那天晚上 我正开着车 So I'm driving my car the other night,
知道发生什么了吗 and what do you think happens?
我撞到了电线杆上 I crashed into a utility pole.
更惨的是 Then, to add insult to injury...
我被电打了 I was electrocuted.
真是无语 What can I say?
就那么发生了 It was one of those days.
所有邻居都听到了 All my neighbors heard it happen,
她们很快放下了卷饼 so they quickly left their microwaved burritos...
价格不菲的润肤霜 And their expensive jars of moisturizer...
计费电影 And their racy pay-per-view movies...
冲到外面 And they hurried outside,
想知道究竟发生了什么事 excited to see what all the ruckus was about.
她们看到是我时 But then, when they saw it was me,
奇怪的事情发生了 this weird thing happened.
片刻寂静 大家站着不动 For a moment, no one moved or said anything.
只是盯着我 They just stared.
然后 And then...
天哪 Oh, my god.
大家一阵躁动 All hell broke loose.
有人懂心肺复苏吗 Does anybody know C.P.R.?
这里发生了意外 There's been an accident.
伊迪 Edie!
能听到我说话吗 Can you hear me?
是的 大家都开始关心我 Yes, everyone suddenly became very concerned,
这很让我感动 which was touching,
但最终还是无济于事 but ultimately pointless.
急救车到达之前 Moments before the ambulance finally arrived,
我听到有人小声说 I heard someone whisper...
伊迪 不要担心 Don't worry, Edie.
会过去的 你会没事的 You're gonna get through this. You're gonna be just fine.
苏珊·梅尔 又错了 Susan Mayer... wrong again.
两秒之后 Two seconds later, it happened.
在所有邻居的注视下 With all of my neighbors surrounding me,
我咽下了最后一口气 I took my last breath.
也有好的一面 The good news?
虽然我死了 I died just like I lived...
但仍像活着一样 是大家瞩目的焦点 As the complete and utter center of attention.
在我升天两日之后 Two days after I kicked the proverbial bucket,
我丈夫让邻居们帮个忙 my husband asked my neighbors to do me a favor.
从她们的表情 你可以看出 You could tell from the looks on their faces
她们并不情愿 it wasn't something they... wanted to do,
但 她们最后还是答应了 but... they agreed to do it anyway.
然后第二天 她们聚在车里 So the next day, they piled into a car
带着两个装满咖啡的保温瓶 with two thermoses filled with coffee,
一个装满烤饼的篮子 a basket filled with baked goods
还有一个装有我的骨灰缸 and an urn that was filled with... me.
真讨厌我们要这么做 I hate that we have to do this.
你已经说过了 我是说 这是一个亲人应该做的 So you've said. I mean, it really is the kind of thing a relative should do.
也许吧 但我们已经在去那的路上了 Maybe it is, but we're in the car, on our way there,
还是别抱怨了 那你至少该把广播打开吧 so stop your bitching. Well, can you at least put the radio on?
如果我能跟着唱歌什么的话 就不会感觉有抱怨了 I won't feel like bitching if I can sing along to something.
你要唱的话 我就开始抱怨 If you start singing, I'll start bitching,
你不想吧 要坐4个小时的车 and you don't want that. It's a 4-hour drive.
我们要做点事来消磨时间 We have to do something to pass the time.
我有个建议 为什么不谈谈伊迪呢 Here's a thought. Why don't we talk about Edie?
说什么 And say what?
不知道 但她是我们在车上的原因 I don't know, but she is the reason we're on this trip.
也许我们可以谈谈有关她的回忆 Uh, maybe we could share memories or tell stories.
那就从 Mm. Why don't you start with the time
她试图偷你那昏迷不醒的男朋友开始吧 she tried to steal your comatose boyfriend?
有意思 我在想 That was fun. Okay, I was thinking
伊迪的一些积极方面的事 of stories that put Edie in a positive light.
5分钟就说完了 然后呢 And after that five minutes is up, then what do we do?
她死了 我们尊敬下她吧 The woman is dead, people. Let's honor her memory.
我们都想说些好的事 Well, I'm all for saying a few nice things...
但你们从没做过真正的朋友 But you were never really friends.
你跟伊迪从一开始就势不两立 You and Edie clashed right from the start.
是啊 Yeah.
每个人都这么想 That's what everybody thinks.
但我们第一次见面时 But the the first time we met,
本以为是要成为好朋友的 it seemed like we'd end up being the best of friends.
真恶心 Oh, that's disgusting.
没啥 No, it's okay.
它掉在了袋子上 It landed on the detergent box.
拿去 Here.
再去买个新鲜的面包圈 You go buy yourself a fresh doughnut
或是能缓解疼痛的酒啊之类的东西 or booze, crack, whatever eases the pain.
把它扔了 Just move it along.
你认为我是流浪汉吗 不是 Uh, you think I'm homeless. Oh, no, no, no.
我住这里 No, I live here.
我可以证明 I-I can prove it.
这垃圾袋里我都知道有什么 I know exactly what's in this garbage bag.
空鸡蛋盒 咖啡沫 Um, empty carton of eggs, coffee grinds,
洗发水瓶 shampoo bottle...
减肥膏 Wart removal cream?
你说对了 我是流浪汉 You're right. I'm homeless.
我是苏珊·梅尔 Susan Mayer. Oh.
都弄干净了 It's all cleared up.
伊迪·布利特 我刚搬进来 Mm. Edie Britt. I just moved in down the street.
我看到搬家汽车了 欢迎 Oh, yeah. I saw the moving Van. Welcome.
谢谢 Thanks.
你是一个人 还是跟家人一起 So is it just you, or do you have a family?
我有个儿子 跟他爸住在一起 I have a son. He lives with his dad.
说来话长 下次我们喝酒的时候可以谈 It's a long story. I'll tell you one day over a Margarita.
你想让我进去喝一杯吗 You wanna invite me in for a Margarita?
咖啡怎么样 我刚煮上 How about coffee? I just put on a pot.
好极了 Great.
你可以告诉我邻居们的事 You can fill me in on all of the neighborhood gossip,
从对面那红头发开始 starting with the redhead across the street
拿着松饼篮子 像个机器人 with the muffin basket. That's a robot, right?
好 我们随便聊聊 Funny and likes to gossip.
我们会相处得不错的 是的 We're gonna get along just fine. Yes, we are.
等等 停下来 Wait. Stop.
能不能休息一会 Could we just rest for a second?
我们才过了4条街 We've only gone four blocks.
好吧 我撒谎了 Okay, I lied.
我讨厌跑步 I hate running.
你之前为什么不说 Well, why didn't you say something?
我们都跑了一周了 因为我们刚成为朋友 We've been doing this for a week. Because we were starting to become friends,
你喜欢跑步 我喜欢 and you like to run, and I like to...
坐下 Sit and...
我们中要有一个人妥协 One of us had to give.
苏珊 你好 你好 海伦 Hi, Susan! Oh, hi, Helen, ed.
我应该介绍你们认识 I would have introduced you,
但她一旦开始说 就没完没了 but once Helen starts talking, she doesn't shut up.
是啊 爱德跟我说过 你见过爱德 Right. Ed told me that. Oh, you met ed?
我很了解他 Oh, yeah. I've gotten to know him quite well.
为什么 Yeah?
我们一起 We're kinda...
做过 Doing it.
做过什么 Doing what?
那个 It.
爱德结过婚了 Ed is married.
我是个顽皮的女孩 Yeah, I'm a naughty girl.
你这么做不道德 No, you're being immoral.
这是通奸罪 You're committing adultery.
准确来说 爱德是通奸 我只是找人上床 Actually, Ed's committing adultery. I'm just getting laid.
忘了我说的吧 You know, forget I ever mentioned it.
这种事我忘不了 I can't forget something like this.
海伦是我很好的朋友 我以为你只是说她 Helen is my very good friend. I thought you just said that she was...
她是没完没了地说话 她来敲门我躲着 She is annoying, and I hide when she knocks on my door,
但你不应该破坏她的婚姻 but she does not deserve for you to be wrecking her marriage.
你要去哪 Where are you going?
回家 Home.
你不再是我的朋友了吗 Oh, so you're not gonna be my friend anymore?
是的 I don't think so.
我以为你不喜欢跑步 I thought you didn't like running.
那要看我是否为躲人而逃 Well, it depends on what I'm running away from!
我是住在那边的小姐 Hi. I'm the whore that lives down the street.
能不能向你借一包避孕套 Could I borrow a cup of condoms?
一包 你确定够用吗 A cup? Are you sure that'll be enough?
我知道你不喜欢我 Look, I know that you don't like me,
但我来是要帮你一个忙的 but I am here to do you a favor anyway.
昨晚我出去吃饭了 I was out to dinner last night,
我看到你老公跟别的女人在一起 真的吗 and I saw your husband with another woman. Really?
我很不想这么说 I feel bad saying it,
但如果我是你的话 我是想知道的 but if I were in your shoes, I would want to know.
不用客气 You're welcome.
我知道了 Oh, I get it.
你觉得我批判过你 然后想报复 So you feel I judged you, and for revenge,
于是想毁坏我的婚姻 you're trying to make me insecure about my marriage.
如果我想报复 If I wanted revenge,
我会加入他们 来个三人行了 I would have joined them and made it a threesome.
卡尔从来不会欺骗我 You know, Karl would never cheat,
跟他一起的女人是 布兰迪 他秘书 and the woman he was with... Brandi, his secretary,
他带她去庆祝生日 and he took her out for her birthday.
又是"我带秘书 Oh, the old "I'm taking my secretary
去庆祝生日"的老路子 "out for her birthday" routine.
编得真经典 Hmm. Nice tip of the hat to the classics.
既然你想谈谈道德 Okay, well, since you're on this moral roll,
我们为什么不去找海伦谈谈 why don't we walk over to Helen's?
我可以介绍你 我们喝喝茶 And I will introduce you. We can have some tea,
然后你俩可以交流 and then you two could swap stories
爱德最喜欢的姿势 about Ed's favorite positions.
我跟布兰迪的行为完全不同 What I do and what Brandi's doing is completely different.
怎么说 How?
我没打算破坏他的婚姻 I'm not looking to break up anyone's marriage.
我只是找乐子 免费餐 I'm in it for a little fun, some free meals
帮一个不快乐的男人度过中年危机 and to help an unhappy man through his midlife crisis.
你真是不求回报啊 Wow. You're just a giver.
行 Fine.
用尽全力来批判我吧 忽略现实问题 Use all of your energy judging me and ignore the real problem.
我来跟你说吧 But let me tell you something.
这方面是我的特长 This is my area of expertise,
我看到那女人的眼睛 and I saw the look in that woman's eyes.
她不是找免费餐的 她要永久占有 She's not in it for the free meals. She's in it for keeps.
你该走了 You should leave now.
苏珊 你知道吗 You know, Susan,
我喜欢帮邻居摆脱苦海 I'm trying to help my neighbor out.
我认为那是道义上应该做的事 I thought it was the moral thing to do.
三周后 我在卡尔的汽车杂物箱里发现了 Three weeks later, I found Brandi's bra
布兰迪的内衣 你们都知道接下来的事了 in Karl's glove compartment, and, well, you know the rest.
看到了吧 伊迪真的很了解男人 Say what you want about Edie, she really understood men.
在这么多年的研究之后 她应该了解 I should hope so. After all those years of research...
我忍不住想伊迪和我一起度过的 相互抨击的时光 I can't help thinking about all the times Edie and I sniped at each other.
我们本来可以成为好朋友的 We could have been good friends.
如果她知道你将为她做的事的话 Well, if she knew what you're about to do for her,
她过去什么事都会一笔勾消的 she'd forgive you for everything.
我的时间到了 谁来拿着伊迪 Okay, my hour's up. Someone else hold Edie now.
我来拿着吧 Mm. I'll take her.
看起来像是猫的粪便 Kinda looks like cat litter.
勒奈特 不要看着伊迪 Lynette, don't look at Edie.
怎么 我会变成石头吗 她又坚韧又狂野 Or what, I'll turn to stone? She's all rough and gritty.
加布 在我们尝到伊迪是什么味道前 Uh, Gaby, before we learn what Edie tastes like...
我来拿 I got it.
我认为好好拿着是对死者的一点点尊敬 I think a little more reverence for the dead is in order.
拜托 我们在谈论伊迪 Oh, please. We're talking about Edie.
我们需要一点点不敬 A little more irreverence is what we need.
给我 Give it.
你们几个还记得轮流带我去化疗吗 Do you guys remember when you took turns driving me to chemo?
没有一个人像伊迪那样 Well, none of you did it like Edie.
勒奈特 Hey, Lynette.
感觉怎么样 Hey. How you feelin'?
还那样 Eh, same.
这是你要的DVD Well, here's the DVD you asked for.
谢谢 如果化疗的时候不太累我会看 Thanks. I'll watch it during chemo if I'm not too tired.
饭来了 Here we go.
伊迪 你好 Oh, hi, Edie.
那是什么 Hi. Ugh. What is that?
这是一种健康的发酵粗米汁 It's a health shake of fermented brown rice,
为了让她好入口 and for her entrée,
还有萝卜 牛蒡根和小白菜沙拉 a salad of radish, burdock root and bok choy.
那水刑官 甜点吃什么呢 Mmm. What's for dessert, waterboarding?
谢谢 Thanks.
我这么坐不舒服 I can't get comfortable.
能不能帮我松下枕头 当然可以 Could you fluff my pillows? Of course.
我还有其它事情要做 Well, I've got errands to run,
我会回来开车送你去化疗 你走之前 能不能帮我把袜子穿上 and I'll be back to drive you to chemo. Before you go, would you put my socks back on?
脚又冷了 My feet are cold again.
当然可以 Oh, of course.
凯瑟琳 你有其它事情要做 Katherine, you have got stuff to do.
让我来带她去化疗吧 Why don't I take her to chemo?
我没关系 It's fine.
好吧 Okay.
明天见 See you tomorrow then.
再见 Bye.
你外套在哪 Okay, where's your coat?
怎么了 5点才开始化疗 Why? Chemo's not until 5:00.
我中间要停一下 Yeah, I've gotta make a little stop on the way.
伊迪 Edie! Whoo!
你来过这 Been here before?
来过几次 你会喜欢的 A couple of times. You're gonna love it. Hey!
喜欢 我有癌症 Love it? I have cancer.
也许我根本就不能用 女厕所 I probably shouldn't even use the ladies' room in this place.
没有女厕所 所以那不是个问题 Oh, there isn't a ladies' room, so that's not a problem.
我 Um, I...
伊迪 我半小时内就要做化疗 Edie, I have chemo in half an hour.
行 那么我们最好先喝两杯 我不能喝酒 Fine. Then we better start drinking. I'm not supposed to drink.
他们也不能在厨房里纹身的 And they're not supposed to do tattoos in the kitchen,
但我说行就行 but I have a bald eagle on my ass that says otherwise.
两杯龙舌兰酒 Two Tequila shooters!
你好 伊迪 瑞吉 我以为你在佛罗里达 Hey, Edie! Reggie! Oh, I thought you were in FlorIda.
没有 他们把一具尸体当成我了 Nah. That was just a body they identified as me.
瑞吉 这是我朋友 勒奈特 Oh. Reggie, this is my friend Lynette.
我想帮她振奋一下精神 I'm trying to cheer her up a little.
你想来两杆吗 Right on. You wanna shoot some stick?
不用 谢谢 Uh... No, thanks.
来吧 你肯定能赢他 Oh, come on. You can totally take him.
不 我不能 看见了吧 我有癌症 No, I can't. Uh, see? Cancer.
不用担心 Oh. No sweat.
我可以让你一只手 I'll play you one-handed.
能让我们单独聊一下吗 Can you excuse us for one second?
我得去化疗了 我有 癌症 我知道 I need to go to chemo. I have... cancer. Yeah, I heard.
你到底想让我干什么 And what do you want from me?
我想让你振奋精神 I want you to fluff your own pillows.
你要开始跟病魔斗争 You need to start fighting this thing.
我已经尽我最大努力在做了 I'm doing the best I can.
根本没有 Oh, not even close.
得了吧 勒奈特 你是我认识的最坚强的人 Hell, Lynette, you... you are the strongest person I know.
你比我还坚强 你有能力做到 You're even stronger than me, and that's saying something.
现在 Now...
我把你带到这 可能有点离谱 I may be a little out of line bringing you here,
但是你要记住你是谁 but you need to remember who you are.
让癌症去死吧 Screw cancer.
你是勒奈特·斯加沃 You are Lynette Scavo.
两杯龙舌兰酒 Two tequilas.
现在 你那个一只手的朋友去哪了 Now... where's that one-armed friend of yours?
我想要来几杆 I'm... wanna shoot some stick.
看来她给了你需要的 Wow. It sounds like she gave you just what you needed.
伊迪干得不错 她总是提醒我这点 Good for Edie. She never let me forget it either.
她坚持说 She always insisted
是龙舌兰酒消灭了癌细胞 it was the Tequila shooters that killed the cancer.
该死 怎么了 Oh, what the hell is that?
不是吧 我们有个备胎 Oh, not now. We have a flat.
也许是个预示 今天不适宜去 Maybe it's a sign we're not supposed to do this today.
得了吧 Nice try.
我们没时间了 We don't have time for this.
有人会换轮胎吗 Anybody know how to change a tire?
给我那个十字扳手 你得告诉那是什么东西 You want to hand me that cross wrench? Do you wanna tell me what that is?
T型的工具 It's the t-shaped dealie
如果你不给我拿过来 我就用它打你 I'm gonna whack you with if you don't hand it over.
伊迪从紫藤郡搬走后 You know, Edie used to live around here
她就住在这附近 when she moved away from Wisteria Lane.
你是指 你们一起骂她把她赶走的时候 别抱怨 赶快弄 You mean when you gals gave her the boot. Less yakkin', more jackin'.
布里 你怎么知道她住哪 Bree, how did you know where she lived?
我有一次意外地碰到她 Um, I ran into her once, unexpectedly...
在一个我从来没想过要去的地方 In a place I never thought I'd be.
布里·霍吉 Bree Hodge.
跟我来 我给你找个座 Follow me. I'll get you situated,
然后再把你丈夫带过来 and I'll bring your husband in.
这就是访客室吗 Is that the visitors' room?
是啊 怎么了 Yeah. Why?
你们难道没有更私密的房间吗 You don't happen to have a private room, do you?
你是指 像个高级房 You mean, like an upgrade,
有沙发 柔和灯光 something with a couch and softer lighting?
那样比较好 That would be lovely.
哦 你在讽刺我 Oh. You were being sarcastic.
是的 夫人 你准备好了 Yes, ma'am. Are you ready to...
不 还没 Oh, not, uh, just yet.
如果能有个高级房间 也不是个坏主意 It's not a bad idea, having an upgrade available.
我打赌这是个大家愿意付钱的特殊待遇 I bet that's a perk people would be willing to pay for.
夫人 这是监狱 Ma'am, it's a prison.
我们能提供的特殊待遇只有查蛀牙 The only perk we offer is a cavity search.
老实说 我不太能接受 Um... To be honest, i-I'm not feeling up to this.
我还是改天再来吧 I'm gonna have to come back another day.
好 反正他还有一个已经预约好的访客 Fine. He's got another visitor scheduled anyway,
所以我至少不用告诉他你来过了 另外的访客 谁 so I don't even have to tell him you were here. Another visitor? Who?
一位女士 每周都来看他 Some lady. She visits him every week.
每周吗 她叫什么名字 Every week? What's her name?
不能告诉你 I can't give you that.
如果她一直来看我的丈夫 我想我有权利知道 If she's visiting my husband, I think I have a right to know.
夫人 抱歉 不能告诉你她的名字 Ma'am, I'm sorry, but I cannot give you her name.
是吗 Really?
因为我认为这是一个值得花钱的特殊待遇 Because I would consider that a perk worth paying for.
看谁来了 Well, well.
你来干什么 What are you doing here?
我想来看你 I wanted to see you.
你没带着松饼吗 And you didn't bring muffins?
不是那种看访 It isn't that kind of visit.
没有松饼 没有应酬 No muffins, no small talk.
我是应该害怕 还是表示感激 Should I be scared or grateful?
我今天去监狱了 I stopped by the prison today.
守卫跟我说你一直在探望奥森 The guard tells me you've been visiting Orson...
她还说 有时一周两次 Sometimes twice a week, she said.
没想到监狱女守卫这么八卦 Oh. Who knew lady prison guards could be so chatty?
你想干什么 伊迪 What are you up to, Edie?
没想干什么 你这红头发的冷酷的人 I'm not up to anything, you redheaded ice cube.
他离我就15分钟车程 He's 15 minutes away.
坦白说 我替他难过 And quite frankly, I feel sorry for him.
毕竟 我知道被紫藤街流放是什么感觉 After all, I know what it's like to be exiled from suburbia.
所以你不是 So you're not...
不是想挑起什么事端吗 Trying to start up something?
他在监狱 He's in jail.
我的胸部是很诱人 但是也穿不过监狱铁窗 My boobs are impressive, but they can't bend iron bars.
谢谢你一直去看他 Well... Thank you for... Checking in on him
也谢谢你回答我的疑问 and for answering my question.
我倒有个问题 I have a question.
你为什么不去看他 Why aren't you visiting him?
我的时间有点紧张 Oh, well, my schedule is just unreal,
我有酒席承办公司的工作 我还要照顾本杰明 what with the catering company and looking after Benjamin.
看来我们都很忙 Yeah, well, we're all busy.
得了吧 Come on.
你为什么还不去看他 Why haven't you been to see him?
那监狱 That jail is...
让我恶心 It's disgusting.
关在铁笼的男人们 就像野兽一样 All those men in cages, like animals.
甚至踏入那个地方 都让我觉得羞耻 Even to step foot in that place is humiliating.
你丈夫是为了你才进了监狱 That man went to jail for you.
你知不知道 他要有多爱你 才能做到这步 Do you have any idea how much he must love you?
我知道 I do.
那你为什么不能忍一忍 每月抽出一天 进去看看他 Then why can't you suck it up once a month and go and say hi?
帮他度过这段艰难日子 Try to help him get through this living nightmare.
你为什么不能做到 Why can't you do that?
我现在想想 Now as I think about it,
你还是别去了 don't visit him.
他能做的比你好多了 He can do so much better than you.
所以 你怎么样 So... how are you doing?
你觉得呢 How do you think?
你是对的 我不应该问 You're right. I shouldn't have asked.
我知道这很可怕 I know it's horrible here.
你怎么会知道 How would you know?
你又没进来过 You've never been.
你有理由恨我 You have every right to hate me.
不用演戏 There's no need to be melodramatic.
我是指 坚持让你到这来 I meant for asking you to come here,
坚持让你自首 for insisting you turn yourself in.
现在我看到这个鬼地方了 我不知道我当时是怎么想的 Oh. Now that I see this place, I don't know what I was thinking.
你当时认为 You were thinking
我需要为我所做的事情负起责任 I needed to take responsibility for what I did,
你是对的 and you were right.
但 让你做出这样的牺牲 But still, asking you to make this sacrifice and not...
我却 Ever...
从未来看过你 Coming to see you...
你要怎么样才能原谅我 How can you ever forgive me?
等我出狱 Just be there when I get out.
我从来没告诉过你们 因为我觉得很难堪 I never told you about that because... I was embarrassed.
伊迪·布利特让你觉得很羞愧 使你成为好人 Yeah, Edie Britt shamed you into being a better human being.
确实很难堪 That is embarrassing.
好了 女士们 我们可以走了 All right, ladies, we're ready to ride.
好 我们还有段路要赶 Good. We got some ground to make up.
希望天黑前我们能到 I was hoping we would be able to get there before dark.
你觉得我们告诉他的时候 他会什么反应呢 你觉得呢 How do you think he'll react when we tell him? How do you think?
我从不认为伊迪喜欢乱来 I never thought Edie would be cremated.
我觉得她想要的是 I figured she'd wanna be
身体里注满化学品 风干保存 pumped full of chemicals and preserved.
过去15年 她不就已经这么做了吗 Isn't that what she did for the last 15 years?
我的想法是 伊迪知道 如果她要被下葬 My theory... Edie knew if she was buried,
她真实的出生日期就要被刻到墓碑上 her true date of birth would be carved into a tombstone
全世界的人就都知道了 你认为她真的会花那么多时间来 for all the world to see. You really think she spent a lot of time
想她自己的死吗 thinking about her death?
我想 她会想的 Yeah, I do.
我曾一整晚上都和她在一起 I spent a night with her
我和卡洛斯刚离婚的时候 right after Carlos and I got divorced.
这是不是太红了 我觉得我要粉嫩一点 Is this too red? I think I need something pinker.
好啦 快点吧 It's fine. Hurry up.
我想趁蜜蜡脱毛还新鲜的时候到酒吧 I want to get to the club while this bikini wax is still fresh.
一定会很好玩 This is gonna be fun.
我不能想象咱们从没一起出去玩过 I can't believe we've never gone out on the town together.
我们以前从来没一起单身过 Well, we've never been single together before.
我替酒吧里的那些女孩们难过 Oh, I feel so sorry for all those other girls in the bar.
我也是 Oh, so do I.
公平起见 我们也许应该倒着走 To be fair, we should probably walk in backwards.
不 可能没用 Oh, no, that won't work.
我们是无人能挡的 We're an unstoppable team.
紫藤郡最火辣双枪姐妹花 Mm, the hottest chicks on Wisteria Lane.
别这么说 Oh, be nice.
咱们这还是有很多漂亮姑娘的 There are lots of attractive women on the street.
比如谁 Like who?
比如布里 How about Bree?
她那个头发颜色 Uh, with that hair color,
你可以给她脸上再装个红鼻子 you could stick a red nose on her,
她就能参加马戏团了 and she could join the circus.
勒奈特很漂亮 Lynette's beautiful.
她也太能生了吧 Mm, for a baby factory.
那苏珊呢 我们是最漂亮的 好吗 And Susan? We're the hottest, okay?
太过了吗 Wow. Too much?
不 很漂亮 No, it's great.
好了 咱们走吧 All right. Come on. Let's go.
这地方太棒了 Wow! You were right about this place.
就跟你说很棒吧 俊男美女很多 Told ya. A lot of hotties, very few "notties."
女士们 这是 Ooh. Ladies, this is
酒吧里面那位先生送的 from the gentleman at the end of the bar.
我才刚坐下 Oh, and I just sat down.
这就是个人魅力 Well, that's a personal best.
实际上 这是送给她的 Actually, the drink's for her. Oh.
这里面挺暗的 Oh! It's pretty dark in here.
看来他没好好看我 He probably didn't get a good look at me.
伊迪 别当真 Oh, Edie, don't take it personally.
我们是不同风格 We're just different types.
对 有些人喜欢高个 金发 性感的 You're right. Some like tall, blonde and sexy,
有些人喜欢的 and some men like...
是这种 That.
伊迪 别这么刻薄 Now, now, Edie. Don't be snarky.
我们是最漂亮的 记得吗 We're both hot, remember?
虽然看起来 我可能更漂亮 Although, apparently, I'm just a little bit hotter.
一个人会这么想 Well, one guy might think so.
那个人明显是被丰满的女性的胸部 One guy who's evidently intimidated
给吓坏了 by full-sized womanly breasts.
我在这方面是小了一点 Hmm. Yes, I guess I am a little on the small side.
这是真货的缺点啊 That's the drawback to having ones that are real.
你在说什么啊 我的也是真货 What are you talking about? These are real.
伊迪 你上下跳的时候 Oh, Edie, come on. When you jump up and down,
房子都震动了 你的胸部还纹丝不动呢 the room moves more than your boobs.
有人看来是怒了 Well, someone obviously has a chip on her shoulder.
我能继续 击败你 I'd reach down and knock it off,
但我可没那么低级 but I can't go down that low.
你真的觉得你比我漂亮吗 Okay, you really think you're hotter than me?
我只能说 我有男人想要的 Let's just say that I have more of what men want.
是吗 我可是有杯伏特加饮料 看起来可不是这样 Yeah? Well, I have a vodka soda here that says otherwise.
他送你一杯酒 Ooh! So he bought you one drink...
一杯不错的酒 A well drink, I might add.
就比你多这一点 Well, it's one more than you got.
你是说 我找不到人送我酒吗 Are you saying that I can't get a man to buy me a cocktail?
当然 有啦 只不过没我多 Sure, you can, just not as many as me.
一个小时 One hour.
最后谁收集的调酒棒最多 谁就赢 Whoever gets the most swizzle sticks by the end wins.
一个小时见 你输定了 See ya in an hour, loser.
我知道男人们喜欢什么 我们知道男人们想要什么 ♪ I know what boys like, we know what guys want ♪
我知道男人们喜欢什么 我们知道男人们想要什么 ♪ I know what boys like, we know what guys like ♪
我让他们渴望我 ♪ I make them want me ♪
我喜欢挑逗他们 ♪ I like to tease them ♪
他们想来抚摸我 ♪ they want to touch me ♪
我从来不让他们得逞 ♪ I never let them ♪
我知道男人们喜欢什么 ♪ I know what boys like ♪
我们知道男人们想要什么 ♪ we know what guys want ♪
我知道男人们喜欢什么 ♪ I know what boys like ♪
男人们喜欢 ♪ boys like ♪
男人们喜欢我 ♪ boys like me ♪
烂货 ♪ sucker ♪
我知道男人们喜欢什么 ♪ I know what boys like ♪
我们知道男人们想要什么 ♪ we know what guys want ♪
啦 ♪ na-na na-na na ♪
索利斯 数一下 让你伤心死 Count 'em and weep, Solis.
我以为我行的 Well, I guess I could do that.
谁知更行 Or I could do this.
我本想说点什么 Ah. I should make some kind of speech.
事实很明显 我们都很清楚你输了 对吧? But I think it's enough. We both know I crushed you, right?
抱歉我得离开了 Now if you'll excuse me,
给我买第17杯酒的家伙有一艘快艇 和一双巨足 swizzle stick number 17 has a yacht and giant feet.
你到底是怎么想的 What the hell were you thinking,
把我一人扔在单身酒吧 abandoning me at a singles bar?
对不起 I'm sorry.
我只是想 一个人呆一会儿 I just needed to be by myself for a while.
为什么 Why?
你不是因为输掉了一个无聊的游戏 Don't tell me you're depressed
而在这难过吧 because you lost some stupid game.
我不是难过 I'm not depressed.
我是很惊讶 I'm surprised.
它可以消逝得这么快 It's going by so quickly.
什么 What is?
我的青春 My youth.
我越是使劲去抓住它 The harder I try to hold on to it,
它越... the more it just...
在我指间滑走 Slips through my fingers.
所有的化妆品 和暗淡的灯光 And all the makeup and dim lighting in the world
都不能掩盖脸上的皱纹 can't seem to stop it.
拜托 你很美了 Oh, please. You're gorgeous.
而且你会这么一直美下去的 And you are going to stay that way forever.
鬼才相信 Hmm. That's the tricky part.
我不会老去的 I'm not gonna be old.
你在说什么 What?
当我还是小孩时 Ever since I was a child,
我就知道我不会活过50岁 I've known that I was never gonna see 50.
真可笑 Oh, that's ridiculous.
这是真的 No, it's true.
每当我回首往事 As far back as I can remember,
我脑中都有一个声音 "活在当下 a voice in my head said, "live it up today,
因为你的日子不会太长" 'cause you're not gonna have a lot of tomorrows."
你知道 You do realize
现在医学上可以消除那些声音 对吧 there's medication designed to get rid of those voices?
加布 这不是什么坏事 It's not a bad thing, Gaby.
这其实是一份礼物 It's actually a gift.
我... I...
感激我的生命 Appreciate my life
用和大多数人都不同的方式 in a way that most people don't.
我只是不想它过得这么快 I just didn't expect it to go by this fast.
仅仅如此 That's all.
你知道吗 Well, you know what?
我脑中的那个声音告诉我 你是错的 I have a voice inside my head that says you're wrong.
它告诉我50年后 It tells me that 50 years from now,
我们同样穿着紧身衣 you and I will still be wearing dresses too tight
蹬着高跟鞋 and walking in heels too high
去酒吧 and going to bars
那些老家伙会用他们最后一笔社保金 where we'll meet old geezers who'll buy us drinks
给我们买酒喝 with the last of their social security checks.
但愿如此 If you say so.
走 去我家 Now come on. Let's go to my house.
我们开瓶酒 为我们的明天干杯 Let's pop open a bottle of wine and toast to our future.
走吧 Why not?
很奇怪吧 Isn't that weird?
她料到她英年早逝 She knew she was gonna die young.
你们什么意思 你们两个是 最辣的 What do you mean, you two were the hottest chicks on the Lane?
她称我为 小孩工厂 She called me a baby factory?
加布 Yeah, Gaby, in hindsight,
或许你应该 省去那一段 maybe you shouldn't have told that part of the story. Oh, pfft.
我们到了 I think we're here.
大家准备好了吗 So are we ready for this?
我不知道 I don't know.
怎么会准备好告诉一个小孩 他妈妈死了 Can you ever be ready to tell a boy that his mother is dead?
特拉法斯 Hey, Travers.
还记得我们吗 Remember us?
当然 Sure.
整条街的人都来了 Wow. You brought the whole neighborhood with you.
我妈妈也来了吗 Did my mom come with you?
我们给你带了些松糕 We brought you some muffins.
你可以和你的室友一块吃 You can share them with your roommates
或是你最喜欢的老师 or maybe a favorite teacher.
发生什么事了吗 What's going on?
是我妈妈遇到什么麻烦 还是怎么了 Is my mom in trouble or something?
过来 Come here.
我们带来了不太好的消息 I'm afraid we have some bad news.
你妈妈遇到了严重的事故 Your mom was in a very serious accident,
我很抱歉 and I am so sorry...
她过世了 But she passed away.
她死了 She died?
什么时候 When?
几天前 A couple of days ago.
我们试过联系你的爸爸 We've been trying to get in touch with your dad,
但他不在国内 but he's still out of the country.
你妈妈的新丈夫从没见过你 And your mom's new husband's never met you,
所以他想最好由我们来告诉你 so he thought it would be best if we told you.
喔 Wow.
如果你愿意 我们可以让你静一静 If you'd like, we could give you a moment.
不 No.
我没事 I'm okay.
我还有课 Well, I have a class.
如果你请几天假 Uh, I'm sure the school will understand
校方肯定会理解的 if you need to miss a few days.
没有必要这么做 I don't need to do that.
我是说 我很抱歉她死了 但我们并没有那么亲密 I mean, I'm sorry she's dead, but we weren't very close.
但她是你的母亲 Still, she was your mother.
血缘上是 Technically.
事实她并不是个好母亲 But not a very good one.
特拉法斯 我们都是做妈妈的 Look, Travers, we're all moms here.
我们都犯过错 We've all made mistakes with our kids,
我们指望当你们长大后 and what we count on is when they grow up,
你们会原谅我们 她甚至都不愿意抚养我 they'll forgive us. My mom didn't even try to raise me.
她把我丢给我爸爸就走掉了 I mean, she just handed me to my father and walked away.
我怎么会原谅她 How do you expect me to forgive that?
我很抱歉 Look, I'm sorry.
我不想表现得粗鲁 但我要迟到了 I don't mean to be rude, but I'm gonna be late.
等等 Hey! Hey, hey, hey, hey. Wait a second.
特拉法斯 你必须更了解你的妈妈 Travers, you need to know something about your mom,
让我来告诉你 坐下 and I'm gonna tell you. Now sit down.
我认识她有一年了 I'd only known your mom about a year
有天她来到我家 when she came over to my house this one day.
凯伦 你门廊上的灯还没关 Hey, Karen! Your porch light's on.
穿着浴袍喝酒 Whoa. Sitting in your bathrobe drinking,
居然也不叫上我 and you didn't call me?
我想一个人呆会 I kinda wanted to be alone.
为什么 Why?
今天是我儿子的忌日 It's the anniversary of my son's death. Ohh.
对不起 I'm sorry.
每年我都以为会慢慢好起来 Every year I think it'll get easier,
但从来没有 and it never does.
没有比失去小孩更糟的了 Nothing worse than losing a child.
你算得上是幸运的 你没有小孩 In a way, you're kinda lucky you don't have any.
我有一个 Actually, I do.
什么 What?
我有一个儿子 Mm, I have a son.
你来这一年了 我怎么不知道 You lived here a year. How do I not know this?
他和他父亲生活 Because he lives with his father.
我们离婚后 由他父亲监护 When I got divorced, I gave him full custody,
所以我清楚你的感受 so I kinda know how you feel.
我们都失去过 I mean, we've both lost kids.
不 No.
我失去了小孩 I lost a kid.
而你是抛弃他 You gave yours away.
所以不要再说 你知道我的感受 And you have the nerve to tell me you know how I feel?
我放弃抚养是想保护他 I gave him up because I wanted to protect him.
不受谁的伤害? From who?
我的 From me.
我努力做个好母亲 You know, I tried to be a good mom. I really did.
但我很了解自己 But I know myself.
如果 And if he...
如果想让他正常生活 If he was gonna grow up normal,
他必须得离开我 he needed to get away from me.
你这胆小鬼 What a cop-out.
我想你就是自私 I think you're just being selfish.
相信我 凯伦 You know, trust me, Karen,
我已经把自己看得一文不值 there is nothing that you could say
你没有权利让把我说得更差 to make me think less about myself than I already do.
如果这样对他是一个机会 那就是值得的 But if it gives him a chance, it's worth it.
你不怕他会恨你吗 Aren't you afraid he's gonna hate you?
我爱他 爱到可以让他恨我 I love him enough to let him hate me.
我希望你不是在犯错 Well, I hope you're not making a big mistake.
我也希望 Well... Me, too.
特拉法斯 我不是在帮她说话 So I'm not defending everything she did, Travers,
但你必须得知道 她很爱你 but you have to know, she loved you,
比你想象得要多 more than you can imagine.
我得去上课了 I really need to get to class.
让开让开 我要坐前面 Bup, bup, bup. I believe I called shotgun.
天哪 她很在行抢位 God, she is so good at that.
的确 她从坐公共马车那会 She should be. She's been doing it
就开始抢座位了 不是吗 since she rode shotgun on an actual stagecoach. Hey. Hey.
我想我应该感谢你们 I realized... I never thanked you
大老远地赶来告诉我 for coming all the way out here just to tell me.
你们都是好人 That was really cool of you.
我们觉得应该为你妈妈这么做 We felt we owed it to your mom.
哦 天哪 我们竟然忘了 Oh, my god. I can't believe we forgot.
什么 What?
我们 We, uh...
把你妈妈的骨灰也带来了 Also came to give you your mom's ashes.
我们想你可能想把它撒在什么地方 We thought you might wanna scatter them somewhere.
或者你觉得有点怪 Unless that's a little... Weird for you.
我觉得你们更适合决定 Why don't you guys take 'em?
你确定吗 Are you sure?
是的 Yeah.
你们是她最好的朋友 You were her best friends.
你们一定知道撒在哪里最合适 I'm sure you could think of the perfect place to put her.
我们到了 Okay, we're here.
大家醒醒 Guys... Wake up.
伙计们 Guys?
我们到家了 We're home. Get out.
天哪 你差点害我犯心脏病了 Lord, Lynette. You nearly gave me a heart attack.
我希望再次看见伊迪 不过不是今晚 Yeah, I'd like to see Edie again, but not tonight.
我的腿麻掉了 Oh, I think my leg's asleep.
那是我的腿 把你的手拿开 Actually, that's my leg. Get your hand off.
勒奈特 谢谢你开车送我们回来 Lynette, thank you again for driving.
不谢 等等 You bet. Hold it.
我们还没有决定 把骨灰撒在哪里 We still gotta figure out where we're gonna spread the ashes.
一定得是对伊迪意义重大的地方 Now it's gotta be some place that was meaningful to Edie.
伊迪曾经告诉我 她在一个奶牛牧场失贞 Well, Edie once told me she lost her virginity in a cow pasture.
如果我们能找到那个地方 If we can find that exact field...
我们能发现许多有心理创伤的奶牛 We'd find a lot of traumatized cows.
我们一定得在今晚商量吗 Do we really need to do this tonight? They're ashes.
骨灰是不会变质的 It's not like they're gonna go bad.
好的 明天再说 Fine. We'll talk tomorrow.
伊迪 我们该怎么做 Oh, Edie, what are we gonna do with you?
还是这么难以捉摸 Subtle as always, I see.
凯伦 这主意很棒 This was a wonderful idea, Karen.
不完全是我的主意 当心 伊迪溢出来了 It wasn't exactly mine. Now be careful. You're spilling Edie.
已经倒完了 Urn is empty.
开始吧 Let's do it.
我们应该先说点什么吧 Shouldn't we say something first?
说点什么 Like what?
不知道 I don't know.
说说她给我们的感觉 A few words describing how we felt about her?
我想伊迪一定不喜欢我们这么脆弱 I don't think Edie would want us to get all sappy.
我想她更希望我们能快点结束这一切 Well, I think if we're quick about it, she'd be fine. Mm.
我有个主意 Here's a thought...
我们用一个词来总结对她的感受 We all say one word that sums up what we thought of her.
然后扔掉她 对 扔掉她 And then we dump her? Then we dump her.
只用一个词 这很难 Just one word. This is hard.
我有了 我先来吧 Mm. Okay, I got one. I'll go first.
伊迪·布利特很性感 Edie Britt was sexy.
敏锐 Perceptive.
坚强 Strong.
美丽 Beautiful. Mm-hmm.
我要用四个字 I need four words.
我想公正评价伊迪 为此 Ay.
我要用四个词 伊迪会 Okay. I want to do Edie justice, and for that to happen,
不会很惊讶的 请便 I need four words, okay? Edie would so not be surprised you're ruining this moment.
说吧 苏珊 哪4个词形容伊迪 Go ahead, Susan. What are your four words for Edie?
她是异类 One of a kind.
到时间了 Now it's time.
这就是 And that is
紫藤郡如何成为我永久的安息之地的 how Wisteria Lane came to be my final resting place.
我的骨灰被洒在曾经走过的草地上 My ashes were spread over grass I had once walked on...
曾经乘凉的大树下 Beneath trees that had once given me shade...
曾经欣赏的玫瑰花上 On top of roses I once admired...
曾经跟别人叽叽喳喳交谈过的篱笆旁 And beside fences I once gossiped over.
在我的朋友们完成告别仪式之后 And after my friends had finished saying good-bye,
一阵风吹来 把剩下的带到了空气中 a wind came along and took what was left of me into the air.
我看着下面的世界 As I looked down on the world,
我开始释放 I began to let go of it.
我远离那个白色的箭桩篱笆 I let go of white picket fences
车道上的停车 and cars in driveways,
咖啡杯和吸尘器 coffee cups and vacuum cleaners.
我远离看起来是如此平常的所有事物 I let go of all those things which seem so ordinary,
但把它们组合到一起时 就成了一种生活 but when you put them together, they make up a life...
一种确实异类的生活 A life that really was one of a kind.
给你说吧 I'll tell you something...
只要好好生活过 死并不难 It's not hard to die when you know you have lived,
我就是这样 and I did.
我的人生啊 Oh, how I lived.