(前情提要)
-你要去约会吗 -约会 Are you going out on a date? - Date?
不是 托伯特有嫌犯的线索 No! Tobert has a suspect he has a lead on.
我要跟他一起跟监 那里有服装要求 I'm meeting him for a stakeout, and the place has a dress code.
强纳森 哈尔德的男朋友就是你的嫌犯 Jonathan? Howard's sweet boyfriend was your guy?
还有谁更能因为他的死受益 Who else had more to gain from him dying, you know?
他在跟谁打招呼 Who's he hugging hello?
他穿红色外套 戴着帽子 He's wearing a red coat and a cap.
他是班的私人医生 That was Ben's private doctor.
专门接待名人 需要什么都帮你开处方的那种 One of those, uh, celebrity-concierge, anything-you-need prescription-filler types.
你来了 You're here!
欢迎来到我住的纽约 Welcome to my slice of New York.
你知道谁真的是他妈的猪吗 Hey, you know who was a real fucking pig?
班葛兰罗伊 Ben Glenroy.
你没打算向我求婚 You didn't mean to propose to me?
没有 No, I didn't.
梅宝 当我的伙伴 Mabel, be my partner.
-我已经有伙伴了 -那些老头 I already have partners. The old guys?
不对 他们正忙着筹备另一部百老汇烂戏 No, they're busy putting together another bomb of a Broadway show,
哪有你的位置 which leaves you where?
我该去放水洗澡吗 Shall I draw us a bath?
奥利佛 Oliver?
等你哦 I'm waiting...
剧院是出了名的鬼影幢幢 Theaters are known for their ghosts.
像古斯伯利 Take the Goosebury.
1919年 吉迪恩古斯伯利 是白色大道上的明日之星 In 1919, Gideon Goosebury was a rising star on the Great White Way.
但他在首演夜 But on opening night,
演出《尘归尘》中 思念情人的烟囱清洁工时 playing the lovesick chimney sweep in Ashes to Ashes,
有个300磅重的沙袋从椽条上松脱 a 300-pound sandbag came loose from the rafters
他第二幕的独白说到一半 就被砸中脑袋 and brained him in the middle of his second-act monologue.
传说中 Legend has it,
如果每天晚上 不把吉迪恩在舞台上的能量扫掉 if you don't sweep Gideon's energy off the stage every night,
他就会想办法诅咒你的戏 he'll find a way to curse your show.
1949年 霍乱在《哈姆雷特》剧团中肆虐 There was the cholera outbreak that tore through the company of Hamlet in 1949,
1988年 约翰吉尔古德 在新版《冰人来了》期间带状疱疹发作 John Gielgud's crippling shingles attack during The Iceman Cometh revival in '88,
现在则是班葛兰罗伊之死 and now the death of Ben Glenroy.
当舞台成为你人生的一部分... When you make the stage a part of your life,
(罗芮塔德金) (首次试演)
要逃离你内心的魔鬼可能也很难 it can be hard to escape your personal ghosts, too.
(他妈的猪)
你的执迷 你的失败 Your obsessions. Your failures.
当你以为自己终于跳脱窠臼 Just when you think you've broken free from your old patterns,
突然间 它们都回来纠缠你 boom. They come back to haunt you.
我知道 麦金利总统 I know, President McKinley,
裘伊带走了一切 Joy took everything.
除了你跟我 Except you and me.
态度有问题的家伙 The guys with the attitude problems.
但我们会没事的 But, we'll be fine.
我们还有彼此 We have each other.
但当你的未来开始纠缠你 该怎么办 But what do you do when your future starts haunting you?
你无从做出的选择 The choices you'll never make.
无从体验的人生 The lives you'll never lead?
有什么比梦想已然幻灭的人更危险 What's more dangerous than someone whose dreams have died?
哈尔德 怎么了 Howard! What's wrong?
我必须坦白一件事 I have something I need to confess.
我杀了班葛兰罗伊 I killed Ben Glenroy.
破案三人行 第三季第六集
本WEB版外挂字幕由 风吹来的那片云 双语合并
(第三季 第六集) (鬼灯)
传说中 往北边扫三下 再往南边扫三下 就安全了 Legend has it, three sweeps to the north, three sweeps to the south, you're safe.
《临死之鸣》排练期间 我每晚都扫地 I did that every night during Death Rattle.
但在首演夜 我没扫地 But on opening night, I didn't sweep
班就死了 and Ben died!
等一下 Hold on.
你说你杀了班葛兰罗伊 I thought you said you killed Ben Glenroy.
-对 -现在你又说 Yes. Now, you're saying
是鬼杀了班葛兰罗伊 a ghost killed Ben Glenroy.
对 查尔斯 很好懂啊 Yes, Charles! It's perfectly simple!
我想靠每晚扫地的仪式保护这出戏 I was protecting our show from a malevolent spirit
不受恶灵的侵扰 with a nightly sweeping ritual.
但在首演夜 我去KT的办公室拿扫把 But on opening night, I went to get the broom from KT's office,
结果门是上锁的 and it was locked.
里面还传出奇怪的声响 Strange noises coming from within.
我应该找到她的 I should've found her.
我应该拿到钥匙 I should've gotten the key.
但我不想跟KT互动 因为她嘴巴坏 But I try to never interact with KT because of her casual cruelty.
口气又难闻 And her breath.
所以我没扫地 五个小时后 So I didn't sweep, and five hours later,
班就死了 Ben was dead!
哈尔德 你怎么都没提过这件事 Howard, why haven't you told anyone about this before?
我说服自己 我只是想太多 I guess I convinced myself it was all in my head.
但今天早上 But then, this morning,
我看到他了 I saw him.
-谁 -谁 Who?
吉迪恩 Gideon.
我当时在剧院 I was at the theater.
我在扫地 I was sweeping,
因为我们明天要回剧院 because we're moving back into the theater tomorrow
我想确保那里没有鬼魂 and I wanna make sure it's completely ghost-free.
我听到一个声响... And I heard a noise.
有人吗 Hello?
有人在吗 Is someone there?
我会以色列格斗术哦 I know Krav Maga!
他就在那里 头戴招牌帽子 身穿红色外套 And there he was, in his signature cap and red coat.
我说... I said...
吉迪恩古斯伯利 是你吗 Gideon Goosebury! Is that you?
然后他说... And he said...
当然是 Sure...
哈尔德 恕我直言 但世界上没有鬼 Howard, I hate to break it to you, but ghosts aren't real.
当然有 Oh, of course, they are.
围着毛巾的男人 Ho! Man in towel!
查尔斯 我知道 Yes, Charles, I'm aware.
爆雷警告 Spoiler alert.
不对 这句话不是这样用的 Nope, not the correct usage of that whatsoever.
-大逆转 -还是不对 - Plot twist? - Still no.
我有一次拍抓鬼纪录片 You know, I shot a ghost hunter doc once,
我们整晚待在闹鬼的玛莉皇后号上 and we spent an entire night aboard the haunted Queen Mary.
凌晨3点左右 我一个人在饭厅 Around 3:00 AM, alone in the dining room,
亲眼看到她 白衣女子 I saw her with my own two eyes, the Lady in White.
你知道玛莉皇后 是英国首任执政的女王吗 Did you know that Queen Mary was England's first queen regnant?
很多人以为是12世纪的玛蒂尔达 A lot of people think it was Matilda from the 12th century,
但她从来没加冕过 but she was never actually crowned.
查尔斯 如果你想说比较有趣的轶事 Charles, if the goal was to offer a more interesting anecdote,
你的方向错了 we're headed in the wrong direction.
哈啰 有人在听我讲话吗 Hello! Is anyone hearing what I'm saying?!
我们的剧院现在有会杀人的鬼 There is a murderous ghost loose in our theater right now,
而且下一个目标就是我们 and he's coming for one of us next!
天啊 我就说吧 God! I'm telling you--
哈尔德 呼吸 Howard, breathe!
给我们一点时间 Hey, just, uh, give us a moment. Hm?
你的牙齿怎么了 Hey, what's up with your tooth?
这是临时的 Oh, it's a temporary. If I like it,
如果我喜欢 牙医会再调色 the dentist says he'll do the rest to match.
-你觉得呢 -很亮 像车灯一样 - What do you think? - Bright. Like a headlight.
好 哈尔德显然没真的见鬼 Okay. Obviously, Howard didn't see an actual ghost
但我还是觉得我们该去一趟 but I still think it's worthwhile us going over there.
我完全赞成 Oh, I totally agree.
抱歉 我们在谈事情... S-- Sorry, we're having a conversation here.
你有听到他说帽子跟红外套吗 Mabel, did you hear what he said about the cap and the red coat?
-听起来就像... -班的医生 我也这么想 - I mean, it kinda sounds like-- - Ben's doctor? I had the same thought. Jesus.
所以他昨晚看到我们 知道他曝光了 Yeah, so he saw us last night, and then realized he'd been made--
今天早上就回剧院掩盖踪迹 So he goes straight to the theater this morning to cover his tracks.
没错 如果是他跟强纳森下的毒 Exactly. I mean, if he and Jonathan are behind the poisoning,
他们会想确保没留下证据 then they'd definitely wanna make sure there's no evidence.
-有道理 -是啊 That's good.
抱歉 嗨 我们还在这里 Oh, sorry. Hi! We're still here.
走进饭厅的三个初始成员 Yeah, the original three who came into the dining room.
-对 记得吗 -好 Yeah, remember that? Yeah.
你怀疑起强纳森了 Uh, you suspect Jonathan now?
你还跟这家伙调查 And you're investigating with this guy?
强纳森是班的替补演员 那是很大的动机 Jonathan was Ben's understudy. That's a pretty big motive.
我也说过我昨晚要跟托伯特一起跟监 And I told you I was going on a stakeout with Tobert last night.
对哦 我忘了 Oh yeah. Right. I forgot.
我大概太关注裘伊了 她离开我了 I was probably preoccupied with Joy, who left me, by the way.
爆雷警告 Spoiler alert.
等等 裘伊离开你 什么时候 Wait, Joy left you? When?
-昨天 -你还好吗 查尔斯 Yesterday. - Are you okay, Charles?
我很好 我很好 Oh, I'm fine. I'm fine.
这不是我第一次落马 This is not my first rodeo.
这个老牛仔被女人甩过 This old clown's been bucked by Lady Love before
又回到马背上了 咿哈 and got back up to ride again. Yee-haw!
真有说服力 Very convincing.
重点是我好得不得了 Well, the point is I'm completely fine,
而且裘伊没写「他妈的猪」 and Joy did not write "Fucking Pig."
有人写了 Well, someone did.
撞鬼的事会是 哈尔德掩护强纳森的说词吗 Is it possible this ghost thing is Howard trying to cover for Jonathan?
他真的很心烦意乱 He sounded genuinely distraught.
我们都知道哈尔德超不会演戏 And we all know that Howard can't act his way out of a damp paper bag.
我有个想法 不如我自己跟哈尔德去剧院 Here's a thought. Why don't I go with Howard to the theater alone?
我会安抚他 陪他探究一下撞鬼的事 I'll throw him a bone. We can look into his ghost thing, you know?
-怎么了 -没事 我只是很意外 What? Nothing, it's just surprising.
你最近都没主导调查 You haven't exactly been driving this investigation.
事实上 你还反对调查 In fact, you've been anti-investigation.
那就让我补偿你 演一场单人马吧 Well, why don't I make it up to you with a little solo mish?
马是马戏的简称 Mish is short for, for mishegoss.
-不行 我也要去 -你去的话 我也要去 No way. I'm coming, too. If you're going, so am I.
我去跟托伯特说 Alright, I'm gonna tell Tobert.
梅宝 听我说 Wait! Mabel, a word?
我们算是三人组 You know, we're kind of a trio.
而且不缺人 And we're not hiring.
好啦 Alright, fine.
这会很好玩的 我们三个一起 我好想念这样 This'll be fun, the three of us together. I've missed this.
嘿 杰克 珍娜 克莉丝 可以快一点吗 Hey! Jack, Janet, and Chrissy, can we speed this up, please?!
这是《三人行》的哏 It's a Three's Company reference!
那些是主角们原本的名字 Those were the original character names on the show
克莉丝后来被改成辛蒂了 before they changed Chrissy to Cindy!
我干嘛用吼的 Why the fuck am I yelling?!
我知道 因为外头有个会杀人的鬼 Oh, oh, oh, oh, I know! Because there is a murderous ghost on the loose!
我的天啊
这里好暗 It's dark in here.
不过还有鬼灯 Except for the ghost light.
哈尔德看到的人可能还在 小声点 Whoever Howard saw might still be here. Keep it down.
抱歉 我是说鬼灯是剧院的老传统 I'm sorry. I was saying the ghost light is an old theater tradition.
它必须一直亮着 而且绝不会熄灭 It has to stay on at all times, and it never ever goes out.
铁齿叔在说啥 Nonbeliever says what?
那样是有点奇怪 That was kinda strange.
对 八成是KT弄的 她一定在这里排提示 No, no, KT probably did it. She must be here running cues.
你们去看看 她是不是在楼座后面的控制室吧 Why don't you all go see if she's in the booth behind the balcony,
我去更衣室附近瞧瞧 and I'll look around the dressing rooms?
-好吗 好 -不行 我们不能走散 Good? Good. No! We have to stick together.
对 恐怖片的第一守则就是不能走散 That's right. First rule of every horror movie. Never get separated.
麦金利总统一定很受不了这些骚动 All this commotion can't be good for President McKinley.
那条鱼叫麦金利总统 The fish is named President McKinley?
它干嘛跟我们来 Why is he here with us again?
想象你们整天在水族箱里 Imagine you're in a fish tank all day long, and you look out,
你们往外看 会看到两个人走过 and you see two people walking by.
然后有一天 你们只看到一个人 And then one day, you only see one.
它可能心灵受创 He could be traumatized.
吉迪恩就是那样死的 That's exactly how Gideon died.
是吗 吉迪恩要来抓我了吗 It is? Could Gideon be out for me now?
查尔斯 你不是这件事的主角 Charles, do not make this all about you!
好吧 也许你是 Okay, maybe it is about you.
(古斯伯利剧院) Oh God, oh God, oh God.
扫把 我需要扫把 Broom! I need that broom!
可恶 哈尔德 你毁了我的精彩画面 Damn it, Howard, you made me fuck up my highlighting.
KT 我们可能有问题了 KT, we may have an issue.
那就是我差点被两个掉下来的沙袋砸死 The issue is I was just nearly killed by two falling sandbags.
各位 保持冷静 Ladies and gentlemen, stay calm.
我要所有人远离舞台 I'm gonna need everyone to keep the stage clear
让我做绳索安检 while I safety check the flies.
谁有双小手 能帮我测试绳索 Now, who has small hands who can help me test the ropes?
哈尔德 他的手跟娃娃一样小 Take Howard. He has hands like an American Girl doll.
-才没有呢 -哈尔德 你跟KT去 - I do not. - Howard, go with KT.
照她的话做 Do literally whatever she says.
嘿 这是点名表吗 Hey. Is this an attendance sheet?
是签到表 上台前半小时要签的 Yeah, it's a sign-in sheet. You sign in when you come in at half hour.
上面有整个剧团的字迹 Handwriting samples from the whole cast.
我们能用它来比对 班镜子上的「他妈的猪」 We can use this to compare to the "Fucking Pig" on Ben's mirror.
我看那可能没什么帮助 Oh, I don't know. I don't think that would be very helpful.
这明明就是你会做的事 It's exactly the kind of thing that you would do.
我是从奥利佛帕南的剧本抄的 I basically pulled it from the Oliver Putnam playbook.
既然那是我的剧本 东西给我 Well, that playbook is mine to play with, so gimme that.
它在漏水吗 水位好像很低 Is he leaking? His water seems low.
我还是不懂你干嘛带它来 I still don't understand why you brought him.
这个嘛 说起来有点难为情 Well, this is a little embarrassing to say, but...
但我现在只剩下这条鱼了 this fish is all I have right now.
不是每个人都有性感的新男友 It's not like all of us have hot, new boyfriends.
托伯特不是我男友 Tobert is not my boyfriend.
字尾的「特」要发音 Oh, so you do pronounce the final T.
不像法国起司「托伯」 It's not like a French cheese. Tobere...
先生 不好意思 我想要点托伯 Uh, gar?on? S'il vous plait, I would like a le Tobere.
好 我要在起司这里打断你 Okay! I'm just gonna cut you off at the cheese.
你有跟他一起录我们的线上电台吗 Well... did you record with him for our podcast?
-没有 -你让他看了凶案关系图 - No! - Well, you showed him our Murder Board.
那红线呢 And how about our red string?
你有让他英俊的手指动那些红线吗 Did you let his handsome fingers move our red string around?
查尔斯 Charles.
我们怎么能放心让你处理案件机密 Well, how can we trust you with confidential case information
你随时可能跟陌生人分享内容 when we know you might share it with a stranger at any moment?
你们要怎么放心... How can you trust me? Wha-- I--
他又不是陌生人 A-And he's not a stranger.
我们要慎选交往的对象 We just have to be careful who we get involved with.
对 我想我的纪录比你的优良 Yeah, and I think I have a better track record with that than you.
托伯特这两天对案子的贡献 Tobert has done more for this case in the past two days
比你过去两周还要多 than you have the past two weeks.
好吧 但我一直在忙 Okay, yeah. But, I've been busy.
对 但是... Yeah, but I--
奥利佛去哪了 Where the hell is Oliver?
麦金利总统一定在漏水 You know, President McKinley is definitely leaking.
我得找个东西装它 I need to find something to put him in.
走廊上应该有道具间 I think there's a props closet down the hall.
对 你去忙你的 Yeah, you go ahead and do that,
奥利佛也可以去忙他的 Oliver can do whatever the hell he's doing,
我会跟平常一样继续独自调查的 and I'll keep investigating, alone, as usual!
我真的看不出来 I really don't see it.
F到底有几种写法啊 How many ways are there to write an F anyway?
可恶 Son of a bitch.
大伙 Guys?
你们应该来这里看一样东西 Th-There's something here I think you should see.
有人吗 Hello?
有人在吗 Is someone there?
我也会以色列格斗术哦 I also know Krav Maga!
有人吗 Hello?
我要上去了 所以... I'm coming up, so...
我到了 I'm here.
所以... So...
天啊 这里活像《歌剧魅影》的大学宿舍 My God, this looks like the Phantom of the Opera's college dorm room.
你说得对 我不该带你来的 You're right. I never should have brought you here.
有人吗 帮你装点水 没问题 Hello. Get you a little water. No problem.
你是家鱼 你属于鱼缸 You're an indoor fish, you belong in a tank.
都一样是水啦 Water is water, right?
嘿 谁最爱你 Hey, who loves ya?
尽情伸展吧 Go ahead, stretch out.
我忙完了再来找你 I'll be back to get you when we're done.
到时候...有人吗 Hello?
真的吗 Really?
有人吗 Hello?
有人吗 Hello!
莫惊慌 No need to panic.
我的朋友们会注意到我不见 跑回来找我的 My friends will notice I'm gone, and they'll come back to get me.
我说了别惊慌 I said don't panic!
老天爷啊 你咬我 Jesus Christ, you bit me.
对 那只是门牙尖端 你他妈的... Yeah, well, that's just the tip of the incisor, you fucking--
杰瑞 Jerry?
杰瑞布劳 Jerry Blau?
奥利佛 谢天谢地 另一位导演 Oliver. Oh, thank God, a fellow director.
你不该那样鬼鬼祟祟接近别人 You shouldn't sneak up on people like that, Jerry!
我不年轻了 可能会心脏病发 I'm not a young man! You could've given me a heart attack!
抱歉 奥利 我以为你要来赶我走 I'm sorry, Ollie. I thought you were someone coming to kick me out.
你在这里干嘛 What are you doing here?
唐娜一年前就把你开除了 Donna fired you off this show a year ago.
你住在这里 Are you living in here?
不是 对啦 我占用了这里 No. I mean, yes. I'm squatting.
但这在剧院算是传统 对吧 But there's a rich tradition of that in the theater, right?
对 Right.
我确实在玛琳史坦普顿的玄关 住了复杂的三个月 I did spend a complicated three months living in Maureen Stapleton's mud room.
但这不一样 你不应该在这里的 But this is a different situation! You shouldn't be here, Jerry.
等等 我能解释 Just you wait. I can explain.
坐下吧 Have a seat.
你想吃点心吗 Can I interest you in a snack?
不用了 谢谢 Uh, no, I'm good. Thanks.
有人作伴真是开心 It's so nice having company.
查尔斯 奥利佛 Charles? Oliver?
-托伯特 -哇 - Tobert? - Wow. Look,
我知道你想跟你的朋友一起 I know that you wanted to be with your guys, okay?
但我决定跟踪强纳森 而他直接回到剧院 But I decided to tail Jonathan, and he led me right here to the theater.
是他 好 我们走 That's him. Alright, come on. Let's go.
放开我吧 Maybe unhand me?
-好 -谢了 - Oh! Yeah, sorry. - Thanks.
我很高兴你来了 Hey, I'm glad you came.
你不喜欢我吧 You don't like me, do you?
你对这出戏无关紧要 You're irrelevant to the show.
所以对我也无关紧要 Therefore, you're irrelevant to me.
无关紧要 Irrelevant?
我从第一天就在防范这出戏遭到恶灵侵害 I have been protecting this show from negative spirits since day one.
你要是没在首演夜锁住办公室 And if you hadn't locked your office on opening night,
我就不会错过一天 班葛兰罗伊可能就还活着 I wouldn't have missed a day, and Ben Glenroy might still be alive.
首先 我的办公室从来不锁门 First of all, my office door is never locked.
它在首演夜有锁门 It was locked on opening night.
不是我锁的 Not by me it wasn't.
而且什么恶灵 And what negative spirits?
不是吉迪恩吧 Not Gideon.
你知道吉迪恩的事 You know about Gideon?
妈的 哈尔德 我在这里做过43出戏 Fuck it, Howard, I've done 43 shows in this building!
我当然知道吉迪恩的事 Of course I know about Gideon!
但你知道他有多危险吗 But do you know how dangerous he can be?
我知道 I do.
所以我才会扫地 That's why I was sweeping.
他妈的业余人士 Fuckin' amateur hour. Sweeping does nothing.
-扫地根本没用 -没用吗 - It doesn't? - Mm-mm.
这是我最接近梦想的一次 而我搞砸了 This is the closest I've ever come to my dream job, and I fucked it up.
你的梦想是当助理 Your dream job was to be an assistant?
不 是演员 我以前很想演戏 No, an actor. I always wanted to act.
但我中学时得到 《激情年代》普罗克特的角色 But then, in junior high, I got cast as John Proctor in The Crucible.
一开始我大受鼓舞 聚光灯照在脸上的温热感 It was thrilling at first. Feeling the spotlight warm my face
第一次说出我重要的独白 the first time I delivered my big monologue.
但事后家母说 我在舞台上的声音像老女人又尖锐 But after the show, my mother told me my stage voice was matronly and shrill.
她再也不想在公共场合 听到我发出那种声音 She said she never wanted to hear me use that voice again in public.
我就放弃了 So I quit before
根本没开始过 I even began.
真是的 Damn.
我一直很想当导演 I always wanted to be a director.
但已经太迟了 But that ship has sailed.
别那么说 Don't say that.
你不是吉迪恩 You're not Gideon.
你没死 还没啦 You're not dead... yet.
你没办法把吉迪恩扫走 You don't sweep Gideon away.
你必须接纳他 来吧 You have to include him. Come on.
我被抛下多久了 How long have I been abandoned?
一小时 五小时 有人想念的感觉真好 One hour? Five hours? Nice to know I'm missed, huh?
你知道吗 You know what?
你可能说对了 Maybe you're right.
如果你惹恼身边所有的人 If you piss off everyone in your tank,
当你孤单寂寞 怎么能怪他们 how can you blame them when you end up alone?
我干嘛取笑那家伙的名字 托伯特 Wh-Why did I have to make fun of that guy's name? "Tobert."
明明就是个好名字 It's a perfectly good name!
但你跟我会携手度过难关的 But we're gonna get through this, you and me.
你不介意我解放一下吧 You don't mind if I relieve myself, do ya?
我喝了两杯咖啡 又不知道会被关多久 I had two cups of coffee, and who knows how long we're gonna be in here.
唐娜开除我以后 我跟马歇尔为我有没有能力还房贷的事 After Donna fired me, Marshall and I had a dispute about my ability
大吵一架 然后我就被赶出家门了 to continue paying our mortgage, and I was asked to vacate the premises.
幸好这个地方免费 只要我别被逮到 Luckily, this place is free, as long as I don't get caught.
你就是那个鬼魂 So, you're the ghost?
今天早上 你的男仆看到我 Uh, your manservant spotted me this morning.
我听到他大叫吉迪恩古斯伯利 I heard him ranting about Gideon Goosebury,
心想如果我能假装是他 and I thought if I could pretend to be him,
吓吓几个人 丢几个沙袋 或许就可以把你们吓跑 offer a few frights, drop a few sandbags, it might scare you all off.
我知道几率很低 Long shot, I know, but...
但你该不会杀了班葛兰罗伊吧 is there also any chance that you killed Ben Glenroy?
真的假的 我生气了 Really, Oliver? I'm offended.
我的事业或许有些小挫折 I may have suffered a minor career setback,
但我可不是禽兽 but I'm not a monster!
老天 那是老鼠吗 Ah! Oh, my G-- Is that a rat?!
你今晚来得正好 You came on a good night.
我的夜晚可能再也好不起来了 I doubt I'll have a good night ever again.
你还好吗 奥利 You okay, Ollie?
你知道剧院的第一守则吗 You know the first rule of theater?
午夜过后别喂食休杰克曼 Don't feed Hugh Jackman after midnight.
另一条 The other one.
你爱上其中一个演员了 You fell in love with one of your actors.
对 Yes.
是辫子女士吗 Lady with the braids?
这下你担心了 因为她脾气很火爆 Now you're worried because of her violent temper.
什么 脾气很火爆 What? Wh-What violent temper?
就是首演夜在后台发生的事 Well, you know what happened backstage on opening night?
你不知道 You don't know.
还好你不是这里唯一的导演 Well luckily, you're not the only director here.
你看 木偶 Voilà. Puppets.
我的天啊 Oh, good lord.
看吧 我可没闲着 See? I keep busy.
我就对那家伙说:「你要是这么厉害 So then, I say to the guy, "Look, if you're so tough,
那你骑机车进黑猩猩园区啊」 then you ride the moped into the chimp enclosure."
然后他说...他说... And he goes-- he go--
总统先生 Mr. President!
谢谢你 Thank you.
-快还来 -这是什么 - Uh-- Give those back. - What's this?
「席兰卡姆瑞利医师」 "Dr. Hiram Camareri."
-是C医师吧 -我不知道你在说什么 Dr. C, I presume? I don't know what you're talking about.
拜托 你明知道 我们昨晚看到你和班的医生 Come on, Jonathan, you know we just saw you with Ben's doctor last night.
(更衣室) (强纳森毕吉考)
好吧 好 Alright. Fine.
我接下班的角色以后 一直很焦虑 I've been really anxious since taking over Ben's part.
当主角的压力真的很大 It's a lot of pressure being the lead.
我就找C医师帮忙 So I asked Dr. C for some help.
班想要的 他都弄得到 He could get Ben anything he wanted.
所以他给我「男主角配方」 So he gave me the "Leading Man cocktail."
乙型阻断剂 生发药 生长激素 和一点甲基安非他命 It's a mix of beta blockers, Propecia, HGH, and just a dash of methamphetamine.
都是班以前吃的东西 All the same things Ben was taking.
所以你不想当主角 So you didn't wanna be the lead?
不想 No.
拜托你们别告诉哈尔德 And please don't tell Howard.
他不会理解的 He wouldn't understand.
这是他的梦想 It's his dream,
但他完全不知道 but he has no idea what it's like
一肩扛起整出戏的重担是什么感觉 to carry the weight of an entire show on your shoulders.
大家都知道不能带鱼到剧院 你这个白痴 Everybody knows you don't take a fish in the theater, you idiot!
天啊 Oh, jeez!
麦金利总统 President McKinley!
我让你逃过第二次暗杀了 I saved you from your second assassination attempt.
宇宙在告诉我们 无论遇到什么样的困境... This is the universe telling us that no matter what kind of hardships,
那是对讲机吗 we-- Wait. Is that an intercom?
喂 我是查尔...我在...你听得到吗 Hello? This is Charles. This is-- I'm in the p-- Can you hear me?
我在道具间... I'm in the prop room!
(烟雾机)
嘿 Hey!
嘿 我们有烟雾问题了 H-Hey. I think, uh, we got a smoke issue!
事发当晚 开演半小时前 Now, at half hour on the night in question,
我看到辫子女士在灯塔的楼梯上 I saw Braids Lady jawboning with Mr. Movie Star Man
排练重要的打斗场面时 while they were rehearsing their big fight scene
强力劝说电影明星先生 on the steps of the lighthouse.
她被某件事激怒了 Something set her off.
大概是电影男把掐喉动作做得太过火 Probably Movie Man taking the stage-choking a scooch too far.
他动作很粗暴 He gets rough,
她就质问他 so she gets in his face
还说他是「爱吹喇叭的蠢蛋」 and calls him, and I quote, "A cock-sucking ding dong."
听起来不像她 That doesn't sound like her.
我在椽条上 只听得到三成的话 I'm up in the rafters. I'm only getting every third word.
有可能是「他妈的猪」 It could have been "fucking pig."
总之 这时老白男凑上来 Anyway, now, the Albino Fella comes along.
你是说查尔斯 You mean Charles?
那个过气的白发男 对 The has-been with the hair, yeah.
他直直走进他们之间 He comes right in the middle of all of this
然后朝电影明星先生的嘴巴揍了一拳 and clocks Mr. Movie Star right in the kisser.
查尔斯揍了班 Charles punched Ben?
你完全不知道 You didn't know any of this?
你确定这样有用吗 Are you sure this'll work?
之前42次都有用 It's worked 42 times before.
这是吉迪恩死时所说的独白 And this is the actual monologue Gideon was giving the moment he died?
对 Yep.
把他叫到台上吧 Now, call him to the stage.
吉迪恩 你在吗 Gideon, are you there?
加油 用你的舞台声音 Oh, come on! Use your stage voice!
大声歌唱吧 Sing out, Louise!
-吉迪恩 -你的舞台声音 - Oh, Gideon. - Your stage voice!
吉迪恩 我们不是来驱逐你 而是来赞扬你的 Oh, Gideon! We come not to banish but to praise you!
加入我们 Join us so we may finish
让我们有机会完成你未尽的志业 your great unfinished work!
-别忘了指导我 -好 Don't forget to direct me. Okay.
「艾琳 我这种穷困的烟囱清洁工 怎敢奢望 "Oh, Irene, how could a poor sweep like me ever hope to win the love of
你这般大家闺秀的爱 」 a fine lady like yourself?"
-开头很有力 -谢了 - It's a strong start. - Thanks.
如果你看到这段影片 就代表我死了 If you are seeing this video, it means that I am dead.
我独自死去 只有一条鱼为我见证 I perished alone with only a fish as my witness.
我知道你在想 Now, I know what you're thinking.
「查尔斯 你怎么不尖叫 」 You're thinking, "Charles, why didn't you scream?"
我叫过了 Well, I did!
「你怎么不用手机求救 」 "Why didn't you call somebody on your phone?"
因为这里没有讯号 Because I'm in a closet with no bars!
「你怎么不用你开锁的钥匙 」 "Why didn't you use your jimmy keys?"
开锁的钥匙 Jimmy keys?
你好啊 宝贝 Hello, baby.
我们能确定什么 What do we really know?
罗芮塔讨厌班 Loretta hated Ben.
她对班很凶 She was violent towards Ben.
她有杀害班的动机和机会 She had a motive and opportunity to kill Ben.
但那让她成了杀人凶手或只是... But, does that make her a murderer or just...
怪人 quirky?
天啊 我完蛋了 God, I'm screwed, aren't I?
奥利佛 你跟我认识多久了 Oliver, how far do you and I go back?
从发线还没退就认识了 All the way back to our original hairlines.
打从外外外百老汇刚出现就认识了 All the way back to the dawn of Off-Off-Off-Broadway.
当时你对我说过当导演的关键 And back then, you told me the key to directing.
对 我记得 Yes, I remember.
提醒我一下 Remind me.
你说:「只有不选择才是错误的选择 You said, "The only wrong choice is no choice.
优柔寡断是死路一条」 Indecision is death."
我说过那番话 I said that?
天啊 好惨淡 Jesus, it's so bleak.
你不年轻了 奥利佛 你自己说的 You are not a young man, Oliver. You said so yourself.
该拉屎或离开茅坑了 It's time to shit or get off the bucket.
选择你重视的事物 Choose what matters to you,
然后不惜一切得到它吧 and then do whatever you have to do to get it.
免得跟我一样 不在幕后也不在台前 Or you'll end up like me. Neither behind the scene or on stage.
要死不活的 More dead than alive.
谢了 杰瑞 Thanks, Jer.
我知道该怎么办了 I know what I have to do.
奥利佛 你不会去告我的状吧 Uh, Oliver, you won't tell anyone I'm here, right?
不会的 I won't tell.
但你真的该回家找马歇尔了 But... you should really go home to Marshall.
吃他的食物 And eat his food?
原来班吃过那些药 So, Ben was on all of those drugs.
强纳森说那个配方有一点冰毒 Well, but Jonathan said the cocktail had a dash of meth.
他的验尸报告怎么没提到 Why didn't that show up in his autopsy?
谢天谢地 Oh, thank God!
查尔斯 Charles?!
-母亲 -查尔斯 - Mother? - Charles!
梅宝 我被困住了 Oh! Mabel! I was trapped.
过了好几年 我有胡子吗 还有《周六夜现场》吗 Years went by! Do I have a beard? Is SNL still on?
你才消失了20分钟 You were gone for 20 minutes.
我好渴 好虚弱 Oh, well, I-- I'm parched and I'm weak.
我去帮你找电解质吧 You know what, let me see if I can find you some electrolytes.
谢谢你 终于有人替我着想了 谢谢你 托伯特 Thank you! Finally, someone's thinking about me! Thank you, Tobert!
是你叫他来的吗 我们跟他合作了吗 Did you ask him to come down here? Are we partnering with him now?
他自己跟着线索跑来的 调查中的调查员 He came here on his own to follow a lead, like investigators do in
就是这样 an investigation.
真抱歉 Oh, I'm sorry,
-是谁让谁在烟雾室里等死 -是谁... but who left who to die in a fog closet? Who left--
你跟奥利佛今天真的快惹毛我了 I swear, you and Oliver are working my last nerve today.
真的吗 Really?
奥利佛人呢 Where is Oliver?
嘿 Hey!
「当我想到你把心交给别人 "When I think of you giving your heart to another,
我就死了一千回」 I die a thousand deaths."
-再有力一点 -「死了一千回」 - Bigger! - "A thousand deaths!"
很好 成功了 再加把劲 Yes, it's working! Okay, pace it up!
「在我们紧密相依前 我绝不停歇」 "I'll never rest until we're together as we were meant to be."
对 感受他的能量 Yes! Feel him inside you!
-吉迪恩 -吉迪恩跟我们同在 Gideon! Gideon is with us!
奥利佛 住手 你在干嘛 Oliver, stop! What are you doing?!
-我在做选择 -那是证据 - I'm making a choice. - That's evidence!
这已经不是犯罪现场了 梅宝 This isn't a crime scene anymore, Mabel.
警方抓到人了 这是更衣室 The police got their guy. It's a dressing room.
既然我们明天要来排练 就得弄干净 And since we're coming in here tomorrow for rehearsal, it needs to be cleaned.
奥利佛 你太过分了 Oliver, you're crossing a line.
我太过分 Oh, I'm crossing a line?
在谋杀案当晚揍了班葛兰罗伊 却刚好忘记告诉我们的人还敢说 This from the guy who punched Ben Glenroy on the night of the murder and conveniently forgot to tell us about it.
-你揍了班 -因为他攻击罗芮塔 You what? You punched Ben? Because he attacked Loretta
我叫他离她远一点 and I told him to stay away from her.
但真正的问题是 你的作品为什么这么失控 But the real question is, why is your production so out of control
让演员们在首演夜对彼此动粗 that your actors are beating each other up on opening night?
怪我啰 Oh, this is my fault, is it?
你是导演耶 Well, you're the director.
有人必须为 Someone has to be responsible for the fact
你的戏成了死亡陷阱负责 that your show is a death trap.
光是今天 我就死里逃生三次 Today alone, I almost died three times.
-什么 -两个沙袋跟一片毒雾 - What? - Two sandbags and a killer fog.
很抱歉我试着让你进百老汇 好让你的事业起死回生 Well, I'm so, so sorry for trying to breathe life into your dead career by putting you on Broadway.
我的事业又没死 My career was not dead.
《侦探布拉奏斯》 本来想拍墨西哥卷饼短片 Did you know that Brazzos wanted to do burrito-sodes?
速食店应用程式独家播出的30秒额外集数 Thirty-second bonus episodes available exclusively on the Chipotle app.
但我拒绝了 因为我想来调查 But I said no, because I wanted to do this,
我现在发现这是天大的错误 which I realize now was a huge mistake!
是哦 Oh, it was, huh?
也许我当初应该雇用会唱歌的人 Well maybe, I should have hired someone who could actually sing!
也许吧 因为我不干了 Well, maybe you should have, because I quit.
-很好 -很好 - Fine! - Fine!
查尔斯 你为什么没说 班在首演夜发生的事 Charles! Why didn't you tell me what happened with Ben on opening night?
因为她是他女朋友 我想保护他 Because she was his girlfriend and I was trying to protect him.
因为他是我朋友 'Cause he's my buddy!
-本来是 -等等 Was. Wait,
罗芮塔也有份 她还有什么瞒着我们 Loretta's a part of this, too? What else is she keeping from us?
我不知道 老实说 我不在乎 I don't know and, frankly, I don't care.
奥利佛 你在搞什么 Oliver, what the fuck are you doing?!
你就像死咬着骨头的狗 梅宝 You know, you are like a dog with a bone, Mabel.
他们逮捕杀害班的人了 记得吗 They arrested someone for Ben's murder, remember?
你却一直想嫁祸给我的演员 And yet, you keep trying to throw suspicion onto my cast.
我知道你没做过大人的工作 You know, I know you've never had a grownup job before,
但那些工作很重要 but guess what? They matter.
-哇 -奥利佛 - Wow. - Oliver.
再过几周 罗芮塔就会演出《临死之鸣大惊奇》 In a few weeks, Loretta goes on to star in Death Rattle Dazzle,
而我终于能达成我追求了一辈子的目标 and I finally get what I've been working for my whole life.
你别想破坏我的好事 I won't let you jeopardize that!
-辛达说对了 -什么意思 - Cinda was right. - What does that mean?
-辛达坎宁 -辛达坎宁他妈的 - Cinda Canning? - Cinda fucking Canning
邀请我跟她合作 asked me to partner with her,
我说我已经加入一个团队了 and I said that I was already part of a team.
她说我不需要你们 我开始认同她了 She said that I don't need you guys, and I'm starting to see that she's right.
我一直在忍受你们这两个自恋的疯子 All I do is put up with your self-involved insanity!
音乐剧 白色房间 求婚 The musical, the White Room, the proposal,
但有个人死了 but a man is dead!
一个对我来说很重要的人 A man who actually meant something to me!
我会找出真正的凶手 And I'm gonna figure out who did it
不管你们两个在不在乎 我受够了 whether the two of you give a shit or not! I'm done!
有时候 要驱逐你的心魔... Sometimes, all you need to banish your ghosts...
只需要别人看到你 ...is for someone to see you...
太棒了 Bravo!
并且了解你的梦想 ...and understand your dreams.
只有在你独处时... It's only when you're alone...
真正的纠缠才会开始 that the real haunting begins.
字幕翻译:宋梅君