man hands!
不是我弄坏的 I didn't break it.
估计斯图尔特卖给我的时候就这样了 I guess Stuart sold it to me like this.
没错 肯定是他 Yes. Yes, he did.
这是最最最可信又最最最合理的解释... That is a perfectly satisfying and plausible explana...
要怪就怪斯图尔特吧 Let's all be mad at Stuart!
这玩意老贵了 You know, I paid a lot for this.
我们拿回店里给他看吧 Let's take it over there and show him.
绝对要的 Absolutely.
等等 Wait!
是我干的 It was me.
是我拆开了你的玩具... I opened your toy...
发现是坏的 却没有告诉你 discovered it was broken and didn't tell you.
你为什么要拆我的 Why would you open mine?
我没有 我说谎了 I didn't. That was a lie.
我拆开了自己的 I opened my own toy...
发现它已经坏了 所以跟你换了个 and it was already broken, so I switched them.
那你该跟斯图尔特说啊 You should talk to Stuart.
不能说 我又说谎了 I can't, because that was a lie.
你的玩具在地震中坏了... Yours was broken in an earthquake--
还是说谎 and that's a lie.
真相到底是什么 What is the truth?
我的玩具史波克先生托梦给我 My Mr. Spock doll came to me in a dream
逼我拆开了盒子 and forced me to open it.
玩具坏掉以后 我就偷换了你的 And when the toy broke, I switched it for yours.
后来他鼓励我改正错误 Later, he encouraged me to do the right thing,
而我拒绝了他 and I defied him.
然后我就被葛恩追杀了 And then I was attacked by a Gorn.
葛恩:星际迷航中虚构的物种
好吧 这个我信 Okay, that I believe.
莱纳德 佩妮 我要对你们说 Leonard, Penny, I just, I want you both to know
我很后悔之前对两位所做的事 that I regret my actions towards the two of you.
我又说谎了 That's a lie.
这么说 那个是我的咯 So, is that one mine?
-是的 -那给我吧 我来拆开 - Yes. - Well, hand it over so I can open it.
好吧 Okay.
莱纳德 虽然我的玩具坏了 And, Leonard, even though I don't have one anymore,
我还是希望你玩得开心 I hope you have fun playing with it.
-你又说谎了吧 -弥天大谎 - And that's a lie, right? - It's a big, fat whopper.
我真心希望这个是坏的 I hope it breaks.
欢迎大驾光临 This is a treat.
什么风把你们吹来了 What brings you guys by?
拉杰 华仔跟我说了你和拉希米的事 Raj, Howie told me what's going on with you and Lakshmi.
你居然告诉她了 You told her?
我还告诉所有人了呢 I told everybody.
我们相信你一定会找到一个真心爱你的人 We believe there's someone out there who will love you for you.
其实在这点上 我们各持不同意见 Actually, we kind of agreed to disagree on that one,
但我们一致认为 你不该跟她结婚 but we both think you shouldn't marry this woman.
所以当我在等待这个可能存在 也可能不存在的 So, while I'm waiting for this mysterious perfect match
神秘真命天女时 就该一直单身下去吗 who may or may not exist, I'm supposed to just be alone?
那倒未必 Not necessarily.
我们为你找了个可以相依偎的伴 I think we found someone for you to cuddle with.
我的老天 Oh, my goodness.
你可真是史上最可爱的小狗狗 Aren't you the cutest little Yorkie ever!
他真的是送我的吗 You got him for me?
是"她" 你俩肯定合得来 Her. We thought you two would hit it off.
我俩一拍即合 I think we already have.
太感谢你们了 Thank you guys so much.
一般男用钱包称wallet 女用钱包称purse
来看看你能不能装进我男用手包里去 Let's go see if you fit in my man purse.
异性恋 骗谁呀 Heterosexual, my ass.