你有没有听说过这个研究 它的结果显示 Did you hear about this study that found people
在13岁左右很酷 很受欢迎的人 that were cool and popular at 13
在之后的人生中 通常较难获得成功 have problems succeeding later in life?
我现在就还行啊 我13岁时也很受欢迎 I'm doing okay, and I was very popular at 13.
在学校吗 In school?
不是 在家 Oh, no. At home.
佣人们会给我唱歌 The servants would sing to me,
会捧场我的笑话 laugh at my jokes...
真希望我知道他们的名字 I wish I knew their names.
研究有说不受欢迎的孩子之后会如何吗 Does the study say what happens to the unpopular kids?
你说呢 你每天起床时身旁就有一个 You tell me-- you woke up in bed with one.
你们听我说 Listen to this.
我刚收到威尔·惠顿的电邮 I just received an e-mail from Wil Wheaton.
伦纳德·尼莫伊的儿子在拍一部纪录片 Leonard Nimoy's son is working on a documentary
在他爸爸过世前就开始拍摄了 that he started with his father before he passed away.
主题是史波克先生及他对我们文化的影响 It's about Mr. Spock and his impact on our culture.
演员伦纳德·尼莫伊最著名的角色 是《星际旅行》中的史波克
那他为啥要写信给你 Why is he writing to you?
他们想找尼莫伊先生的粉丝做访问 Well, they're looking for fans to interview,
威尔觉得我挺适合 and Wil thought I'd be good for it.
击个掌 Oh. Hey, high five.
打死都不要 Absolutely not.
佩妮 Yeah, Penny,
你曾有过出镜的经验 you spent some time in front of the camera.
有何建议吗 Any words of advice?
有 别因为导演叫你脱 Yes. Don't take your shirt off
你就真的脱光 just because the director said so.
这是关于史巴克先生的纪录片 This is a documentary about Mr. Spock.
就算真有裸露镜头 也一定很有品味 I'm sure if there's nudity, it will be tasteful.
生
活
大
爆
炸
第九季 第七集
有空吗 Hey. You got a minute?
不太有 Not really.
我跟西哥特人正战得难分难解呢 Visigoths are kind of up my butt right now.
暂停游戏 霍华德 Pause the game, Howard.
叫"霍华德" 惨了 "Howard"? Uh-oh.
先别碍事 西哥特人 Make room, Visigoths.
怎么了 'Sup?
我们得来谈谈重新装修这房子的事 We need to talk about redecorating this place.
不是吧 又来 Oh, no, not this again.
我理解你从小在这里长大 Look, I get that you grew up here
你对屋里的一切有着特殊的感情 可... and you're attached to things looking a certain way, but...
我也想把这里当自己家 I want this to feel like my house, too.
亲爱的 这里当然是你自己家啦 Oh, honey, of course it's your house.
不然你整天打扫它干嘛 Why else would you be cleaning it all the time?
好吧 我换个方式说 All right. Let's start over.
老娘要装修 I'm redecorating.
家具 地毯 墙都要重弄 The furniture, the carpeting, the walls.
老娘要把看了会郁闷的东西全换掉 I'm changing everything that depresses me when I look at it.
试着别让自己也变其中一员 Try not to be one of those things.
我能说一件事吗 May I say something?
是想说我不能换掉墙纸 Is it about how I can't have new wallpaper
因为你爹打小就离开你 你娘还过世了吗 'cause your dad left when you were little and your mom died?
没事儿了 Never mind.
艾米 是我谢尔顿 Hello, Amy. It's Sheldon.
我知道我们已经分手了 Yeah, I-I know that we're broken up,
但我给你留言 but I'm leaving this message
是觉得你可能有兴趣看我 because I thought perhaps you'd like to watch me
在史波克先生的纪录片中接受访问 be interviewed for a documentary about Mr. Spock.
或者我更爱称之为是"史"记 Or as I like to call it, a Spockumentary.
我会在纪录片里讲这个哏 Yeah, I'm going to use that joke in the interview,
你看时尽量像第一次听到那样笑出来哦 so try to laugh like you're hearing it for the first time.
你懂吧 笑到抽筋 You know, hysterically, hmm?
但是又带有一点我已不在身边的悲伤 And with a tinge of sadness that I'm no longer in your life.
我才是想出"史"记这名字的人 I'm the one who thought of "Spockumentary""
而我正像第一次听到那样笑着呢 And I'm laughing like I did the first time I heard it.
你们好 Hello.
你好 谢尔顿 Hey, Sheldon.
这位是亚当·尼莫伊 This is Adam Nimoy.
-幸会 -我也很高兴见到你 - Nice to meet you. - Oh, it's nice to meet you.
我十分钦佩您父亲的作品 I admire your father's work very much.
而能见到从自己偶像的阴囊中 It's not every day I get to meet someone whose life's journey
开始人生旅途的人 也很稀奇 began in my hero's scrotum.
我就跟你说这家伙绝对极品 I told you. This guy is gold.
你在干嘛 Whatcha doing? Oh!
给自己做我爹离家后 我妈去世前 Making myself a bologna sandwich like my mom used to make me
她会给我做的腊肠三明治 after my dad left, but before she died.
好啦 我在想 Okay, listen, I'm thinking
或许房子这件事我们可以有个折衷办法 that maybe we can compromise on the house.
我听着呢 I'm listening.
我们可以先装修一个房间 看看效果如何 Let's just redo one room and see how it goes.
此言有理 That is reasonable.
但装修哪间房间呢 But what room?
-比如这间 -绝对不行 - How 'bout this one? - No way.
不行 这是我跟我妈互动最多的房间 No way, this is the room I associate the most with my mom.
那浴室呢 Then how about the bathroom?
其实我们互动最多是在浴室 I want to change my answer.
好吧 那饭厅呢 Fine. Then the dining room.
我们的确是比较不常用那里 I guess we didn't use it very often.
只有有伴时才用 Unless we had company.
不过在我爹离家后 那就不怎么用了 Which didn't happen much after my dad left and not at all
-我妈去世后更是... -很好 我去挑油漆样本 - after my mom... - Great! I'm gonna go pick out paint samples.
好的 我们就自然对话 All right, we're just gonna have a conversation.
假装没有镜头在拍你就行了 Pretend the camera's not here.
好 但这最好不是精心设计来 All right. But this better not be some elaborate scheme
要骗人家宽衣解带的骗局 to get me out of my shirt.
你跟亚当认识多久了 How long have you known Adam?
几年了 A few years.
他是哪里得罪你了 And what are you getting him back for?
先从你的名字与职业说起吧 Let's start with your name and occupation.
谢尔顿·库伯博士 加州理工理论物理学家 Dr. Sheldon Cooper, theoretical physicist, Caltech.
你对史波克这角色最早的记忆是什么呢 And what is your earliest memory of the character Spock?
《星际旅行:原初》系列中 我第一次看 The first episode of StarTrek: The Original Series I ever saw
是第1季第16集 was "The Galileo Seven."
史巴克在金牛座2号星上降落 Uh, Spock had just landed on the planet Taurus II.
然后我哥走进来 坐在我头上 Then my brother came in, sat on my head,
然后说"吃屁吧" and said, "Eat farts."
那次之后 我就着迷了 After that day, I was hooked.
对《星际旅行》着迷 On Star Trek,
不是对我哥的"菊花餐点"着迷 not my brother's sphincter-based cuisine.
史波克是哪一点吸引到了你呢 What was it about Spock that appealed to you?
我想所有被吸引的人 都是因为同个理由吧 I think the same thing that appeals to people everywhere,
梦想着一个冷酷理智的世界 the dream of a cold, rational world
完全没有任何人类情感 entirely without human emotion.
史波克来自只讲逻辑的地方 Spock came from a planet governed only by logic.
在他家乡瓦肯星上 如果你的哥哥问你 You know, on Vulcan, when your brother asks,
"你为什么要打自己" "Why are you hitting yourself?"
那答案会是 "我没有啊 The answer is, "I'm not.
是你在控制我的手" You're moving my arm."
然后他会回答"太有意思了" To which he says, "Fascinating."
于是你们就一起看教育频道 And then you both watch educational television.
听到他说这类事情时 Aw. When he says things like that,
我就想过去抱抱他 哄哄他 I just want to hug him and make everything better.
我哥对我也很坏啊 My brother was mean to me, too.
你绝对是自己找揍 Yeah, you probably had it coming.
你有任何史波克的收藏品吗 Do you have any Spock collectibles?
我有很多啊 I have many.
但最珍贵的是尼莫伊先生亲笔签名的餐巾 My most treasured is an autographed napkin
来自我体贴的好友佩妮 given to me by my very thoughtful friend Penny.
在第2季第11集时送的 尼莫伊先生在2015年2月已去世
她就在那边 That's her over there.
大家好 Hi!
瞧瞧 Look at that.
不用脱衣服就能出镜了呢 I'm in a movie, my shirt stayed on.
我们能看看那块餐巾吗 Can we see the napkin?
当然 失陪一下 Of course. Excuse me.
拿出来得费点功夫 This will just take a moment.
墙式保险箱什么时候装的 When did we get a wall safe?
在地板保险箱装满之后啊 When there was no more room in the floor safe.
地板保险箱又什么时候装的 When did we get a floor safe?
装了监控摄像机之后啊 When we got the security camera.
还有监控摄像机吗 There's a security camera?
潜水侠 自2012年以来一直保护你家 Aquaman, protecting your home since 2012.
老天 我们在沙发上"做"过好些事情 Oh, my God. We've done things on that couch.
是啊 你不说我也知道 Yeah. You don't have to tell me.
你的岳父现在在这呢 So, your father-in-law is in there right now?
是的 你要帮我说话 Yes. So back me up.
-就说这房子维持原样就好 -好的 哦了 - The house is good the way it is. - Oh, okay. Got it.
在忙什么呢 Hey. What's going on?
你好 拉杰 Hey. Hey, Raj.
我和爸爸在讨论把这面墙拆掉 Dad and I were just talking about taking down this wall.
你确定吗 这可是...一面好墙啊 You sure? It's a... pretty great wall.
好在哪里 What's so great about it?
很抱歉 我尽力了 I'm sorry. I did what I could.
不是吧 你把拉杰带过来帮你站队吗 Seriously? You brought Raj over to take your side?
你爸跟你是一队 Your dad's on your side.
他才没有站队 他是过来免费帮忙的 He's not on my side. He's doing all the work for free.
你真是太慷慨无私了 That is so generous of you.
我想换一队站 I'd like to switch sides.
听着 Look, uh...
我觉得你们不能把这面墙拆掉 I don't even think you can take this wall down
因为它是承重墙 'cause it's load-bearing.
想知道很容易 Well, it's easy to find out.
只要爬到房子和地基中间的夹层 一试便知 Just go into the crawlspace under the house and check.
你的签证什么时候到期 When is your visa up?
这上面不仅有署名给我的签名 Not only is it signed to me
而且这里 还是他擦过嘴的地方 but this is where he wiped his mouth.
现在在大家面前的是伦纳德·尼莫伊的DNA So we are currently in the presence of Leonard Nimoy's DNA.
亚当不算是伦纳德·尼莫伊的DNA吗 Um, doesn't Adam count as Leonard Nimoy's DNA?
无意冒犯 但这可是100%纯尼莫伊 No offense, but this is pure 100% Nimoy.
而因为你妈 你只有50%的种 Because of your mother, you're only 50%.
这也不是坏事 Which isn't bad,
但你用来擦嘴的任何东西只会被扔掉 but anything that you wipe your mouth on gets thrown away.
好了 不说餐巾了 Okay, enough about the napkin.
你里面都藏了什么宝贝 What else you hiding in there?
是不是超想知道啊 Wouldn't you like to know?
-是啊 -那行 - I would. - All right then.
就是一些我的重要物品 See? Just my valuables.
我的护照 我的威尔[遗嘱] My passport, uh, my Will...
-你还立好遗嘱啦 -是啊 - You have a will? - Yeah--
1:18真人比例的威尔·惠顿手办 my 1/18 scale Wil Wheaton action figure.
里面也有另一种遗嘱[威尔] I also have the other kind of will,
里面写着把我的小威尔赠送给威尔 and in it I will my Wil back to Wil.
威尔会想要吗 Will Wil want it?
威尔不想要 Wil won't.
戒指盒里面的是什么 What's that ring box?
那是一枚订婚戒指 Oh. That is an engagement ring
我本来打算送给我女朋友艾米的 that I was going to give my girlfriend Amy.
什么 What?!
你给她买了戒指啊 You bought her a ring?
不 这是我祖上一代代传下来的 No, no, no. This has been in my family for generations.
除了中间有一小段时间 印第安人 Except for a short time when Comanches cut off
把我曾曾曾祖母的手指切下来 把戒指偷走 my great-great-great-grandmother's finger and stole it.
-谢尔顿 这太惨了 -不 - Sheldon, that's awful. - No.
德州游骑兵追到他们的村子里 The Texas Rangers tracked them down to their village
把整个村子给屠了 一个活口都没留 and slaughtered every last one of them, so...
所以这是个皆大欢喜的结局 it was a happy ending.
至少我的九指祖母欢喜了 Well, for my nine-fingered Nana.
说回戒指 艾米知道这事吗 Okay, back to the ring. Does Amy even know about this?
不 我还没来得及提 No. She broke up with me
她就跟我分手了 before I could broach the subject.
真遗憾 你一定觉得天都塌了吧 Oh, man, I'm sorry-- that must have been devastating for you.
完全没有 我没事 No, not at all. No, I'm fine.
艾米对我们的感情持保留态度 You know, Amy had reservations about our relationship,
所以这就是最好的结果 so all worked out for the best.
-我知道 可... -都说了我没事 - I know. It just... - I said I'm fine!
我们有点跑题了 We've gotten a little off-topic.
就让我来说个笑话 Allow me to make things entertaining again
给这部"史"记增加点娱乐性 in this little Spockumentary.
那是莱纳德想的笑话 That was Leonard's joke.
小时候当我面临两难处境时 As a child, when faced with a dilemma,
我母亲会鼓励我问 "耶稣会怎么做" my mother encouraged me to ask, "What would Jesus do?"
答案永远都是 "爱邻如爱己" The answer to that was always, "Love thy neighbor."
但我的邻居有一颗烂牙 所以... But my neighbor had a dead tooth, so...
我不可能爱他 that wasn't going to happen.
但... But...
也因此我把问题改成 "史波克会怎么做" that's why I changed it to, "What would Spock do?"
你觉得对你有帮助吗 Did you find that helpful?
对啊 比如三年前 Yes. Oh, for example, three years ago
当我发现佩妮总吃掉我所有果塔饼干 when I discovered Penny was eating all my Pop-Tarts,
我没有生气或怀恨在心 instead of getting angry or vindictive,
反之我装了一个地板保险箱 you know, I got a floor safe.
我就知道我有闻到饼干味 I knew I could smell 'em.
不如从你小时候说起 What about from when you were a kid?
好的 在我八岁的时候 Oh, certainly. Uh, when I was eight years old,
比利·斯帕克斯在操场上把我逼到角落 Billy Sparks cornered me in the playground.
我就问我自己 "史波克会怎么做" I asked myself, "What would Spock do?"
然后我抓住比利的肩膀 Then I grabbed Billy on his shoulder
使出了我人生第一次瓦肯掐脖术 and performed my first Vulcan nerve pinch.
掐脖术是瓦肯人的一种身体对抗技巧 由伦纳德·尼莫伊本人亲自发明
管用吗 Did it work?
没用啊 他把我锁骨弄断了 Oh, no-- he broke my collarbone.
现在一动还会咯咯响 I can still hear it click.
那一定让你非常失望 That must have been very upsetting for you.
完全没有 Oh, not at all.
我前面就说了 效仿史波克的重点 As I said, the entire point of emulating Spock
就是克服人类情绪 was to rise above human emotion,
而我已花一生的时间来掌握它 which I've spent a lifetime mastering.
怎么回事 Excuse me?
抱歉 当我不在 I'm sorry. I'm not here.
不 你这样是啥意思 No. You went . What does mean?
你的确那样了 You did go.
好吧 谢尔顿 我虽然不是专家 All right, fine. Well, Sheldon, I'm no expert,
但你好像完全没抓住史波克的重点 but aren't you completely missing the point of Spock?
他喜欢表现得好像自己没有情感 I mean, he liked to act like he had no emotions,
但他仍是半个人类 but he was still half human.
就像你 Just like you.
我的意思是 你假装你没有 I'm just saying, you pretend you don't,
但你也是有情绪的人 就像其他人一样 but you have feelings just like everybody else.
不对 你看我 Not true. No, look at me.
我本来要向一位女孩求婚 I had an engagement ring to give a girl,
但在求婚之前 她就先跟我分手了 and instead, she rejected me.
我有对此情绪激动吗 没有 And am I emotional about that? No.
相反我坐在沙发上 No, I am sitting here on a couch,
若无其事般地谈论我最爱的电视角色 talking about my favorite TV character like nothing happened.
因为我跟他一模一样 'Cause I am just like him:
由始至终保持理智 all logical, all the time.
亲爱的 你已经开始嚷嚷了 Sweetie, you're yelling.
因为当我用正常音量讲话时 Because when I speak at a regular volume,
都没人相信 no one seems to believe me
我已经把艾米的这破事抛诸脑后了 that I've put this Amy nonsense behind me!
这部纪录片的精彩度绝对爆表 This documentary is gonna be awesome.
-你在下面没事吧 -没事 - You gonna be okay down here? - Yeah. Yeah,
我觉得自己好像考古学家 I feel like an archaeologist.
印第安纳·琼斯之单户家庭房历险 Indiana Jones and the Single-Family Dwelling.
看 Hey. Look!
我找到一个贝壳 Found a seashell.
那是死老鼠的头盖骨 Yeah, that's a rat skull.
别紧张 Relax.
这里动物屎尿够多了 你别再给我们增加 There's enough droppings down here without you making more.
抱歉 你知道我们现在大概到哪里了吗 Sorry. Do you have a... sense of where we are?
知道 我想那里应该是小室吧 Yeah. I think that's the den.
好 我们应该是在餐厅下面了 Okay, so we must be under the dining room.
没错 Yep.
我知道你不想听到这个 You know, I know you don't want to hear this,
但如果把那个小室改造成婴儿室 but it wouldn't take that much work to turn that den
花不了什么功夫 into a nursery.
我为什么不想听到这个呀 Why wouldn't I want to hear it?
因为妮妮说你不想要孩子 'Cause Bernie said you didn't want kids.
完全不是 That's not true at all.
我非常希望她怀孕 相信我 I-I wish she'd get pregnant, believe me.
我一有机会就往她身上爬 I'm climbing on top of her every chance I get.
当然是以一种充满爱与恭敬的方式 In a... loving and respectful manner.
重点是 The point is,
我真的很想要孩子 I really do want kids.
我不知道她为什么要骗你 I don't know why she's lying to you.
她才是不想要孩子的那个 She's the one who doesn't want kids.
事实上 每次我提到这事 In fact, every time I bring up the subject...
地震来了 Earthquake!
我的天 我们死定了 Oh, my God, we're gonna die!
余震来了 Aftershock...!
我不敢相信谢尔顿本来打算向艾米求婚 I can't believe Sheldon was gonna ask Amy to marry him.
我知道 I know.
我更不敢相信他目睹了我们在沙发上"做"的事 I also can't believe he watched what we did on that couch
-还敢坐在上面 -是呀 - and still sits on it. - Yeah.
你们好 Hello.
老兄 你还好吗 Hey, buddy. How you doing?
好多了 Better.
-威尔和亚当走了吗 -走了 - Did Wil and Adam leave? - Yeah.
你觉得他们会在片里留下我暴怒的片段吗 Do you think they're going to put my outburst in the documentary?
-肯定了 -绝对的 - Definitely. - Oh, yeah.
我也不需要纠结这事 Well, there's no point in dwelling on it.
借用一句瓦肯人的俗语 As the Vulcans say,
"人已杀 你无力还命"[瓦肯语] "Kup-fun-tor ha'kiv na'ish du stau."
-你懂他的意思吗 -不懂 - Do you know what that means? - No.
你说的是实话吗 Are you telling the truth?
非也[瓦肯语] Nirsh.
这一切都太荒唐了 Well, this is ridiculous.
总是为艾米的事伤心不能解决任何问题 Being upset about Amy all the time isn't accomplishing anything.
如果我想解决这件事 If I want to resolve this situation,
我就要行动起来 then I need to take action.
你要干什么 What are you gonna do?
我要去找她 向她求婚 I'm going to find her and ask her to marry me.
如果她答应了 我们就把这事彻底忘掉 And if she says yes, we can put this behind us
重新开始我们的关系 and resume our relationship.
如果她不肯答应 And if she says no...
那她就可以去自尽了[瓦肯语] well, then she can just ponfo miran.
他不是真心的 He didn't meant that.
也许我该解释下我为什么撒了个小谎 So I should probably explain why I kind of fibbed.
那想必是极好的 That would be nice.
我告诉我爸你不想要孩子 I told my dad that you were the one who didn't want kids
是因为我不想让他失望 because I didn't want to disappoint him.
让我当替死鬼 你就忍心吗 But you were okay throwing me under the bus?
事实证明 我对此毫不犹豫 Turns out yeah, I didn't think twice about it.
妮妮 你不用担心我 Bernie, you don't need to worry about me.
但是我不想看你错过这一切 But I don't want to see you miss out.
养育孩子是我人生中最获益匪浅的体验 Raising children was the most rewarding experience of my life.
得了吧 啥都是我妈干的 Oh, please. Mom did everything.
你只不过是每天下班回家 All you did was come home from work,
坐在沙发上喝啤酒 sit on the couch and drink beer.
这算哪门子养育孩子 How is that raising kids?
这话题看来只适合夫妻俩谈 This is really a conversation for husband and wife.
我这个外人还是洗洗回家吧 I'm gonna go clean up, hit the road.
如果你妈问起 我晚上10点才离开这里 If your mother asks, I was here till 10:00.
真有趣 你爸爸不太做家务 It's interesting your father didn't help around the house
霍华德也不爱做家务 and Howard doesn't help, either,
所以从某种程度来说 so... in a way,
霍华德不光是像你爸爸 Howard's not only like your father,
他还像是你不敢生的孩子一样 but he's also like the child that you're afraid to have.
你怎么还不滚啊 Why are you still here?
好吧 我走了 Fine, I'll leave.
不过某人好像需要换尿布啦 But it sounds like somebody needs a fresh diaper.
好吧 All right...
我承认 I admit...
我的确不怎么帮忙干家务 that I don't help out a lot.
我需要改进这一点 And I need to work on that.
但是 But...
如果我们有了孩子 if we had a kid,
一切都会不一样 it would be different.
-为什么 -因为 - Why? - Because...
当我爸离开时 when my dad left,
我对自己保证说 I promised myself that...
如果我有机会做爸爸 if I ever had a chance to be a father...
我一定陪在孩子身边 I'd always be there.
好吧 我会考虑的 Okay, I'll think about it.
你这是认真考虑 And this an actual "I'll think about it,"
而不是像"我们能买辆带跨斗的摩托车吗" not like the "Can we get a motorcycle with a sidecar
那样的"考虑一下"吧 I'll think about it"?
我是真的会认真考虑的 It's an actual "I'll think about it."
我相信我会成为一位好爸爸 I really believe I'd be a great dad.
我也相信你会 I know you would.
既然说到 Speaking of...
生宝宝 不如我马上洗漱一下 making babies, what do you say I wash up
然后戳戳你的小通道好不好啊 and poke around your crawlspace?
达娜医生觉得他没有那么危险 Dr. Dana feels he isn't that dangerous.
我凭什么相信你而不相信一位医生的话 What makes you right and a trained psychiatrist wrong?
因为她有情感 而我没有 Because she feels. I don't.
我只按逻辑做事 All I know is logic.
切 鬼才相信 Yeah, right.
你能就这样把情感大门关上 You can just shut your feelings off.
电视又一次欺骗了我们 There goes television, lying to us again.
我们让你养育我们的孩子 We let you raise our children,
结果你就这样报答我们 and this is the thanks we get.
莱纳德 我怎么能这么蠢 Leonard, how could I have been so foolish
试图去追随一个虚构的 to try and follow in the footsteps
没有情感的外星人种族的脚步 of a made-up alien race with no emotions?
除了崇拜科幻人物 你还可以 Well...now instead of idolizing fictional characters,
把注意力放在身边的真实人物上啊 you can focus on the real people who are already in your life.
好一句至理名言 Those are very wise words.
谢谢 Thank you.
如果来自电视里 They'd just be so much more comforting
听起来就更安慰人了 if they came out of a television.