(前情提要)
他是迪奇 This is Dickie.
他不只是我经纪人 也是我哥哥 He's not just my manager, he's also my brother.
-把手举高 -我什么都没做 - Hands up! - I didn't do anything.
我认为警方抓错人了 I think the police have the wrong guy.
如果贵格有班的手帕 那班死掉的时候 If Gregg had Ben's handkerchief, then whose handkerchief was Ben holding
抓着谁的手帕 when he died?
只有另外两个男人看过这个 Only two other men have seen this before.
-你有跟他一起录我们的线上电台吗 -没有 Did you record with him for our podcast? No!
我们要慎选交往的对象 We just have to be careful who we get involved with.
你用的词汇 「他妈的猪」 That phrase you used. "Fucking Pig."
我真的那么叫他 I did call him that.
罗芮塔讨厌班 她对班很凶 Loretta hated Ben. She was violent towards Ben.
那让她成了杀人凶手或只是...怪人 Does that make her a murderer or just... quirky?
奥利佛 你在搞什么 Oliver, what the fuck are you doing!?
你一直想嫁祸给我的演员 You keep trying to throw suspicion onto my cast.
再过几周 我终于能达成我追求了一辈子的目标 In a few weeks, I finally get what I've been working for my whole life!
你的戏成了死亡陷阱 Your show is a death trap!
也许我当初应该雇用会唱歌的人 Well, maybe I should have hired someone who could actually sing!
-我不干了 -我会找出真正的凶手 I quit! And I'm gonna figure out who did it,
不管你们两个在不在乎 我受够了 whether the two of you give a shit or not! I'm done!
信不信由你 我很喜欢人们 Believe it or not, I love people.
有些人啦 Some people.
-等等 我有东西要给你看 -什么 Oh, wait. I have something to show you. What?
-你看 -不会吧 Oh, you didn't.
-没错 -别告诉我... - I did! - Don't tell-- Oy...
每个笨蛋都有一个 我根本不知道那是什么玩意 every schmuck is getting one. I don't even know what they are.
我只是未必信任他们 I just don't always trust them.
谢谢 Thank you.
请慢用 Enjoy.
(皮克快餐) (1963年开业)
他们有离开的坏习惯 They have a bad habit of leaving.
嘿 乌玛 新发型 Hey, Uma, new haircut?
口水擦一擦 变态 Keep it in your pants, perv.
但物品不一样 Things, though.
我信任物品 Things I trust.
物品经久又耐用 Things are made to last.
不管待过多少地方 经过多少世代 From place to place. From generation to generation.
所以我才会拿走和保留物品 It's why I take stuff and keep it,
把那些人留在我身边 so the people can stay with me.
如果这代表我有窃盗癖也无所谓 If that makes me a klepto, so be it.
因为当我们心爱的人离开 当回忆消逝 Because when the people we love are gone and memories fade,
还有什么能让他们长存 what the hell else keeps them alive?
这是他妈的在开玩笑吧 You gotta be fuckin' kidding me.
《破案三人行》
本WEB版外挂字幕由 风吹来的那片云 双语合并
(第三季 第七集) (毒蛇侠)
有人点餐 Order up!
坐在走道边 Sit by the aisle.
会让桌子看起来比较小 Makes the table seem smaller.
谢谢你 Thank you.
你想都别想 Don't even think about it.
我没有 我要自己看书 I wasn't. I'm reading. By myself.
赶上我的进度 Catching up on my reading.
以前我都跟邦妮分着吃 Bunny and I always used to split it.
我们每周都来 直到你们这些白痴杀了她 We came here every week, until you idiots killed her.
我们没有杀邦妮 We didn't kill Bunny.
没杀我闺蜜的人干嘛这么紧张 Pretty jumpy for someone who didn't kill my best friend.
你的朋友呢 你也杀了他们 So where are your friends? Murder them, too?
你们到底发生什么事 So, what happened with you guys, anyway?
我不演音乐剧了 I quit the musical.
-你被踢掉了 -它毁了我的生活 Ha! You got shit-canned! It was ruining my life.
我的婚约 我的理智 我跟麦金利总统的关系 My engagement, my sanity, my relationship with President McKinley.
麦金利总统是一条鱼 President McKinley is a fish.
我真的超想知道的 The suspense was killing me.
真正的朋友会在乎 但奥利佛只在乎他的戏 You know, a real friend would've cared, but Oliver only cares about his show.
很遗憾发生那种事 I'm sorry to hear that.
在我们这年纪 失去朋友很难熬 It's tough to lose friends at our age.
你这年纪当然是 但我这年纪 Oh, I'm sure it is at your age. But at mine?
而且我没失去他们 他们会回来 Besides, I didn't lose them. They'll be back.
幸好在你这个年纪 你还有很多时间能等待 Well, good thing you've got plenty of time to wait. At your age.
我以前常说世界上有三种人 I always used to say there are three types of people:
活人 死人 我当他死了的人 alive, dead, and dead to me.
我以前常当邦妮死了 Bunny was dead to me a lot.
我们吵架时 她从来不道歉 Not once did she apologize when we fought.
所以呢 你道歉了 So, what, you apologized?
我 休想 我做错什么 Me? Fuck no! What did I do?
过一阵子 你就忘了你们在吵什么 Time passes, you forget what you're fighting about.
幸好她真的死掉的时候 我没当她死了 Thank God she wasn't dead to me when she actually died.
奥利佛跟梅宝不会死 Oliver and Mabel aren't gonna die.
事实上 他们很快就会向我道歉 In fact, any second now, they're gonna reach out and apologize.
穿人字拖的天使 啪嗒啪嗒
嘿 Hey!
对 我就是 Yes, this is he.
我以为我已经是纽约爱乐之友了 I thought I was already a friend of the Philharmonic.
抱歉 现在不方便 I'm sorry, uh, this is-- this is a bad time.
他们会打来的 They'll call.
谢谢你请我吃早餐 Thanks for breakfast.
嘿 那是... Hey! Is that...?
这个嘛 他又用不到 Oh. Well, he wasn't gonna use it.
他 难道那是班当晚抓着的手帕... He? Is that the hanky Ben was holding the-the night that he--
-天啊 你点了多少东西 -还有午餐跟晚餐 - Geez, how much did you order? - I got lunch and dinner.
谢谢你来帮忙 Thanks again for helping.
我会想念这里的 I'm going to miss this place.
你好晚才开始收拾行李 你疯了 You've waited so long to pack. You're crazy.
是啊 我满脑子都是... Yeah, well... I've been too obsessed with--
「谋杀」怎么比 How do you sign "murder"?
谋杀 Murder.
从你们吵架到现在 他们有联络你吗 Any word from the guys since your fight?
我不需要他们 I don't need them.
只有我在乎这个案子 I'm the only one that cares about this case.
我只是...需要跟能帮助我 I just-- I just need to talk to someone
厘清事发经过的人谈谈 who can help me get closer to what happened.
你可以跟班的哥哥谈 You could talk to Ben's brother.
(迪奇) (班的助理)
没人比他更了解班 对吧 Nobody closer to Ben than him, right?
你认识迪奇 Do you know Dickie?
不认识
我知道他今天在楼上为班的电影道具 I know he's having a silent auction for Ben's movie stuff...
举办无声拍卖 upstairs today.
我真的很喜欢《毒蛇侠》 I really like CoBro.
是哪个 ? Which of the... ?
匹克威三胞胎 ? Pickwick ?
好 Okay.
这是诙谐歌 如果你能再轻快一点... It's a patter song. So if you can bring a little more patter-pep-up.
我最轻快就是这样了 This is as... pattery as I get.
好 谢谢你 谢了 Okay, thank you! Thanks.
请静候通知 We'll let you know.
每个人都很烂 Everyone stinks!
像样的演员在哪 我怎么都遇不到 Where are the decent actors? Why are they being kept from me?
我们的名单好像很旧 像远古时代的名单 I feel like we're working off old lists! Like ancient, crusty lists!
亲爱的小克 拜托你 Cliff, darling, please!
你知道我不喜欢你因为压力跳舞 You know how upsetting it is for me when you stress dance!
当制作人有好多来来回回的压力 你是怎么应付的 It's these ping-ponging pressures of producing! How do you do it?
不是这里就是那里有问题 If it's not one thing, it's a goddamn other,
有时候我觉得我都没有好... and sometimes I feel like I don't have a single good--
等等 我有个点子 Oh, wait. I have an idea.
万岁 但先跟妈咪说 以免它很糟糕 Hurrah. But run it by Mommy first in case it's a stinker.
我要打一通电话 I'm gonna go make a call.
奥利佛 Oliver,
我们本来有像样的人饰演警官 we had someone... decent playing the Constable,
-我知道你们两个吵架了 但... -我不会打给查尔斯 and I know you two had a spat, but-- I am not calling Charles, Donna!
他不演了 而我太正直 不会求他回来的 He quit. And I have far too much integrity to beg him to come back.
我反对 你不正直 Counterpoint, you have no integrity,
现在更是利用那一点的最佳时机 and this is the perfect time to make use of that.
还蛮有道理的 Well, that's a fair counterpoint.
戏就快重新上演了 We're almost to reopening.
油门该催到底了 It's time to pull out all the stops!
我跟小克一直努力对外宣传 Cliff and I have been out there, trying to rev people up
你改写的这部疯狂天才音乐剧 about this mad-genius musical redo of yours,
但人们都会问卡司有谁 而查尔斯是我们唯一的名人 but they do ask who's in it. And Charles was our only name.
那么说真大方 That's being generous.
听着 查尔斯不适合这角色 就这样 Look, look. Charles was wrong for the part. End of story.
他有某种守财奴的堂弟的亲和力吗 I mean, did he have a certain Ebenezer's younger cousin affability?
有 他擅长奇怪的笑声吗 或许吧 Sure. Was he good for the odd laugh?
我们开心过 Maybe. We had fun.
但现在的重点不是开心 But this isn't about fun.
查尔斯对我们的戏没有心 Charles was not committed to our show
而我认为热忱比才华重要多了 and I will take passion over talent any day.
好了 下一个是谁 So, come on, who's next?
这家伙是谁 Who's it-- Who-Who's this guy?
谁 谁 谁 ? Who? Who? Who? Well ?
我选你 ? I... pick... You! ?
抱歉 他还好吗 Uh, sorry, uh, is he okay?
他很满意就会这样 谢谢你过来 That's what he does when he loves it. Thank you for coming in.
我找的人答应了 我就知道 My guy came through. I knew it!
他在过来的路上了 My guy is on his way!
你找的人是谁 Who is your guy?
你中学时戏剧表演的替身 The ringer from your middle school play?
马克普雷特比较不红的后代 Some less famous offspring of Marc Platt?
桑德海姆的老妈妈呀 Sweet mother of Sondheim!
-是哪个... -是哪个...
是哪个匹克威三胞胎 ? Which triplet-- ?
祝你好运 那个叫帕南的是个烂人 Oh, good luck, man. That Putnam guy's a monster.
奥利佛 他不是... Oliver? He's no--
他开始重新选角了 He's already recasting?
是哪个匹克威三胞胎做的 哪一个有力气杀人 ? Which of the Pickwick triplets did it Which of the spawn had the brawn to kill? ?
婴儿岂会因弑母受审 ? Will a baby get tried for matricide? ?
咕叽咕叽咕 你或你或你最好快坦承 ? Coochie-coochie-coo time for you and you and you to admit it ?
事不宜迟 快找出是哪个匹克威三胞胎做的 ? So, quick as a whip, gotta pick Which Pickwick triplet did it ?
马修鲍德瑞克 Matthew Broderick!
我作过有关这一刻的春梦 你怎么已经会唱这首歌了 I've had sex dreams about this moment! How did you already nail that song?
我能说什么 我是个器皿 What can I say? I'm a vessel.
对 多说一点 或别说了 Yes! Say more! Or less. Or just...
或继续站在那里 让我享受这一刻 keep standing there so I can soak this in!
马修鲍德瑞克 百老汇传奇 Matthew Broderick, Broadway legend!
你竟然会参与我的戏 I-I can't believe you're gonna be in my show.
小克 你是怎么办到的 Cliff, how did you pull this off?
我跟马鲍是几年前 在珊迪飓风避难期间认识的 Oh, MB and I met years ago while sheltering during Superstorm Sandy.
当时好可怕 Ah. Scary time.
在丽思卡尔顿酒店那两周 几乎没有客房服务 Two weeks at the Ritz Carlton, almost no room service.
但我们活下来 也成了好麻吉 But we survived and now we're friends for life.
小克一打来 我就放下手上所有的事 Well, when Cliff called, I just dropped everything.
做得好 亲爱的 Nice work, sweetie.
马修 马修 这就是我们需要的 真正的舞台老将 And Matthew... Matthew! Well, this is what we needed all along. A true stage veteran.
我们受够影视圈这些假仙的挑剔鬼了 Enough with these fussy film and TV franchise phony-baloneys.
-查尔斯海登萨维奇 -没错 - Charles-Haden Savage? - Exactly.
不是 是查尔斯海登萨维奇 No, I mean, Charles-Haden Savage.
查尔斯 你又在那里装模作样 Oh, Charles! I see you lurking in that way you do,
确保大家注意到你了 making sure everyone knows you're here.
没有 莱斯特想检查大楼里所有门铃 No, no. Uh, Lester wanted to check all the doorbells in the building,
我反正有空 就说要帮他 and I wasn't doing anything. I told him I'd do it for him.
这个很正常 And this one, this one's working.
那你可以离开了 Uh, well, then you can move along now.
除非你想认识替补你的人 Unless you'd like to meet your replacement.
不用了 我们认识 Oh, no, no, we know each other.
确实认识 Yes, we do.
这不是马修第一次空降 抢走我的角色 This is not the first time Matthew has swooped in and stolen a role from me.
我说一百万遍了 你演不好《跷课天才》的 你都41岁了 For the millionth time, you would not have been a good Ferris Bueller. You were 41.
我们能回去工作了吗 我还没练好这首歌 Can we get back to work, please? I'm not sure that I've totally got this song.
是哪个匹克威三胞胎做的 哪一个会犯下如此罪行 ? Which of the Pickwick triplets did it Who of the crew would commit this crime? ?
小子岂能让妈咪应声落地 ? Might a little brat make a mommy go splat? ?
以童谣来说 这故事太血腥 ? It's a story pretty gory for a nursery rhyme-- ?
搞定 我练好了 Oh, I do. I have it. I got it.
对 他练好了 Yeah, he's got it.
查尔斯... Charles...
奥利佛 Oliver. Oliver,
我很想尝尝你冰箱里的蓝覆盆莓肠胃奶 I'd really like to try one of those blue raspberry Gut Milks I saw in your fridge.
跟我分着喝 Split one with me?
好啊 Oh, sure. Yeah.
你已经嘶...历史了 You're hisss... tory.
什么 What?
毒蛇侠的名言 CoBro catchphrase.
哇 大家真的很爱这部愚蠢的超级英雄片 Wow. People really love this dumb superhero movie.
不就是会打击犯罪的蛇吗 Isn't it just a snake that fights crime?
其实剧情是关于 褪去社会为我们贴上的标签 It's actually about shedding the labels society puts on all of us.
褪去标签 Shedding labels?
但确实也是关于打击犯罪的蛇啦 But yeah, also a snake who fights crime.
(毒蛇侠)
这是他的第一幅画 This is the first drawing of it.
班小时候构思了整个点子 Ben came up with the entire idea when he was just a kid.
后来他成名了 And later when he got famous,
就把它拍成电影 made it into a movie.
好 你的话我大概只了解一半 Okay, I understood maybe half of what you said,
但你显然是个超级大宅男 but it is clear that you are a giant nerd.
我是《毒蛇侠》迷 没啥好丢脸的 I'm a CoBro. Ain't no shame.
你是梅宝吧 奥利佛的朋友 没想到你喜欢《毒蛇侠》 Mabel, right? Oliver's friend. Didn't peg you as a CoBro fan.
对 爱死了 Yeah, huge.
我很喜欢它强调的...褪去标签 I just love how it's about... shedding labels.
哇 真有洞察力 Wow, that's... insightful.
你最喜欢系列作的哪一部 Which of the movies is your favorite?
《毒蛇侠2》 Uh... CoBro Two?
《鞭王的... The Return of...
逆袭》 the Whip Lord.
-对 那一集很好看 -对 - Yeah. - Yeah. That's a good one.
现在看就觉得还好 因为... Hasn't aged real well, though, because of the, you know...
对 那个... Right, the...
牙买加口音 我知道 Jamaican accents, I know.
不是 是特效 No, the special effects.
特效 Special effects.
我... I, uh...
我想问你一件事 可以吗 I just wanted to ask you something, if that's okay.
在班死前 你说他必须接一通电话 Right before Ben died, you said he had to take a phone call,
感觉很严重 and it seemed serious.
对方是警察还是他的医生 Was that the cops or his doctor?
因为班的验尸报告说他的血检没问题 Because Ben's autopsy said his blood work was clean,
-但我开始认为... -请你别说了 - but I started thinking-- - I'm gonna stop you there.
如果你想为你们的线上电台找八卦 If you came looking for a juicy nugget for your podcast
或挖故事卖给《每日邮报》 or maybe a story to sell to the Daily Mail,
去别的地方找 别来找我 you can try somewhere else. I'm not your guy.
抱歉 我... I-I'm sorry, I didn't--
他都死了 大家还想消费我弟弟 God, even after he's dead, everyone's just trying to make a buck off my brother.
真他妈的恶心 It's fucking gross.
但这就是我们所处的世界 But I guess that's the world we live in.
不好意思 这个的起标价是五千 Hey, excuse me, there's a minimum bid on this of 5K!
毕雷诺斯也在 Burt Reynolds was there,
-还有唐德路易斯 他声音超好听 -天啊 - Dom DeLuise, who has a wonderful voice. - Oh, my God.
我对梅尔布鲁克斯说 「如果是音乐剧呢 」 And I told Mel Brooks, "Well, what if it was a musical?"
我通常不爱人家强调自己认识名人 You know, I-- I don't normally enjoy a name drop,
但那真有意思 but that was delightful.
奥利佛 我应该警告你 我对戏总是全心投入 Oliver, I should warn you. When I commit to a show, I commit fully.
太好了 你绝对想不到 人们多常爱演不演的 Oh, I love it. You would be surprised how often people are half in, half out.
「奥利佛 我得陪孩子」 "Oh, Oliver, my kids need me."
「奥利佛 我女友离开我了 我只剩一条鱼 "Oh, Oliver, my girlfriend left me. I only have a little fishy left,
我害怕孤独」 and I'm afraid of being alone."
这是剧场耶 还有什么更重要的 I mean, this is the theater. What else even is there?
我完全同意 我想我了解警官这角色 I agree, totally. So, I-I think I understand the Constable,
但我需要你帮助我成为警官 but I'm gonna need your help to become the Constable.
这是我的过程 It's part of my process.
我演《战争游戏》时 自学怎么编码 When I did War Games, I taught myself to write code.
真厉害 Incredible.
为了《风流教师霹雳妹》 For my role in Election,
我开始到高中教书 跟学生约会 I started teaching high school and dating some students.
好... Okay...
如果警官口齿不清 我就口齿不清 If the Constable has a lisp... I have a lisp.
如果他带枪 我就带枪 你能帮我弄到枪吗 If he carries a gun, I carry a gun. Can you get me a gun?
你要什么都行 你明天回来时 Anything you want. When you come back tomorrow,
这里会像却尔登希斯顿的男人窝 this is gonna look like Charlton Heston's man-cave.
明天 首演夜在两周后 我们现在就得排练 Tomorrow? Opening night is in two weeks. We have to rehearse now.
跷课天才会休假 但马修鲍德瑞克 Ferris Bueller may take a day off, but Matthew Broderick?
马修鲍德瑞克不休假 Matthew Broderick does not.
这话太中听了 马鲍 Music to my ears, MB!
(《如何与女性交谈》)
在匹克威之众的恶棍谜团中
灯塔可会照亮线索 ? Will the lighthouse shed some light ?
是哪个孩子给老母亲一掴 ? On which kid gave ol' mom a whack ?
我有个婴儿要起诉 ? There's an infant to indict ?
我今晚就要逮捕这个小恶徒 ? I'll book this little crook tonight ?
今晚 ? Tonight ?
匹克威三胞胎怎么选 ? Which of the Pickwick picky picky ?
谁 谁 谁 ? Who? Who? Who? ?
我选你 ? Well, I... pick... You! ?
太棒了 第38次终于成功了 Incredible. 38th time's the charm.
别表现得更好 人们可能会以为是AI Don't do it any better than that. People might think it's an AI.
谢谢 奥利佛 我确实觉得很不错 Thanks. Thanks, Oliver. Yeah. Yeah. I feel pretty good about it.
-等不及明天再来一遍了 -奥利佛 他是哪里人 Yeah. Okay, okay. Can't wait to do it all again tomorrow. So, Oliver, uh, where's he from?
这个警官的家乡在哪里 Where's he from originally, this Constable?
他只是...他跟你同乡 我们就不用再改了 Oh, he's just-- He's from where you're from, so we don't have to change anything else.
他是曼哈顿人 He's from Manhattan?
你这么一说 我都惊呆了 Well, slap my ass and call me Mamie!
这会彻底改变他跟工作的关系 This changes his entire relationship to his profession.
这... It--
不会啦 真的吗 No. Does it really?
1890年代的曼哈顿正因种族紧张而骚动 A kid from Manhattan in the 1890s. The city roils with ethnic tension.
爱尔兰人 普鲁士人 Irishmen, Prussians.
脚踏车狂热的年代 还有马车 The era of the bicycle craze, the horse-drawn trolley.
我们必须重新思考 Yeah, this calls for some rethinking.
不用 真的不用 No, no, no, it really doesn't. It--
请你回去弹琴 Uh, back to the piano, please.
三个小宝宝在他们的摇篮里 ? Three little babes in their bassinets ?
我看看 Let's see.
三个小宝宝 ? Three little babes... ?
嗨 Hi.
我只想说我真的很抱歉 I just wanted to say I'm so sorry.
我...也失去过亲人 I've lost people, too.
没关系 我不该把气出在你身上 It's okay. I shouldn't have taken it all out on you.
怎么说 Taken what out on me?
我只是很挫败 Just frustration.
我弟弟一直是我的责任 My brother has always been my business.
我爸妈以为他们不孕 就领养了我 My folks adopted me when they thought they couldn't have kids,
后来却生下班 but then they had Ben.
奇迹班 童星班 所以我这辈子都在保护他 Miracle Ben, child star Ben. So, I spent my life protecting him.
对了 那家伙老是惹是生非 A guy who, by the way, was always fucking up, you know?
没同理心的玩笑 酒驾 露鸟照 好几千张的露鸟照 Insensitive jokes, DUIs- Oh, the dick pics. The thousands of dick pics.
我从来没在报上看过... I never read anything about the--
因为有我收拾善后 挽救他的颜面 That's 'cause I was there, cleaning up the mess, making him look good.
但每一件事的功劳仍然是他的 But he still gets all the credit. For everything.
我们的生活故事 Story of our lives.
名气 《毒蛇侠》系列电影... The fame, the CoBro franchise, the--
抱歉 我... Sorry, I'm, uh...
看来他真的很难搞 Sounds like he was really difficult.
是啊 Uh, yeah.
不过呢 But, you know,
有时候我觉得人是由一千个小细节组成的 sometimes I think a person's just a... collection of a thousand little details.
当他们走了 你最想念的就是那些细节 And when they're gone, those are the things you miss most.
班很爱珍奶 那个恶心的绿茶味 Ben loved boba, that disgusting green tea flavor,
还有IG上好笑的小狗影片 and... funny dog videos on Instagram.
他把所有时钟调快20分钟 以便他高调登场 He set all his clocks 20 minutes early so he'd always be fashionably late.
很遗憾班不在了 I'm sorry Ben is gone.
但我们必须为你弟弟找出真正的凶手 But I think we owe it to your brother to find his real killer.
已经找到了 那个疯子入狱是不幸中的大幸 We did. That's the only silver lining, that maniac's locked up.
我始终不相信贵格会杀人 I guess I never bought that Gregg was a killer.
他不是把你跟查尔斯海登萨维奇 绑在地下室吗 Didn't he chain you and Charles-Haden Savage up in a basement?
对 但我无法想象他会伤害班 他很爱他 Yeah, but I can't picture him hurting Ben. I mean, he loved him.
我有个关于手帕的推论... And I have this theory about a hanky...
手帕 A hanky?
天啊 贵格到处跟踪我弟弟好几年了 Jesus. Gregg had been following my brother around for years.
我早该知道他的危险性 I should have sensed he might turn dangerous,
我一个不注意 他就杀了我弟弟 and when I took my eye off the ball for one second, he killed my brother.
那是我要背一辈子的包袱 I have to live with that for the rest of my life.
谋杀案当晚 贵格在这里 警方说班是12点6分死的 Gregg was here the night of the murder. The cops say Ben died at 12:06,
事后有人看到贵格离开亚柯尼亚 and Gregg was seen leaving the Arconia right after that.
你想想吧 抱歉 梅宝 You do the math. I'm sorry, Mabel.
这里没有故事 There's no story here.
我现在必须领养你了 What, I have to adopt you now?
我知道你来干嘛 东西不能给你 I know why you're here. You can't have it.
我知道你想留着班的手帕 但它是线索 Look, I know you wanna keep Ben's hanky but it's a clue,
是给奥利佛和梅宝的完美赎罪礼 which makes it the perfect peace offering for Oliver and Mabel.
我以为你在等他们道歉 I thought you were waiting for them to apologize.
我应该没本钱等 I don't think I can afford to.
万一我再也听不到难懂的千禧世代哏 I mean, what if I never hear another millennial reference that I don't get,
或是跟巴克亨利 在夜店共度的黑暗夜晚呢 or another story about dark nights at Plato's Retreat with Buck Henry?
听起来没那么糟啊 That doesn't sound so bad.
我原本也这么想 但我得跟他们和好 That's what I used to think. But I need to make up with them.
你要让手帕解决你的问题 So you're gonna let a hanky solve your problems?
他妈的有话就说 Use your fuckin' words!
听着 就算我想帮忙 而我真的不想 Look, even if I wanted to help, which I sincerely do not,
我没有手帕了 I don't have it, okay?
它明明在你包包里 Uh-huh, I saw it in your purse.
那是三小时前的事 That was three hours ago.
有个白痴花了七千块买下它 I got some moron to pay me seven grand for it.
你动作太慢了 Snooze you lose!
你把它卖了 但我需要它 梅宝认为它可能属于凶手 What, you sold it? But I need it! Mabel thinks it may belong to the killer.
你把它卖给谁 Who'd you sell it to?
楼上的其中一个蛇宅男 真正的男人都跑哪去了 One of those snake dorks upstairs. Whatever happened to real men?
谁 谁 我... Who? Who? Well!
梅尔 你当年筹备《金牌制作人》时 Mel. When you were putting together The Producers,
我一直没机会看啦... which, you know, I-I never did get a chance to see--
你没看过《金牌制作人》 What? You never saw The Producers?
我当时很忙嘛 Well, I was busy at the time.
它演了六年 超过2500场 It ran for six years! Over 2,500 performances!
而你一直没机会看 And you never got a chance to see it?
对 时间就是搭不上 Yeah, well, the times never worked out for me. Anyway,
总之 你跟鲍德瑞克合作有碰过问题吗 did you have any problems working with Broderick?
-我正在跟他合作新的作品... -天啊 You know, I-I'm working with him on something now, and-- Oh, my God.
你该不会跟他说 你会考虑他的点子吧 You didn't tell him, in any way, you were open to his ideas, did you?
我可能有说他可以... Well, I-I-I might have told him he could--
奥利佛 你死定了 Oh, Oliver. You're fucked.
选 选你
怎么了 What?
贵格不在这里 Gregg wasn't here.
班被谋杀时 贵格不在大楼里 Gregg wasn't in the building when Ben was murdered.
警方不是说他在吗 Didn't the cops say he was?
警方说班的死亡时间是12点6分 The police said Ben died at 12:06,
但那是班掉下来 他的手表停住而显示的时间 but that's because it was the time on Ben's watch when he fell and it stopped.
迪奇说班总是把他的手表调快20分钟 Dickie said Ben always set his watch 20 minutes early,
代表他的死亡时间是12点26分 which means he died at 12:26!
贵格当时已经走了 Gregg was already gone!
他不可能把班推下去 He couldn't have pushed Ben!
现在谁才是超级大宅女 Now who's the giant nerd?
真好笑 Oh, ha-ha.
手表 The watch?
班是常迟到 但没想到他是刻意的 I knew Ben was always late, but I never knew it was intentional.
我只觉得他是个混蛋 I just thought he was a dick.
是吗 你的设备还真高档 Yeah. Some pretty fancy equipment you have there.
对吧 辛达坎宁不是唯一有顶尖设备的人 Right? Cinda Canning's not the only one with access to top-notch equipment.
班葛兰罗伊丧命时 百老汇陷入了混乱之中 When Ben Glenroy died, Broadway was thrown into chaos.
我们将会解密班的人生终幕 敬请期待这一季的《大楼... We'll lift the curtain on Ben's final act this season on Only Murder--
我们可能得改名了 Guess we're gonna have to change the name.
我早就想到了 《血腥梅宝线上电台》 I am way ahead of you on that. The Bloody Mabel Podcast.
很性感 让你成为中心人物 Huh? I think it's sexy. Puts you front and center, which is nice--
不要 No!
这主意烂透了 但我想... I mean, it's a terrible idea, but I just thought--
大概是粉丝弄的 It's probably a fan submission.
托伯特 西欧 西欧 托伯特 Uh, Tobert, Theo. Theo, Tobert.
老兄 幸会 Hey, man. Nice to meet you.
哇 你就是那个... Oh, wow, you're the guy from--
你这个人真有意思 Wow, you're an interesting guy.
梅宝说过很多你的事 我是在线上电台听到的啦 Mabel's told me a lot about you. Well, I mean, from listening to the podcast.
我是说我是粉丝 所以我知道... I mean, I-I'm a fan, is what I'm saying, so I picked up on...
你没跟我说过他的眼睛 You didn't tell me about his eyes.
他说什么 What's that?
他说他喜欢你的海报 真的捕捉到我的眼神 He said he liked your poster. Really captured my eyes.
这传单怎么了 What's up with the flyer?
这是第一本漫画书 对吧 This is the first comic book, right?
你看看作者 Look at the author.
作者 Author?
「B葛兰罗伊」 是班 Oh, B. Glenroy. It's Ben Glenroy.
(B葛兰罗伊)
(R葛兰罗伊)
- 什么 - B其实是R What, the B is an R? What?
对 R 有时候男人的名字是R开头的 Yeah, R. Sometimes, a man's name actually starts with an R.
好 这是R 代表什么 理查 Okay, so, it's an R. For what, like Richard--
迪奇 是迪奇 D-Dickie. Dickie.
「我们的生活故事」 "Story of our lives."
-什么 -迪奇说过班抢走所有功劳 What? Dickie said Ben always got the credit.
还有名气跟《毒蛇侠》系列电影 And the fame. And the CoBro franchise.
我当下没多想 但是... I didn't think anything of it then, but--
好 所以《毒蛇侠》是迪奇的创作 Okay, so, what? CoBro was Dickie's creation,
然后... and...
班把它抢走 靠它赚进几百万 Ben just stole it and made millions off of it?
迪奇还要帮他张罗大小事 All the while, Dickie's doing everything for him?
该死 真冷血 Damn, that's cold.
那就是动机 That's motive.
让我弄清楚 我们的推论就建立在B是R上面 And, just to be clear, our theory rests entirely on this B being an R?
我们曾经指控史汀杀人 就因为他讨厌狗 We once accused Sting of murder because he doesn't like dogs.
这对我们来说已经是有力证据了 This is actually pretty solid evidence for us.
-也是 -我们再继续调查 - Yeah. That's true. That's true. - Let's do some digging.
-但要事先办 我们来录音... -好 - But, first things first, let's record. - Yes.
把你弄出来 And get you out.
来吧 Come on.
(贵格) (跟踪狂)
然后... And...
转向 转身 跳 等一下 and turn, twist, ha-- Wait a minute.
转半圈 转身 我选你 Half turn, twist, "I pick you."
新斯科细亚省的警官会这样持枪吗 Would a constable from Nova Scotia point like this, though?
根据我的研究 他们的训练是在用枪时放低双手 From my research, they were trained to keep their hands low, by their firearms.
所以他们会这样持枪 不会这样 So they would point like this. Never like this,
但这样... but this.
我不知道 感觉好假 I don't know, this feels so false.
-回家吧 -你说什么 - Go home! - Excuse me?
回家吧 Go... home.
我受够你疯狂的问题了 马修鲍德瑞克 I've had enough of your inane questions, Matthew Broderick.
没人在乎警官是什么教派 Nobody cares what denomination the Constable is
或是他弹曼陀林的指法 警官就只是警官 or how he'd finger a mandolin. The Constable is just the Constable.
他爸妈没帮他取名叫 洛基 罗伦斯或波纳多 知道为什么吗 His parents didn't name him "Rocky" or "Lawrence" or "Bernardo." You know why?
-为什么 -因为他没有爸妈 - Why? - Because he doesn't have any parents!
他只是6公克的墨水 我硬碟里的几个电子 He's just six grams of ink on paper! A few electrons in my hard disk!
就是这样 That's it!
我明天起床可能会按下删除键 他就没了 I could wake up tomorrow, and I could hit the delete key, and poof! He'd be gone.
从这部音乐剧中消失 从我们的现实被放逐 Eradicated from this musical. Exiled from our reality!
像微波炉里的老鼠一样挂掉 Gone! Like a rat in a microwave!
好吧 明天早上6点见 新斯科细亚省时间 Oh, okay. Well, see you tomorrow morning, 6:00 AM, Nova Scotia time!
我没有装模作样 莱斯特想检查门眼 因为 I'm not lurking. Uh, Lester wanted to inspect the peepholes
有些门眼显然被装反了 我就自愿帮忙 because, evidently, some of them had been installed backwards, so I said, "Well, I'll do it,"
他说凌晨2点比较合适 and he said, "You know, the good time is 2:00 AM,"
所以我...我说谎 我只想说我很抱歉 so I-I'm lying. I just wanted to say... I'm sorry.
我接受 我们和好了 你被雇用了 Oh, apology accepted. Friendship mended. You're hired.
不 我不想演 我只想跟你混 No, no! I don't wanna do the show. I just wanna hang out.
当然好 我们随时都能一起混 一周八场 Of course! We'll do that all the time. Eight shows a week.
-鲍德瑞克 你被开除了 -等一下 And Broderick, you're fired. Wait a minute!
等等 这家伙 我看过比他会演戏的马 Wait, this guy? I've seen him get out-acted by a horse.
或许是吧 Maybe he was.
但我猜那匹马那天在片场很开心 But I'm guessing that horse enjoyed himself on set that day
因为它可以跟查尔斯海登萨维奇一起度过 because he got to spend it with Charles-Haden Savage,
他八成对它很好 还用手掌喂它吃一大把燕麦 who was probably kind to him and fed him a fistful of oats out of his palm.
我敢说那匹马不知道它有多好运 And I bet that horse didn't realize how good he had it
直到它在别的片场遇到别的对戏伙伴 until he had another scene partner on another set,
而对方只会骑它...骑它 who just rode him! And rode him! And rode him! And rode him!
骑它...骑它 And rode him! And rode him! And rode him!
直到它受不了为止 Until he couldn't take it anymore!
我敢说那匹马很希望它能说抱歉 但它没办法 And I bet that horse wishes he could say sorry, but he can't.
不是因为它是马 而是因为它有点情绪问题 Not because he's a horse. Because he's a little messed up emotionally,
所以它只能痛恨自己 觉得它伤了自己最好的朋友罪该万死 so all he can do is hate himself, uh, and, and-and wish he were dead for hurting his best friend,
有人该把它做成胶水 and that someone would turn him into glue.
我接受你的道歉 Apology accepted.
好啦 我会演这出戏 Okay! Okay, I'll do the play!
对了 那匹马因为那一幕得了派西奖 By the way, that horse won a Patsy for that scene.
什么是派西奖 What's a Patsy?
马界的艾美奖 It's an Emmy for horses!
「你还在这里 You're still here?
结束了 回家吧 It's over. Go home.
走吧」 Go.
如果你想做任何调整 我很有弹性的 You know, if you have any adjustments, I'm very flexible.
我一直觉得最好... And I've always found it's best to be hon--
你一定能把《跷课天才》演得更好 I bet you would have made a much better Ferris.
你是认真的吗 Do you mean that?
我希望是 Oh, I want to.
但他太完美了 But he's perfect.
这不只是麦克风 对吧 It's a bit more than just a mic, huh?
对 你记得奥利佛用什么软体吗 Uh, in terms of software, do you remember what Oliver was using?
别担心这个了 应该很直截了当 You know what? Don't even worry about it. It should be pretty straightforward.
你想到电台的新名称了吗 我现在就能输入 Do you have a new name for the podcast? I can punch that in right now.
你知道吗 我应该会用手机自己录音 好吗 You know what? Uh, I think I'm just gonna record this on my phone, okay?
好啊 Oh, sure.
谢谢你 Thank you.
你就爱提醒我 你那样破了三起谋杀案 You solved three murders that way, as you're fond of reminding me.
(我也搞不懂她)
乌玛 那个卑鄙的骗子 Uma! That sneaky devil-nymph!
直接从班手中拿走那条手帕 我们怎么没发现 Took that hanky right out of Ben's dead hands. How did we miss that?
你跟梅宝都很歇斯底里 我第一次看到 Well, you and Mabel were in hysteria. I've never seen anything like it.
但我怎么没发现 But, me? How did I miss it?
你跟她谈过吗 Have you talked to her?
梅宝 没有 Mabel? No.
我试着打给她 I tried calling.
-真的吗 -假的 - Really? - No!
她会生气的 She'd hate that.
但我草拟了一封简讯 But I did draft a text. Uh, ended up...
最后又删掉大部分内容 deleting most of it, a-and then...
后来我不小心传了一个逗号给她 她还没回应 I accidentally sent her a comma. Haven't heard back.
我真的让她伤透心了 年轻人所谓的史诗级失败 I really messed up with her. What the kids would call an epic fail.
你为什么擦班的镜子 Why did you erase that mirror?
我得让你看个东西 I need to show you something.
这是我从罗芮塔的公寓拿的 I took this from Loretta's apartment.
你觉得呢 What do you think?
-我觉得不是她干的 -天啊 这代表她就是凶手 I don't think she did it. Oh, my God, that means she's a killer.
-为什么 -拜托 查尔斯 - Why? - Oh, please, Charles.
你对这种事的直觉又不是多准确 It's not like your instincts on these things are famously good.
我没说这不奇怪 但这不是谋杀的证据 I'm not saying it's not weird. It's just not evidence of murder.
你担心的话 干嘛不问罗芮塔 Hey, if you're worried, why don't you just talk to Loretta?
我就希望我问过裘伊 I wish I'd just talked to Joy.
嘿 Hey...
如果我们把这个交给梅宝 当做赎罪礼呢 What if we took this and gave it to Mabel as a peace offering?
用线索让她消气 Win her back with a clue.
我们也可以认命道歉 Or we could just suck it up and apologize.
先用线索 如果没用 再巴结她 Clue first, a-and then if that doesn't work, then we grovel.
嘿 Hey.
我记得是鹿特丹的伊拉斯谟... I believe it was Erasmus of Rotterdam...
梅宝 我对查尔斯跟我的行为 感到很抱歉... Mabel, I am sorry for the way Charles... who described apologies as... and, to some extent, I behaved. You know--
你们是搬家工人吗 Are you the movers?
搬家工人 Movers?
我才不付钱治你们的疝气 I'm not paying to un-fuck your hernias.
什么 What?
(《大楼谋杀疑云》)
四周前一个宿命般的夜晚 On a fateful night, four weeks ago,
好莱坞巨星班葛兰罗伊死了 而且是两次 Hollywood superstar Ben Glenroy died. Twice.
我会说明事发经过 以及他的谋杀谜团何以比我们预期的 I'll explain that and how the mystery of his murder is even more complicated than we've been led
还要复杂许多 to believe.
什么 What?
为了尽快安抚大众 In a rush to keep the public calm,
警方逮捕了长期跟踪班的贵格瑞维拉 the police arrested Ben's longtime stalker Gregg Rivera.
但班被人推下电梯井时 贵格根本不在大楼里 But Gregg wasn't even in the building when Ben was pushed down that elevator shaft.
我认为当晚在大楼里的人 几小时前也跟班在一起 I believe whoever was in the building that night was also with Ben hours earlier,
试着在他的百老汇处女秀开演前 对他下毒 when they tried to poison him just moments before his Broadway debut.
到底是谁杀了班葛兰罗伊 So, who did kill Ben Glenroy?
也许凶手有理由 Maybe it was someone who had a reason.
钱 嫉妒 想证明什么 Money? Jealousy? Something to prove?
也许以上皆是 Maybe all of the above.
我是梅宝摩拉 I'm Mabel Mora.
跟这次单飞的我 一起寻找答案吧 Join me, flying solo this time, in the search for answers
敬请收听新一季的《大楼谋杀疑云》 on a new season of Only Murders in the Building.
标签 血腥梅宝 #BloodyMabel.
对 我听了 Yeah, I heard it.
(毕斯瓦警探)
你说对了 他们非常讨人厌 You were right. They're a major pain in the ass.
该重启葛兰罗伊的案子了 And it's time to reopen the Glenroy case.
(《血腥梅宝》线上电台) (《大楼谋杀疑云》)
(令人期待的衍生线上电台)
(包含身体亮粉与凌波舞横杆)
(班葛兰罗伊) (犹大教成人礼DJ)
字幕翻译:宋梅君